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Lars knows he isn’t responsible for Steven. The two have grown closer, sure, but he’s not his guardian and the kid is sixteen years old now; even if Lars is technically older. He’s not there to lecture the boy, not when he isn’t exactly the best role model out of everyone they know.
But whenever he sees Steven, he knows something is up. He’s known him long enough and is aware that the half-gem looks after other people more than he does it for himself. Lars tries to call him out on that, yet never to the point of forcing him to change; he just… lets him know it’s not healthy. Of course, Steven doesn’t seem to listen.
Regardless, he tries to be chill about it, really. Lars doesn’t refuse Steven’s presence – he enjoys spending time with the other boy. Sometimes they would bake together or hang out at Spacetries along with the Off Colors; or even go to Sadie’s concerts when Steven is available.
They haven’t been meeting one another too often, not with Steven shifting between Original Homeworld and Little Homeworld, anyway. When they do, Lars is quick to find dark bags under the other’s eyes, not to mention grumpiness. Steven has become a lot… less nice when you compare him to his fourteen-year-old self. Not that Lars can blame him. What does get on his nerves, though, is how Steven dismisses his exhaustion. How he still insists on helping others and not give himself a freaking rest. Apparently, the gems don’t even appear to notice. Or, they do, yet they assume the sixteen-year-old is just in a phase that will be over soon; except it goes on, and on and nobody does anything. Lars himself doesn’t.
And he’s done.
This time, Steven looks the definition of awful; he’s surprised the boy could even stand up today, though Lars’ connection to Lion makes it a lot easier for him to come over. Today the pink teenager is home after taking care of the bakery in the morning, and the Off Colors have decided to be on their own, so they might be greeting the other gems in Funland or even Peridot and Lapis. Thus, it’s just Lars and Steven today.
“Heyyy,” The sixteen-year-old greets him, sounding even more awful.
Lars doesn’t ignore that, so he replies, not necessarily surprised, “Jesus, you look terrible.”
“Oh, I’m fine…” Steven doesn’t try to argue much as he sits on the kitchen chair. “So, what have you been doing?”
“Nothing. And don’t change the subject – when’s the last time you slept?”
“Well, today!” Steven sounds confident at first, but as Lars glares at him, the façade breaks a little. “… maybe, uh, 4 AM or something?”
The other sighs. “You could’ve gone to bed instead of coming here, y’know.”
“But I wanted to come over! I like spending time with you.”
“I do, too, but I don’t like seeing you in that state.”
“I’m okay, Lars, don’t sweat it.”
“Yeah, sure, you’re even convincing yourself of that,” Lars mutters under his breath, aggressively drying the dishes.
“Where are the Off Colors?” Steven asks, once again changing the subject.
“Enjoying their day off,” Lars replies anyway. “I’m pretty sure Peridot called them for a Camp Pining Hearts meeting again.”
Steven snorts. “She… She sure knows how to convert people.”
Lars almost laughs, if it wasn’t for the growing tiredness coming from his friend. He puts the plate back to the sink and states, “Steven, you should go home and rest.”
“Oh no, I’m not tired.”
“Try again.”
“I mean it, it’s- it’s nothing much. Same routine, gems asking for stuff, adapting to Earth and all the changes… I’m perfectly not tired.”
“Have you even looked at yourself?”
“Yeah,” Steven shrugs. “There’s nothing unusual.”
“That’s because you’re always looking like death, and that’s not okay, Steven!” The older raises his voice.
“Well, then YOU try having the gems ask you a thousand things, like heal them, teach them stuff, fix things, and whatnot!” Steven responds in the same tone. “Or- Or learn even more horrible things your mom did and left behind for you to deal with!”
Lars finds himself silent. The sixteen-year-old is clearly under a lot of pressure and losing patience won’t help anything. For once, Steven’s façade fully ruptures, and he lowers his head in shame.
“I-I’m sorry. I…” He even tries to explain it. “Look, I’m fine—"
“Steven, I swear to God I’m going to throw a cup at your face if you say that again,” He interrupts, but tries not to sound angry like before; though there is a little plastic cup near Lars’ hand, awaiting in the counter… just in case.
The other doesn’t try to mask it anymore. Steven looks… miserable now. He leans against the table, burying his face against his arms.
“Its just… I’m trying, you know?” He raises his head a little. “I’m trying to do everything and- and I’m also trying not to exhaust myself, but it’s hard!”
Something in Lars aches when he realizes that Steven’s eyes are growing deep.
“I—” He tries to dry his tears. “I don’t know what to do. A-And I don’t really have anywhere else to go. Home just- feels too overwhelming sometimes. The gems are always asking me stuff, even if they try to tell me ‘hey, it’s okay to take a rest” but they also mean ‘you have this, this and that to do anyway’! So I can’t even sleep right, because I keep thinking about everything I have to do in the next day, or I remember stuff from the past, and- and sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night and I can’t sleep anymore! I- I can’t…”
Jesus, it’s… the kid is too overwhelmed. Sure, Lars has always been aware, he just… never heard it with so much intensity. Steven bottles it up far more than he wants to admit.
“I-I just want not to think about… anything. But I don’t know how.” His voice breaks and he hides his face again.
Lars doesn’t… quite know what to say. He wants to have an answer, other than telling the gems about it. From what it looks like, Steven is clearly trying to balance his responsibilities and his rest, but he shows obvious signs of anxiety. Lars is no stranger to those feelings, despite not having as much on his plate as Steven does on a daily basis.
He knows better than to tell it’s going to be over. It’s… not. Lars himself can’t even sleep the same way anymore. He has to be absolutely at peace in order to do so. Most nights he’s wide awake, so he’s grown used to it. Even then, Steven isn’t a pink zombie or anything, and he needs rest.
Just like that, Lars doesn’t say anything. Instead, he goes to where Steven is sitting and places a hand on the latter’s shoulder, proceeding to rub his arm gently. At some point the crying boy raises his head and… catches Lars by surprise when he wraps his arms around him, and cries on his shoulder. The older returns it with a little sigh, as he caresses the back of his head, fingers touching Steven’s black, curly hair. In the meantime, Steven can’t breathe with the nonstop sobbing, so Lars breathes in and out very slowly for him to follow.
Fortunately, he does. Steven quiets down to trembling breaths, but it’s a good sign he’s calmed down. Neither let each other go just yet (Steven is much less willing to, for that matter), so Lars keeps soothing him until he feels the younger leaning more against him, and thus becoming heavier in his hold.
With that in mind, Lars takes a deep breath and somehow manages to lift Steven from the chair. It then hits him just how much the other has grown.
“H-Hey, what are you-?” Steven realizes what’s going on. “Put me down!”
“Nope. You’re getting some rest.”
“But I told you I can’t sleep!”
“I didn’t say sleep, I said rest. Those are different things.”
“Still, you don’t have to carry me! I’m sixteen!”
“You're done moving for today."
Steven groans but doesn’t protest anymore; Lars can even hear him pouting, and a small part of him finds that amusing.
They reach the living room and then Lars places him on the couch, grabbing one of the pillows and putting it under Steven’s head.
“Try to stand still, okay?” He asks. “You want me to turn on the TV?”
“No, I’m fine.”
“Well, I’m leaving the remote near you if you change your mind.” He puts the object by the armrest. “I’m, uh, I’m gonna bake some cookies.”
“Oh? You sure you won’t need help?” Steven is almost standing up when Lars grabs the nearest blanket (which he left in the living room last night, having taken a little nap whilst watching TV with his parents) and wraps him up.
“No, because you’ll stay right here and respect your body. Don’t try sneaking out, you little rebel.” He tries to sound menacing, but not serious all at same.
Steven grunts, while finding comfort in the blanket. “Ugh, I miss it when you were a cool space pirate. Now you just sound like a mom.”
Lars snorts. “Hey, I’m still cool – I just worry about some stubborn little punk who needs to be taken care of.”
The younger rolls his eyes. “Okay, fine, that’s… that’s cool of you.”
“That’s right. Now you wait here because the cookies await me. Call me if you need anything, alright?”
Steven lets out a little, relaxed breath. “Okay.”
Hopefully, the kid is going to obey him, so Lars heads to the kitchen and does his thing. Eventually Steven ends up turning on the TV, having become bored at best. By the time he’s finished, they’re both at the living room, watching the crying cartoon characters Steven used to obsess over (it still airs on TV, much to his surprise) and eating the cookies. In one of the episodes, the croissant overworks itself until it cries out its anguishes on its own when the other breakfast friends arrive and comfort it.
At that, Lars looks over at the other boy and speaks up, “Hey, uh, whenever you need to talk about these things, you can trust me, okay?”
“Oh, of course.”
“Like, yeah, you could talk to your moms, but if it's like today, well... I may not have all answers or know how to solve your problems, but… I can listen.”
Steven smiles. “Yeah… I’d like that. Thanks, Lars.”
Lars grins in return, and the younger leans against his shoulder. So, the two watch the Crying Breakfast Friends until Steven, eventually, falls asleep. And if Lars tucks him in and turns off the TV while he goes to the kitchen again, he says nothing.
Who would have known he would grow to care so much about that kid?
