Work Text:
Fandom: DBH
Prompt: “Shh, stop fussing, I’m just braiding your hair.”
It was Alice’s idea so of course, they all agreed pretty much instantly.
Luther carries Alice on his shoulders into the living room where they’ve set up all the couches, chairs, and pillows they could find in front of the TV. The Jericho siblings—Alice thinks that’s what they’ve decided to call themselves—sprawl across the pillows in front. Markus and Simon shield each other from the halfhearted pillow fight North and Josh have, even though Alice is pretty sure they’re just having one of their normal silly arguments with pillows.
Kara and Hank come in from the kitchen, carrying big bowls of popcorn and pretzels. Connor follows with a stack of napkins and a trailing Sumo.
“Sumo!” North abandons the pillow and makes grabby hands toward the dog. “Get over here!”
“Hey! Sumo’s mine!”
“He likes me better,” North declares as Connor pouts, the dog snuffling into her lap with a contented borf.
“He does not.”
Alice giggles when Connor plops himself down next to North, proceeding to cuddle Sumo as best he can. North shoves his shoulder gently so they can maneuver enough for Sumo to lie down properly on top of them. Hank shakes his head at the sight.
“You’re spoiling him.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
“Our bodies are fully capable of bearing the weight, Hank.”
“Yeah, yours.” Hank gestures to the happily panting dog. “If he gets the idea that he can do that to you, he’s gonna want to do it to me and I’m way too old for that.”
“We’ll make sure he doesn’t.”
“By hugging him half to death?”
North cups Sumo’s cheeks in her hands and turns them both to face Hank. “Does he look like he’s suffering to you?”
“So what are we watching?” Luther asks, lowering Alice to the sofa next to Kara.
“The Emperor’s New Groove,” Simon says, letting Alice give him a quick hug, “per the little one’s request.”
Markus takes a handful of pretzels and places them in his lap. “Is that the one with the llama?”
“Llama?” Josh tosses a napkin to Hank. “Did you just say llama?”
“Yeah,” Hank says, pressing ‘play,’ “there’s a llama. Now all of you shut your traps.”
That doesn’t last long.
“Oh, yep, Josh, there’s your llama.”
“He looks so sad, ra9.”
“Aww, he’s a baby!”
“That’s one spoiled kid.”
“Wait, why didn’t he just go through the door that was already there?”
“‘Cause he’s a jerk, that’s why.”
“Ew, is that broccoli?”
“Broccoli’s good for you.”
“He’s got his own theme song guy?”
“I think it’s a reference to—“
“You kids, I swear to God—“
Alice giggles. This is partly why she wanted everyone here to watch it with her. Connor’s innocent contributions about references she probably won’t understand and Hank’s growing fond exasperation is perfect. Markus and Simon have their heads on each other’s shoulders, one of Simon’s arms slung around North’s. Josh has his back against Hank’s chair and is the only one who hasn’t said anything yet, preferring to watch the movie and occasionally the reactions of his friends. Sumo’s asleep.
“Personally,” Luther murmurs when Pacha shows up, “I think the golden palace is a bit much.”
“And the two-toned body paint looks so time-consuming,” Kara agrees.
Alice tilts her head to the side. “How did they get the circles so perfect?”
“I don’t know.”
As Yzma comes on screen, Alice leaves the cradle of Kara’s arms and crawls down to the floor. Markus glances down and sees her hopeful little face, opening his arm and letting her crawl into his lap. Simon lays a hand on her knee, stroking it gently.
“I think she’s rocking the purple cape,” he mutters, “don’t you, Alice?”
Alice nods. “She looks like a queen.”
“Not a queen,” Markus corrects, laughing, “an Empress.”
“Hah!” The figure on the screen leans forward, snarling at the poor person who just wanted some food, Alice thinks, “you really should have thought of that before you became peasants!”
“That is,” Connor says, “absolutely not how that works.”
North snorts. “Tell me about it.”
Alice giggles when Kronk shows up, trying to catch the snack Kuzco throws by belly-flopping off the podium. “I like Kronk.”
“He’s worse at catching snacks than Sumo.”
Hanks snorts at Connor’s statement. “Pretty much everything’s worse at catching snacks than Sumo.”
There’s a melancholy silence that falls when Kuzco talks about ‘Kuzcotopia,’ and Pacha finds out he’s gonna lose his home.
“He should say something to that stuck-up kid,” North mutters as Alice moves to lean against her side, “shouldn’t he, Alice?”
“No,” Alice says, “he doesn’t have to. Kuzco gets it eventually.”
“Good.”
Everyone perks back up when it comes time for Alice’s favorite part. They all quote the lines in time with the movie.
“Pull the lever, Kronk!”
“Wrong lever!”
“Why do we even have that lever?”
Everyone’s laughing by the time it’s over. Hank leans down to nudge Connor’s shoulder. “Can you imagine if you had to get to the Cyberlife warehouse on a roller coaster?”
“It would’ve made getting all the deviants out much more difficult.”
Yzma’s plan is brilliant, hilarious, and super convoluted.
“Okay,” Simon says, “but why does this sound like our plan to infiltrate Stratford Tower?”
“Because it was also ridiculous except it worked.”
Alice notices how Markus tightens his grip on Simon when he says that. She takes his hand too and gives it a squeeze.
Alice has seen this movie before. Right now she’s more worried about making sure the second part of her request comes true. Crawling behind North and Connor—and Sumo—she ends up at the foot of Hank’s chair, next to Josh. As Pacha makes the walk back to his village, he slings an arm around her shoulders.
“What do you think you would do,” he whispers, “if someone told you that?”
“I would tell you guys,” Alice says, “because you’d be angry and you’d help me fix it.”
Hank snorts. “Damn right we would.”
Josh helps her up onto Hank’s lap and he wraps her in a hug. When Kuzco finds out he’s a llama and everyone laughs again, she goes back down to nestle on Connor’s other side.
She saw this movie for the first time with Connor. Their favorite part is when Pacha’s family is trying to stop Yzma and Kronk and she wants to be there when that part comes up.
“Oh my god,” North cackles when they see Kuzco’s ‘disguise,’ “that’s even worse than I thought it was going to be.”
“How did they even get him in that?”
“Determination.”
Alice giggles under Connor’s arm. He squeezes her tight. Everyone cheers when Kuzco and Pacha get back together and Kuzco agrees to go back to the palace.
“Here it comes,” Connor murmurs. Alice grins.
“What do you mean the door is stuck? Try jiggling the handle.”
“There is no handle!”
“There’s not?” Pacha’s wife tosses the handle in her hands. “Are you sure?”
“Oh, she’s great,” Markus says with a grin.
“So this is what happens if you leave Kara, Alice, and Luther alone,” Hank says.
Luther just nods.
“Honey, feathers, and she’s a piñata!” Simon claps. “Perfect!”
Well, that’s all Alice wanted to see. She yawns, crawling back up to wrap her arms around Luther and have his help to lie against his chest. As the sequence with all the animal potions begins, much to Josh and Simon’s delight, she closes her eyes, happy that it worked. Her family is all here.
She feels a hand on her head and stirs.
“Shh,” Luther soothes, “stop fussing. I’m just braiding your hair.”
Oh. That’s okay. Alice listens as everyone keeps laughing, keeps making silly comments, keeps being a family.
That’s all she wanted.
As the little purple kitten begrudgingly holds up an acorn, Alice falls asleep with a smile on her face.