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“I could not possibly care less,” Lassie said, ignoring Shawn which was practically impossible to do. But he was putting up a valiant effort, typing nonsense into his computer all determined like that he’d probably erase once he left.
“But you do. You care so much. You’re like a care bear, and the picture on your fluffy tummy would be a badge, or a smoking gun, or something equally you.” Shawn said, hopping up on the corner of his desk. But Lassie didn’t even look at him.
Shawn could see the tension in the line of his shoulders, the wrinkle in the bow of his brows. Lassie was strung tighter than a ukulele in the hands of a twist happy orangutan.
“Come on, Lassie. What’s up? What’s got your boxers in a bunch?”
“None of your business, Spencer,” Lassie said, typing harder. Lassie needed some coffee, or tea, or a nice scotch. Next time, he’ll fill that piggy bank shaped flask that Shawn got him.
“I’m not sure about that.” His foot was starting a little, not so sneaky, journey up Lassie’s leg. “I think it's exactly my business.”
“Cut it out.”
“The foot or the talking.” Shawn snarked but he didn’t even get a reply. “Come on, man.Talk to me, what’s wrong?”
“Not here, Shawn.” Lassie said quietly, slapping his shin.
Joking Lassie wasn’t here at the moment, leave a message after the beep. At the moment, he was stuck with stoic but secretly antsy Detective Lassiter. He was lucky Shawn’s ‘ninja reflexes’ didn’t kick in and kick him the little Lassiters.
“Then where?” He kept his voice down, looking around, making sure no one overhead. They wouldn’t want that to happen, now would they? No siree. It’s not like they’ve been going out for 5-ever.
“Come by my place later,” He didn’t say it like one but it was a question.
“Food?” It didn’t sound like a yes but it was.
“Takeout Chinese okay with you?”
“As long as you get those crunchy things,” He said, hopping off the desk.
“Eight o’clock,” Lassie said, giving him a look, grabbing his folder, and strutting off with his manly detective self.
🍍🍍🍍
With no case and nothing on his nonexistent to do list, Shawn had plenty of time to think. Then think some more. And then overthink. And then overthink overthinking. His imagination ran marathons. Active was an understatement and it was trying to set a record today.
By the time he rolled up to Lassie’s place, he’d lathered himself into quite a bubbly mess of anxiety. He hoped Lassie didn’t see him hesitate, psyching himself up, pun intended to get off his motorcycle and go inside.
He walked up to the door with sweat practically coming out his ears, willingly into doom. Unlocking the door with the key he swiped a while back, that Lassie didn’t bother taking back, he took a deep breath. He’d probably be giving it back before he left, if he was right.
Relaxed, chill Lassie was back. The top few buttons were undone. Humming and unpacking a bag of takeout, Lassie was moseying around the kitchen.
“Hey, Lassie face!” He said, rounding the corner and pecking him on the cheek before he knew what hit him, stealing the crunchy curly things from under his nose.
“Just in time. Delivery kid just left. If you weren’t coming over, I would’ve taken that scoundrel in. He reeked of marijuana. He wasn’t high but I have no doubt in my mind that if I’d searched him, I could’ve charged him with possession.”
“Well, I’m glad you didn’t. What’d you get? White or fried rice?”
“I wasn’t sure what you wanted so I got both.” Lassie said, crumbling up the bag and pitching it into the can.
“Score! Aww, you trying to sweeten me up? You treat me right, babe.” Shawn smiled, but the little monster in the back of his mind was babbling and just wanted to get this over with if it was gonna happen. “Do you want to talk before or after we eat?”
“We’re getting right into it, then?” Lassie ran a hand through his hair like an irritated husband in one of those sexist sitcoms, or like Danny Zuko.
“You’re the one that wouldn’t talk about it earlier.” Shawn shrugged, opening up a few heaping containers, sending some mouthwatering smells into the air.
“Fine, let’s talk.” Lassie said, pulling the lo mein over to him.
“Before or after food?”
“Before, if that’s okay with you,” Lassie said, giving him a look. “You okay?”
“So you’re not breaking up with me?” ‘Oh, what a relief it is.’ The knots that have been tangling up all day in his stomach loosed up and suddenly he was starving.
“What?” Looking around like he was on a prank show - which, come to think about it, Shawn would pay good money to see - Lassie looked utterly confused. He’d have to look into how to sign up for one of those shows. Maybe for April Fools day. He could DIY it. He made a note to self to figure that out later. “Why would I break up with you?”
“Exactly!” He scooped a heaping pile of orange chicken onto his plate. “I’m a fun guy. I make a mean mac and cheese. Like, downright evil mac and cheese. And I know everything there is to know about Ben and Jerry’s. What else is there? I’m the full package. But the fact that we’re having dinner after means we’re still gonna be together, so I’m not worried anymore.”
“Why were you worried in the first place? Is this not going well?”
“This is going great. We go together like cheese and pepperoni, Lass. Like Sandy and Danny, I’m Sandy by the way. I’m in this. I just spiraled, a little, after you didn't tell me what was up. Lassie Pants, I’m in this.”
“Me too. That’s, kind of, what I wanted to talk to you about.”
“What? Pizza? Grease?”
“No, you and me.” Lassie held his gaze for a moment but when Shawn didn’t say anything, he busied himself, in that nervous way he does, fidgeting adorably, pretending to clean a speck off the counter. “The precinct wasn’t the place for it and I had to get it all sorted in my head.”
“Are you ready to talk about it?”
“Yeah, yeah.” Lassie half smiled.
“Well, here we are.” Shawn said, coming around the counter, putting his plate down on the counter. Suddenly the delicious dinner wasn’t very important anymore.
“We haven’t talked about what this is, and I’d like to.”
“Okay, me too. Let’s go,” Shawn smiled, taking his hand, which Lassie held tight.
“Are we exclusive?” His tone was interrogation, direct and no nonsense, but his face was open, conversational.
“Are you seeing other people?”
“No,” Lassie blushed. “I haven’t been with anyone else since we got together, and I don’t plan on being with anyone else.”
“Me too. That’s what I want too.”
“So we’re exclusive?”
“If that’s fine with you.”
“Second, I know that we’ve been keeping this just between us but I want to come out at the station.”
“Really?” Shawn didn’t see this coming and that was rare. Lassie was a hella private person. He still didn’t know officially how many siblings he had. Letting an entire precinct of coworkers know that he’s dating the fabulous sidekick that he’d been bickering with for years was something out there.
“We don’t have to if you’re not okay with it.” Lassie said, not meeting his eyes again. “I’ve been thinking about it and I know that there can be problems down the line but I value this, this relationship. I want to let people know that we’re together.”
Lassie was never good at talking about his feelings but the way he said it was downright eloquent.
“Have I told you how adorable you are lately?” Shawn said, squeezing his hand.
“No, you haven’t, unfortunately.'' Lassie smiled, getting redder by the second.
“Well, now I get to tell everyone, all the time. Don’t think I won’t. I officially have the most adorable boyfriend and everybody has to know. I’m sorry, I don’t make the rules.”
“Who makes the rules, again?” Lassie said, pulling him closer.
“Shouldn’t you know, Mr. Detective? How about you tell me.”
“I’ll look into it and get back to you.”
“Anything else?”
“That’s it.”
“We’re all good? No curveball you want to throw at me?”
“Nothing else, other than I’m eating most of the Lo Mein.”
“Over my drop dead gorgeous body.” Shawn purred, giving him a quick kiss and then lunging for the carton when Lassie was distracted.
“Like hell you are.” Lassie countered by taking the fried rice and holding it out of reach.
Serving up food went on like that, a mess of trades and strategy, until all of it was doled out in weird, uneven portions. Lassie sat down on the couch and Shawn scooched right next to him.
“How are we going to let people know?” Lassie asked, spinning some lo mein around his fork.
“Boy, do I have some ideas.” His imagination was at it again and the best plan so far involved airhorns, confetti, and a chocolate fountain. Lassie groaned, hiding his face in Shawn’s neck. “It’s your fault you fell for me, Lassie.”
“Sucks for me.” Lassie smirked, giving him a peck on the cheek.