Chapter Text
“All I’m saying is that we don’t have to go to some fancy cabin in the woods to commemorate our last year! We have business to attend to instead,'" Remus said, looking up from the textbook he had been studying from.
"Do we?" asked Sirius from where he had draped himself across from the study session, "Like what?"
"Hmm… I don't know, maybe getting a job? Defeating a fascist leader? Just brainstorming here, but those seem like pretty important things to me. More important than a week-long excursion at some cabin that Prongs managed to whine his way into borrowing for the—Hey!" James had thrown a wad of parchment at him.
"Don’t get your knickers in a twist, Moony. It’s for six days. The wizarding world will still be here after six days,” said James. He had been pretending to study with Remus, but he had long since given up on actually trying to absorb any information. “Plus, Lily mentioned that she needed a nice long break after this year.”
“Evans dictates way too much of your life,” Sirius pointed out, “but you’re also completely correct. We need a break.”
“Fine. You guys have obviously made up your mind. What do you think, Wormtail? Do you really think it’s a good idea to go to this thing?” Remus asked, looking desperately across the room where Peter was seated on the floor near the fireplace, unusually quiet.
"What? Oh, I'm not going."
"What do you mean?” Sirius asked, finally sitting up from the couch, “It’s a Marauders outing. We’re the Marauders. You’re a Marauder! You have to go.”
“No, I don’t. I’m busy that week. Plus, you guys would just ignore me the entire time anyways,” Peter said, standing up and gathering his books.
Remus stood to meet him. “Now, wait a moment. We don’t do that.”
Peter pushed past him. He stopped at the stairs that led up to the boys’ dormitory. “Yes, you all do. James spends the whole time swooning after Evans, Marlene and Dorcas get drunk and snog in the corner, and you and Sirius spend the whole night flirting with each other. Mary’s the only one who even looks at me, but she just looks at me like I’m a child. I’m over it. I’m just there because you feel bad for me. Well, stop. I get when I’m not wanted. I’ll leave you lot to have fun. I’ll see you later, Remus.”
And with that, he disappeared into his room, leaving the other Marauders in shell shocked silence.
For the rest of the school year, which was only a few more weeks, Peter Pettigrew was nowhere to be found. There were rumors floating around that he had gone off and hidden with the muggles, or joined the Death Eaters, but Remus secretly hoped neither was true. He had always had so much hope for Peter, regardless of how other people thought he’d end up. Sure, he was a cowardly pushover at times, but he was also a Marauder. If Remus had learned anything at Hogwarts in his seven years, it was that the Marauders would be there for each other in the end. He just hoped that Peter would remember that.
James had taken his disappearance especially personally. “He’s right, you know,” he had mentioned one night, when the three of them had retired to their beds. Remus had taken to pointedly avoiding looking at the empty bed that used to house one of his best friends, plus the empty wall where Peter used to keep his Quidditch posters when he was younger. He had upgraded them to muggle comic book posters as he got older, embracing the muggle culture that the other three had been obsessing over for the past few years. Once in a while Remus’s eyes would skim over to where he expected to see Peter. The strange thing was, the Peter he expected to see was the one when the Marauders were thirteen, all wide, toothy grins and untamed hair.
“What he said about us,” James continued, not even bothering to see if the others were awake, “We’ve been shitty friends.”
Remus could hear Sirius roll over. “Would you like to provide some examples, Prongs?”
Remus peeked out from the curtain only to faintly see James and Sirius doing the same thing. He left his bed and sat on the carpet near the foot of Sirius’ bed. Sirius and James both followed his lead, all of them huddled together. The moonlight peeking out of the curtains was their only source of light, none of them wanting or needing it to be brighter.
“We left Wormtail behind. We all spent time with each other, but he was always the odd man out,” said James once they had all settled.
“That’s not true,” Sirius said.
“Yes it is,” James said, “We were always together or with other friends, and Peter was left behind.”
“No,” Remus said, “That’s not how it went.”
“What do you mean?”
"Sure, we left him out of things, but he never wanted to go anywhere with us. He distanced himself from us and locked himself up in the dorm. It had been like this for a year and a half. You can't fully blame yourself for his disappearance. He had been wanting to disappear from us for a long time. He just didn't have an excuse."
"And then he found one," Sirius added, "He found one and left us to blame ourselves."
"I know you guys are just trying to make me feel better," James said, "but it's not really working. Maybe we should just cancel the trip. I'm sure that the girls will understand."
Remus nodded, secretly happy that the trip was being cancelled. He had too much to worry about. He looked over at Sirius, and quickly changed his mind.
Sirius looked crestfallen . Remus had noticed how excited he had been about going, and he made a decision right then and there. “No,” he said, “We should still go. It’ll boost our morale.”
The other two both looked at Remus with hopeful eyes. Now I feel bad for wanting to cancel.
“Are you sure?” Sirius asked. He grabbed Remus’ hand.
“Absolutely,” Remus said. There was a moment, one brief, flash of a moment where Remus almost thought they were going to kiss, but that moment was very brutally slaughtered by James yanking both of their free hands into his, pulling them away from each other and toward James.
“Great!” he said, “Then let’s get packing. We’ve only got two days until we graduate from Hogwarts! That means we have a week and a half until our trip. We have to be ready. I’d better go get the girls and…” he trotted off, mumbling to himself as he went.
“Do you think he knows that the sun’s not even up yet?” Sirius asked, his hand still in Remus’.
“Definitely not. He doesn’t even know what day it is. We still have four days until we finish the year.”
“And he’s the best Evans could do?”
“Apparently.”
"Here we are," James said, "The Great Outdoors."
Remus restrained himself from making a snarky comment. The utter excitement in Sirius' eyes was enough for him to stay silent. He couldn't ruin this for him. For all of them. Marlene and Dorcas were just as excited as the boys. Mary had politely, and wisely, declined to go with them, making Remus feel intensely jealous of her freedom. It seemed like the only person who agreed with Remus was Lily.
"What are you waiting for?" Marlene asked, trying and failing to hide her enthusiasm.
"Yeah Prongs, show us around," Sirius said, not even bothering to hide his.
"Alright then, let's do this."
James dramatically led them to the front door of the cabin. It was small. It was only marginally bigger than the Shrieking Shack. Remus hadn't been worried when he first saw the size, since he knew what magic could do, but when James opened the door to reveal that the cabin was not enchanted in any way, he got a little concerned.
"James?" Lily asked.
"Yes, my love? Is it as wonderful as you thought?"
"How the fuck are we supposed to fit six people in this?" she asked.
James rushed to the hallway, where there were three doors. "I already took that into account. There's three bedrooms, so we can all share!"
Share? Remus thought, This is what I get for being agreeable for once.
"Wait," Marlene asked, "Who's sharing with who?"
Remus' eyes widened, Please, anybody but Sirius. I can't do that today. Not for a whole week.
James' smile widened into something that, if Remus didn't know any better, seemed mischievous. “I thought that since we’re already split into couples, we could share the rooms that way.”
There was a general murmur of agreement, most of the others being too tired to really care at that point. Most of them.
“Hey, wait a second! You guys might be split into couples, but Sirius and I aren’t,” Remus said, “Why don’t we get a say in this?”
“Remus, you’re the one who said we should go,” James reminded him. Remus winced, remembering his actions. The glint in James’ eye told Remus everything he needed to know. James was not going to let this go, and if Remus did anything against it he would probably just make himself look foolish for his previous suggestion. Maybe Peter wasn’t the only one who noticed Remus’ interest in Sirius. James may be oblivious, but he’s not stupid.
Sirius turned to him. “It’s fine, right Moony? We share a room all the time.”
Remus didn’t think it was fair that Sirius could look so convincing when Remus was so tired. He sighed, “Alright, fine. Let’s just all get to bed.”
Dorcas grinned, “Great. I’ll see you lot tomorrow,” she said, pulling Marlene into the closest bedroom by her skirt. James patted the other Marauders on either shoulder, and Lily kissed them both on the cheek before wishing them goodnight, and they both made their way to the next bedroom.
“Well,” Sirius said, “We might as well settle in.”
Remus nodded and led the way into the room. The room that had one bed. He would have to share with Sirius.
“Fuck.”