Chapter Text
Dan was right. They needed some couples counseling. Both of them wanted to stay together, to be an us , but the problem was that neither of them were very good at conflict resolution, which led to a lot of built up anger and frustration. Despite literally being in each other's head and connected, sometimes they could just not understand where their Other was coming from.
And while both of them were considered smart, they were also what was commonly referred to as “himbos”, an intelligence paradox if you will, which led to very unique arguments and conflicts that their counselor wasn't really expecting or used to.
Like the one they were currently having
“he keeps calling me a baby!! an infant! a weak spawnling! even though I'm much older than him!” Venom exclaimed, lashing his extended head around for emphasis
“babe-” Eddie raised his hand to pat Venoms extended tendrils to calm them down
“SEE?? HE KEEPS DOING IT” they looked expectantly at their therapist, like at any minute now Dave would scold Eddie for being a meanie and wrong
“It's a term of endearment! a pet name! I've told you this!” Eddie said, gesturing with his hands as if that would explain the whole thing.
“You said the same thing about calling me a ‘parasite’ and you know I don't like it! you don't hear me calling you bad names! and I'm not a pet!” Venom huffed out and looked away.
“Well the other day you called me, and I quote, “pancreas” and you know what? I find it weird” Eddie retorted
“Yes! It's one of my favorite snacks, and we’ve observed other couples call each other food all the time! like sugar, and honey, and pumpkin” they smugly retorted
“If I may” Dave began, lifting his hand to placate them. “It seems to me that you’re both simply lacking proper communication here, and it’s all just a big misunderstanding” He began
Eddie glanced at Venom with an ‘I told you so’ look. “On both sides” he continued. Venom stuck their tongue out at Eddie.
“To begin with, Venom, pet names can refer to both actual names for pets, but it's also a synonym for terms of endearment, commonly used between couples. The names babe, baby, and bae have been in use for a very long time between romantic partners. Now, do you feel like Eddie treats you like a pet when he calls you that?” he asked in his calm and professional voice
“No. We are partners, I am his Other, and he is mine” Venom said with a dreamy sigh, and nuzzled into Eddie's cheek, who happily gave him a kiss between his eyes and rubbed the extended head that had been wrapped around his shoulder. “But we still don't like being called a baby” they grumbled
“Now here's the important part. Eddie, Venom does not like being called that, and correct me if I'm wrong, but Venom, you are open to other terms of endearments, correct?”
“Yes. We love being called his Other, and love, dear, darling” Venom exclaimed, happily wrapping more tendrils around Eddie with each name.
He nodded along with a smile. It was great seeing the issue get resolved so quickly without any arguing.
“I’m sorry love. It's just that… My previous partners liked it, so I guess I just figured you would like it once you understood pet names. I should’ve listened to you the first time. Forgive me?” Eddie looked directly at Venoms opalescent eyes, waiting for a response
“We’ve already forgiven you. Love you too much to be angry” They said, voice a bit muffled from being held by his Others arms
“Great work guys, I'm proud that you resolved it together without major prompting this time. You’re both making great progress” Dave said with a smile. “Now to our next obstacle. Eddie, you said Venom called you “pancreas' ' and you found it weird, and I presume that means you didn't like it. But I think you both can solve this one together without my input this time” He leaned back on his chair and gave them a nod to start
“Venom… I’m just going to be direct” he turned fully to face venom and braced himself to get it all out at once “I found it weird when you called me pancreas, or the time you called me lungs, thyroid, and the other times you’ve called me names based on organs and body parts”
“mmmhm. I saw on some of the shows we’ve watched, like Acorrolada. The couples sometimes call each other mi corazón, my heart, wanted that for you, love how your kidneys filter toxins, the rhythm of your beating heart, the enzymes your pancreas makes when we eat” he felt venom curl and embrace each of the parts he named, a familiar and comforting pressure inside his body. Small sensations akin to lingering kisses flitted through each organ.
“Oh wow… When you put it like that, I guess I get it? I understand more where you’re coming from now, but I think… I think I’m still going to feel weird if you call me any organ”
“Well I haven't cycled through every name yet, maybe I should try asshole next” They replied in a cheeky manner
Eddie feigned offense and gasped dramatically “dick”
“pussy”
They laughed at their teasing insults, knowing that their Other meant nothing by it.
their playful bickering was interrupted by a happy jingle playing from their therapist's phone, indicating that it was time to wrap it up.
“Well!” Dave began, clapping his hands together and leaning forward a bit. “I’d say we’ve made great progress. I’ve seen you’ve both had an easier time resolving issues, and it's clear that both of you want to work together, great seeing that! So, Venom, have you ever read poetry? I believe you want to express your love verbally for Eddie, and he likes to hear it, but you can not find the right way to do it without Eddie finding it a bit weird. I believe that if you read up on love based poems, you’ll find what you’re looking for”
“Thank you, we’ve heard of it but haven't taken a deep look at it. We will master the art of poetry and serenade our love” they looked intently at Eddie as they said it
“sounds like a great plan. So, before you leave, I'd like to give you a bit of homework. I want you both to just try out new pet names for each other. There are no limits, the most outlandish of names can have a lot of meaning to the person it's meant for, and all names don't need to be exclusively love filled. You can have names for when you want to be silly, or simply messing around, and you also don't need to have names for every thing, but you can have fun trying it out. Now don’t forget to communicate with each other about how you feel about it” He nodded to signify the session was over, and stood up, stretching his legs.
“Right. Thank you so much for your help, we really appreciate it” Eddie stood up and struck his hand out to shake Dave's hand, inky tendrils encasing his hand as he reached for their therapist.
“Of course. I believe we are reaching an end to these sessions too, you’ve both been working so well together, I'm impressed” Venoms smaller tendrils patted Dave's hand as the obligatory hand shaking ceremony proceeded.
“Thank you” Venom said, and went fully back inside of Eddie
“Well, that's my cue to leave. Thanks again and goodbye” He waved and headed out the door, one last tendril of venom coming out of his back to wave him goodbye as they closed the door behind them
“Man… how did I end up in this situation” Dave wondered aloud