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Will gets hit on too often. Too often by girls, at that.
It’s quite a crazy concept to El, how easily Will can turn down a pretty girl like that.
She watches as he declines yet another ‘date’ from a girl that’s volunteering at the school, in complete shock.
She wants to mention something about it, but she doesn’t wanna hurt his feelings or anything.
“Why do you always turn down those pretty girls?” El asks anyway. Will’s face is almost as white as a ghost, and El’s convinced for a moment that he may pass out right there.
“It’s..hard to explain, alright?” he turns her down, and El frowns. Because she’s curious, and needs to know what’s up with her brother.
“But they’re all so nice to you! and you still say no!” her frown deepens as she says this, and Will finally turns to look at her. He looks a little confused.
“Do you wanna go on dates with them?” he asks, and she flushes. El’s never really been familiar with the concept of going on dates with girls like that.
She wasn’t even sure it was allowed. She’s heard the way people like that are talked about on the news, and she’s only worried.
Will seems to recognize her confusion, and places a comforting hand on her shoulder. “It’s okay to be confused, alright?” El nods in response.
Are girls allowed to go on dates with other girls? When she went to the mall with Max, was that a date? She barely understands what a date is in the first place.
She wants to ask, but she fears to see the same disgusted look on her brother's face as she saw on the news.
Instead, he smiles. And El feels safe.
“Are girls allowed to date other girls?” her voice is quiet and cowering, but Will's expression doesn’t seem to change.
He seems shocked, like that wasn’t what he expected her to say, but he doesn’t seem upset. Or disgusted.
“I think so.” and the shock drains, leaving a smile. Will's smile is full of something genuine, and El thinks she understands.
Neither of them are sure how this took such an emotional turn, but El decides to speak up and say something that completely breaks it.
“Is that why I felt the um…butterflies? in my stomach, when i saw a picture of Wonder Woman? She is very pretty,” she smiles hesitantly, and Will’s smile bursts into laughter.
El thinks she heard him say ‘maybe’ but he was laughing too much for her to hear. Too bad his laugh is super contagious, because El begins to laugh too.
Will’s laughter begins to slow, and El decides she can calm too. She has a question in mind, but fears it’s a little too.. insensitive?
“You turn down the girls…because you feel that way for boys instead?” she asks, and a part of her understands.
After breaking up with Mike, El realized maybe dating isn’t her thing. But after thinking about it, she just really didn’t like the idea of going on corny dates with boys.
And then, Will introduced her to the idea of going out with girls instead. And she feels like she finally understands what’s going on.
“Yeah, I guess you could say that.” Will nods, and tears form in his eyes. El understands what he’s going through now, and can finally help him.
So she pulls Will into a hug, and even if she doesn’t quite understand how to comfort people, a girl can try.
They hug for what feels like forever, as Will cries into El’s shoulder, and they finally part.
“Sorry.” he mutters, and El smacks him in the arm. Joyce told her to never apologize for having feelings. Will yelps at her smacking him, but he still smiles.
“Joyce said to never apologize over feelings.” El crosses her arms, and Will laughs a little at her. If she can’t comfort him, she can at least make him laugh and smile a little. “Oh! Yeah!”
Will looks confused as she runs off to her room, digging around for a very specific magazine that Max might’ve given her.
After some time passes, and El learns some new things, she finally gets it. She knows why her brother decided to turn down all the pretty girls, why she thinks the girls are so pretty, and a bunch of other new things.
And once he finishes, it all clicks.
Why he looked so awkward and nervous at the snowball, why he never got a girlfriend over the summer, why the painting wasn’t actually for a girl like she thought.
Wills likes boys, and El is proud of him. She’s proud that he had the courage to tell her, and not be scared to share who he truly is with her.
Because even if friends don’t lie, sometimes it’s okay to keep secrets. As long as they’re okay to keep! Sometimes telling the truth is your best option. Trust me, she’s learned the hard way.
They spend what feels like an eternity going through magazines Max gave her, laughing at all the things they see.
El asks him too many times if he likes any of them, and he says they aren’t his type.
She’s curious on what his type may be, but she doesn’t wanna be nosey. Plus, she doesn’t even know what her own type is!
She asks if Will may have some kind of magazine she can look at, but he tells her that he’s never really liked girls.
It’s always been a lingering feeling for him, that’s always told him something’s off.
Once his friends began to talk about girls — Dustin and Lucas with Max, Mike occasionally (which eventually turned into all the time) about El, and Will had no one.
Because he could never point at a boy in a comic and say that he’s cute or compliment his appearance because it has never been seen as normal. El wishes she could understand that part.
Because complimenting girls as another girl is seen as kind, uplifting and even empowering. It’s normal. But complimenting a boys appearance as another boy, you have to be careful with your words.
Be careful with them, or you may have rumors spread about you, is what Will explained to her.
El guesses she can understand, but she wishes she didn’t. She wants love to be normal.
Love is a more foreign concept to her, not understanding it fully. But she wishes that people could love who they want to without having to hide away and pretend they’re something that they most definitely aren’t.
So as Will explains to her what being gay is, she wishes the best for her brother.