Chapter Text
Some random minion walked past Orochimaru's room and overheard Orochimaru and Kabuto arguing. Apparently they were arguing over Sasuke's training and Orochimaru's health. To the minion they sounded like an old married couple. The way they talked about Sasuke you would think he was their son.
Not that Orochimaru and Kabuto knew this but, a few of the minions who had overheard other previous arguments had started referring to them as "Mommy" and "Daddy". There were still arguments over which one of them was the mommy and which one was the daddy. Most votes were leaning in favor of Orochimaru as Daddy.
The random minion soon came across some of his fellow random and equally unimportant minions. This random minion decided to announce "Guess what!" to which said minion received stares indicating the company would rather the minion just come out and say it already. Getting the hint that nobody planned on guessing the announcement was continued. "Mommy and Daddy are fighting again. It sounds worse than usual this time."
It just so happens that in that same moment Sasuke was heading toward Orochimaru's room. As he was walking past the group of minions he overheard the announcement. "Again!" Sasuke shouted suddenly, startling the collective group of minions. After the initial shock, hearing Sasuke, all heads turned toward him as he started to run off to stop Orochimaru and Kabuto's arguing.
He didn't get very far before he turned around and glared at the minions before him. "Did you hear anything just now?" he questioned a little embarrassed but trying not to show it.
All at once the group of the minions shot up, stood straight, and threw their hands to their sides. Then in perfect synch they all shouted at once without making eye contact, "No sir! We didn't hear you confirm you think of Lord Orochimaru and Kabuto as your parents sir!"
"Good!" Sasuke shouted back nervously. Before he turned to leave Sasuke regained his composure and added "And you better keep quiet" threateningly. He then huffed and stormed off. Must remember to kill them all later before that gets out, Sasuke thought to himself as he got ready to break up yet another argument.
As soon as Sasuke was out of sight, and earshot, one of the random minions blurted out "That was weird".
Another stated, "I knew those two were gay".
A third minion said "Maybe we should of just asked him which one he calls Daddy?"
A fourth minion stared at the third with an annoyed look. "Great idea, then he would've killed us instead of answering".
To their relief Sasuke never did get around to killing them. Instead, much to the Uchiha's embarrassment, Orochimaru held a staff meeting later that day in order to confirm who is Sasuke's "Daddy".