Chapter Text
I leaned forward on my chair, placed my elbows on the desk, covered my head with my hands, breathed slowly, and tried to think.
It was twelve o’clock. I had already called Gatsby’s house five times, but not a single one of my attempts was answered. As typical of me, I started worrying and overthinking immediately. Gatsby’s wonderful smile from this morning was what could help me get through the day, but it felt as if my mind still refused to process the truth, everything that had happened the night before. For some reason, I felt lost and didn‘t know what to do or expect. What about Daisy and Tom? Where could Wilson be right now? What was he planning to do? I was almost sure, in some strange and unexplainable way, that he must have already known Gatsby’s name...
My head felt like complete mess.
Suddenly, the worst possible thought hit my mind. My intuition was telling me that Jay may not be safe from now on and despite having known he was going to take the blame for Myrtle’s death in order to keep Daisy safe, I was incredibly mad at myself for not realizing it sooner.
Inside me started growing fear of what might happen, even though I could never know for sure, but my worrisome thoughts were growing bigger with each minute passing.
Finally, I made my decision and left work early without giving any sort of explanation to anyone. I hoped I would catch a train before one o‘clock, and it felt like a miracle when I did at last minute.
I arrived in West Egg before two o’clock and briefly returned to my house, only to throw my briefcase on the floor and to take off my jacket. After that, I hurried to Gatsby’s mansion to check on him: to make sure he was alright as well as to reassure my anxious self.
Faint splashes of water could be heard as I was getting nearer. That made me a little calmer because I believed it was Jay swimming in the pool. Soon I was standing near the bushes and under the white marble stairs I had known well already, but stayed there for a while, not sure whether to come to him and greet him or to simply take a look and go back.
Without making a sound, I eventually took a few steps and gazed toward the pool on the left. As I expected, there was Jay in his bathing suit. I couldn‘t see his face as he was standing in the water with his back turned to me and held onto the edge of the pool, but he still seemed rather relaxed and cool.
Calmer at last, though still careful not to make noise, I intended to start walking back home, but somewhat unknowingly, I turned my head a little to the right.
And it was one huge piece of luck that I did.
There was a figure of a man, who was quietly approaching the pool across the white tiles. I quickly slouched down on the stairs so that he wouldn’t notice me, but in a way that it was still possible for me to watch.
The man I had known looked broken, wore dirty clothes and had not taken care of himself at all. The way he walked suggested he may have been a little drunk.
It was Wilson. I believed he was sure nobody would see him while he was getting closer and closer, and in a few moments he was already standing closer to the pool than my hiding place was.
And that was when I, in terror, finally acknowledged the shotgun he had been carrying the whole time.
„This can‘t be happening...“ my mind started repeating desperately.
Slowly and silently, Wilson raised his hand with the gun, but hesitated for a while, staying in the same position for a couple of seconds.
There was determination in what he was about to commit, though I could see his body was trembling. It was a matter of bare moments at which point he would aim... at Jay... and pull the trigger.
My heart was racing like never before, my soul was screaming horrendously, but my body was like paralyzed. It was terrible, feeling as though my legs had frozen to the steps, and at the same time knowing I couldn‘t wait any longer.
The time was running out and I simply had to do something, anything - at least try, or else...
I didn‘t know how, but the despair my soul was battling with in that critical situation made me run out in an instant, without thinking anymore.
I ran straight towards Wilson as if my feet were on fire, but that would be nothing compared to how I was burning on the inside.
With all my might, I threw myself against the other man in order to push him out of the way. I knocked him down, but before he fell on the ground and hit his head, he had pointed the gun in my direction and pulled the trigger due to shock.
That shot was the most deafening thing I had ever heard.
There was no doubt about where the bullet would end.
In that exact moment, sharp and excruciating pain overflowed my stomach.
I fell on the ground.
It was impossible for me to catch breath, I only panted and groaned heavily, and felt the warm, red sticky liquid soaking through my white shirt and covering my fingers, with which I held onto my wound.
It all happened so quickly...
My life was fading away and there was nothing I could do about it.
My vision became completely blurry.
I couldn‘t see practically anything anymore, I only heard Jay calling out my name repeatedly with undeniable panic in his voice, coming from somewhere near where I was lying.
He must have started running towards us as soon as he heard the shooting and learned where it came from...
Suddenly, I realized something that made me try to smile despite the incredible pain and my inevitable fate.
I was glad that he was safe.
A few seconds before everything went black, I felt his warm, gentle, wet hands touching my face and heard his terrified calls for my name for the last time.