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It was a sunny, cool Saturday in New York when all that coding Tony had done finally paid off.
This was a very good thing, because Tony had… not exactly been doing all that well lately—after Siberia—and he frankly very much needed a win.
That coding had honestly been done in a two-day frenzy about two days after ultron, but it had been amended about two months ago after Tony had come to the realisation that Thor, notorious for knowing everything thanks to that swordy-eye guy, hadn’t made a peep during the whole… thing.
So Tony added Point Break as well, just to be safe.
And then he waited.
Well, not exactly waited so much as forgot thanks to a heart-stopping series of events in which the spider-child he somehow became a father figure to managed to almost get himself killed no less than fifteen times.
Like seriously, did the kid somehow get born with zero survival instincts or something?
But the point is, the algorithm ended up pretty close to the absolute back of his mind.
Until that sunny, cool Saturday when the alert finally went off; a small, forest green notification popping up on his phone as he aimlessly scrolled, just as he always did for fifteen minutes before he got up.
It took a few seconds for it to click, but as soon as it did he was bolting out of bed, not even bothering to put on a pair of pants as he rushed down to his lab, calling to FRIDAY as he did so.
“Fri, if you would be a dear and turn on all GPS systems in the lab, set servers to begin triangulating position using data from algorithm; green lightning, run said data to display screens one through seven, patch into avengers servers and start updating logs Banner and Point Break with all related information, and get my Lab coffee maker started on a extra hot, extra sweet quintuple shot hazelnut milk cappuccino."
“Right away boss.” came her prompt response, and by the time tony stepped into the lab, the screens were lit up, the servers were humming in the background, and an extra large, extra hot, extra sweet, quintuple shot hazelnut milk cappuccino was waiting for him.
Oh, and Thor was on the screens.
Thor, in a hoodie and sweats, taking a selfie with two young women and flashing a peace sign at the camera.
Thor, who hadn’t been seen since he left a very large and very hard to get rid of scorch mark on Tony’s nice new lawn.
Thor who was now apparently wandering around—in New York, according to the GPS readings, without a care in the world.
Well at least the guy was alive.
It was then that tony started laughing at the sheer hilarity of the situation, and that was how Peter found him; clad in a velvet bathrobe, a t-shirt with “the name’s bond, ionic bond, taken—not shared” printed on it in big, bold letters, and iron man boxers, with ducky slippers thrown on top of it all.
Tony, however, did not notice peter until he announced his presence with a tiny cough.
“Oh—shit. Kid. Right. Lab day today.”
Peter just nodded.
It was all too evident by the gleeful look on his face that he was committing this glorious sight to memory.
“Kid.” Tony said, and Peter shook his head, coming back to reality.
“Oh! Sorry sir, I guess I missed the memo.”
Tony just sighed. he knew all too well where this was going.
“What memo?” he said, with the all-suffering tone of a parent who knows exactly what’s coming next, but is humouring their child nonetheless.
“The one about it being pajama day?” Peter said innocently, but the cheeky grin on his face kinda ruined that whole look.
“Smartass.” Tony gestured to the coffee machine in the corner.
“Go crazy kid. Stocked up on chocolate sprinkles, because apparently I share my lab with a demon child.”
Peter bounced a little as he headed off, before getting to work on the hyper-sweet monstrosity that the kid called ‘coffee.’
“So…” Peter began as he poured copious amounts of caramel syrup. “Can I ask?”
Tony sighed. “Does it matter what I say?”
“No. What’s with the getup?”
“What’s with yours?” Tony shot back, gesturing to Peter’s neon corduroys and hot pink turtleneck. The kid just shrugged.
“Lost a bet, but I think this works for me.”
“Do I wanna know?”
“Probably not.”
Tony considered this for a moment. “Ah, what the heck. Lay it on me.”
“I said I could fit fifty cheezies in my mouth. MJ begged to differ.”
Oh. that was… not horrid? “Seesh kid, you had me worried for a second. I thought you were gonna say you backflipped off a bridge or something.”
Peter put on a face of mock-offense. “Me?” he placed a hand over his heart. “Mr. Stark I would never! and—- OMG is that THOR?” Peter dropped whatever it was he was going to say, and—coffee in hand—practically ran over to the screens, webbing his chair to him as he did and plopping down, setting his coffee on the desk and propping himself up with his elbows.
“Yep.”
“Is he… wearing sweatpants?”
“Yep.”
“And a hoodie?”
“Yep.”
“Taking a selfie!?”
“Yep.”
“Making a PEACE SIGN!?”
“Yep.”
“But… OMG Mr. Stark did Green Lightning finally get activated? Where even is Thor? Did Dr. Banner show up too? When did it happen? How long since? What are you going to do next does he seem ok why is he taking a selfie?”
“Jeez, Underoos, calm down.” Tony chuckled. “Ok, so: yes, New York, no, this morning, about fifteen minutes, but the post is from about two hours ago, I don’t know, yes, and I have no freaking clue.”
Peter was definitely bouncing now, full of barely contained glee, but he turned to Tony after a second.
“What do you mean ‘I don’t know?’”
“I mean, I literally don’t know. This wasn’t on my schedule.” The kid knew he didn’t have a schedule, but it was a figure of speech.
“Well… why is he here, anyway? Maybe start there?”
And as per usual, the kid was spot fricking on. Tony thought for a second. It couldn’t have been to see them—him, Thor would’ve popped in by now, and if he was visiting the other avengers he would’ve surely visited Tony too. Thor was like that. And there couldn’t be any sort of alien issue, Tony had tapped into all the major broadcast frequencies months ago in order to get a heads up in case anything happened that A) He could help with, or B) Would put earth in danger.
So why was he here?
“Wait… Mr. Stark? Is that Loki? Like, actually Loki?”
Tony looked, half ready to tell the kid that no, it was just a cosplayer or another greasy-haired egotistical guy. No way it could be Loki, he was dead. Like, really dead. Goodness knows Thor had cried about it for months. It was actually kinda sweet, especially since Loki had apparently died saving Point Break’s ass or something.
But, that wasn’t exactly what he saw.
“Um… yeah. Yeah, kid. That’s Loki alright.”
***
And it just kept getting weirder.
Apparently Thor had been seen entering a townhome on Bleeker Street, then thirty minutes later there was a sighting of him on some remote Norwegian cliff.
The latest was something about an energy disturbance near Tønsberg, which, coincidentally, was where the Tesseract had first shown up back in the thirties.
Peter had grabbed popcorn a couple minutes back, and for some reason was now dipping it into his death-coffee as he watched what he had coined the ‘Thor-Dar’ and fiddled with an upgrade to his web-shooters.
And Tony? Well, Tony was staring at his phone, trying really, incredibly hard to dial one specific number, and finding himself quite unable to do so. Every minute or so, Peter would turn around and give him an encouraging thumbs-up, even though the kid had no idea who he was calling.
Eventually, after about thirty minutes (twenty-seven, but who’s counting) of stalling, he pressed call.
It only rang for three seconds before she picked up.
“Hello?” she said, her voice bleary with sleep. She must be somewhere with a large time difference. It was oddly nostalgic; she had only started allowing herself to be tired, to be vulnerable with them all about four months before everything went down.
“Heeeeeey Nat,” Tony said with what he hoped was a casual tone.
There was a slight rustling of sheets, but no creaks from a bed or the floor.
“Tony.”
“So… funny story,” He started, heart pounding, but Nat hadn’t hung up yet, so he supposed there was still hope. “You wouldn’t happen to remember project Greenie, would you?”
More rustling sheets, and when Nat spoke next, her voice was tight, but not with guardedness or anger. “…Yes. I do.”
“Nat, I’m sorry. It's not Bruce.” There was a muffled thump. “It is, however, our other missing guy.” more rustling sheets, and a creak that tony could only assume was a bed-frame.
“You’re kidding.” There was just a hint of wonder in there, and that was how he knew she wasn’t being sarcastic.
“Nope. Updated the protocol a bit ago to include Point Break. was getting a lil’ worried about him, seeing as we haven’t heard anything in like, years.”
There was a pause, then, quietly; “I was too.”
“So anyway, how fast do you think you can—“
“Give me five hours.” She said, and then the phone clicked off.
That was… Tony didn’t know what it was.
But it certainly felt different.
If he was an optimistic person, he’d say it felt like progress.
***
Nat got there in four and a half.
Tony had left peter safe, or as safe as that kid could be, in the lab with another latte (Tony had made it, so it was—much to Peter’s dismay—less sugary. Coffee was still coffee though) while he headed out to the rooftop after pulling on a pair of pyjama pants.
It was odd. Tony hadn’t been up there in… a while.
The landing Quinjet was a stark reminder of that fact, but it was oddly comforting as well. It was one of the smaller models, but he could still see every seam where he painstakingly welded it together, just as he had with all the crafts.
Just as he had with the one Bruce had been in.
Those complicated emotions only got worse as the gangplank lowered and Nat stepped out. He couldn’t really decide if he wanted to hug her or punch her.
Well, both would get him a knife to the gut, so neither was probably the best option.
Nat’s hair had grown out a little more, falling in bright red waves down to a point about a half-a-foot from her waist, and instead of the expected combat suit, she was wearing what looked to be one of Wanda’s cardigans over a black shirt with red joggers.
“Tony,” she said as she walked up to him, and if she knew how much it meant to him, (no matter how much he would deny it) to be ‘Tony’ instead of ‘Stark,’ she didn’t show it.
“Nat.”
They set off towards the lab without a word. Nat, as always, was silent, but Tony cracked halfway there.\
“So…. What have you been up to?” Nat shrugged, but she didn’t look put out.
“I’ve… been in Spain. Barcelona.” She said slowly, and Tony could tell she was making the same kind of effort he was.
Didn’t make it any less awkward though.
“Nice weather.” He said, and Nat made an agreeing noise.
They walked for a couple more seconds before she spoke again.
“I headed there after we broke the others out.” She sounded like she always did, but being around Nat for as long as Tony had clued him in on her tells. She was a little hesitant, just a bit guarded. She was nervous.
Tony blinked, humming in approval. “Good. I was hoping you would.”
It was Nat’s turn to blink in surprise.
“Oh?”
“Lemme ask you something, were there any problems with the security system?”
“No, everything was down…” she trailed off, the answer obviously coming to her. “…For maintenance.”
Tony hummed again. “Funny thing, that.”
Nat actually gave a tiny smile.
They arrived at the lab a minute later, and thankfully Peter was still alive.
He dropped his screwdriver as he saw them.
“Tony?” Nat asked, quite simply. Peter squeaked.
“My intern. Peter.” Tony said, as Peter’s eyes went huge and his leg started to bounce.
“Popcorn?” He managed to squeak out, holding the absolutely massive bowl and offering it to the actual Black Widow. Only Peter.
And Nat visibly softened.
“Don’t mind if I do.” She pulled up a chair and flopped into it, feet propped up on Tony’s desk as she grabbed a handful of popcorn from a still starstruck Peter.
“Oh my gosh…” Peter whispered under his breath
“So,” She said, tossing a kernel into her mouth. “How’s spider-manning treating you?”
Peter squeaked again, and looked to Tony, who just shook his head.
“She’s a spy, kid. Like; the spy.” Peter simply nodded, before turning to Nat and regaling her with the story of that mamma cat and her kittens he got out of a pipe a week ago.
And Nat was smiling.
Who would’ve thought?
***
Nat was understandably both relieved and very worried.
The latter was notably quite focused on the Loki issue.
“He was dead, right? I didn’t imagine that?”
“Nope, definitely dead according to Point Break.”
“Alright, just clarifying.”
It was odd, how the two of them fell back into their old dynamic within a few minutes. Tony working on his extra-stellar receiver while Nat perched on the couch, occasionally calling out a suggestion Tony never would’ve thought of on his own as she continued to talk with Peter.
As for Peter, he was in Avengers fanboy paradise, and he kept shooting Mr. Stark incredulous and awestruck looks out of the corner of his eye.
Tony eventually ended up ordering pizza, and the four of them (Pepper had come down a few minutes ago, much to Nat’s delight) munched on it as Peter laid out his theory for all of Thor’s disjointed ideas in great detail. There were no less than three dragons and four missiles involved.
That was when the E.A.S.I.E.R (Extremely Applicable Simplified Intuitive Extra-stellar Reciever) went off, a small array of yellow LEDs flashing along the spine as a small hologram projected from the platform beside the disc.
Tony swiped the broadcast to the larger screens, and his jaw promptly dropped.
Grandmaster overthrown!
Sakaar in chaos after shocking rebellion
By R’Ilia Wir Janas
Xandar Free Press
4 Minutes ago
The Planet of Sakaar, best known for it’s inhumane gladiator tournaments and eccentric dictator, will no longer be known for the latter, as En Dwi Gast, better known as the Grandmaster, was removed from power after a shocking series of events involving the ‘Lord of Thunder,’ a recent addition to the gladiatorial contests, his adopted brother ‘Loki,’ a scrapper (code 142) previously working for the Grandmaster, an unidentified Terran man, and the Grandmaster’s prized Champion.
Sources close to the seat of Sakaarian power say that the events were set in motion after Loki landed on Sakaar roughly two weeks ago, after which he promptly made his way to the Grandmaster, who became his quote-un-quote “sugar daddy.” The Lord of Thunder arrived roughly two days ago, secured by Scrapper 142, and was “very belligerent,” says Gana Gentra, a guest of the Grandmaster at the time of the Lord of Thunder’s arrival. “He and the Grandmaster’s fling seemed to know each other well. I recall there was some sort of aggressively whispered conversation, before he was sent off.”
The Lord of Thunder continued to make a name for himself, with his next move turning out to be demanding a match with Sakaar’s notorious champion. Kiran Nandoo was there at the time of the match. “he started out, you know, all serious and what not, but as soon as the Champion came out he was all ‘YESSSSSSSSS’ and stuff. Looked real happy. He called something up to the grandmaster and his new fling, then kept trying to… talk to the champion? i don’t know, I think there was even an attempt at a lullaby at some point. Eventually, when that didn’t work, he went at ‘em. Did pretty well too, but fainted pretty suddenly and lost.”
The champion has reportedly been on Sakaar for around two or three years, and sources say his arrival was as mysterious as the rest of his traits. Reports indicate he crash landed on the planet in a ship of unidentifiable origin. He was promptly taken to the Grandmaster by none other than Scrapper 142, where he quickly built a reputation as a formidable opponent.
The Lord of Thunder was then taken to the champion’s quarters for unknown reasons, where he would then meet Scrapper 142 once again, as she and the champion are reportedly quite close. we are unaware of what transpired in the rooms, but a source claims they saw the Lord of Thunder escape through a broken window at around what would have been roughly fifteen to thirty minutes after Scrapper 142’s arrival. Eyewitnesses also claim they saw the champion charging through the palace at what would have been the same time. “It was the most agitated i’d seen him outside of the ring.” Says a maid in the palace. “He was stomping around, shouting ‘puny friend stay.’ eventually he left through the front doors.”
That was the last time Sakaar’s champion would be seen. The Grandmaster, upon learning of his champion’s disappearance, promptly dispatched Loki and Scrapper 142 to find the missing gladiators, calling it “a ‘who’s gonna get him first’ situation” A passing soldier a few minutes after reported seeing Scrapper 142 knock Loki out after a brief tussle.
The next sighting of the Lord of Thunder came at a parade held in honour of the missing Champion. “He was wearing a scarf around his head, but it wasn’t exactly a very good disguise.” Said an attendee of the parade. The Lord of Thunder had been joined at this point by an unidentified man in reportedly ‘too tight leather pants’ with curly, light brown hair and a science pun t-shirt. Nobody we talked to on Sakaar can remember seeing this man at any previous point.
Scrapper 142 reportedly rendezvoused with the two at the parade, and in an unexpected development decided to side with them, leading them to her apartment. A neighbour, who was home at the time, recalls hearing “a sort of clinking sound, a voice—sounded sarcastic, a thud, like something had been thrown, and then a shattering glass sort of thing a few minutes later.”
The next time the three were seen, they had been joined once again by Loki, and were spotted in an alley before splitting up, scrapper 142 heading to the gladiator barracks and the Lord of Thunder and Loki making their way to the palace. it is unknown to where the unidentified man headed.
Multiple guards reported seeing the reportedly adoptive brothers making their way through the palace, including one point where a battalion was surprised by a most unconventional tactic. “He [the Lord of Thunder] came through the doors, half carrying the Grandmaster’s new fling, and was calling all sorts of stuff about how he [Loki] was dying, and how we had to ‘get help.’ Then he threw him [Loki] at us.”
It was roughly fifteen minutes later when it was announced that the Lord of Thunder had stolen the Grandmaster’s personal pleasure vessel. The unidentified man reportedly was flying said craft as Scrapper 142 and the Lord of Thunder participated in the mid-air takedown of the pursuing ships, aided by a blast from the Grandmaster’s firework birthday cannon attached to the stolen vessel.
After evading their pursuers, the craft—with the Lord of Thunder and Scrapper 142 now safely back on board, flew directly into the largest of Sakaar’s many wormholes, in a utterly nonsensical move. A wormhole-travel expert, however, says that the ship they stole just so happens to be one of the few on Sakaar that could survive that journey.
It was at this time that the ‘prisoners with jobs’— as the Grandmaster referred to the gladiators— broke free from their barracks and stormed the palace, armed with a variety of weaponry. The Grandmaster’s guards, distracted by the midair activity, were caught of guard and swiftly taken into the custody of the revolting gladiators, who promptly took control of the palace. The Grandmaster attempted to flee, and we are as of now unaware of where exactly he is.
Iriga Q’lis, a yittarbian and former gladiator, was appointed as the interim leader of the planet, and she quickly set about securing her new title as roughly half the gladiators stole another ship, the Ark, and made their way off the planet.
Sakaar now lies in chaos as Q’lis attempts to secure her throne, aided by a loyal group of advisors and a steadily growing fanbase of civilians tired of the way things were. Q’lis has pledged to help any on Sakaar who wish to return to their homes, despite the planet’s location in a time-warped region and the possibility that some may no longer have homes to go back to.
There was a small photo attached to the article, a grainy image of someone who was unmistakably Thor, in the midst of a wild parade.
The parade was full of green, and people waving around likenesses of the Hulk.
And Bruce was behind him.
In Tony’s pants.
Yeah… he had nothing.
“So. Nat. Looks like we found Brucie after all.”
Nat could only nod as Peter stared with increasing glee.
***
“Tony.”
“No.”
“Look, I’ll admit I’m a little ticked at Steve too, but he has a right to know.”
“Does he?”
“He’s been worried too.”
“Well that’s new.”
“Tony… Thor, with a very alive Loki, somehow found Bruce and overthrew the dictator of a gladiator planet. And, we still don’t know why he was on earth. Look, I get why you’re mad, I really do, but something is obviously going on.”
“No shit. Still, no.” Tony fiddled with a screwdriver as he talked, finalising the details on the upgrades to E.A.S.I.E.R that would allow him to not just receive messages, but send them. Behind him, Peter was trying to find the broadcast frequency for The Commodore, the ship Thor and Bruce had stolen, through a bit of patching into satellite frequencies around Sakaar.
“Look, you’d want to know, right? I'm not saying invite him over, but why not tell him and the others—Clint especially, he’d want to know—to be on standby, in the very small case something comes up.”
Tony stilled. That was an annoyingly good point. And when Nat said she wouldn’t invite him over, she meant it. she’d physically block him if it came to it.
“Fine. On two conditions,” he said. Nat inclined her head, gesturing for him to continue. “One, you do the talking, I am not speaking to him.” Nat nodded easily. “Two, you get Rhodey and Vision as well.” Nat blinked.
Was that not already the plan?”
Tony cracked a smile, choosing to ignore Peter quietly chanting “hug, hug, hug.” in the background.
He’d missed her.
***
Nat called Rhodey first. He was there within the hour, and doubled over laughing within the first five minutes after his arrival. Tony was by now on his third cup of coffee.
“He, he overthrows an alien dictator who is also Loki’s sugar daddy with a firework birthday cannon!” He wheezed. “And Bruce just happens to be there!”
Nat had contacted Vision as well, who was on his way, but she had only now found Steve’s phone number (Tony had literally just remembered the burner phone) and was calling him as Rhodey chortled on the couch and Peter worked on a batch of Skittle cookies. They did not smell appetizing.
“Steve.” Nat suddenly said, and Tony, despite himself, listened a little closer.
There was a pause.
“Yes it’s Nat.” She examined her nails. “I’m a spy, Steve. I can find a phone number. Why do you want to know? Yes, I’m with him right now. Well, he needed one of us, and he can’t exactly talk to you, now can he? It’s a long story. Look, Steve. I know said I was going off the grid for a bit, but this is serious. No, Tony’s not dying. Nobody is dead or dying. Rogers, give me two seconds to explain before you go full catastrophe please. Where are you? Ok. Right so, remember protocol greenie? Yeah. Yeah. Not just bruce. Yeah. It’s a long story. He showed up on a twitter post this morning. Yep. New York. Latest we heard he overthrew an alien dictator with Bruce, who somehow became a gladiator on an alien planet as the Hulk. Nothing for now, just remain on standby in case anything happens. Just figured you’d want to be informed. Oh and could you let Clint know? I know he’s retired but… yeah. Yeah he’d want to know. Alright. Ciao.”
Peter mouthed ‘ciao’ in wonder in the background as Tony made his way to Nat, with perhaps a bit more defensive swagger than usual.
“How’d you do?”
“He’s got the message. Staying put.” Tony let out a little puff.
“Where is he, anyway?” Nat looked at him, a little suspicious. “Calm down, Widow. I just wanna know how soon he can be here in the very unlikely case that we need him.”
Nat relaxed a little. “Guadalajara. He can be here within two hours or so, presuming he’s still got the Quinjet.”
Tony made a noise of approval.
One hour later, at about seven, tony ordered schwarma, and the five of them (he, Nat, Pepper, (who had come back down) Peter, and Rhodey) sat down for a bit, Peter editing his theory from earlier.
Two hours later, Peter somehow coaxed Nat into watching Frozen with him, and he got somehow more popcorn. Tony couldn’t seem to stop staring at the two of them. It was adorable. (He may or may not have taken a photo, and edited in a caption reading “Momma and Baby Spider)
Three hours later, Vision showed up, and after introductions to a starstruck Peter, (Who was officially cleared for staying over) he immediately set to work helping Tony with the upgrades to E.A.S.I.E.R.
Four hours later, Tony had taken over Peter’s place on the broacast-frequency search. The kid had done some excellent work. Said kid was now happily watching Lilo and Stitch with Nat.
Five hours later, Peter had fallen asleep on the couch, and Nat had covered him with a blanket before heading over to Tony, stealing a gulp of his fourth coffee, much to his displeasure. He was getting somewhere on the broadcast frequency, he knew he was.
Six hours later, Rhodey finally fell asleep as well, passed out on one of the desks. Tony covered him with another spare blanket (people tended to conk out in his lab a lot) and got back to his work.
Seven hours later, he finally got the frequency. Vision instantly got to work inputing it into E.A.S.I.E.R., and the two of them and Nat crowded around as the little lights started flickering, before turning green. Thank god, connection made. He typed out a quick little message, nothing much, just asking if everyone was ok, and pressed send. It was pretty rudimentary, so it was going to take an hour or so to get a response, but it was progress.
Eight hours later, the lights flashed red. Communications array fatally compromised. Tony groaned, long and loud, and Nat covered her tiny laugh with a cough as Vision lost the battle to restrain his smile.
Nine hours later, Vision had gone into sleep mode, and Tony was on coffee number five. He had patched into some sort of Xandarian sitcom, and he and Nat were watching it with great interest.
Ten hours later, Ul’d Kahn had just been revealed to actually be his twin brother Kal’h impersonating the real one, and Tire was apparently the illegitimate child of the Countess Pendra and her waqra keeper. Tony and Nat were very invested.
Eleven hours later, Tire had just killed their mother, who was actually U’ld and Kal’h’s sister and the assassin who murdered that contender for the Lyskian throne seven episodes back. Nat had gotten more popcorn, and a coffee that could’ve given Peter’s sugar count a run for its money.
Twelve hours later, Family of Betrayal’s season finale aired, and Tony and Nat had just started a caffeine and sleep-deprival fuelled theory cork-board focused on the possibility that said contender for the throne was actually the waqra keeper and as such, Tire’s father, making them the true heir and setting up the potential of their forced marriage to none other than the still-missing U’ld Kahn. They were discussing this when Peter woke up, and after they outlined the entire show to him, he had departed to make waffles, leaving them with the single command to ‘TAKE A NAP.’
Thirteen hours later, he and Nat were fast asleep in their chairs.
Fourteen hours later, they woke up to the smell of slightly burned smarties, and peter walked in with a tray of very colourful waffles and a giant smile. Rhodey had woken up while they were napping, and he was currently munching on a waffle with a surprisingly un-disgusted face. Vision was here too, eating as well, even though he didn’t need to.
The waffles were surprisingly good.
That was when E.A.S.I.E.R beeped once more. The five of them instantly crowded around one of the screens as Tony transferred the article.
Asgard Wiped off the Map
The prosperous planet destroyed in long-foretold Ragnarok
By Oa M’kirah
Xandar Free Press
2 minutes ago.
Asgard, best known as the seat of power for Odin the Allfather, has undergone a series of massive tragedies in recent days that have all been covered by the Xandar Free press, including the reveal that Loki was actually living as Odin since his ‘death,’ the reveal that Odin’s long-forgotten daughter Hela was in fact very much still alive, and the subsequent Coup d’etat successfully committed by the ‘Goddess of death’,. but nothing comes close to the absolute horror the planet underwent just in the last few hours, when the long-foretold death of the planet—known locally as ‘ragnarok’—finally came to pass.
Thor, the Prince of Asgard and heir to the throne, hasn’t been having much peace lately, weather it be the political game and attempted coup nearly committed by his brother, Loki, a few years back, Loki’s subsequent attempt to take the tesseract and conquer the planet ‘Earth’, or the Invasion of Dark Elves that killed queen Frigga, and caused Thor to believe Loki had died until the shocking reveal just two days ago. And most recently, his father, Odin, has died, leaving the ‘God of Thunder’ as the technical King of Asgard
Recently, after a trip to Earth with his brother, Thor vanished; leaving Asgard in the hands of his sister. That all changed when a Sakaarian ship entered Asgard’s atmosphere, carrying not only Thor, but a warrior of the valkyries, who were long-thought-extinct after the first Asgarian-Hela war. The two met up with bridge-keeper Heimdall, and began hatching a plan to evacuate all the remaining Asgardians civilians.
Hela, however, did not call herself the Goddess of Death for nothing. She had raised an undead army, aiming to secure control of the Bifrost and use it to ‘conquer all the realms.’ After their ship crashed, the valkyrie and Heimdall held off the undead soldiers while Thor headed to the palace to face Hela. at one point, a massive, green humanoid leapt into single combat with Hela’s giant wolf, Fenris.
Thor managed to make his way to the throne room, but the bifrost was destroyed as he was doing so, leaving the Asgardians stranded. Hela went to engage Thor, but it was at that moment that Loki himself made his glorious entrance, leading a massive Sakaarian ship filled with who appeared to be ex-gladiators. Loki immediately engaged the forces, whilst the civilians evacuated to the ship.
Back in the palace, Thor managed to best Hela, and immediately returned to the bridge, reuniting with Loki and turning the tide of the battle. Hela, however, was very much still standing, and launched a spike to prevent the ship from leaving. And yet, in a shocking twist, her executioner turned tables and freed the ship, sacrificing his life in the process.
With nothing they did slowing Hela’s advance, Thor sent Loki on a last ditch mission, finding the Crown of Surtur in the treasury, uniting it with the eternal flame, and destroying Asgard, with Hela falling along with it. Loki did so, summoning the fiery warlord, who instantly began destroying the planet, despite a small attempt from the green humanoid to stop him. Hela put up a valiant effort, but both of them fell as the planet was destroyed.
Now, the remaining asgardians; a people of millions reduced to a couple hundred thousand, are refugees under their brand new king. Drifting among the stars, headed to who knows where.
This is a devastating tragedy, and we must keep Asgard and its people in our hearts at this time. They need it, they truly do.
There was a moments silence as they finished reading, punctuated only by a muffled f-bomb from Rhodey, a sniffle from Peter, and a quiet “Shit.” From Natasha. Vision looked down, turning away from the screen.
“Friday,” was all Tony could say. “Prep the reserve Quinjet, the fancy one.”
“Right away boss.”
***
Tony would never, ever tell Nat this, but he was glad she had given Steve a heads up.
The Rogues got there in two hours, just as they said they would, and although it was painfully awkward for all of them, it didn’t phase Peter, who, by this point, well it was a miracle he hadn’t fainted from fanboying.
That didn’t stop him from being very, very annoyed that Tony wouldn’t let him come, and he had stomped off to his room in the compound, leaving behind a knowing Clint, bemused Sam and Wanda, and confused Steve.
They all piled into the upgraded quinjet, the one with spacefaring capabilities, and jetted off towards the signal for that other Sakaarian ship. That signal had thankfully been far easier to find.
And then, Tony had gotten up to go to the bathroom, leaving behind Wanda and Vision, who were whispering and giggling like a pair of newlyweds, and a cheerfully chatting Sam, Nat, Steve, and Rhodey, when he heard a noise coming from a supply closet, a small, musical noise.
He opened the door to find a fully-suited up Peter, playing Dragonvale on his phone.
After a brief argument, however, Peter headed to the main cabin with a cheeky smile on his face. It wasn’t like they had time to get back to earth and drop him off, but Tony was still keeping him in the ship.
They reached the ship in an hour, thanks to a couple warp points.
Unfortunately, they weren’t the only ones.
***
Perhaps the big purple guy hadn’t expected them to be there.
Perhaps he had.
Or perhaps he underestimated Loki.
Loki, who had found them early on. Loki, who had ran to distract Thanos and his forces while the Avengers got every Asgardian into the escape pods and out, leaving them in the capable care of Valkyrie and safe on their way to earth.
Loki, who had kept Thanos from seeing them as they ran to grab an unconscious Bruce.
Loki, who had looked absolutely terrified, especially as Thanos threatened his brother, who was chained to the floor, and missing an eye.
Loki, who had looked so desperately, tragically hopeful as they stepped in, much to the surprise of Thanos.
Loki, who, as Thanos was distracted by them had created an illusory duplicate, and dropped it right before he shot thanos through the heart with a bolt of green energy.
He had run straight to Thor after, and the two of them actually hugged.
It was clear Tony and the others had missed a lot.
After all the many hugs, and Bruce waking up and even more hugs following, and Peter fanboying some more (he was still very annoyed that he didn’t get to be in the thick of things) and asking Bruce seventeen different questions on his various papers (Bruce was absolutely gleeful to answer, looking towards Thor with a smirk at peter’s mention of “He has seven PHDs!”) Thor turned to them all, a question in his eyes as they filed onto the Quinjet.
“I must ask, how on earth did you find us?”
Tony tsk-ed, wagging his finger with a mischievous smirk in his eyes and on his mouth.
“Point Break, my good man—“ Thor huffed a little at the old nickname. “—Never underestimate the mighty power of a tweet.”
Edit, Aug 9th. HOLY FRICK OVER 1k HITS??? THANK YOU SO MUCH!!!