Chapter Text
This wasn’t supposed to happen.
Tanjiro was breathing heavily, chest rising up and down erratically. This wasn’t supposed to happen. They were meant to be together, to be alive together, not— not this.
Tanjiro staggered forward, steps uncoordinated. He payed no mind to the shouts around him. They were just muffled noises. Unimportant. Insignificant. Not like them.
Tanjiro fell to his knees, gasping for breath. Salty tracks of tears littered his face, nose running with snot as he shouted at the sky above. His arms curled around two cooling bodies, bodies that were once his friends. His family.
“Inosuke, Zenitsu,” Tanjiro managed out. The words came out garbled before he screamed again. He couldn’t breathe. His heart felt like it was being squeezed to death. Like a snake had wrapped around it and was making sure nothing was left. He gripped their clothes, shaking. He felt blood gushing out of his wounds that hadn’t healed before he’d been turned back.
Shame and despair gripped at Tanjiro again. How could I have done this? It was him, him who had succumbed to becoming a demon. Him, who had dealt the blows that killed his brothers. Because yes, in the time they’d known each other Zenitsu and Inosuke had managed to worm their way into the depths of his heart. Alongside Nezuko, they had become a reason to live, to fight.
Tanjiro looked down at the two bodies in his arms. Inosuke’s boar mask had slipped off, revealing his face. But that only made it worse to look at. Zenitsu was no better. Yellow hair splayed in all directions. And their eyes oh their eyes. They were soulless. So, so, empty. Tanjiro brought them closer to him. He could smell the iron wafting off like waves off of them.
The gaping hole in Zenitsu’s stomach, and were those guts spilling out of him. The complete lack of arms on Inosuke. Tanjiro had to turn away once he saw the bone sticking out of where his arms should be. But it was too late. The damage was done, completely irreversible. Their images burned Tanjiro’s retinas.
Tanjiro felt two hands on his shoulders. He only sobbed harder. This pain, and wasn’t that a crude way of describing it? This monster was clawing from the inside of him, squeezing his head together, pulling at every string. It was somehow better and worse than when he lost his family.
Worse in the way that this was all his fault. That there was no one else to blame. He felt like he had failed them, Inosuke and Zenitsu, somehow.
But better, because Tanjiro knew, he could feel the life slipping out of him. He didn’t have much time to live. His wounds were to fatal for that. Tanjiro felt a hope that he’d finally see his family again. That he’d be able to introduce Zenitsu and Inosuke to them. They’d welcome the two of them with open arms, he just knew it.
His siblings would play with them with their boundless energy. And his mother, Tanjiro felt a cry rip through his throat, oh his mother. She’d fuss over them and shower them with all her love like they were her own.
Tanjiro felt something drip down his shoulder. He looked up and saw Nezuko, one hand over her mouth, one hand around him. Endless tears spilt from her eyes. Oh Nezuko… Tanjiro wrapped one arm around her. He leaned into her, relishing in the warmth emitting from her. He hadn’t felt that in so long, not since she’d become a demon.
“N-Nezuko,” Tanjiro coughed out. “Y-you need t-to live. Okay? Can you d-do that for me?”
Nezuko’s shoulder’s only shook more violently. She was sobbing openly now, both arms around Tanjiro. Tanjiro spit out some more blood before continueing.
“Y-you have so much t-to live for. Live. For e-everyone we lost. Make i-it count.”
Tanjiro felt Nezuko nodding through her anguished cries. He smiled, eyes glistening. He looked back at the two people in his arms sadly. Even though he’d meet them soon, he couldn’t help but wish, selfishly, that they’d had more time. He wasn’t blind. He knew that they’d have been able to do so much together if they had just had more time. He wasn’t blind, he’d seen how well they worked together. He couldn’t explain it. Something had just clicked with these two.
What-ifs played in his head. What if they’d met earlier, what if they’d survived?
What if they’d never met at all?
And wasn’t that a thought? Tanjiro for the life of him couldn’t imagine a life without them. In such a little amount of time, they’d made such an impact on him. On each other.
Tanjiro felt sadness flood his system again. He felt sorrow, regret, misery. But most of all, he felt unfairness. It wasn’t fair. They were so young, too young. Just as Zenitsu had started becoming confident again, just as Inosuke had begun letting them help more.
It was all for nothing. Nothing. What was the point of winning if there was no one left to celebrate? Tanjiro shook that thought out of his head. No, there were people to enjoy it. They’d done this for humanity, for the innocent, for their loved ones.
And yet.
And yet, Tanjiro wants, selfishly, for them to have more time. For once in his life, he allows himself to be selfish. He wishes for more time, he wishes to see them laugh and smile and run just once more. He wishes to see them live, without worrying if there’s another demon around the corner. To not have to fear about one day never coming back from a mission. To not survive but to live.
Because they deserved, all of them. The Hashira who put their entire life into eradicating demons. The slayers who died valiantly so someone else could live on more day. They deserved it.
So when Tanjiro closes his eyes for what he knows is the last time, he doesn’t mind the void that awaits him. He embraces it. He can see them now. His father, his mother, his little siblings. He sees Rengoku-san looking at him with such a proud smile. He feels pure bliss gripping his soul. He walks forward.
But seeing them closer, their smiles look bittersweet. Why, I’m here now. It’s all okay, that demon is gone.
Just before he reaches them he hears a voice whisper in his ear. You’re not done yet little one. We have to fulfill your wish first.
That is all Tanjiro hears before the dark engulfs him once more.