Chapter Text
Merlin smiled as he listened to everyone laugh. He was sitting at the local pub enjoying a nice cold pint with all the usual gang. Gwaine and Percy were sitting at the far end of the table trying to see who could down a pint the quickest, Merlin’s money was on Gwaine, obviously. Gwen and Lance were snuggling up together further down the table. Then there was Morgana who was whispering something into Elena’s ear whilst Leon pretended not to eavesdrop. And finally, Merlin and Arthur were seated at the end of the table.
Merlin loved them all dearly, but sometimes he still felt like such an outsider. Morgana and Arthur were half siblings and had gone to school with the rest of the gang, whilst Merlin had only known them a little longer than six months. Gwen had been the first person he’d met, they’d got talking one day when Merlin had been working his shift at his Uncle Gaius’ coffee shop and Gwen had came in for an order. Merlin would honestly say he preferred Gwen the most, she was kind and gentle, never one to judge. After they’d spoken, Gwen had left only to return the next day, then the day after that each time bringing along one of her friends. And before he knew it, Merlin found himself a whole new bunch of friends.
“Isn’t that right, Merlin?” Morgana asked pulling Merlin from his thoughts.
“Um.. Sorry..What?” He asked dumbly, his face heating with embarrassment.
Arthur snorted, earning himself a smack around the back of his head, courtesy of Morgana.
“I was just telling the others that the barman took quite a liking to you.” Morgana smirked. Which did nothing to calm Merlin’s blush.
“Your saying he fancied Merlin?.” Arthur laughed, his whole body shaking like it was the funniest thing in the world. And it hurt. Merlin knew he wasn’t going to win any beauty prizes any time soon, and yeah, maybe he didn’t dress in fancy expensive clothes like Arthur did. But he still considered himself a decent looking bloke.
“Arthur, Your being mean.” Elena admonished. “Of course the barman took a shine to our Merlin, who wouldn’t? he’s positively adorable.” She smiled sweetly at Merlin who returned the gesture halfheartedly.
“Yeah if your idea of adorable is a twink who looks as though he’s unable to dress himself and as never used a comb in his life.” Arthur chuckled. “I bet the blokes got better taste.”
“Arthur....” Morgana said in a low voice, her tone promising bodily harm.
But Arthur either didn’t notice or chose to ignore her. “Just watch. Ten minutes from now and I’ll have him wrapped around my little finger.” He said.
They could only watch as Arthur stood from his chair and made his way towards the bar.
“I’m sorry, Merlin.” Morgana said softly.
“Yeah. Take no notice mate, Arthur’s just being a dick.” Gwaine added before reaching across the table to steal Lance’s unguarded pint.
“Hey, it’s fine. I mean I should be used to it by now, shouldn’t I?” Merlin offering a small smile, but it appeared sad and bitter. “I just wish I knew what his problem was.” And really he did. Arthur had been the only one of the group who had shown any dislike towards him, the man would constantly talk down to him, belittle him at any given chance. Merlin had snarked back at first thinking they would eventually find some even ground, but Arthur’s sneers didn’t stop so Merlin gave up hope. He no longer rose to Arthur’s bait instead he forced himself to ignore the remarks completely. Well, he tried at least. But truthfully, every condescending word that came out of Arthur’s mouth would cut a little deeper into his heart.
“Come on, cheer up. Let’s not let Arthur ruin a perfectly good night.” Leon said cheerfully. “It’s my round so who’s up for another?”
Immediately everyone started talking over one another leaving poor Leon to try to work out who wanted what. Merlin ignored them and turned his attention to the bar, he sighed sadly when he caught sight of Arthur and the barman - who appeared to only have eyes for him an hour earlier. - sharing a passionate kiss. The angle looked awkward, Arthur had his hands pressed against the polished wood using it for leverage as he leaned across to the other man.
“What are you having, Merlin?” Leon called from across the table.
“I’m not really in the mood so I think I’m just gonna head off.” Merlin stood and grabbed his jacket that he’d hung on the back of his chair earlier.
“Don’t go.” Morgana and Gwen said in unison. And for a moment Merlin was tempted to stay, but then a loud laugh erupted from the other end of the pub. Merlin glanced over his eyes stopping at the sight of Arthur, his head thrown back as he laughed whilst the barman blushed a deep shade of red.
“I’ve got an early shift tomorrow so It’s probably best I leave anyway.” He said, forcing his voice to remain even. He didn’t know what was worse, Arthur’s behavior or the pitying looks the rest of them always gave him afterwards. “I’ll call you, yeah.” He threw over his shoulder as he made his way across the room.
It was only when he stepped into the cold night air, safe away from prying eyes and sympathizing friends, that Merlin finally allowed his tears to fall. They were tears of humiliation, frustration. They were tears of anger.
He was angry with Arthur for walking over him, again.
He was angry with himself for falling for the rude, conceited prat in the first place.
Merlin knew everyone was aware of his feelings for Arthur, he suspected that even Arthur had managed to work it out and the constant flirting with other men was his way of telling Merlin that he didn’t stand a chance. But Merlin, being the idiot that he is had carried on pining. Well, no more. Merlin promised himself as he roughly swiped the tears from his eyes. From now on Arthur could do what and who he bloody well pleased, because he was going to move on with his life. He was going to piece his pride back together and find someone who actually cared for him.
As far as Merlin was concerned, Arthur Pendragon could kiss his ass.
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