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“Hey, Sammy. How was school?” Dean calls from the kitchen when he hears the door shut instead of slam, and the fact that John Winchester will probably be at the bar until it closes.
“I had science today, which was awesome. We learned about different types of cells! Did you get the make-up for our costumes?” Sam calls happily from the front of their small apartment and Dean can hear his backpack hitting the floor.
“Yeah, you said you wanted to be a clown, right?” Dean teases, laughing when he hears Sam’s loud objection. His laughter stops the moment he hears another laugh besides his own ringing through their paper-thin walls. He grabs a knife and backs away from the spaghetti and meatballs he’d been preparing for dinner.
“Hey, who is that?” He tries to keep his voice firm and confident, but his hand shakes around the knife.
“Oh, Castiel is here too, he said he had some notes for you since you missed class,” Sam says, finally popping around the corner. “Are you feeling better today?”
His brother motions to the bruises and cuts littering his face and body. Dean smiles and ruffles his brother’s hair even as his blood runs cold at the mention of company, especially Cas. He sets the knife back on the counter and tries to mentally prepare himself.
Sam thinks he got beat up for picking a fight after school, but Cas is smart enough to know that it’s a lie. Dean talks a big game and will use his fists if he has to, but if can talk his way out, he will. He didn’t get into fights with other kids, he got into fights dragging his father home from the bar. He got into fights when walked into their apartment at night carrying a bag of eyeliner, eyeshadow, and face paint. It didn’t matter to John that it was for a Halloween costume, just like it didn’t matter to him that Dean had never gone out with a boy.
“Hello, Dean,” Cas greets, smiling warmly before it fades as his classmate takes in the mess John Winchester made of his son’s face.
“Heya, Cas. Thanks for bringing those notes over,” he grits out, daring the other boy to say something put his appearance.
“You’re welcome,” Cas nods, understanding filling his blue eyes. He turns to Sam, “So, what are you dressing up as?”
“We’re going as scarecrows because all we needed to buy was make-up and hats! We already have jeans, boots, and flannels and Dean found some really cool cowboy hats at the second-hand shop so all we need was the make-up,” Sam beams up at Cas, “Do you wanna see the hats? I can go grab them?”
“That sounds like a great idea, I’d love to see them,” Cas says, smiling as Sam scampers away toward the room they share, and Dean’s softens a bit more towards him.
He has quite a few classes with Castiel Novak, but he wouldn’t really consider them friends. Dean makes it a point not to make friends; he knows that they’ll be moving on at the end of the year. But Cas has seemed pretty determined to get close to Dean. Bringing him notes and study guides whenever he misses class (which is as frequently as he can without a truancy officer being involved), walking Sam home from middle school and staying with him when Dean works, sitting with Dean at lunch and insisting on trading parts of his gourmet lunch for Dean’s scraps. And he never asks Dean for anything in return.
It weirds Dean out, everyone wants something and nothing is ever free, so he keeps his distance. But he can feel his resolve chipping away with each smile, each thoughtful action, each understanding look, and that more than anything scares him the most. “That’s why you didn’t come to school today.” It’s not a question and Dean doesn’t try to deny it.
“Figured it wouldn’t look as bad after the weekend,” Dean shrugs, going back to dinner preparation and wincing as he pulls at a bruise on his ribs. He can feel Cas’ eyes on him, cataloging and extrapolating from his every move and word. No matter how he tries, Dean can’t hide anything from Cas.
“Look! Aren’t they cool! We got a third one for my dad, just in case he wants to come trick-or-treating with us, but I don’t think he is, right Dean?” Dean’s glad his back is toward Sam and he bites his lip for the few seconds it takes to regain control of his emotions.
“Yeah, sorry Sam. He can’t make it tonight. But we’re gonna have a great time with just us! I’m just finishing up dinner and then we can get into our costumes,” Dean smiles at Sam.
“Awesome! Cas do you want to stay for dinner?” Sam gives the dark-haired boy his best puppy dog eyes.
“That’s a very sweet offer, Sam, but I’m sure Dean wasn’t expecting a third mouth to feed, and I wouldn’t want to overstep my welcome.”
Puppy dog eyes turn to bore into Dean even as Dean is already saying, “It’s just spaghetti and frozen meatballs, but that’s okay with you, you’re more than welcome to stay for dinner.”
“Thank you, I’d love to have dinner with you,” Cas says, taking a seat next to Sam as Dean puts the bowls of pasta, meatballs, and sauce on the table.
Dean ignores the extra beat of his heart when he sits next to Cas and their legs accidentally brush. It’s much harder to ignore the smile Cas gives him at the contact. For years he’s been able to lock down and hide away his attraction towards guys, but something about Cas rips open that box every time. Dean feels it, but never acts on it. Not only would his father kill him if he ever found out, but Cas is so far out of Dean’s league. Cas is the top of their class, dangerously handsome, and from a wealthy family. Dean is barely squeezing by, constantly covered in bruises, and practically the sole breadwinner for their family with his part-time jobs.
“What’re y'gon be’fr Ha'ween?” Sam’s words are barely decipherable through a mouthful of pasta, but somehow Cas understands the question.
“Oh, my family doesn’t really celebrate Halloween, so I guess I’m not really planning on going as anything,” Cas shrugs, but Dean thinks he looks just the tiniest bit sad.
“You can come with us. You can wear the third hat, it’ll be perfect!” Dean starts choking on a meatball.
“Sam, thank you for the invitation, but I’m not really dressed to be a scarecrow,” Cas gestures at his white button-up and khaki pants before giving Dean, who’s still choking, an odd look. He reaches over and pats Dean’s back, which only serves to give his lungs another reason to rebel against their normal function, but Dean eventually regains control of his lungs.
“You can borrow some of Dean’s stuff, he’s got plenty of flannels,” Sam cajoles before innocently adding, “Plus Dean never gets to do anything with friends since he’s always working.”
Dean glares at his little brother. He should have seen this coming, but sometimes even he gets fooled by Sam’s innocent act. He’s thinking about the best way to rescind the offer when Cas pipes up.
“If Dean doesn’t mind me borrowing his clothes, then I’d be honored. Although, it’ll be my first time, so you’ll have to teach me how it’s done,” Cas turns hopeful eyes on Dean and Dean knows he’s a goner. He can fool himself all he wants, but there’s no way he can refuse Cas anything.
Plus, he reasons, this will be a great way to repay him for everything he’s done.
“Sam, we are really going to have to work on your manners, but sure, why not?” It’s immediately worth it when Sam bounds off his chair to give Dean a huge hug.
“This is going to be the most epic Halloween ever!” Sam shouts before surprising Dean by saying, “Dean, I’ll do the dishes while you find Cas some clothes.”
Dean leads Cas out of the small kitchen and into the small room he shares with Sam. He feels heat lick at his neck and ears as he thinks about how the threadbare blankets and secondhand furniture look to someone used to much finer things. He scans his drawer for his good jeans, the ones that don’t have any holes in them yet, and a decently clean flannel.
“Here, you can try these on. Can’t promise they’ll fit, but it’s the best I can do.” “Thank you, I’m sure they’ll be great,” Cas says, setting the offered clothes on the bed before beginning to unbutton his shirt.
Blood rushes north and south through Dean’s body and hastily excuses himself to go help Sam before he can really embarrass himself.
“You like him, don’t you?” Sam announces as Dean sidles up to him at the sink and Dean nearly drops the plate he picked up to dry.
“Wha– What? Why would I? Cas? Uh, why would you think that I like Cas?” Dean splutters, wondering if he would have been safer trying to fight off a boner while Cas undressed.
“Uh, because he’s literally the only person you talk about from school? He’s the only one you trust to watch me. Oh, and you blush whenever he looks at you for too long. So, are you two gonna date? I won’t tell Dad.”
“Look, Sam, it’s not that easy. If Dad ever found out …” Dean shudders, but goes on, “Besides, it’s kind of a two-person thing, you know?”
“But he likes you, so it is a ‘two-person thing.’” Dean stares at his younger brother in disbelief. “You didn’t know? Dean, come on. He brings you notes from class and he offers to walk me home and stay with me when you have to work. You think he’s doing that just because he’s a good friend? No. Plus he’s always staring at you and laughing at your dumb jokes. If that’s not love I don’t know what is.”
Dean almost lets himself believe it for a full second before he remembers that his brother is thirteen and doesn’t have a clue about love and dating.
“Well? The jeans are a bit snug, but I think they work,” Cas calls somewhat nervously from behind them. Dean turns and his soul departs his body. Cas is devastatingly handsome on a good day with his preppy clothes, tamed dark curls, and piercing blue eyes, but he looks ten times better with his hair a mess in loose flannel and jeans that hug his hips and butt.
“Wow, you look perfect Cas! Doesn’t he look perfect, Dean?” Sam nudges him and Dean vows to steal all the good candy from his bag in retaliation.
“Yeah, you look … great.” Dean thinks he might see a hint of pink on Cas’ cheeks, but convinces himself it’s the dim lighting of the apartment
“Okay, I’ll get the make-up out while you get changed.” Dean snaps his drying towel at Sam and the kid shrieks as he races away.
“You can practice on me if you want.” Cas takes a seat at the table as Dean unloads his supplies onto the table.
“I don’t know if you want that, I have no idea what I’m doing with any of this. All I’ve got is a few reference photos I found online and a prayer that it can’t be as hard as it looks,” Dean admits, rubbing his neck nervously.
“Oh! Do you want me to try? My sister Anna is obsessed with make-up, she uses me as her canvas whenever she can, so I’ve picked up a few tips and tricks,” Cas offers, looking at the reference photos Dean pulls up on his phone, “I can probably get something close to that.”
“Uh sure, that would be awesome, if you don’t mind. Don’t worry if it doesn’t turn out well, I know my face is kinda ugly right now.”
“Dean, I don’t think you could be ugly if you tried,” Cas says softly, opening the eyeshadow palate. Dean is too stunned to respond, Sam’s earlier words bouncing around dangerously in his brain. Cas holds his chin gently as he dabs on color to Dean’s eyes and cheeks.
“Uh, I didn’t know you had siblings,” Dean blurts when Cas, who’s moved on to face paint, stands between Dean’s legs to get closer to his face.
“Oh, yeah there’s a bunch of us. Michael, Lucifer, and Gabriel are my older brothers and Anna is my older sister. I’m the baby of the family,” Cas tells him, graciously not pointing out the fact that Dean never asked about his family before.
“Wow, I can’t imagine that. It’s hard enough with Sam sometimes. Do you all get along?” Dean has to ask another question otherwise he’ll focus too much on how close Cas’ face has gotten as he feels stitches being painted onto his mouth.
“No, Michael and Lucifer are both great big bags of dicks. Gabe can go either way depending on whether or not he’s had his sugar fix. Anna is a sweetheart and gets along with everyone. Sam reminds me very much of her, actually. Okay, I think you’re done. Tell me if you hate it, okay?” Cas pulls back and Dean kind of misses his warmth.
He keeps his expectations low as he pulls open the camera on his phone. His jaw drops when he sees his face. The bruises are nearly invisible, covered by painted patches and neutral eyeshadow. He has a patch on his nose and a large smile made out of stitches as well.
“You’re a miracle worker, Cas. This looks incredible!” The breath that hadn’t quite returned to his body from seeing Cas’ work, was stolen again when he met Cas’ proud eyes.
“Me next!” Sam charges over, conveniently only barging in once Dean’s intimate make-over is finished.
Cas does just as good a job with Sam and himself and soon the trio are ready to head out.
They spend several hours going from house to house, laughing at the decorations and eating candy along the way. It’s the most fun Dean’s had all year and the only time he feels awkward is when a sweet elderly lady mistakes Cas for his boyfriend, but it’s quickly chased away by the fact that Cas makes no effort to correct her.
By the time they head for home, the pillowcases they used for bags are heavy and Dean is carrying a practically comatose Sam. He doesn’t feel the weight though, not when Cas casually slips his hand into Dean’s as they make their way back in the dark.
“Thanks for coming with us, it really meant a lot to Sam and I actually had a lot of fun,” Dean admits once he has Sam mostly cleaned up and tucked into bed.
“I’m glad, you deserve a little fun and had a great time as well,” Cas shyly reaches for Dean’s hand, slow enough that Dean could pull away. Dean doesn’t though, he’s tired of being alone, tired of hiding himself.
“Cas, do you like me?” Dean blurts the question Sam set rattling around in his brain, exhaustion demolishing his filter. “Like, as a boyfriend?”
“Oh! I thought that was kind of obvious,” Cas smirks, holding up their entwined hands before getting serious, “but, yes. It started as a crush when you walked into class and glared at me with those gorgeous green eyes. But it kind of grew into something more as I saw how hard you work for Sam, how kind you are when you think no one’s looking, and how you swallow your pride and let me help you in little ways. You are the strongest, most beautiful person I know. I think I just might be in love with you, Dean Winchester.”
“Oh.”
“I don’t expect you to feel the same way, and please feel free to stop me at any point if do anything to make you feel uncomfortable; you owe me nothing. I’m just happy to be around you, to be given the chance to know the real you.”
Dean doesn’t think about the consequences, doesn’t worry about what will happen when his dad finds out or how they’ll make it work long distance if John decides to move them again. All he cares about is that he kisses Cas. Right now. He somehow ends up straddling Cas before pulling him into a deep kiss.
“Dean, do you like me?” Cas breathlessly mimics Dean’s earlier question when they come up for air.
“I thought that was kind of obvious,” Dean continues the mimic game, drawing Cas into another kiss. “You know, I was too scared to admit it before, even to myself, but I think I just might be in love with you too, Cas.”
Cas beams up at him when Dean pulls away before he breaks out into a full-body laugh. Dean has a moment of panic before he joins in when he sees the black and orange smears the forgotten makeup has left on their faces from their impromptu make-out session. They wash off and Cas cuddles into Dean’s side as they throw on a scary movie.
Dean wouldn’t be able to recall a single thing about the movie if his life depended on it. Not when Cas’ hand is still clutching his own, not when he tucks his head into Dean’s shoulder after every jump scare, not when Cas gives up watching the movie and moves on to peppering Dean’s neck and jaw with kisses.
And it doesn’t matter when John stumbles in hours after Cas finally says goodbye. Every hateful word and half-hearted swing glance right off him tonight as he wrestles his Dad into bed to sleep off the alcohol. Nothing can touch him when he still has the ghost of his boyfriend’s kiss lingering on his lips and skin. No problem seems too large now that he knows Cas will be facing it with him.
Dean crawls into bed, looking forward to tomorrow, to the future, for the first time he can remember.
Sam was right, this was the most epic Halloween ever.