Chapter Text
The music begins, blaring mercilessly through the speakers to the wild approval of the crowd. Fog spreads across the stage and lights gleam on cue to the beat. A boy clenches his hand slowly over the mic, and his eyes are as wild as the beating of his heart, every note sinking into his pores and flooding him with adrenalin.
On stage, a woman’s high heel boots click as she makes her way to the center, fashioned cloak floating behind her. The audience cheers through fits of screams, while the boy buries his chin against his chest in a bitter smile.
He knows those screams are for him.
His head snaps up and he pulls the mic towards him. The lyrics pour out of his lips as he closes his eyes and loses himself. In that moment there is no Machi, dancing robotically to a planned choreography; no curtain before him, hiding him from sight: there is only him and his music. Killua lets his tension be released- slashing his arm through the air, whipping his hair and feeling the blood sloshing in his head. These were the moments he felt truly alive.
“Now, here, what should I do?” He stops moving, lowering his head and deepening his voice. “You know, I don’t know. I don't have any answers.” Hands grip at his hair as he pulls his head back. His body trembles, while Machi gives a little spin that would seem out of place in the song if anyone truly paid attention. Killua reached the chorus and his strength and passion escalated.
“I can't help it! Yes, there is nothing! I understand that! Saying again with that resigned smile 'so bad'. Always, forever, it will keep haunting me. The 'me' of the past is still here?" He’s reached the point where he is a maniac mess, signaling the concert’s climax, even though Machi is as calm as ever. “Tell me!”
By now he’s toppled a few boxes over and his hair is standing everywhere and he's breathing hard as if he had just run miles and miles uphill but his eyes are wide and bright and his arms are raised as he receives the roaring applauses, facing only that dark burgundy curtain.
Killua walks out through the backstage door into the parking lot, hands buried in his pockets, hoodie dipped over his face. It does nothing to hide the darkness in his stormy eyes, which make a few people shudder as he passes by.
‘A good day’s work.’
That’s what his manager had said easily to him after the concert. Killua cursed and forced himself to keep control.
“A day’s work? A day’s work?! This isn’t just some game! Some girl going around playing idol.” The boy thought with hatred burning at the terrible hole in his chest. “This is the selling of my soul.”
In a blind fit of anger, he made his way to the nearest bar, finding the counter and barking an order for anything strong.
“Aren’t we too young for these sorts?” The tender began, but the hatred in those eyes was no childish matter and he handed over the drink with no further comment.
Yes, he was only 16, but this had been going on way before anyway.
Killua cursed again, refusing to think of the past and instead drowning his emotions in liquor. To his great fortune, it was karaoke night at the bar. The boy let his hood fall and he grinned with almost a hint of humor, raising his arm tipsily for the first turn. With one last shot, he stumbled to the stage and felt eyes on him.
“Hey, kid!” The organizer yelled. “What song?”
The boy repeated the name of his hit song, the same he had sang for a sold out concert moments ago.
“Machi, huh? Good luck.”
The music began, and the boy’s shoulders shook with laughter.
Yes... He thought with irony. This is how it began, wasn’t it? He grinned in his drunken state. How he found me. He took a step forward.
A voice flew through the speakers- potent and somehow completely steady despite the drinks. Everyone perked up suddenly, eyes widening as the air instantly changed. A few people took out their phones.
Yes, he remembered it perfectly. It had been at a bar just like this. Killua had gotten a little excited with the drinking, being his first time and all, and he had let himself go crazy on the kareokee. The audience had gone wild, and he had thought nothing of it but of how fun it had been… until someone searched him out that night.
‘You’ve got power, kid.’ The dark suited man had stated with security. ‘You’re going to go far'. At that time he had believed him, heck for a ridiculously pathetic moment he truly thought that man would make him a star.
He gave a violent jump to the beat of the song, making everyone hold their breath for a second before the chorus continued. Everyone was cheering and the atmosphere was almost the same it had been at the concert before. Killua let himself go, running around and basking in the sensation of finally being in the spotlight.
He flashed a look at a phone and grinned wickedly at the knowledge that Chrollo would be upset because of this. Stay out of sight… keep your voice hidden…
“Now, here, what should I do?”
Yes… what should he do…
“You know, I don’t know. I don’t have any answers.”
He didn’t want to be in the shadows anymore.
“I can't help it! Yes, there is nothing! I understand that!" His shoulders shook with a giggle. “Saying with that same resigned smile ‘so bad’.”
There wasn’t a way out of this, was there? No… these were the only moments where he could truly be himself…
He gasped for air before diving into the chorus once again, not a single person in the room looking anywhere but at him. He let the buzzing caused by the alcohol and the music to take over his mind...
“Thank you so much again, Kurapika!” Gon said gratefully as he took off his backpack and pushed it over the counter to take it home later. The slightly older boy across the bar smiled kindly with a shake of his head.
“You’re aunt has always been so good to me, It’s really no trouble at all.” Gon pouted childishly in reply.
“If only I could work here then we wouldn’t have to bother you!”
“It’s bad enough you come here so often, Gon. You do realize you shouldn’t be in these places at all at your age?” The blonde joked as he finished whipping a glass clean. Gon spun in his chair, pout replaced with a bright look.
“I don’t know why! Mito-san’s bar is such a nice place! People sing here and dance here and they always look so happy!”
That’s cause they’re drunk. Kurapika sighed in amused defeat. Even at 16, Gon was still the most innocent and optimistic person he knew.
“Well, you should probably leave soon anyway.” The blonde insisted, putting down the last glass and leaning against the counter. “You must have homework and things to study.”
“Aw, Kurapika! I want to be with you here!” The blonde raised a finger in parental-like scorn, but a grin remained on his face.
“No buts! You need to go upstairs and work.”
Gon groaned and was about to slip off his chair when Kurapika’s eyes gleamed.
“Oh, won’t you look at that.” He said suddenly, crossing his arms. “Your schoolbag is over the bar, and the rules say no one under 21 can take anything from here.” Gon’s eyes widened in excitement. Kurapika gave a fake shrug. “Looks like there’s nothing we can do until it’s my break in an hour, and I come out and give it to you.” Gon gave a happy cheer.
“Thank you, Kurapika!”
“You’re too easy on him.” A voice said behind Gon, making the boy turn happily towards it.
“Leorio!” He cheered, disregarding that comment completely.
“Don’t you, ‘Leorio’ me!” The tall brunette said with an obviously fake scowl. “Your innocent act wont work! You already got my boyfriend stuck in a bar for the rest of the day.”
Kurapika leaned forward and met Leorio in a quick kiss. The blonde went back to organizing the clean glasses. There was the sound of a chair nearby being moved and a person walking away. Leorio gave a snicker under his breath which did not go unnoticed by either boy.
“What’s so funny?” Kurapika raised an eyebrow. Leorio smirked.
“That guy had been watching you for a while now. He looked preee-tty disappointed when I came over and kissed you.” He said with a hint of pride. The blonde rolled his eyes and went towards a patron who was ordering a drink.
Gon smiled before turning to the stage, where the karaoke night was about to begin. He really enjoyed watching people preform (he never judged anyone’s talent, only the effort they put into it) and mentally thanked Kurapika once again for letting him stay.
“Evening, everyone!” a man called out through the mic. “It's KARAOKE NIGHT! Who's up first?”
A hand was raised a few seats away from where Gon was on the counter. The boy looked over the other people, and his eyes widened as he spotted that particular person.
“Huh.” He mused. “He looks almost as old as me.”
“That’s true, what the hell’s he doing here.” He heard Leorio’s voice behind him, but Gon couldn’t take his eyes off this new person. He was suddenly terribly interested. The boy walked slightly tipsily up the stage, and Gon realized he had been drinking.
“Good thing Kurapika didn’t tend to him.” He murmured, and Leorio chuckled at the thought. Yes, the blonde would definitely be angry at whoever sold alcohol to a minor.
“Let’s just enjoy the show for now, it’s bound to get interesting.” The older brunette took out his phone with a grin. “And by interesting I mean internet-worthy embarrassing.”
For some reason, Gon didn’t think that was what was going to happen. His eyes followed the boy up the stage where he was asked the song he’d choose. He replied easily, a strange looking smile on his face.
The music began and no one was really paying attention except for Gon (and Leorio), but that all changed at the first phrase. Immediately, Gon felt a chill run through him, his eyes widening in awe. Leorio’s jaw had dropped as he looked away from his phone and directly at the boy on the stage.
Gon couldn’t blink, couldn’t breath, as he held onto his every word. They were all dripping with feelings, hard and bitter and biting, but with such depth that he felt immediately drawn to them. The boy moved and danced with a hint of desperation, but it just somehow enhanced all the emotions. His voice rose and curled and pitched at all the right moments with undoubtable skill, and everyone was cheering and standing, feeling overly adrenalized.
The chorus passed, and the boy paused his wild movements, eyes looking down.
“There is no doubt, there is no tomorrow, yesterday or now."
Gon didn't understand what he was experiencing, but his heart was raising and clenching at those words, somehow knowing without a doubt that they meant something terribly deep to this person.
“All the days spent alone, every day spent alone.” The white haired boy’s head rose, and he was smiling despite his words.
Gon knew in that moment that he needed to reach out to him.
The boy returned to his frenzy, the audience going wild. Gon suddenly registered the fact that Leorio was yelling behind him but he could barely hear him from all the noise.
"HE SOUNDS JUST LIKE IT. HE SOUNDS EXACTLY LIKE MACHI. “ Gon had never heard a Machi song before, but he had heard the name being mentioned a lot lately. That didn’t really matter to him as much as the simple quality the boy’s performance.
There’s no way that Machi sings it like him…
This continued- the electrified atmosphere, the inability to look away -until the song came to an end, the boy slowly stopping his movement and lulling lightly back and forth on the spot. Everyone roared and clapped, many speaking to each other rapidly and nodding as if agreeing profoundly on something. Gon didn’t think any of it as he saw the boy lose whatever strength had been keeping him upright during his crazy concert as his knees buckled while taking a step off the stage.
Gon hadn’t even thought of moving when he was already at the boy’s side, clutching at him and setting a limp arm over his shoulders.
“Can you stand?” Gon asked as he carried most of the boy’s weight while trying not to fall down the few steps. The boy giggled.
“Yeah, yeah.” He moved a leg forward and seemed to be able to push himself upright a bit. Gon helped him down the steps and pushed his way through the crowd. “The bar’s good.” He said as they walked past it. Gon frowned.
“You’ll want to drink more, right?”
“Well, duh. It’s why people go to bars!”
“People could just go to have fun…” That made the boy blink in surprise for a moment, before moving his head and trying to get a look at who he was talking to. “A-and anyway, you shouldn’t drink anymore!”
The boy frowned for a moment in what seemed like confusion.
“How old are you?”
“What? How old are you!”
“I asked you first.” The boy seemed to find this funny suddenly, smirking while burying his face against Gon’s neck.
“Fine! 16.”
“Me too.” Huh, Gon hadn’t expected to actually be the same age.
The boy seemed oddly comfortable against his side now and seemed almost like he was falling asleep. That song must have really tired him. Gon jumped in surprise when he suddenly pulled away and started walking towards the bar.
“S-stop it!” Gon caught him again, and the boy whined.
“You stop it!” The spiky brunette pulled him back a bit, and that was almost enough for him to lose his balance.
“How were you dancing so much a second ago!” Gon asked with slight awe. The boy looked him in the eye with a grin.
“I’m a professional.” Somehow, Gon believed him. He wanted to know more, to spend time with this person and talk to them (honestly even in this inhibited state he liked the boy already) but he knew it would be best to call it a day.
“H-hey, I think you need to sleep.” The boy leaned against Gon again, letting his head fall against his shoulder this time.
“Sleep… yeah, that might not be so bad…” He murmured against the fabric of Gon’s shirt.
Gon looked up towards the bar and quickly caught Kurapika’s eye, who was clearly making a ‘who is he?!’ sign, which Gon responded with a quick ‘come!’ motion.
Kurapika cursed before going around the bar and running, with Leorio at his heels.
“Help me take him upstairs.” Gon said to the blonde, who nodded before taking the boy’s other arm and setting it around his shoulders.
“Wha-“ Killua pulled back slightly and Kurapika got a look at his flushed face. “Where are we going?” The blonde scowled suddenly, turning towards the bar.
“Who gave alcohol to this boy?!” He glared accusingly at the other 2 tenders, who avoided his intimidating gaze. Leorio patted him on the shoulder and Kurapika sighed in frustration. “The keys are in my pocket, can you get them?” He did and the blonde noded. “Open the door for us, will you?” They began to move towards the back door.
“I live here, upstairs.” Gon explained with a hint of worry to the almost all but gone boy. “My aunt owns the place.” He laughed tipsily in response.
“Living at a bar! That would be so fun. Fun fun all the time…” Gon couldn’t help giggle a little. Then the boy looked up and made eye contact. “I’m Killua.”
“I’m Gon.” He said with a smile.
“Yes, that door, please.” Kurpakia struggled to lead the two boys over the long set of stairs and through the hall to Gon’s room. Leorio opened the corresponding door, and the blonde practically threw Killua onto the bed, Gon falling on with him. The white hair boy laughed as they bounced lightly. Kurapika pressed his finger tips against his temples in frustration.
“I need to go back downstairs but I’ll check on you later.” Gon barely heard him as he felt Killua move and throw an arm over his chest. The two 21 year olds exited the room, with whispers of ‘you’re such a mother’ and ‘shut up’.
Killua’s breaths were already growing steady as he mindlessly clung to the boy under him. His nose was pressing against Gon’s cheek, and the brunette felt a nice warmth rush to them.
“Gnight, Gon.” Killua said almost happily. Gon’s question of whether he should leave or not vanished as he smiled almost giddily.
Kurapika would be coming later, and he’d be angry that he hadn't done any of his school work all day, but he would definitely not break the peaceful scene that had formed after so much madness.
“Good night, Killua.” He whispered back, letting his eyes slip closed.