Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

Ask any student at Yorkshin High about Mr. Kurta and Mr. Paladiknight, and they’d tell you the same thing; they were in love with each other. Though, at outside glance, the two teachers seemed indifferent, hostile even, their students knew better, and thus it became the goal of the 287th graduating class to get the two of them together. 

Mr. Kurta was one of the students’ favorite teachers. Articulate and with a perspicacious intellect, he was the gem of the history department, and the main reason so many students signed up for world history. Additionally, if asked, none of his students would be ashamed to admit that he was very good looking. With his soft, tousled blonde hair and affinity for turtlenecks and plaid pants, he was the very embodiment of the ‘dark academia history teacher’, even being seen frequenting used book stores and scribbling into a worn leather bound notebook. He was smart, he was educated, and he was on the receiving end of half of the school’s affections.

The other half, however, went to his polar opposite, Mr. Paladiknight. A former CEO of a medical supply company, Dr. Paladiknight now taught biology at Yorkshin High. When asked about his reason for leaving a decently sized six figure salary job, Mr. Paladiknight would grumble under his breath, something sounding like “hated those damn capitalist pigs”, and refuse to answer any more questions. Though he did have a drastic shift in careers, his corporate professionalism stayed the same, much to his students’ and fellow teachers’ delight, leaving the biology teacher wearing ridiculously expensive, custom tailored suits every day. Added to his staggering height of almost six and a half feet, not to mention his sharp jawline and frequently exhibited playful smirk, it was no wonder that the students who weren’t already fawning over Mr. Kurta flocked to Mr. Paladiknight. 

The two teachers were often discussed both inside the school and out in the community, either for their good looks, their distinct (yet completely opposite) teaching methods, or most commonly, for their infamous feud. It had started as a little spat between the two men three years ago, and was frequently referred to by students as the “take that back” incident. Initially, it should have ended up being just a small misunderstanding, but both men were stubborn to a fault, and it ended up spiraling into the well known Paladiknight/Kurta feud. Though it was referred to as a feud, both students and teachers alike would snicker behind their hands, swearing up and down that it was actually just that the two men were attracted to each other, and had no idea how to flirt. Eventually, a few students began to get tired of the relationship hitting its seemingly unbreakable barrier, and decided to take action, forming a club dedicated to pushing the two teachers together. 

“Are you an idiot?” Killua asked the shorter boy next to him. “You’re gonna ask them if they like each other? They aren’t gonna tell you!”

“Yeah, I’m an idiot! I’m an idiot so I want to ask!” The shorter boy, Gon, yelled back at him.

Killua’s frown deepened, and all of the other students in the classroom swore they could see flames behind him. “Then go right ahead!”

“I sure will!” 

One of the other students sitting in the classroom, a boy named Goreinu, turned to the front of the classroom and addressed the teacher. “Mrs. Krueger?” She fixed him with a glare. “Ah, sorry, uhh, Bisky. Will they be okay?” He asked, gesturing to the two fuming boys sitting in front of him, Gon sitting at a desk and Killua sitting on top of it, swinging his legs dangerously close to hitting Gon in the face. 

Bisky beamed. “This is perfectly normal for them,” she said, an innocent grin pulling at her lips. Sure enough, a few moments later, the boys had resolved their little argument.

“You really are an idiot, you know.” Killua said, lightly ruffling Gon’s hair and blushing slightly.

Gon beamed. “Yeah, but I’m your idiot.”

“Stupid! Don’t just say things like that so casually!” Killua blushed bright red, turning away at Gon’s teasing chuckles. Bisky let out a small giggle behind her palm and stood up, clearing her throat to get the attention of the students in the classroom.

“Hello everyone! Welcome! Today is the first meeting of Operation Hunter, and I’m glad to see so many of you here."

A small chorus of voices filled the room.

“Why’s it called Operation Hunter? ”

“That’s a dumb name.”

“Can we change it?”

“Let’s make it something funny.”

“Yeah, like Operation 69 or something, haha.”

“Nice.”

“Nice.”

“Nice.”

They were all silenced by the subtle twitch in Bisky’s brow and the angry glare in her eyes, her face maintaining a pleasant smile. A few students audibly gulped. “Anyways,” she started sweetly, “we’re here because we want to get Mr. Kurta and Mr. Paladiknight together, am I correct?” The students nodded their head, a few giving their verbal confirmation. “Good. Now, since this is technically a club, we have to pretend to have a real activity outside of investing in teachers’ personal lives, so I’ve decided we’re going to be a gemstone club! Any comments?” She shot a death glare around the room, daring any of the students to voice their objections. Thankfully, none did.

“Perfect! As your club advisor, as well as teacher supervisor, I’ll be here if you need me, but other than that, feel free to plan your scheming as you’d like.”

A timid student in the back, soft hair pulled into two pigtails, raised her hand. Bisky nodded, letting the student know that they were free to ask their question, then looked back at the student and realized who it was. “Ah, sorry Komugi, please ask your question.” She told the girl.

“Yes! Um, Mrs. Krueger—ah! Bisky! If you don’t mind me asking, why did you volunteer to be the faculty advisor to our club?”

Bisky smiled. “Hmm, why indeed? I suppose I figured it was about time those two kids got together.”

The boy next to Komugi, a tall boy with green hair, snickered. “Kids? How old are you really?”

Komugi gasped, elbowing her laughing boyfriend in the ribs. “Meruem!” She whisper-yelled.

He chuckled and slung his arm around her shoulder. “Sorry, Gigi.” He smirked, leaning down to give her a kiss on the cheek.

Komugi gave a startled eep! and turned to face Meruem, her expression scolding but tone of voice light and playful. “You startled me,” she said, fake pouting.

“I did? I thought you could sense me.”

Komugi opened her eyes just to roll them at him. “You know that’s not how it works,” she admonished playfully, reaching a hand up to cup his face, then pointedly jabbing her finger into his cheek.

“Yeah, yeah,” Meruem said, wrapping his other arm around her and pulling her in closer to his chest, his best friend Shiapouf watching on despondently. His other two friends, Neferpitou and Menthuthuyoupi smiled, watching the couple with a soft fondness in their eyes.

Bisky cleared her throat. “Moving on,” she gave a glare to Meruem, who smirked and raised his eyebrows in a ‘who, me?’ gesture. “Let’s take attendance. Say ‘here’ when I call your name.”

“Gon.”

“Here!”

“Killua.”

“You already talked about us, why do you have to—wha—ow! Gon! Why—fine. Here.”

“Ahem. Goreinu.”

“Here.”

“Shiapouf.”

“Present!”

“Menthuthuyoupi.”

“Mhm.”

“Neferpitou.”

“Here.”

“Komugi.”

“Yes! Here!”

“Meruem.”

The classroom was silent.

“Meruem?”

Bisky was about to lose it. Finally looking up from her list, she saw the grinning boy. “Okay, Meruem is here. Meruem will also be in after school detention today.”

The boy opened his mouth to protest, but was swiftly cut off. “You plan to send him to detention? I cannot have that! Oh, send me with him if you must! I will not abandon him!”

Bisky didn’t even need to look up to know who was talking. “Okay, Shiapouf, if you must. Neferpitou, Menthuthuyoupi, I assume you want to go as well?”

The two shared a tired look, then agreed. Bisky knew it wasn’t worth it to ask Komugi. As much as she might want to go support her boyfriend, she had to practice for the upcoming Gungi national matches. Bisky sighed. “I don’t care who else ends up going. I just want to get through this list. No more interruptions. I mean it .” The class shared a collective shiver, then fell quiet. Good, Bisky thought, I’ve still got it.

“Zushi.”

“Here!”

“Alluka.” Bisky paused, looking at Killua. He looked briefly at his sister, turned back to Bisky, and shook his head. She nodded. “Nanika.”

“Aye.”

“Kalluto.”

“Here.”

“Meleoron.”

“Yup.”

“Ikalgo.”

“Here.”

“Menchi.”

“Here!”

“Hanzo.”

“Present.”

“Amane.”

“Here.”

“Canary.”

“Here.”

“And finally, Buhara.”

“Here.”

Bisky clapped her hands. “Okay! Now that everyone’s here, let’s—”

In a flash, she hopped out of her seat, faster than anyone should have been able to move, and yanked the door open. In the doorway stood an amused looking Principal Netero. “Impressive as ever, Biscuit.” He smiled.

Bisky playfully rolled her eyes. “Can I ask what you’re doing in front of my classroom, Isaac?”

He laughed. “Can’t an old principal come around and check on his students and their clubs every once in a while?”

“Sure they can. However, you’re here for something different.”

Principal Netero grinned. “Perceptive. Actually, yes.” He straightened his shoulders, one hand coming up to stroke his beard. “I overheard your club’s main goal.” A devilish look flashed in his eyes, one mixed with humor. “I want to help.”

Chapter Text

After finishing their meeting, with Principal Netero now an active participant, the group had figured out their first plan. However, they were wary of just one key aspect: Gon’s acting. Though everyone in the group would be quick to jump in to speak to Gon’s kindness, willingness to help, and overall personality, the boy’s ability to act left much to be desired. 

“Okay, Gon, you remember the plan?” Killua asked him.

Gon nodded enthusiastically. “Yep! Tell Leorio I’m gay!”

Killua flicked him in the forehead, looking down at his boyfriend. “Gon, tell me you remember what we just talked about.”

Gon started thinking, so hard that all the members of the group (of whom Bisky had affectionately dubbed “Hunters”, for some unknown reason) could’ve sworn steam was funneling out of his ears. Killua sighed. “Hey, old lady,” he called out to Bisky, “tell him the plan again.”

Bisky’s eyes narrowed at the jab, and she had to fight back the urge to smack Killua upside the head. “Damned brat,” she muttered under her breath. “I mean!” She switched back quickly to her happy and bubbly demeanor. “Of course I can. Gon, listen closely, okay?”

Gon nodded, so hard that Killua was worried he’d knock himself out. Bisky continued. “You’re going to go to Mr. Paladiknight’s classroom during lunch and ask to talk to him. You two have a close relationship, so this shouldn’t be too out of the ordinary or out of your comfort zone. Right?”

“Right!” Gon supplied helpfully.

“Okay.” Bisky nodded. “When you guys start talking, you’re going to talk to him about your feelings, more specifically your feelings,” Bisky shot a quick glare at Killua, who had a smug smirk sitting on his face, “for a certain individual. Then, ask him for his advice on what to do about it. Really try and encourage him to talk about his own experiences, okay?”

“Got it!” Gon smiled. 

“Hey, Gon?” Killua asked, slowly walking over towards him. Gon looked at him, tilting his head slightly to the side, as if to ask what he wanted. Killua’s smile morphed into a shit eating grin. “Do you maybe want something to reference when you go to talk with Leorio?”

At this, Alluka turned in her chair to look between the two boys, rolling her eyes. “Oh, god.” She muttered under her breath. “Gross, Lu.”

Total and utter confusion crossed Gon’s face. “Huh?”

“You know,” Killua continued, eyes full of mischief, “something like—ow!”

He was cut off by the sound of a notebook hitting a head. More specifically, Alluka’s notebook hitting his head. “Don’t be gross.” Alluka said, crossing her arms and leveling her eyes with Killua’s. “There are children here. And by children I mean me. No one wants to see that.”

A soft snicker from behind Alluka let Gon and Killua know that Kalluto was standing behind her. “Come on,” Killua groaned. “It’s not that bad.”

From the front of the classroom, Bisky joined in. “I’m an adult and I don’t want to see it either!”

Killua glared at her. “I think you’re far past ‘adult’ at this point, grandma.” Behind him, Menthuthuyoupi and Meruem poorly disguise their laughter, coughing overly dramatically. Killua joins in, ducking to miss the expertly thrown eraser from the front of the classroom. 

Principal Netero, who was watching the goings-on of the classroom in lazy amusement, opened his mouth to speak. “Gon,” he said, “it’s time. Better get going.”

Gon nodded, hopping out of his chair and turning to salute Principal Netero, who good-naturedly saluted back. “Wish me luck!” He yelled, and turned to break out in a mad dash down the hallway. 

“Should we have maybe—” Menchi started, unsure of what to say next. The group nodded in silent understanding of the question. Ikalgo simply sighed.

“Yeah, this probably won’t go well.” Zushi looks down.

“I love Gon, but….” Alluka trails off.

“Somehow,” Canary adds in, “I feel like this plan has a fifty percent chance of the school somehow burning down.”

The members of the group all eye each other warily. All except Killua, who watches Gon’s rapidly moving form disappear down the hallway with a fond look in his eye. “God,” he says to himself, absolute infatuation present on his face, “I love him so much.”

Gon knocks on the door, a gesture simply out of habit, as he’s been to Mr. Paladiknight’s classroom more than enough times to just walk in. 

“Eh? What the hell do you want?” The gruff voice from inside the class answered.

“Mr. Paladiknight? It’s me, Gon!” The boy called back.

“Oh? Gon? Come in! Sorry.”

Gon opened the door and walked in, looking fondly around the immaculate classroom. Mr. Paladiknight and Mr. Kurta really were polar opposites. Where Mr. Kurta’s classroom was filled with well-loved novels, vintage french posters, and rugs in soft neutrals that he had convinced (threatened) the school to let him keep, Mr. Paladiknight’s was completely different. Every lab table was thoroughly cleaned, not a book nor a rogue pencil sitting on top of them. On his desk sat three items: his reading glasses case, his Macbook, and a block of glass, inside of which was etched with a double helix. Quite frankly, it made Gon nervous. Although, he thought, if any teacher were to forgive him for making a mess, it would be Mr. Paladiknight.

Awkwardly, the man in front of him cleared his throat, reminding Gon why he was there in the first place. “Oh, right!” He said. “Mr. Paladiknight, I was wondering if I could talk to you about  a personal thing?”

Leorio flushed bright red. “Gon, you’re a good kid, but uh, I think it’s probably best if you have uh, the talk, with one of the school nurses, not me.”

Gon looks at him, completely confused, and Leorio remembers exactly who he’s talking to. Gon Freecss, one of his favorite students, has absolutely no shame. If he wanted to have the sex talk, he would come right out and say it.

Leorio runs his hand through his hair, shaking his head slightly. “Never mind. What do you want to talk about, Gon?”

Gon smiled. “Mr. Paladiknight, can I talk to you about a boy I like?”

Leorio’s eyes widened. So this is what Gon wanted to talk to him about! He takes on a fond, almost paternal look in his eyes, and smiles at him. “Gon, I am so proud of you for deciding to come out to me.”

“Wait no, I—”

“Being gay isn’t just a phase, it’s a part of who you are. Your identity. I want you to know that this doesn’t change anything about you, that it’s just who you like.”

“Mr. Paladiknight, I appreciate it, but—”

“You know, I believe it was Karl Heinrich Ulrichs who first publicly spoke out about gay rights.”

“I—”

“The year was 1867….”

Gon trudged back to the classroom an hour and a half later. Right upon opening the door, he was surprised by a big group of hopeful faces. “How did it go?” Killua asked him excitedly. 

Gon threw his head in his hands and whined. “Nothing. All I got was an hour long ‘it’s okay to be gay’ talk!”

Chapter Text

As was expected, Plan A, or the ‘have Gon get Leorio to open up to him’ plan was a total bust. Although, if you asked Gon, it wasn’t all for naught, as he got a relatively interesting lesson on queer history. 

“Killua!” Gon called out. “Let me tell you about Karl Heinrich Ulrichs!”

Killua groaned. “No way! You’ve been telling me about that old dude for a week straight!”

“But he’s so cool! ” Gon whined.

“Gon, Killua, settle down.” Bisky instructed. “So, as you all know by now, our initial plan of having Gon talk to Leorio has failed.” She turned to the blackboard, picking up a piece of chalk and drawing a cartoonish looking sketch of Gon’s face.

Gon tugged on Killua’s sleeve. “Look, it’s me!” Bisky turned around from her spot at the blackboard, made eye contact with Gon, and turned back to the board, using the same piece of chalk to draw a big X right through the drawing. Killua turned to hide a smirk, and from the back of the classroom, audible laughter could be heard from Meruem and Neferpitou.

“Aw, man.” Gon pouted.

“So,” Bisky said, dusting the chalk off of her hands. “This leads us to Plan B, and with a potentially bigger idiot than last time.” Killua frowned, Gon pausing for a second to determine whether or not he should be insulted, then swiftly joined his boyfriend with a frown of his own.

“Killua,” Bisky looked at him, “you’ll be going this time, to try and get information out of Mr. Kurta. I’m told you and he have a similar relationship to Mr. Paladiknight and Gon’s?”

Killua shrugged. “Dunno. Guess we’ll see.”

Bisky’s brow twitched in anger. “Insufferable brat.” Taking a deep breath, she once again plastered on her too-bright smile. “Okay! Any questions?”

Meruem smirked and raised his hand. Bisky looked around the room, purposely avoiding the green haired boy’s gaze. “No? Great! Killua, are you ready?”

Killua nodded. “Alright, I’m off.” He stood, getting up on top of his chair, moving to stand on the top of the desk, then did a backflip off.

Bisky sighed. Gon clapped his hands and laughed. Alluka rolled her eyes. And far back on the left side of the classroom, Zushi held his head in his hands. “Why are all my friends so weird?” He muttered to himself.

“Yo,” Killua called out, walking into the classroom. Turning his body quickly to avoid hitting a stack of Mr. Kurta’s favorite books, his eye catching on The Timetables of History, he scanned the room for his blond history teacher, finally spotting the man at his desk. Brown leather chelsea boots were propped up on the desk, their wearer lounging casually in his desk chair, reading a well-loved copy of Beloved. Killua smirked. “You’re a history teacher. Shouldn’t you be like, reading old maps or something?”

Kurapika placed the open book on his desk, flipping it so he wouldn’t lose his place. “Mr. Zoldyck,” he said pointedly, “one must apply themselves in all areas of academia to procure a well rounded education.”

Killua and Kurapika held eye contact for a few seconds, neither man backing down, until they both burst into laughter. “You sound like my grandpa when you talk like that,” Killua complained, “old man.”

Kurapika snorted. “Gross. Anyways, did you need something, Killua?”

Killua feigned disinterest, pretending to pick at his nails. “Dunno,” he said, shrugging his shoulders. “Just came to talk, I guess.”

Kurapika raised an eyebrow at the student in front of him. “Anything I can help with? You know both my classroom and my office are a safe space,” he said, gesturing to the posters on the wall proclaiming the same. “However,” he paused, “I am obligated to tell you that I am a mandated reporter, so please keep that in mind.”

Killua nodded. “Got it. I’m actually here to talk about Mr. Paladiknight.”

Kurapika cocked his head slightly. “Mr. Paladiknight?” His face contorted into a slight grimace.

“Yeah.”

“Well, what about Mr. Pala—uh, him?”

Killua paused for a second, wondering how best to respond to Mr. Kurta’s question. If he was too obvious, the man might get defensive, but if he was too vague, he might not get the answers he wanted. Plus, since Gon had already failed with Leorio, Killua wanted to get this done as soon as possible, before either teacher started to suspect anything.

Finally deciding to keep everything relatively casual, Killua shrugged. “He’s a cool teacher, isn’t he?” Though Mr. Kurta kept his carefully crafted neutral expression, Killua could have sworn he saw his eyebrow twitch. He continued. “And, you know, he dresses really cool. In his fancy suits and everything.”

Kurapika cleared his throat. “Okay?”

One more push, Killua thought, one more push and I bet I can shake him up a little bit. “Plus,” Killua spoke, trying desperately to keep the impish smirk off his face, “he’s kind of handsome, don’t you think? I hear some kids talking about it sometimes.”

Kurapika blanched. Jackpot! Killua thought sneakily.

“Killua,” his teacher began, “I think we need to have a talk.”

Wait, Killua thought, this doesn’t seem right.

Kurapika looked at him. “I need you to understand that, while I’m not mad at you, and you’re not in trouble or anything, it’s not okay for you to be romantically interested in a teacher.”

“Oh my god,” Killua started, “that’s not what I—”

“I understand that a teacher being in a position of power over you can feel fun, exciting even.”

“Gross! Jesus! Mr. Kurta, that’s not it!”

Running his hands through his hair, Kurapika sighed. “There’s no need to be embarrassed, Killua. I understand that adolescence is a confusing time for a lot of teenagers.”

Killua looked at him, horrified.

“Why don’t we take the time to discuss some alternative actions you can do instead of thinking about Mr. Paladiknight? I’m also going to suggest having a meeting with the school counselor, okay?”

Killua could have screamed.

Cringing at the memories of the conversation he just had, Killua walked back to the classroom where the members of Operation Hunter were waiting, wondering just how hard he’d have to hit his head to forget that that conversation had ever happened. Groaning, he opened the door, walking in dejectedly.

“Listen, okay? All I’m saying is that Sam definitely had feelings for Frodo! Did you see—oh! Hey, Killua! You’re back!” Hanzo grinned at him. 

“Killua!” Gon shouted, rushing over to him.

 Killua looked at his overly enthusiastic boyfriend, and then down at his hand. “Oh my god, Gon. What happened?” His left hand was swollen, black and blue all over, with skin split at the knuckles. The classroom let out a collective sigh.

“Zushi bet Gon five dollars that Gon couldn’t punch through a brick,” a tired Bisky called from her desk.

Alluka, knowing the protective tendencies of her older brother, rushed over and picked him up under the arms, bending her back to make his feet lift off the floor. “Zushi!” He bellowed, attempting to charge the now-frightened boy, realizing a few seconds later that he was no longer on solid ground.

“What the,” he started, “Alluka! Put me down! How are you even this strong?” 

Alluka smirked. “Sorry, Lu. No assault today.” Killua sighed, reluctantly agreeing, and Alluka gently placed him back on the ground. “So,” she asked, “how did it go?”

The students moved the desks into a circle, taking their seats and listening to Killua recount the horrifying tale of what had happened when he went to talk to Mr. Kurta. As far as reactions went, the class was split pretty evenly, with half snickering into their palms, and the other half looking justifiably appalled. The only one not reacting at all was strangely Meruem, who sat with an uncharacteristically blank face, not even laughing when the rest of his friends started. Killua thought it was completely strange.

It made sense the next day though, when Killua opened his locker to find dozens of pictures of Mr. Paladiknight cut out into heart shapes. He sighed, closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and finally, at the top of his lungs, screamed out “MERUEM!”