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The sun shone brightly with its luminous rays peeking through the stone architecture that surrounded them...lighting up the sky with brilliant hues of reds, yellows, and oranges. Its warmth might have been appreciated after being confined to darkness for so long.... but it brought Joseph no comfort whatsoever.
Sebastian warily paved the way ahead, currently functioning as the eyes and ears of their two-man operation. It was unusually quiet... and so Joseph, for the time-being, had fallen a few strides behind him, his limbs feeling sluggish and leaden. Since coughing up blood, he truly felt in a bad way. Not only sick in body, but ill down to his very core. He could still taste it... that bitter, metallic tang on the tip of his tongue. But that was far from the worst of it. Even his own thoughts felt as if they were plagued by some disease, enemies and foreign bodies not to be trusted .
In the span of a day, the longest day of his life... or so it seemed, he'd already tried to kill his partner, as well as himself.
He figured it was only a matter of time until he turned, fully and completely and without a fight... giving up his sanity willingly, and then...
Joseph shuddered at the thought, his stomach churning.
Sometimes, he truly wondered how Sebastian dealt with such things and managed to carry on in that outwardly apathetic, stoic manner that he'd grown so accustomed to. His problematic drinking habit could be partially blamed, of course... but Sebastian had always approached the world and its problems head-on.
Lost in thought, Joseph's eyes were trained on the broad, muscled back of his partner, and the bloodstains that spattered all over his pinstriped vest. There was no weary slump to his shoulders, no limp in his step. Perhaps there was a part of him that deep down, wished that he could emulate even the smallest piece of Sebastian...
"Watch your step."
But that simply wasn't him.
Joseph didn't heed the warning in time, catching the tip of his dress shoe on the upturned rubble, where the road beneath their feet was cracked and fractured. He pitched forward, catching himself on a nearby statue of what appeared to be some sort of angel. Joseph looked skyward, glancing at its serene features and praying for forgiveness.
Sebastian turned on a heel as he backtracked a few paces to get to him.
"You okay?"
Though he gave a shallow inhale, his chest feeling heavy, Joseph waved Sebastian off. "I'm fine."
It didn't prevent his partner from clamping a palm over his shoulder, however. Strong, affirming. Everything he felt he wasn't at the moment.
Their darkened gazes met briefly, with Seb offering the faintest of smiles. Once he was certain that Joseph was all right, he gave a nod and began along the path again.
"Actually... wait up."
Leaning against the legs of the statue for support, the words escaped in a huff of breath before he could contain them. It halted Sebastian in his tracks, Joseph's voice just barely carrying across the rather medieval-looking courtyard.
Sebastian spared him a glance over his shoulder. "Hm?"
"I think I... need a minute."
"Are you hurt?" Concern etched lines into Sebastian's rugged features as he observed him intently, quirking an eyebrow as Joseph shook his head.
"Not... on the outside, at least," he said, giving a slight chuckle that faded into another brief coughing fit. His throat was dry, his thoughts a morbid haze, and his lungs felt like they were burning... but he had to get the weight off his chest. "I suppose I was just thinking."
"At a time like this?"
From years of experience, he could tell from Sebastian's scoffing tone that it was only a half-joke. Once the man was on a mission, there was no time for talking of any sort. All business, all the time... unless his tongue was loosened up with liquor. At least, since the accident...
But this was no time to dwell needlessly on how things used to be.
Studying Sebastian's features, Joseph hesitated, carefully crafting his next sentence while the other man waited patiently. When he spoke, the words fumbled awkwardly from his parted lips. Far from how he'd wished to express the doubts that were consuming him... soon to swallow him whole.
"What would you do if I don't make it through this?"
"Joseph!" In an instant, Sebastian's expression had transformed, brow creasing and eyes narrowed. It left no time for the thought to linger, as if he'd spoken in some ancient, evil tongue. It was the closest he'd seen him to looking physically wounded since they'd arrived in this hellish place. "We don't have time for this."
Just like that, Sebastian was striding ahead, unable to look his partner in the eye. What he didn't expect, however, was for Joseph to relinquish his spot against the statue, and muster up the strength to briskly catch up to him.
"Seb," Joseph said softly, taking hold of his arm and giving a firm tug before he could simply walk away. "Please, I need to know."
This time, a few moments of silence passed between them, the weight surely felt. Sebastian paused. Overhead, the sun was obscured by clouds, casting shadows upon their faces as the angel towered over them. Though his grip tightened around the other man's arm, Sebastian pulled away forcibly.
"That's enough, Joseph."
He didn't turn to look at him. Joseph shook his head, mouth agape as he stared. How could he brush it off so easily, when he was unraveling from the inside out? It wasn't enough. It was never enough... and so, that unbridled terror took hold of him, that utter feeling of helplessness, of frustration, of fear. It put the fight back into his heart to replace the chill in his soul, if only momentarily.
"You can't run from it forever, Sebastian," he countered, with new found strength as he spoke to his retreating form. "Sooner or later, you're not going to find anything at the bottom of that flask... so we might as well face it. You and I both know it's a possibility, that at any conceivable moment, either one of us could—“
Before he could finish, Sebastian had turned, closing the distance between them in one smooth step. He took hold of Joseph's shoulders and gave him a firm shake... practically nose to nose with the other man. Expression far from anger, his fingertips pressed in, not roughly enough to hurt him, but not weakly enough to let him go, either.
"I'd keep on going, all right?" Sebastian's teeth were bared as he breathed directly against Joseph's face. "I'd fight. Because it's the right thing to do..."
Limbs feeling heavy and weak once again, Joseph was lost in the intensity of Sebastian's stare. Something strange and subtle passed over his features, the faintest flicker of raw emotion before it disappeared entirely.
"... because you're my partner, and I owe you that much."
Joseph hung his head, his shoulders slumping as Sebastian held onto him. Staring at the ground, he counted the cracks in the foundation beneath them.
"You know, Seb," he started, voice hardly a whisper, "if it were you... I couldn't—"
"I know." Looking up at Sebastian again, Joseph saw that his steely facade had returned. No judgment, no anger, no hint of reprimand. Just Detective Castellanos, as he knew him... and that was enough. "Now, are you ready to move on, or not?"
Palms removed from his shoulders, Sebastian patted Joseph's upper arm, a familiar, and reaffirming, form of intimacy in their partnership that always seemed to bolster his spirits. He didn't feel he deserved it, but he accepted the gesture gratefully.
"Yeah..." Joseph gave a nod. "Yeah, I think I am."
As they carried onwards, rays of sunlight fought through the clouds, highlighting the stone angel that watched over their path. Though he wasn't certain as he stared up into the white light peeking through... a gloved hand raised over his eyes, Joseph could have sworn that she was smiling.