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Aether has collected a few starconches in his ventures around Liyue - though having little use for them, he handed them over to a certain fatui harbinger in exchange for some much needed mora.
He is vaguely aware of the legend; that if you hold a conch shell to your ear, you’ll hear the secrets of another whispering back. In his own experience, all he ever heard was the eerie whistle of the fierce ocean breeze, when a shell had a crack somewhere in its curls.
Xiao’s letter described much the same experience, and Aether could almost hear the disappointment in his monotone voice from the penned words. He smiled at the thought of Xiao caving to his own curiosity, holding a starconch to his own ear. It was moments like that Aether wished he could capture in a bottle; where the aloof and burdened adeptus lowered his guard, when his shoulders relaxed ever so slightly, as he allowed himself to interact with the world around him. To give in to even his smallest desires.
While lazing in his waverider as it slowly drifted towards Liyuen shores, and having nothing better to do, he decided to listen to the conches Xiao gifted him. Who knows, maybe adeptal magic would transform the colourful shells into vessels for a voice.
The conches Xiao had picked out were all fairly aesthetically pleasing, except each bore a distinctive defect. The first one Aether held in his hands was vibrant in colour, yet greatly deformed - as if a mitachurl had sat on it and squashed its perfect curve into an awkward, crooked one. Upon closer inspection, though, it’s deformation makes the star centred in the spiral more prominent, as if nothing else matters.
Aether smiled, a memory of stargazing at Wangshu inn filling his mind. Xiao had asked what he was doing, and he simply replied,
“Every star has its own story, you know?”
Perhaps Xiao had thought of that moment too, when he selected this shell to give to Aether. Or, he thought with a giddy smile, stars simply remind Xiao of him. He is, after all, a traveller of the celestial sea, who arrived in Teyvat as a shooting star.
Aether traced the star on the conch with his fingers, before finally holding it to his ear. It whispered back in indistinguishable murmurs, words sounding familiar yet foreign at the same time. Then, the soft buzzing of crickets, and the rolling of a frog’s call. A gentle coo from a bird Aether knows only appears after dark. He smiled once again; these were the sounds of the night, when the stars shine brightest.
The other shells held similar unique flaws, containing the ambiance of the world Xiao had shown them. One with a large crack, as though it had been crudely cut like a cake, carried the sounds of a kitchen, and the murmur of the chef - likely Yanxiao - as they worked. Another with a large white spot contained the bitter, whistling winds of dragonspine; a second with darkness swirling into its patterns captured the eerie yet somber sounds Aether remembered hearing in the Chasm.
The last shell was the most ordinary of the bunch; a chip at its opening and somewhere along its curve, colours unevenly scattered across its surface, and a spiral slightly skewed. Yet, when Aether put it to his ear, he knew it would be the one he treasured the most.
Captured in its ordinary walls was the sound of a flute, clearly handmade with notes not quite in tune, playing a melancholic yet nostalgic melody. The piece was short, and only repeated twice before the flutist had stopped. And Aether knew exactly who that was, and his heart warmed knowing he had been trusted enough not just to hear it, but to receive a gift that had recorded the performance.
A part of him had hoped to hear Xiao’s voice in the conches, but these snippets of things he wanted to show Aether almost felt more intimate; as if he was sharing his time with the adeptus caught up in endless duties.
He listened to each of the conches twice more - and the one containing Xiao’s performance more than he could count - before he finally landed on the shores of Guyun Stone Forest. Initially, he was going to land closer to Liyue Harbour, though knowing Xiao had collected his conches at the stone forest, Aether just had to make a detour.
His plan was only to return a starconch, or five, containing his own message for Xiao to listen to at his leisure. Something along the lines of, ‘happy birthday Xiao~ I loved your starconches, but you have to stop giving gifts on your own birthday! I’ll make some almond tofu for you later, I hope we can sit together while you eat it’
Or… something considerably less cheesy. He smacked his cheeks lightly as he felt them heating up, instead focusing on the task at hand. Of course, if he wanted to leave a message in a starconch, he had to find a starconch first. He doubted he could find any with such beauty in their flaws as Xiao had, but there was no harm in trying.
Just as he started his search for the perfect conch, his eyes landed on one hidden in the grass. How strange, he idly thought, it washed up so far away from the water. He delicately picked it up, inspecting it closely. It was… fairly ordinary, its only notable feature being a crack that ran a few inches down the spiral. Absent-mindedly, he held it up to his ear - he was already holding it so close to his face, it felt natural to do so. Though where he expected silence, a gasp was drawn from his lips when he instead heard a familiar voice.
“Tch… none of these shells are good enough…”
He almost dropped it after hearing Xiao’s voice right in his ear, instinctively clutching it tighter to prevent said outcome. Fearing he had started hallucinating after thinking about the adeptus for so long, he held the shell to his other ear, and sure enough, it repeated the same message.
Did Xiao… leave messages while he searched for the starconches?
Aether carefully stored the shell in his bottomless inventory, before moving to the next shell he found. However, raising this one to his ear reaped no reward, as it merely echoed the same sea breeze that ruffled his hair. Disappointed, he set it back on the sandy beach, before moving to the next. But the next few conches were filled with the same windy silence, and Aether sighed heavier with each one he put back down.
Questioning his sanity for the second time, he held the first shell to his ear, but once again, it still spoke the same words. As though it was teasing him with the husky tones of Xiao’s voice, like a dog owner dangling a treat just out of reach. He sighed, pocketing the starconch once more, before it struck him - the ones he had been trying were all barely a foot from the water, but the first one had been almost unfathomably far from the shoreline. He mentally slapped himself before resuming his search, this time focusing on the conches in less natural places.
His suspicions were confirmed when he found one atop a small boulder and listened to it, and deep tones echoed back, sending shivers down his spine.
“Maybe I am approaching this wrong… hm…”
Simultaneously flustered and giddy at once again hearing Xiao speak in his ear, he scoured almost the entirety of Guyun Stone Forest for oddly placed shells, flushing after hearing each message. Incidentally, they strung together a short story of how Xiao’s birthday gift came to be.
“‘True beauty is found in one’s flaws, not one’s perfections’” said a conch laying with a discarded adventurers camp. If Aether had to guess, Xiao was quoting another.
“It seems these shells are bleached from the sunlight” said one conch in a pile of voiceless others - which were indeed far lighter than regular starconches.
“I- ah, I didn’t realise they- uh-” a conch cut itself off. Aether chuckled hearing him fluster, perhaps he had been caught off guard that the shells were actually recording him.
“Whatever, if I hide them, no one will hear of my foolishness.” A conch said, which Aether found rather ironic - it was their odd placements which led him to find them.
“Should I… use them to record things I like? No, that’s…”
“What does he like… ah, I forgot about- how… how indignant” a pair of conches said, bringing a warm smile to Aether’s face.
I’d like anything you give me, Aether replies quietly. He holds the last shell close, treasuring the mere fact that Xiao was trying. The adeptus had come a long way since their first begrudging meeting, so long ago now.
Half a dozen shells later, Aether collapsed by the domain, laying his finds before him. Perhaps Xiao would berate him for collecting them, but he just found them so endearing, it was hard to leave them be. It was rare enough when he could hear the busy adeptus talk, rarer still that he could listen to Xiao speak his mind, completely unfiltered. Besides, he was most likely doing Xiao a favour. He couldn’t imagine how embarrassed Xiao would be if Zhongli found such shells, or even worse, Tartaglia. The latter was more likely to come across them, too, and Aether shuddered at the thought alone. Truly, he was saving Xiao from the worst.
He listened to each of their messages once more before storing them away indefinitely, most likely to resurface when Aether was by himself, missing Xiao - though, the latter condition was true more often than he’d like to admit. A stray crystalfly caught his eye, and he watched it as it fluttered about the ruins, slowly drifting towards a gap in the wall. Curious, Aether followed, trying his best to remain quiet in his movements, but when he made it to the small cave, the crystalfly had already startled and flown away. He sighed, perhaps he would ask Xiao to catch some more for him, or maybe buy some from that vendor in Liyue. No, he debated, he sold me 5 cores for 10k mora for crying out loud. Xiao it was, then. He’d just make almond tofu in return and hope Xiao didn’t scold him too much for being disrespectful to the adepti.
He turned to leave, but a blue object caught his eye. Confused, he turned back to the cave, and caught his breath at the sight. Another starconch, placed perfectly in the centre of a basalt pillar, as if it were on a pedestal. Surely, Xiao wasn’t responsible for this? He clearly spoke of trying to hide his messages, not make them appear as some lost relic.
Tentatively, he stepped towards it, as his heart rate increased. Slowly, he slipped his fingers under it, and pulled it up to his ear. He whispered to himself that it was probably left by someone else, trying not to get his hopes up, but he couldn’t help it.
Then the first words reached his ears, and he almost fainted.
“You once told me: you wish to seek me salvation. You once taught me: to celebrate my own life, tainted though by centuries of slaughter as it is. At the time, I was truly baffled - I still am. Your kindness… knows no bounds. You have shown me what it is to live a mortal life; a mundane life; a life that is worthy of such innocent smiles.”
If Aether was expecting Xiao’s voice once again, he certainly wasn’t expecting him to say so much. Let alone, a message he was almost certain was directed to him. Unfathomably, the message wasn’t even finished.
“A year ago, you wished me happy birthday, the crystal flies I sent you tangled in your hair as though you asked the storm winds themselves to style it for you. A year ago you surprised me once again with your kindness, that you had stayed up all night just to perfect my favourite dish. A year ago…
I fell in love with you.”
Aether felt his heart stop.
What?
His hands trembled as he strained to keep the shell to his ear, as the voice almost torturously continued in its confessions.
“And I think, no matter how this world changes, how you or I will change, I will still love you. I am unsure if anything could stop this now; this feeling inside me - I’m afraid it’s far too late.”
Aether forced himself to inhale, then exhale, willing his body to still. He… could hardly believe he was hearing Xiao’s voice say these words. He almost doubted that they were directed towards him, yet he could hardly imagine anyone else Xiao was remotely close enough with to hold these feelings for.
The shell, too, took a moment of breath, before continuing.
“But you are a traveller from beyond this world, and I am the last remaining Yaksha, soon to fall just as my comrades have. My only hope is… for you to find happiness, in spite of all that has been thrust upon you. I hope that the day you leave this world, you’ll wear a smile just as sweet as the day I met you.”
If Aether had any doubts about the identity of Xiao’s beloved, he certainly didn’t now. He swallowed, then swallowed again. He felt foolish for latching onto the smallest of hints in those other shells when this one spoke so clearly of what he so desperately wanted to hear. His heart was hurting so much, not just knowing Xiao loved- no, loves him, but also hearing how he already accepted his fate of loneliness.
Aether couldn’t help a sad chuckle that escaped him as he thought, I really need to teach you how to be loved, huh?
“I leave this starconch here,” Xiao’s voice continued, “secluded in a cave of Guyun, for I have not the courage to admit any of this to anyone. Perhaps a stray adventurer may come to find it, and hear of my woes. Or in the distant future, a researcher may dig it up, and learn of a Yaksha who dared dream of a peaceful life. Whoever may find this shell and listen to my message will know… I truly do love him”
Aether held his breath a few seconds more, before confirming the conch’s message was finally over. He let out a long, heavy sigh, bringing trembling hands to his chest as he hugged the shell tightly.
Xiao loves me, he repeats to himself. And he… thinks it can never be.
“Don’t you know… I feel the same.” Aether’s voice trembled, as he once again took a deep breath to steady himself. A tear touched his lip, as he finally realised he was crying. He decided to ignore it, as he stood ready to teleport - waverider be damned - clutching the starconch tightly in his hands.
Several guests stifled startled gasps as they watched the renowned traveller, face red with tears still falling down his cheeks, storm up the stairs of Wangshu inn. Even the boss herself had to cover her mouth to avoid making a remark, but spotting the determined look on his face, Verr Goldet had a pretty good inkling as to what it was about. In his wake, she rushed to distract the nearby guests, silently praying for the best for whatever the resident adeptus was about the face.
The moment Aether stepped onto the top-most balcony, he called.
“Xiao.”
Instantly, the adeptus was before him, arms crossed and eyes closed. “You… called?” He slowed as he opened his eyes to the sight before him. “Aether?”
“You’re so stupid!” He cried, shoving the conch towards him. Xiao, baffled, took it, eyes widening as he recognised just which conch it was. “You- you wanted an adventurer to find it? Well, I did! And, all those other conches you left? I found those too! And, maybe I’m stupid too! Because, here I was, hanging onto every accidental word you said to them, only to find this damn conch saying the things I’ve been waiting to hear for so long!”
Xiao could only watch in dumbfounded silence as tears poured from Aether’s eyes, his sobs interrupting his speech.
“You talk about it like… like it’s something you can’t have, like it’s somehow forbidden from you just because - what, you’re a Yaksha? If anyone deserves it, if anyone deserves to- to live a mundane life, it’s you! You deserve the world, Xiao, don’t you know? And archons if I don’t want to give it to you. D-don’t you know? Haven’t you realised that I… that I love you too?”
“Aether-”
“I love you, Xiao!” He shouted over him, before promptly throwing himself at Xiao, enveloping him in a bone-crushing hug. In fact, he could hear a cracking sound, and distantly recognised it as the shell breaking. He didn’t care, it didn’t matter any more. He was going to show Xiao just how much he deserved everything he spoke of so wishfully - and now that he knew his feelings were mutual, he was going to shower him in so much damn love that Xiao won’t know what to do with himself.
He felt hands hesitantly wrap around his shoulders, and he clutched him tighter. He felt fingers slowly dig into his skin, as if testing if this was some kind of cruel dream, but he didn’t care about the pain. He loved him.
“I love you,” he repeated out loud, much quieter now, and he felt Xiao nod in response.
When he finally let Xiao go, pulling away, he saw how his cheeks, too, were stained with tears. Yet when he cupped Xiao’s face with his own hands, once again repeating, I love you, that tear filled gaze shifted into a bright smile. And he swore to himself then and there, to always protect that smile.
Unable to help himself, he pulled Xiao back into a hug, far less desperate but no less loving. This time, Xiao hugged him back just as tightly. This time, when he once again confessed his love, Xiao returned:
“I love you too, Aether.”
An hour later, Aether lay in Xiao’s lap, loosely clinging to his neck as a hand tenderly unweaved his hair. Both of their faces were red, from lingering tears, but now also a fond blush as they finally relished in the mere presence of the other.
“I really liked your shells,” Aether murmured. “The ones you gifted me, I mean.”
“Mm, I’m glad.” Xiao’s voice was far hoarser than usual.
“I heard it took you a while to find the perfect shell.”
Xiao scoffed as Aether tiredly laughed. He buried himself into Xiao’s shoulder.
“I was going to get you some in return but, you had already talked into all the good ones.” He smiled into Xiao’s neck, pressing a light kiss to it. “I guess I’m just making you tofu again this year.”
“You don’t have to,” Xiao mutters.
“But it’s your birthday, I have to give you something.”
Xiao laughs quietly, something Aether felt more than heard, before sighing. “You’ve already given me all I could ever ask for, Aether.” He smiles, pressing a kiss of his own into Aether’s hair. “Thank you.”
Aether chuckles. “Anything for you, silly Yaksha. But next time, don’t use a conch. I might not find it.”
Xiao kisses him again, stifling a giddy smile. “I can’t make any promises.”