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Time and Too Much Don't Belong Together Like We Do

Summary:

"It’s in the soup.

 

It’s in the soup.

 

Oh my god it’s in the soup it fell in the soup it’s in the soup.

 

Ohhhhhhhhh my god oh my god oh my god ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmy—

 

A wet dog nose on the open back of her knee brings her cringing back to reality."

 

Or: Lupe tries to propose on a camping trip but drops the ring in the soup.

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Happy Jesslioe Holiday Gift Exchange, Julien!!

Notes:

Happy Holiday Gift Exchange, Julien!! You're so cool and I hope this fic is up your alley!

Title from "I Belong to You" by Brandi Carlile

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

It’s in the soup.

 

It’s in the soup.

 

Oh my god it’s in the soup it fell in the soup it’s in the soup.

 

Ohhhhhhhhh my god oh my god oh my god ohmygodohmygodohmygodohmy—

 

A wet dog nose on the open back of her knee brings her cringing back to reality.

 

A strangled cry comes up out of Lupe’s throat and she whips around, wiping her knee with her hand and glaring at Jess’ marshmallow of a Samoyed.

 

“Timber!” she hisses at him. “Not the time!” He gives her a high pitched bark. “Also, we talked about this,” she says, gesturing to the back of her knee. Timber pants at her for a moment, then steps forward, raises his paw, and barks again. Lupe sees a stick near his feet and sighs in frustration.

 

“Look,” she says to him, “I really don’t have time, I just fucked up big time while your dad is off getting firewood and I only have so much time to fix it before they get back.” She turns back to the soup, frantically digging through it with her spoon. She finds corn, potatoes, carrots, and a little bit of chicken, but no fucking ring.

 

She hears a whine behind her. Timber is too polite, too well-trained, to jump on her or paw at her like Jo’s idiot of a dog, but he is nothing if not persistent. When she peeks over her shoulder at him, he has nudged the stick in her direction and is panting his most winning pant. She sighs. “Fuck, ok.” Lupe turns around, picks up the stick, and throws it and Timber is off like a shot.

 

Lupe turns back around and continues pawing futilely through the soup.

 

God, if she was at home, she could just run this all through a strainer and dig through it with her hands like a fucking animal until she found the literal engagement ring she just dropped in there, but she can’t because she’s in the goddamn woods and she has one pot and the closest thing she has to a strainer is the fucking laundry bag she insisted they bring camping—

 

Lupe turns, slowly, to her backpack, considering. If she cuts a little section out of the laundry bag and ignores that she’s been using it for 3 days now and rigs it up like a net—

 

Timber comes bounding back through the trees, stick in his mouth, then drops it at her feet, panting happily.

 

Well. Putting her dirty laundry bag in the soup was probably a bad idea anyway.

 

Lupe picks up the stick again and hurls it as far as she can.

 

They’re not even close enough to a car or a town or a road for her to go buy a strainer because they’re so deep in the woods. Well, not so deep. When Jess and Lupe camp, there is only one rule. Well, there are a few rules, but the Lupe Rule is that, if they got seriously injured and there was no way for anyone to find them, they’re too far into the woods. She does not accept Jess’ handheld GPS as a way for someone to find them either—if they’re too far away from a trail for someone to hear Timber panic-barking, they’re too far. Jess can die in the woods on her own time, thank you very much, but Lupe will not go out that way.

 

So, they do a lot of camping at trailheads or down a trail. Jess’ rule, countering Lupe’s, is no campgrounds, or at least none that are very populated. “That’s not camping, that’s having shitty neighbors who burn Styrofoam in the fire pit,” Jess says, “and get high in the back loops.” Jess currently also has a baggy of edibles in the outside pocket of her rucksack. Their current campsite is a respectable and state park-mandated 150 feet from the nearest trail, but they are, at this point, several miles from the trailhead.

 

All of this means, much to Lupe’s chagrin in this moment, that the ring is, indefinitely, in the soup.

 

She groans and sinks down in a crouch, putting her head in her hands. God, she had one job, one fucking job, and she fucked it up. Esti will never let her live this down.

 

She’s crouched down so long that Timber comes back, stick in his mouth, and nudges her before dropping it at her feet.

 

This time, Lupe just stares at it through her hands. Timber whines, pawing the air before setting his paw down. Lupe goes to move except, as she reaches for the stick, she finds her hands still firmly on her head, her arms still stuck to her side. She goes to move again and finds herself stuck once more.

 

Slowly, she looks up, then over at Timber, head still in her hands. Timber, confusedly, crouches into the play position and whines. And Lupe bursts into tears.

 

Timber’s on her at once, licking her face, then her arms as she shields her face from him, finally bowling her over in his attempts to console.

 

“Ahh! Shit, Jesus, Timber!” Lupe yells. “Christ!” She rolls onto her stomach in the leaves and pushes up with her hands so she can get back on her feet without having her soft parts stepped on by a 60-pound dog.

 

There’s a whistle from behind her and both Lupe and Timber freeze for different reasons. There’s Jess. Timber gives Lupe’s elbow one more small lick before taking off. He makes it three feet, skids to a stop, then darts back for the stick. Then he’s off like a shot in Jess’ direction, dropping his stick at her feet.

 

Jess, for her part, looks concerned. “Lu?” she calls, ignoring the stick and coming closer. Lupe scrambles to her feet and hurriedly dusts herself off, red-faced. She hopes her eyes aren’t red and puffy but looks away just in case.

 

Jess sets her firewood down and comes closer, peering at Lupe in concern. “I’m ok,” Lupe says. Then, because she can’t help it, she sniffs and Jess closes the distance between them, gently holding Lupe by the shoulders.

 

“Wait, what happened?” Jess asks, trying to get Lupe to look at her and Lupe screws her face up in concentration, taking in a deep to keep from crying again.

 

“Nothing,” she says, looking determinedly away from Jess. Jess gives her a look, Lupe can see it in her posture out of the corner of her eye, and Lupe huffs slightly. “I was cooking dinner and I fell, that’s all.” Jess’ thumb starts rubbing lightly over her shoulder and Lupe has to bite the inside of her cheek to keep from crying again.

 

Jess’ hand leaves her shoulder to cup her jaw, gently guiding Lupe’s eyes to hers. “That’s all?” she asks softly, and God, Lupe wants to go to her, tell her everything, fall into her shoulder like she’s done so many times before, but the ring is in the soup and she spent so long picking it out and she can’t even believe she gets the chance to ask Jess to be hers and now the chance is gone because it’s in the soup, the ring is in the soup and it’ll be there until one of them chokes on it.

 

So, Lupe bites her tongue and nods, wretchedly, and says “Yeah, that’s all, just tripped. And it hurt.” And Jess nods. And Lupe nods too, except her eyes do a little squinchy crying thing and Jess pulls her in and guilt, guilt, guilt, and Lupe decides, there on Jess’ shoulder, that she can let a few tears out on the pretense that she just hurt herself.

 

“Come here,” Jess says, holding her tight, and Lupe melts into her, wrapping her arms around Jess’ waist and burying her face in their neck. Jess runs her hands up and down Lupe’s back and God does Lupe love this person, her fucking rock. And now she’s ready to cry about that, too.

 

Lupe, regretfully, pulls away from Jess and looks at the ground, sucking in a breath.

 

“Better?” Jess asks, and Lupe nods.

 

“Yeah,” she says. “Yeah, I think so. I’m just…tired. I don’t know.” She casts around, smells the soup in the air. “Hungry, maybe.”

 

Shit.

 

“Is the soup done? Should we eat?” Jess asks.

 

No, Lupe thinks, but her traitor mouth says “Yeah, it’s done.” She doesn’t move.

 

Jess watches her for a moment, then acts like she’s taken a hint and moves to get the bowls. Lupe leaps for her.

 

“Sorry, sorry, just tired,” she says, putting her hands on the bowls before Jess can reach them. “I’ll get it.” Jess looks more confused than she did before and Lupe smiles weakly at her. “Thanks for getting the firewood!”

 

Jess nods uncertainly. “Yeah, no problem,” they say. They jerk a thumb over their shoulder. “I’ll just go stack that actually, while you’re serving up the food.” Then they turn and leave Lupe blissfully alone. With the soup.

 

And now, the dilemma. Sure, there’s the dilemma of ‘where is the ring?’ but also the dilemma of ‘how do I get the ring to not end up in Jess’ bowl?’ And God there’s no surefire way of it, huh?

 

Cautiously, Lupe begins to spoon the top portion of the soup into Jess’ bowl, reasoning that the ring likely would have sunk to the bottom. It works at first, the liquid in the pot goes down, Jess gets soup in her bowl, but after a few spoonfuls, Lupe realizes that this way, Jess will end up with only the broth and Lupe will end up with only the chunks and Jess will still realize that something is wrong. So, Lupe sucks it up and just scoops soup into the bowls normally, cringing with every spoonful and not even once spotting the ring.

 

Jess comes back and Lupe slowly, slowly hands her her bowl.

 

“It’s done, but I think there might be a bone or something in there,” she tells Jess with a straight face, like a fucking liar, “so be careful.” God she’s going to Hell for this. “Don’t want you to break your teeth or anything.”

 

Jess frowns. “There shouldn’t be any bones,” she says. “This was from a package of chicken breasts we got at the store.”

 

And Lupe knows that, she was the one who cooked them, so she just shudders while Jess inspects the soup and says, “Well, I felt something hard while I was mixing but I couldn’t find it.” Which, she fucking supposes, is true.

 

Jess nods, warily, and picks up her spoon. “I’ll keep an eye out,” she says, then considers. “Tongue out,” she corrects.

 

Lupe laughs. She does feel it, really, but God, the situation.

 

Jess would eat standing up if she had her druthers, but Lupe likes to have some semblance of a seated meal, even in the woods, so they sit cross-legged on the ground and Jess signals Timber to lie down by her side.

 

Lupe watches Jess dip her spoon into the soup with such intensity that Jess actually looks up. Lupe looks away, dipping her own spoon into the soup, stirring it idly. The thing is, it’s Jess. Jess didn’t want a flashy ring, Lupe knew this, and so she got them a ring to match their personality. It’s silver with a wooden inlay over it, a beautiful, polished band. The wood glows in the light and there’s a neat line of silver splitting the wood as well, creating a beautiful, modern ring that Lupe thinks (hopes) Jess will love.

 

But the thing about a wooden ring is that it is, well, wooden. The silver is heavy enough that it keeps it from floating and the wood, well, doesn’t reflect light in the same way that metal does. It’s literally the worst ring Lupe can think of to drop in a pot of soup besides, maybe, an edible one. Which, she supposes, would actually just end with her eating the ring, so this one is probably worse. She closes her eyes, mouth a thin line, and tries to keep from banging her head into her bowl.

 

“Mmm,” Jess says, and Lupe opens her eyes in time to see them raise their eyebrows. “This is good, Lu, what did you put in it?”

 

Metal. Wood. My whole future and potentially yours. “Um,” Lupe mumbles, “carrots, potatoes, onions, chicken? Celery?” She wracks her brains. “Spices?”

 

Jess smiles at her. “It’s good, querido.” And Lupe’s heart is so, so full that when Jess dips her spoon back into the soup she almost lunges over the space between them to knock it from her hands.

 

But Jess takes a bite. And chews. And appears to enjoy it. So Lupe, hesitantly, so hesitantly, brings her own spoonful up to her mouth and takes a bite.

 

And it’s good! Damn, it’s really good. Someone should wife her up, she figures wryly. She lets her breath out in a huff, a quiet, disparaging chuckle.

 

“Hey.”

 

Lupe stops cold. She flicks her eyes up at Jess and sees their eyes so full, so concerned, and she swallows, hard.

 

“You ok?” Jess asks, and Lupe holds her breath.

 

“Yeah,” she says, and almost believes the way it sounds. “Why wouldn’t I be?” Her eyes flick back to the soup.

 

“You just seem…” Jess searches for a word, “…I don’t know, quiet this evening. Thought I’d check in.”

 

And if Lupe could just sink into those quiet, thoughtful eyes she would. If Lupe could just breathe out and let go, no questions asked, she would. But she has a job to do (one job, actually), and by God she’s going to do it and do it right.

 

“…I’m alright,” she says after a moment. “I just…” she casts around for an excuse. “My elbow hurts,” she lies, “from falling earlier.”

 

Jess sucks a breath in through her teeth. “You want me to take a look at it?”

 

And no, Lupe does not want that, actually, so she shakes her head. “No,” she says, “I think it’s just a bruise.”

 

Jess frowns. “A bruise can still mean an injury,” she says, “you sure?”

 

Lupe nods, then carefully takes a bite of her soup. No ring. “Yeah,” she says, “I’m alright.”

 

Jess nods. “Well,” they say, “if it keeps bugging you, let me know and we’ll see what we can do.”

 

And suddenly, Lupe spots a faint but tell-tale glimmer at the bottom of her bowl and lunges for it. She scoops up the ring (and a potato) with her spoon, puts it in her mouth, and sucks it clean.

 

She tongues it to the side of her mouth. “Thanks hon,” she says, relief flooding through her, “I’ll let you know.” When Jess nods and looks back at her bowl, she spits it surreptitiously into her hand and slips it into her pocket feeling like she just pulled off the heist of the century.

 

----

 

It’s a while later when they finally crawl into their tent to sleep and in that time Lupe’s spirits lifted considerably. The soup became what it was, delicious, and Lupe finally started laughing at Jess’ jokes. Jess reached over at one point while they were rinsing out their dishes and tousled her hair, saying they were glad she was feeling better, and Lupe felt loved, and safe, and like she fit in her own skin again.

 

But still, the ring felt heavy in her pocket.

 

She takes it out now, in the quiet and dark of the tent. Jess is asleep next to her, curled on her side with an arm around Lupe’s middle, and Timber is curled at their feet, adding his soft dog snores to the quiet air.

 

The ring is warm in her fingers from having been in her pocket so long and she can just make it out in the faint light. It’s a full moon tonight, or near it (Lupe doesn’t keep track), and its light is bathing the tent in a soft glow, just enough to see by.

 

Lupe’s fingers are almost instantly cold when she pulls them from her and Jess’ sleeping bag nest, but she clings to the warmth of the ring, turning it this way and that. The wood doesn’t look too the worse for wear for having been in hot soup for, what, half an hour? Twenty minutes? God, it felt like two years… It looks alright, though.

 

The silver glints in the moonlight as Lupe turns it over and over in her fingers. What a fucking mess. She sighs, pinching the ring between thumb and forefinger and flipping it on and off the tip of her thumb. She had been so ready to do it too. Or at least working up to it.

 

It’s just that the past two years have been the happiest of Lupe’s life. She feels so content and peaceful, she doesn’t know how she could ever possibly leave it behind. She’s got something she can build with Jess, something she has been building, and a ring and a celebration won’t change the security she feels but it will be a way to show Jess how much she thinks of all the support she’s given her over the years.

 

She’s still nervous though.

 

And she shouldn’t be! They’ve talked about this—Lupe wouldn’t surprise Jess with a life change after all. They both agreed that that would be something they wanted in the future (Lupe’s heart was in her ass for that conversation too), and then, full of the sweet, warm thrill of it all, they had had the best sex of Lupe’s life. How could she ever give this life up?

 

“Mmm, what’s that?” asks a groggy voice. Lupe starts so violently she almost drops the ring, then freezes stock still. Jess, who had been tensing up to pull herself closer to Lupe, freezes as well.

 

Lupe opens her mouth to reply to Jess’ question, but nothing comes out. Adrenaline rushes through her body. She wants to put the ring away, wants to say nothing, go back to sleep, but she can’t make herself speak, can’t make herself move, can only watch in horror (and, somewhere deep down, relief) as Jess opens her eyes a little more fully and takes in the sight before her eyes.

 

“Wait.” Jess clears their throat and their next words come out clearer. “Wait, is that a ring?”

 

Lupe sucks in a breath. Holds it.

 

“Lupe.” Jess hoists herself to look closer at Lupe. “Lupe,” Jess says again, and her eyes are wide, and her lips are parted, and Lupe’s breath is coming in short, shallow gasps.

 

But there is uncertainty in Jess’ expression, uncertainty like she isn’t sure this is real, like she isn’t sure she’s understanding right, like she’s missing something when Lupe is literally lying there with a ring perfectly tailored to her and a question on her lips and a deeper love for Jess than she’s had for basically anyone in her life and that’s what does it.

 

Lupe tries to speak. Stops. Clears her throat.

 

“I— Yes. Yes, it’s a ring. It’s um,” she clears her throat again, “it’s actually a ring for you, if you’ll have it.” Jess is staring at her, eyes wide, unmoving, and Lupe feels her cheeks heat up as she scrambles to a sitting position.

 

“It’s just, well,” Lupe sucks in a breath, says her piece in a rush, “the last two years have been the happiest of my life and I can’t imagine my life without you and I wanted to ask you out here because you love the outdoors, you’re more yourself here than anywhere else, and I love being out here with you because I get to see that side of you and I love being with you because I get to see all sides of you and I love you because I, I just do! And you’re caring, and kind, and God, you’ve changed my life for the better, definitely for the better, God, I was a wreck when I met you, or not a wreck, but a mess and—”

 

Lupe stops to suck in a breath, which is when she notices the tears welling up in Jess’ eyes. “Oh no,” she says. “Oh no, I did it wrong. Jess…” She reaches out for Jess’ face, her thumb brushing the tears away from her eyes.

 

Jess catches her hand. Holds it there. “Lupe,” she says again. Her gaze is like a magnet, like a lodestone. “Ask me the question.”

 

And suddenly, it’s easy.

 

“Jess,” she starts, then takes a breath and lets it out. A deep certainty fills her and she rubs her thumb over Jess’ cheek again. Jess briefly closes her eyes. “Jess Ann McCready,” Lupe starts again, “will you marry me?”

 

And Jess lets go of Lupe’s hand, hoists herself up on her palms, and kisses Lupe, long and sure. She pulls back, eyes closed, brow furrowed just slightly. Then they open their eyes, and God that look would kill a lesser man.

 

Jess nods. “Yes,” they whisper. They suck in a breath. “Yes,” they say again, and lean back in for another kiss. They pepper the kisses, pepper the ‘yes’s, onto Lupe’s lips over and over again and there is such a love in Lupe’s heart that she feels full to bursting with it.

 

All of a sudden, she’s crying. Warm tears are running down her cheeks and she’s lifting the hand not holding the ring to cup Jess’ face and Jess is pulling her legs under her so she can hold Lupe’s face in both hands and Lupe is kissing her long and hard, then just kissing her, any inch of skin she can reach, until Jess holds her still, gently, firmly, Lupe’s head in her hands and says, once again, “Yes.”

 

And Lupe breathes a shallow breath. And Lupe reaches for Jess’ left hand. And kisses the knuckles on it. And then reaches up with her other hand and gently slides the ring onto Jess’ third finger.

 

And Jess chuckles. And Jess sniffs. And runs their free hand over the ring.

 

Then, from the other end of the tent, Timber whines, loathe to miss out on the fun.

 

Jess laughs, looking at him, then raises her eyebrows at Lupe. Lupe smiles and nods and Jess whistles softly. Timber springs to his feet and comes over to them, snuffling first at Jess, then at Lupe. Lupe winces a little as he walks over her legs but accepts a kiss from him before moving her face out of the path of his tongue.

 

Jess buries her hands in his coat, murmuring softly to him.

 

“You were worried we’d leave you out, huh?” Jess finds a sweet spot and Timber closes his eyes, panting happily. Jess pulls back. “You wanna see, boy?” She looks up at Lupe. “Lu, do you have a light actually?”

 

“Oh!” Lupe says and starts patting the tent floor around her. She comes up with her headlamp and shines the light down on Jess’ hand. “Here we go.” If her hands are shaking, it’s just from the adrenaline.

 

“Oh, Lupe,” Jess breathes, turning the ring back and forth. “Lupe, that’s beautiful.” And it is. Even in the harsh, white light of the headlamp, the wood is oiled to perfection, catching the light like brown eyes in the sun. The silver adds a gorgeous streak through the wood, really highlighting it, and sits against Jess’ pale skin perfectly. Jess’ blue-gray eyes flick up to hers, hold her gaze. Jess reaches out and draws Lupe to her again, kissing her long and sweet, and Lupe feels like she did something right.

 

Timber whines again and Jess crosses her free hand between them without looking to ruffle his head. And then Lupe is aware of a licking sound to her left that goes on for a full ten seconds before Jess finally pulls back, laughing.

 

“He’s licking the ring,” she says. “What, are you excited for this too, boy?”

 

And then Lupe’s eyes widen. “The soup…” she says, blood rushing to her face.

 

Jess looks at her curiously. “The soup?”

 

Lupe tucks an arm across her middle and pulls a hand up over her face. “Yeah…” she starts, “…the soup. I-I was going to pro—” she stops, sucks in a breath and tries again, “propose,” an exhale, “over dinner, but I took the ring out to practice and then I,” her cheeks heat up, “I dropped it in the soup.” She looks up at Jess through her fingers and finds them staring at her. Then Jess bites their lip, holding back a smile, and their shoulders start shaking.

 

Lupe drops her hand incredulously, a smile already coming to her lips. “Don’t laugh!” she says, laughing. “I’m going to have nightmares about that, that was traumatic!”

 

Jess is openly laughing now, reaching out for Lupe’s arm and rubbing her thumb back and forth over her sleeve. “Wait,” Jess starts, “is this why you were upset earlier?” Her voice is high and sweet, unguarded, and her eyes are so soft on Lupe’s that the shame and ridiculousness that Lupe felt is chased away. Even so, Lupe closes her eyes and laughs, just once, embarrassment causing little sparks in her ears. She nods, then opens her eyes, and Jess reaches out, taking her hand. “Lu,” she says, her voice is soft and low.

 

Lupe laughs. “I was so worried that you would get it in your bowl and break your teeth, or choke on it,” she says. “That’s why I said that thing about there being a bone.”

 

Jess squeezes her hand. “You could have told me,” she says sweetly, but there’s mirth in her eyes. “I would have helped you look.”

 

“But that would have ruined it!” Lupe says. “I couldn’t have just proposed with no ring, which is what would have happened because I couldn’t say ‘help me look for this ring,’ without explaining that I was trying to propose! And that I fucked it all up!”

 

Jess laughs again, and God it’s a nice laugh. “Lupe,” they say, holding her hand firmly, “if you had handed me a bowl of soup and asked me to marry you, I would have said yes, no questions asked.” And Lupe laughs, but her breath catches in her throat, her heart full to bursting. God, she’s going to marry this person one day. And, she realizes with a start that that’s no longer just a thought in her head.

 

“Oh my god,” she says, realizing suddenly, “you said yes!” And Jess laughs and kisses her, echoing the sentiment over and over again.

Notes:

This is the ring I picked out for Jess. Honestly, most of the wooden rings on this site would work, but I liked this one! Also, Lupe doesn't have a ring yet in this one but I figure she'd get some vintage past, present, future ring like this. Solid, a statement, but not necessarily flashy if that's possible with a past, present, future ring lol.

 

I had such a good time writing this fic and Julien, I hope you love it!!

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