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Akiren Gets The Last Laugh (Akechi Gets Roasted)

Summary:

The interrogation room scene of 11/20 but the protagonist embarrasses the fuck out of Akechi before getting shot

(Akechi gets corrected (bullied) for his botched paraphrasing of Hegel)

Notes:

This is a joke obviously. I just really hoped while playing Persona 5 Royal that someone called Akechi out on misquoting Hegel. It would have embarrassed the fuck out of him; he thinks he’s such a smartass and to be corrected would kill him. Also what a gay thing to do, to quote Hegel in your first meeting with someone, and to completely mess it up at that. I love him

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Work Text:

As Akechi entered the interrogation room and promptly shot the guard who so foolishly accompanied him into the secure room, he couldn’t help but feel a shiver of pure thrill run through him. He had killed many on his soon-to-end journey of gaining the trust of his piece of shit father and playing along as the perfect puppet before his ultimate betrayal, but never before had he slaughtered outside of the metaverse. Despite that excitement thrumming through him, he remained calm in composure. He still had a show to put on.
Looking over at his rival, he made note of the bruised young man. Akechi knew this would likely be the case, it was only logical to assume that the piece of shit pawns in blue would get off on the power trip of possessing the infamous Phantom Thieves leader, basking in the brief moment in their lives they have any power at all. Guessing by the emptied syringes littering the floor, they had fun with it, too.

Pitiful, how the boy looked. The face of a lost cause, and one who had been beaten both literally and figuratively past the point of any possible denial about that fact. Drugged, battered, and slumped in his chair over the cold steel table, he is forced to look up at Akechi. Forced to finally face reality; the reality that he is not Akechi’s superior, and at this moment, he is no one’s superior. The poor boy thought he was better than Akechi. He may not have said it, but Akechi was no imbecile. Joker could now understand how he is never going to be more than nothing, and to think that he could be better than the detective- to defy the inherent loneliness and worthlessness they were both burdened with the moment they were thrown away by the trash adults of society, and try to create the illusion of hope? It was laughable. And finally, even if only for seconds, he could see that cold truth wash over this… acquaintance of his. It was time to end this.

Without looking over,
“I owe you for all of this… thanks.”
Ren looked forward dumbly in shock, thoughts probably running a mile a minute. Akechi fixed his glove before continuing, turning to address him directly
“That’s right. You and your little friends were vital to our plan. And now, it will be completed.”
Akechi was met with continued silence. A pity, but at least this would keep things easier.
“Your popularity truly was quite stunning. That just made using you all the more worthwhile…”
Finally, he drew closer to the criminal, drawing his gun until it nearly pressed against the thief’s forehead. Time to deliver the final lines, truly the cherry on top. It was all going according to plan.
“Have you finally pieced it all together?”
Ren never broke eye contact, and his face still kept that stupid look of defiance etched onto it. Not for long.
“Case closed… This is where your ‘justice’ ends. Any last words?”
Still unmoving, Ren spoke for the first time in their encounter.
“I do, actually.”

Akechi wouldn’t fall for the bait. He was still somewhat surprised that the leader was finally speaking, though. Goro simply readjusted his grip on the gun and stared, waiting for him to spit out whatever sentimental bullshit he felt he needed to before his death.

“When we first met, in Akasaka Mitsuke at the TV station…” Amamiya continued,
“Yes, I remember quite well. What about it?” Akechi promptly replied. This was getting annoying, and he could feel himself growing impatient. This ruined the setup he had planned and just nearly executed.

“You paraphrased Hegel, mentioning that advancement couldn’t occur without both thesis and antithesis. I didn’t say anything at the time as I didn’t want to humiliate you, but Hegel didn’t say that. Hegel never even used the terms Thesis and Antithesis in his writings on dialectics, and you must have had him confused with Fichte. Hegel’s writings on advancement when it came to position and negation was hinged upon the belief that only with synthesis can advancement occur in true. I don’t know who you were trying to impress, but it was honestly embarrassing. Who would have thought that the pretty-boy twink who not only quoted but failed to quote Hegel in the first few sentences of our meeting would be the one to kill me.”

Ren finished with a smirk on his face, and Akechi pulled the trigger on impulse, watching the newly bloodied body still before slamming down onto the table. This is not how this was supposed to go.
“DAMMNIT, DAMMNIT, DAMMNIT!” He shouted, composure falling completely as he was filled with a mortified rage. Everything was fucking ruined and he could swear he can still see remnants of that smug little smile on Amamiya’s dead face. Goddamnit.

Notes:

I am aware of the fact that to speak like this the protag would have to be actually there as opposed to his shadow. Which doesn’t really make any sense unless Sae somehow heard this entire speech beforehand or, alternatively, Ren actually gets shot and killed in this. Doesn’t really matter either way here. Pretend this all works lol