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Chapter Text

Perhaps it had always meant to turn out this way.

Or Zuko thinks so to console himself from what has come to his life. He is to be offered as a figurative sacrificial lamb. Zuko has no option to say no as a prince of no honor and only in name.

A pull from his hair snaps him from his angst thought. He looks across the mirror and the elderly woman doing his hair is giving him an apologetic smile. It’s been a while since he had his hair up in a top-knot as royalty should’ve. As a prisoner, he had no right to touch his hair, and it is now had grown until the middle of his back.

He had never stepped out of this house after losing an Agni Kai with his father. Calling it a house is rather a gross overstatement. It’s a house for one. Elegant as to hold up an image, but small, like a cell. The garden at the back is small and walled up, the top half completely shut with bars. It is a person-sized birdcage, and Zuko had never looked up without grid patterns from the bars shadowing him. There are bars on the windows and guards on the doors too. He was not to leave at all, not even allowed any visitors. He heard his uncle had tried, but Zuko never see him succeed.

The only one allowed to see him and who has become his only friend is a kind elderly maid who is now doing his hair and helping him dressed in royal robes. She was also the one sneaking letters from his uncle, the only way he communicated with his uncle at all in the three-year imprisonment.

His uncle had tried to console him with pretty shallow lies ever since his father’s decision to take Zuko out of imprisonment to be used and Zuko can only endure so much with polite nods. Insufferable as he is, Zuko appreciates that his uncle is accompanying him to the north pole, but as a de facto, he’s here as the executioner for Zuko’s fate.

Though he’s off to the mouth of a beast, Zuko can’t help but appreciate the scenery outside his cell.

It’s been three years of containment, and stepping out, Zuko takes in everything.

Things have changed. The gardens lusher, the walls repainted, and the docks busier. It feels like life had moved on without him. What hurts the most is seeing Azula from afar. Surprised that she’s there at all, maybe sending him off. His father doesn’t even grace him with his face for the last time Zuko will ever walk in the Fire Nation land. Azula is older, taller, and her features look more mature, more feminine just like her mother, and a stoic calmness of her father.

Zuko stares at her because she’s not moving closer. He knows Azula doesn’t care much about him, just the throne and being powerful. What confuses him is that she’s there at all. Zuko wanted to go over there, perhaps a hello, perhaps a goodbye. But the guards on his back are tasked so he’ll go straight to the battleship. Why does a battleship sail him towards an arranged marriage? They said it was the only kind of ship they had. After all, the fire nation so-called ‘peace effort’ had only started since last year, or so Zuko was told.

So, Zuko looked longingly, tried a wave and a smile. Azula’s face remains blank as if she’s not looking at him at all.

That’s alright too. She’ll only be another one that left him among many. It still hurts losing her, despite their estranged relationship, Zuko had thought they would have the rest of their adulthood to fix it. Not anymore, not when he’s being shipped to the Northern Water Tribe as a political pawn.

“Perhaps the next visit she’ll warm up to you, dear nephew,” his uncle pipes from his shoulder, surprising no one that he always had the right thing to say. Though his words have always been too hopeful to mend, yet enough to tear at times.

The only one that had said goodbye is the elderly maid. She stood by the dock end of a ramp with a basket of goods. Her back hunched and a white streak split her right side of the head, up in a tight bun. Her eyes downturned by heavy lids always looks kindly and a frown that always seems worried.

“How will you adapt there? Will they accommodate your fire nation taste buds? I hear their cuisine is very different. Do you have enough clothing for cold weather? Where will you live there? How long is the trip? Have you ever ridden a ship? Do you have remedies for seasickness just in case?”

For an old lady, she sure talks fast. Zuko can barely catch what she says, but he smiles at her worry. Hers is the second one to his uncle.

“I’ll be okay, auntie Iza.”

“Write, will you?”

“I’ll see what I can do,” Zuko says, not willing to lie to her. The least he can do for her is the truth in the royal house of lies.

Zuko waves at her as the platform retracted, when he sees further up the dock, Azula is no longer there.

From then on, there’s only the sea.

++++

Peculiarly, when there’s nothing but water and tides, it feels like he finally breathed fresh air.

Zuko had only seen the sea in a form of a beach. That joyful day on Ember Island. Way back when he was innocent, when mom was still there, when father still loves him, when Azula hadn’t seen him as a competitor. The beach was beautiful and the water warm. It was the happiest memory he had. Not because of the beach, but because of his family.

Zuko is letting go of his family, but the waves of the sea mysteriously evoke the same feeling of home. Perhaps he finally believed his uncle’s words of hope. Zuko had no place in his family anymore. Now that he’s away from home, in the middle of the sea, no one is hanging shame above his head. In the north pole, perhaps it could be a fresh start.

He’s standing at the bow of the iron battleship. The sharp tip sliced the tides, and the water breaks in seafoam, dancing as it does. Something so calm and blue had never looked so beautiful breaking apart. But can the sea even break? It’s so whole in its entirety. Mysterious and deep, holding a power that he can never imagine as if it’s an entirely another being.

Zuko finds himself entranced by the way the water moves at sea. How the waves can sometimes be meek ripples like a step would do to a pond, and how in the storm the waves are so big and wild that they could’ve tipped the boat ever. But it never came to that way, even as the ship was two meters above sea level.

Zuko closes his eyes, feels the dampness in his fingers and the strong wind that passes his hair. At night as dark as this, all he can see of the sea are at the mercy of the moon and the stars.

As he opens his eyes, he’s greeted by the moon. Full and bright. The sea’s lively waves break its image, but its light makes the water enchanting instead. Zuko looks down, and he could’ve sworn he has seen himself in the breaking waves.

“Nephew,” calls the gentle voice of his uncle, but it startles him all the same.

Zuko twists so fast his hair a wild mess all over his face. “Uncle, you surprise me.”

“Apologies, Prince Zuko, you seem distracted. Why are you awake so late at night?”

“I couldn’t sleep.”

“Are you nervous about the match?”

Zuko nods to lie instead of trusting his words. He couldn’t say that the waves wake him, and seeing the dynamic water calmed him. He couldn’t say that the sea had called him as if it wants to see him. Perhaps it was just Zuko desperately trying to find comfort.

He never wanted all this to happen, he never wished for his life to be this way. All he wanted was to save his people. If speaking up about a blatant massacre of child soldiers is so wrong then this must be how everything is meant to be.

If this is the price to stand up to what’s right, then maybe Zuko always meant to be punished.

It hurts to come to terms with his fate, but he had three years of solitude with letters from his uncle, and auntie Iza that has infinite patience with him. Those are the only mercies life given him in that solitude. It hasn’t always been easy to do so.

His first year of isolation is filled with anger, self-blame, and frustration. Things thrown to walls, he had said nasty things towards auntie Iza and even in letters towards his uncle, both he regretted till this day. Year two is even harder, that’s when he was depressed and the evil words are directed towards himself. He wouldn’t have lived to year three without auntie Iza holding him as he cried, telling him that someone’s life doesn’t have to be measured with worth and failures. Life is precious whatever form they have and whichever trail they walk on. And so, year three is filled with efforts of acceptance. Efforts that he still sometimes lacks.

“Would you accompany me to tea?” his uncle’s offer shakes him from his musing. “I have an excellent quality of chamomile blend at hand, perhaps it’ll help you sleep.”

Zuko finds himself slumping even more at the narrow space of the bow, looking longingly at sea. “I don’t think it’ll help. I think I could stay up until sunrise.”

“That would not be good for you Prince Zuko. The sun will keep you awake, and it will leave you too tired for your morning meditation.”

Zuko tighten his grip on his elbows, “I don’t understand why you kept insisting on that. I’m not a firebender anymore.” It doesn’t get easier to say, not out loud, not on paper.

His uncle had found out he lost his bending the second Zuko is thrown on house arrest. He had insisted since that same day to continue his breathing exercise, and practice fire katas. Fire comes from the breath, strong confident forms, and passion. Zuko knows this even though he was never a good firebender to begin with, but no fire ever sparked from his hands ever since his father burned half his face in that stage of Agni Kai.

He used to be Prince Zuko, heir of the throne. Ever since that day, he is Prince Zuko the condemned. The flame of Fire Nation royal blood is supposedly sacred because they’re blood relatives of the first firebenders gifted from Agni himself. Zuko losing his bending after he lost to an Agni Kai with his royal father had been seen as Agni condemning him as weak and unworthy.

A worthless prince.

Zuko had accepted the pain, but the bleeding never stopped.

“You may not be able to create fire, but not even that can strip away the firebender in you,” Uncle Iroh’s tone is firmer. Gone that pitying expression, replaced by hard affirmation. “Do not reject yourself this identity. You are the Prince of Fire Nation, your fire is blessed by Agni himself-”

“Agni has left me,” Zuko snaps, twisting away from the bow. He ducks his head in shame for raising his voice, but he can’t hold back the bitterness in his voice. “Agni had taken back his gift because I dishonor him, because I didn’t fight.”

“Prince Zuko-”

“I never regretted voicing what I think is right, but I should’ve fought my father.” Zuko looks down at the breaking waves, “I had angered Agni. He gave me a gift, an oath, and I didn’t use it in his honor.”

Tears had long dried from his eyes, but in absence of his tears, the dull ache in his heart twists deeper. Soft steps approach.

“The Spirits works in mysterious ways, but they’re never maliciously intended,” A gentle hand landed between his shoulder blades. Zuko shivers at the touch, too foreign of a concept caused by long-term lack of physical contact. “You may not able to form fire, but fire still bends to your will. At the end of this journey you’re facing, you’ll learn that sometimes the most beautiful of lessons are always earned with the greatest pain.”

Zuko wanted to listen, but he’s distracted by the water hitting the hull, the soaring rolls of waves.

Uncle Iroh assumed his journey had just begun, but Zuko feels that his journey is coming to an end. He says nothing though, knowing that his uncle won’t stop trying, and his desperate tries are hard to watch at times.

So, he lets himself be pulled from the point spot of the bow towards the kitchen to drink tea. Zuko breathes, and in benign curiosity, he controls the small fire from the wick heating the teapot. The fire grows and dims with his breath, but that’s all that he has left of this so-called gift, manipulate fire that’s already existed.

Thirty minutes later, slumber comes easier for Zuko.

Like a promise kept, the sunrise wakes him.

+++++

Nothing matters as soon as he laid eyes on her.

Standing on the steps of the entrance, she casts her eyes down upon him like the moon shining at the sea. Her hair is white as the snow around her, cascading down like fine silk, bellowed gently by the sea breeze, framing her ethereal face. Yet what strikes Zuko the most is her eyes, striking ocean blue, widen with an enthralled shock mirroring his.

Zuko had dreaded this meeting ever since the letter came from a cold armored soldier that he’s to be betrothed to someone he barely knows from across the sea. He had it in a good heart that his betrothed -which he had heard that she’s as young as he is- must’ve been at least slightly opposed to marrying a prince of a suspiciously repenting nation. After all, the Fire Nation hasn’t officially seized peace, only dormant, and had been making efforts to strengthen relationships with other countries. It was a game of complicated political chess that Zuko knew from a peephole of his containment through uncle’s letters.

No one likes when their life is toyed with, but Zuko was promised his honor will be restored if the marriage pulls through. That, and he has no choice as a prince stripped of his power.

Yet none of that matters anymore. Not the glares sent his way, not the worried ones sent to hers. Only the two of them, held in a time stop and a cooling chill raising on his spine.

A word whispered in Zuko’s mind, not knowing where it’s from. I’ve lived all my life to finally meet you again, and so the burdens of my pain, the scars of my life, the haunting mistakes, all wash away as we met. Perhaps he had read it in a poem, a magnificent poem made by a stranger yet so fitting to the most personal moment of his life.

What little fear Zuko had, washes away when she smiles at him. Not the polite practiced smile reserved for formal meetings, but a real one. Her plush pink lips stretch into a smile so wide it reaches her eyes that shine in retrospect. Zuko thought she couldn’t be more beautiful, but she just did as if it was nothing.

“Prince Zuko,” she approached, her voice as melodious as a flute.

It makes his throat dry, but Zuko tries, “Princess Yue. I’m very happy to meet you.” He’s not surprised that he means it, he’s surprised that he voiced it. He’s taught better than to run off his mouth on anything less than proper.

But his angel smiles pleasantly, “The joy is all mine…” Then, with a flick of knowing eyes, she adds, “I’ve been waiting for you.”

Zuko extends his hand to her, and her hands are lithe and cold in his. She smiles, a gentle beaming thing, and Zuko has a feeling that he’ll always look up at her.

“So have I.”

+++++

They gladly let the ‘adults’ handle the talks of their marriage while they spend the rest of their time attached on the hip.

They never got any privacy though, since Yue isn’t trusted with the prince alone so two armored senior waterbenders guard them at all times.

Zuko doesn’t find it too troublesome, as he had predicted, nothing really matters once she’s with him. Nothing at all, even though the crowds and the adults do makes him nervous from the years-long isolation. He sticks with Yue all the time, and not even himself matters. It feels almost terrifying how easily he sheds the skin of his past and just be Zuko for her.

“I’m just Yue for you too,” she says shyly as Zuko confessed.

“That’s true.” Because her being a princess never really come up to him. As soon as they talked, it feels like they’d been best friends for ages.

It’s easy to talk to her about everything. Zuko can go on and on about his secret love for the arts, about theater and poems and songs, never to be met by scornful comments about how a prince shouldn’t have interests in anything other than combat and strategy. She then shares her woes with him too, about how she wished she’s a waterbender and be useful to her tribe instead of just being a figurehead. She has a lot of ideas for a better tribe and better social lives for her people, but only to be met by scoffs and degrading smiles.

“You have a chance to be a leader, Yue,” Zuko consoled at one point. “We’re settling here if we wed, I doubt they’ll give me any power to rule then.”

She only replies with grim eyes towards her guard, “Stay here.”

“But Princess!” one of the guards stutters, “we have orders.”

“If I am your Princess then heed my order. I need to have a private conversation with Prince Zuko.” She walks, but then the guards still follow her. She sighs exasperatedly, “We’ll be within your sight.”

With that compromise, they walked along the beach, the guards tailing a few meters behind.

“‘If’, you said. Do you think there’s a possibility that they won’t marry us?” Yue says with a stiff tone, eyes forward and firm.

Zuko’s underlying dread finally bubbled to the surface, no longer tempted down with the joy of Yue. But he knows, this is a princess asking a prince of a political move, while also being each other’s friend despite their opposite side.

“I think it’s strange that this arrangement happens at all.” Zuko finally says the words that have been nagging at the depths of his mind. “The Nothern Water Tribe are an isolationist country, and the Fire Nation is a lurking dragon. The war hasn’t officially ended, there was no declaration of peace as far as I’ve heard. There are still factories producing tanks and weapons, even though it’s under a claim of self-defense. No invasion was done in the past year, but they haven't returned the war prisoners as well. I’m afraid that I’m lost to what the Fire Lord could possibly want with this union.”

The information is only days old for Zuko as well. As soon as he stepped outside of his containment, the first thing he asked his uncle is ‘Is the war over?’ and how shocked he was to be told ‘technically no’. Zuko tried to pry all the possible information from his uncle, but even General Iroh is not having a full picture of things as of yet. However, General Iroh isn’t trusting his little brother at this peace effort as well but is enthusiastic to see it pull through. Another foolish hope, but Zuko wishes instead that his uncle is smarter than that and only foolishly optimistic for Zuko’s sake.

“That then begs the question,” Zuko continues, “What could an isolationist country that’s been functioning well independently want anything to do with a nation skirting at war?”

“As far as I know? Nothing,” Yue looks at the tides with a calculative gaze. “We have everything we need to survive generations with occasional trade with the Earth Kingdom. We have a firmly established government, and we won't need anything for defense. Despite their best efforts, Fire Nation had never conquered us. It’ll be unlikely to ask for any military defense from our only foe. So, no, we didn’t need anything from the Fire Nation.”

A tense silence that follows resonates the same question in their head, ‘Then what is this arrangement for?’

It would’ve been romantic if not for the tense political climate. Both of them gained an ounce of healthy paranoia towards the adults that gave them away, that maybe they’re being pushed together to explode instead of creating peace.

“No matter what the reason,” Yue continues, stepping in front of him, hands clasps on his. Lithe, soft, and soothingly cold. “I’m happy that we’ve met.”

Zuko smiles, sharing the sentiment.

Yue hums, eyes glinting as she watches him, “You don’t smile a lot.”

Zuko flushes under her revealing gaze, “Is it weird? I know some people say that I look dishonest.”

“No, you look beautiful.”

At first, he flustered at the compliment, then highly conscious of his scar that he turns to hide it from her sight.

“No, don’t,” She cradles his face with those gentle cold hands, turning him to face her. Careful thumbs caress the edge of his horrid scar. He was burned to the bone, and the marred skin sticking close to his cheekbone. His eye on that side is mostly functional, just a bit blurry, and the golden color slightly cloudier. Even with such disfiguring scar, she looks at him like she meant it when she said he’s beautiful. “If I ask, will you tell me what happened?”

Zuko clasps her hands with his, “There’s little in the world I won’t do for you.”

So, Zuko talked and talked about everything that he is. Zuko had never been anyone else but himself, yet speaking about what he’d been through feels so foreign. Like it never really sticks to him just how much had happened in all 16 years of his life until he finally utters it with his mouth. Like the weight is finally acknowledged, and it’s heavier than predicted. That’s why he cried as he tells Yue how it all started when his father wants to step over his uncle to be the heir to the throne, then his grandfather told him that the condition was to murder Zuko. He told her that his mother left to save him. He told her that day when he slipped into the war council to find an atrocious plan, standing up to it and disgracing Agni.

He tells her how he’s condemned. How he was a firebender but not anymore after that failed Agni Kai and his father’s blessed fire burned him. He tells her his deepest pain, how even the Spirits had abandoned him.

“I don’t think spirits ever abandoned us, not when they seem to always reach out to us,” Yue said to this.

“A punishment, then.”

“I wonder… it doesn’t feel quite right either.”

“What makes you say that?”

“You feel warm,” Yue says, tightening her hands over his, “You always feel warm, even when we’ve been outside for hours.”

That’s true, in fact, Zuko never felt cold, but that could just be his cold-weather clothes that’s been gracefully given by Chief Arnook. It’s thicker than the rest of the locals to accommodate his adaptation to the shocking change in weather.

“I think the Spirits work in mysterious ways, but they never abandon. Have I told you how my hair turned white?”

Zuko blinks, “You’re not born with it?”

She chuckles gently, “No.”

She tells him about how Tui blessed her with a part of her soul when Yue was born not breathing. How her hand feels cold to the touch but she too doesn’t feel cold. She was kept, still does, like a caged bird ever since her mother who was a healer waterbender was a casualty in a Fire Nation attack. How her father is so blinded with fear of losing Yue that he belittles her sometimes. Zuko never really talked about his mother, not when he’s not sure himself whether she lives or dies, but all the heavy words flow like petals atop running rivers.

They returned hand in hand and dry throats from talking on length. Both have a matching fond smile of each other. Yet it seems, that no one is happy with their union. Not Chief Arnook, not the tribe, nor even Uncle Iroh.

+++++

Just as Zuko starts to feel comfortable with a routine in this foreign land, the calm is broken again. Fire Lord Ozai had sent a message to call back General Iroh in an urgent matter of national security. Zuko can read between the line just as fine, and when Uncle Iroh looks at him with unadulterated fear, it doesn’t surprise him.

Fire Lord Ozai, father of Prince Zuko, is leaving his son in a foreign land at the hands of people he hadn’t formally established as allies yet during a sensitive political climate. Iroh pleaded to Chief Arnook to bring Zuko along with him and return another day to continue the marriage talks only to be denied right away.

“We are promised a Prince, and the letter doesn’t state that he requires the prince as well,” Chief Arnook coldly states, looking under his nose over his uncle and him. It’s a throne of ice instead of fire, but the demeaning stare is all the same. How could this man ever create a girl as sweet as Yue? Men like that created abominations like Zuko, and ruthless fighters like Azula. “We will house him as you tend to your matters.” Zuko hears the faux hospitality dripping from the man. “This will give our children time to get to know one another even more, is it not? It will do wonders for the harmony of our two nations.”

“Wonderful as that is, I’m afraid of our Prince’s safety. Not all nations share your kind sentiments towards the Fire Nation’s peaceful reproach. I’m afraid that we’ll leave your wonderful tribe vulnerable if news spread that Prince Zuko resides here.”

Uncle Iroh had been the Fire Nation’s spoke person for the last year ever since the sudden turn towards peace talks and befriending manner. He’s good for the job as he sounds convincing, honest. Zuko wonders if his uncle really believes that his father had changed, that the man who’s ready to kill his son to curb him for the throne had a turnover. He had heard that the world is hard to win over, but is only starting to lean in.

“Are you implying that we’re weak?” The chief glowers.

“If the days we’ve spent in the Nothern Water Tribe tells us anything, is that your tribe is anything but weak. I simply don’t want our relationship to strain if there’s any chance that you fall in a crossfire in malice intention towards the Fire Nation. We’ve finally seen eye to eye.”

“We’ve opened our borders to you, with quite a deal as well.” The Chief narrows his eyes, clearly not sharing Uncle’s sentiment. Both elders share a look, passing things that no one can decipher. Zuko looks at Yue that sits beside her father, looking just as confused about what this deal is supposed to be. “I’m offering you in good heart to house the prince. I assure you he’ll be under our tribe’s utmost protection. You are our ally, as we are yours. Of course, we will ally you in your road to path a way to peace, whatever the blunders that come.”

Zuko stiffens, he dares not even slightest twitch.

“I’m glad to hear that you’ve put your trust in us,” Uncle bows, “It’s reassuring to leave the prince to you.”

Zuko doesn’t breathe, doesn’t move, doesn’t feel.

He’s numb to the bone, even as uncle hugs him close as soon as they’re alone in their quarters, yet it still squeezes a lone tear from his unscarred eyes. Truthfully, Zuko isn’t afraid that he’s being left behind. What awaits cannot be worse than what he had to endure so far.

Golden eyes watch as one of only two pillars in his life left to the black winter sea. A cold hand clasps his. Before his foundation fell, she steps in to stand in his uncle’s place. It feels more than that though, but then how else could he explain the sudden bravery in his soul?

Yue reminded him of auntie Iza in the way she always shows him kindness, it reminded him of his guilt for not being able to send auntie Iza letters. Hopefully, the letter he leaves with his uncle finds her safely. The letter had sounded like a goodbye, like a final thing. He doesn’t realize it until he reread it. His uncle would be back, and if the marriage come through, they planned to marry at Fire nation too. How could he have forgotten that?

“Have you ever thought of the future?” Zuko asks.

Yue watches him, then towards the sea, “Constantly, don’t you?”

Zuko looks longingly as the sea is swallowing the battleship beneath its horizon.

“I never thought I could afford to.” Zuko holds her hand tighter when fear made itself known, and Zuko always combats it with the same thing, defeated acceptance. “Ever since that day I lost my bending, it felt like… my life isn’t mine anymore.” Zuko never voiced it, but the moment it does, it felt true.

“Oh, you meant your future.” Yue’s eyes mellow to sadness. “I understand.”

Zuko believes her. If there’s anyone who would understand him, it’s her.

“We may not have a say in our future, but you know what I did instead?” Yue turns to him, both hands holding both of his. Blue eyes big and earnest, she looked at him so kindly. “I think of how different the world would be, far in the future.”

Zuko blinks, “I never thought of that.”

Yue’s face brightens, “Imagine, one day, all three-nation coming together and being peaceful to one another. With the war coming to an end, peace is near. I would wonder when we get married, we will be able to go on diplomatic travels and see the world, or even taste those fire flakes you talked about. There would be female chiefs, perhaps a nation with all three benders, international travels!”

Both of them know that the status of the war is still far too vague to know clearly, and what Yue does is not that she dared to dream. It’s to fantasize in a way to cope.

“Yue… that’s…” Cruel. Zuko wants to say, but he halted. The dull ache in his chest twisted, a treacherous voice whispered, there’s nothing else here but to dream vacantly. Has his life really come to this? So unsalvageable that all he can do is dream a meaningless dream.

“I’m sorry,” Yue says, seeing how his expression fell.

“No, I-I just…” Zuko’s eyes teared up, his hands shaking so violently he lets her go, afraid of crushing her. Zuko paces, his breathing getting quicker. No longer fogged with her love, nor his uncle to soothe the loneliness, what’s beneath revealed his anger that he thought he had outgrown. “It’s not fair,” he mumbles between harsh breaths.

“What?”

“It’s not fair!” he screamed, even the crashing waves upon the dock shores can’t dampen his voice. “It’s not fair, Yue. We deserve a life, don’t we? You deserve a fair chance as a leader! You deserve to marry someone you love rather than being a political move!”

“I love you enough, Zuko!” Yue cries, a pool of tears in her blue eyes. “You’re enough! What we have is enough.”

“Is it?!” his screams come out as rasps, warm tears fall down his face. “You deserve a life, to be seen as equal! To be a leader I know you’ll thrive as. And I… Spirits, I just want to know whether or not my mom is alive. I want to talk to Azula again. I want to firebend again! Do I deserve this? Do I deserve to be your chain? To be locked up so many years only to- to- to be a tool! Does he even still consider me his son? A person? All because I did one thing at thirteen, I’m paying it with my whole life! Is it really so treacherous to share my mind?”

“None of us deserved the position we’re in,” Yue says patiently, eyes still wet. Her hands spread towards her back awkwardly. “None of us. I wished you had a better life before you got here.”

His legs gave up, the soft snow cushion his drop, spots melted where his tears fall.

He wishes he does, but a pang of guilt in his heart keeps telling him that it’s not that bad. He’s not starved, not kicked out, not tortured. At the thought that things could’ve been worst, he never entertained an idea that he should’ve been treated better.

“You deserved better the most,” Zuko looks up to her like they did the first time, and even now in her sadness, she’s beautiful. “You’re so good, Yue. The world could give their everything to you and it still won’t be enough.”

“That would make me greedy, won’t it?” She tried to jest, but her chuckle is wet.

Zuko shakes his head, chuckling too. Zuko looks up to her bending down, hugging him. She always feels cold, but her hugs always warm him. He closes his eyes, lets himself sink into her embrace.

“I love you too,” Zuko whispers to her shoulder. “You’re enough for me too. More than I could ever wish for.”

She sits back, cradling Zuko’s face with gentle chilling hands. Her eyes watch, and a smile formed on her face, “Has anyone told you how beautiful your eyes are?”

Zuko huffs amusedly at her topic change, “Don’t flatter something not worth flattering about. It’s genetic. Royal descendants of the Fire nation have this eye color, said it looks like gold. I just think it’s plain old yellow.”

“Hmm, I think yours are more like honey instead of gold. A labor of love from nature, sweet, beautiful, and good for the body and soul.”

Zuko blushes, looking away. “When I gave you my collection of fiction books, that doesn’t mean you get to implement it.”

“Nuh-uh. You’re so good at writing romantic poems, I decide that maybe it could be my thing too.” She looks smugly at Zuko’s flushed face, “I think I succeed pretty well for my first try.”

Not denying it, Zuko only sighs fondly at her and helps her up. Only then he realizes the ring of guards surrounding him, sending cold realization down his spine. Zuko just had a meltdown at the Nothern Water Tribe princess in the middle of the port. Her hand on his tighten as her father walks towards them. Zuko is only a few fingers shorter than him, yet he still feels being towered over.

Should’ve thought of the sensitiveness of political climate before having an outburst. Can you blame him? It’s not like anyone taught Zuko how to handle his breakdowns in his years-long solitary, he had to teach that himself and he’s the worst teacher ever. Zuko wasn’t taught anything at all, he never went to school again after his imprisonment. Now everything is confusing, he had to tread carefully and hope things don’t break. Yue, the only person that he can’t break, holds him.

“What have you done to my daughter?” Chief Arnook gazes low at him, glaring, powerfully overbearing. He could flick a finger and Zuko would be drowned at sea if he so wishes to. Like how his father could burn him in an audience when he wants to.

“Father, I’m afraid that the fault is mine. I might have said something insensitive to the prince,” Yue says, wearing a convincing shame.

“You should stop covering for the prince’s sake,” Chief Arnook sniffed, his degrading look never moving from Zuko. It boggles one mind how a man that thinks so little of Zuko ever meant to marry him to his prized daughter. He wouldn’t do well at Fire Nation politics. “He raises his voice at you, not one accomplished of a prince. I certainly didn’t raise you that way.”

Zuko wants to snap that no one has raised him since he’s thirteen other than a kind old maid that’s only been kind and never opinionated against him out of fear. But he doesn’t, because at least even before he’s thirteen, he came out of the womb learning politics.

“Father,” Yue says patiently, her eyes looking besottedly at her father is one of a mask that Zuko can tell. Yet her father seems slightly moved. “I know how well you taught me, and I know perfectly how important our union is. Prince Zuko was not angry at me, merely at some circumstances.”

“I apologize as well.” Zuko puts up as best he can. “I should not have lost my composure. It will never happen again.”

Chief Arnook looks between them, the scowl everlasting. Then he sneers at Zuko, “Remember the hand who feeds you and that you are in our house.”

With that, Chief Arnook turns and walks away, bringing most of the guards with him. Two familiar ones stuck back, they don’t look as murderous as the others, funnily enough. They’re Yue’s personal guards that are always been following them.

“I’m sorry about that,” Zuko says, “I shouldn’t have yelled at you.”

“You were angry on my behalf, as of yours too,” Yue rubs the sleeves of Zuko’s winter blue jacket. “I can’t be upset about that.”

Zuko sighs at her kindness, sometimes she gives them so freely often when people don’t deserve it, including Zuko. Zuko offers his arm that she takes, the movement is instinctual and fluid as they start to walk.

“I take it your father didn’t tell you the truth?” Zuko follows her as she leads towards the steps towards the cliffed coastline. The guards follow behind at a distance enough to not be able to hear low whispers.

“No,” She sighed. “I asked him the other day why we can’t wed as soon as possible after I told him how wonderful you are.”

Zuko nods, knowing he said the same thing to uncle Iroh about her. It was their plan. They’re not gonna meet anyone better than each other with their circumstances, and for their benefit, the marriage would be wonderful for them. They know there’s something insidious working behind the scene, but sikes on them, Zuko and Yue are thick as thieves and want to go through with it anyways. Zuko wonders though, how did that come to be.

“Have you ever wondered how we got so close?” Zuko asks.

She turns to him and smiles amusedly, “I’ve never seen this side of you.”

Zuko quirked an eyebrow, “What side?”

“Your curious side. Ever since you arrived forty days ago, you’ve been polite, considerate, and very kind, but you’ve also been very defeated, retreated, and somberly accepting of everything. Now you’re curious, you’re no longer taking things laying down.”

Of course she’s right, which begs the question of whether or not curiosity is a wise thing to have in a situation like this.

Zuko stays firm though, it isn’t just about him anymore. “It’s highly convenient for us to be engaged, but I think it’s dangerous if we keep fooling ourselves that this union is solely for peace when both sides are clearly hiding something. Something dangerous enough to not trust the two teenagers they’re marrying off with basic information.” Zuko had never felt more confident in his conclusion and gut feeling, something is just not right.

Yue looks at him with big blue eyes, stunned, “You would’ve made a great Fire Lord.”

Zuko flinched hard, both mind and body, “Yu-Yue, don’t joke like that.”

“No, it’s true… Sorry, it’s just… You always told me how good of a Chief I’ll be someday, I thought you like to dream too.”

“You being Chief is way more achievable than me being the Fire Lord,” Zuko looks down to his hand, never seeing fire again. “No non-firebenders ever become a Fire Lord.”

“And no woman ever becomes Chief, but I still entertain the idea.” Yue smiles smugly, “I would make a great Chief. I might not able to in a formal sense, but I’m still the princess. No matter who I marry to, my voice will not be tamped down.”

Zuko stands five fingers taller than her, but even now, he looks up to her with absolute wonder. “I believe you,” and Zuko meant it with his whole soul.

+++++

“Tell me they’re not pulling my leg.”

Yue looks up from her breakfast, “Good morning to you too.”

“Yue! This is serious. I woke up seeing a flying buffalocowplatypus, and your guard told me that the spirits-damned avatar is here, an airbender avatar!”

“Oh, yeah, no it’s true, and it’s a bison, a flying bison. What even is buffalo cow platypus?”

“How are you so calm about this!”

“I’m still reeling at the fact,” She gazes down at her salted seal meat and pan-fried bannock bread, eating them absent-mindedly.

Unlike her, the fact comes crashing down pretty fast for Zuko. “You know what this means?” Still awry, he quickly marches towards the fire pit, making a small fire and using all his panic to enlarge the fire immediately. He boils some pine needle tea.

“The war is really coming to an end. The avatar lives, and he exists. He’ll put an end to all this,” Zuko continues as he gazes down the fire, relaxing as it follows his breath.

Zuko lets the silence wash over them, not for her benefit, however. It was a sin of his ancestor's undoing, but Zuko can’t help to feel the guilt that transcends time. A part of him crippled after knowing that there used to be four types of benders in the world, four nations and that the Fire Nation is the reason that’s not a fact anymore.

His lessons told him that the air nomads are savages, so are the water tribes, but getting engaged to the princess of the said tribe and spending close to two months with its society quickly undo all Fire Nation propaganda. They could easily be wrong about the air nomads, most likely so. Yue told him that the air nomads are actually peaceful, and the majority of its people are monks. It made his guilt dig deeper.

But the avatar is here, apparently an air nomad that had been extinct for a hundred years, the only one alive.

Zuko sits across her with a dull thump, pouring her tea. He can see her silence is from disbelieve, while his is from guilt.

“You’re going to be free,” Zuko’s words finally got her attention. Her lips parted when wide eyes met his.

“So will you.”

Zuko’s pessimism tamps down the hope, but he can’t help but think. Maybe once there’s true peace and there will be a space for his life.

Zuko and Yue go down to the city, hoping to see the Avatar even though there’s a welcoming ceremony later tonight, just a small banquet. Both of them are too eager to see the avatar from an annihilated nomad for a hundred years. He must’ve been really old.

Yet as they walk along the river path, what they found is a gangly bunch of children on a boat on the river roads, on the way to the palace. Zuko recognizes the uniform and tattoos from school (it felt such a long time ago since he last attends school). But what’s weird is the avatar himself, from someone that came from an extinct nomad a hundred years ago, he looks like he cannot be older than 13.

Zuko was about to squeeze another manic rant but stopped when he saw Yue gazing at the boy beside the avatar. They’re using the same blue uniform as the locals, but it has a distinctively different style. Instead of thick sweaters covered with vests lined with fur and tapered outline, they have parkas and modest dresses. Zuko had never seen her so enamored, and she’s blushing! The boy she’s looking at is just as enamored as her, even more. Zuko doesn’t blame him, Yue is ethereally beautiful. Her looks turn heads so far back someone even walked into the river roads. And Zuko doesn’t blame her too, the boy is very appealing and his heart-eyes seems kind, different than the other boy’s eyes looking at her.

Alas, the boat takes them away, while the boy spins his head backward to look at her until they are absolutely out of sight.

“I know that look,” Zuko says amusedly, seeing how Yue snaps her gaze at him with an even more furious blush.

“Oh, please. Don’t tell me you don’t see it,” She pouts, arms crossing.

“I didn’t say that,” Zuko says smugly. “Why don’t you sit next to him at tonight’s banquet? And um… Maybe don’t introduce me yet.”

Yue’s expression fell, “Why?”

“Well, he likes you, you like each other. We don’t know yet whether he ox-chickens out when he figures out you’re betrothed.”

“Oh, you’re right!” Yue gazes in what Zuko named her ‘thinking face’. “I just realized that this might be odd for any other people. We’re technically engaged, I’m wearing your engagement necklace right now… why didn’t I feel guilty,” She says, seemingly perturbed.

Zuko’s answer to that is simpler than the complexity she makes it sound, “I think you’ll love him differently than me.”

Yue splutters, “Love! I’ve only met eyes with him, we didn’t even share a conversation yet!”

“It took us one look without words as well.”

“You’re different.”

Zuko raises his eyebrow, “And how is that?”

“I feel that there is a pull in me towards the sea, I’ve felt it for as long as I live. I’d play close to shore, wishing I could swim so I can follow this tug. The pull ceased when you stepped off the ship that day. While this boy…” Yue looks back, “He just seems adorable, and sweet.”

Zuko doesn’t know which to talk about first. To question the pull Yue feels or to point out that the way she looks at him is way more than just because a boy is adorable. Yet Zuko doesn’t want to dampen the lovestruck look in her eyes.

“See? Different,” Zuko goes back to his point.

“And you’ll be okay with this?” Yue asks with big eyes, and how could Zuko say no?

“I told you before, there’s little I won’t give to you.”

“I understand that, but I’m asking if you’re actually okay with it. Are you… Are you capable in jealousy?”

Zuko thinks, “In this case, no.” Zuko rubs the back of his neck at this revelation, “I don’t know. I just… I know I love you, but not the way you’ll love that boy. I want you to be happy, is all.”

“I’m happy with you.”

“But you could be happier, and I’ll be the last thing standing between you and your happiness.”

Yue hums, fond and amused, “How do you know I’ll love him?”

“Let’s just say, I have an intuition.”

Yue smiles, “I understand completely.”

++++

Just as predicted, Yue hit it off with the boy whose name they’ve learned is Sokka. Zuko and Yue sit with the three guests in between, Sokka’s sister Katara sits right in the middle between Sokka and the Avatar named Aang. Yue takes Sokka’s side, which leaves Aang with Zuko.

It's a wonder to be sitting next to the living legend and an officially endangered society instead of extinct. The last one survived. Zuko takes the chance to educate himself, asking about Aang’s heritage and culture. It seems to be a hotkey for Aang because the kid goes on and on and on about everything. He seems passionate about his culture and not shy in sharing it. When he bends the air and makes two marbles spin between his palms, Zuko feels like he’s seeing a ghost. Hearing about an airbender and seeing an airbender air bends is way more different than he predicted.

Aang is positive and cheerful, his whole ideology is about peacefulness and balance. How on Spirits green earth did the Fire Nation slay them in cold blood? All of that genocide, for what? War? To ‘improve the whole world’ with Fire Nation’s ‘blessing’? Isn’t that just greed and ego? A whole society of peaceful nomads was killed and extinct just because his grandfather’s ego is as big as the whole world.

“Hey, you’re okay there buddy?” Aang says, patting Zuko’s back. “Here, have some tea. It’s lukewarm now. I wish I could bend fire so I could make it warmer but I couldn’t.” The boyish expression falters as he said it.

“Thank you, avatar Aang,” Zuko smiles as he takes the offered cup. Warmth is heat, not fire, so not even Zuko can make it warmer.

The avatar splutters, “Ah, well, I’m not the avatar yet, I barely could master water, and…” a forlorn expression takes over the boy’s face, far too old for such a young face. “…I couldn’t even control fire. Last time I did, I hurt Katara.”

Zuko, despite his fluidity in talking with Yue, is still an awkward boy when faced with sudden openness of emotions like this. Yue has always been open too, but it’s less weepy and she’s patient when Zuko is being confusing or stumbling with his words.

This is the avatar. How in the holy spirits above do you console a thirteen-year-old avatar the sole kind of his people that was caused by your nation’s genocidal tendencies?

Zuko pats Aang’s shoulder, “That’s rough buddy.”

Aang just shrugs, and Zuko felt some guilt and responsibility for this boy’s trouble on behalf of his people. Zuko’s people did damn Aang as the last of the nomads that could’ve helped his character development. So, the least Zuko can do is do a better job at cheering him up.

“You know, fire isn’t just a dangerous and hurting thing. It’s also life. Firebending isn’t just fire, it’s heat, and without heat, there’s no life. There’s heat in you, in animals, and even plants. It’s also light, the makes the plants flourish, dries your clothes, and helps us see, and uh…” Zuko trails, trying hard to remember what his homeschool teacher had explained about fire except for power, weapon, and glory.

Aang then says, “How could you still say that when you’re so badly hurt by it?” Aang splutters when Zuko caught him staring at his scar. “I-I’m sorry! I didn’t mean to stare. You’re right and all but I-”

“No, it’s fine.” No, it’s not. It’s actually pretty uncomfortable that someone he barely knew pointed it out. Some people politely ignored it. They don’t have to be good at this either. Then again, this is the avatar, and what kind of avatar is afraid of learning one of the elements? A young scarred one, that’s what. Zuko has a feeling that beating and burning him into learning like his father did won’t be as effective for the green joyful avatar. He knows another way, more private, but he owed this to the avatar on behalf of his nation.

“Someone… Someone close to me made this scar, intentionally, to punish me. But I never blamed the fire, only the person who did it.” Zuko felt bare, and he didn’t know what came over him. They're still sitting at the banquet in the same room as dozens of people, but the moment he sees Aang’s eyes widen, he knew Aang needed to hear it. “You were learning, Aang, accidents happen. I’m sorry that she got hurt. Don’t blame the fire, just be a better wielder… a kinder wielder. So far, you’re a pretty cool kid. I believe you’ll use firebending as best and as true as it’s supposed to be... um, be kind about it?"

Aang’s eyes open so wide, and after he picked up his jaw, he smiles ear to ear. “You’re so wise for a teenager!”

Zuko bristles at the sudden statement, “Teenagers can be wise! My age has nothing to do with being knowledgable.” And boy does Zuko’s big head truly believe in that.

“Sure do! Hey, are you a waterbender? Do you mind teaching me? We flew here to learn waterbending. Katara said there are lots here and I feel like you’ll be a great teacher!”

Zuko blinks at the train of nonstop words, “Um, no, I’m not a bender.”

“Oh, do you know who could teach me?”

“There’s Master Pakku. Yue told me he’s the best waterbending teacher in the North pole.”

“I’ll ask him right after the banquet! Which this is all really nice and everything. Hey, what do you do here in your free time?”

Zuko had lived here and spent time with Yue long enough to fill the avatar about the locals’ past times, cuisine, and even culture. Zuko doesn’t realize how knowledgeable he is in the tribe’s tradition, even though the people had either been treating him with bitter disinterest or careful avoidance. Zuko counts his blessings, at least it’s not violence.

Aang is telling him how Katara found him frozen in a block of ice in the south pole. She cracks his ice and Aang somehow still survived after being frozen for a hundred years. Zuko doesn’t want to believe it, even though it’s the only explanation of how Aang exists at this time at thirteen. Aang roped Katara for a fact check, who then confirms that it’s both crazy and true.

Eventually, Katara is roped to their conversation too. She’s a very passionate girl about waterbending and her culture. There’s a fierceness in her eyes that’s similar to Azula, yet hers are fueled with a determination of knowledge while Azula has always been a conquerer.

The joy doesn’t last long however when Aang asked to be taught by Pakku with Katara, the only waterbender from the Southern Water Tribe that wants in too. Then Zuko found out how scary the girl is.

Zuko had never felt true horror until he sees the fourteen-year-old girl square up against a waterbending master years her senior. Turns out he’s not alone with this anxiety. Sokka, her big brother, is biting his nails at the duel. Though he then soon figured that Sokka is anxious in a different way.

“Hey, you’re her brother!” Zuko told the boy, who looks at him with wide eyes, “Stop her before she gets hurt!”

“Oh, man, there’s no stopping Katara when she gets to things. And to be honest, that Pakku guy is a massive dick.”

Zuko blinks at the bluntness, “Pakku is a waterbending master, the best one in the tribe.”

“Yeah, a dick waterbending master.”

Zuko looks around, making sure that no one is listening to them and focused on the duel about to happen. “Yes, Pakku is a misogynist jerk with some alpha male complex, but he’s still a master, fully able to leave your sister to dust.”

Sokka raised an eyebrow, “Katara isn’t weak. I’m just worried that she’s gonna intentionally kill the guy.”

As they watch, Katara does fully intend to kill Pakku. She goes absolutely feral, and even Pakku looks worried.

While they watch, Zuko not only witnesses how strong Katara is, but also how Sokka’s worry turns into cheerings of ‘Yeah Katara, decimate his ass!’ and gestures of what Zuko thinks is his suggestions of fighting moves. He looks supportive of her. From what Zuko deduced, Sokka is a non-bender, but there’s no jealousy, he fully roots on her. It made him miss Azula, also guilt, he hasn’t been encouraging of her better progress, Zuko was too deep in envy and insecurity.

Zuko also realized how open and genuine his expressions are. He fits perfectly with the assertive and calm Yue.

Water flinging everywhere, and Zuko’s musing is broken when a splash of water landed on Sokka and only on Sokka. Zuko stays dry even when he’s right beside him. Sokka notices this too and whines, “Oh come one!”

In the end, Pakku raises as a victor, which isn’t surprising. What’s surprising is the turnout. Zuko feels like he’s watching a really good theater. The betrothal necklace Katara wears isn’t hers, but her mom’s that passed down from her grandma’s which was given from Pakku before said grandma ran away from the Nothern Water Tribe to live free from the tribe’s misogynistic system. Whew.

This then leads Pakku to learn that he’s wrong and agrees to teach Katara. A weird thought process though how only by being heartbroken for decades that Pakku realized that misogyny is bad. But hey, this is a happy ending, because Katara gets to learn combat waterbending from the best.

At the end of the day, Zuko finds Yue and asks her, “So, how’s Sokka?” even though he already knew what her answer is.

“Zuko!” Yue runs down the hallway, “He’s so wonderful!”

Zuko smiles at her excitement, he could tell that she barely gets to feel it. “Tell me all about it.”

The rest of the day is spent with her gushing over Sokka, and Zuko thinks she looks beautiful when she’s in love.

+++++

The excitement of the newcomer is on high time when things go south. The next day after the small banquet, Yue drags Zuko with her to meet the guests.

“I want to introduce you to them!” Yue says, holding his arm.

“Is this necessary?” Zuko says forlornly. As much as he wants to talk with Aang more and get to know Sokka and Katara, Zuko felt like he’ll be intruding. Intruding from Aang’s and Katara’s learning, and intruding on Yue’s time with Sokka.

“So, what do you suggest I do? Hide you forever?”

“It’s not like they’re gonna be here forever,” Zuko felt bad saying it when he sees Yue’s face wilts.

“Stop, it’s okay, I knew that,” Yue says when he sees Zuko’s mouth open to start an apology. “You’re very important to me Zuko, one of the most important in my life. I don’t want to hide you just because I have new friends.”

In the short amount of time, Yue had become Zuko’s best friend, a close companion, bonded mysteriously but indisputably. Yet she won’t understand how precious the words she just said. Zuko knows he’s important to his uncle, only one out of three of what’s left of his family members. He knows he’s important to auntie Iza, and Zuko had thought she was a blessing, an undeserved kindness, perhaps mercy. Even though walking out of that homemade prison is freedom, it also tore him away from what he thought was his only piece of mercy. Until now.

Zuko holds her hand, he can’t help the free smile on his face, “Well, when you put it that way.”

Zuko is nervous as they walked to the guest hut for the travelers. They’re visiting at dawn, the time when Pakku’s first class starts for Katara and Aang. They’re bringing a basket of breakfast and good wishes. Zuko makes sure he’s proper. Hair straight and put together. Usually, he’d wear his traditional topknots with one of Yue’s hair ties, but as of lately, he’s been tying half his hair in a wolf tail like the local men do. The nervousness all paid off, however, at the sight of Yue’s excited face as she knocks on their door.

“Who on La’s blue sea and Tui’s bright moon could be awake at the crack of- Yue!” Sokka’s sleepy face instantly brightened. Then noticing Zuko beside Yue, “Oh, and you… the dude from… that time.”

Zuko and Yue both chuckle at him, which makes poor Sokka blush.

“Sokka! Who is- Oh, Zuko, hello.” Katara popped from behind her brother. She’s standing from a crockpot, cooking something savory, and nods at Zuko.

“Zuko! Hey, my good dude!” Aang bounced outside, hugging Zuko. Zuko had a whole-body reaction of turning into a rock from the embrace. He pats the boy’s back and awkwardly chuckles. “What are you guys doing here?”

“We want to give you good wishes for your first class with Pakku,” Yue nods to Zuko.

“Here,” Zuko gives Katara the basket of goods. “It’s all supposedly nutritious and good for strength. I recommend taking the honey-slime after class, it’s said to reduce muscle soreness from strenuous work.”

“Wow, thanks so much Zuko, Yue,” Katara cheers, checking the rest of the basket.

“Wait you both know this guy too?” Sokka says, eyeing Zuko awkwardly (at his scar) as he finally snapped from ogling at Yue.

“If you haven’t been swooning over Yue all day yesterday you would’ve known Zuko too,” Katara chastised.

“I was sitting next to Aang at the banquet,” Zuko helps, trying to. Sokka doesn’t look guilty at all, and Zuko is only slightly affronted that the boy doesn’t find him interesting at all.

“Zuko! You didn’t tell me you’ve talked to all three of them,” Yue gasps, and lightly punched his bicep.

“Ow,” Zuko says with no heat. “As you know, I would’ve told you yesterday if you didn’t spend the whole yesterday gushing about a certain someone.”

“Oh, oops,” Yue blushes as Zuko chuckles at her. He finds Sokka looking at them both confusedly at first, and now even more confused with a little hope. Zuko wished he could just tell the guy it’s not as hopeless as it seems and just goes for it, spirits know their time is limited.

“I’m sorry for the late introductory,” Yue recovers, holding Zuko’s elbows like she always does, but Sokka is eyeing it like it’s the enemy of the state. If only Zuko knows. “This is my best friend Zuko, Prince of Fire Nation. Also, my fiance.”

The air changed in a snap. The friendly faces of their new friends changed into cold stiff shock and unmistakably betrayal.

The thunderous faces make Yue nervous, hell, Zuko didn’t even think she’d so far to tell them that he’s her fiance yet. She must’ve trusted them and it sadly didn’t pay off. Strangely, when Yue is the one nervous, Zuko finds strength.

“It’s nothing like that though,” Zuko puts on an easy political smile. “It was an arranged marriage to form peace between Fire Nation and the Nothern Water Tribe. Not that we hate each other. I’ve been here a couple of months and we love and respect each other-”

“Hah,” barks a cruel tone, it was from Katara, and Zuko sees in her the same fury she had when she was about to kill Pakku. Even worse, there’s vengeance there. “Did you hear that? An ashmaker capable of respect and love, what a laugh!”

A downpour of chills runs down his spine. He looks at Yue who meets his eyes with the same realization but a different reflection. While Zuko is solemn with shame, and Yue a cold fury.

“I never expect you to be so rude,” Yue says coldly, her whole blushing demeanor changed into a stone-cold princess. “The war is over a year ago, no need to-”

“The war is-” Sokka scoffs, eyes rolling and gesticulating angrily, “The war was never over! Yue, don’t believe what he’s telling you,” Sokka’s eyes turn pleading towards the princess.

Yue shakes her head, “Even if that’s true, it’s not Zuko’s fault.” Yue stands back from the trio, and holds Zuko’s hand.

Not to lie, Zuko had that small doubt that Yue wouldn’t side with him. Yet the reassuring cold hand of hers does nothing from the red-hot shame he felt. Especially when Katara takes center, eyes blazing with anger, blue fire, like Azula… like Azula.

“When I was eight years old, an army of Fire Nation soldiers came to our village to search for the last waterbender we had.” Her voice is low but loud and angry. Making of a storm as she steps forward with chest up. Even Yue is intimidated and her mask of calmness cracks, Zuko doesn’t pretend. He’s horrified, even more, when people started coming out, watching. Katara sees it too and starts to speak even louder.

“Six years ago, a Fire Nation raid landed on the Southpole in search of the rumor that there is one last waterbender. My mother protected me and lied that she was the last one, she was killed on her spot… at our home!” She screams, eyes on Zuko filled with tears. “Before that, they raid our tribe and took ALL of our waterbenders, that was why they came back six years ago. When we asked for our waterbenders back after this so-called ‘peace’, we are met with laughter! When our able-bodied men march to get them back, they are captured and had never been returned till this day!”

Katara heaved and continue, “So tell me where is our father? Why he never returns with our tribe’s fathers, husbands, and sons if this so-called war is over? You are all fooled by him!” Katara points her finger at Zuko, who freeze at the gesture.

“Not only that!” Sokka says with the same conviction, not even wavering at Yue’s look of pleading to safe Zuko. “A Fire Nation princess attacked our tribe just last month! All blue fire and blazing. She tried to capture the avatar and melted our igloos in rage! And all of you truly believe that the war is over?? I know you don’t step out of your tribe but come on man!”

Zuko feels light in the head, stunned silent. So many things to process. Not only the violence, but the first news he heard of Azula is that she tried to capture the avatar and failed. Azula never fails. She won’t admit it, and she’ll never accept it, and she’d try and try again until she succeeds.

It means they must be coming here, Zuko had to warn them.

Before he gets to pipe a word, however, he’s surrounded by the guards. Well, he and Yue.

“Is that true?” Come a groveling voice of Chief Arnook, the crowd part to let him through.

And what could Zuko say? The truth? The whole convoluted truth? Would they even believe that he hasn’t been royalty for three years and had been locked up inside a house? That yes they’re not technically lying that Zuko is still a Prince since the demotion is impossible to do, so he kept the title but Zuko has no power at all to rule or even make any command over the nation. The marriage was a sham from the very beginning but Yue and Zuko didn’t care about it. Now that thing matters the most and had become their undoing.

“I don’t know what happened outside of Fire Nation,” Zuko says, “I was not involved in the Fire Lord’s meeting since I was thirteen.”

“I find that hard to believe. Are you not heir to the throne?”

“No, he’s not,” Sokka says before Zuko can. “Azula is the heir, she declared it like a hundred times.”

“I see, then General Iroh had lied,” Chief Arnook looks down on Zuko, “He promised us the heir of the throne.”

“That’s not true!” Yue speaks up, “You know full well going in that he wasn’t and accepted anyway!”

Chief Arnook had a slight waver that his own daughter had pointed in public that he lied, but he stands tall and everyone else still stands with him.

“Prince Zuko of Fire Nation. We are taking you to court for your crimes.”

“On what charges?!” Yue barks.

“Fraud, and crimes of war.”

“This is ridiculous! None of us are involved in the talks, how could Zuko be responsible for it all!”

“He’s the Prince of Fire Nation is he not?”

Zuko contemplates speaking the truth, but he knows none of them will believe him. Not the people that matter anyway. All of them look at him with contempt, anger, betrayal, especially Katara and Sokka. While Aang looks confused and scared.

Fear had not struck him until he realized where he’s led to. The pointed edge of the cutoff shore. A steep cliff to the ocean below. Zuko often walks in this area with Yue to see the sea, the Chief had warned both kids not to go too near. Foot soldiers pointed their spears at him, backing him off to the edge. Zuko feels his knees weak when he looks down and sees sharp jagged bed of rocks in the bottom. Not only that, though small, he can see clearly the skeletons and rotten bloated bodies wearing the Fire Nation armory from decades ago. Some color of reds had faded, some still red as blood. Some metal still gleams, some rusted over.

“What are you doing!” Yue’s shrill yell snaps him from staring down. She’s facing her father with head high, for Zuko. “This is not the right trial! This is condemnation!”

Unshaken, Chief Arnook stares, “It is, for war criminals.”

At the word, Yue pales. Anger changed into desperation and fear. Zuko knows then, that there will be no trial in the right factual sense. “This is insane! Zuko isn’t a war criminal, he was just a baby when the Fire Nation raided the Southern Water Tribe! You can’t kill him for a crime he didn’t do!”

“Whoa hold up, what’s all this talk about killing?” Sokka stiffly. All of the sudden, his anger melts away, along with, surprisingly, Katara. She’s hell-bent on murder but all that dropped and her eyes widen, tense.

“Guys, I think we should all sit down and talk, there seems to be a misunderstanding.” Aang finally pipes in from shock.

Chief Arnook ignores them, “Prince Zuko of Fire Nation, do you deny the charges of the acts of your army.”

Zuko blinks at suddenly being talked to, everyone’s eyes look at him with ranges of emotions. Disgust from the aunties that had helped him cook, spend an afternoon, and fit in. Anger from the father, the guards, the men. Tenseness from his new friends, and heart-breaking fear from Yue. He knows from her tone talking to her dad, there’s no justice for people deemed war criminal. If her face isn’t knowledgeable enough, the bodies behind him are.

Doesn’t mean Zuko will go down without saying his truth, not without trying

His voice is loud and clear, trying to be as monotone as possible to hide his fright. “The Fire Nation army isn’t mine. I was dishonored since I was thirteen by the Fire Lord for disrespecting him in a war room. I refused to fight in an Agni Kai with my father that is considered an act of shame. He then burned me for shaming him and exiled me into house arrest. I was stripped of my power as royalty, but still a prince only in name. I lost my bending at the same time, which then stripped me from my right from being the heir. I was thirteen years old on house arrest until I was told to marry your daughter three years later. In the interim, I never stepped outside of my confinement. The only person I converse with is a maid.” At the mention, he ached for auntie Iza, he had told his uncle to tell her he’s fine. There it is, all his story bared in front of all the tribesmen. Zuko feels too afraid to feel shame.

“And where is your proof of this?” Steps in an elder of the tribe, one of the councils Chief Arnook has by his side. “We are not told this by your uncle. No sob stories of a banished Prince.” He sniffed.

“Lies!” Yue barges, “You know that he was banished!”

“Yes, but not that he’s not even considered royalty anymore,” he says as if he wasn’t just admitted that he lied.

“The wedding was for two royalties with equal power for peace,” Chief Arnook softens for the first time since he spoke, albeit it’s always with his daughter. He reaches for her hand, “He does not deserve you, my dear.”

Yue scowls and slaps his hand away. A few people gasps. “So you plan to murder him for Fire Nation’s sins? He was not even in the talks! I wasn’t too and I only knew because I sneaked an ear! How is it his fault?”

“Not directly,” Sniffs one of the elders, which makes Yue boils in even more anger.

“Why do you think he’s here in the first place, child?” another elder speaks as if to an insolent child. “He’s here as a guarantee that the Fire Nation kept their promises of peace and our trade deals. True, that the war has only been over for roughly a year, but as we had all learned,” The elder steps forward and speak for the crowd. “The Fire Nation still retaliates as spoken from our brethren tribe. A Fire Nation Princess had tried to take the Avatar with violence. The Fire Lord had broken his promise for peace and failed to give us his cooperation in restrengthening our tribe to repay his war crimes, and so…” old cold eyes look at Zuko, wind bellows, “… The Fire Lord knows what he was sacrificing with the prince still in our hands as he broke his promise.”

Zuko and Yue share a look of realization. That was it. That was the only reason there are engaged. Zuko had turned from a prisoner to another with Yue as his chain and the tribe as his cell. Was there ever peace if Zuko needed to be held over for guarantee and the Fire Nation never planned to concord anyway?

“I see,” Chief Arnook looks around the elders that give him firm nods. “Prince Zuko of Fire Nation, as the representative of Fire Nation, its crime condemned you guilty. We hereby punish you with a cliff walk-off.”

“No!” Yue screams, and it was the last thing Zuko hears in a jumble of words.

Chief Arnook tried to console his daughter and send him dirty glares as if Yue defending him was Zuko’s fault. Aang tried to make them see how inhumane this is. Sokka tried to stop the guards that’s inching closer towards Zuko with their metal pointed spears. Katara is barking at Pakku to stop this, which ended with another waterbender fighting pose ready to deck him again.

The soldiers come closer, snow crunched in their feet in turns of the waves pulling back. Crunch, swoosh, crunch, swoosh, like ticking of a clock. Zuko backed and backed until his feet finally meets the utmost edge of the cliff. His heart beats like a bumblebird, and his blood runs cold. This is it. Zuko gulps as he looks down at the bodies of his people. It's so many. The reds of their armor made it look like the rock is still bleeding.

“Enough!” Aang screamed, he jumps and slams his staff to the ground between Zuko and the guards. Aang’s wind blows the guards backward. “This is cruel! What you’re doing is not better than what the Fire Nation had done to my people years ago! They made assumptions of our culture and slay us blind!”

“Don’t you dare compare us to filthy warmongers,” Snaps an elder. Aang is powerful, but he’s no match when the senior waterbender washes him away from where he’s standing and freezes him.

Fast movements happen. Katara tried to fight the elders and Pakku, again. Sokka is holding a boomerang, trying to stop the guards. Aang is trying to undo the ice encapsulating him, but he couldn’t yet. Yue is in tears, being held back by her father and two other people. Zuko doesn’t even see when waterbender soldiers replace the foot soldiers, forming ice spikes to hang over his head to jump. His eyes are on Yue’s tears as she tried to get the waterbenders to lower their spikes. They even seemed nervous at her command, but not enough to stop.

The cold fear that’s been freezing him had melted along the time he stands here at the point of no return and no walking away. He’s reminded of a feeling way back at home that he is coming to an end. Everything makes sense in a horrid yet sure way. Waves crash upon the rocks, the wind blows his hair awry, sending a chill down his neck. Yet somehow, the chill isn’t uncomfortable, it reminded him of Yue’s cold hands.

Zuko’s eyes find Yue’s tearful ones. Yue’s desperation and anger melt when they look at each other, an understanding passes between them.

“Zuko no, please!”

Zuko smiles tearfully. He’s still scared out of his mind, but what else could he do? He’s in a tribe full of people that demanded justice they are starved for. Fire Nation takes and takes, using everything for war. Their peace was a cheap strategy and Zuko is a disposable gambling piece, Zuko knew that even though only in gut feeling. This is the role a prince like him had been assigned to, the only worth his father sees him.

Zuko doesn’t want to die, but this is his obligation. His life had stopped being his years ago.

“Whenever you feel the pull towards the sea, know that I’ll always be with you,” Zuko says with all the calm he had left. Eyes blurred with tears and cold trails down his cheek. He’s afraid and so, so angry. It’s not fair. A story of his life that he can’t re-write, only to read till the end.

Zuko doesn’t jump, he doesn’t want to so he won't until he’s pushed. Yet the guards didn’t push him either.

The cliff is 200 meters tall. It should be impossible for the waves to be taller than that, it’s unheard of. Yet a wall of blue raises and washes over parts of the tip of the ground. The guards ducked and stepped back in time, except for Zuko who had been at the furthest end, now nowhere to be seen.

The fighting seized, and they stare upon where the prince once stood in shocked silence. The first one to move is Yue, and the second is her father to stop her. She brushes everyone off harshly and kneels upon the edge, trying to find the blue uniform amongst the faded old reds.

There is none.

The following hours since Zuko died, Yue doesn’t speak no matter who spoken to her. His father tried gentle consoling, eventually with anger. Then he commands her, which she retaliates.

“Am I truly this tribe’s princess if my opinion isn’t deemed as one? That I was old enough to marry, but not old enough to be regarded as a Princess for my opinion to matter? I was not regarded as a princess, so why should I heed your command when I find it personally against my agenda? Just like how you killed my fiance for your personal agenda,” She speaks loud and clear to all then leave first.

Sokka tried to apologize, even Katara and Aang too. Clearly, it wasn’t an outcome they expected, they didn’t know the hatred their sister tribe had with the Fire Nation is deep enough to throw a child off a cliff. A fire nation raid killed Yue’s mom after all, and his father has been deeply scarred by it. They also don’t know about Zuko at all, what he had been through, and his background. They’re blinded by justified hatred that was caused by pain, she can never blame them for that. She bet they didn’t even know he’s a non-bender until he said so by the cliff.

Yue pats them by the arms, “It’s not your fault, I don’t blame you.” And that was the last words Yue uttered until hours that follows.

She walks towards the shore, following the pull in her heart. She still believed Zuko is there, with her, she just wished Zuko had stayed longer. He was so young, sixteen years old, punished for things that weren’t his fault. His words ring in her ear, ‘it wasn’t fair’, ‘we deserved a life’. Those words had done little to her numb acceptance that she achieved years ago, now as it sliced her to bleed. Zuko was right, this isn’t fair to him, to her, yet it happened still. It’s not fair, but fairness doesn’t matter in their world.

Yue doesn’t eat, doesn’t drink, doesn’t talk nor sleeps, just sits by the bench along the shoreline, staring at the tides. Her father tried to coax her in, but she says nothing. There is sadness in Chief Arnook’s face, but Yue doesn’t look, doesn’t care.

Nightfalls, and Yue stays, doesn’t eat dinner as well. This time Chief Arnook sends her friends to coax her to eat. The coastline guard approached told them that she’s mourning and would not speak further. Yue looks at them and spares a nod at his friend and the guard. The guard is familiar, son of a senior healer waterbender, she nods at him thankfully. Dinner is left by her side, she doesn’t touch it.

She doesn’t leave the coast even past midnight. At one point her father finally lashes out his frustration at her for her obtuseness. Her face stays stoic, dead to his words, even after her father results to begging.

She’s tired, but couldn’t sleep, even after the sun had started to rise. This pull in her chest keeps her here and keeps getting stronger. Waves crash to rocky black sands, slow and calming. A tide unparticular as the others crashes, seafoam bubbled over and cleared, but as the water draws back, a man with blue parka washed up, face down.

Yue feels the pull stopped and her heart hammers. She can’t believe her eyes. She knows from the hair tie she lent him is still on his hair. She runs towards the body, going faster and sobbing.

“Zuko… Zuko… I’m so sorry,” She sobbed, and as she finally kneels near the body, she was right. Zuko is cold and pale, but it seems as if nothing had happened to him. No broken limbs nor bruises on his face except for his old scar.

She would’ve cried if she hadn’t noticed that Zuko is still breathing. She cradles his face and leans close to feel his breath that’s still warm. She pressed her fingers by his neck and feel a steady pulse.

She cradles him in her lap, “How… how on earth…”

Zuko groans, “Yue?” his voice hoars, barely out.

“Yes! Zuko, I’m here, you’re here,” Yue sobbed and tuck him in her arms, hoping it’ll warm him but also, she’s so glad he’s alive.

“I never thought… that- I was… worthy enough for heaven,” He croaks.

Yue chuckles, albeit a bit manic, “You’re not dead, silly.” She cradles his head and watches him. “Open your eyes, you’ll see… You’re still here Zuko… Dear Tui and La you’re still here.” Yue sobs.

Black eyelashes flutter, and Yue gasps. She almost dropped Zuko’s head, but her shock can wait. So, she froze when a pair of Zuko’s blue eyes are staring at her.

+++++

People stare.

The old healer, and people outside her healing hut. Zuko doesn’t blame them, he would stare too. After all, he didn’t expect to live through being washed away towards the jagged rock bed hundreds of meters below, but here he is, alive. Bundled in thick coats and blankets with a cup of warm soup in his hand because he’s cold. The healer gave him the coats and hot soup when he kept saying he’s cold whenever she asks how he feels. She’s staring too, but her eyes hold a different virtue than the rest.

A few people are sitting with him along with the healer, they’re staring too.

Yue is staring at him, she hasn’t stopped since she told him to open his eyes. Chief Arnook is behind her, staring at him with careful contempt. Between Yue, is Sokka, Katara, and Aang, staring at him too with a wide arrange of expressions. Sokka with blatant shock, Katara in disbelieve, and Aang in wonder. Pakku is beside the crockpot, sipping on the same soup Zuko is holding and the only one that’s not staring at him.

“My son told me Yue found you washed ashore,” says the old healer, Amka.

Zuko blinks at her, “Yes, that’s true.”

“Are you aware that your eye color changed?”

“Yes, I was told by Yue.” Zuko hasn’t seen for himself, a little bit afraid he’d broken down, which if he remembers correctly, wasn’t fun at all.

The healer gestures him to drink. Zuko then realized that he hasn’t eaten his soup. It’s salty, and the meat is fatty, filling. Zuko sighs in contentment at the taste, also a tiny bit surprised he’s alive. He thought for sure he’ll be poisoned instead since being thrown off the cliff doesn’t kill him.

Not comfortable with the vague tension, Zuko finally breaks it.

“So, does this mean I get to live?”

“A tad bit too soon, buddy,” Sokka quips as Yue pales.

“I think I get to decide whether it’s too soon or not, Sokka,” Zuko chastise, though not full-heartedly, he’s too tired soul and body for that. “Why the pleasantries? None of you seem happy I’m here. So, I’m not being saved to be guests, and this is too charitable for a prisoner,” he said to the three old people in the room, all three are scowling somewhat.

“Ah yes, you’re saved alright. It’s who saved you that is peculiar to us, and what we are investigating” Pakku says, not looking away from his bowl.

“Who?”

The two old men looks at the healer, and she heavily sighed. “There was a tale in our culture, long ago when all the four nation is still living in harmony. Agni blesses fire to your royalty, and when his blessed fire harms another, he begged La to mend the pain from what was supposed to be his gift.”

“At night,” Zuko says, “I’ve heard that if you put your burns in the ocean at full moon. The saltwater won't burn, but healed instead.”

The healer nods, “That’s right.”

Sokka blurts “If you’ve known that, then why didn’t you dip your face into the ocean as soon as you got that?”

Katara elbows his ribs, “Sokka!”

“What? We’re all wondering that! I can’t imagine you wouldn’t do it with a burn that bad,” Sokka justified, his eyes looking at him with anger and sadness. Zuko knows the former is not directed at him. It’s somewhat flattering that one more person cares.

“I couldn’t,” Zuko answers. “I was locked inside a house with concrete walls and bars that form a box around the house. There are guards outside the vicinity so I couldn’t get out no matter what. The doors to the outside are always locked.”

Anger washes over his friends. There are whispers of a thousand mouths, and Zuko is made realize that there are still people watching from outside the hut, windows, and doors full of faces. Suddenly Zuko felt burned with shame, he just admitted his most shameful weakness in front of these people, again.

“Locked away… just because you misspoke?” Aang asked dumbly.

Zuko looks at him as if speaking to a child, but then again, the avatar is only thirteen. “It wasn’t my place. It was a real war room and I was only thirteen,” he said, hopefully not too loud that people outside heard.

“Exactly because you’re thirteen!” Katara seethed, Zuko felt a whiplash that she’s defending him, and from people stiffening up. “Who on La’s blue sea punishes a kid with burning!”

“Stop getting off-topic. Now answer me, boy,” Amka walks close to him, they’re face to face, and with her seemingly the only one in his peripheral, Zuko relaxed. “Have you ever sleepwalked towards the ocean?”

Zuko twitched at the odd question. “S-sleepwalked? No, I don’t think so…” Zuko blinks and a memory came. “Sometimes I woke up in a different place from where I slept, but it’s my imagination, I think. Often at the foot of the door, or by the edge of the walls.” Zuko remembered clearly now, he had always brushed it over. “Auntie Iza said I must’ve been tired from playing.” Even though he hadn’t played anything because he was alone and too depressed, Zuko had believed her.

“Don’t you dare lie to me,” Amka grabbed his shoulders, eyes bore into him and her eyes looks… deep, like the endless depth of the sea. Zuko’s whole body stiffen in her hands. “Tell me the truth, did your father’s fire is the one that burned you?”

“Yes,” Zuko says breathlessly. “Yes, he did, in an Agni Kai against him. I told you this.”

“Why?”

“Because I shamed him, for talking up, and even more, when I refused to fight him in said Agni Kai.”

Her frown twitches, “Why did you refuse to fight?”

Zuko chokes, “Because he’s my father, I wouldn’t harm him.”

“Yet he harms you, boy.” He must’ve imagined it, but Amka’s voice sounds softer. “He still burned you even as you lower your hands in the name of love.”

Usually cries whenever this fact bubbled into his consciousness, but nothing drops as he says, “Yes, he does.”

She then dropped her hand. The rushing cold tells him that at some point he had felt warmth. He blinks, and he couldn’t believe that he just said all that. There’s just something about her cold close stare that made him feel… safe.

The silence that follows makes Zuko watches closer how Pakku stiffens, Chief Arnook’s eyes widen and Yue looks sad, so is Aang who looks horrified. There are gasps among the people outside and murmurs that keep getting louder.

“Silence,” Chief Arnook commands firmly.

“What? What is it? Why are you all look like fishes out of water?” Sokka demands.

“Sit up,” Amka orders, putting a bucket of water between her and Zuko. “Come on boy, sit straight up, shoulders.” She grabbed him by the shoulders and curl him outwards to puff his chest. Zuko tried not to wince, her grip is strong for someone who looks so frail. “Repeat my movement.”

She flicks her wrist above the bucket, her hand looks like a tail of a fish. Hesitantly Zuko copied.

“Smoother,” Amka scolds, “Like you’re trying to part water.”

Zuko furrowed his eyebrows, what on earth could that be? He tries though, and Amka grunts. Zuko notices that the surface of the water on the bucket ripples left to right along with Amka’s hand movement.

“Now combine that move with a scoop.” Amka’s hand swish from side to side and flicks up as if scooping water, which is exactly what she did. Water from the bucket coats her hand.

Zuko finally catches on and scowls, “I’m not a waterbender.”

“Just do as I say,” Amka says impatiently.

Zuko furrowed his brow in petulance, but does anyone blame him that less than two hours after he ‘resurrected’, people are bossing him around. Justifiedly, he’s a little pissed off. With a huff, Zuko mimics Amka’s movement. Hand side to side like a fish, and then a scoop-up gesture.

Nothing happens.

“You’re just mimicking my movement, I want you to waterbend, boy,” Amka scolds.

“This is ridiculous!” Zuko scoffs, “I’m not a waterbender! And this is way different than fire bending where the fire came from within us! How do you move something that’s already… there.” Zuko exhales his frustration. He did have some practice in moving fire that already existed, it was all that he could do after being burned.

Zuko focused on the water, and breathe. He repeats the hand movement, this time as if his hand is swimming in the water, and he scoops as if he truly dipped his hand in the water to cradle it.

Bated breath gasps, but Zuko hears nothing but his rapid heartbeat ringing in his ear when water is floating on top of his palm, said water is rippling as hectic as his heartbeat.

“Meh, not perfect but not bad,” Amka’s words breaks Zuko’s shock.

Suddenly, he feels dizzy, and the water pours from his hand. “That-that was not me, no… you! You put that water in my hand!” He points at Amka, “Or you and you!” he points towards the stricken Pakku and awestruck Katara. “You-you… there’s no way.”

“No one here moved but you,” Pakku says bitterly.

“Zuko! That’s really cool!” Aang cheered.

“No! Not cool at all!” Zuko absolutely seething with frustration that he could’ve breathed fire, but he knows he can’t for an absolute fact now. “What is this? What does this mean? What’s happening to me?” In a bout of panic and disbelieve, he finally looks into the bucket to see for himself. However, he didn’t take count how disorienting it is to see a pair of blue eyes looking at him.

It is without a doubt Zuko’s face, complete with the scar, the long black hair surrounding him like a curtain, and his gauntly shaped face. The only difference is the striking blue eyes that look so blue it’s unnatural. It’s so bright, too saturated, it seems as if they’re glowing even. To his surprise, both eyes are equally as bright. Originally his scarred side’s eye is a bit cloudier, but within the squinted scarred eye, the pupil shines blue there too. Yet with that tinge of difference, Zuko almost doesn’t recognize himself.

“You are a child of La. She gives you a gift, and life, just like how Tui gives my daughter her life.” Chief Arnook’s grief voice broke his gaze away from himself towards the man. Zuko thought he’s hallucinating because there’s no way Chief Arnook looks guilty. “La values your life, and we value the children she saved, or we should have. And thus, we apologize.” And to add another anxiety to an already horrifying day, Chief Arnook lowers his head and so are the rest of the people outside.

Zuko, however, had had it with this half-hearted political trash talk. So they only feel bad because a spirit saved him? And not because they’re lying out of their way to push him off the cliff for their false sense of justice? “I didn’t need your apology! I want answers,” Zuko turns to Amka. “How does this happen? Why? Why me? What does it mean?”

“You’re seeking answers we know not, boy,” Amka groans. “All we knew are old tales and occurrences that are told through generations that at times, La heals burns. Yet there are times when La had taken, and she only took children. There are stories about burned Fire Nation children who often walked to the sea and never return. There are stories that long ago, children would wash up in the beaches of either Northern or Southern Water Tribe, we call them children of La. Have you heard of the same stories?” Amka asked the Southern siblings.

“We did,” Sokka says, and Katara nods. “Gran gran used to tell us that story. She said her sister washed up on our beach because ashmakers burned her. We thought…”

“We thought it was just a cautionary tale.” Katara completed solemnly, “We had wanted to go outside the tribe, find our father. We thought she’s just scaring us to stay because her sister doesn’t remember anything. And that if we ever get burned, we’ll lose our memory and ended up in strange places forgetting our families.”

“The sister part was most likely true. Though it was not an often occurrence, the last one we’ve known is of my late husband. He too was a child of La,” Amka says. “Washed ashore at ten years old with severe burns. He remembered nothing but he had traditional fire nation features. Pale skin, monolid shaped but blue eyes. Though not as bright as yours, and you still remember all of us,” Amka turns to Zuko.

Zuko, as if the information dump isn’t enough to make the world spin, his brain somehow can still reveal another memory to the already crowded thoughts.

“The-the burn,” Zuko breathed deeply, his hands shaking. “Was it on his hand? Bo-both his hands, down to the bone, right up to the elbow.”

For the first time since they met, Amka looks surprised, “Yes, it was so bad, we had to amputate his hands. How did you know?”

Zuko chokes, his chest tight, “My grandfather was the only heir to the throne, but that’s not always the case. He had a brother, wielder of white lightning, it’s as rare as wielding blue fire my sister has. It was complicated, my great grandfather had two wives. There’s a loophole in the rules. Technically both of them are first sons since they came from different mothers. If you’re not a firebender, you have no right to the throne. So Azulon burned both his brother’s hands to a crisp so he can never bend again in fear the throne will fall to his stronger younger brother. Which became true, he couldn’t bend and went missing, or some say he was banished. Or so the rumor of the palace, or I thought it was a rumor. The public was told that his own white lightning burned him and he died.”

Azula was the one that told him this story, telling him that she might have done that to Zuko because she wants the throne so bad or when Zuko pisses her off. Then she’d said ‘just kidding’.

There are whispers around him, and Amka seems surprised by the information just as the crowd does. Chief Arnook seems horrified, while Pakku is carefully stoic.

Before Zuko could spiral into the hate cycle in his family and his deteriorating self. Aang breaks the whispering.

“That wasn’t the full story,” Aang’s voice clear and steadfast. “My friend Kuzon told me a Fire Nation cautionary tale, that if you punish children with fire, they would be spirited away. Because there was a story of a Fire Lord a few generations before him that was cruel and overthrown because he burned his children and they all went missing. So, we asked Kuzon’s parents about it. They told me a Fire Nation folklore story that, Agni is a peaceful spirit that gifted mankind with fire to live and prosper. Agni couldn’t bear the sight of his gift being used for violence and cruelty, so he begs the ocean spirit to help his children. To put out the fire that harms them with her water. In a sign of pity, La agrees and took Agni’s children as hers, gifting them with water to heal the wound of the flesh and waterbending for the wound of the soul. The Fire Nation people that believe this story say that Agni had given the children mercy instead of calling them spirited away. But the Water Tribes and we air nomads call them children of La.”

Zuko gapes at the bumbling thirteen-year-old that speaks with sudden clarity. Aang is right, there was a similar Fire Nation cautionary tale. Though Zuko read in a very old children’s book, he doesn’t know this full story. So are the tribes it seems, who whisper and looks at the avatar in wonder and awe, while some are looking at Zuko with mixed emotions.

“A mercy and a gift,” he chuckled mirthlessly, broken with unshed tears, “So, I wasn’t damned?”

“No, Zuko,” Aang says weakly, “They are protecting you.”

“Speaking of damned!” Sokka squeaks, upset. “I don’t like these spirits flinging children around when they should’ve punished the ones doing the harming!”

Aang shrugs like it’s nothing, “The Spirits work in mysterious ways.”

And perhaps because it’s the third time he heard it, Zuko burst out into a laugh. Everyone froze at how loud Zuko is. The people here never had heard Zuko laugh, and only that one time with Yue he raised his voice. They began to worry when Zuko doesn’t stop laughing, even getting louder, and louder. Until it turned into sobs, then his voice becomes quieter and quieter, he balled smaller and smaller. At some point, he hears fading footsteps and a soft touch on his back.

When Zuko raises his head, he knows it’s Yue. Yue whose life was saved by the moon’s spirit Tui, and Zuko who’s saved by the spirit of the sea La. Suddenly every vague thing has an answer. The reason he’s drawn to her, the way he’ll always look up to her. Even the reason they’re engaged at all is answered.

“We have our reasons for being. Nothing is what it seems,” Zuko croaks, “What now?”

Yue smiles kindly, embracing him with her cold touch, only that her touch is no longer cold, not when Zuko is also cold. “Now, Zuko, we just live.”

Yue catches his tears and lets the rest falls on her shoulder.

An hour later, the three adults come back to Zuko’s head on Yue’s lap. Zuko has the consciousness enough to be embarrassed for being caught looking like a child especially being close to the Chief’s daughter in front of the man himself. But Yue doesn’t look embarrassed, in fact, she’s pointedly avoided her dad’s eyes with contempt. Zuko isn’t surprised, the last thing he sees before he fell was Yue screaming at her dad.

“Prince Zuko,” the Chief addresses, “Since you are a waterbender of our tribe, we would like to offer you education with our best.” The Chief gestured to Pakku, who oddly doesn’t look like he wants to kill him, nor in a general state of distaste. “Only if you wish for it of course.”

Zuko holds his breath before saying yes, he looks at Amka, “I would love to learn more about waterbending, but… I want to learn to heal.” The two men seem surprised except for the women. Zuko knows he’ll be breaking another stigma, but Katara had paved his way. Surely, it’s not so atrocious?

Chief Arnook sighed exasperatedly, “Yes, you can. If Amka agrees?”

Amka grunts, “Be here at six sharp.”

Zuko has a feeling that he won’t wake with the sun anymore, but there’s a fire in him that is lit with determination, sparked by a new hope, and burned with his hunger for knowledge.

“I’ll be there.”

Later on, trading cargos brought news that the Fire Nation had conquered Omashu. Thankfully, no one is blaming Zuko this time, nor flinging him from another cliff. A few Northern Water Tribe spies had come back from checking on the Southern Water Tribe by Zuko’s plea. His fear came true when they report that there’s no one on the Southpole, it seems that everyone there is taken away. What’s left of the tribe are burnt tents, ashes, and melted igloos. A sign of Azula’s wrath of her failure.

++++

“I don’t know why Katara doesn’t like healing waterbending. It’s so much more calming to learn it. It’s close to meditation, a lot of concentrating. I’m also surprisingly better at this than firebending. Amka has been giving me compliments!” Zuko says as he practiced little water spins in his hands. Zuko finds that this is the first time he’s ever this excited, also realized that maybe he’s a bit of a nerd.

“It’s not like Katara doesn’t like it. It’s because Pakku was talking shit and if anything, Katara runs on spite. She just has to put a jerk down to their place.” Sokka laid on snow, scratching his scalp.

“Also, are you sure that you’re learning with Amka? She’s notorious for making her students cry,” Yue gave him porridge with sliced meats from her picnic basket.

Zuko shrugs, freezing the water slowly so it creates a little snow rain. “She said it in her own way. She kept grunting instead of criticizing me, which is can be infuriating because how on Agni’s blasting sun am I gonna learn without input? So I noticed that her grunts and sighs are all different from one another-”

“Ugh, remind me to never be in a room with you and Katara. Both of you nerds are gonna do a nerd out until I’m drenched.”

Zuko narrows his eyes, “I don’t know how those two correlate.”

“Every time Katara waterbends near me, I got drenched! You saw it with your own eyes man!”

“Poor you, now come on, sit up and eat,” Yue says affectionately, and Sokka, completely infatuated with Yue, immediately sits up to a set picnic blanket.

Ever since the Avatar’s posse arrived, Zuko’s routine had changed as of this.

In the morning, he’ll wake up early. Still with the sun, as if it’s the only gesture from Agni that’ll never leave him. Then he’d go to the guest hut to wake Aang and Katara to serve breakfast. They would walk together until they have to split for their respective waterbending lessons. Then Zuko goes to class with Amka and a bunch of kids in training since Zuko had to learn the basics. At noon, Sokka and Yue would come over and they have lunch together, all three of them. Zuko refused at first since he doesn’t want to third-wheel the obvious couple.

“Dude, if anyone’s third-wheeling is me,” Sokka had said when Zuko confesses. “You’re literally her fiance.”

“I don’t know if that’s still going on, to be honest.”

Sokka had looked suspicious, “You aren’t jealous I’m stealing your girl?”

Zuko had laughed, “Yue isn’t mine to be stolen. I love her, but she’s her own person. If you make her happy then I’m not gonna stop her from being with you. I know that won't stop her from loving me too, so I’m not jealous.”

Sokka huffed, looking determined, “Then I’m not gonna be jealous too!”

Though the following days, Sokka had looked a tinge jealous whenever Yue gave him a shred of attention. Still, she’s only romantic with Sokka, and Zuko finds it charming that Sokka is so taken with her. Also, Zuko is starting to enjoy Sokka’s company as well. Sokka is funny, he spins stories to sound amusing and entertaining. He’d always put both Zuko and Yue doubled with laughter at the end of lunch. Since then, Zuko started to look forward to meeting with Sokka along with Yue. Zuko is not gonna read into it too much. He’s far away from home and here, no one can tell him who he can be and what he should do.

After lunch, he’d help the ladies of the tribe to prepare dinner. Zuko was never offered to work before, but after his gifted life from La, he’s ‘allowed’ to contribute to the people. Cooking is another women’s work stigma Zuko is breaking because Zuko isn’t good at hunting while Sokka and Aang is the one doing that. He’d make said dinner with Katara as his only non-awkward friend, and they’d -as Sokka put it- nerd out about their earlier learning session.

They’d eat dinner with all five of them in their circle on the floor by the dining hall. After that, it’s either a chill tea time, or snow fight, or spending time with the avatar’s pets, or trying games from their respective culture. Sometimes he swaps waterbending techniques with Katara, she taught him basic fighting stance, and he teaches her niche ways to heal. Every time Sokka is in proximity is always when Katara is coincidentally demonstrating showy moves, which always splattered towards Sokka. When it’s late, they go to their respective rooms. Zuko in the palace’s guest room. Yue in her chamber. The Avatar gang in their guest hut. Morning comes again, Zuko wakes up, and repeat.

If you ask Zuko that he’d have friends from three different nations back then, he’d scoff. Even after Aang, Sokka, and Katara arrived, Zuko felt like they won’t be friends, but after Zuko washed at the beach and had his breakdowns, they had come and apologized sincerely. They hadn’t believed in Zuko, but it’s hard not to after the day he fell. They said if they knew, they wouldn’t have declared it carelessly. Zuko finds it hard to be angry at them when they look so sad, so he accepts it, and the rest is history.

Zuko loves spending time with Yue, but amid this tribe, she was his only friend while the others avoided him like he doesn’t exist or with disinterest. The people treated him better a little now, but it matters less than his three additional friends. The last time he has these many friends he was a kid, and they were more of Azula’s friends. It’s nice to have friends of his own. It feels… fun. Not only that, Appa and Momo have taken a liking to him, and both of them are adorable. He never had pets before, but when Momo sleep on him or when Appa nudge at him for pets, his heart melted.

Though their routine hasn’t been all happy. Not when the news came that the people of the Southern Water Tribe is missing, taken away. Sokka and Katara are almost inconsolable, wanting to march down the Fire Nation and get their people back themselves. It had taken days to reason with them, that the best they could do now is to get stronger. Zuko ensured that his sister is petty, but not unreasonable. If they’re not benders then mostly they’re just captured to be forced to work. Which isn’t ideal, but it isn’t slaughter. They were hoping it was not slaughter.

Now, if only his uncle would reply to his letters, he would’ve made sure of it.

He’s been granted to send letters. He is finally able to write to auntie Iza, nothing incriminating like how he almost got murdered or that he’s a waterbender now, just saying that he’s fine. He sent another for his uncle to come back to the North pole quickly as there have been big changes that need his council.

Security is reading all his letters before he gets to send them. Zuko had alerted them about Azula, how she’d do anything other than bring dishonor home. That if Aang is here, she’ll track him down. No matter what, she will bring the avatar back.

“I don’t want Aang to get hurt, but I… kinda want to see how she’s doing,” Zuko says, face buried in Appa’s side, laying there with a lap full of Momo. “Azula is father’s favorite, he couldn’t be as harsh with her like with me, right?”

It’s a time between lunch and making dinner, just a few minutes after Sokka and Yue left to spend time together after their usual lunch. A few hours to himself and the gentle animals. It’s so peaceful that he almost dozed off.

Almost, until someone walks in.

“Hey! I’ve been looking for you everywhere!” Sokka says, seemingly relieved at finding him.

Zuko looks up from Appa’s fur, “What’s wrong?”

“Huh, no nothing’s wrong.”

Zuko blinks, seeing that there’s no one beside him, “Uh, where’s Yue?”

“Ugh!” Sokka plops beside him on Appas fur, the contact makes Appa groan. Sokka then pets him apologetically, “Sorry buddy. Yue is requested by her dad to ‘talk’.”

“Ah, I think it was about time. Why didn’t you wait on her? It couldn’t have taken more than a few minutes,” Zuko nods, sitting up, and leaning sideways on Appa to face Sokka as Momo is playing with Zuko’s vest.

“I hope not. I bet Yue is gonna give him a long, scalding, piece of her mind! And roast him like a rotisserie ox-chicken!”

Zuko chuckles at the image, “It’s her dad, Sokka. They’ll hug, forgive and move on.”

Sokka raised an eyebrow, “You know what it’s about, right?”

Zuko twirls Momo’s tail, “No, not really. I know she’s been giving her dad cold shoulder. She’s angry at him, but she hasn’t told me why.” Zuko looks at Sokka, “Do you know?”

Sokka splutters, “Well, no-not really I mean, not explicitly but- you know-”

Zuko laughs, airy and easy at Sokka’s antics. It’s endearing seeing Sokka cares, “I don’t mind if she tells you things she hasn’t told me, Sokka. It’s fine.”

Sokka looks flushed and awkwardly scratches his cheek, “Look dude, I wanna respect you here, but you not minding her telling me her secret first and us dating. Does… I don’t know…” Sokka looks nervous, giving Zuko hesitant looks.

“You can tell me,” Zuko says encouragingly, his heart questionably beating louder at Sokka is trusting him to open up.

“You said you love her, but your engagement with her… Does it even mean anything at all?” Sokka says solemnly, almost worried.

Zuko says truthfully, “No, it doesn’t.” Sokka looks shocked, but then Zuko continues, “This engagement is arranged, but if it were up to us, it didn’t matter whether we’re married or not. We’ll still love each other, and we’ll always be there for each other.”

Sokka watches on, there's no comical expression there, only a focused reverie.

“I really like her,” Sokka says, even though Zuko knows Sokka feels more than that. He understands that some people are afraid to admit something too intense.

“I know.”

“But I feel like she doesn’t need me if she has you,” Sokka looks at his feet sadly, “Both of you seem… complete. Fated. She’s blessed by Tui and you’re by La. Where do I fit in in her life?”

Zuko blinks, clearly surprised that the jokester Sokka has this kind of emotional depth that Zuko doesn’t have to be handling this with care. “Well, uh… It’s not about a need, is it?” Zuko started awkwardly. “I know we’re kind of fated, feel like it too, but we’re still our own people. Isn’t it even more special that even though we’re connected spiritually, she still chooses you?”

Sokka snaps his eyes at Zuko, “Huh? What do you mean?”

Zuko shrugs, “I know she’ll love you the moment both of you meet eyes. I don’t know, I can’t explain it, but I just knew.” Zuko watches as Sokka’s eyes grow big, pink on his cheeks. Zuko smiles, knowing he finally got through to Sokka. “And you’re good for her,” Zuko bumps shoulders with Sokka. “Our lives are stiff and intense, but you’re funny, considerate, and you’re one of the only people that treat her equally. She loosens up with you, it’s also easy to talk to you because you’re open and charming.”

“Yo-You really think so about me?” Sokka blushes, looking away.

Zuko chuckles at the endearing display, “I’m never much of a good liar, so I never tried.”

Sokka’s blushing madness drops into a frustrated sigh as he looks at Zuko, legs on his arms, “You know, she’s angry at her dad on your behalf.”

“What? Why would she?”

Sokka looks at him incredulously, “Seriously? Dude, he basically gaslight, gatekeep, mansplain everyone into deciding to sentence you to death. The whole tribe was unsure about you, but the chief was fanning some fires along with his crusty-ass elders. Then the whole tribe wanted you dead too.” Sokka looks at him grimly, “After you were swept away, Yue doesn’t speak, doesn’t even eat. She just sits at the edge of the beach and stares at the sea until you’re back. Thank spirits you came back twenty-four hours later. I wouldn’t know what would become of her if you don’t.” Sokka drops his gaze at his lap. “I wouldn’t know what I’d be. I was the one that blindly blamed you.”

Sensing Sokka’s distress, Momo bounced from Zuko’s side to Sokka’s.

Zuko lets the words sink in. Yue hadn’t told him about that, maybe she never talked about it and Sokka knows by witnessing it. This isn’t the first time Zuko experience someone is hurt because love runs deep. His mother leaving him assumingly for his own good had destroyed him. Yet, Zuko never thought that if he leaves it would leave such a dent. The people that cherish him though far apart, had always existed, and to think he almost died not ever feeling this compassion. Having friends, being free, learning what he wants, living longer with Yue. Zuko feels so grateful to live.

“Honestly, I don’t even want to think about that. I’m here now, and it’s all that matters,” Zuko mumbles.

“Hey,” Sokka put a firm hand on his shoulder. “I’m glad you’re alive, here, and seemingly doing pretty well for yourself.”

Zuko feels his eyes water, and nods, not trusting his voice. He’s pulled to a hug. Though it’s a surprise, it’s not unwelcome. Zuko hugs back, and Sokka holds him tighter. Sokka is way warmer than Yue, like his uncle and auntie Iza is warm. There’s something about Sokka that’s light, putting him at ease, and giving him a sense of carefreeness. Zuko now sees why Yue loves him so much. If there’s someone able to give him this much relief from obligations, Zuko would cling too.

That’s what Zuko does, clings even as Sokka lets go.

“Um, sorry,” Zuko lets go, face red in embarrassment.

“Hey, man, it’s cool,” though Sokka’s face doesn’t look ‘cool’ at all, he’s completely flushed. “You’ve been through hell man, I’m always down for a bro hug if you need it.” Sokka looks stifled saying it, but he sounds sincere.

Zuko smiles, “Thanks Sokka.”

Sokka pats his back, “Hey, you got time before you make dinner, don’t you?”

“I guess.”

“Wanna hang?”

Zuko blinks, “What does that mean?”

“Spirits, and I thought Yue was stiff. Come on.”

Turns out, ‘hang’ is just another word for spending time together, and Sokka has a very different interpretation of spending time. Usually, Zuko and Yue would spend time only with each other. They drink tea, sit by the beach, knit, make poems, read to each other and he teaches her how to play Pai sho. With Sokka, it’s more… loud.

Sokka is here way later than Zuko, but he had somehow befriended all of the northern tribesmen. He greets almost everyone along the way, while Zuko stays stiffly to his side. People had been making polite smiles at Zuko, not knowing how to act. Sokka found a gang full of children penguin sledding. The children don’t seem as stiff facing Zuko, so when Sokka said Zuko has to join or Sokka won’t push them, they accepted.

Zuko only had seen penguin sledding from afar, he had thought he’s too old for it. Sokka argues that no one is too old for anything. Penguin sledding turns out to be more fun than Zuko would like to admit. Whenever the children say ‘Again! Again!’ Zuko finds himself with the same sentiment.

Zuko’s adrenaline is cut short when a little girl tugs his sleeves mid climbing up the snowy hill. Her hair is done up intricately with colorful ornaments and flowers.

“I’ve seen you have long hair,” she states, blue eyes looking up at him firmly.

Zuko pauses, then pulls his hair from inside the parka as if checking, “Uh, yeah, I guess I do.”

“Can we do your hair? We ran out of heads.” Which is a terrifying thing a little girl could say. When Zuko looks behind her and sees girls in ranges of teens to children with done-up hair, he sighs in relief. The two teens look a bit stiff but try to be polite and say nothing. The children, which outnumbered the teens, looks excited.

“You can, if that’s okay,” he addresses the older girls.

One of the teens sighs defeatedly and smiles as she pats the space below her to sit.

There are five pairs of hands on his head, doing things to his hair that feel nefarious. One girl compliments that his hair is very soft and light. Another girl complains that his hair is too soft to stick up at the right place and too thin to do what they plan to do. Zuko tried to play nice and not wince when they pull too hard, or when something suspiciously cold touches his head. They’d also fight at what to do which to what part of his hair. It was chaotic, but it’s somehow amusing hearing them rant and be included in their conversation. They’d ask if it’s okay to do this and that which Zuko always says yes as long as they don’t cut his hair.

“Zuko! Where have you- PFFT!” Sokka muffles before doubling over with laughter.

Five heads turn and glare at the boy, which cuts his laughter short.

“How dare you mock our art!” scolds one of the little ones. “His hair looks beautiful!”

“Alright, alright! Sorry, put away those sharp things!” Sokka pointed at the end of a fishbone comb that the girl is holding.

“Can I look?” Zuko asks and handed a mirror.

Truth to be told, Zuko doesn’t look at himself as often lately. He’s still startled every time blue eyes glow at him whenever he looks at a mirror. Then he sees his hair. No wonder his head feels heavy, there are dozens of ornaments on his head. The front part of his hair has thick twin braids like Yue and is pulled back to a bun like Katara. The bun has to be made from fake hair because his hair still cascades down from the bun in wavy curls to his mid-back and clipped with colorful beads along the strands. On his head circled decorative strings that go around his temple. There are decorative clips everywhere but strategically placed. The girl was right, his hair looks beautiful, though it’s not a typical traditional hairstyle, it’s a twist of it.

“Sorry to cut your salon session short, girls!” Sokka cuts, “But Zuko has to make dinner!”

To his surprise, there are a series of collective groans from the girls.

“We’re gonna get a portrait of our hair!!” Says one of the teens, “We don’t want our hard work to go to waste without putting it to memory!”

“A portrait?”

The teen looks at him, bashful, “If that’s alright with you, Prince Zuko?” she says hesitantly.

Zuko splutters, “No no! That’s okay, and please, just Zuko.” He doesn’t feel too attached to his title anymore, and there’s something awkward about them calling him prince when the tribesmen previously never addresses him except for guards, the chief, and elders.

Five girls smile brightly. “Well, what are we waiting for!” Two teenage girls loop their hands on each of his arms and pull him up. “We have to go to Kallik’s place before he dozed off, it’s close to his nap time!”

“Hey hey! Amka will kick my ass if I didn’t bring Zuko on time,” Sokka stops, and Zuko would argue that his ass is the one getting kicked if he’s late.

“Just tell her that her sweet beautiful precious most favorite granddaughter Nulia is borrowing him for something more important!” the teen, or Nulia, says. Sokka is left behind spluttering, and Zuko sends him an apologetic smile, though not really. Zuko finds that he’s having fun with these girls.

The portrait maker is a middle-aged artist that draws family portraits and maps that fills the entire room. He gives one look at Zuko and sighs.

“I told you not to bother the prince, Isa, I don’t care how long and soft his hair looks,” he says to the young one, the one that was tugging his sleeves.

“Just Zuko is fine,” Zuko says as politely as he can, but Kallik only raised an eyebrow.

“As you know, I asked very nicely!” Isa rebukes passionately. “And he says he doesn’t mind, and that he likes his hair!”

The middle-aged man, Kallik, looks at him with tired eyes. “Fine, please sit over there, Prince Zuko.”

Before Zuko can correct him, five girls say in harmony, “It’s just Zuko!”

Zuko can’t help but giggle along with the girls.

They sit in many poses to make sure all angles of the hair are captured. Kallik works lightning fast. The portrait isn’t too detailed, but it’s enough strokes to capture the right one. Even from a ¾ from the back angle, it’s no mistake which one is Zuko and each of the girls. Being close with their newest guests, the teens are prying for information from him about the avatar and Sokka, or as one called it gossiping. While the smaller kids are only really interested in how the fire nation does their hair. Zuko has all of their answers, all of Zuko’s childhood friends are girls, after all. Zuko is fluent in the gossiping language, hair, and make-up, everything but fighting though.

At the end of the day, as they left for dinner together, Kallik stops him and hands him a portrait of him with the five girls. The portrait is drawn as if in a candid moment. He’s smiling and chatting with all the girls. He wonders if this is a portrait or fabrication, Zuko looks so happy, and the girls around him seem happy with him too.

Zuko thought it must be fabricated, but he remembers all the things this picture captured. Isa clinging to his arm, Nulia shoving his shoulder playfully, Uki whispering to him something scandalous about Sokka, Yura fixing up his hair or as she called it ‘her masterpiece’, and Nini that keeps telling him to stay still not to ruin his hair. Surrounded by them, Zuko’s smile seems to beam.

Zuko wonders when had he learned their names. They’ve only spent an afternoon together.

He holds the portrait dearly, smiling at the picture that captured all those fond moments.

“Thank you,” Zuko’s voice sounds water and he quickly cleared his throat. “Um, how much for it?”

“None of that.”

“Please, let me. I have to pay you for something this valuable.”

The man sighs, “It’s been a while since Isa smiles. I couldn’t do it. Just treat her nicely.” The man says awkwardly, a bit intimidating, but Zuko bows respectfully.

“I will. Thank you for this.”

Zuko thought they’ll be undoing his hair before dinner but no. They want to show the whole tribe of their masterpiece at the dining hall. Said tribe is entirely amused and sending Zuko apologetic looks.

“Men doing housework and adoring women’s hairstyle, while girls learning combat waterbending,” Complained an elder, “What has the world come to?” Yue and Katara glared his way and the elder have some sense to look intimidated and divert his eyes.

Yue and Katara who are entirely enamored are asking the girls how they do it. Aang wishes he has hair because it looks like fun. Sokka stays back and just watches. When Zuko meets his eyes, the boy looks away whistling, pretending he hadn’t looked at all. Zuko chuckles at his antics.

“What’s up with your boyfriend?” Zuko whispered to Yue, pointing at Sokka who kept stealing glances at him, while the others are too busy sharing hairstyles.

Yue hums, smirking mischievously, “Maybe he’s finding a particular someone breathtakingly beautiful.”

Zuko chuckles and rolls his eyes, “Both of you are so cheesy. Go to him, he must’ve missed you all afternoon and too polite to steal you from us.”

“Wait, I didn’t mean me-”

“For the love of Tui and La, I should’ve known,” Amka cuts in. “Nulia! What have you done to the prince?!”

Zuko doesn’t even try as five chorused voice says, “It’s just Zuko!”

The adults have some shade of horrified but Zuko and his friends laughed at it.

After dinner, the girls undo his hair and take back their ornaments. Isa hugs him as she said goodbye. They make promises that they’ll find Zuko if they have another style to try. Zuko wishes that it’ll be soon. Zuko and Yue follow their friends to the guest hut to spend time as usual. Zuko and Katara are listening to what Aang found interesting today, while Yue and Sokka go to their corner completely on their own bubble. Zuko smiles at them, he knew Sokka must’ve missed her a lot when she was talking with her dad.

Speaking of that.

As Zuko and Yue are on the way back to their building, he says, “I don’t blame your dad, you know. The safety of his tribe is his responsibility, he has to make tough calls, and I was a threat. He did it to protect you.”

Yue doesn’t react, seemingly not surprised, but terrifyingly bitter, “You sound just like him.”

Zuko bites his lip, “Do you think it’s wrong?”

“Depends on the circumstances. In yours, it was a grave mistake,” Yue says firmly. Eyes hard and unshaken. “There has to be a certain grace to handle a complication if we dare to call ourselves peaceful and call the other side cold-blooded ashmakers. It was pathetic, heartless, and foolish of him to corner a prince that couldn’t even fight back with dozens of elite waterbenders, to then condemn you to death without a respectable interim based on words of a couple of kids. Avatar or not, sister tribe or not, we are supposed to be smart and assess facts before acting harshly. Not to mention that they gaslight people to think that you on behalf of Fire Nation had wronged the tribe when the chief and the elders had openly lied and twisted their words to make you look bad. They maliciously intended to murder an innocent child in cold blood because of his rash decision, blinded by rage instead of thinking with the compassion and integrity this tribe claimed to have. I was there, trying to point it out to him, only to be brushed away as if my opinion didn’t matter.”

Chills run down his spine hearing Yue speak without wavering, without pausing, with the utmost integrity and perceptiveness. Zuko can see it so clearly, Chief Yue, a strong and just leader. Zuko feels a swell of pride watching her, and affection as she defends his life.

“You might forgive him, but I couldn’t, not as easy.” Yue continues, her voice is weaker, sadder. “Not when he had almost taken you from me so carelessly. He wasn’t even listening to me as I cried to him to just reconsider. I feel more like a doll than his daughter.”

“I’m sorry,” Zuko puts his hand on her shoulder. “I didn’t realize how much his action hurts you.”

A tear escapes her hardened expression, Zuko wipes it for her. “He had hurt me a lot of time in the name of protecting me, and I always forgive him right away. Not this time, he needs to earn my forgiveness this time.”

Zuko nods and pulls her into a hug. He feels for her. Zuko knows his family’s intention loud and clear even though it’s not a good intention. He couldn’t imagine how complicated she must’ve felt when his father’s good intention hurts her deeply.

The next day, Zuko finds Sokka with Yue for their usual lunch.

“Hey, thanks for yesterday,” Zuko says.

“Huh? For what?” Sokka says, mouth full of bread.

“For taking me to hang with you, I think it was one of the happiest moments of my life. I don’t think I would ever be that happy if it wasn’t for you, so thank you.”

Sokka choked until his face is red, almost puking. Yue sighs fondly as she pats Sokka’s back. Zuko honestly doesn’t know what’s so shocking about what he said, but he apologizes anyway.

+++++

The routine changes a bit after that. Sokka would spend the rest of the day after lunch with Zuko alone whenever Yue is requested by her father. She said he’s trying to mend their relationship, and Yue is giving him a chance.

It means less time with Appa and Momo but Zuko doesn’t feel that it’s too much of a loss. Sokka is adventurous. He takes Zuko places where he dares not trespass in all the weeks he lived here. He takes him to see wild animals, takes him to his favorite food stands that previously wouldn’t sell to Zuko, and meets up with the same kids. The usual gang of girls that do his hair would occasionally find him and experiment with his hair as Sokka just watches and comments, which resulted in Sokka getting a hairdo too.

Zuko is ecstatic about this change of routine. He’s happier, he meets more people, and is having fun doing childish things with no one telling him it’s unbecoming. He’s happy spending time with free-spirited Sokka, always cracking jokes that made Zuko lose his breath. He definitely sees why Yue is so taken with Sokka. Zuko hopes that somewhere in the future, Yue and Sokka get their happy ever after.

Then, it was just like any other day. A happy bright day. Zuko had his hair done by Nini and Nulia, while Isa, Uki, and Yura put beads on Sokka’s wolf tail. Now Sokka is taking him fishing. Zuko knows he’s staring as Sokka gesticulates theatrically about one of many stories that Aang almost got himself in a lot of trouble, and Katara’s attitude to always ready to get down just adds fuel to it and Sokka had to save the day again. Zuko knows it’s not 100% true, he had heard Katara’s side of this same story a few nights ago. But Sokka is retelling it in a better way and Zuko is absolutely charmed.

“What? What’s on my face?” Sokka rubs his face as he caught Zuko staring.

“Nothing, I was just thinking…”

“About?”

“Katara and Aang are improving fast, and as soon as Pakku has nothing to teach, you’ll have to leave and find another elemental bender, but… you’ll stay in contact with me, right? Us I mean, Yue and I, of course,” Zuko flushed. “Write to us? Only if you can…but, will you?”

Sokka seems to be as pink as he is, “Of course I will. I’ll offer you one better! After all this petty fighting stopped, I’ll visit, then we’ll go anywhere you want.”

Petty fighting sure is a way to describe global war, but Zuko laughs at it. And maybe it’s because he had been happy lately, so he dared to dream big. “I’d take you to a Fire Nation tour. After the ‘petty fighting’ stopped obviously.”

“You know what, for once, I’m looking forward to going to Fire Nation.”

Zuko smiles, “Me too.”

As if on cue to balance all the good things, the sky darkens. He hears the panic around him first, and the black snow second. They both know what it meant. Their smiles dropped, the light air gains tons of weight. Zuko and Sokka shares a look. Sokka looks more horrified than Zuko’s hopefulness. He thought it must be his uncle. Yue had said it also snowed black when Zuko arrived. But for Sokka, the day it rained black snow was the day his tribe was attacked.

They ran towards the walls and sees a whole fleet of Fire Nation battleships, proving Zuko horribly wrong.

++++

“Uncle can’t be behind this,” Zuko defended perhaps the thousandth time. “He was the most supportive of the peace effort!”

“He’s a general of many experiences, the only one who almost tore down the unbreakable wall of Ba Sing Se.” says one of the elders, “He could easily manipulate you.”

His head pulsed with pain. He has no way of ensuring that his uncle isn’t the type of person to do that when all these old people hear of him are war victories.

The war room is a flurry of loud voices ever since a hawk from the battleship sent them a note saying, ‘We demand you give us the Avatar. The Fire Lord demands his containment for the better future of the world. We will wait for your response until sunrise the next day. If by then we have not received a letter of agreement, we then will be forced to use offense. Signed, Princess Azula of the Fire Nation, Heir to the throne.’

It was a pretty damning sight at first. Azula is fourteen, everyone is underestimating her, except for Zuko.

Aang wants to offer himself and hopes that they could talk it out, which is immediately brushed away. Sokka had offered a sneak attack on the fleet, which isn’t that bad of a plan. Katara is set on full war, which isn’t surprising. What’s surprising is that no one questioned Zuko’s loyalty but Zuko himself. He knows he’s considered one of the tribe, but he’s also his nation’s prince. Zuko’s question was answered pretty quickly when he sees Aang. The war that his nation committed is wrong, so are the genocides and their brainwashing propaganda. Zuko is not fighting the Fire Nation, he’s defending his loved ones and stopping Fire Nation from causing more harm.

At night, they send a letter to Azula that they have no intention of giving Aang when the Fire Nation had been a betrayer to the world by not keeping their word of peace. Azula replied that the Fire Nation says nothing about promising peace and had only been dormant to prepare for ‘the world's enlightenment.’

When the plan is formed, everyone is happy with it except for Aang.

“This isn’t right guys,” Aang sullens. “Aren’t Fire Nations supposed to be threading peace? Maybe they want me to talk about how to achieve it.”

Katara puts on a consoling face and a patient caring voice he heard from auntie Iza, “Aang, if they had wanted peace, they wouldn't have used force. Remember when they attacked our tribe because you refuse to come?”

“Maybe it was my fault. Maybe they really needed me and I slacked off.”

“Buddy, Aang, my dude, they deadass took our whole tribe! Took over Omashu by force! That’s not peaceful behavior. Or did you miss ‘the world's enlightenment’ is an obvious sarcasm that actually means world freaking domination?”

“But... war is still wrong! People are going to die!”

“Sometimes it’s not in our hand whether there’s war or not,” Yue inputs, “We can’t control that the Fire Nation had chosen aggression over peace, and we have to defend ourselves.”

“Whatever happened to be the bigger person, huh? I’m supposed to be the Avatar! A peacemaker!”

“Aang,” Zuko says a little desperately, bowing down to meet Aang eye to eye while grabbing his shoulders. “You can’t fight hostility with mercy. Your mercy means nothing in the face of a power-hungry Fire Lord that attempts to exterminate all waterbenders in the south pole, that taken even powerless innocent. That has done this to his own son,” it was a low blow, but Zuko was desperate.

Aang’s eyes go wide, pooled with tears, “I wish I could go to the spirit world, maybe the previous avatars had answers for me.”

“The Spirit world?” Zuko asks, hoping Aang isn’t mentioning some kind of afterlife.

“Sometimes I go into an avatar state, and converse with the previous avatars for council.”

Yue hums, “I think it won’t do any harm to ask someone wiser like that.”

“The thing is, I can only go at random times. Sometimes if I meditate I could, but not all the time.”

Yue thinks again, “I think I know a place that could help.”

They arrived at an alcove called the Spirit Oasis where the entrance is through a small cave dead center of the Nothern Water Tribe yet very concealed. Zuko had never noticed the place. It’s warm in there, and greens grow. The water is fresh and not frozen. Yue says it’s the most spiritual place in the North pole. In the middle is a pond. Two koi fish swimming in a circle peacefully, almost seems like they’re dancing.

“Why do I feel like these fishes aren’t just any regular ol’ fish?” Sokka narrows his eyes at the black and white koi fishes.

“They’re not,” Yue chuckles in amusement, “Long ago, the spirit of the moon and the ocean manifest themselves as mortals to be able to live amongst humans. These two are them. The white koi with a black dot on its head is Tui, and the black koi with a white dot on its head is La.”

“They kinda resemble a Yin Yang,” Aang says.

“That’s right. The two of them are a true manifestation of balance. Tui pushes while La pulls, their dance causes the tides of the ocean, and that’s how the first waterbenders learned to waterbend.”

Aang sits by the lips of the pond, crossing his legs, “I think I can feel them. The spirits are stronger here.” He put his knuckles together, closing his eyes as he takes a few deep breaths. When he opens his eyes, it’s all white and glowing, as well as his arrow tattoos.

Zuko and Yue gasps, the siblings aren’t as surprised.

“It worked!” Sokka cheers. “Now we’ll just have to follow the plan.”

That plan is Sokka being a part of the sneak attack, Zuko with the healers on the field, ready to heal on sight fallen soldiers, and Katara defending Yue and Aang here while he’s catatonic. It’s not foolproof but it’s enough. There’s a reason why the Nothern Water Tribe is impenetrable to Fire Nation’s efforts. They have solid defenses and powerful benders. Yet there’s this dread looming over his soul that Zuko can’t shake. He looks back at Yue before he left, and finds her face expressing the same unease.

The smile on Yue’s face as she nods is grim, and Zuko’s smile is wry too. There’s nothing they could do about the vague dread in their soul, nothing but do what they can anyway despite feeling that everything is wrong.

Zuko can still feel the sun. As if Agni hadn’t left him yet just for this moment, to let him know when the war will begin. Zuko feels it in his heart first before the first light bathed the tribe and his skin. The next second, meteors of flying fire rock rained from the sky, and two of the battleships exploded.

Zuko believes he survived so far only by pure luck. It helps that when the Fire Nation army recognizes him, they froze a few precious seconds for Zuko to take action. The tribesmen are decimated. The healers had to resort to the offense as well as heal. Zuko had never felt more grateful for swapping techniques with Katara after dinner. Zuko isn’t as good at fighting, but good enough to fling a soldier before they shoot fires to take a waterbender to a safe corner and heal their burns. After that, they separate ways, fight, find another one like that, and repeat.

He doesn’t know how long he fought, but there have been fewer and fewer blue armors around. As when it felt hopeless, the sun sets. As if in a hurry, the moon appears. As if in their favor, the tide picks up, rocking the battleships from aiming their fire trebuchet accurately. The waterbenders are more powerful at night, fighting back thrice as strong. The healers focused on getting the wounded fighters back to their feet.

He's pulled to the side by another healer to drink something sweet to regain his strength.

“These are for fighters,” Zuko refused.

The woman insists, “We’re fighters too now. Half of us is down, you don’t need to add on the pile.”

“Where are they? Let’s help them.”

“No, there are people already on it. You stay on the field,” The woman looks at him with acknowledgment, “You’re better at this than the rest of us.” Then she’s gone, and Zuko takes the pride and goes back to the field.

Without noticing, Zuko is going further and further towards the edge of town. Feet wet from the melted walls and the tides coming into town. Instinct tells him to duck, and when he does, blue flame sliced over his head, singed the ends of his hair.

“Well, isn’t this a pleasant surprise,” Azula sings as she lands. “Good to know that these savages seemed to treat you well,” She eyes him top to bottom.

Then Zuko meets her eyes. She seems shocked that Zuko’s eyes are different from the fleeting stiffness in her hands.

“Oh Zuzu, you’re so useless. How could you let them do that to you?” Azula narrows her cold gold eyes.

Zuko however, hasn’t got the time to reel in the sense of dread of almost burning and the nostalgic smell of something burning. His sister is all grown up and deadly sneer, her fists aim at his face.

“Azula,” he breathed, “Why did father do this? Everything was so peaceful! He could’ve stopped the war, why did he change his mind?”

Azula barked a cruel laugh, “Poor Zuzu, seems like these savages had brainwashed you.” She narrows her eyes and smirk. “Don’t worry, father will explain everything as soon as you’re home.”

Zuko’s drumming heart stopped, “What?”

Azula put on a babying face, “I’m here to bring you home Zuko, father’s orders. Father will acknowledge your loyalty if you go back with me. Now, stop wasting time. We’ve got a destiny to manifest.”

It doesn’t make sense, his heart screamed. No matter how badly he wants to go home, to be acknowledged by his own father, and make home feel like home again, it doesn’t change the fact that it doesn’t make sense. It doesn’t feel right. That family at home hadn’t felt like family since mom left. Zuko will return as a pawn for war towards these peaceful people that just wanted to be left alone, nothing will change for Zuko, nor the world.

His mouth moved by his soul, “No. No more war. This stops now.” Zuko puts a fighting stance.

Azula scoffs, “Oh, Zuzu, not only are you stupid, but you’re also a betrayer and delusional. Have you forgotten that you’re no longer a firebender?” Azula looks amusedly at Zuko’s fighting stance. “I guess I’m taking you as a prisoner, don’t say I didn’t warn you. Take him.”

Two fire nation soldiers stepped from behind her with cuffs. Zuko moves his hands. By the power of the moon and sea, the walls of water he created are twice as big as his usual strength and the soldiers washed at sea. Azula watches with shock. She looks at him dead in the eyes that shine unnaturally bright blue.

“You’re right,” Zuko poses a fighting stance, water frozen to spikes on his sides, “I’m not a firebender anymore.”

She grits her teeth and attacks with a sweeping down kick.

It's been years since they sparred, and they’ve grown so much since then. Azula is getting way better, but Zuko has unpredictability on his side. Even with the full moon, Zuko’s water and ice attacks are always evaporated by Azula’s powerful blue fire, but not as fast enough. Some ice still hits her, and water lingers rather than faded away as soon as the fists are put down like fire. Zuko uses water to sweep her off stance, even though she always bounces back perfectly, it’s the only gap where Zuko can attack.

She’s still more powerful than him. Zuko’s skin is heated from near-brushes against her fire. The smell of singed hair and flesh makes his heart jack-rabbit and his composure shaken. Every time Zuko throws her off, she looks wilder, lashing out harsher, and Zuko would get burned. There are holes in his sleeves and black patches from burning, half of both his sleeves are burned, exposing his reddened forearms from fires that burned through his ice walls.

No one is particularly winning, and Zuko doesn’t know how much longer his body and sanity could fight. Then the outcome is chosen for him when the world goes completely red as if there is blood in his eyes. He checked his eyes, there are no blood, and when he’s going back to attack, the water doesn’t move. He couldn’t bend anymore, not just him, but all the waterbenders fighters.

For a moment, no one spoke, the fight paused as to take in the drastic change.

Azula’s laugh is the one that breaks the chilling silence into a shuddering cold of realization when she blasts a wall of blue fire along the whole border where the walls of the Nothern Water tribe used to be. The soldiers are in awe while the waterbenders watch in fear. And Zuko… Zuko panics when he realizes that the moon is blood red and the sea has no tides. The surface of the sea is completely still as an undisturbed bucket of water in an empty room. It feels disorientingly wrong.

“My soldiers!” Azula calls, “The time has come for us to reap our Nations' glory! Your fire is ever more powerful. Seize these savages, and kill everyone that dares to refuse the enlightenment of our great Fire Lord Ozai! For Agni!”

Zuko watches weak-kneed as black and red soldiers blast fires towards the cowering waterbenders. A pair of soldiers lock Zuko’s hand behind his back and lift him. He meets Azula’s eyes that look at him with self-satisfaction, and the next second, she’s gone. Swept by a flashing yellow light. She, along with the soldiers by Zuko’s sides, is thrown to the sea. The water surface flattens too fast as soon as they land for it to be natural.

Zuko tried to concentrate on that fast-moving light. It landed on the top of the capital building… and it roars. It’s a dragon made of yellow light, on its head is Aang in a meditative state. The soldiers go back fighting, but the dragon is too fast, breathing out larger fires, burning everything, seeing no friends nor foe. Zuko hears breaking water, seeing Azula swimming back with contempt on her face directed at Zuko.

He couldn’t fight, and he doesn’t know how to reach Aang because there’s no way the avatar doing this with sane consciousness. This is carnage, the boy that kept preaching about pacificism couldn’t be the same one breathing fires at the soldiers.

Dread roots in his heart when he realizes where Aang should’ve been.

“Yue,” Zuko breathed, and with hands still locked behind him, he ran towards the alcove.

From the absolute edge towards the center of the city, he almost doesn’t make it when soldiers were trying to stop him. The dragon helped him, strangely enough.

Stepping in, Zuko finds that inside the alcove still has color.

He runs in, glad that nothing is tinged in blood. Yet he’s frozen at what he had seen surrounding the pond. There’s pools of water everywhere and a similar scent of smoke as if there was a battle here. His friends don’t seem harmed nor in panic at the appearance of his uncle.

Iroh looks at him, and strangely, there’s no shock as they meet eyes, only relief.

“Zuko!” Uncle Iroh sighs in blood-rushing relief, he marches over to Zuko and holds him so tightly as if he’ll disappear.

Zuko had never felt relief until now. All the burdens, the uncertainty, the stress all melted within his arms. “Uncle, I’m so glad you’re here.”

They part with sad smiles and return to Zuko’s friends. Sokka, Katara, and Yue are circling two dead fishes by the grass.

Zuko’s nerves tensed again, “No… no, who did this?”

“Some punk-ass nobody named Zhao, Aang went batshit avatar state and dunk him out though,” Sokka goes behind him and snaps the chains with his machete. “You know him?”

“Only in passing,” Zuko mumbles, eyes not leaving the limp koi fishes. Tui has burn marks, but not La.

“Somebody needs to help Aang,” Zuko says as soon as he remembers. “Something is possessing him, there’s carnage outside! He’s burning down everything!”

“It is Agni,” his uncle says, solemnly. “When Zhao burned Tui in the water, La followed because Zhao led the water to boil her as well.”

“I could hear him, Agni,” Yue says, eyes haunted. “He says… It was a mistake to give fire to the mortals that don’t respect balance. Zhao had killed and angered the spirits, and Agni is punishing all of us.”

They all stiffen, horrified as a spirit could perhaps currently killing everyone right outside this oasis.

“What do we do now?” Katara mumbles, helplessly staring at her hands.

His uncle looks at Yue, and his eyes brighten. “You… you have the moon spirit in you.” Then slowly, with great anguish, his uncle looks at him with haunted eyes. “And you, Zuko, you have the ocean’s spirit in you.”

“That’s true. Tui gave me life, saved me.” Yue looks somber at the spirits’ mortal form, “Maybe we’re always meant to give it back.” Yue looks at Zuko with a knowing look, too sad for anything.

It takes an instant for Zuko to understand, and the devastation of the knowledge somehow doesn’t destroy him. His uncle already openly crying. Sokka is trying to stop Yue from doing this, while Katara froze in horror.

“Zuko!” Sokka’s voice breaks his reverie. “This is insane! Stop, please. We just got you back! I thought you’re your own person now, that it doesn’t matter how fated all this shit is. This isn’t fair!”

Zuko’s breath trembled, no it isn’t fair. He always knows that it isn’t. It only felt like yesterday he was living freely, more carefree, and beginning to feel happy. Felt like it was yesterday that he met Yue and all things dark is chased away with light. He felt like he only beginning to grow into himself, and Yue had finally got her bearings into becoming a great leader. They’ve only begun to dream and to feel that their dreams aren’t impossible. It’s too early for their lives to end when it feels like it had only just begun flourishing. And yet, Zuko is not surprised, neither does Yue.

“In the beginning, even as I stepped into the battleship on the way here, I felt that I’m coming to an end.” Zuko looks at his uncle who looks back knowingly. Zuko embraces him this time, hugging his uncle for what it felt like the first time in forever. “I love you, uncle, I’m sorry that I was so bad at showing it.”

His uncle sobbed at his shoulder, hugging him back as tight, “I know you do, I never doubted you.”

When they part, they both have mirroring streams of tears. He looks back and sees Yue cradling Sokka’s face, kissing him on the temple, and hugging Katara. Yue steps back with a heavy heart, and pooling tears mirror Zuko’s as they look at each other.

Zuko hugs both Sokka and Katara in each of his arms. The siblings stiffen at first but then hug him back tight.

“Thank you for being my friend,” Zuko says weakly. “I love you. Tell Aang, I love him too, he’ll be a great Avatar.”

“There has to be another way,” Sokka clings.

“Please, don’t go Zuko,” Katara sobs.

Zuko feels flattered that he’s precious enough for them that it’s hard to let go, but he prays that they will eventually. Zuko steps back and looks at Yue. “We have to do this.” Zuko gives the siblings’ hands one last squeeze before he lets go.

And there they are. Zuko sits across Yue on La’s side while Yue is looking at Tui’s charred white scales. The spirits sacrifice themselves to be mortals for the balance of the world and to be stabbed in the back by the people they’re doing it for. In a way, this is retribution. In another way, one would argue that this is an execution.

Zuko looks up to find Yue already looking at him with sad tearful eyes. They’ll be lying if they say they’re not afraid. They are. They’re leaving behind their life as they know it, leaving behind their loved ones to right the wrongs committed by people they have no control over. Yet, there’s one thing that consoles them.

“We’ll always be together,” Yue says wetly with a smile.

Tears rained from Zuko’s glowing blue eyes, it shines just a tint blue. “Yes, we will.” Zuko holds her outstretched hands, smiling back. “For all eternity.”

Yue nods, “For all eternity.”

They hover their hands over the koi fishes, giving back the gift of life that was bestowed upon them. Their hands glow, and the glow grows brighter until everything in their vision is white and their bodies light.

Suddenly they feel cold, their body light enough to sway but there’s a pull to move. When they open their eyes, they’ve hovered above the pond and their friends and family stare up at them. Their mortal bodies are in their loved ones’ hands. Yue’s mortal hair turned black, and Zuko’s mortal eyes turned back to gold. Under them are two koi fishes dancing in a circle.

Zuko and Yue hold hands and smile at their loved ones. Peaceful, happy, and content.

It wasn’t an execution. It wasn’t an end.

Zuko and Yue’s life had come to an end, but there’s so much more. Because even as it ends, this isn’t death, they are leaving no one behind.

“We will always be with you,” Yue and Zuko say in harmony.

Yue floats to the moon. Zuko holds her hand until she slips out of his grasps. He will always look up at her, now and forever. As Yue becomes the moon, Zuko sinks into the pond and becomes the ocean.

The world comes back into balance.

As it always meant to be.

Chapter Text

Zuko and Yue never let go of their eyes from their loved ones from the moment they became spirits, until the end.

Agni lets go of Aang when the moon and sea spirits are returned. The Fire Nation soldiers retreat with Iroh’s command and much to Azula’s dismay. The Nothern Water Tribe is left with a lot of damage but remained unconquered. Aang doesn’t fare better than Sokka and Katara when he found Zuko’s and Yue's mortal bodies in their arms. Worst is Iroh, knowing even if he brought Zuko’s body home, the Fire Lord won’t spare him in the royal cemetery to bury him. Instead, Zuko is buried next to Yue on the grounds of Nothern Water Tribe, which Zuko prefers.

Yue watches her people pick themselves up yet again. She was still a baby when a Fire Nation attack happened before this one, it was devastating to see the result of war. She shines brighter at night, to help put light when her people rebuild at their strongest time. She watches with awe and pride as her tribe rebuilds with a better structure. She watches her people mourn not only her, but also Zuko, as their saviors. She notices Zuko’s friends, five particular girls cry and leave a framed portrait of him and the five girls by their altar.

Zuko sails the rest of the retreating Fire Nation fleet with calm seas. The way uncle Iroh looks at the calm sea knowingly soothes Zuko, knowing that Iroh will acknowledge him in the ocean. The safe travels don’t last long, since Iroh returns to the sea with a very angry Azula. An angry Azula is a sad Azula. Fire Nation soldiers chase them with blasts of fire. Zuko builds up a storm to let Iroh and Azula travel away faster and send tides to the soldiers. They fight upon the sea, Azula lashing out in anger about her banishment, while Iroh tanks her attack and hugs her in the end.

Yue watches as her father deteriorates, completely distraught as his beloved daughter, the last of his family, had died. Yue would shine brighter every time his father looked up to the moon. At one day he was at his worst, Yue appears beside him, though faintly but undoubtedly. They meet eyes, Chief Arnook shaken to the core begs with apologies. Yue just smiles and caresses his father’s hand that leaves cold trails as she would before she’s a spirit. Chief Arnook then understood that his daughter had always been there. Yue watches as Sokka also looked to the moon, missing her, and finds his heart mending with a girl named Suki. Yue watches Sokka struggle with his worth and regains it with a blade master Piandao. She’ll shine brighter whenever he fights, or when he makes plans. Hoping to highlight Sokka’s strength when he had difficulty doing it himself.

Zuko watches auntie Iza hear the news of his passing the same day the rest of the fire nation did. She’s the only citizen to cry and mourn, and she floats a lantern towards the sea. Zuko takes it into his depths, letting it shine until the sun rises. Uncle Iroh takes Azula under his wing, and their travels across the sea are always easy and favorable while Azula is anything but. His uncle’s patience knows no bounds, and his affection triples because of his recent loss, he is not to lose another family of his. But the one that breaks her hard exterior is a crass and powerful little girl named Toph quickly with her brazen and forward attitude. He watches as Sokka confesses to the shoreline that he had loved Zuko too. Zuko replies by pushing a shell beside Sokka’s feet with his tide. Zuko had known, though only a small inkling.

Both of them watch Aang grow into himself. Aang visits them at times when he meditates into the spirit world for guidance. Zuko and Yue don’t miss a beat to tell him that they’re proud of Avatar Aang. Aang is in tears as he hugs them back, saying that he misses them, and everyone misses them.

“We know, we see everything,” Yue says.

“We have always been with you,” Zuko says.

They watch as Azula finally but not as easily realized that her father had manipulated her. Watches as she joins the Avatar to bring her father down in vengeance. Her integration with the avatar gang isn’t smooth, and it only happens because Toph even with her rough edges, acts as the perfect buffer. Eventually, she earns her place by telling Sokka and Katara where their people are held and helps the siblings break them out from multiple containment facilities. Nothing can be done about Suki’s village though, Azula makes an off-handed promise that after the war is over she’ll send some reparation efforts. Suki isn’t too happy with her attitude but decides that she’ll hold on to it. They watch Azula teaching Aang firebending, her epic frustration when her fire is weak, and her child-like amazement as they meet the dragons. They watch as Azula takes Katara to meet her mother’s killer, and watch as she spared him, watching how it changed Azula’s perspective on mercy.

They watch as the first attempt of attack at an eclipse they had failed. They watch and guard them as they retreat with a heavy heart. They watch as they pick themselves up, standing even stronger.

They watch as the war finally ends. Their loved ones find their happiness and peace. Iroh is crowned Fire Lord, with Azula as his heir. Aang and Katara finally got together. Sokka looks like he’s truly having fun and is in love with Suki. Azula and her friends, Mai, Tai Lee, and Toph, are in the midst of the peace festival, and even though slightly, Azula smiled, seemingly hiding the fact that she’s having fun.

“I’m so glad,” Yue says, watching them from the sky.

“As do I,” Zuko says, watching them from the shoreline.

They will always be watching them thrive and grow, loving them from afar. They watch as their loved ones always love them too, everlasting, until the last of their breath.