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“Jamie, do you really think this is a good idea?” Dani asked, her eyebrows furrowed slightly as the large piece (though it really looked more like a slab) of cheesecake was placed in front of Jamie.
Jamie nodded her head slowly. “Yep,” she said, her jaw set slightly. Dani knew that the more she warned Jamie, the more she would do the exact opposite of what she was being warned against.
She had no impulse control, Dani knew that, and most days, Dani loved that- but times like now, she couldn’t help but worry slightly about what the repercussions of Jamie’s actions would be. But Jamie was stubborn, and Dani had always known her to be stubborn, it was just one of the many things she loved about her. Her tenacity had been something that had drawn Dani in instantly, like a moth to a flame.
She loved how persistent and determined Jamie could be. But she had always said that one day, her stubbornness would be the thing that either 1) landed her in deep trouble or 2) was the reason she suffered from a terrible injury.
And today, it looked like Jamie’s stubbornness was going to sway more toward the latter.
She figured, she should’ve known something like this would happen, that she should’ve known as soon as Jamie read the words double chocolate cheesecake on the dessert menu that she would order it. Even if just to spite herself and her doctors. Ever since finding out that she was lactose intolerant (after years of complaining and stubbornly refusing to go to a doctor), Jamie had seemed to crave dairy more than ever before.
Though Dani knew this was more out of being told that she couldn’t have it.
Telling Jamie, she couldn’t do or have something was a sure-fire way of making sure that Jamie did exactly what she wasn’t supposed to.
“Jamie, really think about this,” Hannah said softly, “you had cheesy stuffed mushrooms for your starter, a carbonara for your main, and now this,” she shook her head, her eyes widening slightly, “don’t you think you’ve had enough dairy?”
Jamie sighed heavily and shook her head. “I’ve had enough of you three telling me what to do,” she replied, “I am a big girl and I’ll do what I want, okay?”
“Yeah, but there’s a limit Jamie, surely?” Owen asked, taking a sip of his wine, “weren’t you told to never do this?”
“She was,” Dani nodded her head slowly. “And I picked this place because they have dairy-free options,” she shrugged, “but if she wants to put herself through this… then she can suffer in silence,” she shook her head.
And even as she said this, they all knew damn well that Dani would do the exact opposite when Jamie was suffering later.
Jamie rolled her eyes and sighed heavily. “Look, all I’m gonna say is, I ate things like this for years before finding out I was lactose intolerant and nothing that bad happened,” she shrugged. “So can I please just eat in peace?”
Nothing that bad happened. Famous last words, Dani thought, already as they sat in silence on the taxi ride home, she could see Jamie shifting slightly, her face twisting, as her stomach began to gurgle softly. “Are you okay?” She asked, turning her head to face Jamie, who was sat with her eyes closed, her hand placed over her stomach as she breathed in through her nose and out through her mouth. Something Dani had seen her do many times whenever she had cramps or any other pain- or when she felt nauseous.
Dani didn’t miss the way the taxi driver’s eyes would dart up to the rear-view mirror watching them every so often, his brow furrowed deeply, his eyes narrowed as if trying to read the situation. “Yeah, I’m fine,” Jamie lied speaking quickly and bluntly, as if not trusting herself to not vomit everywhere if she kept her mouth open for too long. She quickly went back to her steady breathing, her cheeks puffing out slightly with each, slow exhale.
“Are you sure?” She asked softly, watching Jamie with curious eyes.
“I said I was fine.”
Dani rolled her eyes and sighed softly. “You don’t have to lie to me… if you don’t feel okay, you can tell me. I’d prefer if you told me.”
“Is she gonna be sick?” The taxi driver asked, his thick cockney accent cutting through the seeming calmness of the taxi. He pulled off to the side of the road and leaned around his seat his eyes locking on Jamie. “If she is, you can get out now. I’m not cleaning up after you," his tone was harsh and scathing, his eyes burning into them.
“Baby, are you gonna be sick?” Dani asked, reaching her hand out, placing it on Jamie’s thigh, causing the dark-haired woman to look at her that tell-tale pained expression written all over her face.
“I’ll be alright,” she said shaking her head slowly, placing her other hand over Dani’s and squeezing it gently, as if reassuring the blonde. “Don’t worry about me mate,” she said to the driver this time, “just keep going I’ll be fine.”
He looked between the two women, and then down their joined hands before sighing softly and grumbling something unintelligible to himself, as he set off driving down the road once more. Jamie gave Dani a tight-lipped smile before closing her eyes again and resting her head back on her seat, resuming her steady rhythmic breathing. Dani ran her thumb over Jamie’s knuckles before bringing her hand up to her lips and kissing the back of it gently.
“I love you,” Dani said softly, only just audible over the low volume of the radio, and the crackle of the taxi intercom.
“I love you too,” Jamie mumbled. Her words coming out sullen, and as Dani looked to her, she could see a soft pout forming on Jamie’s face. And already she knew she was in for a long night.
When they got home, the first thing Jamie did was run up the stairs, slamming their bedroom door shut behind her, she could hear her moving around in their room, and she knew Jamie would be changing out of her tight jeans and into something that would be looser and softer on her now bloated stomach. She shook her head slowly, as she made her way up the stairs behind Jamie.
She figured one day they would both learn.
That she would learn to stop warning Jamie against things, and that Jamie would learn to stop being so stubborn.
Dani watched as Jamie seemed to become more and more uncomfortable and irritable with each passing minute. Her groans becoming louder and more frequent, and her expression twisting more and more as she moved around the house slowly clutching onto her stomach looking for anything she could to make herself feel better. While Dani tried to figure out anything she could do to help make Jamie feel better, bringing her warm drinks, and aspirins to help ease the pain.
She knew it had to be bad for Jamie to be complaining the way she was.
As well as being stubborn, Jamie was strong and seemed to take everything in her stride, never complaining whenever she was ill (but complaining about a lot of other things). Dani hated that there wasn’t really anything she could do to help. She hated having to sit idly by and watch Jamie suffer like this- knowing this situation was easily avoidable had Jamie just listened to what her doctors, friends, and Dani had suggested. But if she did that, she wouldn’t be Jamie.
“How are you holding up?” Dani asked softly, leaning on the doorway, and watching as Jamie lay on the couch, her eyes shut tight, her brow furrowed deeply.
“Not too good,” she replied shaking her head slowly.
“Do you need me to get you anything?”
She nodded her head, taking a deep breath, just as she had in the taxi. “Yeah… could you get me a bucket or a bin or anything… just in case I… y’know?” Jamie asked, avoiding saying the words.
“Yeah, of course, I can,” Dani replied, “do you need me to get you anything else too?”
“Uh, just the bucket thanks,” she said, her voice strained as she tried to keep her sentences short. “And maybe some cuddles?” She asked. “Your cuddles always make me feel better,” she added a small, tight-lipped smile crossing her lips as she turned her head and opened her eyes slowly looking at Dani.
“Yeah, I can do that too,” she said smiling softly.
They’d been together for five years- the happiest five years of Dani’s life if she was being completely honest with herself, and in those five years she had seen Jamie do a lot of stupid things (she’d also done a lot of stupid things with her), but she had never once seen her suffer the consequences quite like this. Of course, she had never once overdone it the way she had at dinner that night.
And as much as this was self-inflicted, and as much as Dani had told Jamie this exact thing would happen, her heart ached for the other woman- seeing Jamie in pain or being upset in any way always hurt Dani more than she could put into words. And right now, was no different, she was determined to do whatever it took to make Jamie feel better. Even if she couldn’t help but feel entirely helpless as she watched Jamie sit on their couch doubled over in pain, her arms wrapped around her stomach as she groaned softly. A bucket situation on the floor between her feet just in case.
“Baby, are you sure you’re gonna be okay?” Dani asked, rubbing her hand up and down Jamie’s back- in what she hoped was a soothing manner. When all she received for a reply was a soft whine, she shuffled even closer to Jamie, wrapping her arm around her, pulling her closer. She couldn’t help but smile softly when Jamie lifted her head, resting it on Dani’s shoulder, and nuzzling into her slightly. “Do you need me to get you anything, or do anything that might make you feel better?”
Jamie shook her head slowly. “Just keep doing this?” She asked softly, turning her head, and pressing a light kiss to Dani’s shoulder, before quickly turning her head away again.
Dani smiled softly and nodded her head. “Okay…” she replied, resting her head on Jamie’s, and tightening her hold on her just slightly. “I can do that for you,” she said, “but if you think of anything else just let me know?”
“I will.”
Jamie was a surprisingly cooperative patient that night, more so than Dani had ever known her to be before. All her stubbornness was seemingly thwarted, replaced instead by slight neediness and clinginess. A want to be near Dani and to have Dani just hold her- something Dani was more than happy to do. There they lay on their couch, with a thin blanket over them, and the bucket on the floor just in front of Jamie as Dani laid behind Jamie, cuddled close to her, pressing a heat bag to her stomach in hopes of easing some of the cramps Jamie was currently suffering from.
“How’re you feeling now after… y’know?”
“A little better, I guess,” Jamie mumbled, and Dani knew that she was still slightly embarrassed over the fact that Dani had seen her vomit (excessively) not one hour earlier. “Still not happy you had to see that.”
Dani pressed a soft kiss to Jamie’s shoulder, hugging her a little closer. “You really need to stop worrying about that.”
“But I do worry about it,” Jamie replied, “I mean, it’s not exactly the most attractive thing in the world, is it?”
Dani rolled her eyes and sighed softly. “Jamie, there is nothing you could do that would make me less attracted to you.”
“Even when I do dumb shit like this?”
“Yes,” Dani chuckled, nodding her head, despite the fact that she knew Jamie couldn’t see her, “even when you do dumb shit like this, I still think you are the most gorgeous woman I have ever seen, and I still love you with my whole heart.”
“I love you too,” Jamie replied, her voice barely above a whisper as she brought Dani’s hand up to her mouth and pressed gentle kisses to her fingertips, making Dani’s heart swell slightly. Jamie brought Dani’s hand around to her cheek and nuzzled into her, she could feel the warmth radiating from Jamie. “Your hands are cold,” she mumbled, it feels nice.” She turning her head slightly to place a lazy kiss on Dani’s palm.
It never failed to amaze Dani how the small things that Jamie did still made her feel warm and fuzzy inside, even after all these years. She wondered if there would ever come a time that they didn’t.
Later, as they lay in bed (Dani laid on her side watching Jamie carefully as Jamie laid on her back her eyes closed), she had noticed a slight improvement in Jamie’s demeanour. While she still clutched her stomach tightly, her face was no longer twisted in pain. As if sensing being watched, she opened her eyes slowly and turned her head to face Dani, their eyes locking. It didn’t matter how many times Dani had been in this position with Jamie, looking into the other woman’s eyes always left Dani feeling breathless and had her heart racing.
“You can say it,” Jamie said, her tone slightly huffy, “if you want to, you can say it.”
“Say what?” Dani asked, softly, though she already knew exactly what Jamie meant.
The other woman sighed softly and shifted rolling over until she was facing Dani, wincing slightly in discomfort. “You can say you told me so… like if you really want to… you can say it… it’s true.”
Dani shook her head slowly, a soft smile tugging at her lips, she brushed some of the wayward curls from Jamie’s face and leaned forwards, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead. “I’m never gonna say I told you so.”
“No?”
Dani rolled her eyes playfully. “Well maybe not never,” she said her tone light and teasing, “but I can wait until you’re feeling a little better… saying it to you now just seems really cruel.” She watched as a small smile spread across Jamie’s lips, as she shook her head slowly. “There’s that gorgeous smile…” she said a smile of her own spreading across her face as she shuffled closer to Jamie. “Are you feeling any better?”
“Yeah, a little,” Jamie nodded, “still feel really uncomfortable, but I do feel better after… the incident.”
Dani draped her arm over Jamie’s waist and slipped her hand under Jamie’s shirt. She ran her fingers up and down her spine lightly, still feeling the warmth coming from Jamie’s skin, a stark contrast to how cold Jamie usually felt. “Good… I’m glad you’re feeling better,” she replied, “do you need me to get you anything?” She asked softly, her eyes scanning Jamie’s face, smiling softly as she watched Jamie’s eyes flutter closed.
“No… just keep doing this,” a content sigh slipped past Jamie’s lips as she moved her own arm from around her stomach to wrap it around Dani pulling her even closer.
Dani’s smile grew as Jamie seemed to pull her impossibly close. “Okay,” she said. “But just know if there is anything I can do for you, tell me and I’ll do it.”
“I know you will,” Jamie nodded, “thank you for everything tonight. I really appreciate it.”
“You’re welcome,” Dani replied, as she continued to run her fingers up and down Jamie’s spine.
The air around them fell silent, and for a while, Dani thought Jamie had fallen to sleep, and so, she lie there, listening to Jamie’s even breathing. As she closed her eyes, willing herself to fall asleep, a soft mumble caught her off guard, bringing a small smile to her face. “I really love you,” Jamie said, her voice tired.
“I really love you too,” Dani replied, cuddling the dark-haired woman a little tighter, enjoying the warmth of Jamie’s body against her own as she readied herself for a night of taking care of Jamie whatever it took.
