Chapter Text
“Take it.”
Adora squinted at her sword, hesitating.
“This is not because I like you,” Catra added quickly. She forced herself to spit the words out of her mouth; she couldn’t even look at Adora when she said them.
Adora took the sword from Catra’s hands and looked at her again. God, every time Adora looked at her, especially now, after everything…
“Catra, I—”
“Just… get out of here.” Catra said. She could not meet Adora’s gaze, not after their torn relationship. Adora may not care anymore, but Catra sure did, and the last thing Catra wanted Adora to see was her vulnerability.
“For the honor of Grayskull!”
Catra shielded her face from Adora’s transformation and used the opportunity to escape unnoticed. Slowly making her way back to her quarters, Catra held her head in her hands, not quite believing what she just did. She knew she wouldn’t get punished for it, thanks to Shadow Weaver’s insistence on taking credit for Catra’s plan. At least, she hoped she wouldn’t.
On the one hand, Catra couldn’t believe she’d let Adora take her powers back, and put the Horde at a considerable disadvantage. However, on the other hand, Catra could believe it, because regardless of the current circumstances, Catra still cared. She still seethed that Adora abandoned her for a group of silly princesses she’s known for barely a few weeks. Catra was her best friend since they were practically born. Catra could never fathom how Adora so carelessly threw their friendship away like it was nothing—like she was nothing. Catra had been feeling a lot of nothing in the weeks since Adora left for Bright Moon, consumed with jealousy over how Adora fit into her new life so flawlessly. Catra was left behind, struggling to pick up her mess. Leaving her alone at the mercy of Shadow Weaver and the Horde.
Catra may have been feeling nothing, but she knew she was strong; she was a survivor. No matter how many times Shadow Weaver pushed her down, Catra would be more determined to rise in the ranks and prove that she was the leader Shadow Weaver craved. She would be the one to finally bring Bright Moon to their knees, and Etheria would ultimately belong to the Horde. Maybe Catra would even feel whole again, showing Adora that she chose the wrong side, that she should have stayed with her from the beginning.
But sometimes, Catra wished that she had gone with Adora when her friend offered. Catra would stay up late at night, unable to sleep, tossing and turning about the what-ifs. Still, Catra would force herself to abandon those thoughts, telling herself this was for the best. She wasn’t meant to be good. She was meant to be strong and powerful. After all, if her best friend, the only person she ever loved (and would always love), felt no regret in leaving her, then Catra knew she didn’t need anybody. She needed power. The Horde ended up being right after all.
But that didn’t stop Catra from secretly wishing that Adora had just stayed. That they could have risen in the ranks in the Horde and overtake Etheria together. Side by side, best friends, and maybe one day, lovers. But there was no hope now, because regardless of Catra’s persistent feelings, Adora and Catra fought each other, rather than together.
And through it all, Catra still loved Adora.