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Head nodding, Sora jerked awake again. He blinked hard and the gummi ship’s controls swirled back into brightly coloured focus. His heart pounded, fear freezing in his veins. He couldn’t let himself fall asleep. He didn’t want to. He hated the nothingness; the blackness that closed around him, the silence that fell. What if he didn’t wake up? What if he hadn’t regained enough strength from helping Hercules out and he drifted back into that abyss of sleep? It had closed around him like death. He couldn’t go back to that. Just thinking about it scared him.
He could find a way to stay awake, right? Coffee. That would help. Donald tried to hide his stash, but Sora wasn’t a total idiot and he knew exactly where –
“Ahem.”
“Ah!” He jerked, horrified to find he’d fallen asleep again. Looking to his left, he saw Donald staring at him.
“Are you okay?” Donald asked.
“Y-yeah,” Sora said. “I just forgot to make the ship move is all.”
Actually, he’d sat down and fallen asleep the moment his butt touched the seat because fighting Titans when he’d lost almost all his power was actually really, really, really hard work.
“You need to sleep,” Goofy said. He stretched and yawned. “I could use a nap too.”
“I’m not tired!” Sora said it so loudly he surprised himself. His cheeks flushed. “Sorry.”
“What’s wrong?” Donald asked.
“Nothing!” Sora said. “I’ll take us back to Master Yen Sid’s now.”
“Not if you’re gonna fall asleep at the controls!” Donald said. He jumped down from his seat and came over. “Up!”
Too tired to argue, Sora did as he was asked.
He pretended not to notice the look Donald and Goofy gave each other.
“I’m gonna go find something to eat,” Sora said, making his way out of the cockpit.
“You can sleep if you want,” Goofy said.
“No!” Sora cried out.
“Alright, that’s it!” Donald said. He stared at Sora. “Start talking. Something’s bothering you, and you need to tell us what it is right now.”
“What?” Sora held out his hands. “Nothing’s bothering me!”
Donald growled. “You’re lying.”
“No, I’m not!” Except he was, and he’d never been very good at it.
“Sora,” Goofy said, his voice calm as ever. “You don’t need to keep secrets from us.”
Sora hesitated. He didn’t want to worry them. He was probably freaking out over nothing. Besides, people were always talking about how good coffee was at waking people up in the morning, so if he used it right now, he could stay awake and he wouldn’t fall asleep and maybe never wake up again.
“We’re gonna sit here ‘til you tell us,” Donald said.
Sora crossed his arms and looked away. “There’s nothing to tell.” He ruined it with a yawn.
“When was the last time you slept properly?” Goofy asked.
“I slept when I failed the exam.” A familiar flash of shame shot through him. “I shouldn’t need to sleep again for ages.”
Sora saw Donald and Goofy share that look they had. The one that told him he wasn’t fooling anyone.
“Are you scared to sleep?” Donald asked.
Groaning, Sora slumped. “You’re too good at this.”
“What’s up, Sora?” Goofy asked. “We can tell when something’s bothering you.”
“And we can tell when you aren’t sleeping,” Donald added.
Sora stared at his boots. His feet had grown lately. His toes actually grazed the ends. He was gonna need a new pair…
“Sora,” Donald said, tone threatening.
Worried he might take a wand to the head, Sora spat it out. To his boots. “I don’t like falling asleep.”
“Why not?” Goofy asked.
He’d started, so he needed to finish. “Because what if I don’t wake up?” He raised his head. “What if this is still a dream and I never woke up? I might be trapped in the darkness with no way out, dreaming that everything’s okay and – ”
Donald came over. He leapt up, wand appearing in his hand, and whacked Sora on the head.
“Ow! Donald!”
“There! You’re awake.” Donald looked very satisfied. “Everybody knows you don’t feel pain in dreams.”
Rubbing the sore spot, Sora sighed. “Fine, I’m awake. But I might not be next time. And you can’t hit me on the head every time! You might damage something.”
Donald started to speak.
“Ah!” Sora said, pointing at him. “I do too have a brain!”
“If you say so,” Donald muttered.
“Well, how about we come up with another way to make sure you know you’re really awake?” Goofy asked.
“Like what?” Sora asked.
“We could ask you some questions,” Goofy said. “Two that’ll be the same every time, and one that’ll have to change.”
“What if I dream about you asking me the questions?” Sora asked. “I won’t be able to tell the difference.” He needed this to be fool-proof.
“Do you have to go and complicate everything?” Donald asked.
Sora moved towards the ship’s galley. “I’ll just go find the coffee.”
“No, Sora, stop. I’m sorry,” Donald said. “This is really bothering you and we need to fix it.”
“Right,” Goofy said. “Maybe after the first three questions, you can ask us something only we’d know the answer to, and then you’d know we were really us and not dream versions of us,” Goofy said.
“Yeah, like something you’ve always wanted to ask us but never have. Because then you won’t know the answer already,” Donald said.
“And if I just dream the answer?” Sora asked.
“Are you sure you’re not just creating problems so you won’t go to sleep?” Donald asked.
“Um… maybe?” Sora offered.
“Me and Donald are gonna be right here,” Goofy said. “Promise.”
Sora nodded. “Okay, thanks. I’ll try it.”
You always were such a sound sleeper.
In the immediate rush to save Rapunzel, Sora hadn’t had a chance to stop and think. But after the fight was over, and they were about to set off for the next world, worry settled over him. His hands let go of the controls and he sat back.
“Donald? Goofy?”
“You okay, Sora?” Donald asked.
He turned in his chair to look at his friends. “I… I am awake right now, aren’t I?”
Donald looked at him. “Did you mean to go to sleep?”
“No,” Sora said.
“Do you feel awake right now?” Goofy asked.
“Yeah,” Sora said. The adrenaline had burned out the last of the sleepiness Marluxia’s spell had cast over him.
“Did you dance with Rapunzel before or after you fell asleep?” Donald asked.
“Before,” Sora said. He smiled at the memory. “That was fun.” He sat back. “Okay. My turn.” He thought hard. “Oh! I know!” Sora turned to Donald. “How come you decided to learn how to use magic instead of going into business like your Uncle Scrooge?”
“It all started when Mickey got the Keyblade,” Donald said. “Because I knew he was gonna need some help. You remember what he was like, when we went back to the past and met him?”
“Yeah, he was kinda different back then,” Sora said, thinking back to the Timeless River with a smile. Mickey sure hadn’t been very kingly back then.
“Exactly!” Donald said. “So I knew I couldn’t let him go running off to all the worlds without some help. I started studying under Merlin, then Master Yen Sid. And I picked up a few tricks on some other worlds too. That’s how I learned spells to help blend in.”
“Oh yeah!” Goofy said. “Tell Sora about that time you went to that world with all the bugs!”
“Bugs? What did you turn into?” Sora asked.
Donald sighed. “I was an apprentice back then, okay? I wasn’t as good at these things as I am now.”
“What was it?” Sora asked. “Was it that bad?”
Sora listened, amazed and delighted, as Donald told him about the time his magic turned him into a caterpillar instead of a butterfly. By the time Donald finished explaining how he’d barely escaped being eaten by a crow, Sora’s sides hurt so much from laughing, he knew there was no way he was still asleep. He was still laughing when he took the controls and flew them to their next destination, picturing a caterpillar with a beak wiggling away from a hungry crow.
Sora stared up at the doors in the Monsters Inc factory. He knew his closet door would be in there somewhere because he hadn't forgotten the monster that used to live in there.
We Scare Because We Care.
And his parents told him he was only dreaming.
Ha, he'd showed them.
Sora dragged himself out of the snow, shivering madly. He could hear his bones knocking into each other. Homesickness shot through him. He’d do anything to be warm right now. “Ugh, avalanches are the worst!”
“You okay?” Goofy asked, brushing snow off his shoulders.
“Yeah,” Sora said. “And don’t worry, I know I’m awake.” He jumped up and down on the spot, longing for a coat yet again. And gloves. And a hat. And a scarf. And all that other winter weather clothing he’d heard about. “There’s no way I could dream it this cold.”
Sora stirred. Opening his eyes, he found himself in the bedroom they often borrowed from Uncle Scrooge when stopping over at Twilight Town. Donald and Goofy insisted taking a break after Arendelle, and Sora, eager to never ever be that cold again no matter how much he liked snow, agreed.
It felt so good to be warm again. Smiling and stretching, he relished every pop and crunch in his body. He rolled out of bed, his feet hitting the plush carpet. Wow, Uncle Scrooge really knew how to splash out on the best of everything.
“Donald? Goofy?” Sora called as he headed into the large lounge. No, wait, what did Uncle Scrooge call it? The parlour, right. The guy was so fancy. “Are you here?”
Silence greeted him. Sora didn’t let it bother him. He’d probably overslept and they’d let him. Or maybe they had tried to wake him up and he just… hadn’t. That was probably more likely. He really needed to work on that. Maybe he could learn to be a lighter sleeper? “Ha! Yeah, right!” That seemed unlikely. How many times had Donald used a weak Thunder spell to shock him awake? More times than he really wanted to think about.
So why hadn’t Donald done that this morning? Sora tried to remember if they were supposed to be somewhere. Nothing came to mind. He plodded through the empty apartment. Everything was silent, even the street outside. Moving to the nearest window, Sora opened it and stuck his head out.
Silence. Not even the local residential district trams and trains ran along the tracks.
That was… odd.
Sora grabbed his boots and headed out. Something must’ve happened. Something bad. He kept his hand loose, ready to summon the Keyblade at the first sign of trouble.
He turned the corner and saw the bistro ahead. Donald and Goofy stood there, their backs to him. At last. He’d found them.
“Hey guys, what’s going on? Where’d everybody go?”
Donald and Goofy turned to him in perfect sync. Neither spoke. Their faces were bland, emotionless.
Sora’s heart thudded nervously. “What’s wrong?” he asked.
Silence.
“I’m sorry I overslept,” Sora said. “I guess I –”
“Sora,” Donald said. “Are you even awake?”
“What? Of course I am! Don’t say that!”
“I’m not so sure,” Goofy said. “I mean, if you were awake, could I do this?”
Without warning, Goofy faded into darkness.
Sora lurched forwards, grabbing at the air where Goofy used to be. It couldn’t be real. It couldn’t be! “What happened?”
Donald didn’t answer. Sora turned and saw his friend walking away, heading down the tram tracks. “Wait, Donald! Come back!”
Sora ran after him. He passed under the tram arch, shadow falling over him. He heard the rush of water, and he stopped. Turning around, Sora saw a massive wall of water rushing towards him. “Oh, no!”
He tried to escape, but the wave crashed into him, throwing him off his feet and pushing him down into its depths. He looked up and saw Donald’s blurry shape looking down at him. Sora reached out to his friend, only to watch him too fade away.
No!
Sora kicked hard against the water, swimming up as fast as he could. It didn’t work. The water never ended. He sank, deeper and deeper, no matter how much he tried not to.
Darkness curled around him, pulling hard. It pulled him deeper, taking him further from the light. He didn’t have the strength to escape.
He couldn’t… couldn’t give in… He had to get out. He had to wake up! He had to –
“Sora!”
He jolted, eyes opening to find his friends looking at him. It was dark, and he was in bed in Twilight Town… Soft light came from the lamp in the corner. Stars shone outside the nearby window.
“Is this real?” He asked. He reached out, grabbing Donald and Goofy. “You guys are okay, right?”
“We’re fine,” Donald said. He squeezed Sora’s hand. “Sounded like a bad nightmare.”
“I thought I was awake.” Sora sucked in a deep breath, pulling all his tears back in with it. He pulled his hands free from his friends’ and scrubbed his face. “That was a bad dream.”
“Did you mean to fall asleep?” Donald asked.
Sora nodded. Just like in the dream, they’d stopped off at Twilight Town to drop off ingredients, restock on potions, and take a day or two to recover from their latest battles.
“Do you feel awake right now?” Goofy asked.
“Kinda.” It was hard to shake a dream that looked a lot like reality. And he still felt exhausted. If he closed his eyes, he’d be asleep again. Except the nightmare was right there, lingering, ready to haul him back in.
“Did you cook with Little Chef before you went to bed?” Donald asked.
“Uh…” He didn’t think so? Actually, he barely remembered arriving at Twilight Town. After making sure Elsa and Anna were okay and the journey back to Twilight Town, the battle with the Skoll took its toll and he’d practically sleep-walked through everything until he finally found an actual bed and fell into it face first and… “I don’t think I even ate dinner.”
“You nearly fell asleep in your soup,” Goofy said with a chuckle. “Don’t worry, we saved some for you.”
“Thanks,” Sora said.
“Okay, Sora, your turn for a question,” Donald said.
Heartbeat less frantic, Sora settled against his pillow. He curled up on his side. “So, Goofy, why did you decide to become a knight?”
“That’s easy! I wanted to protect my friends. Mickey can get too carried away sometimes, and Donald’s too hot-headed, so I knew they’d need me to take care of both of them. After all, that’s what friends do.”
“What was your training like?” Sora asked through a massive yawn.
He was asleep again before Goofy finished telling him.
As time went by, Sora felt more certain about what was real and what were dreams. His friends patiently went through their routine every time, supporting Sora to sort nightmares and dreams from reality. Even Donald and Goofy struggled a bit after ‘Jack’ turned back into little white crabs.
“You sure we’re awake?” Sora asked, blinking in the sunlight. He wiped the sweat from his forehead. “Because that was weird, right?”
“If we’re not awake, we’re all dreaming the same thing,” Donald said.
“And that’d be a first for us!” Goofy said.
“Okay, good,” Sora said. “Because this’d be pretty out there even for me.”
Sometimes, Sora just had to accept his real, waking life was pretty strange, and that weirdness followed him into his dreams. After all, how many people could say they went from a world where you could sail pirate ships to another where robots flew through the sky? As long as his friends were with him, he knew everything would be alright. Lately, whenever he awoke from a nightmare, Donald, Goofy or Jiminy would be with him, helping him remember what was real and what wasn’t. Jiminy always asked him to help with the journal, which was a great way to sort out things he’d experienced and the things he’d dreamt of. And he’d learned all kinds of things about his friends because of the questions. In some ways, his weird fear that maybe he’d never woken up had brought him even closer to his friends.
Now, sitting aboard the gummi ship, heading from the Keyblade Graveyard, Sora found himself in a thoughtful mood. Reaching the new world, ignoring the lingering feeling he’d been there before because that was Ven’s memory and not his, Sora put the ship into orbit.
“You ready for this?” Donald asked.
“Yeah,” Sora said. Ignoring the little flutters dancing in his chest, he stood up and turned to his friends. “Before we go, I just wanted to say thank you. For everything. For always making sure I was okay, especially when I didn’t know if I was dreaming or not.”
“You know you’re welcome,” Goofy said.
“Right,” Donald said. “We’re here for you, just like you’re always there for us.”
“One for all and all for one,” Sora said.
“That’s right,” Goofy said.
Sora nodded. “Let’s do this.”
He didn’t think about being trapped in dreams again…
…until he found himself on the streets of an unfamiliar city, memory shaky on how he got there.
Something about a price to pay? Was that right?
There was no one around to ask.