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Much to Luo Binghe’s distaste, him and Shen Qingqiu had been spending the last few days at the Qing Jing Peak. Of course, Luo Binghe’s presence wasn’t actually necessary, much less requested but not accompanying his Shinzun’s every step would displease him much more than visiting his former Peak for a few days.
Shen Qingqiu had not even proposed for him to stay in the Demon Realm this time, since he knew very well that wouldn’t happen. Not only was Luo Binghe fiercely protective over his husband but also almost equally as jealous whenever something other than himself became the center of his Shizun’s attention. If Shen Qingqiu was to admire the beauty of a flower along the way Luo Binghe would stomp it into the ground for stealing his husband’s affection. In his ideal world the only thing his Shizun should ever admire, adore, smile at or compliment was him.
While his husband was attending business, Luo Binghe passed his time in the Bamboo House, acting like a devoted housewife, cooking, cleaning and tending to every need his husband may have. He would do anything that would, hopefully, earn him his Shizun’s praise. Those were the only words worth hearing. Aside from that, everyone from Qing Jing Peak, except maybe Ning yingying. When Shen Qingqiu was gone he would silently seethe at the thought of people like Liu Qingge being, unrightfully and undeservingly, blessed with his husbands presence.
Despite those headaches Luo Binghe, of course, had to pass his time somehow.
As Shen Qingqiu walked through the door of the Bamboo House he was already bracing himself for the impact that was surely to come. His husband would throw himself enthusiastically into his Shizun’s arms after a long day of missing him. The peak lord was met with confusion when no one came racing towards him upon his arrival, not even an excited cry of his name. Nothing.
His husband’s entire attention had been caught by a book he was firmly holding in both of his hands. He was too distracted to take in his surroundings nor hear someone entering the room. His expression seemed appalled and curious at the same time. There was anger in his eyes, Shen Qingqiu was of course able to tell. His teary eyes could pretty much mean anything. No matter the feeling, Luo Binghe would find it reasonable to cry.
“Binghe?“ Shen Qingqiu asked, almost carefully. The addressed looked up at his husband through wet long eyelashes. “Shizun…“ Luo Binghe pressed the book tight to his chest. How he spoke the name sounded more like a pitiful whine than anything else. Are you a young maiden or the protagonist of a stallion novel?!, Shen Qingqiu thought aghast.
One look towards Luo Binghe’s chest told him everything he needed to know. He knew this book. The cover read “The Regret of Chunshan“. He gulped. So now he knew what kind of crying this was. Luo Binghe was about to tearfully beg him to recreate some shameless filthy porn scene from this horribly horrible book. Déjà-vus flashed before his eyes. He was thinking of the quickest way to talk himself out of this without giving his husband a chance to guilt trip him into anything he desired when said man caught him off guard.
“Shizun,“ He miserably drew his name out again in a low whine, “I dont like this book.“ Shen Qingqiu had to try his hardest not to let an audible ‘huh???‘ slip. Now, this wasn’t at all what he was expecting. Was Luo Binghe trying to trick him somehow?
After this long delay the embrace Shen Qingqiu was expecting minutes ago finally came. He fell to the ground with the half-demon embracing him. “You’re warm. I-“ Luo Binghe interrupted himself with a sob and his Shizun’s confusion only increased to grow. “I like that you’re warm, Shizun.“ He managed to finish his sentence, whispering to not break out in tears again.
In hopes of easing his confusion Shen Qingqiu grabbed the book that fell to the ground along with them. His eyes widened as he was reading swiftly through the text.
“Luo Binghe held his Shizun’s lifeless corpse strong in his grip. His insides were cold, like his skin, only warmed by Luo Binghe’s own hands and heat radiating off his body. The insides would soon be, too, warm again when the demon would release his pleasure inside him. The still corpse was only moved by the aggressive thrusts of the demon lord. He was free to live out all the fantasies he had secretly harbored as a teen. Fantasies his Shizun could have never accepted. His forbidden desires were finally coming true. He observed the slacking head of his Shizun. The lifeless eyes were staring right back at him while he was passionately…“
Shen Qingqiu had read enough. According to Luo Binghe’s reaction this was quite the opposite of how he had spent the five years of his Shizun’s death. He had spent them in mourning. Shen Qingqiu had seen it with his own two eyes how the grief had driven him close to insane. He cursed the author, harsher than anytime before, in his head.
“I know I- I kept your body but-“ He was sobbing again. Even though crying seemed to be the half-demon’s favorite past time Shen Qingqiu knew, as this man’s Shizun and husband, that this one was different. This wasn’t his usual self-pity cry with a humorous undertone, it was real and heart wrenching. It was when there were so many words and feelings inside his heart that they would overflow as tears. Shen Qingqiu held him tight and cradled his cheek with one hand. No matter how often he would wipe the tears, more would follow. It was difficult to suppress his own tears in this situation. He feared that his own tears would only bring the situation to escalate.
“I only did it because I missed you so much and I didn’t want it to be true. I just wanted to pretend you hadn’t left me. I never found satisfaction in it, Shizun. I swear. Instead-“ he spoke disrupted and hesitantly, collecting himself once every while. However, Shen Qingqiu did not interrupt. He sensed that this was something his husband wanted and needed to say and simultaneously he hoped desperately that this would cure some of the pain in Luo Binghe’s heart that had stayed with him from after these five years.
“Instead, I woke up everyday reminded that Shizun was gone and never coming back. And no matter how hard I tried nothing could bring Shizun back. Every touch fueled the feeling of missing Shizun, of longing for Shizun. I never…“
“I know.“ The peak lord reassured.
“And this Shizun promises to never leave again. This husband promises.“ A small but genuine smile bloomed within Luo Binghe’s face. He was truly a simple man, Shen Qingqiu’s white lotus.
“You promised.“
“I did.“
Although, Shen Qingqiu wasn’t a man of many words, that night he talked for hours until Luo Binghe fell asleep inside his warm embrace.