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“I think we should just tell them.” Remus whispered in Sirius’ ear. They were standing in the astronomy tower, leaning against a column and holding each other. Remus had his arms wrapped around Sirius’s waist.
Sirius rested his arms over Remus’s shoulders. He pulled his head back. “That’s really not a good idea.” He spoke softly and leaned in to kiss Remus’ long neck. He didn’t want to have this conversation and ruin such a lovely evening. They had gone for an evening picnic on the lawn and finished the evening up in the tower with a bottle of fire whiskey they had stolen from Professor Slughorn.
“We have to tell them sometime. Why keep putting it off?” Remus pushed. “You know I don’t like keeping secrets. What’s the worst your parents could do?”
“They’d disown me, Moony. It would not go well, I promise. And you kept the fact that you were a werewolf a secret, what makes this so different?” Sirius said, pulling away.
“That’s different. I can’t tell people about that and you know it. I’m just saying, you have the ability to tell your parents about us. I don’t see why you wouldn’t take that opportunity.” Remus said defensively.
“C’mon Moony. Can we not talk about this right now? I want to enjoy this evening with you and I’d rather we didn’t fight.” Sirius said, grabbing Remus’s belt loop and pulling him in close.
“You’re right. I don’t want to ruin this evening,” Remus said smiling and leaning in to kiss Sirius.
All of the sudden there was a loud crash and a flash of black hair went running down the stairs. Sirius and Remus ran to the entrance of the astronomy tower, trying to see the mysterious intruder but he had already gone.
Sirius turned to Remus. “Who do you think it was?” He asked.
“Must have been Severus.” Remus replied. Sirius gave him a look as if to ask him how he knew that. “I can smell him,” said Remus, tapping his nose and Sirius nodded in understanding.
“We better get out of here before he sends a teacher after us.” Remus said turning and smiling at Sirius.
“You’re right. Let’s finish this perfect evening in the dormitory,” Sirius said with a mischievous look. They both headed down the stairwell holding hands and headed toward Gryffindor tower.
---
“And where have you two been?” James asked as the two boys walked into the common room.
“I don’t believe it’s any of your concern,” Remus said with a half smile. He looked toward Sirius and seemed to have a silent conversation with him. James seemed to understand the silence, and he laughed at the two boys. Peter sat in the corner not fully understanding the exchange nor really trying to. He was too focused on the deserts he had brought back from the dining hall.
Sirius and Remus headed up to the dorm together.
“What do you think Snivelly was doing spying on us?” Sirius asked Remus once they were by themselves.
“I don’t know. Maybe he was just in the wrong place at the wrong time?” Remus offered with a shrug.
“Well whatever it was, he can’t get away with it. We have to get him back somehow,” Sirius said with a mischievous grin as he jumped and swiftly landed on Remus’ bed.
“Maybe we should just leave him alone. You know, not give him a reason to come after us,” Remus suggested, moving closer to Sirius.
“Moony, I am not scared of that greasy git. He needs to learn to keep his greasy nose out of our business,” Sirius said with a stern expression that soon fell to a soft grin. “But enough about him. What about us?” He said, raising his eyebrows.
“What about us?” Remus asked cluelessly.
“You still owe me the rest of my evening,” Sirius said with a grin as he reached up and pulled Remus down on top of him.
Remus smiled and relaxed. “That’s right, I do. So what are we waiting for?” He said with a laugh. They looked into each other’s eyes and smiled. They leaned in for a kiss and wrapped their arms around each other. They eventually fell asleep wrapped in each other's arms with the bed curtains closed. James and Peter didn’t even notice them when they came up for bed.
---
The next morning Sirius woke up to find Remus had left for a shower and James was sitting on his bed getting changed for the day. Peter was still sleeping as usual, his bed curtains open. James looked at Peter and then to Sirius and gave a silent laugh as he chucked a pillow at the sleeping boy. Sirius laughed as Peter jumped awake and gave James an evil look. He rolled over and closed the curtains, grabbing his sheets and pulling them over him as he lay back down.
Sirius got out of bed and headed towards the bathroom where Remus was brushing his hair. Sirius walked past him and gave him a cheeky smile on his way to the showers. When Sirius had gotten out of the shower Peter had finally gotten up and James and Remus were ready to head down to breakfast.
They headed down to the great hall together. As they sat eating breakfast Sirius was watching the Slytherin table. “What are you looking at Sirius?” James asked him, trying to follow his eyes to where he was looking.
“Look at him over there,” Sirius said with disdain.
“Look at who? There’s so many people over there,” James said, confused.
“Snivellus,” Sirius replied with disdain. “He’s up to something I can tell. I just don’t know what it is yet,” he said, narrowing his eyes.
James looked over to see Severus talking to another Slytherin and occasionally looking over at the four Gryffindors. “How do you know he’s planning something?” James asked Sirius, nudging him in his side.
“Because he was spying on me and Remus last night in the astronomy tower. What else could he be doing?” Sirius said with a stern expression. Thinking about it made him angry. He just wanted to have a peaceful night with Remus and the Slytherin had been trying to ruin it. At least Sirius thought he was.
“Hmm. Maybe we should figure out what it is before he can do anything,” James said with an evil grin.
Sirius looked at him and smiled. “Yes, maybe we should.” The two looked at each other with matching mischievous looks.
“I don’t like where this is going,” Remus said with a disapproving glance.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about Remus. Do you, Sirius?” James asked with a wide grin.
“No James, I don’t,” he said matching his smile.
At that moment, the post arrived. A black owl flew low over the Gryffindor table and headed straight towards Sirius. It dropped a letter with neat writing in front of the young boy and promptly flew off. Sirius opened the letter and began reading to himself as his friends watched on with anticipation. Once Sirius had finished the letter he folded it back up and put it in his robe pocket. His face had gone completely white and he was staring at Remus.
“What did it say?” James asked impatiently. Remus looked at him to see what the wizard had to say.
When Sirius didn’t answer Remus spoke up. “Sirius, is everything alright?” he asked with concern. Sirius stared at Remus without blinking. Remus stared back, trying to read the expression on Sirius’ face.
“We need to talk. Privately,” he said with a hoarse voice. Remus saw the concern in Sirius’ eyes and promptly nodded his head, not wanting to push the subject any more in front of the other two boys. James wasn’t happy with that answer as he turned to stare at Remus, trying to figure out what the other wizard hadn’t said.
Before James could say anything else though Sirius and Remus had promptly stood up and were heading toward the door of the great hall. James was still confused, but decided not to try and push the matter further. He continued eating while the other two headed towards the front door of the school.
Remus looked at Sirius with concern. “Sirius, what’s going on? I’ve never seen you like this, you look as if you’ve seen a ghost. Talk to me.” He pushed patiently.
Sirius looked at Remus and pulled out the letter. He handed it to Remus and allowed him a few moments to read it.
I hope you enjoyed it while it lasted. Your family knows that you’re in love with a filthy half-blood. Enjoy your holidays.
“I don’t understand,” Remus finally said when he’d finished reading.
“They know Remus. My parents, they know about us,” Sirius said with no color in his face.
“I got that part,” said Remus. “What I don’t understand is who. Who told them about us?” he said, lowering his eyebrows in confusion.
“Oh I can tell you how they know. I can bet it was a no good, hooked nosed, greasy little git,” Sirius said, fuming through clenched teeth.
“But how can you know that he did it? You have no proof Sirius. You can’t just go around throwing out accusations like that,” Remus told him.
“C’mon Remus, who else could it have been? James and Peter would never do that and Snivelly is the only other person who might know. He probably saw us together last night and figured he would try to get back at us for all of those pranks by trying to ruin us,” Sirius said, growing more angry.
“But why would he write to your parents. Wouldn’t he rather threaten us than go right to them?” Remus asked reasonably.
“I don’t know Remus but that doesn’t matter right now. What matters is that I don’t know what I’m going to do.” Sirius was getting worried.
“Maybe this is a good thing. Maybe your parents will be accepting of it and we can finally stop hiding away our relationship,” Remus said, putting a hand on Sirius’s shoulder.
“You read the letter Remus. That's not going to happen,” Sirius said, looking glum. “They would never approve of me being with someone that isn’t a pureblood Slytherin. And a bloke no less. I don’t want to face them. Maybe I can stay here for the holidays.” He looked down, not wanting to think about what his parents would say.
“Sirius, you can't avoid your family forever. And besides, they aren’t going to want you staying here after hearing news like that. They are going to want to talk about it,” Remus said.
Sirius nodded, accepting that he was just going to have to get over it and face his parents once and for all.
---
The holidays were a week away and that week seemed to fly by. It wasn’t long until Sirius was hugging his friends goodbye and heading off to join his family.
Sirius stepped next to Regulus and anxiously looked around for his parents. Once he had found them he walked as slowly as he could. His mother and father greeted him. “Sirius, Regulus,” said his mother looking at them.
“Hello mother,” Sirius said. Regulus remained quiet.
“We must be going. We don’t want to be late for dinner. Your father will be meeting us there,” Walburga said.
The two boys nodded and followed their mother to the Floo Network. Once they were home they took their things upstairs and quickly unpacked. By the time they were finished it was time for dinner. They all sat quietly and ate. Sirius was tense. He waited for his parents to say something but they never did.
This seemed to carry on for the entire holiday. Sirius had never felt so stressed in his life. He kept waiting for the storm that was sure to come but it never did. It killed him not to know what his parents were thinking. He would sneak down stairs late at night after everyone had gone to bed. He would stay up late to fire call Remus. It seemed that Remus was the only person who could make him feel better. The week of the full moon Sirius had a hard time accepting that he couldn’t talk to anyone. He knew Remus couldn’t help, nor would he ask him to when he was so worn out from his transformation.
Sirius attended family dinner and large family parties all holiday and he never heard a word from his parents about Remus. He began to wonder if the letter was a ruse and his parents didn’t know at all. It would make sense, he thought. It was a great way to make Sirius suffer the whole holiday, thinking that his parents had found out about him and Remus.
One day, close to the end of the holidays, Sirius’ father was going into Diagon Alley and he allowed Sirius to come with. Sirius was sure that his father was going to confront him about Remus but he never did. While in Diagon Alley, Sirius and Orion ran into James and his father. Sirius and James stepped away from their fathers to talk.
“Moony told me what was going on. Are you okay? Have they said anything?” James asked him.
Sirius was glad to be able to talk to his best friend. “No, they haven’t said a thing. I don’t know how much longer I can keep sitting there waiting for them to say something,” Sirius said, biting his nail. He had ground most of them down to nubs.
“You really need to stop doing that,” James said. “Maybe whoever sent that letter was lying and they didn’t actually sell you out,” James offered.
“That’s what I’ve been wondering. But I still can’t take the not knowing. I’d rather face it now and get it over with than to sit here worrying about it for the rest of the year,” Sirius said.
At that point Sirius’s father came and told him they were heading home and Sirius had to say goodbye to his friend. James gave him a sympathetic nod as he walked off with his father.
---
Christmas came and went and Sirius hadn’t heard anything from his parents. By the last day of the holiday Sirius had enough of worrying and just decided to ask his parents about the letter. It took him awhile to figure out how he should ask about it without giving it away. Once he had finally built up the courage to ask, he headed downstairs to find his parents.
They were in the sitting room. Walburga sitting on a dark emerald velvet sofa, reading a book on blood purity, and Orion sitting in a black leather reading chair, reading an article in the newspaper. Sirius crept into the room and lingered for a moment. When his parents saw him lingering they put down their various readings. “Well, what is it Sirius? You know how we feel about looming,” Walburga said impatiently.
“I was hoping to ask you something if you had a moment,” Sirius said, doing his best to stay respectful.
“We can spare a moment Sirius,” Orion said looking down at him.
“Okay then,” Sirius said. “I received an interesting letter while I was at school. It included a deceitful rumor about me, and claimed that you would be informed. I was curious if you’ve heard anything about the matter? Or if I should presume this lie to be just that,” Sirius said.
“Sirius, we know that you have been spending some time with a half blood if that’s what you’re referring to. You know how we feel about this, that we don’t approve. But if this is a lie, as you’ve said, then there’s nothing for us to worry about, is there Sirius?” Walburga said, not looking at Sirius but back at her book.
“No ma’am, there isn’t. I’ll see to it that these rumors are put to rest,” Sirius said, bowing his head.
“I should hope so, Sirius. We don’t appreciate hearing such accusations made towards the Black family. If you were to do such a thing, it would bring great shame to our name, and you’re much wiser than that, aren’t you? As a Black heir it is your responsibility to surround yourself with worthy purebloods. It’s bad enough that you were placed in Gryffindor, Sirius, but we still expect you to hold up our family values,” Orion said, looking at Sirius with a stern expression.
“Yes sir,” Sirius said, standing up straight.
Sirius knew that the conversation was over. He trudged back up the stairs to pack his things before he went back to school. He didn’t know what he was going to do. He loved Remus and he could never cut him out of his life, but at the same time, he worried about what his parents would do if he disobeyed them. He had tried his best to be a good, respectful child. His parents already didn’t support his house placement, but if they knew he was in love with a half blood boy and a werewolf no doubt, he couldn’t even imagine what his parents would do. He didn’t want to think about it.
Sirius lay in bed that night rethinking everything that had happened over and over again in his head. He didn’t know what to do.
He eventually fell asleep.
---
The next morning Sirius woke up with a headache. He was still thinking about the events of the previous night. All the way to King’s Cross Sirius could not get out of his head. It wasn’t until James nudged his side that he realized he was with his friends on the train.
“What’s got you so spaced?” James asked with a laugh.
“Oh nothing,” Sirius responded. He didn’t want to bring up the situation because he still didn’t know what to do. He couldn’t break up with Remus but he couldn’t ignore the situation either. Eventually his parents would find out that he had directly disobeyed them. He decided to pull Remus aside later and make a plan.
The ride to Hogwarts was pretty typical. They filled themselves with sweets and candies until they couldn’t any longer and they played games the whole way. When they finally arrived at the school the four boys were among the last students off the train.
They headed to the great hall for dinner. As they were walking Remus drifted back and held Sirius back as well. James looked back at them to see where they had gone. Remus gestured for him to keep going. “We’ll catch up with you in a minute. Go eat,” he said. James nodded and headed off with Peter.
Sirius looked at Remus. “What’s going on, Moony?” he asked.
“I don’t know, you tell me. You’ve been acting weird and you’ve been quiet the whole way here. What’s going on? Did something happen?” Remus pushed.
“I was planning on telling you when we had a chance,” Sirius said. “It’s my parents. They did find out about us. I managed to convince them that the letter was a lie. But Remus, they made it very clear that you and I could not be friends,” Sirius said with a sad expression. “And I can’t do that. I don’t know what I would do without you.”
“Oh Sirius. I’m so sorry,” Remus said wrapping his arms around Sirius and pulling him in. “We can figure something out. I know we can. We’ll just have to be super careful about who sees us together. We’ll have to stay very secretive for now. We can’t be going out in public together for a while,” Remus said.
“I don’t think I could do that. That would mean that we can’t spend any time together with the group unless we were alone somewhere. I couldn’t talk to you at all in public. I don’t think I could do that Remus, it would kill me,” Sirius said sadly, trying to hold back his tears.
“It’s the only choice we have, Sirius. If your parents are serious about it, then we must be as well. We can do it, I have confidence in us,” Remus said wrapping his hand over and brushing his fingers through Sirius’s hair. He looked around to make sure they were alone before leaning in to kiss Sirius. They stayed in this embrace for some time before letting go and heading into the school.
Once they had rejoined their friends Sirius and Remus told them about their plan. The other boys listened and agreed with Remus. They vowed to do all they could to help the two not be caught.
---
The next couple weeks were extremely difficult for Sirius. He never felt so lonely as he was not able to touch Remus or even talk to him out in the hallways and during classes. They made sure to be extra distant around Severus. For the moment, the plan seemed to be working.
Sirius and Remus spent most nights together just cuddling and catching up on each other’s day. It was becoming increasingly difficult to keep their distance. They had gotten careless on a few occasions. They feared Severus had caught them when they saw him watching them, as they held hands underneath the table one day at dinner. They immediately let go and looked away from each other, not talking again until that evening.They assumed they had gotten away with it when they had gone a few weeks without hearing anything about it.
It was quickly becoming time for the next full moon. The night before, the four boys sat in their dorm making their monthly plan. Remus was laying on his bed. He usually felt pretty crappy the days before and following a full moon and the boys did whatever they could to help him feel better. They had planned to finish classes and skip dinner to go to the shrieking shack with Remus. They’d eat an extra large lunch that day to hold them over the rest of the night.
They all went to bed early to make sure they had plenty of energy for the next day.
The next morning when they woke up Remus was nowhere to be found. The boys eventually stopped looking and went down for breakfast hoping to see him there but he wasn’t.
“Maybe he’s just skipping breakfast and we’ll see him in class,” James said, shrugging.
“I don’t know. This isn’t like him,” Sirius said. “I hope everything’s all right.”
“I’m sure he’s fine. He probably just needed some time to himself,” Peter said through a mouthful of eggs.
“I guess we’ll find out,” Sirius said. He pushed his food around his plate but he couldn’t bring himself to eat it, he was too worried about Remus.
The boys finished breakfast and headed off to classes. They hadn’t seen Remus all day and Sirius was starting to really get worried.
“This isn’t like him. I don’t like this,” Sirius said to James and Peter as they finished returning their things to the dorm.
“Me neither.” James said. “We should head to the shack and see what’s going on. I’m sure he’ll be there by now.”
The boys nodded in agreement and headed out.
They reached the shack and went in to look for Remus. He was sitting in a corner hunched over.
“Remus? Are you alright?” James asked walking closer.
Remus didn’t respond. His eyes were glassy and he wasn’t reacting to any of them. It was at that moment when Remus started transforming. His arms began to grow hairy, his legs grew longer and more wolf-like, and his face grew longer, emerging as a snout.
James, Sirius, and Peter looked at each other and nodded. They all started to transform into their various animagi. There was no point staying human now. They’d be safer as animals with Remus than as humans.
Peter turned into a rat and scurried off underneath the bed in the room. James turned into a stag and Sirius a dog. By then Remus had finished transforming and was turning toward the two with a growl. His gaze settled on Sirius and he bared his teeth. Sirius was trying to read Remus but he couldn’t. He had a bad feeling.
Remus instantly lunged at Sirius and he took off running. Remus chased after him and James wasn’t too far behind them.
Sirius ran out of the shack and headed for the forbidden forest. Remus was right behind him. He was growling and reaching for Sirius’s leg. He was too fast, Sirius was having a hard time outrunning him. James was looking for a way to distract Remus but he was so focused on Sirius.
Remus lunged forward and grabbed Sirius’s leg in his mouth. The dog yelped in pain and he was thrown down. Remus let go and stood over Sirius. He tried to get up and run but his leg gave out beneath him. He cried out again. The stag ran between them and waved his antlers to threaten the werewolf to back down. He clawed James and easily threw him aside. He hit a tree and was down.
Sirius howled out but James didn’t respond. He could see the stag trying to get up, he looked to be dazed and he was struggling to stay on his feet.
Remus snarled and raked his claws across the dog’s chest. He cried out and rolled over. Remus grabbed him by the neck, digging his claws in and threw him across the woods. Sirius landed in the dirt and slid a decent way away. He tried to lift his head but it hurt too much. Out of the corner of his eye he could see the stag get up and try to block Remus again. Remus stood up and looked at James. The stag threw his large antlers towards the werewolf, scaring him enough to back off. After a couple seconds he frantically shook his head. It looked as though he was trying to shake something off. Then, he quickly turned and ran off further into the woods.
James hurried over to the wounded dog.
He was in pain. Everything hurt and he was quickly growing tired. He felt himself shift back into a human, too tired to hold his animagus form. He saw James transform as well.
“Sirius hold on I got you,” he said frantically turning Sirius onto his back and examining his wounds.
“H….how b..bad is i..it?” Sirius tiredly asked. He was breathing hard and he was starting to go numb. His vision started to get blurry.
“I’m not going to lie, Sirius it’s bad. You need to stay awake,” James looked scared.
“O...okay. I’ll t...try…” Sirius stuttered. He tried to stay awake. He could hear James yelling at him to stay awake but he couldn’t hang on any longer. He drifted off.
“No Sirius!” James called, shaking him.
James picked Sirius up, holding him in his arms and started running toward the school. He knew he couldn’t get Sirius there fast enough so he headed to Hagrid’s hut, where a bright light was shining through the window.
“Hagrid!” he called over and over at the top of his lungs as he approached the stone hut. The door opened and the half giant stepped out.
“What’s all the noise out here?” he asked. His eyes opened wide when he saw James carrying Sirius, covered in blood. “James? What happened?” he asked ushering them in and grabbing a handful of floo.
“No time, Hagrid! We need to get him to the hospital wing,” James said, stepping into the fireplace. He nodded and Hagrid threw the powder down at James’ feet. “Hogwarts hospital wing!” he shouted. He fell away in a flash of green and instantly stepped out in the hospital wing. Hagrid wasn’t far behind them.
“Help!” James called running in. Madam Pomfery came running out of her office when she heard the commotion. She saw Sirius and immediately started preparing a station to work at.
“Put him on the bed. Quickly quickly,” she said, pulling a bed over. James quickly put Sirius down and stepped back to get out of Pomfrey’s way. She turned to Hagrid. “Get the headmaster quickly,” she told him. He nodded and rushed out as fast as he could.
Pomfrey closed the curtain around Sirius’s bed. James turned to go back out to the forest. “Not so fast, Mr. Potter,” Madam Pomfrey called from behind the curtain. How did she even know he was leaving? “You have wounds that need to be tended. Sit on that bed and I'll be with you as soon as I get Mr. Black taken care of,” she said.
He knew better than to argue with her. He was extremely dizzy and in some pain. He sat on the bed and thought about where Remus might be.
A couple minutes later Professor Dumbledore came rushing in, followed closely by Hagrid. He gave James a look as he went past and into where Pomfrey was working on Sirius. “Poppy. What happened?” he urged.
“That is a question better suited for Mr. Potter over there. He brought the boy in like this,” she said. “It is a full moon this evening so I’d guess that it has something to do with Mr. Lupin. These injuries do look consistent with an animal attack,” she said, sounding frantic. “I must find all the bleeding and get it under control if he’s to have any chance. We can go over details later, when he’s stable,” she said and ushered Dumbledore and Hagrid out of the room.
“James. Tell me what happened this evening,” Dumbledore came out and sat next to the boy.
“No one could have seen it coming, Professor. He’s never been like this before, I swear,” James rushed to say.
“It’s alright James. But you need to tell me everything that happened,” Dumbledore reassured him.
“Well, we hadn’t seen Remus all day and we thought maybe he was just having a rough day. Well, more rough than usual. We assumed he had headed to the shack early so we headed over there during dinner time. When we got there he was acting weird. It was like he wasn’t there. He was huddled in the corner and his eyes seemed to be glazed over. We tried to talk to him but then all of the sudden he transformed. So we did too and he went after Sirius. It was like he was trying to just hurt him. After he did that he took off the other direction. I think I saw Peter follow after him but I’m not sure, I was so focused on Sirius,” James recalled the events.
“If he was just going after Sirius, how did you get to be like that?” Dumbledore said, gesturing to James’s injuries.
“I tried to stop him, Professor. He was crazy, going after Sirius like that. So I put myself between them and he threw me into a tree,” James said. He had a headache and he could feel the left side of his face rapidly swelling. He was pretty sure he’d broken a leg and many ribs. He wasn’t even sure how he made it all the way back, it must have been adrenaline, he thought to himself.
“Okay. We’ll be coming back to ask more questions. For now try to relax and Madam Pomfrey will be in shortly to attend to you,” Dumbledore said standing up and walking away. James nodded and leaned back on the bed. He wished he could go back out and see what the deal was with Remus.
Madam Pomfrey spent a while with Sirius. It seemed to take forever but she finally came out looking exhausted. James looked at her with a worried look.
“He’ll be fine. He will have to spend a while in the hospital wing but he will be okay,” she said.
James breathed a sigh of relief.
Madam Pomfrey came over to him next. “Let’s see what we can do about you,” she said, examining him. “You have a couple broken bones, a bad gash on your face, and a concussion,” she said. “I’ll give you a couple potions to tend to these but I want you to stay here for the night just to be safe.” James nodded and sat back while she went and got the potions.
She came back a minute later with three different potions. “Purple first for the bones. Then blue for the concussion and the headache that I’m sure you have. Then green for nourishment.” She also rubbed a salve on his rapidly swelling cut.
He nodded and took the potions. She returned a minute later with a clear potion and handed it to him. “To help you sleep. I’m sure you’ll need it tonight,” she said, giving him a sympathetic look. He drank the potion with one swallow and handed the vial back to her.
Almost immediately he started to feel very tired. He felt himself starting to drift off. He tried to fight it, scared to leave Sirius on his own but the sensation was too powerful. He fell into a deep, heavy sleep as he saw Madam Pomfrey go into Sirius’s little room.
---
James woke up early the next morning. He was feeling much better. The swelling on his face was gone and the cut was now a small scratch. His leg and his ribs were a little stiff, but nothing horrible. Madam Pomfrey was sitting next to Sirius, the curtain now partly open just enough for James to see. It looked as though she had fallen asleep next to him. Sirius looked like he had been hit by the knight bus. He was drained of any color and his face was pretty bruised. His lower lip was split and his right eye was swollen shut.
“How is he?” James asked hoarsely, still waking up.
“He’ll be fine. He’s not out of the woods yet, but he should be okay,” Pomfrey said. “More importantly, how are you Mr. Potter?” she asked standing up and walking over to stand next to him.
“I’m alright.” James said. “Pretty sore, but it’s nothing serious,” he said, still looking at Sirius.
Madam Pomfrey left and came back a minute later with a red potion. “Here, this should help with the pain. As long as you’re sure you feel okay, you are free to go,” she told him, handing him the vial.
James took it and drank it all in one swallow. “Yeah I’m fine, just please focus on helping Sirius.”
Madam Pomfrey took back the vial and nodded.
James stood up and looked around. It was then that he noticed another bed with the curtain closed. “Did someone else come in?” James asked, walking over to the bed.
“He came in very early this morning, while you were asleep. We were hoping to be able to tell Mr. Black, but seeing as how he has yet to wake up we couldn’t do that. He’s in rough shape from the previous night,” Madam Pomfrey said dismissively.
James opened the curtain to see Remus lying asleep in the bed. He looked tired. He didn’t look to be injured, but James knew that full moons took everything out of Remus, and it usually took him a couple days to recover.
James grew angry upon seeing Remus. He grabbed him by the shoulders and shook him awake. “How could you do that to Sirius! What were you thinking? You could have killed him you...you psycho!” James yelled into his face.
Remus sat up and tried to back away from James. “I don’t know what you’re talking about! What happened to Sirius?” he asked, raising an arm to distance himself and James.
“Oh don’t pretend, you know full well what you did to him,” James spat lunging at him again.
Madam Pomfrey ran over and grabbed James to stop him. “Mr. Potter, you need to calm down before I kick you out,” she said, pulling him back.
“I swear I don’t know what you’re talking about James,” Remus pleaded. “I don’t remember anything from yesterday. I just remember waking up that morning and then I woke up here and that was it. I don’t know how I got here,” he said.
James calmed down. “Okay, okay. I’m sorry for yelling at you. I'm just confused and frustrated,” he said. Madam Pomfrey backed off to give the boys some time to talk.
“I understand. Now please, tell me what happened to Sirius,” Remus begged.
“It was like you went wild Remus. We got to the shack and you were just zoned out. And then after you transformed you just went after Sirius. I tried to help but there was no stopping you. It was pretty bad,” James told him.
Remus shuddered. “I hurt Sirius? Where is he? I need to see him!” Remus said, frantically getting to his feet.
“Remus you need to rest, you’re in no shape to be out and about right now,” James said putting his hands on Remus’s shoulders and trying to push him back down. Remus was too strong.
“James please. I need to see him,” he said pushing his arms away. James put his hands up as if to back off.
Remus looked around and saw the curtain drawn. He immediately started walking towards the curtain, James followed close behind. Scared of what he would see on the other side, he tentatively pulled the curtain back to reveal Sirius. Remus gasped at the sight of him. He looked awful.
“I did this?” Remus asked.
“I’m sorry Remus. I don’t know what to say. He’ll be fine in time.” James said. “I’ll give you two some time,” James said as he got up and left to wait outside.
Remus pulled over a chair and sat down next to Sirius.
“Oh, Sirius. I’m so sorry. I can’t believe I did this.” Remus held Sirius’s hand.
After a while Remus let go of Sirius’s hand and got up to walk away. He ran into James on his way out. “Will you let me know when you know something?” he asked.
“Of course. You’re not staying?” James asked. “I’m sure he’ll want to see you when he wakes up.”
“I can’t be here. I just need to be away from everyone right now,” Remus said, backing away from James.
“Remus,” James said.
“James, just don’t. I need to figure this all out right now,” Remus said as he left. He walked down the empty hallway and headed for the headmaster’s office.
When he got there he knocked on the door and waited for Dumbledore to answer. It took him a minute but he finally let Remus in.
“Ah Mr. Lupin, just the student I’ve been meaning to talk to,” he said, ushering Remus into the room.
“Professor,” Remus said in greeting.
“I’ve been wanting to talk to you about last night. There’s still some things that we need answered about the events that transpired,” he said looking expectantly at Remus. “Why don’t you walk me through everything you remember from yesterday. Start as early as you can,” he said.
Remus nodded. “Well I remember waking up really early. I wasn’t feeling too hot so I figured I would go and take a shower. And after that everyone was still asleep and I didn’t want to disrupt them so I headed down to the library. It starts to get a bit fuzzy from here. I remember getting to the library and I wasn’t alone. There was somebody else there but I can’t remember who it was. And I remember talking to them, I recognized them, I think. And then I remember waking up here. And that’s it Professor, that’s all I remember I swear!” he told Dumbledore, trying to put all the pieces together.
Dumbledore nodded and thought about this information for a while. “Well it sounds like someone put you under a spell or a potion. I couldn’t say what without knowing more information,” he said.
“Professor Dumbledore, I came here because I’m worried I might hurt someone else. What if this happens again? I can’t bear the thought of hurting another student or worse, turning them. I can’t take that risk Professor.” Remus pleaded with him. “Please, I need help.”
“Mr. Lupin, it is highly unlikely that this would occur again but seeing as how we don’t know who did this to you, or what their motivation was it is better to be cautious,” Dumbledore said. “You will remain with your fellow students for now, and once we start nearing the next full moon, we will isolate you where you cannot hurt another student. Your friends may not join you until we are certain it is safe once again. Until then, I see no reason why you cannot continue classes with your fellow students,” he told Remus.
Remus nodded his head in understanding. If Professor Dumbledore felt it was safe for him to be at the school, he couldn’t argue with that. But he was still going to keep his distance from his friends for the time being.
“Now if that is all Mr. Lupin, I need to clear some things with the ministry board as well as check in with Madam Pomfrey.”
Remus shook his head to say that was all. He stood up and left, heading for the dorms. As soon as he got there he laid down on his bed and quickly fell asleep, he was still recovering after all.
---
James had been sitting with Sirius all day. Peter had checked in a few times but he had lots of school work to catch up on so he couldn’t stay very long. It seemed forever that they were sitting there in that hospital wing.
Sometime that evening, after dinner, Sirius started to stir in the bed. James, who’d been sitting with his fist against his cheek and trying hard to stay awake, felt the movement and quickly sat upright, staring expectantly at Sirius. His head turned over and he let out a small moan, he was still in pain.
After a minute he finally started to open his eyes. He looked around the room trying to figure out where he was. His eyes landed on James. He immediately looked around the room again, this time looking for a particular face. “Moony…?” he asked James once he realized he wasn’t there.
“I’m sorry Padfoot, he’s not here. I don’t think he’s going to be coming,” James said with a sad look on his face.
Sirius looked away. He went to sit up and had a surge of pain course through him. His arm clutched his stomach as he cried out.
“Easy, you’re still in pretty rough shape,” James said, putting his arms on Sirius’s shoulders and gently pushing him back down.
“You’re not kidding,” Sirius replied.
James rested his hand on Sirius’s leg and he let out a sharp hiss. James quickly drew back his hand. “Sorry!” he said quickly.
“How bad is it?” Sirius asked.
James pulled back the bed sheets and lifted Sirius’s pant leg just above his knee. He looked and saw a bite mark on Sirius’s calf. It was bigger than his hand and it was a dark purple and green color with dried blood coating the surface. James didn’t respond, he just stared at it. He didn’t want to tell Sirius that he had been bitten. But James’s lack of words told Sirius everything he needed to know.
“I got bit didn’t I?” he asked flat out.
“I’m sorry Sirius.” James said, not wanting to admit it out loud.
Sirius closed his eyes and put his head down on the pillows.
“It might not be so bad. I’ve read that a bite doesn’t always guarantee that you’ll turn.”
Sirius didn’t respond. He didn’t know how to process this information. “I want to see Remus. I need to see Remus.” he said.
James nodded. “I know, but he isn’t going to come. I think he’s scared that he’s going to hurt you again.”
“That’s ridiculous,” Sirius said.
“I know. Listen, I should probably get going but I’ll tell Moony that you were asking for him okay?” James said, getting up.
Sirius nodded and watched as James left.
Later that night, Madam Pomfrey checked in with him one last time for the evening and then headed to her office and closed the door. Sirius very slowly, and painfully sat up and swung his legs over the bed. He slowly stood up. His leg hurt pretty bad and his chest was killing him. Everything hurt but he kept going. He had to see Remus.
When he was on his feet he had a hard time focusing. Everything was going in and out of fuzziness. He stumbled to the door of the hospital wing and limped his way to Gryffindor tower.
He saw a figure come out of the library as he came closer to it on his way. He was leaning against the wall, depending on it to support him.
“Sirius?” A voice asked, alarmed, rushing towards him. “Sirius! What are you doing out here? You look awful, you should be in bed.” It was Remus.
Sirius looked up and let go of the wall. He stepped forward “Remus!” he said as he collapsed into the boy’s arms. “I was looking for you Remus. I needed to see you.”
Remus gently lowered him to the ground resting him against his chest as he leaned against the wall. “Sirius…” he started but he didn’t know what to say. “You can’t be here, Sirius. You need to stay away from me,” he said.
“No, Remus. I’m not scared of you. I’m not just going to give up on you because something bad happened. We’ll figure it out. Do you even know what happened?” Sirius looked up into hazel eyes.
“I’m getting bits back. I remember waking up and then meeting someone. I think… oh my god...” Remus said after a minute and became very quiet.
“What? Tell me.” Sirius said, taking in a deep, painful breath.
“It...it was your mother I saw. She...she cursed me. And then she told me to betray you, to hurt you. I remember that’s all I could think about. I think she put a memory charm on me because I couldn’t remember anything else. It was like I had no control over it, I just had to do it. I don’t think she knew I’m a werewolf, so she didn’t expect me to try and kill you,” Remus said, his eyes watering. His eyes held a deep sorrow, he was full of pain over what he did.
Sirius wasn’t surprised by this news. “Oh, Remus. That must have been awful, I’m so sorry,” he said. He took in a hitched breath and stifled a small cry of pain.
“Sirius we really need to get you back,” Remus said, looking concerned.
“Remus it’s okay.” Sirius said, ignoring him. “It sounds like she put you under Imperius. You had no choice. You don’t need to be worried about hurting me again Remus. Please don’t stay away,” he begged.
“I’m so sorry Sirius, for everything. The last thing I would ever want is to hurt you,” Remus said, a single tear running down his cheek. He looked away from the injured boy.
“It’s okay Remus. I forgive you.” Sirius said, reaching up with a shaky hand and wiping the tear from the boy’s cheek. He wrapped his arm around Remus’s head and pulled it down to meet his. He looked into his eyes and reached up slightly, planting his lips against Remus’s.
Remus leaned in and kissed him back. They sat like that for a few minutes until they came up for air.
Sirius slowly put his head back down, sucking in a breath at the movement.
“Sirius.” Remus gave him a stern look. “You’re in no condition to be out right now. We need to get you back. I don’t even know how you made it this far. You’re in pain,” Remus said.
“Only a little.” The pained expression on his face told another story.
Remus gave him a look and shifted Sirius so he could stand up.
Sirius tried to follow suit but as soon as he was on his feet he collapsed again. Before he could hit the floor, Remus scooped him up in his arms and started carrying him back to the hospital wing. Sirius leaned his head against Remus’s shoulder and gave in.
When they arrived at the hospital wing, Remus slowly put Sirius onto the bed. He gave the boy a somber look.
“Stay,” Sirius said, patting the bed. “Please.”
Remus smiled and climbed into the bed. He wrapped his arms around Sirius and stroked his hair. Eventually they fell asleep entwined in each other’s arms.
---
The next morning Remus got up early. He got up from the bed and Sirius winced at the movement.
“Sorry babe,” Remus smiled.
“Leaving so soon?” Sirius asked looking up at the boy.
“I have to go eat breakfast and I can’t miss class but you know I’ll be back,” Remus said, leaning down and planting a kiss on Sirius’s forehead.
“Alright fine. Have a good day.” Sirius smiled and leaned back down.
Remus smiled back and looked at Sirius for a minute. He finally turned around and headed out.
At breakfast, Remus found James and Peter and went to join them.
“I talked with Sirius last night,” he casually dropped as he helped himself to some eggs and bacon.
James put down his fork. “You did? How was it? I thought you were staying away.”
“I was,” Remus replied. “The idiot came to find me last night and almost killed himself in the process. I had to carry him back to the hospital wing and we started talking. I think we finally figured out what happened that day,” Remus said.
Peter turned his full attention to the conversation. “Oh yeah? Well what happened?” he said impatiently.
“It was Sirius’s parents. I guess they found out about us and they didn’t approve. They paid me a visit and put me under Imperius as well as a memory charm so I didn’t remember. They told me to betray Sirius, to hurt him. I guess they thought that would push him away from me. And I’m guessing they don’t know what I am so they didn’t know that doing this on a full moon was asking for disaster. That’s why I went after Sirius that night, I didn’t know what I was doing,” he explained. “Although I still don’t know how I got to be in the hospital wing the next morning,” he said.
Peter looked at Remus. “Oh that was me,” he said. “You didn’t know I was there when everything was going down. I stayed hidden in the bushes because there was nothing I could do without getting myself killed. After Prongs took off with Padfoot, I followed you to make sure you were okay. You didn’t know what was going on. You spent most of the night tearing up the woods and then once the sun started to come out you transformed back. You kind of stood there in a daze before you finally passed out. That’s when I changed and grabbed Mcgonagall to help me bring you back,” he explained. “That’s when she told me about Sirius.”
Remus thought this over. “Wow, I don’t remember any of that,” he said.
“Of course not, if you were under a memory charm you wouldn’t. In fact, how do you remember all this now?” James asked.
“I’m not sure,” Remus responded. “If I had to guess I’d say that maybe it was because it was on the full moon when my magical signature was different to reflect my lycanthropy. And once I transformed back it wasn’t effective anymore?” he offered.
“I guess that’d make sense,” Peter said.
“That’s insane. I can’t believe they would do that!” James finally responded. “We need to make a plan or something,” James said under his breath.
“What do you mean?” Remus said as he and Peter looked at James.
“Well Snivelly can’t just get away with this. Not after everything that happened to Sirius. He can’t just get away with it,” James said angrily.
“But how can we be sure that it was Severus? That’s a serious accusation to make James,” Remus said, raising his eyebrows.
“Who else could it be Moony? You said it yourself. He was there in the astronomy tower that night. How else can you explain that everything happened right after that. Nobody else knew about you two. Nobody else knew.” James was pleading at this point. He could see Severus sitting at the Slytherin table, talking with his fellow classmates. It made him even more mad to see him sitting there. He wasn't listening when Remus responded.
“I guess that makes sense but we still can’t be sure James,” he said.
By then James had stood up.
“Where are you going?” Peter asked, looking up at him.
James didn’t respond. He started walking towards the Slytherin table, his eyes still locked on Severus.
“James.” He could hear Remus say, but he ignored it.
When he got close to the Slytherin table, Severus looked up at him.
“What do you think you’re doing over here?” he snarled at James.
“Oh, shut up, Snivelly! Do you even know what you did to him?” he yelled angrily. “He could’ve been killed because of your selfish arse!” he yelled. By now the whole Slytherin table was watching them. And the rest of the Great Hall seemed to quiet down as everyone turned their attention towards the two.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Severus said, trying to diffuse the situation.
“Oh, don’t play that game with me. You know exactly what you did!” he yelled, grabbing Severus by the collar.
Lily Evans ran over and stood behind Severus. “What are you doing, Potter?” she said angrily.
“Your friend over here ran his little mouth off about Sirius and almost got him killed!” James yelled raising his fist, ready to punch him.
“What are you talking about?” she yelled.
“I’ll tell you what! Snivelly over here went and told about Sirius and R-”
“James!” Remus yelled as he ran over to him. “You better shut your mouth before you spill something you shouldn’t,” he said quietly into James’ ear.
James realized what he was about to say and he immediately dropped his hand and let go of Severus. “You’re lucky Remus is here,” he said as he turned to Remus to walk away. The two boys left the Great Hall together and headed for their first class.
As he was leaving, James heard Lily say to Severus; “That James Potter is insane. His day will come.”
---
Later that day Sirius was sitting in the hospital wing, bored out of his mind. He was still extremely sore but he was ready to leave the wing and get back to his regular life. He didn’t know how he was going to face his parents or what to do.
He was taken aback when he saw his little brother Regulus come to visit him. He looked upset about something. They hadn’t seen each other much since their fight. Regulus had been unhappy ever since Sirius was sorted into Gryffindor. And when he learned who Sirius was surrounding himself with, Regulus became very angry. They had a big fight about it. Reg accused Sirius of betraying the Black family and Sirius had called him a heartless arse. They hadn’t talked since.
“Reg. I didn’t expect to see you here,” Sirius said, looking away from his brother.
“Me neither,” Regulus admitted softly.
“So why are you here?” Sirius asked nonchalantly.
“I wanted to make sure you were okay. I’m still your brother you know,” Reg said. “How did this even happen? I don’t understand.”
Sirius thought about telling him the truth. He didn’t know if he could trust Regulus. But if his parents already knew, what harm is there in telling Reg. As he said, he is still his brother.
Sirius explained the situation to Regulus as he sat quietly and listened.
“It was our parents Reg. They put him under the Imperius and told him to hurt me. They didn’t mean for it to go this far but they did it nonetheless,” Sirius explained, careful not to spill Remus’s secret.
Regulus looked up at him. “Oh, Sirius. I’m so sorry. I feel awful,” He said, looking remorseful.
“Why are you apologising Reg? You had nothing to do with it,” Sirius asked confused.
“But I did. I was so mad at you for the things you said to me. I wanted to get back at you. I heard Severus telling Lily about how he saw you two in the astronomy tower. I shut him up but then I told our parents. I never thought they’d go this far Sirius, I swear. I never wanted you to get hurt. I’m so sorry,” he said, not looking at Sirius but at the floor.
“Reg. I understand. You were mad. I probably would have done the same thing if I were you. And I’m sorry about what I said to you,” Sirius looked at his brother, not wanting to prolong their fight.
“I can see now that you really care for Remus. And he really cares for you. As do the rest of your friends, judging by that display at breakfast,” Regulus casually dropped.
“What? What happened at breakfast?” Sirius asked.
“Oh, well, your friend James looked like he was going to kill Severus. He went after him in the Great Hall and I’m sure he would have done something had it not been for Remus. He talked him down before he could say anything he regretted,” Regulus explained.
Sirius sighed and put his head in his hand. “Oh James. He never really thinks before he does something.” Sirius laughed.
“Well neither do you a lot of the time,” Regulus countered. They both laughed at that. “Well I better be heading back to my classes. I hope you feel better soon Sirius,” Regulus said as he left.
Sirius nodded and smiled at him.
---
The next morning Madam Pomfrey finally let Sirius leave the hospital wing so long as he took it easy for the next couple days. Sirius was still a bit sore. Every movement he made sent pain through his body, but it was getting better every day. He needed to be with his friends.
He joined them for breakfast that morning. They looked at him in surprise when he came in.
“Padfoot!” James called excitedly when he saw him. “You’re here! I thought you’d be out much longer!”
“Me too.” Sirius responded. “But I’m glad to be back.” His three friends nodded as they helped themselves to breakfast.
Sirius looked around the Great Hall and his gaze landed on the Slytherin table. Severus was eyeing him, looking as though he was trying to figure out what happened to Sirius. He stared back at the Slytherin. His gaze then fell on Regulus who was smiling slightly at him. He returned the smile and went back to his food.
“So Moony, I was hoping we could talk later?” Sirius offered hopefully.
“Of course we can.” Remus smiled at him.
Sirius nodded. They sat quietly as they finished their breakfast then headed off to class. Sirius pulled Remus aside to talk with him. “We’ll catch up with you,” he said to James and Peter as they went ahead.
“What’s up, Sirius?” Remus asked.
“I just wanted to make sure that we were all good. I know you feel guilty about what happened but it wasn’t your fault. I don’t know what we are going to do about my parents,” Sirius said getting lost in his ramblings.
“I know Sirius. It doesn’t make it any easier though, knowing that I did that to you. But I understand that I wasn’t in control. And I’m not sure what to do about your parents. What would you typically do when they do something invasive like this?” he asked.
“I don’t really think I’d do anything. I wouldn’t confront them.”
“Okay so then maybe wait and see if they come to you. I don’t want to make the situation any worse for you,” Remus offered.
“Yeah okay,” Sirius responded.
The two boys nodded and headed to class.
That night after class, the four boys were in the dorm. It was late and James and Peter had just gone to bed. Sirius stalked over to Remus’s bed and tapped lightly on the bed post.
“Yeah?” He heard a whispered response.
Sirius drew open the bed curtains and moved to sit down on the edge of the bed. “I can’t sleep Re. I’m still so sore and I’ve had some nightmares,” he said, looking up at the werewolf.
“You’re always welcome to come sleep with me,” Remus responded with a smile.
Sirius smiled back at him and layed down. Remus layed pressed against his back and wrapped his arms around Sirius's torso. Sirius grabbed his upper arm and entwined their fingers together. Remus rested his head on the other boy’s shoulder, breathing in his scent.
“I’ve missed you,” Remus whispered.
“Mmmm.” Sirius moaned in response. “Remus?” he asked after a minute.
“Yes?” he responded.
“Does it hurt? When you transform?” Sirius asked, looking straight ahead at the bed curtains.
“Why do you ask that?” Remus responded, turning his face into Sirius’s neck.
“I just want to be prepared,” Sirius responded nonchalantly.
Remus lifted his head at this. “What do you mean Sirius?” And when he got no response he sat up. “Sirius. What’s going on?” he asked.
Again, Sirius didn’t respond.
Remus got off the bed and walked around it so he was in front of the other boy.
Sirius took a deep breath and sat up. He reached down and began to lift his pant leg, sucking in a deep breath as it passed over the bite. Remus gasped when he saw the mark and kneeled to take a closer look.
“No,” he said quietly. “I..I bit you?” he asked unnecessarily.
Sirius looked away and laid back down.
Remus sat there for a minute before getting back into bed. He wrapped his arm around Sirius and lay quietly for a few minutes. “It hurts at first.” He finally spoke up. “But the longer you do it, the more numb you become to it.”
Sirius nodded slowly. A single tear fell down his cheek as he pressed himself into Remus and closed his eyes. They lay there entwined in each other in silence for a while before they finally fell asleep.