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You should have really known better when you saw Lu-ten through the keyhole, grinning like an idiot. The guy rarely took a hint and his obvious obliviousness to your anger was something you found even more annoying.
They guy had the nerve to ask you why you were so angry when he burnt the last of the dinner you had. You had to go hungry for his stupidity for crying out loud.
The nerve!
You could hear him knock again and call out your name. “Please, open uuuup!” he begged. “I have no clue what I did wrong but I’m sorry and I want to know if you still love me!”
But….
“I also got some more mocha to make up for the batch I burnt.” He added.
You really couldn’t stay mad at him for long.
You opened the door and Lu-ten walked in with the air of big-headedness he always wore while you crossed your arms and watched him kick his shoes off and timidly approach you with a box in hand. “Still friends?” he asked with a pout.”
“I’m still pissed about the mochi but thanks.” was your clipped response. He grimaced, looking like a kicked puppy. You began to feel a little guilty now until he spoke up again.
“You know you can always buy a fresh set right?” he asked, walking after you. You set the box on the table, then motioned around your apartment. He stared back blankly and you tried to bite back a frustrated sigh. Typical, he still doesn’t understand.
“I can’t afford that stuff all the time, Lu.” You explained. You knew he could be the sort to get easily distracted and growing up with a rich family whose members you couldn’t bother remembering save Iroh. “The next time I can get myself some more is when I get my next pay check. The rest of my money needs to go to my tuition.
Lu-ten tilted his head to the side.
“But you’re already smart.” He pointed out.
You didn’t know if you wanted to face palm or blubber with embarrassment.
“I’m passing BECAUSE of my tuition! I suck at math, I mean, my middle school test scores will speak for me.” You stated, trying to fight the growing heat on your cheeks. Lu-ten shrugged nonchalantly.
“Okay. Though…you know you could have dropped out of math, right?”
“Yes.”
“And why didn’t you?”
“Because my parents are nuts and like seeing me suffer.”
He looked a little disturbed when you said that. “Seriously?” he asked, resting his hands on your shoulders, concern evident on his face. “Are they—why didn’t you tell me? You want me to call someone-”
“I’m not being abused-” you sputtered out. “They’re just incredibly pushy is all.” He still didn’t look convinced.
Like you said, he couldn’t take a hint.
But it was sweet of him, his concern that is. In the eight (and a half. He was VERY insistent you add the ‘and a half’ bit) months you knew him, first meeting him in the art club while he was on the run from Director Ozai’s lackeys after setting a stink bomb in his office. You let him hide simply because a) Ozai sucks and b) he was giving you the puppy dog eyes.
Also because Ozai sucked.
“Hey, they’re just looking out for me. Getting a decent job with a decent pay should be my priority now.” You continued as he let go of you. “I have some tea around, you want some? As a thank you for the Mochi.” Lu-ten perked up when you mentioned the tea, goofy grin spreading across his face.
“Black, oolong or puerh?” he asked. Your mind fizzled. What the hell was puerh?!
You stared at his excited face.
Gah, never mind.
“….just tea…” you replied stupidly. Lu-ten seemed to contemplate this answer.
“I’ll take it.” he decided, shuffling up to the loveseat and flopping over it, legs tangling on the back and arm rest. You bit back a scoff at his behavior (which was unsurprising since he treated the place like his own home) and slipped into the kitchen, putting the kettle on and heating the water up. You poked your head out of the kitchen.
“So why the sudden visit? I’m pretty sure you didn’t drop by to make it up for me with apology mochi.” You noted. From where you stood, you saw him turn his head to face you with a sheepish grin. He knew better than to lie or deny anything around you. Somehow you seemed to have a ‘Lu-ten is lying’ alarm in your mind that alerted you of any fibs he muttered.
Also, he was a terrible liar but it was best you didn’t mention that.
“Okay, yeah you got me.” He admitted. “I’m going to stop by at the daycare later in. I told Aunt Ursa I could babysit Zuko while she took Azula to the doctors.” You hummed in response. Ursa? That named sounded familiar; Lu-ten must have mentioned her in passing. Ah right, she was director Ozai’s wife. Lu-ten was (somehow) related to that asshole…
Wait…
Ozai has a kid?!
You turned to Lu-ten. He was chattering away about Zuko now; how wonderful and cute his cousin was.
The more you thought about the fact that Ozai had a kid, the more it didn’t sit well with you. The man was terrible with children and terrible as a person overall. You knew the relationship between him and his kid could be far from healthy.
“Hey Lu?” you spoke up after a while, placing the tea on the coffee table and sitting next to him after he got his legs out of the way. He hummed. “Your cousin…Zuko…he IS Ozai’s kid…right?” You knew he was but you really had to make sure. Lu-ten nodded, taking a sip.
“Yep.” He replied, popping the ‘p’. “Shocking, I know. But don’t worry, he’s nothing like his dad. Zuko’s a total sweetie.” He cracked grin, wiggling his brows. “Why? Are you worried about me?”
“You wish.” You snorted. “But seriously…he’s happy…right?”
Lu-ten frowned a little at the question. “I’m sure he is. Aunt Ursa loves him and as terrible a guy Ozai is Zuko is his kid. And he’s always happy when I’m around…”
That’s because it’s you, dumbass.
“…so he should be a happy kid!” he finished. He almost sounded like he was trying to convince himself and you didn’t really feel…content with his reply.
But you didn’t express it.
“Okay.” You mumbled instead. “So you prepped yourself? Got some games? Snacks?”
Lu-ten smiled and you could have sworn some nervous sweat started trailing down his temple.
“Uhhhh….no….?” he squeaked out, suddenly looking much smaller. You took a pensive sip of your drink.
“You are un-fucking-believable.” You stated as a matter of factly.
In the end, you decided to help Lu-ten after a lot of begging on his part. After calling Iroh up to let him know his (stupid) kid might be spending some time at your place (Iroh actually laughed cheekily and mumbled some very vague words about ‘young love’) and a quick trip to the supermarket, you walked Lu-ten to the daycare to collect his cousin.
You knew a few things about Zuko. That he was shy, that he liked spicy food and that he was six years old. That aside you really didn’t expect him to be so…
…small.
He was so small, too small for a six year old kid. But he had an excited smile on his face when he tackled Lu-ten down and the two of them shared a big hug. Zuko tensed and fell silent when he noticed you hanging back though, smile faltering and falling altogether. “Who’s that?” he asked. Lu-ten glanced at you.
“This is my friend, Zuko. They’re going to help me take care of you.” Lu-ten replied. You held out a hand and smiled, giving him your name. Zuko shrank back and buried his head into Lu-ten’s shoulder. He kept glancing at you every now and then, eyes flickering down every time you caught him.
…
…
This is criminal.
No human should be this cute.
Must protect…small…child…oh no…
“Zuko is a turtleduck.” You blurted out before processing your words properly. Lu ten glanced over at you, eyes wide with blatant amusement and confusion mixed into one while Zuko tilted his head, squirming a little to get more comfortable in his cousin’s hold.
“I like turtleducks.” He mumbled softly, not quite looking at you. You nodded.
You…didn’t really know what to do around kids.
“Turtleducks?” Lu-ten mumbled incredulously. “What about dragons? Dragons are cool. Turtleducks are…small…and fuzzy...” You glanced over at him with a raised brow and quickly elbowed him when the child in his arms slumped. Lu-ten noticed. “…And that’s precisely WHY they are awesome animals…” he added quickly. “They can be really terrifying when you hurt someone they care about.”
“Mom says that too.” Zuko muttered, his voice hushed. You smiled.
“Yes, they do. Lu-ten fell into a duck pond and experienced it himself.” You said. Lu-ten huffed and walked past you, to your apartment. Zuko looked a little intrigued.
“Just so you know, it was an accident.” He stated drily. You cracked a cheeky smile.
“It was karma for stealing my chocolate.” You corrected. Lu-ten pouted and you stifled back a laugh. Zuko buried his head into his shoulder again, but you caught the tiny smile on his face.
Zuko was a serious child.
That was the first thing you noticed about his behavior.
He liked to have fun, but he was careful with everything he handled. He don’t touch random objects, he didn’t make too much noise and he didn’t talk too much even though there were a few instances he may have wanted to. It was almost like he was afraid he was going to do something wrong.
Lu-ten had stepped out to get some takeout. Zuko looked a little confused and upset when he was asked what he wanted, like it was something so unfamiliar and strange. He didn’t act out though, but he didn’t stop looking at his hands. You had felt an unpleasant twist in your stomach when he did that and it didn’t let up when he refused to speak up, muttering a silent ‘sorry’ each time.
“How about some pie? You like pie, right?” Lu-ten asked. Zuko seemed to have brightened up a bit and he nodded. Lu ten smiled. You pursed your lips.
Everything about this felt wrong.
He was sitting on the couch now, reading a picture book you had lying around. You were sitting next to him. “Do you like the theater?” you asked when you spotted him staring at the watercolor drawings of the two dragons. ‘Love amongst the Dragons’ was a pretty famous play, something your parents took you to see every year. Zuko nodded and muttered something under his breath. You frowned.
“You can speak up, Zuko.” You stated, voice soft. He flinched, ducking his head down.
“Sorry.” He blurted out. You felt your lips twitched downwards. He noticed. “Did I do something wrong?” he asked, looking small. Your throat went dry.
“You did nothing wrong! Why did you think you did?”
He didn’t answer.
Zuko didn’t like certain food items.
He couldn’t swallow the chicken or the mashed potatoes, but he never really spoke up until Lu-ten pointed it out. He didn’t seem to like squishy food or dried meat and he was afraid of saying so. It wasn’t because it tasted bad, he tried to say, it just felt wrong.
You nodded in understanding and gave him some of the soup you ordered for yourself instead, opting to finish his kiddie meal. Zuko ate that with no problems.
“I’m sorry for being a brat.” He muttered in the end. Lu ten took his hand.
“You weren’t being a brat.” He said. “Don’t ever say that, okay?” Zuko didn’t look like he wanted to agree and kept staring at his bowl.
Zuko really liked theater.
That was something that got him talking animatedly, to the point where he was spinning around you as you turned on your laptop to watch a play you had saved up. He loved the costumes the actors wore and the stories they tried to convey. He could barely sit still during the whole show, smiling the first genuine smile you saw on him.
He named all the set pieces used, things even you, an eighteen year old was completely unaware of.
He remembered all the roles and characters, from the protagonists to the miscellaneous and you listened to him chatter on.
Lu-ten said Zuko like the theater, but you never assumed it was to this extent.
He shot you a smug look over Zuko’s messy head and mouthed an ‘Isn’t he amazing?’. You mouthed a ‘yes’ back.
Even after the play ended and you set your laptop aside, he didn’t stop talking about it.
Zuko didn’t like talking about his father.
When you asked him about Ozai, Lu-ten suppressed his gagging in the background. Zuko didn’t look very comfortable with the situation.
He actually looked scared.
Ozai was like a ghost, hinted here and there but he was never mentioned by name. And when he was, it was always in sentences that didn’t sit well with you.
“Father wouldn’t like that.” He had said when you offered to take him to the park.
“Father hates this.”
“Father hates that.”
“Father will get angry.”
At this point, you were sick of Ozai seeming to dictate and hold back Zuko’s decisions, even when that prick wasn’t around. Lu-ten agreed with you but you didn’t seem to see it the way you did. He was always the optimistic sort and to him, even someone as terrible at Ozai couldn’t be as bad.
It just made you hurt even more.
And finally, Zuko always flinched.
You saw him do so when you tried to collect a bowl from the counter. He had tensed up and hunched his shoulders, eyes squeezed shut as he muttered apologies.
“I wasn’t going to hurt you.” you tried to say.
He looked apprehensive and he didn’t stop crying. You had taken him by the hand and led him to the living room where you and Lu-ten calmed him down. “Why did you think I was going to hurt you?” you asked silently, hand on his shoulder. He looked at his feet, eyebrows scrunching up.
“I did something wrong.” He replied.
“You didn’t do anything wrong, Zuko.” You tried to say. He still didn’t look you in the eye; he rarely looked people in the eye now that you thought about it.
“I did something wrong.” He insisted. You looked over at Lu-ten with a hint of exasperation. He mirrored your own expression but smiled anyway, scooping Zuko up.
“Heads up, Zuko, they have an anti-self-deprecation sensor that calls people out for being too hard on themselves. You don’t want them to tackle you down with slobbery kisses and hugs, do you?” he asked. Zuko’s face scrunched up.
“Slobbery kisses?” he repeated.
“The worst.” Lu-ten agreed. Zuko glanced at you, mildly horrified and you grinned and puckered up. Zuko squeaked and buried his head inside Lu-ten’s shoulders, begging him to get him away. “Oh no!” Lu-ten gasped. “They’re coming to do the deed! Run Zuko, run!”
Really, dumbass?
He let Zuko down on his feet and the boy took off across the living room. You chased after him. “Wait!” you called out, playing along while Lu-ten followed after. “I still have encouragement and affection to give you!”
“Cousin, save me!” Zuko garbled out, but there was a bright glint in his eyes, like he was enjoying this. Lu-ten let out a sudden bark of laughter and tackled you down while Zuko ducked under a table, giggling. You groaned under the weight of all the dumbass while Lu-ten chuckled.
“Surrender, heathen!” he demanded. You patted the floor.
“I surrender. Now get off me!” you relented. He rolled off of you while Zuko crawled out of the table and tentatively approached the two of you. Lu-ten pulled him into a hug, grinning stupidly.
Ursa came over to pick Zuko up.
She was really pretty and you could see a hint of resemblance between the two of them. While Zuko had Ozai’s jawline and nose, he had the gentle angle to his eyes and the set to his eyebrows that Ursa had.
So…when you thought about it...Zuko was…soft Ozai…?
Okay…
She was also pretty nice, thanking you and Lu-ten for going through the trouble to look after him. You dare say she looked a little reluctant when it came to taking him back home and Zuko had gone silent again when he realized that too, glancing at you and Lu-ten as if hoping he could stay a little longer. Lu-ten grinned and waved goodbye. You just smiled, watching him scramble into the car.
“I…he’s a strange kid…” you blurted out when they were out of sight and Lu-ten was pulling on his shoes. He looked at you, musing over your sentence.
“In a good way…?” he asked.
“I’m worried about him.”
“He makes a lot of people worry. He has a way when it comes to making people like him.” There was hint of pride in his voice. You knew Lu-ten wasn’t going to get it. He had a good parent like Iroh to raise him. Lu-ten grew up with love and he grew up with support and that may have built up an idealism that you couldn’t find yourself expressing like he did.
To Lu-ten, his family wasn’t perfect but it wasn’t hellfire either. To Lu-ten, he could never see people who shared his own blood harm another. You didn’t tell Lu-ten about your worries. A part of you wanted to shut up and not jump to conclusions.
But you knew you couldn’t shut up about the angry bruise on his upper arm, purple and red, hidden away under his sleeve.
You watched Lu-ten leave, then pulled up your phone.
Maybe Iroh could help.