Chapter Text
“It’s magic, Merlin.” Moragna’s words were hushed and panic was pasted over her face. She was terrified. It was clear to Merlin that she was and he knew exactly how she felt.
But Merlin couldn’t pull her into an embrace and confess he was a sorcerer too, so he feigned ignorance, “What?”
“I’m your friend, you know I wouldn’t make this up.”
“Of course,” Merlin said with a slight nod of his head.
“Then you believe me? You think it’s magic too.” Morgana desperately searched Merlin’s face for some sort of sympathy or comfort but only got silence in return.
“Please Merlin,” she begged, “I just need to hear someone say it so I don’t have to keep feeling like I’m imagining it.”
Merlin thought over his options and weighed them up carefully. After seconds of silence, he said, “I don’t know what to say.”
Morgana slowly began to back away.
“Morgana, wait!” Merlin shouted after her but she’d already left. She was obviously confused and frankly terrified and he had just made her feel worse. Merlin tugged at his hair and internally cursed himself. It was at this moment he decided that he’d reveal his powers to Morgana. Just not tonight.
The following evening Merlin went to Morgana’s chambers under the guise that he was bringing her a sleeping draught from Gaius.
When she opened the door he held out the small bottle, “Gaius asked me to deliver this.”
Instead of taking it, she said, “I don’t need any potion thank you.”
Merlin almost took this as his cue to leave but Morgana began to speak again.
“Merlin, ignore what I said last night. I had a nightmare, I was upset.” As she began to explain herself, tears welled in her eyes.
“I know, I haven’t said anything to anyone.” Merlin hated seeing Morgana try to rationalise her magic because he knew he once did it himself.
She began walking away, “Sorry it’s usually Gwen who has to deal with me when I’m like this.” Her voice was wavering, it looked like any minute she’d burst into tears.
“I don’t mind, maybe I could help.”
“I doubt that.”
“You’d be surprised.” Merlin then closed the door behind him as he moved into the room. “I understand. I realise how frightening all this must be for you, especially for you.”
“Why especially for me?”
“You’re the king's ward, you know his hatred of magic more than anyone.”
“That’s what you think has been happening to me? The dreams, the fire, you think it was magic!” Morgana’s voice started to rise but it was unclear whether it was in anger or disbelief.
Merlin stayed quiet to her accusation.
“Why have you come here, Merlin? If it was just to deliver the sleeping draught you can take it back, I don’t want it.”
“I did come to deliver the draught but I also came here to tell you something.”
“Tell me what, Merlin?”
It was now or never.
“I- I have… I’m…” Merlin looked at the ground before whispering, “I have magic.”
Morgana’s eyes widened and she looked at Merlin as if waiting for him to tell her he was joking.
Merlin looked up at her, “I’m a sorcerer. I know how you feel because I’ve been there. I’m constantly saving Arthur yet having to hide who I am because if anyone found out I’d be executed.” Merlin explained.
Morgana still stood in what Merlin could only assume to be disbelief.
“I’ll show you.” Merlin then turned to a nearby candle, held his hand in front of him and chanted an incantation under his breath. The flame then morphs itself into the form of a dragon before returning to normal.
There was silence between the two as they stood apart waiting for the other to speak.
“So that time when there was that disease and Gwen’s father became ill, you were actually the sorcerer who cured him?”
Merlin slowly nods.
“Tell me, what other things have you done? You don’t have to tell me of course. How stupid am I alsing you to admit all of the ‘crimes’ you’ve commited. I could be a spy for Uther-”
“Morgana. It’s fine, I know you. You’re my friend! I don’t know where to begin though… Well the whole reason I got this job as Arthur’s manservant was because my magic allowed me to see the dagger and act quick enough to save him; there’s the time when Sir Valiant was fighting against Arthur, I used magic to reveal the snakes in his shield; I conjured the wind that ended up killing the Avank; When the Griffin came to Camelot I helped Lancelot kill it with magic; I healed Uther when Edwin tried to kill him; I was the one who saved Sophia although that one didn’t exactly go to plan, so I also used magic to destroy her and her father too; I slayed the questing beast using magic and also used it to save Arthur from certain death; when Kanen attacked Eldor I was the one using magic, not Will; I resealed Sigan’s soul back into the gem using magic; and finally add a hundred or so times I’ve saved Arthur when hunting.” As he finished speaking Morgana’s mouth was practically on the floor.
“You did all that?”
Merlin nodded.
“And Arthur has no idea?”
“He’s not as perceptive as he’d like to believe.”
Morgana laughed slightly and then moved to sit on her bed. As Morgana began to laugh, Merlin joined in too.
“So could you teach me then?” Morgana asked, “Magic, that is.”
“Of course! We can start at the basics and then I can teach you more advanced stuff if that’s okay with you.”
“It’s more than ok.”
Merlin smiled at her and she suddenly got up and pulled him into a hug.
“Thank you, Merlin,” She whispered.
And that's when it started. Every evening, after Merlin had finished his work for Arthur, he’d sneak out into the forests surrounding Camelot. Together they trained and practised all sorts of spells. The two always found themselves looking forward to it, so much so that Arthur’s impatience with Merlin began to grow. This went on for a couple of weeks. Although they grew close, There was always something unspoken between them. They had plenty of opportunities to share, whether that be in the silences between spells or gaps in stories they would tell, but neither said a word.
That was until one particularly cold evening, whilst taking a break, the two sat before a fire, huddled up. Merlin was the first to speak,
“You’ve been doing really well recently, your conjouratiotion is really coming along.”
Morgana, with a stick in hand, started to poke at the roaring flame. “You say that but I still feel like I’m taking longer than I should.”
Merlin turned to face her, placing a hand atop hers, “You are doing just fine, more than that! There's no time limit on this, we have all the time in the world.”
Morgana smiled and snuggled closer to Merlin, placing her head on his shoulder. “I wish I could just stay here and not have to deal with Uther or Arthur or anyone really. I feel so free out here, with you. I love spending time with you.” As Morgana lifted her head to look at Merlin, he saw his blue eyes gazing into hers. The two sat, faces inches away. Suddenly for the first time, time seemed to slow and before they knew it their lips had met. Quickly, they broke away.
“Sorry, I shouldn’t have,” Merlin apologised.
“No, it’s my fault…”
Silence surrounded them again. Merlin could feel his heart pounding in his chest. They sat staring at each other for a bit before coming together again, wrapped in a tighter embrace, lips clumsily crashing against each other.
“We shouldn’t be doing this,” Merlin gasped.
“I know,” she responded, pulling him closer.
They didn’t get any more training done that evening, instead opting to share their body heat by snuggling by the flames. But as it drew later and the two were about to part, Morgana spoke, “Merlin, why don’t you escort me back to my chambers?”
Merlin stumbled over his words but eventually managed to choke out, “I would love to but I really should be getting back… Gaius will worry…”
They once again locked eyes and Morgana smirked, grabbing his hand.
“Come on, it’ll be fun!”
Merlin awoke to the morning bells. He took in his surroundings and saw that he wasn't at home, but instead, in one of the rooms in the castle. As he sat up he looked over to Morgana who was rolled over with her bare back turned to him. He swung his legs over the side of the bed and started to pick up and put on the clumsily castaway clothing surrounding him. His movement must’ve woken Morgana as he heard her shifting beside him. He started pulling on his clothes, starting with his trousers.
“Merlin,” Morgana mumbled as she turned to face him.
“Mn?” He acknowledged, pulling his tunic on.
“See you again tomorrow?”
Merlin looked at her, gave her a soft smile and a nod, and then planted a kiss on her forehead.
“Oh and you might want to hurry up, Gwen will be here soon,” she yawned.
“Right.”
So the night after the same happened again or, well just about. They’d start off by training, then end up in an embrace only to finish the evening in Morgana’s chambers. This went on for about a week.
On that last morning, however, Morgana woke before Merlin. She turned to look at him and sighed. He looked so peaceful asleep but she had something she needed to say.
“Merlin.” She softly spoke.
He stirs, stretching before opening his eyes.
“Mn.”
“I think, well, I-” Morgana stumbles over her words.
“You think this isn’t working out?” Merlin says.
“Yes, that’s it.”
“Good, because I’ve been thinking the same thing.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“Well because I thought you wanted this.”
Morgana furrowed her brow, “I thought you wanted this. That’s why I didn't say anything before!”
“So let me get this straight. We both continued this physical side to our relationship because we thought it’s what the other wanted?”
“Pretty much.”
Merlin laughed and shook his head. He then got out of bed and once again got dressed. Thankfully last night he decided to leave his clothes in a pile at the side of the bed.
Once fully dressed he turned to Morgana, “You still want to train tomorrow?”
“Yes, just minus the kissing and other bits… oh but I don’t mind a hug once in a while. You do give good hugs.”
“Why thank you, my lady. Now I must run along before Arthur notices my absence.” And with that, he left
Not too long after Merlin had left, Gwen arrived.
“Was that Merlin I just saw leaving?”
Morgana froze before thinking of some sort of lie.
“He came in to check on me because he heard noises, that’s all.”
Gwen seemed satisfied enough with the answer. But she then asked, “What was he doing here so early though?”
“Arthur got him to stay overnight in the castle.”
“Ah.”
“So what do I have to look forward to today?”
And that was the last that was spoken about Merlin’s overnight stays in Morgana’s room. Well, it would have been the last of it. However, life never turns out how we want it.