Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

It’s been a little over a week since Cady and Regina finally sat down and talked, after months of watching each other from across the coffee shop. Regina comes back to the cafe, three days a week, just like she said she would. They make small talk now at the counter, Cady asking how work was going and other things, not just asking for her order. Regina starts using her real name again, not Rachel, which confuses the hell out of some of the other baristas.

On Cady’s breaks, she sits at Regina’s booth with her, and the two talk. It’s never really that deep, just about whatever small things they had going on. Regina usually tells her a story about work, or Cady tells her something her mom had done the night before. 

On the days that Regina doesn’t come to the coffee shop, she texts Cady, wishing her a good day in the morning and asking how her day had gone in the evening. It’s nice, Cady thinks, to have someone to talk to regularly other than her mom. Sure, she can always reach out to Damian and Janis if she wants someone to talk to, but… things were different. They avoid talking about their lives too much, for what they felt was a good reason. They’re both wildly successful, Janis as an artist, Damian making his Broadway debut a few years back. Cady is just… here, in Chicago, living with her mom, attending therapy, and working as a barista. It had been especially hard a few years ago, and they eventually ran out of things to talk about. They still call about once a month, getting vaguely caught up in each other’s lives, but it was always very vague. Not a lot of detail. Safer, that way. Less likely to make Cady upset, thinking about what could have been. At least, that's what it feels like to her.

Somehow, it doesn't feel that way with Regina. Regina never tiptoes around the truth, but it’s not braggy, either. She tells Cady about the latest drama she’s dealing with internally at work, or her latest dilemma with designs. Cady is a bit shocked to see just how much can happen in the course of a single week, but she quickly learns that Regina’s job is really stressful. 

Yet, she still made time, three days a week, to spend her mornings sitting and watching Cady, for the last five months, and she's continuing to do it again. It makes Cady’s chest warm, but also makes her stomach twist in knots. It’s sweet, but also terrifying. The reality of their past, despite the long talk they’d had, and the apologies given, is still very present for Cady, and presents itself in the physical reactions her body has to these realizations. She’s on edge for a few hours once she pieces it together, feeling like she was waiting for the other shoe to drop.

But it isn't going to. Regina had been honest with her during their talk. At least, it really seems that way. Regina tells her more stories about the ten year gap between then and now, about short relationships she’s had with other women. Most of them were nothing more than one-night stands, but she mentions a longer-term relationship with a woman named Rebecca in passing, alluding that it hadn’t ended well. Cady doesn’t really push for more information, easily sensing it’s not the most comfortable subject matter for Regina. 

To Cady, it feels like Regina really is trying. Trying to be honest, trying to be authentic, trying to do whatever she can to make up for the past. 

One of those things seems to be getting Cady reconnected with Gretchen and Karen. 

Regina brings up the idea a couple of days before, suggesting the four of them go out to dinner. Cady is interested, but admitted that she didn't have anything fancy to wear, and she knows Regina and her friends tend to have more expensive tastes. 

Regina promises her they’ll pick somewhere on the more casual side, and so Cady agrees. Regina tells her a few hours later, after consulting with Gretchen and Karen (both of whom are thrilled at the idea of seeing Cady again), that they’ve picked out a Chinese-Japanese fusion and hibachi restaurant that errs on the more casual side. She also promises that the three won’t get too dressed up, which Cady hasn't even really asked for, but definitely appreciates. 

That brings Cady to now, a couple of hours before Regina is supposed to pick her up, staring at the options in her tiny closet and feeling very overwhelmed. 

“I really don't think this is a good idea,” Dr. Heron says from the doorway, leaning against the frame. 

“I know, Mom,” Cady sighs. “I’m doing it anyway.” 

“I just don't want you to get hurt.”

“I know. And I appreciate you and love you. You know I do.” Cady sighs again. “But this is Gretchen and Karen.” 

“ And Regina,” Dr. Heron is quick to remind her. 

“I know how you feel about Regina,” Cady tells her, “and you know what I'm going to say back. So why do we keep having the same conversation over and over?” 

“Sweetie…” 

“Mom, please . Just help me pick something out, please ?” Cady's voice is almost small now. 

Dr. Heron looks at her daughter for several long moments, before sighing and stepping towards the closet. “Alright. But I still don't think this is a good idea.” 

“I know,” Cady says, and they leave it at that. 

Regina arrives right on time to pick Cady up, exactly at 6:30pm. She texts Cady a quick Here message, but the redhead is already downstairs waiting for her. 

Cady is a bit shocked to see Regina’s new car. It makes sense that she wouldn't have the same Jeep she did back in high school, especially as a city businesswoman. No, now she has a sleek Lexus, black with leather seats. Regina greets her with a smile as she gets in. 

“Hey,” Regina says as she puts the car in drive. “How was your day?” 

“Good,” Cady replies with a smile of her own. “Slower day at work, which was nice. Then I just came home and got ready for this.” 

“That does sound like a pretty good day. I saw Gretchen and Karen earlier today at work. They’re super excited to see you tonight. They still can't believe how close by you were.” 

“I’m really excited to see them too,” Cady admits. “A little nervous, but it's okay.” 

“It'll be a great time,” Regina tells her. “I promise.”

Cady smiles and relaxes into her seat. “Your car is really nice.”

“Thanks,” Regina says with a grin. “I live close enough to work that I don’t use it often, but it’s handy to have.” 

Cady nods. “Yeah, my mom still has her car but doesn’t use it super often. We’re close enough to campus where she can walk to work most of the time, but it’s useful for, like, grocery shopping and emergencies and stuff.”

“Does your building have a garage?” 

“Oh, God, no. It’s just street parking,” Cady shrugs. “We were lucky enough to get in-unit laundry, but that’s about it.” 

“Hey, that’s no joke. In-unit or bust,” Regina says. 

The conversation is light, gentle, through the rest of the ride. Cady really appreciates the way Regina can just… make a conversation easy, even if there’s heavy tones underneath. She doesn’t ask Cady if she drives (she doesn’t, she never got her license, and never really goes anywhere other than work without her mom), she doesn’t make Cady feel bad for the cramped space she lives in, she doesn’t try to compare their lives. It’s nice. They just talk , back and forth, about literally whatever , and it feels good. 

There’s a little part of Cady that is still waiting for the other shoe to drop. She’s waiting for Regina to snap, or start screaming, or anything , really. But Regina’s been nothing but kind for the last week; hell, the last (nearly) six months, at this point. She has no reason to believe that it’s going to happen, but that little voice in the back of her head won’t shut up . 

It’s a trauma response. She knows this. She spent the better part of the last ten years learning how to move on from what happened in high school and now… now half of the problem is sitting a foot away from her, driving her to dinner with their old friends. Yeah. It’s enough to make Cady’s stomach twist and her heart pound, no matter how much she tries to tell herself that everything is fine .

Because it is. It has to be fine. She has to be fine. She needs this. She needs to be able to actually move past what happened and start to feel like a whole person again. It’s been over ten years since she felt that way. She’s desperate, the pain of the past constantly clawing inside her. 

Despite the turmoil in her brain and in her heart, Cady is doing her very best to just keep the light conversation going with Regina. It’s a skill she mastered a long time ago, a defense mechanism. She hasn’t had to use it much lately, because honestly, she has been doing better. She’s grateful Regina happened to walk into her life now, and not, like, two years ago, or something. She wouldn’t have been ready back then. Regina would have walked into that coffee shop and Cady would have frozen up the way she did when she saw that boy. All of her progress would have unraveled in a second . 

But now, right now, she is okay. She’s doing better. She trusts that Regina is being honest with her. At least, the majority of Cady believes that. She knows it’ll take a long time to get past the trauma response, but that’s okay.

If the last ten years have taught Cady anything, it’s the value of patience in recovery. Nothing happens overnight. 

The restaurant is in a different neighborhood than their apartments and the coffee shop, a bit further away from the university campuses. The restaurant is nice enough to have a valet, which makes Cady a little nervous. 

“I promise, it’s still on the casual side,” Regina assures her when she sees the look on Cady’s face after they’d gotten out of the car and handed the valet the keys. “A lot of places around here have valets, since there’s such little street parking.” 

Cady nods, desperately waiting to believe Regina. She fidgets nervously with the hem of her sweater, unable to fully calm herself. Regina puts a gentle hand on Cady’s shoulder. 

The touch does help ground Cady, who gives a little nod of thanks. “Have you been here before?”

“Once, a couple months ago. Gretch and Kare have been a few times, though. They’re, like, big foodies now. They’re always trying different places.” She smiles softly. “They take me along sometimes, but a lot of it is their date nights.” 

Cady nods again. Gretch and Kare . That’s new. “I’m sure they liked the chance to find a whole bunch of new places in Chicago.”

Regina laughs, leading Cady into the restaurant. “Yes and no. They warmed up to it eventually, but Karen was pretty upset that they wouldn’t get to finish their ‘New York Food Tour’, which they’d been at for nine years. But they weren’t ever gonna actually finish it, you know? New restaurants open and close all the time in big cities.” 

“Yeah, the pizza place down the street from our apartment has been, like, five different places since we moved here. My favorite was when it was a smoothie shop. Those were so good.” 

Regina smiles as they approach the host stand. The host looks up with a grin. “Party of two?”

Regina shakes her head. “No, actually, we have a reservation for four, under the name Karen? The other two might already be here.” 

“Oh, you’re Karen Shetty’s friends! They just got here ten minutes ago, right this way!” 

Cady gives Regina a look. “They know Karen by first and last name?” she whispers as they follow the host.

“We have got to get you back on social media,” Regina laughs. “She’s massive on Instagram. Chicago’s restaurant industry rejoiced when we all moved here.” 

Cady hums. The idea of social media makes her stomach twist in knots, but she doesn’t say anything. It’s not like she’s got much of a life worth sharing, and she definitely doesn’t need help comparing herself to others. 

They follow the host over to a table. Gretchen’s face lights up when she spots them. She hasn’t grown in height much since high school, but she looks incredible . And far more happy than Cady remembers. “Cady!” she exclaims, causing Karen to turn to face them as they approach. 

Karen looks great too. Cady has to remind herself all three of the former Plastics now work for a fashion design company; Regina’s company, at that. Of course they all look like they walked straight out off a runway, even in “more casual” clothes. 

Karen does look happier too, a bit less confused than Cady remembers. She’s got a huge smile on her face, eyes as kind as they’ve always been. Gretchen and Karen stand up, each girl embracing Cady in a big hug. 

“Oh, it’s been so long!” Gretchen exclaims. 

“We’ve missed you so much!” Karen says with a smile. 

“I missed you guys too,” Cady tells them both, and, really, she has. They were always kind to her, even after everything happened. She hasn't forgotten her last day of school, the hugs they shared, and the things they said. They might have been Plastics, but they also cared a whole lot about Cady Heron.

They all sit down, big smiles all around. Their waiter comes over quickly, almost as soon as they’re in their seats, asking what everyone would like to drink. Everyone orders alcohol, except for Cady, who goes last, and just orders a water. 

“You don’t want a drink?” Karen asks, tilting her head slightly in the way Cady remembers well. Gretchen nudges her under the table, but that’s also obvious to Cady. She’s a bit shocked at how well she remembers their little mannerisms, or how little those have changed in ten years. 

Cady shakes her head. “I can’t drink with some of the meds I’m on.” 

“Oh, okay!” Karen replies. 

“Have you been to this place before?” Gretchen asks Cady, quickly trying to shift gears. 

Cady shakes her head. “We don’t really go out much, my mom and I, and if we do, it’s just places in our neighborhood. I haven’t really been in this area much, despite living here for ten years.” 

“You’ll love it,” Gretchen tells her. “Their noodles are to die for.” 

Regina nods. “Whatever you end up getting, also order a side of hibachi noodles. Trust me, you’ll want them.” 

Cady shrugs, opening the menu. “Sure. Sounds good.” The prices make her cringe internally. Sure, she’s got savings and stuff, but still, she’s an hourly barista. If this place was more casual, she’d hate to see the prices at the places her friends considered upscale .

To their credit, most of the other people around them were dressed fairly casually. A few couples were clearly out on date nights and were a bit more dressed up, but she also saw plenty of people in jeans and casual shirts. It definitely wasn’t upscale, even if the prices felt like they were to Cady. 

“Wanna split a boat, babe?” Karen asks, looking up at Gretchen.

“Sure,” Gretchen replies. Cady flips to the sushi portion of the menu, and tries very hard not to react to the prices. Yeah, definitely not something she could justify getting. She flipped back to the entrees, scanning through for some of the lower priced items. 

“Do you know what you’re getting?” Regina asks Cady. 

Cady shrugs. “I’m torn between the Pad Thai or the fried rice.” Both of those look like some of the cheapest entrees, but they both also do sound really good.

“Oh, the Pad Thai is so good,” Karen tells her. “I had it the first time we came here. Delish .” 

Cady smiles and closes her menu. “Sounds like I’m going with the Pad Thai.” She looks at Regina. “What about you?” 

“I was looking at the special rolls, but I don’t know. Not really feeling sushi. Maybe the mango chicken.” 

“Oh, that sounds good ,” Gretchen says, reading the menu. “Oh, they also have mango shrimp!” 

“I do love shrimp,” Regina hums. “I’m kinda picky with it though. Like, it has to be good shrimp, you know?”

Cady nods, but she doesn’t really know. Sure, she knows the difference between shrimp that’s gone bad and shrimp that’s safe to eat, but she has no idea what classifies as good shrimp. 

Their waiter returns with their drinks, and takes their orders. Gretchen ends up getting a dumpling appetizer for the table (“You have to try at least one! They’re so good!”), before they all place their orders, Regina deciding against the shrimp risk and going with the mango chicken. The waiter hurries off, and Cady notices he’s acting a little… nervous. 

Right, Karen’s big on social media for her foodie posts, or whatever. They know her by name here. They’re probably looking to impress her. 

“So, how long have you been in Chicago?” Gretchen asks Cady, stirring her drink with her straw. 

“Oh, pretty much since I dropped out,” Cady shrugs. She notices the way Gretchen tenses up when she mentions it. She waves her hand. “Don’t worry about it. It happened, it’s my life, I don’t mind talking about it.”

Gretchen relaxes. “Oh, okay. I just didn’t want to… I don’t know, say something wrong or whatever.” 

Cady waves her hand again. “Promise, I do not mind and it does not bother me. But, yeah, my mom got a job out at UChicago after we left Evanston and we’ve been here since. It really worked out for me, honestly. Being a teenage dropout living in Chicago opened up a bunch of programs and stuff for Chicago residents to get my mental health on track. Which I did! And then I got my GED a few years back, finally got a job, and now I’ve just been doing that for a few years.” She’s both a little shocked Regina didn’t tell them this already, but also relieved she didn’t. She can tell by the look in Karen’s eyes, especially, that all of this is new information to them. 

“Oh, I’m so glad!” Gretchen smiles. “Regina said you work in a coffee shop?” 

Cady nods. “Yeah, near campus. The bosses are great and it keeps me busy, so I’m doing pretty well there.” 

“A good boss can make or break a job,” Karen nods, very seriously, before looking at Regina. “We have the best boss!” 

“I told you, Kare, please stop calling me your boss,” Regina sighs, sipping her drink. “It makes me feel weird .” 

“I mean, isn’t it true though?” Cady asks. “At least, from what you’ve told me.” 

“ Technically ,” Regina huffs. “Doesn’t mean that I love the reminder. Makes me feel like I’m in high school again.” 

“Regina’s way better than she was in high school,” Gretchen insists. “No offense, Regina.” 

Regina laughs. “No, no, feel free to offend. I was a shitty person. But hey, eight years of therapy does wonders .” 

“Cheers to that,” Cady chuckles, sipping her water.

“You know what? You’re right.” Regina raises up her drink. “Cheers to therapy.” 

Cady shakes her head with a smile, raising up her water. “Cheers to therapy.”

Karen and Gretchen do the same, Karen far more enthusiastic than Gretchen. The latter of the pair still seems nervous, like they’ve branched into dangerous territory. Cady decides to redirect, asking the pair, “So, Regina tells me you guys are together now.” 

Karen lights up like a Christmas tree. “Yes! Gretch and I celebrated our four year anniversary a couple months ago.” 

Gretchen nods, reaching over and taking Karen’s hand. “We sure did!” 

“There’s gotta be a great story here,” Cady says, leaning back in her seat. 

“Well, I mean, we technically started dating four years ago, but like, it started way before that,” Karen begins, before Gretchen elbows her slightly.

“Kare, she doesn’t need to know all that…”

“They were hooking up as early as senior year of high school,” Regina stage-whispers to Cady, who nearly chokes on her water. 

“No way ,” Cady says, at the exact same time Gretchen exclaims, “ Regina! We were not !” 

Regina gives Gretchen a pointed look. “Then how would you describe what I walked in on?” 

Gretchen is quiet for a moment. “Making out,” she mutters. 

“We did that a lot,” Karen supplies helpfully. Gretchen pinches the bridge of her nose and sighs. 

Cady bursts into a fit of giggles, unable to control herself. “Oh my God, I missed you guys.” She's grinning really wide now, the biggest she's smiled in months, maybe even years. 

Gretchen, despite her embarrassment, smiles back. “We missed you too, Cady.” 

Between the three former Plastics, they eventually manage to weave the tale of how Gretchen and Karen finally got together. They did start making out a lot in high school, during their senior year, when all three of them had gotten a lot more subdued . 

“Things were… different, after you left,” Regina admits. “We didn't talk about it that year, but I was finally starting to really process… what I'd done, you know? And I wanted to be better.” 

“And she was better,” Gretchen tells Cady. “It took a few more years to really get to a place where I’d describe her as mostly good- ”

“Hey!”

“-but,” Gretchen continued, ignoring Regina’s outburst, “she got there, and we were all very proud of her when she did.” She gives Regina a pointed look. Regina smiles and rolls her eyes, but there's no bite. It's playful. There's no animosity left. 

It's refreshing, to Cady, who, years ago, had wondered if Gretchen and Karen would ever be able to free themselves from the clutches of Regina George. In a way, they hadn't, but they weren't really in her clutches anymore. They were actually all friends now, and from what it seemed, good for each other. 

The appetizer comes, and they pause the story for Karen, who needs to take pictures of the food. Gretchen makes Cady try a dumpling, and, yeah, they are really good, and Gretchen insists she take another one. There's only five dumplings total (which seems criminal to Cady, given the cost), so she doesn't want to at first, but then they all insist, so she finally does. 

The story continues on, how all three girls went to NYU together and shared a triple dorm. How living with Regina was a lot , which even Regina would admit, and how Gretchen and Karen would sometimes stay in B&Bs for a couple of nights to just get away from Regina for a little bit. 

“My bitchiness founded their relationship, so, they should be thanking me, honestly,” Regina says. She jumps when someone kicks her under the table. “Damn, Gretch, I didn't know your legs reached that far.” 

“No, no, that was me,” Karen says with a smile, not looking up from her phone. The whole process of Instagramming a meal is much more involved than Cady thought. 

Regina cackles, grinning at Cady. “I know it's time to reel it in when Karen’s kicking me under the table,” she says in another stage whisper. 

Cady laughs. She likes Regina’s playful way of filling her in, making sure she's included. It's very Regina, but, like, in a good way. Something she never thought she'd be able to say.

Gretchen finally continues the story. How things escalated in the B&Bs, but it took them several more years to actually talk about their feelings. How, realistically, they were basically dating without ever putting a label on it. How they spent all of their time together, never even considering the idea of anyone else, once they'd ended up in this dynamic. 

“Then one day, Regina snapped,” Gretchen laughed. “Told us to get our heads out of our asses and talk about our damn feelings.” 

Regina chuckles. “Yeah, that sums it up. I was so tired of watching them make heart eyes at each other without ever saying anything.” Her voice drops to the stage whisper again. “They still make heart eyes at each other. They're just normal about it now.” 

“We are far from normal,” Karen says, just as the food arrives. She pauses again, taking pictures of not only the sushi boat, but Cady and Regina’s meals too. When she's done taking pictures, she says, “Anyways, yeah. We’ve been in love ever since!” without even looking up from her phone, hard at work again. 

“Wow,” Cady grins. “That's a really cute story, honestly. I'm so glad it worked out for you guys.” 

“Me too,” Gretchen says, looking at Karen, who's just put her phone down. They smile at each other, before Karen turns to beam at the other two. 

“Let's eat!” 

The Pad Thai is really good. It's better than the stuff from the place near Cady’s apartment that her and her mom order takeout from a few times a month. She can understand why it costs a more than the takeout. It's worth it. The hibachi noodles, which her friends had insisted she get, are absolutely divine . 

Cady finds herself finishing all of her food, not realizing until it's all gone. It shocks her a bit. She's eaten smaller meals since high school. Between her depression itself and the eventual cocktail of various medications she took each day to combat said depression, Cady's appetite was pretty much shot. She wasn't sure the last time she ate a full portion of anything from a restaurant without ending up with leftovers. 

“What did you think?” Karen asks, once they're all done. She's got her phone in hand.

“It was so good ,” Cady says with a grin. “Like, seriously. I didn't realize how much I'd had until it was all gone. I don't know the last time I did that.” 

“...ate a full meal?” Regina’s voice is immediately concerned. 

“One that sized? That plate was huge!” Cady exclaims. 

The other three exchange looks. It wasn't really that big of a plate. 

Cady just shakes her head. “My meds suppress my appetite as one of the side effects. I don't really eat that much. But that was so good , it beat antidepressants . Put that in your review thingy.” 

Karen blinks. “I’ll think on that.” 

“I'm glad you liked it!” Gretchen says, trying to shift away from the uncomfortable air that filled the table. “What about you, G?” 

“Mine was really good too,” Regina replies. “Definitely a good choice with the chicken.” 

“Noted!” Karen taps away on her phone. “Oh, Cady, do you want me to tag you in the post? I don't have to, but I usually tag Gina and Gretch, soooo….” 

Cady shakes her head. “Nah, I deleted my Instagram years ago.” 

Karen looks up, tilting her head. “Really? I could have sworn I’ve seen your name…” she looks back down, tapping on her phone again. “Look, see, right here! Cady Heron!” 

She shows her phone to Cady, who reads the username at the top screen. “That says Camy Herod.” The account itself is empty, aside from a username and display name, so there's no other signs of the account owner for Karen to go off of. 

Karen yanks her phone back. “No, no way. She squints, before showing her phone to Gretchen. 

“Sorry, babe. She's right. That’s not her name.” 

Karen sighs, putting her phone down. “ Stupid -” she begins, but both Regina and Gretchen cut her off at the same time. 

“You are not stupid!”

“Stupid Instagram ,” Karen repeats, giving them both a look. “I know better than to say that about myself around you two.”

“You better not be saying it when we aren't around either,” Regina says pointedly. 

Karen sighs. “I don't .” She turns to Cady, who's looking pretty confused. “I found out I have dyslexia in college. I use a special font on my phone so I don't mix up my letters, but it doesn't work in all apps. Like Instagram.” 

“We have been campaigning for Instagram to add a dyslexia-friendly font option for two years now,” Gretchen informs Cady. “We’re finally starting to get some traction with it.” 

Cady nods. “That makes sense. The dyslexia, I mean. I assumed that, back then, but I didn't want to say anything, because I thought everyone knew. Like, literally, it was the first thing I learned about you. Damian introduced you by telling me he once saw you put a d in the word orange. ” 

“ Ds and G s do get mixed up easily,” Karen sighs, and then shakes her head. “Apparently my teachers wanted me to get tested in elementary school, but my parents said no.” 

“Why?” Cady asks, stunned. 

“I don’t really know,” Karen shrugs. “We never really talked about it.” 

“Karen's parents aren't, um, the most understanding of our relationship,” Gretchen admits. “We don't really talk to them often.” 

Cady frowns. “I'm so sorry. That sucks.”

Karen shrugs again. “Their loss. I'm happy.” She takes Gretchen’s hand and squeezes it. “And I'm also dyslexic!” 

Regina laughs. “That she is. But she's got such amazing and creative ways to get around the barriers. Like, she writes all her captions in her notes app, where she can use the right font, and then just copies and pastes it into Instagram when she's sure there's no errors. That's genius!” Cady notices the way Regina smiles at her friend, genuinely so proud of her. 

Karen smiles back. “Yeah! I have a bunch of little workarounds like that! The goal is to not have to use them, one day, when I can actually use the font everywhere.” She looks back down at her phone, typing away again. “I'm glad I asked before tagging you. Poor Camy.” 

“Poor Camy,” Regina repeats, chuckling to herself. 

The check comes, and Cady’s heart leaps into her chest. Before she can move to even look at it, Regina hands the waiter her card immediately. “Put it all on this,” she says. 

“I can, um, Venmo you,” Cady says after the waiter walks away. “My coworkers taught me how to use that one.”

Regina shakes her head. “No, my treat. For all of you.” 

“If you're sure…”

Regina nods, smiling around the table, lingering on Cady for a bit longer than the others. “I'm just really, really happy to have all of us together again.” 

Cady smiles back. “Yeah. Me too.” 

“We have to do this more often,” Gretchen says, reaching a hand across the table to Cady. 

Cady takes it, and smiles at Gretchen. “I’d love that. Genuinely. I really, really missed you guys.” 

“I've got a reservation on Saturday for brunch I could definitely add to, if you wanna come,” Karen offers. “It's not somewhere we’ve tried yet, but I've heard good things!”

Cady shakes her head. “I work Saturdays.” 

“ Every Saturday?” Regina asks. 

Cady nods. “Sundays and Thursdays are my days off.” 

Regina frowns. “That blows.”

Cady shrugs. “I don't mind it. Saturdays are usually slower, since people don't have classes or work for the most part. It's usually a chill shift. Besides, I like having Thursdays off. Those are therapy days. Would much rather relax than deal with the general public on therapy days.”

“We’ll have to swing by on a Saturday sometime,” Gretchen says, trying to quickly move past the concept of a whole day being dedicated to therapy. 

“She makes a mean flat white,” Regina stage whispers across the table, and Cady finds herself laughing again. 

It's incredible, really, how at ease she's managed to be throughout dinner. It's been ages since she felt this way. She's not even sure that she ever felt this relaxed with this particular group of people before. Back then, before it all went to hell, hanging out with the Plastics was a marathon of social stamina. Cady had always been a bit out of place and awkward, even back then, and their high school hangouts usually left her feeling drained. 

Tonight, however, she was happy, happier than she had been in a long, long time. 

Chapter Text

Janis ‘Imi'ike loves her morning routine. 

She gets up around the same time every morning, sometimes a little later on the weekends. She gets up, uses the bathroom, showers, eats her favorite quick breakfast, scrolls social media, brushes her teeth, and picks out a project to work on for the day. It's a whole ritual, and she takes it very seriously. 

She isn't a huge fan of when something disrupts her ritual. Damian knows better than to call her before a certain time, and she never schedules anything for early in the mornings. 

Sometimes, however, the disruptions happen anyway. 

Today, it happens as she scrolls through social media. She's already browsed a bit on her art account, liking work from other artists she follows over there. Now she's switched over to her personal, which shows her an amalgamation of posts from people she went to high school and college with, as well as other artists she's met in the industry over the years. She's scrolling, liking, scrolling, liking, scrolling, when suddenly, a post from Karen Shetty , of all people, stops her in her tracks. 

Karen Shetty . Now, that's not someone she's thought about in a while. She sees her posts pop up from time to time on her feed. It comes as no surprise to Janis that all three of the Plastics blew up on Instagram during college. They had a lot of followers even back in high school, but last she’d seen of Regina George’s blocked account, that number had grown well into the millions. 

Janis still follows Gretchen and Karen, despite it all. She remembers the time after Aaron's death all too well, and although it was a living nightmare , she knows Gretchen and Karen weren't to blame for any of it. She remembers the time Gretchen begged her to know how Cady was doing, the genuine concern she expressed and openly admitting that Regina had gone too far. She remembers Cady's last day of school, and how much all five of them cried that day. She remembers how long Karen and Gretchen hugged Cady for, and the soft looks the pair gave Damian and Janis after Cady was gone. 

Janis likes the two of them. She’d followed them on Instagram the summer after high school ended, when Karen came up in her recommendeds. She interacts with their posts from time to time, and had been shocked to learn that the Plastics all ended up in New York City too. She had considered reaching out a few times during college, but decided against it, since Regina’s (still blocked) account was tagged in most of their posts. She had congratulated them on their relationship when they went public a few years back. That had been a twist she hadn't expected, especially given their constant proximity to Regina. 

Janis might have grown a soft spot for Gretchen and Karen, but as far as Janis was concerned, Regina George still is and always will be public enemy number one . 

Which is why it completely stops Janis in her tracks, when in the background of Karen’s latest food picture, she sees Regina sitting next to someone Janis hasn't seen a picture of in a very, very long time. At least, she thinks it's that someone. The main focus of the picture is of a sushi boat, but there's an arm in the background wearing a bracelet she’s pretty sure she recognizes. 

There's more than one photo in the post, so Janis swipes. There's more pictures of food, but in the background of a Pad Thai dish, she can see both arms of the person, and yeah, there's the bracelet Janis made her years ago . 

Immediately, Janis closes the app and calls Damian, needing him to see this immediately . 

Damian, to his credit, picks up on the second ring. “Hey, girl! I'm shocked to see you call this early!” 

“Have you seen Karen Shetty’s latest Instagram post?” Janis immediately asks.

“What happened to hello? Good morning? How are you?”

“Hello, good morning, how are you?” Janis huffs, saying it as fast as she can. “Have you seen the post?” 

“I don't think so,” Damian replies. “Lemme check. I'm putting you on speaker.”

“Is Matt there?” Janis asks. 

“He might be,” Damian says in a way that Janis knows he's got that stupid grin on his face, just as another male voice says, “Hi Janis!”

Janis laughs. “Hey, Matt. Sorry to disturb you guys this early. I just need Damian to see this and tell me I'm not going crazy.”

“Janis, babygirl, you went crazy a long time ago,” Damian tells her. 

“Just look at the post!” 

“I'm on her profile, jeez! The sushi one? What's so - oh my God .”

“ Yeah !” Janis nearly yells. “Is that Caddy sitting next to Regina fucking George ?” 

“I think it is. Oh my God. What ?” Damian begins to read the caption aloud. “ Had a wonderful time and a delicious meal at @BlossomFusion last night with my girls @GretchenWieners @ReginaGeorge and an old friend!! No better way to catch up than with some delicious dumplings and sushi! The sushi boat was 🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟 out of 🐟🐟🐟🐟🐟! Very fresh and… ” Damian trails off a bit. “Blah blah blah, food reviews… Oh, here we go! Our friend got the Pad Thai and said it was so good, she didn't have any left to take home! That's some high praise from her! ” Damian’s eyes scan the rest of the ridiculously long caption, which details all the food everyone ate. He finally reads aloud the last few lines. “ It's always so nice to catch up with old friends with a great meal! Thanks to @BlossomFusion for making this ten year reunion so special! ” 

“Has it really been ten years?” Janis asks. 

“I guess so. Yeah, actually. That adds up. Jesus,” Damian sighs. “Wait, what the fuck ? Why is Cady out to dinner with Regina ? Is she okay?” 

Janis throws her hand in the air. “That's what I'm saying! Do you think she stopped taking her meds or something?” 

“I hope not, Jesus. I didn't even know those three were in Chicago. What ?” 

“They moved a couple months ago,” Janis tells him. “I remember a post from Gretchen about it. Remember, I was rejoicing not being in the same city as Regina for the first time ever?” 

“I do remember that,” Damian sighs. “And now I do remember being nervous about the idea of her being back where Cady is, but…”

“...but Chicago’s a big place, just like New York,” Janis reminds him, exactly the same way she had months ago. “We didn't run into them for nine years here.”

“Yeah, well, clearly , they've run into each other in Chicago!” Damian exclaims. “I need to call Cady. And her mom. God, I hope she's okay.” 

“I don't know what she's thinking . It's Regina . Regina George !” 

“Hi, quick question, what's so wrong about Regina George?” Matt chimes in. 

Janis is stunned. “You haven't told him ?” 

“I mean, I've told him about Cady,” Damian replies. “but I didn't get into all the details. Didn't seem fair to her.” 

“Regina George is this absolute monster we grew up with,” Janis begins to explain. “She outed me in middle school and ruined my life, and then junior year, she, like, actually ruined our friend Caddy’s life after her boyfriend died.” 

“Wait, Cady’s boyfriend died ?” 

“No, no,” Damian says to his boyfriend. “Aaron was Regina’s boyfriend, but Cady had a crush on him. We’re pretty sure Regina only even got back with him because Cady liked him.”

“Wow. This is, uh, complicated. Wait, how'd she ruin her life?” 

“She blamed Cady for Aaron’s death. Very loudly and publicly. It sent Cady into a depression she never fully got out of,” Damian explains. “She was, like, one of the smartest people in our year. By the end of junior year, she dropped out. She got her GED eventually but… that's it. She should be working for NASA or something. Now she's a barista.”

“She would have been fine eventually if it weren't for Regina,” Janis grumbles. “Aaron’s death was awful, but she would have been okay . She was getting better when Regina ruined her.” 

“That's awful,” Matt says quietly. “Why is she getting dinner with this chick then?” 

Janis throws her hands up in the air. “That's what I wanna know!” 

“I'll give her a call, see what's going on,” Damian says in a calming voice. He's alarmed too, but he can tell Janis is getting more worked up than he's seen in a long time. Regina George tends to have that effect on her. 

“She’s probably at work,” Janis sighs. 

“I'll try her mom if she doesn't pick up,” Damian tells her. “I’m sure she's got opinions about this.” 

“Oh, I'm sure .” Janis remembers the long nights in junior year spent in Cady’s house, her friend catatonic while Janis and Dr. Heron seethed together about the mere continued existence of Regina George. No one on Earth hated Regina more than Janis, but Dr. Heron came in a very close second.

“I'll let you know what I hear, okay? And go for a walk or something. You need to relax.”

“I can't relax, Damian. Regina fucking George !” 

“And I would really prefer to only deal with one crisis at a time, thank you!” Damian tells her. “At least let me find out what's going on before you start going nuclear.” 

Janis takes a deep breath. “Okay, fine . But you need to let me know as soon as you find out!”

“You're my first call, I promise. Go finish your morning routine.” 

“How'd you know?”

“Janis, I've been your best friend for over twenty years.”

“Okay, fine.” 

The pair exchange their goodbyes, and Janis throws herself back into her bed. 

This is gonna be a long day. 

Damian tries to call Cady first, but there's no answer. He sighs, but isn't that shocked. She's probably at work. He tries Dr. Heron next, not having called her directly in quite a long time. 

To his relief, Dr. Heron does pick up. 

“Hey, Dr. Heron!” Damian says with a smile. “It's been too long!” 

“It has,” she replies, “And how many times do I have to tell you to call me Betsy!”

“You earned that title!” Damian reminds her, laughing lightly. 

“Not that I don't love an unexpected catch up, but I have a feeling I know why you're calling,” Dr. Heron says. 

“Yeah, I saw a post today and was really concerned,” Damian says cautiously. “One from Karen Shetty. Gretchen Wieners and Regina George were tagged in it, but it looked like Cady was there too.” 

Dr. Heron sighs. “She was.” 

“What happened ?” Damian asks. 

Dr. Heron delves right into the story, starting with the phone call she got a few weeks ago from Regina on Cady’s phone. She tells him how Cady had a run-in at work with a boy who looked like Aaron and had the same name, and how she froze up. And how, apparently , Regina George was there , and got Cady home. How Regina called her, and she rushed home faster than she ever had before, terrified that every moment Cady spent with Regina would undo every bit of effort and progress Cady had made in the last ten years. 

She told him, through gritted teeth, how Regina apologized, and admitted to going to Cady’s work three days a week for five months. 

“What the fuck?” Damian says, cutting Dr. Heron off for the first time since the story had begun. “Doesn't that qualify as stalking?” 

“I don't know,” Dr. Heron sighs. “Cady doesn't seem to think so.”

“Wait, Cady was okay with this?” 

“I'm getting there.” 

Dr. Heron continues on, telling Damian how she told Regina to get out and stay away from Cady, and how the girl had apparently left her business card in Cady's apron. How Cady found it, and agonized for two weeks over calling. How both her and Cady’s therapist advised against it, but Cady didn't listen. 

“That was just a week ago,” Dr. Heron tells him. “They've been talking every day. Regina’s back to Cady’s work three days a week, because Cady apparently asked her to.”

“She what ?” 

“They had some really long talk after Cady called,” Dr. Heron sighs. “Cady won't tell me exactly what they talked about, but she did at least tell her therapist, who still thinks this is all a bad idea, but Cady has made it very clear she's just going to do what she wants anyways.” 

“Why wouldn't she tell you?” Damian asks. Last he knew, Cady always told her mom everything . 

“She said it wasn't entirely her story to tell. That Regina said some stuff that explained why she did what she did, even if it doesn't make it okay.”

“I cannot imagine what could possibly explain what Regina did.” 

“I've been trying to figure it out for three weeks.” Dr. Heron sounds exasperated. “I have no idea. I'm glad you called, honestly. I need help on this.” 

“I’ll fly to Chicago and shake some sense into her if I need to,” Damian tells her. “How has she been, with all of this?” 

“She had a rougher time for a couple of weeks after she saw that boy. She called out of work a couple of times, which she never does. But ever since last week, since she called Regina, she's been… fine .” The last word comes out in a near hiss. “But I don't trust that it'll stay that way.” 

“Me neither. I tried calling her before I called you, but she didn't pick up.” 

“Yeah, she's at work. She gets off at noon today, I think.”

“I'll try to give her another call this afternoon then.” Damian sighs. “I know the answer to this, but you tried to talk her out of this, right?”

“Every day for the last three weeks,” Dr. Heron replies. “We've fought about it pretty much every day. We haven't fought about things in years . She's made it very clear that she's an adult and can choose who she wants to talk to, even if it's Regina George.” 

“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph,” Damian mutters under his breath. “Of all the times, now she decides to be stubborn again?”

“She's always been stubborn,” Dr. Heron tells him. “Even when she was doing really bad. She was almost stubbornly doing really bad, until one day she decided she was going to get better. She's been stubborn about that until now. Now it's this.” 

“I'll try to talk some sense into her,” Damian says. “Janis will too. She was the one that found the post and called me freaking out.” 

“Oh, tell her I hope she's doing well! It's been too long since we've seen you two.” Dr. Heron’s tone is suddenly happier. She's always liked Janis. She's always liked Damian too, but she always gets extra happy when Damian calls and mentions Janis. 

“I will,” Damian tells her. “Did Cady tell you how last night went?” 

“She got home and told me all about it,” Dr. Heron admits. “She says she had a great time. She really missed Gretchen and Karen, who sound like they're doing well. I don't really have any issues with them.”

“Me neither,” Damian tells her. “They were caught up in all the crap Regina was spewing, too. They always cared about Cady.”

Dr. Heron sighs. “I know. It makes me wish there was a way she could connect with them but not Regina, but that doesn't seem possible.” 

“No, those three have always been a package deal.” 

“But, yeah, Cady claims she had a great time. Regina drove her there, paid for everyone's food, and had Cady back home before sundown. A true gentleman.” Dr. Heron's voice is dripping with sarcasm. 

Damian scoffs. “She paid for everything too? Does she think she can pay away everything she did?”

“I hope not. The first time that girl tries to offer me money I might actually snap.” 

“Don't go fun Janis on me, Doc. Cady and I need you both out of prison.”

Dr. Heron laughs. “Damian, I've spent my entire career studying life cycles and biology. You don't think I wouldn't know how to properly dispose of a body?”

“...that is the craziest thing I've ever heard you say, Doc.” 

“They call that the Regina George effect.” 

It's Damian’s turn to burst out laughing. When he calms down, Dr. Heron speaks again. 

“God, Damian, I've missed you and Jan. We gotta get you two back out here again sometime. Maybe when Cady’s thinking clearly and all this blows over.” 

“Hate to break it to you, Doc, but I think that's kinda the whole problem. Cady hasn't thought clearly in ten years.” 

“She really has been doing better lately,” Dr. Heron says. “The last year or so. She's even toyed with the idea of going back to school. Community college or something.” Her voice gets very soft. “I just don’t want her to regress. She’s been doing so well. She’s come so far.” 

“I know, Betsy,” Damian sighs, giving in and using her first name. She needs that right now, and he knows it. “I’m gonna talk to her, okay? See if I can convince her to cut Regina off.” 

“Thanks, Damian. You’ve always been such a good friend to her.” 

“Of course, Betsy. It takes a village, remember?” He smiles slightly at the phrase. It’s one they’d exchanged a lot during the horror show that was junior year, when he, Janis, and Dr. Heron, along with Damian and Janis’s families, worked together to make sure that Cady was taken care of. 

“It really does. Listen, I’ve got a class soon, so I have to go. Let me know how the call goes, okay?”

“Of course, Doc. Go fill those minds with wisdom!” He pauses for a second, and then adds, “Maybe leave the dead body thing out, though? I don’t think that would go over well with the students.” 

Dr. Heron cackles. “This is a freshman biology lecture. They’d be scarred for life.” 

The pair exchange their goodbyes, and Damian collapses into the couch in his apartment, sighing. Matt’s sitting on the couch already, looking at his boyfriend with concern. 

“Dead body?” Matt asks cautiously.

Damian waves his hand. “Don’t worry about it. Do you mind if I invite Janis over? It’ll be easier to do the call with Cady with her here.” 

Matt nods. “Of course. But… really, though, dead body ?”

Janis is relieved to get Damian’s text telling her to come over. She knows she’s not going to be able to get any work done today, not with Regina induced rage coursing through her veins. A man tries to hit on her on the subway (which seriously confused her, because she couldn’t look any gayer if she tried ), but she honest to God snarls at him and he leaves her alone. Half the subway car scoots to the other end or even switches cars, which would be embarrassing on a normal day, but Janis doesn’t really care right now. She can’t get anything but pure rage out of her skull. 

Damian tells her all about his call with Dr. Heron when she gets to his house, both Janis and Matt soaking up every word. Matt occasionally asks a clarifying question here and there, but it’s quickly apparent he’s as invested in this as the two of them are now.

For a brief, brief moment, Janis’s mind takes a break from the rage to note that Matt is really good for Damian. He gets Damian in a way no one other than Janis has been able to before. She makes a mental note to tell Matt this sometime, when she’s less on edge. 

Matt ends up convincing them both to eat an early lunch, even though they aren’t very hungry. The afternoon call is going to take it out of them, which all three of them know. Janis eats her sandwich bitterly, thinking of all the ways she could end this. Forget revenge parties. Janis wants blood . 

Damian politely suggests she should bring this up with her therapist at their next session. Janis flips him off. Damian laughs. Matt looks horrified.

Maybe he isn’t as attuned to the two best friends as she thought. 

Cady checks her phone in the breakroom after clocking out of work. It had been a busy morning, with little time to rest all shift. She sees a text from Regina, which makes her heart soar, followed by a call from Damian and a text in their group chat with Janis, bringing it right back down to her stomach. 

She was really hoping she’d be able to put off this conversation for a little longer, but luck is not on her side.

She slides her phone back into her pocket, grabbing her bag and waving goodbye to her coworkers. She is not opening any of those until she gets home. 

The walk doesn’t take long, but it feels like it lasts forever . Cady’s stomach is twisting and turning in knots. Her legs feel like jello, but she’s doing everything she can to power through. 

She thinks about Regina, about the sweet good morning text she knows is waiting for her. On days where Cady works, she’s already there by the time Regina wakes up, so she usually doesn’t respond until the afternoon, unless it’s a slow day. Which today certainly wasn’t. 

She was fine, but it had been a bad shift. She’d had not one, not two, but three super bitchy customers come in, back to back, while on register. When she switched to making drinks, a whole school bus full of high schoolers touring UChicago came in, and they all ordered the super sugary drinks that no one liked making. 

At least none of them looked like her dead friend this time.

After the high schoolers had left, she switched back to register, but she could feel herself deflating. Her social battery was drying up, fast , but she’d still had a few hours of the shift left. It felt like it had taken years off her life, but she got through it.

She always did.

She had been looking forward to going home, taking a nap, and telling Regina about her day when Regina got off work. Now, she’s trudging towards her home with even less energy than she already had. 

She gets herself up to her apartment, throwing her bag to the ground near the door. She pulls out her phone again, looking at it for a long moment. She decides against answering for now, and instead, opts to take a long , hot shower. 

By the time Cady’s gotten out, dried off, changed, and flopped into bed, she’s got another message from Damian. She still hasn’t opened the first one yet. She grits her teeth, avoiding opening the group chat, and instead, reads the message from Regina.

Regina - 7:18am

Good morning! :) I hope you have a good day at work!

Cady smiles at the message, letting that sit with her instead of the anxiety in her stomach. 

Cady - 1:12pm

Hi! Crazy day at work, but I’m home now and glad it’s over. Hope you’re having a good day!!

Cady backs out of her conversation with Regina, staring at the preview of Damian’s message in the groupchat. Hey girlie! She has to resist rolling her eyes. These are her friends , she reminds herself. They care about her. They definitely found out about Regina, whether it be from her mom or Karen’s Instagram posts from last night, but she knows they know. Damian never calls before he texts. 

Swallowing her pride, she clicks the groupchat. 

Damian - 9:37am 

Hey Cady! We haven’t talked in ages! Give me a call when you can! :) 

Damian - 1:03pm

Hey girlie! Give me a call, it’s important

Cady sighs, clicks his contact, and presses the call button. She might as well get it over with. 

On the fourth ring, a FaceTime request comes through. Cady sighs again, answering it, rolling over onto her stomach on the bed. 

“Hey, boo!” Damian greets with a smile. Janis is in frame too, but she looks more mad than anything. “It's been a little while.”

“Yeah, it has,” Cady says. “Little over a month, I think.” 

“Fuck the small talk,” Janis cuts in. “What the hell , Caddy?” 

“I take it you guys know about Regina then?”

“ I take it you guys know about Regina then ,” Janis does a poor imitation of Cady’s voice, before rolling her eyes. “Yes! Number one, what the hell are you doing, number two, what the hell are you thinking -”

Damian puts a hand on her shoulder. “Janis,” he cuts her off, “maybe we should let Cady start from the beginning?” 

“I think that's probably a good idea,” Cady says. 

Janis makes a face, but then huffs, waving for Cady to continue before crossing her arms. 

“Well, it started, I guess nearly six months ago now,” Cady says. “I was just working my normal shift on a Monday morning and none other than Regina George enters the shop. I was dealing with another customer, so it didn't register to me right away, till I saw her in line. I was very calm about the whole thing and I was extremely proud of myself.” Cady looks away from the camera. “She was on her phone basically the whole time she was in line, so she didn't really see me until she got up to the counter. I braced myself, expecting the worst, but I opened with the same line I use for every customer. She got all flustered, but she ordered her drink, and when I asked for her name, she told me Rachel .”

“ Rachel ?” Damian echoes. 

“You asked for her name ?” Janis hisses. 

Cady shrugs. “I thought, maybe if I play it off as if she's any other customer, maybe she’ll just ignore me and go on with her day. I really expected her to leave and never come back after she got her drink. Instead, she sat down at a booth and stayed there for a couple of hours. She left eventually, before my shift was over, but I was pretty shocked by the whole thing.” 

“I fully planned to tell my therapist about it that week,” Cady admits. “But then on Wednesday, she came back, at the same exact time. I took her order, she told me her name was Rachel, someone made her drink, and she sat in the same booth and worked for a few hours. I caught her looking at me a few times, but it wasn't like when she would glare at me in high school. She’d always immediately look away and pretend to be busy.” 

“And somehow you didn't tell your therapist this,” Damian says.

Cady shakes her head. “I don't really know why. Something in me just told me to wait it out. See what happens.” 

“ Wait it out ?” Janis echoes. “Caddy, this is Regina fucking George .” 

“Janis,” Damian sighs. “Please, let her finish.” 

Cady looks away again. “She came in, every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, like clockwork, same time, same order, same name, same booth, for… five months.” 

“Caddy, we talked to you five times, and you didn't tell us this?” Janis asks. 

“I saw my therapist twenty times and didn't tell her!” Cady exclaims. “Look, I don't know why I was keeping it a secret. I just was , okay? No, you know what? I do know why. Because I knew this would be the reaction. You guys, my mom, my therapist… everyone wants me to just cut her off.” 

“Yes,” Janis says, like it's the most obvious thing in the world. “That would be the smart thing to do, Caddy.” 

“I never felt bad when she was there. Not like I did back then. I found myself looking forward to it, honestly. We never talked. She’d just order and sit and sometimes work and sometimes watch me. I pretended not to notice. It felt, like, I don't know, she was checking on me.”

“Three times a week for five months isn't checking on someone,” Damian says. “Honey, that's stalking.” 

“It's not like that!” Cady huffs. “I knew exactly what I was doing.”

“Did you?” Janis asks. “I really don't think you did.”

“Do you guys actually want the full story, or are you just gonna keep berating me every two seconds?” 

Both Damian and Janis fall quiet. Damian gestures for her to continue. 

“We had our little unspoken routine, and I liked it. If that makes me weird or whatever, so be it. I’m already fucked in the head, so why not? Anyways, a couple of weeks ago, this kid came into the shop with his parents. They were touring UChicago or something. I was making drinks, and I saw the guy’s cup, and his name was Aaron. Now, I've served a lot of Aarons before. Seeing the name doesn't feel great, but if I take a deep breath, I'm okay . I mastered that years ago. So I did that, and made the kid his drink. But when I went to go hand it to him at the pickup counter, I saw him, and I swear to fucking God, he looked exactly like Aaron. Like, if it had been 16 years instead of 10, seeing that kid would have made me fully believe in reincarnation. I swear to you, he was identical .”

Cady takes a deep breath. “I looked at this kid, and I said his name, and I froze up. For the first time in years, I fully froze up. I haven't had an episode like that since I was doing my programs. It was bad . No one I was working with that day realized what happened at first, because that's never happened before there. But Regina saw. Regina knew . She jumped in and got me out of there. She talked to my manager and explained and got me home. She called my mom on my phone, got her to come home. She waited with me until my mom got there, and then my mom yelled at her for a little while and told her to never come back to my work. She apologized a whole bunch, to both my mom and I, but I couldn't really respond. And then she left.” 

“At some point she put her business card in my work apron. I found it a couple days later when I was starting to feel okay again. I saved the number and then told my mom and my therapist about it. Both of them thought reaching out was a bad idea, and at first, I did too.” 

“Then I went back to work and she wasn't there when she always was and everything felt wrong . It felt off . I went back and forth on it for two weeks, but eventually, I just couldn't anymore. I called out of work and I stayed home and I called her instead.” 

Janis’s shoulders deflate. “Caddy…” 

“Please, I'm almost there,” Cady says. “We talked on the phone a little bit. I actually almost hung up on her after I called, at first. I was so scared. She was really nice that day when it happened, and she’s been really nice for months, but I just… I remember, you know? Despite what everyone thinks, I remember it all very clearly. We started talking on the phone but we both clearly needed more and so I invited her over.”

“You invited her over ,” Damian echoes questioningly. 

“She already had my address from when she brought me home,” Cady points out. “She came right over and we talked for a long while. About a lot of things. She apologized, like, a lot , and explained why she did what she did back then. She also was very clear that she wasn't trying to, like, absolve herself of any wrongdoing or anything. I asked her why she did it, and she told me.”

“So, why'd she do it?” Janis asks. 

Cady shakes her head. “That's not my story to tell. The only person I've told is my therapist, and I'm keeping it that way unless Regina wants to tell anyone else herself.”

“Cady…” Damian cautions. 

“No, I'm not sharing that with you. I'm sorry, but no. I need you to trust me when I say that I accepted her apologies and her explanations, but that doesn't mean I've forgiven her.” 

Janis tilts her head. “But you're still talking to her. And you went out to dinner with her and Gretchen and Karen.” 

“I did,” Cady confirms. “I will say this. She explained to me that the reason she stayed at the coffee shop at first was because she felt guilty and she wanted to check in and see if I was okay, but she also thought I didn't recognize her, because I played it off so damn well.” 

“She should feel guilty,” Janis mutters, which Cady ignores. 

“She was very honest with me, or at least, it really seems that way. She kept coming back because she felt like she was learning things about me by watching me interact with my coworkers-”

“ Stalker ,” Damian coughs. Cady ignores that too. 

“-and then eventually it just became part of her routine and she really liked it. She apparently used to go to coffee shops to work sometimes back in New York, too, but usually not the same one.” 

Damian gives her a pointed look. “Do I need to say it?”

“She wasn't stalking me, Damian,” Cady huffs. “She never followed me home. She never tried to talk to me. She wanted to, but she was very adamant that she didn't want to hurt me. She really thought I didn't recognize her. I don't know how , because she's literally Regina George , but, you know.” 

“Repeatedly showing up at a person’s workplace to just watch them is stalking,” Damian says. “That's just a fact. Don't you ever get sexual harassment trainings at work?” 

Cady rolls her eyes. “She wasn’t stalking me. I'm moving on. Anyways, by the end of our very long talk, she offered to me the option of trying to rebuild our friendship, if I wanted to do that. And I did. And it's been going really well so far.”

“Caddy, your first friendship with her was based on a lie,” Janis points out. “You were spying for us!” 

Cady waves her hand. “That stuff doesn't matter anymore.”

“It absolutely matters,” Janis says. “You're rebuilding a friendship that was originally based on a lie and ended up tanking your mental health!” 

“And now I have coping strategies and medication and a phenomenal therapist.”

“Who you clearly don't listen to,” Janis retorts. 

“Who's side are you on here?” Cady snaps back, getting more annoyed by the second. 

“Cady,” Damian says gently. “We’re worried about you. We just don't want you to get hurt again.”

“That's what everyone keeps saying,” Cady snaps, “but I'm not 16 anymore. I can take care of myself.”

“What happens when she snaps at you?” Janis asks. “Or when the anniversary rolls around again and suddenly she's there too? Then what?” 

“Then I will deal with it , and figure it out , like I do every year,” Cady insists. She shakes her head. “You guys act like I'm incapable. You all do. Did it even occur to you once that last night was the most fun I've had in ten years? That going out and having friends made me feel more like a person than a decade of therapy and medications has?” 

“You have friends,” Damian gestures to himself and Janis, “who are very concerned about you.”

Cady just looks at them for a long moment. “When was the last time either of you told me about something going on in your lives, other than things were ‘going great!’?” 

Damian blinks. “What do you mean?” 

“You two don't share your successes with me,” Cady says. “You gloss over it when I ask for details. I don't know anything that's going on in your lives. I haven't seen either of you in person for over two years . You both treat me like I'm made of glass and if you say the wrong thing, I'll shatter any second.” 

“Because you have shattered before,” Janis points out. “We were there. For every second of it.”

“I was 16! I was grieving! My brain chemistry was changing and I didn't know what the hell to do! But I do know now! And everyone still treats me like I'm that same 16 year old!” Cady is practically yelling now. “Regina treats me like a person , which is more than I can say about either of you!” 

“Cady-.”

“No,” Cady cuts Damian off. “I'm not listening to a lecture about how Regina George is going to ruin my life again. I'm not going to listen to people who can't even be bothered to realize I am better, and I can handle it . I can handle a lot more than you give me credit for. Yeah, I didn't mention Regina for five months, but you've been with Matt for nearly a year, and I didn't even know he existed!” 

Damian’s eyes go wide. “I, um-.”

“Regina told me the other day. She found out from Gretchen who's seen you on social media. They all thought I knew. They were appalled that you didn't tell me, and honestly, so am I .” She takes a big, deep breath. “I’m done with this conversation. Call me when you feel like treating me like an adult.” 

She hangs up the call, and for a split second, all the anger and adrenaline courses through her. Then, she immediately bursts out into tears, tossing her phone aside and shoving her face into her pillow. 

Every emotion comes bubbling to the surface at once. Her anger is still there, still present, but she'd also just screamed at her two oldest friends. She doesn't regret what she said, no, it was the truth, but that doesn't mean it didn't suck . 

She feels her phone buzz on the mattress and nearly chucks it at the wall before she spots the name on the screen. It's not Damian or Janis, but rather, Regina. 

Regina - 2:10pm

I'm sorry to hear it was crazy! I hope it wasn't too bad, at least. My day’s going pretty well! Two of the designers got new projects done ahead of their deadlines which is always a good thing!

Cady - 2:10pm

I'm so sorry to ask this but can I call you

Her phone lights up seconds after she hits send, an incoming phone call from Regina. Cady wipes her tears, taking a deep breath, and answers the phone. 

“Hi,” she says softly, her voice raw. 

“Hey,” Regina replies, concern immediately in her voice. “Are you okay?”

“No,” Cady admits. “I… I just got into a big fight with Damian and Janis.”

“What happened?” 

“They saw Karen’s post,” Cady explains, trying to hold back her sobs. “And they freaked out on me for talking to you. Just like everybody else in my life. And I'm just so sick and tired of everyone else trying to tell me what to do all the damn time and it's just too much .”

“Cady, take a deep breath for me, please ,” Regina says softly. “And I don't mean that in a telling-you-what-to-do way.” 

Cady laughs, but she listens and takes the deep breath, steadying herself a bit more. “I know it's not like that with you. You're pretty much the only person who doesn't question everything I do.” 

“I'm sorry that they don't see you as capable,” Regina tells her. “You're extremely capable.” 

“I'm just so tired of it. I finally snapped. And I'm angry and upset and everything all at once and I do not do well with that. If it's too much I start to freak out and I'm trying really hard not to do that but it's not really going too well.”

“Deep breaths, deep breaths,” Regina encourages. After Cady does that a few times, Regina asks, “What helps you to not freak out?” 

“It hasn't happened like this in a long time,” Cady says. “Not since I was doing the programs. It helped to get away for a little bit. Go somewhere else.” She pinches the bridge of her nose. “But the only places I ever go are work and home, and I cannot do this right now.”

“Do you wanna come over to my place for a bit?” Regina asks. “I can come pick you up.”

“Isn't it the middle of your workday?”

“It's fine,” Regina dismisses the concern. “We're ahead of schedule now with those big projects. I can move the only meeting I have this afternoon to tomorrow. I can be at your place in thirty minutes, if you want.” 

Cady thinks about this for a minute. “Yeah,” she finally decides, “I need to get out of here for a bit.”

“Let me get stuff squared away here, and then I'll text you when I'm on my way, okay? And keep taking those deep breaths for me while you wait.”

Cady closes her eyes, taking another deep breath. “Okay. I will.”

“Good. I'll see you soon, okay?”

“Okay.” 

They exchange their goodbyes, and Cady rolls over on her bed, staring up at the ceiling. 

Everything is going to be fine , she tells herself. Everything is going to be fine . 

Chapter Text

Regina George has never been so eager to leave work. As soon as she hangs up the call with Cady, she calls her secretary, Raúl, into her office. She tells him to move her meetings this afternoon to tomorrow, and that she's taking the rest of the day off. 

She throws her things into her bag, stalking out of her office and through the main office space of her company. She passes cubicles, work stations, and shut glass doors to other leadership offices. Gretchen pops her head out of her office, a smile on her face that quickly fades when she sees the serious look in Regina’s eye. 

“Everything okay, G?” Gretchen asks. 

Regina nods. “Yeah, it's fine. I'm taking the rest of the day off. I'll see you guys tomorrow.”

Gretchen frowns. “Let me know if you need anything, yeah?”

“Of course,” Regina nods again, and then she's off towards the elevator. 

Within ten minutes, she's made the short walk from her office to her apartment building, passing security with a little nod as she enters the lobby. She heads for the door that connects the building to the half-underground parking garage next door, and makes a beeline for her car. 

One of these days, one of these trips to Cady’s house will be casual enough that she can just walk there. At least, that's what she keeps telling herself as she gets into the car and brings it out of the garage. 

Since it's still the middle of the day, there's minimal traffic, and Regina gets to Cady’s apartment only 25 minutes after they ended the call. Cady comes out of the building as soon as she sees the car pull up. Regina’s heart sinks when she sees Cady in sweatpants and an oversized hoodie, hood up, and not because it’s a groufit. It's because it's actually warm out, and this is clearly a depression fit. 

Cady slides into the passenger seat, keeping her head low. “Thanks for coming to get me.”

“Of course,” Regina says, pulling the car out of the spot. “Do you, um, wanna talk about it, or do you wanna wait?”

“Wait, please,” Cady says quietly. “I just need to get out of here.”

“No problem.” Regina puts on her music, which she hadn't really been listening to on the way over. Soft pop fills the silence, but luckily, the ride does not take long. 

Regina pulls the car into the garage, heading to her assigned parking spot. Cady’s fidgeting nervously when they get out of the car, so Regina offers her a hand. 

Cady takes it, lacing their fingers together. She relaxes almost immediately at the touch. Regina tries to ignore the way it makes her heart beat faster . 

Physical touch grounds her , she reminds herself. She told you this already. That's all this is. Grounding her.

Regina leads Cady through the complex series of elevators and hallways it takes to get to her apartment. Cady is quiet the whole time, but keeps her hand locked with Regina’s. 

Finally, Regina presses her key fob to the door handle, and a lock clicks open. Regina leads Cady inside, letting her get her first look at Regina’s apartment.

Cady isn't surprised by how beautiful the apartment is. She remembers the George mansion back in Evanston very well. She is surprised, however, by how different the decor is. It's definitely still modern, but it's distinctly different from high school. Regina’s high school bedroom had been covered in decorations that said things like dramatic or gorgeous and everything had been themed to makeup and beauty. The artwork, at least in the huge living room that Cady is currently standing in, is far more abstract. There's no words, no logos, no slogans. There's also far less pink than Cady remembers. 

The furniture still looks like it costs more than the rent on her tiny apartment, which isn't surprising either. There's a door by the entryway that Cady assumes could be a closet, as well as a little table with an exquisite looking bowl that Regina drops her keys into. She then takes off her shoes at the entryway, which is a new behavior, but Cady follows suit. Regina briefly let's go of Cady's hand to tuck both pairs of shoes into the closet (Cady’s assumption was right), but she extends it back after the door is closed again. 

Cady takes Regina’s hand again and lets her lead her over to the couch, sitting her down. 

“Can I get you anything? Water or something? I’m not sure what else I have off the top of my head.”

“Water would be nice,” Cady tells Regina. Regina lets go of Cady’s hand and stands up, heading to the kitchen. “You have a really nice place,” Cady calls after her, still looking around and observing the room.

“Thanks,” Regina calls back, emerging a moment later with a cup of water. “I spent a lot of time refining my personal style.” 

“It’s really fitting,” Cady says. “It feels more genuine than your old bedroom.” 

Regina chuckles. “Yeah, my mom bought most of that stuff. It fit what I was going for at the time, but, you know. I’ve worked very hard to not be that person anymore.”

Cady nods. “I can tell.” She takes the cup Regina offers her, taking a big sip. Regina sits down next to her, looking carefully at Cady. Cady knows she must be able to see how puffy her eyes are, and how red her face still is. She only just managed to stop crying when Regina picked her up. 

“Do you wanna talk about it?” Regina asks softly. 

“Yeah,” Cady sighs. “It’s just a lot. I don’t really know where to begin.” 

“How about you tell me about your day first?” Regina suggests. “I know you said it was pretty crazy.” 

Cady laughs. “It was, but it was nothing compared to that phone call.” She shakes her head. “That’s where I’ll start, I guess. It was so crazy I didn’t get a chance to look at my phone all shift, and when I was clocking out, I saw the message from you, and a missed call from Damian, and a text from him.” She leans back in her spot, grabbing one of the nearby throw pillows and hugging it. “I knew that conversation was coming eventually. I knew him and Janis wouldn’t get it. I mean, no one gets it, really. Except for you and Gretchen and Karen. Everyone else thinks I’m making a horrible mistake.” 

“I mean, their last image of me is the person I was in high school,” Regina shrugs. “I was terrible . I can’t blame them for not trusting me.” 

“It was a lot worse than just that,” Cady tells her. “Anyways, I got home and took a shower first, because I knew it was gonna be a whole thing . He texted me again while I was in the shower, and hit me with the ‘ we need to talk ’.” 

Regina makes a face. “Oh boy.”

“So I called him, and he FaceTimed me. He and Janis were together, and Janis was so mad.” Cady tilts her head back, closing her eyes. “I knew she would be. She never really let go of her whole revenge plot.”

“...revenge plot?”

Cady’s eyes shoot open. “Oh, um, that’s right. I guess I never told you.” She bites her lip, thinking very hard about her words. “This is, um, well, it’s just going to be hard. You weren’t the only one who was a bad person in high school.” 

Regina sits up a little straighter. “What do you mean?”

“I met Janis and Damian on my first day of school. They were trying to help me find my people or whatever at lunch when you came in and called me over to your table.” She lowers her eyes to her lap. “After you asked me to sit with you guys for the week, I told Janis and Damian, and they wanted me to spy on you. Well, mostly Janis, honestly.” 

Cady doesn’t look up. She knows if she looks at Regina now, she won’t be able to finish explaining. “I went along with it at first because I had no idea what to do and Janis and Damian had been so nice to me and I just wanted friends . Then Halloween happened and it went from a very passive thing to something different.” She swallows. “When I watched you kiss Aaron, I was… so upset. I left and went right to Janis’s house. She and Damian told me the full story about middle school, and convinced me that we could all get our revenge together.” She let out the lightest breath of a laugh. “They kept calling it a revenge party , which seems so silly now. But, yeah. We were trying to dethrone you as queen bee or whatever, and I was supposed to end up with Aaron. But then he died and well…” Cady trails off. “That was it. It was over.” 

Regina shifts uncomfortably. “When I saw you with them at the funeral… I knew something was up. But I never knew exactly what. I… Thank you for telling me.”

Cady looks up nervously. “You’re not mad?”

“I mean, I am , but not at you,” Regina admits. “You… you weren’t…” Her voice trails off. “You just wanted friends. I know what I did to Janis back in middle school was horrible too. I wanted to reach out to her over the years, apologize, but she has me blocked everywhere. I figured it was best to just leave that where it was.” She looks at Cady cautiously. “What exactly did you guys do ?” 

“Not much, all things considered,” Cady shrugs lightly. “Oh, um, the face cream I gave you was actually lard.”

Regina hums, raising an eyebrow as she looks towards the ceiling. “That explains those breakouts.” 

“We, um, we wanted to break you and Aaron up, but we didn’t know how. We spent a lot of time brainstorming that. The only other thing we actually managed to do was the sprinklers at homecoming.”

Regina’s mouth drops open. “That was you ?” 

“Technically Janis was the one who did it, but it was Damian’s idea,” Cady shrugs, avoiding eye contact again. “I, um…” Cady swallows, before very quietly asking, “That wasn’t… that didn’t have anything to do with Aaron that night, right?” 

Regina shakes her head. “No, it didn’t. We still went to the dance, even with my makeup all wet and stuff. I wouldn’t have let him in either way.” Cady lets out a sigh of relief. Regina puts a hand on her knee. “What happened to Aaron wasn’t your fault, Cady. It really wasn’t.”

Cady nods again tentatively. “That was it, then. Janis wanted to do more, but some of it was too messed up. I didn’t let her do those things.”

“Like what?” 

“I’m not sure if that’s a good idea-.”

“Cady,” Regina cuts her off, “I am not mad at you. I’m not going to be mad at you. But I do think I have a right to know.” 

Cady takes a deep, shaky breath. “I had these Kalteen bars. They’re, like, these protein bars people use to gain weight. We used to give them to some of the elderly villagers back in Kenya, and then I ended up eating a lot of them junior year after he died, because I really wasn’t eating anything at all.” She shifts uncomfortably. “I’d eaten them occasionally before that, when I was busy or distracted and skipped meals and stuff. I had some on me one day when I was with Janis and Damian, and after I explained what they were, Janis wanted me to like, crush it up and put it in your food.” Her face sours. “It was really messed up. I refused to do that.” 

Regina takes a deep breath. “I am not mad at you,” she says first, trying very hard to keep her thoughts in order, “but I need a minute, okay? I’ll be right back.”

“Okay,” Cady nods, and she watches as Regina slowly stands up and walks out of the room, all of her movements very stiff and rigid. Cady tucks her knees up to her chest, burying her face into the throw pillow in her arms. God . Today sucks . 

Regina heads for her bathroom, carefully shutting the door behind her. She wants to yell, to scream, to break things, but she cannot do that right now. Cady is in the other room, and she’s hurting. Despite the anger coursing through Regina’s veins, none of it is directed at her, and she knows that she could easily make things worse if it seems like any of it is. 

She grips the edge of her bathroom counter, taking slow, deep breaths. She counts them out in her head, utilizing the strategies she’d learned in therapy years ago by this point. It helps, for a few moments, but she knows it’s not enough. 

What she did to Janis and Cady were both horrible , yes, and she could understand why Janis had wanted revenge. But that ? That shit with the Kalteen bars, when Janis knew how many body image issues Regina had? She knew the shit Regina’s mom used to say around her, around both of them. Janis knew about her relationship with food and her body and everything , especially back then, and she still wanted to do that ? 

Regina takes another deep breath. She tries to reason her way through this. Yes , Janis knew, but Janis hated Regina back then. And there were definitely plenty of times that Regina used other people’s insecurities against them in high school. High school Regina was a terrible person. 

That doesn’t make what Janis tried to do okay though. It hurts, it stings in a way that Regina hasn’t felt in years . Betrayal . She’s not sure the last time she genuinely felt betrayed by someone. And, sure, her and Janis certainly weren’t friends at that point, or even now, by any stretch of the imagination. But it still hurts . It hurts like hell. 

Regina shuts her eyes, taking another deep breath. Okay, logic isn’t really working either. She needs to snap out of this, calm down, and go help Cady. She can process the rest of this later with her therapist. She’ll probably even have some wise revelation that connects everything together. She usually does when it comes to the complexity of Regina George’s life. 

Yet, despite everything she’s trying, Regina can’t just put her anger away. It’s there. It’s present. She can’t ignore the way it bubbles beneath the surface, threatening to boil over. She needs to do something , quick, to get this out of her system.

Her eyes land on the shower. Without a second thought, she strips, throwing herself into the shower, face full of makeup, and turns the cold water on blast. 

It shocks the hell out of her, her whole body jerking at the temperature. She stands there for about thirty seconds, letting the ice cold water cover her whole body, shivering under the stream. She turns off the water, trembling as she gets back out and wraps herself in her fluffiest towel. 

Okay, yeah. That did it. She’s not angry anymore. That sucked , but it worked. 

She takes a few minutes to warm herself back up with the towel, and wipe the extra makeup off her face. She may have been wearing waterproof mascara, but there’s only so much a person can do against an assault of ice cold water. 

Regina slips back out of the bathroom and into her bedroom, quickly getting changed into something much comfier than her work clothes that she had been wearing. She decides to match Cady’s vibe, opting for sweatpants and an oversized t-shirt. At least they could be comfortable and emotional together. 

Regina returns to the living room, finding Cady curled up in a ball on the couch, head against the throw pillow in her arms. “Cady?” she asks softly.

Cady looks up, blinking, confused. “Why are you wet?”

“I stood under cold water for a second. It calmed me down,” Regina explains, sitting back down on the couch, a bit closer to Cady this time. “You okay?”

Cady nods slowly. “Are you ?”

“I am,” Regina says honestly. “And I’m not mad at you. I mean that.” 

“Okay.” 

Regina can see how much puffier Cady’s eyes are. She’s definitely been crying again. She reaches down to under the coffee table, grabbing some tissues and putting them between themselves. “Let’s go back to the call with Damian and Janis,” Regina says, remaining as calm as she can while saying Janis’s name. 

“Right,” Cady sniffles, grabbing a tissue and dabbing at her eyes. “Well, okay, so Janis was really angry. She was angry at me, and Damian just kept saying he was worried. Like, over and over.”

“Did they say how they found out?” Regina asks.

“They saw me in the background of Karen’s Instagram post, sitting next to you. Plus, I think my mom called him earlier or maybe the other way around.”

“Your mom ?”

Cady nods. “They used to do that a lot years ago. Especially the first couple of years. Damian did a lot to take care of me junior year. He and my mom would often talk, even after we moved to Chicago, because he was always worrying about how I was doing.” 

“Does that… bother you?” Regina asks, trying not to make it too obvious that it was really weird to her. 

“I mean, not really. Not before this, I guess. They were all just trying really hard to make sure I was okay. It eventually stopped over time. I don’t know the last time they talked before this,” Cady shrugs. 

“Did he say something about your mom?”

“No, but my mom said something about him ,” Cady sighs. “I texted her after I called you. Told her I needed to get out of the house and I was going to your place for a bit. She, of course, told me she thought that was a bad idea and asked me if I talked to Damian.” Cady grit her teeth. “I said yes. She asked me how it went and I left her on read. Pretty sure she should have been able to figure that one out on her own.” 

Regina puts a hand on one of Cady’s knees, which is still raised up to her chest. “I’m so sorry.”

Cady shakes her head. “It’s not your fault.”

“I mean, it kind of is,” Regina sighs. 

“My mom has always been protective of me. Even before we left Kenya. That’s not your fault. That’s just what moms do.”

Some of them , Regina thinks, but she’s grateful she holds her tongue. Now isn’t really the time to dump her own personal brand of mommy issues onto Cady. Instead, she just nods, gesturing for her to continue. 

“Anyways, my call with Damian and Janis. Yeah. They were mad, and kept trying to convince me I was making a huge mistake. Janis was really angry. Damian kept trying to calm her down. I explained everything that had happened, but I left out some of the details about our talk last week, like I did with my mom,” Cady explains.

Regina nods. She already knows that the only person Cady has told about Regina’s coming out is her therapist. Cady made it very clear shortly after their talk that she tells her mom pretty much everything, but she wouldn’t tell anyone about that specifically. It wasn’t Cady’s to share. 

Old Janis-related guilt had boiled up with that one. Regina had pushed it back down, like she was trying to do again, right now. 

“They weren’t happy,” Cady continues, pulling Regina from her thoughts. “Janis kept getting mad and Damian kept trying to tell me that you were stalking me. At some point, I just got so tired of listening to them tell me what they think is best for me and I just kinda… snapped. I yelled at them.” Cady gives her a look. “I don’t yell at people. Ever.” 

“What did you say?” Regina asks cautiously. 

“I kind of told them off about how they treat me like I’m on the brink of a mental breakdown all the time,” Cady sighs. “Like, how they never tell me anything about their lives. Or the way they don’t trust me to make my own decisions. I said something about them treating me like I’m going to shatter, and then they were like, ‘We were there when you did shatter’ and I was like, ‘Yeah but I’m better now, not that either of you would know because you never have real conversations with me or let me show you that I’m better’.” Cady tilts her head back and forth as she talks, one side representing herself, the other Damian and Janis. “Then I brought up the Matt thing. They were shocked to hear I knew, which isn’t surprising. I told them how I found out, but I didn’t really let Damian defend himself. I told them to call me when they felt like treating me like an adult, and then I hung up.” Cady closes her eyes, rocking slightly in her seat. “I can’t believe I did that,” she whispers. “What have I done?”

“Cady, you stood up for yourself ,” Regina tells her, putting a hand on Cady’s shoulder, rubbing gently with her thumb. “I’m really proud of you.” 

Cady cracks an eye open. “I don’t feel very proud.” 

“That’s because standing up for yourself isn’t easy. Like, at all. Especially to people you care about.” Regina squeezes Cady’s shoulder lightly. “Trust me. I know that far too well.” 

“ You struggle to stand up for yourself?” Cady asks, in genuine disbelief. “You’re Regina George!” 

Regina gives her a sad smile. “Despite my boundless confidence and immense humility, I actually am a human being under all of this.” She gestures to herself, which, admittedly, even she finds ironic, since she’s literally bare faced and in sweatpants. “And that includes plenty of issues when it comes to being my real self around other people. Gretchen said it herself last night. It took me a long time to figure out how to be myself, even around them. The first step to that is being able to stand up for yourself.” 

Cady lowers her head a bit. “I just feel bad for yelling at them. They’ve been my only friends for, well, basically ever.” 

“You’re right , though. They don’t treat you like an adult. They don’t see you for you . They just see what happened to you.” Regina takes a moment, trying to collect her thoughts. “You are so much more than what happened to you. And I know that’s real ironic coming from me, but-.”

“It’s not ironic,” Cady interrupts. “It’s a sign that you grew up.”

“And you did too,” Regina says, squeezing Cady’s shoulder again. “I mean it. I know that you aren’t the same person you once were, but you’re still Cady Heron. You’re smart and funny and you care a whole lot about the people you love. You feel your emotions to their extremes, but that’s what makes you you . If they, or your mom, or your therapist, see that as a bad thing , they aren’t seeing you . And that fucking sucks for them, because you’re awesome .” 

Cady just stares at Regina for a moment, before bursting out into tears again. She throws her arms around Regina’s shoulders, hugging her and burying herself in Regina’s shoulder. Regina is stunned for a moment at the sudden contact, but quickly wraps her arms around Cady as she sobs into her. 

“Hey, hey, it’s okay. You’re okay. I’m sorry. That was too much. I’m sorry.”

“N-no,” Cady stammers between sobs. “Don’t be sorry. T-that was the n-nicest thing anyone’s ever said to m-me.” 

Shit . Regina’s heart shatters. She tightens her hold on Cady, rubbing her back gently. “I’ve got you,” she says quietly. “I’ve got you.”

They stay like that for a while, Cady curled up in Regina’s arms. Her sobbing slows eventually, but Regina still holds her close, rubbing her back and whispering to her over and over. Cady finds it really soothing, and lets it continue for far longer than she realistically needs. 

“Thank you,” Cady eventually says, voice soft and raw. 

“Of course,” Regina says quietly back. “Here, you should drink some water.” She leans forward a bit, careful not to fully release Cady, grabbing her cup off the coffee table and handing it to her. Cady takes a few big gulps, holding the cup in her hands as she stays curled against Regina. 

“I’m sorry for taking your whole afternoon to just cry all over you.”

“Cady, don’t apologize,” Regina sighs, rubbing Cady’s back again. “I really meant it when I said I want to be here for you. Whatever that looks like, I’m happy to help.” 

Cady is quiet for a few more moments. She takes another sip of water. “Can I ask you a question?”

“Sure,” Regina replies.

“Do you still have feelings for me?” 

Regina’s breath catches in her throat. “I, um…” She takes a deep breath. Honesty . “Yeah. I do. But I don’t want to pressure you or anything. If you just want to be friends, I’m more than okay with that.” 

Cady is quiet again, for a long time. Eventually, Regina very quietly says, “Cady, please say something.” 

“I don’t know what I want yet,” Cady admits. “I’ve never really thought about it before.”

“About… us?”

“About my sexuality,” Cady admits. “I know I had a crush on Aaron, but like, that was it. Ever. Except…”

“Except who?” Regina asks.

Cady looks up at her. “Except you. Back then, I had a crush on you too. But I just don’t think I ever realized it, because I was so focused on Aaron. And it made more sense to me that I’d have a crush on a guy.” 

Regina swallows. Cady curled up against her, looking up at her, telling Regina she had a crush on her too , it’s almost all too much. Regina closes her eyes, and takes a deep breath. “Whatever you decide you want to do, I’m okay with that. If we’re just friends, I’m happy to do that. If it’s more, great! But I want to go at whatever pace you want, okay?” 

Cady nods. “Okay.” She thinks for a second. “Can I… still cuddle with you right now, in a non-romantic way?”

Regina laughs slightly. “Sure, Cady. We can cuddle in a non-romantic way. Come here, let’s adjust. The way you’re sitting can’t be comfortable for your hips.”

Cady blushes. Regina’s right. She’s been weirdly leaning against Regina, with her legs twisted up underneath her. Slowly, she extracts herself, hissing as her legs uncramp. She stands up, looking at Regina, unsure of what to do next. 

“Come sit here,” Regina says, patting her lap. “Put your legs here,” she gestures to the spot on the couch next to her, where Cady had been sitting before. As Cady settles in, Regina guides her to put her arms around Regina’s waist, before Regina tucks Cady’s head against her shoulder with one hand. She slides her hands back down to hold Cady comfortably, taking a deep breath once they’re finally relaxed. 

“Thank you,” Cady says quietly. She looks at Regina’s other shoulder, her shirt still damp from where Cady was crying. “Sorry I got your shoulder all wet.” 

“Stop apologizing,” Regina tells her. “I told you, I don’t mind. I’m happy to help.” 

“You promise this isn’t too much?”

“It’s not,” Regina assures her. “And it’s helping you, isn’t it?”

Cady nods.

“Then I’m happy to do it.” Regina takes in another deep breath. Honeysuckle and vanilla fills her nostrils, and her heart constricts. 

Okay, maybe it is too much. But it’s helping Cady, so she certainly isn’t going to do anything to stop it. 

“Let me get this straight,” Gretchen says, pacing around Regina’s office. It’s the following day, and as soon as Regina got in from her typical coffee shop time, Gretchen and Karen practically cornered Regina in her office, demanding to know why she’d left early yesterday. She was clearly upset when she left, but she didn’t call or text either of them last night, which was highly unusual for Regina. 

Gretchen holds up a finger. “You left work early because Cady called.”

Regina nods, sitting at her big executive desk. She just explained everything that happened after she left yesterday, but she left a few key parts of their conversation out. She wants to tell them, she’s just not sure how .

Gretchen puts up a second finger. “She told you about an insane revenge plot that she, Janis ‘Imi’ike, and Damian Hubbard came up with in high school.” Another nod, and then another finger. “You brushed that off by jumping into an ice cold shower.” A nod; a finger goes up. “She then told you about a fight she got into with both of them, and then cried in your lap for like, an hour.” Regina nods again, and Gretchen puts up another finger. “You then made her a home cooked meal and drove her home?”

“Yeah, that about sums it up,” Regina says.

“What did you make her?” Karen asks, her eyes twinkling.

“That lemon chicken pasta dish I like.”

“G, I love you, but why ?” Gretchen asks, redirecting to the important questions. “That shit with the Caffeine bars or whatever is insane .” 

“ Kalteen . And, yeah, I mean, I’m pissed about that,” Regina admits, “but not at her. She stopped it from happening. I’m pissed at Janis .”

“Okay, but that still doesn’t explain why you did all that,” Gretchen says. “I don’t think I would have been able to bounce back from that like you did.” 

Regina just shrugs. “She needed me. I did what I had to do.”

“Gina,” Karen says quietly, sitting forward in her seat, “I know you feel guilty and all, but…”

“It’s not that,” Regina cuts her off. “Or, I guess, it’s not all just that.” 

“What is it then?” Gretchen asks, stopping her pacing, putting her hands on the back of Karen’s chair. “Because I know you, Regina, probably better than anyone else on Earth, except maybe Karen, and I don’t understand why you’re doing all this.”

Regina shifts, sitting up straighter in her chair. She shuffles some papers on her desk, avoiding eye contact with her friends. “I did it because I’m a lesbian,” she says, as calmly and as matter-of-factly as she can manage, “and I have had feelings for Cady Heron since we were 16 years old.” 

The stunned silence blankets the room. Anxiety wells in Regina's chest, and she can feel herself slip back into old defenses. She wants to snap at them, but she holds her tongue. She glances up at her friends, giving them a pointed look. 

Gretchen blinks, the eye contact bringing her back to Earth. “Oh my gosh, Regina. I'm so proud of you.” 

“Wait, I thought we already knew Regina was gay,” Karen says, tilting her head. 

Gretchen’s face immediately bunches up, but to her relief, Regina laughs lightly. “I mean, I know you both know my dating history. I was just in denial about the identity part for a really long time. But recently, I have finally been able to admit it. To myself. And to Cady.”

Gretchen’s expression falls. “You told Cady ?” 

“Over a week ago,” Regina admits. “When we had our big talk.” 

Karen gives her that slightly stunned, yet blank stare. “G, what ? Why ?”

Regina folds her hands across the papers on her desk. “Because she asked me why I did what I did in high school.” 

Gretchen stares at her for a long moment, processing. “You… you lashed out at Cady and sent her into a depression she’s still getting out of because you had feelings for her.”

Regina opens her mouth, and then closes it again. “Yes,” she says flatly, with a single nod.

“You told her this last week.” 

“Yes.” 

“And she’s okay with that?” 

Regina looks down at the desk again. “I wasn’t sure, at first. She said she accepted my apology but didn’t forgive me yet, which is fair. I offered friendship and she wanted that too, so we’ve been working on that. And then last night…”

“Regina,” Gretchen says, dread in her voice, “what happened last night?”

“Nothing happened ,” Regina assures her. “We just talked . And she asked me if I still had feelings for her.” Regina gets quiet.

“What did you say?” Karen asks. 

“I told her I did,” Regina says, as calmly as she can manage. “And she told me… that she had feelings in high school too. That she didn’t understand them at the time, because… well, sexuality, and all that.” She curls her hands into fists, digging her nails into her palms. “Which, is not information I probably should have shared. Again .” She groans, dropping her head into her hands. 

“G, we aren’t going to tell anyone,” Karen assures her, shooting Gretchen a look. “Right, Gretch?”

“Of course,” Gretchen nods seriously. “I don’t play around with stuff like that. That’s not gossip.” 

Karen looks back at Regina. “Did she… say if she still has feelings?” 

Regina shakes her head. “She said she doesn’t know what she wants yet. I told her I’d be happy with whatever she wants to do, and I’d go at whatever pace she wanted.”

“ Would you be happy, though?” Gretchen asks. Both of the other girls’ eyes jump to her. She shifts uncomfortably where she stands. “With all the love in my heart, Regina, you don’t really do well with… rejection.” 

Regina makes a face, but it’s only for a second. She shrugs. “Okay, I get where you’re coming from. What happened with Rebecca was years ago. I’ve grown a lot since then.”

“I’m not just talking about Rebecca, G,” Gretchen says cautiously. “I just don’t want to see either of you get hurt.” 

“Which is why I’m letting her set the pace,” Regina points out.

“But what if she just wants to be friends? What then?” 

Regina just looks at Gretchen. “Then we’ll just be friends.” She closes her eyes, and takes a deep breath. “Gretch, Kare, I love you guys. You know that. I know you’re concerned, but I need you to just trust me on this. I will be okay, whatever happens.” 

Gretchen sighs, giving a little nod. “Okay. Just make sure you’re taking care of yourself and not just her, okay?”

Karen nods along with her girlfriend. “She’s got a good point. You tend to do that too.” 

Regina laughs lightly, closing her eyes again. “I promise . I will take care of myself. Now, I’m very sorry to kick you both out, but I do have to prep for this meeting I rescheduled.” 

Gretchen huffs, earning her a look from Regina. Gretchen waves her hand. “I trust you, Regina, even if I don’t think it’s the best idea.” 

“Look, I need someone in our corner, okay? Cady’s mom hates me, Cady’s therapist is trying to talk her out of it at every opportunity, and I just found out Cady’s only friends tried to ruin my life back in high school. And now she’s cut them off too. And I get why people are concerned for her . But she’s capable of taking care of herself, and so am I. I need someone to believe us on that. Please .”

Gretchen and Karen watch Regina for several long seconds, before Gretchen nods. “Okay, Regina. I really do trust you.”

“Me too!” Karen says with a little nod of her own. “Should I block Janis and Damian on social media?”

Regina waves her hand. “Do what you want. Ask Cady if you want. That’s not my decision to make. And, seriously , I have to prep for this meeting.” 

Gretchen and Karen take their leave, walking back to their offices, which are right next door to each other down the hall. 

“Do you think she’s really going to be okay if it doesn’t go the way she wants?” Karen asks softly.

Gretchen sighs. “I really, really hope so.”

Chapter Text

It takes three days for Damian to reach out to Cady again. He texts her on Friday afternoon, after she's gotten off of work, telling her he's thought long and hard about what he wants to say, and wants to call and apologize. 

Cady spends a good hour debating whether or not to actually call him, but inevitably, she does. It's just a regular phone call this time, no FaceTime, which she's relieved about. She's not sure that she’d be able to look at his face without getting angry again. 

“Hi,” Damian greets softly, no pet name included. Cady stiffens up, knowing that means he's very serious. He's always got a million different pet names, for pretty much everyone in his life. 

“Hey,” Cady replies, trying to remain as neutral as possible. 

“Thanks for calling,” Damian says. “I, um, I thought a lot about what you said. And while I still have opinions, I realized you were right. I haven't been very fair to you, and I’m sorry.” 

Cady lets out a shaky breath. “Thank you.”

“Of course. I just… Cady, you know I love and care about you very much, right?” 

“Of course I know that, Damian,” Cady replies. “And I know you’ve been doing it because you're still trying to protect me and take care of me, even after all these years. And I do appreciate that. It's just at some point, you have to let me prove that I am better so I can actually be better.” 

“I know,” Damian sighs. “I know. I should have given you the chance on a lot of things, and I also should have told you about Matt.”

Cady lets out a small breath. “Yeah, that one stung a lot.”

“I know. There's been a couple relationships I haven't told you about. At first it was because, well, you know me. I'm dramatic as hell . As it turns out, so have been a lot of my relationships. I didn't want you to worry about me.”

“Damian,” Cady says quietly. “I’m always gonna worry about you. And Janis. You guys are my friends. Now tell me about Matt!” 

Damian is quiet for a second. “Well, we’ve been steady for almost a year now. We met on Broadway, which, I know. That's the gayest thing ever .” 

Cady laughs. “Of course you did.” 

“He was one of the dancers in the show I was working on. A couple of my coworkers spent the better part of a few months trying to hook us up. He had just gotten out of a bad breakup, so he wanted to take things slow for a little while. So we did. I mean, really, we’ve been together for almost a year and a half, but we weren't together together until about a year ago.” 

“What’s he like?” Cady asks. 

“ Super sweet. Like oh my God, nicest guy I've ever met. Super thoughtful too. Whenever I'm having a bad day, he always knows exactly what to say and do to make me feel better. We’ve been living together for a couple months now and it just works so well. I love all his little quirks, even stuff that usually annoys me in other people. He can cook, and dance, and sing , and we’ll just sing together for fun sometimes. When I’m not on vocal rest, anyway.” 

“That's adorable,” Cady smiles. “It sounds like he makes you really happy.” 

“He does.” 

“Then I'm really happy for you both, and I really hope I can meet him one day. Maybe soon.”

“I'd like that. You'd get along great.”

“Does Janis like him?” 

Damian hesitates. “She does. She thinks he's good for me. But, uh, Cady, about Janis…”

“She's still mad, isn't she?” 

“ Mad is a… gentle way to put it.” 

Cady closes her eyes and sighs. “I mean, I shouldn't be that surprised. She hates Regina.”

“For good reason, I might add.”

“Damian…”

“Cady, listen. I agree with you that I need to trust you more. I agree that I haven't really let me see how much better you've gotten. But I still have my opinions and I still have my fears and I am very worried about you talking to Regina.”

Cady takes a deep breath. “Okay. Lay it on me, and then let me tell you how it's been going, okay?” 

“That's fair.” Damian takes a deep breath of his own. “Cady, I am extremely worried about Regina being that close. I know people can grow and change, but Cady, this is Regina we’re talking about. I watched firsthand when she destroyed Janis’s life in middle school, and yours in high school. I know that people are capable of change, but I just… I don’t trust her, Cady. I trust you, but I don’t trust her , and I don’t know that I ever will.” 

“I didn’t think I would either,” Cady admits, “when she first started showing up. And, no , she wasn’t stalking me.” 

“I will refrain from making any stalking comments,” Damian promises. “Go on.” 

“I was extremely cautious at first. I spoke to her as little as possible. I followed my script for customer interactions to a T . Straight from my employee handbook. I knew that if she said something, or snapped at me, or accused me of anything, she would look like the psycho yelling at a barista who was literally just doing their job. I may only have my GED, but I’m not dumb .”

“Cady Heron, you have never been dumb a day in your life,” Damian interrupts. “GED or PhD. You are incredibly intelligent.” 

“My point ,” Cady continues, “is that she’s been earning my trust back. Bit by bit. And I know no one else really gets that. No one else knew it was happening for those five months, which, I mean, yeah. That’s on me. But I don’t regret keeping that a secret. I know that everyone is just trying to look out for me. It’s just been so long since I’ve been allowed to look after myself.” 

Damian hums. “Okay, I can get that. I guess my main concern is that I don’t really know what she’s been doing that has been building back your trust. Like, I know you said it wasn’t your story to tell, but honey, vagueness and Regina George don’t really mix. We’re all worried she’s got bad intentions, and it doesn’t really help that we don’t know what she’s even telling you they are.” 

Cady pauses for a moment. “I had therapy yesterday. I talked about it a lot with my therapist. She’s the only one I’ve told all the details too, and Regina knows that and is okay with it. Thalia, well, she thinks I need to be careful, but she doesn’t think Regina appears to be malicious. Overly optimistic, perhaps, but not malicious.” 

“I have no idea what that even means ,” Damian sighs. “Can you tell me anything ?” 

Cady thinks for several long moments. “Can anyone else hear this call?” 

“No, I’m home alone. Matt’s at work. Janis has been holed up in her art studio for three days.” 

“I am going to tell you,” Cady says cautiously, “but you cannot tell a single other person these details. Not Janis, not Matt, certainly not my mother. This is you and me, and no one else .” 

“Understood,” Damian replies instantly. “You and me. No one else.” 

“Regina told me she finally understood why she did what she did in high school.” Cady hesitates, not loving the way she feels about telling him this, yet, at the same time, needs someone who isn’t her therapist to also know. “She had feelings for me that she didn’t understand and didn’t want to acknowledge. So instead she lashed out. She never tried to use that to justify what she did. She knows it was wrong and has apologized literally more times than I can count.” 

“Wait,” Damian says, “back up. Feelings?”

“ Gay feelings, Damian,” Cady sighs. 

“Regina George. Had gay feelings. For you.”

“Which is why I have been so vague about everything,” Cady huffs. “It’s not really my story to tell. I feel really bad about even telling you this right now. And that’s why you cannot tell anyone else.” 

“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph,” Damian mutters under his breath. “Does she still have feelings for you?”

“Yes.”

“Cady… What’s the end goal here?” 

“I don’t know,” Cady admits. “I’ve been very honest about that too. I did some processing of my own and realized I had a crush on her , too, back in high school. I was crushing on her and Aaron at the same time.”

“No wonder why you always looked like you might actually combust whenever you saw them kissing in the hallways.”

Cady ignores his comment. “I just never really processed it because well. Everything . But I also didn’t realize that’s what those feelings were back then because I didn’t really know I liked girls.” 

“You like girls?” Damian asks, some surprise in his voice. 

“Apparently,” Cady shrugs. “Listen, I’m still trying to… figure all of it out. And I’ve been very clear with Regina that I don’t know what I want. She’s been very kind and very patient and has repeatedly said that she’s fine with however things end up. If we’re just friends, that’s okay. If we get to the point of a relationship, great, but she’s not expecting me to get there or anything.”

“Cady…” 

“It’s not like that,” Cady sighs. “I’m not worried about it. She’s my friend . We are rebuilding our friendship . We’re being open and honest with each other about everything and it’s going well. I’m happy .” 

“I trust you , Cady, and I am very glad that you’re happy. I just don’t trust her. I don’t trust that she actually will be okay with things if you decide against it.” 

“I was the first person she told,” Cady tells him, “that she’s a lesbian. She’s dated women, mostly one night stands, but she’s never labeled herself. That was that big talk we had last week. I didn’t even bring up my own feelings until the other day, after our call.” 

“You talked to her after our call?”

“I was really upset, Damian. I still kind of am, about a lot of things. I felt bad for yelling at you, but I stand by what I said. The only person in my life right now who hasn’t been trying to talk me out of this is Regina. Of course I went to her.” 

“And you told her about your own feelings.” 

“My old feelings,” Cady corrects. She can feel herself starting to get frustrated with this line of questioning. She takes a slow, deep breath. “Damian, you weren’t there that day, when that boy walked into my work. It was like looking at a ghost . I froze up, worse than I have in years . She immediately jumped in, brought me home, sat with me until my mom got there. She’s been nothing but kind, supportive, and caring this whole time. She is constantly asking me if certain things are okay. She’s extremely considerate and a completely different person from the last time I knew her. I see little glimpses of the Regina from high school under the surface, but it’s never directed at me. She’ll yell if someone cuts her off in traffic, but then she’ll immediately apologize for yelling. She gets frustrated with people, but walks away if she needs to. Hell, I told her about the revenge plot and she took a minute, walked away, came back, and was fine .”

“Pause, pause, pause,” Damian says immediately. “You told her what ?” 

Cady takes another deep breath. “I told her about the failed revenge plot from high school. She was angry, but not at me. Mostly at you and Janis, but mostly Janis, I think. I told you. We’re being open and honest about everything . That includes the past.” 

“Cady, I… I want to trust you, so badly, but holy shit, what the hell, girl?” 

“Janis said it herself the other day. My first friendship with Regina was built on a lie. I’m not doing that again.” 

“She could have hurt you!” 

“She didn’t ,” Cady insists. “Damian, I’m not going to argue about this. I told you, she handled it very well . I would not have told her if I thought it would put me in danger. She’s a different person now. She’d be the first to tell you she’s done a lot of therapy.” 

Damian is quiet for a few moments. “Did she tell Gretchen and Karen?”

“I think so. She told me she told them about our conversation the next day, so, I guess? She was more focused on the coming out part, though.” 

“They both blocked me and Janis on socials,” Damian tells her. “And Matt, even. I thought it was because we found the picture on Karen’s Insta, but…”

“It’s possible,” Cady shrugs. “I haven’t seen them since dinner that night, so I don’t know.” 

Damian sighs again. “Cady, I won’t argue with you about it, but I think this is a really bad idea.” 

“I know,” Cady replies. “You and everyone else.”

“That doesn’t alarm you?” Damian asks. “That everyone around you thinks you’re making a mistake?”

“Yes and no. There’s a part of me that’s constantly panicking about it. But I also know that everyone who thinks it’s a bad idea doesn’t know current Regina. They only know past Regina. I can’t blame them for not trusting her. They haven’t seen what I’ve seen.” 

“Just… promise me you’ll be careful, okay? And that you’ll look out for yourself?” 

“I will,” Cady promises. “And I’ll keep you updated on things, but you still have to keep it to yourself until I say otherwise.” 

“Of course,” Damian says. “I really do hope it all works out, you know. I do want you to be happy, whatever that outcome may be.”

“Thanks, Damian. I know you’re always looking out for me.” Cady is quiet for a few moments. “You know, I don’t think I’ve really thanked you for everything you’ve done for me. Especially back then.”

“Honey, you don’t have to thank me. That’s just what I do for the people I love.” 

“I know. But it’s important I thank you anyways. So, thank you .” 

“You’re very welcome, Cady.” There’s a beeping on the line, followed by Damian cursing under his breath. “Shit, Janis is calling me. I gotta take this, she’s been… well, you know Jan.” 

“Of course. Take care of our girl, yeah?”

“Always,” Damian says, and Cady can almost hear his smile.

The pair exchange their goodbyes, and Cady hangs up the phone. She drops it against her chest, staring up at the ceiling in her bedroom. She’s so tired of talking about this all the time, but she knows she needs to tell Regina. 

Cady - 2:56pm

So, Damian called me.

Cady - 2:56pm

Well, he texted me, and I called him, I guess. ANYWAYS he apologized and stuff for the other day. We talked for a while and he’s trusting me more now. I told him about some of the stuff you’ve done the last few weeks to try and show how you’ve changed and he seems to be better with it for now. He said he doesn’t trust you though so take that for what you will.

Cady - 2:57pm

Sorry if this is a lot. I’m just really tired of all this back and forth and I’m SO tired of talking out loud about it so I’m trying to make this as quick as I can.

Regina - 2:59pm

No need to apologize, I get it. I’m glad he apologized, at least. I’m not that surprised he still doesn’t really trust me but at this point I’m not so sure how much I trust him either. And I know he’s your friend and all, but I’m still hung up on the whole revenge plot thing.

Regina - 2:59pm

Which I still don’t blame you for at all, by the way. Just as a reminder. 

Cady - 3:00pm

I know. I don’t blame you for being mad.

Regina - 3:00pm

Did he say anything about Janis?

Cady - 3:00pm

She’s been raging ever since our phone call the other day. She’s my friend, but I just can’t deal with all that anger right now.

Regina - 3:00pm

Figures.

Regina - 3:01pm

Her raging, not you.

Cady - 3:01pm

G, I know you’re not saying that stuff about me, it’s okay.

Regina - 3:01pm

I just like to be clear. I haven’t always been.

Regina - 3:01pm

Anyways, I’m glad he called and apologized. Do you feel good about it?

Cady - 3:02pm

I feel better. I don’t know if good is the word I’d pick though. I’m literally so tired of all the back and forth with everyone about all of this.

Regina - 3:02pm

I’m sorry it’s all so complicated.

Regina - 3:02pm

I have something more positive for you, if you want.

Cady - 3:03pm

Yes of course!!!

Regina - 3:03pm

Gretchen and Karen just invited me out to a dinner tonight with them and asked me to invite you along too.

Regina - 3:03pm

It’s a little bit more upscale but I can get your bill.

Cady - 3:04pm

I mean I’d love to, I just don’t think I have anything nice enough to wear.

Regina - 3:04pm

You could come by my place after I get out of work and I can let you borrow something.

Regina - 3:04pm

If you want.

Cady - 3:05pm 

Gee, me coming over for you to give me clothes. Where have I heard that one before? :P

Regina - 3:05pm

You still prefer emoticons over emojis???

Cady - 3:06pm

Some things never change ;)

Cady - 3:06pm

*:)

Regina - 3:06pm

So, what do you think?

Cady - 3:07pm

Sure, I’d love to go!

Cady - 3:07pm

What time do you get off work?

Regina - 3:08pm 

I have one more meeting today that shouldn’t run too long. I can let you know but I could leave a little early and come pick you up around 4-4:30 maybe?

Cady - 3:08pm

Sounds like a plan! I’ll see you then :)

Regina - 3:09pm

See you then!! 😁

Cady drops her phone back onto her chest, staring up at the ceiling again. Instead of feeling the frustration she felt earlier, she’s smiling to herself. 

It's incredible how quickly a conversation with Regina can change her mood.

Regina texts Cady once her meeting is over, giving her a time estimate. Cady texts her mom, letting her know where she’ll be tonight, and that she’ll keep her location turned on, one of the “conditions” Dr. Heron established for Cady spending time with Regina. 

It’s not like her mom could stop her, really, but she's found it much easier to just keep her location turned on and listen to her mother say, “I think this is a bad idea,” every time she sees Regina. 

Like clockwork, the response text comes in. 

Mom - 3:47pm

Okay. I still think this is a bad idea. When will you be home?

Cady - 3:48pm

I know. Not sure but I'll let you know.

Cady heads down to the lobby after texting her mom, waiting the last ten minutes downstairs. She’s a bit more anxious than normal, fidgeting with the hem of her shirt. She’s going to Regina’s to pick out clothes to go out to a fancy dinner with her rich friends. It feels so high school, and for Cady especially, that’s terrifying. 

It’s fine , she tells herself. Everything is going to be fine . 

Regina pulls up a couple of minutes past 4pm, which had been her estimate. Cady got in the car, greeted by a smile from her friend.

“Sorry I’m late, there was a really old lady crossing the sidewalk in front of the exit of my garage,” Regina tells her. “She took forever . Almost ran her over.”

Cady shoots her a look, but Regina just grins. 

“I’m kidding! I was very patient.” 

Cady laughs, rolling her eyes. Immediately, she feels more at ease. This isn’t high school, and this isn’t high school Regina. 

“ Sure ,” Cady drawls sarcastically, a smile still on her face. “How was your day?” she asks Regina, pivoting to small talk. 

“Decent,” Regina shrugs as she turns the corner onto the next street. “We had a big meeting today about the next Chicago Fashion Week. We missed the deadline this year, but we’ll be in it next year for sure.” 

“I didn’t even know Chicago had a fashion week,” Cady admits. 

“Neither did I, until the opportunity arose to move here.”

“What did happen that led you to Chicago anyway?” 

Regina hummed. “New York is a great place for fashion, obviously. We made a lot of great progress there. But we couldn’t quite break out in the way I wanted the label to go. We’re great , obviously, I’m running things, but being great is average in New York. The Board recommended we look to move to another major city and try to make ourselves outstanding there instead.” 

“Makes sense,” Cady shrugs. “Why Chicago?”

“Well, the main options were Chicago, L.A., or Boston.” Regina makes a face. “I hate Boston. I’ve never had a good experience there. L.A. held too many of the same issues as New York. We would have faced the same issues. More influencers, I guess, but not worth the trade off.” Regina hummed. “Someone pitched the idea of Miami, but I turned that down. I can’t stand Florida. Too many old people.”

“More of them to run over with your car,” Cady says, deadpan. 

Regina bursts out laughing, grinning from ear to ear. “Yeah, I guess so. But Chicago called to me, so I made the decision to come back here.”

“Was there anything specific about Chicago that called you?” 

“The idea of home , I think,” Regina shrugged. “Like, I've only been back to Evanston once since coming here, but it feels… I don't know. It's close enough that it reminds me of the good stuff, but far enough to avoid all the bad stuff.” 

“You've only been back once?”

Regina nods. “My parents divorced a couple years after I graduated. It was… messy. Very messy. Long story short, he had a whole secret family for like, uh, a decade or so?”

“Holy shit ,” Cady whispered. 

Regina laughs a little. Cady doesn't swear often, she never has, so she knows her words have had the appropriate impact. “Yeah, crazy stuff. Anyways, he had all these non-cheating clauses in the prenup because he was convinced my mother was going to cheat on him at some point. Ironic. Anyways, he got obliterated in the settlement. Last I heard, he was off with his other family, but who knows. I haven't spoken to him since the divorce.” 

“ Wow ,” Cady mumbles. “That's crazy. I'm so sorry.”

“Don't be,” Regina shrugs. “He was hardly around. Barely any difference. Anyways, my mom got a ton of money. She sold the house, which she also got in the settlement, and spends most of her time living on cruise ships and stuff. We talk sometimes, but I mostly just see what she's up to on social media. With her gone, there's no real reason for me to go back to Evanston.”

“But you did once.”

“I did. After we had that big talk. I, um, I went to go visit his grave. For the first time since graduating. I apologized to him and stuff.” Regina gets quiet. 

“I'm sure he appreciates it,” Cady says, putting a hand on Regina’s knee. “And I'm sure he's proud of you.”

Regina smiles gently. “Thanks, Cady. I sure hope so.” She hums quietly. “Enough about Evanston. I'm happy to be in Chicago.” 

“I'm happy you're here too,” Cady says, squeezing Regina’s knee. 

Regina’s cheeks tint pink, but they've arrived at her garage, so she’s forced to turn and look out the window so she can swipe her key card to get in. Cady pulls her hand away, letting it fall into her own lap. Maybe that was too far. She's so unsure of where the lines are for them. 

Being led to Regina’s apartment feels much better this time, since she's not seconds away from sobbing again. The building is very nice, with all sorts of top-of-the-line technology. They have to go through a series of elevators and hallways to get to Regina’s apartment, which looks just as pristine as last time. 

“I didn't get a chance to give you a proper tour last time,” Regina says, taking Cady’s hand. “Let me show you around.”

Cady’s already seen the living room, which, of course, is filled with expensive furniture and various art pieces. Regina has a huge TV, which isn't surprising at all. What is a bit surprising is the large DVD collection on display underneath the TV, and the wide variety of movies it contained. 

“I finally branched out from just romcoms,” Regina explains. “I’ve learned I actually like horror movies a lot. There's a couple I'd like to show you sometime, if you're interested.”

Cady makes a face. “I hate jumpscares.” 

“I'll have to double check them then.” She squeezes Cady’s hand. Cady smiles softly, and the tour continues. 

Cady did see Regina’s kitchen last time, hanging out at her table while Regina had cooked that delicious dinner. She’d been a little too out of it to appreciate just how nice all of her appliances were, but that isn't exactly shocking either. 

What does surprise Cady is that this time, instead of basically just wine, oat milk, and water (which, in itself, had been mildly concerning, but Cady hadn't fully processed that until now), Regina has stocked the fridge with a bunch of different non-alcoholic drink options. The realization makes Cady’s heart flutter, in a way that she isn't sure was excitement or anxiety.

Next on the tour is the bathroom, which has the fanciest looking shower Cady’s ever seen. It's a brief stop, mostly just to show Cady where the bathroom is for when she needs it. 

Regina leads Cady to her bedroom, which was much more grown up than Cady remembers her high school bedroom being. There's still an absolutely massive king bed, which takes up a significant amount of space in the room. It's clear to Cady that Regina’s bedroom is no longer her main entertainment space for friends, which makes sense, given that she has her own living room now. The space is less social, more personal . It’s smaller than her old bedroom, which makes sense. A luxury apartment is still an apartment, and Regina’s childhood home was a literal mansion . In her new room, aside from the bed, there's some bedside tables, a vanity with a huge makeup collection, as to be expected, and a single lounge chair with a book resting in it. 

She leads Cady to the walk-in closet, which, while not as immense as her high school bedroom’s closet, it's about the same size as Cady’s entire bedroom in her apartment. The realization makes Cady’s heart pound, another little reminder in the ways that their lives are so different. 

But this is something that's always been different about them. Regina has always been filthy rich. Cady’s family has never been explicitly poor , but they definitely were always in a very different tax bracket from the Georges. This isn't something that happened because of Cady’s mental health.

Regina brings Cady over to an ottoman in the closet, gesturing for her to sit down. She starts rooting through clothes, rambling to Cady about some different options she’s been thinking about since they were texting earlier. She tells Cady facts about some of the clothes she sorts through, where she got certain things, what brands they're from, things like that. It doesn't hold the same sort of braggy tone that Cady felt when Regina did this in high school. That was all about showing off. Regina had been all confidence back then. Now, as she rambles away, she seems almost… nervous? It's very strange, nervousness from Regina George, but it's a welcome reminder that she's not untouchable. 

After a few more minutes, Regina puts a few different options out on top of a dresser. She holds them up, showing them off to Cady one by one, trying to see if any of them spoke to her. 

It's clear to Cady that Regina’s style really has changed. Sure, she could tell it had adapted to some degree over the last few weeks, Cady is a little bit stunned to notice how little pink there is in the closet. Most of the clothes are neutral tones, with occasional pops of color. There's definitely a whole pink section , but it doesn't permeate everything the way it once had. 

It's also clear in the outfits Regina has picked out for her. There’s mostly dress options, but they couldn’t be described as extremely feminine . Regina has a few options of pants and tops, but she admits she’s unsure how well the pants will fit her, because Cady's so much shorter than she is.

Cady agrees to try on a couple of the dresses first, but only if she's not going to be the only one in a dress. Regina flashes her a smile, and promises she’ll pick out a dress too, if that's what Cady goes with. They're all a little big on her, between the height difference and the toll Cady’s depression took on her body physically. Regina is a bit stumped, remembering them being closer in size back in high school, but she's a fashion designer, dammit! She can figure out a way to make it work!

There’s one black dress that fits better than most, but it doesn't really sit right on Cady’s waist. Regina digs around until she finds a chunky belt that she wraps around Cady’s middle, and it all comes together. It's just classy enough to work well, but not so fancy that Cady feels bad borrowing it. 

Cady still can't walk in heels very well, which doesn't really surprise Regina. Regina finds a pair of kitten heels that work well with her outfit (by some stroke of luck, Cady's shoe size is pretty much the only thing about her that hasn't changed since high school, so they don’t have to make any adjustments there). 

It takes Regina nearly as long to find a bunch of accessories as it did the dress, most of which Cady claims aren't necessary but Regina insists on lending her. It's all cute stuff, but definitely all individually worth way more than Cady makes in a single week. 

It really reminds Cady of high school, which makes her heart constrict and her stomach flip and twist. This isn't high school, she has to remind herself, and as much as the actions may feel like it, the emotions… don't. 

In the few short months that Cady had been friends with Regina in high school, Regina lending her clothes had been a form of entertainment for the Plastics, primarily Regina. To dress up the dorky homeschooled kid in skimpy clothes and watch her stumble her way across a room in heels had been funny . 

The way Regina looks at her now, it isn't like that. She isn't deciding which of her clothes would look most out of place on Cady. She’s doing her absolute best to make Cady look good , and when Cady finally catches a glimpse of herself in the full-length mirror, she is amazed to see just how well Regina has succeeded. 

“Wow,” Cady says, staring at herself. 

“You look incredible,” Regina smiles, looking a bit proud of herself. 

“Thank you, for the clothes and your help.” 

Regina waves her hand. “Of course. I'm not one of the country’s top up-and-coming designers for nothing.”

Cady cracks a smile. There's the ego she expects from Regina. “I don't know if I'd call you up-and-coming,” Cady tells her, turning around to face her. “You own a very successful label.” 

Regina hums. “I'll stop considering myself up-and-coming when George is sold alongside Gucci and Versace .” 

“Haven't those been around for, like, ever?” 

“Gucci was founded in the 1920s. Versace’s only been around since the 70s,” Regina informs her. “I’ll give you a full rundown on luxury fashion history at some point.” 

Cady smiles. “Honestly? I'm actually looking forward to it.”

Regina already has an outfit in mind for herself, so it takes her nearly half the time to get dressed. She keeps her promise and picks a dress of her own. It's primarily black too, but with light pink accents around certain parts of the fabric. It’s a little bit longer than Cady’s dress, but not by much. 

Regina grabs a pair of heeled boots she loves, before heading out of the closet to find Cady sitting at the vanity, starting on her makeup with stuff she brought from home. She stops in the middle of putting on her foundation, staring wide eyed at Regina in the mirror of the vanity. 

“What do you think?” Regina asks, trying to sound as calm as she can. She knows she looks good, but the way Cady is staring at her right now makes her heart beat fast and her words stumble together. 

“You look incredible , G. Wow .”

Regina smiles at the nickname. Cady never used to call her that back in the day. That was something only Gretchen or Karen ever said. Cady never really seemed comfortable enough back then, always a little on edge and nervous around Regina. Now here she was, calling her G and complimenting her left and right. She’d done it a couple times over text earlier, but hearing her say it now did something to Regina.

Get it together, Regina . 

Regina blinks and smiles. “Thanks!” She walks over and puts her shoes next to the door, before slipping back into the closet and coming out carrying a little ottoman. She plops it down next to Cady by the vanity, who scoots the stool over. 

“I never really got too deep into makeup,” Cady admits to her. “I just know some basic stuff.” 

“I could do it up a little, if you'd like,” Regina offers. “Like, for you.”

Cady smiles softly. “Sure. Do your stuff first though.” 

Regina grins back, and gets to work. She puts some music on, just some soft pop, and finds Cady humming along to some of it as she does her eyeliner. 

Regina can't help herself from sneaking glances in the mirror. Cady is so genuinely beautiful, it hurts. She doesn't seem to notice Regina looking at her (although, after the admission that she was fully aware of Regina staring at her for five months, Regina isn't so sure she trusts her instincts on this anymore) as she applies her makeup. 

“Don't do your lips,” Regina tells her. “I’ve got the perfect shade for you.” 

“Okay,” Cady says, continuing to work on her eyes. 

Shit , Regina thinks. She knows I was staring at her lips . 

Cady doesn't seem to mind though, or, at least, if she does, she doesn't show it. Regina focuses on herself again, trying very hard to get through her routine as quickly (yet as pristinely) as she can. 

Cady finishes before Regina does, so she fiddles with one of the bracelets Regina gave her. Regina does her best to go quickly, but it's still a process . It's not helped by the fact that Regina’s eyes can't stop flicking over to Cady every few seconds, the shared mirror making it very hard to focus. 

When Regina is finally done, she turns on the ottoman to face Cady. “Alright, let's see,” she says, as Cady turns to face her. 

Cady’s eyes widen a bit as she takes in Regina’s face. Regina doesn't miss the way her jaw drops open a bit, and the way she quickly tries to recover. Regina offers a tiny smile in return, before trying her best to actually focus on Cady’s makeup and not just how damn beautiful she is. 

“I can give you some good wings and do your lips if you want,” Regina offers. “But you already look phenomenal. There's not much left for me to do.”

She catches the way Cady blushes lightly. “Sure,” Cady says. 

Regina takes Cady’s eyeliner, wanting everything to match, and gets to work. It doesn't take much, and Cady sits there, perfectly still, while Regina lightly touches her face and focuses very hard on anything but how soft Cady’s skin feels beneath her fingers. 

“Oh, yeah, I forgot mascara,” Cady tells her. “I guess I missed it when grabbing everything at my apartment earlier.” 

“Wait, really?” Regina asks, shocked. “Your eyelashes just look like that?” 

Cady blushes. “I, uh, I guess so.”

Regina smiles. “I've got just the thing.” She turns, rooting around in her makeup collection until she pulls out a small tube of mascara. “This stuff is pretty minimal,” she tells her as she applies the brush to Cady’s eyelashes. When she's done, she looks softly at Cady, convincing herself she's admiring her work, and not the way Cady’s looking back at her. “ Perfect .”

Regina's eyes drift down to Cady’s lips, and she's jolted back to reality. “Lipstick,” she says, mostly to herself, as she turns and hopes she isn't blushing too badly. She opens up a drawer in the vanity, revealing dozens of lipsticks, organized by shade. 

“Holy - did you raid a Sephora?” Cady asks, eyes wide. 

Regina laughs as she pulls out the tube she’s looking for. “Nah, although they do give me huge discounts and free product on the regular.” She flips her hair over her shoulder. “Perks of having three million followers on Instagram.”

“ Three million ?” Cady asks, her jaw dropping. “Regina, what ? You just called yourself up-and-coming, like, fifteen minutes ago!” 

Regina waves her hand. “Sit still while I put this on you.” Cady frowns, but neutralizes her face as Regina goes to apply the lipstick. “My company and my brand are two different things. My company is the same as my label; Regina George . But those are my clothes . Me, the person known as Regina George, that’s my brand . I’m a designer and an influencer.” Regina pulls back, proud of herself for remaining calm and talking while putting the lipstick on Cady.

“And CEO,” Cady mutters before rubbing her lips together to properly spread it. “And somehow you spend, like, nine hours a week, just sitting in a coffee shop.” 

“I’m a woman of many talents,” Regina smirks. “This is totally your shade, by the way. You can keep this if you want.” She extends the closed lipstick tube to her, but Cady shakes her head.

“I can’t take that.”

“Why not?”

“Regina, I…” Cady sighs, straightening up on the stool a bit. “I very much appreciate everything you’ve done lately, but I feel really weird about taking your things.” 

“You aren’t taking it. I’m giving it to you.” Cady gives her a look, so Regina relents. “Okay, okay. At least keep it in your purse for tonight in case you need to touch up?”

“About that,” Cady says, “I don’t think my purse really goes with this.” She gestures to herself, and then her bag, which is resting on Regina’s bed. Cady’s one hundred percent right. It’s not ugly , by any means, but it’s a big, bulky purse that has no business being paired with this outfit. Or any outfit, really. It’s definitely more practical than it is a fashion statement. 

Regina stands up from the ottoman, instantly missing the proximity to Cady. “Let me see what I have,” she says. “You only really need a little clutch for dinner, honestly. You can leave your bag in my car and just take the clutch in.” 

Regina’s rambling again, and she knows it. She can’t stop the words from flowing as she pokes around the handbag section of her closet. She finds a small black bag, just big enough to hold the essentials. Exactly what she was looking for. 

She returns to Cady, who’s stood up from the vanity. Regina hands her the clutch. “That should be big enough for your phone, wallet, keys, and lipstick.” 

“ Fine ,” Cady huffs, but she’s smiling. “I’ll take the lipstick. But only for tonight.” 

Regina smiles back. “I suppose that’ll do.”

The pair still have their hair to do, and Regina offers to do Cady’s. It’s not much, just brushing it out and curling it slightly at the bottoms, but Regina can feel her heartbeat in her ears the entire time. Cady’s hair is so soft , and she can’t help herself from running her fingers through it a few times. She can feel the way Cady relaxes at the touch, which makes Regina’s heart pound faster. 

She has got to get a grip, she tells herself. If she can’t calm down, she’s going to end up doing something stupid and breaking the entire letting Cady set the pace rule she’s set for herself. 

She’s extremely proud of the job she does with Cady’s hair. Her whole look, really, has come together in a way that reminded Regina just how good she was at this. She started with little more than an idea and a couple pieces of clothes, and it evolved into her friend looking drop dead gorgeous . 

Regina is convinced that if the circumstances were different, she could take Cady out to a bar tonight, any bar, and guarantee Cady ended the night getting laid. 

She shuts that thought down as quickly as she can, trying to refocus. She still has her own hair to do, but she doesn’t start until she compliments Cady at least three times. 

Regina doesn’t spend too long on her own hair; it is still mostly done from work earlier. She touches a few small things up, but she’s done pretty quickly. 

“Wow,” Cady says quietly, taking in Regina George , all done up. The way she looks at Regina makes Regina’s heart soar . “You look… wow .”

Regina smiles. “Thanks. You look wow , too,” she teases lightly. 

Cady sticks her tongue out at her, and Regina feels like she might combust on the spot. She takes a deep breath, trying very hard not to stare at Cady’s lips again, and extends out a hand.

“Come on,” Regina says as Cady takes her hand. “Let’s go get our friends.”

Chapter Text

Girls’ Night (as Karen insists on calling it), is some of the most fun Cady’s had in a long time. The restaurant they go to is some trendy place on the river with an absolutely gorgeous view of the city. The place is definitely expensive, and in Cady’s opinion, the portions are way too small for their price tags, but she doesn’t say anything. She’s pleasantly surprised to find out that this place even has mocktails , and a sly grin from Regina tells her this was a purposeful choice. For the first time ever , she enjoys a fun little drink with her friends, one that won’t disrupt her medications. 

To her surprise, Regina orders a mocktail too. “It’s a Friday night,” Regina says with a shrug. “I’m DD’ing.” 

“DD’ing?” Cady asks, tilting her head. 

“DD stands for Designated Driver,” Regina explains. “It’s when one friend in the group stays sober so they can drive everyone else home.”

“Never thought I’d see the day where you’d volunteer to DD,” Karen giggles. “Usually we have to enforce a rotation,” she tells Cady. “Regina never wants to do it.”

“Maybe I just didn’t feel like drinking tonight,” Regina shrugs. “Besides, we do need a DD for a Friday.”

“What’s so different about Fridays?” Cady asks. 

“Way more people are out drinking, so accidents are more likely,” Gretchen explains. “Plus, the cops will have more checkpoints, so even if we were all sober enough to drive, it’s better to be safe than sorry.” 

Karen gestures in Cady’s direction. “Wait. If you don’t drink, why don’t you just DD?”

“I don’t have my license,” Cady tells her. She tries to ignore the shocked looks on Gretchen and Karen’s faces. “Never needed it, so I never got it.” 

“Which is why I’m DD’ing.” Regina gives Gretchen and Karen a pointed look, and the pair immediately neutralize their expressions. The waitress returns with their drinks, wearing that same nervous expression their waiter from the other night wore when she looks at Karen. 

Cady still can’t really wrap her mind around the idea that her three friends each have at least a million followers on Instagram (In Regina’s case, she has triple the amount of followers as her friends, which isn't exactly surprising). The idea of her friends being influencers or whatever, no, that’s not shocking in itself. They have, in a way, been influencers for as long as Cady has known them, just to a much smaller degree. But the sheer numbers , the scale of it all, that's what shocks her. Cady can’t really visualize a million of anything, let alone people . 

After Karen has taken her pictures of the drinks, she has them all raise them up, and cheers, “To Girls’ Night!” as she takes a video of them tapping their drinks together. Cady’s pleasantly surprised that her mocktail tastes so good. Regina insists that Cady try hers as well, and it’s just as good as the one Cady ordered. 

(The strawberry flavor of Regina’s drink reminds Cady of Regina’s face inches from hers as Regina does Cady’s makeup, the scent of her perfume and color of her cheeks. It makes Cady’s stomach do a flip, but for once, in a way that fills her with hope instead of dread.) 

The rest of the dinner is similar to their first together, except Gretchen and Karen keep the drinks flowing. The food is good , but Cady still doesn’t think it’s worth the price. Karen’s getting drunker and drunker, giggling nonstop every time Gretchen looks at her. Gretchen keeps looking back with the sweetest eyes, and it’s so damn cute, it’s nauseating. 

Regina shoots Cady a look as if to say, See what I mean? Cady shoots her a look back that says, Leave them be , even if deep down, Cady is jealous of how easily those two love each other. It’s so seamless, so simple . They’re just in love. No complications, no tumultuous past, no one trying to stop them. 

Okay, well, Gretchen and Karen definitely have a past. Cady knows this. Those two have known each other since elementary school. They’ve lived through the best and worst eras of Regina George together. Perhaps that's why it’s so simple for them. They've already been through everything together. This just makes sense. 

Karen takes a million pictures of their dinner, but she also insists on getting pictures of the group, and selfies with everyone. Cady finds her laughter contagious, even if she’s stone cold sober. Karen compliments Cady no less than a dozen times as they take their selfies together. She does the same for Regina, and, of course, Gretchen, the latter being peppered with “I love you”s at the end of each compliment. 

Karen has always been a very lovey drunk, Cady knows this. Her high school friendship with the Plastics may not have lasted super long, but she remembers being at parties with them a couple of times and watching as Karen would compliment any person within 5 feet of her. More often than not, that person had been Gretchen. 

Even back then, it had been clear that Gretchen was the most important person in Karen’s life. One was hardly ever seen without the other nearby. They looked out for each other, in their own ways. Cady remembers seeing Karen going to comfort Gretchen a handful of times after Regina had snapped at her. Gretchen was always keeping tabs on Karen at parties, making sure that even if she was having fun, no one was taking advantage of her. 

Cady remembers being jealous of their friendship once. Wanting someone who was so clearly ready to ride or die for her. Wanting someone who cared for her the way they cared for each other. Wanting to have someone that everyone just associated with her. 

She realizes now, over a decade later, that what she really wanted was love . Sure, Gretchen and Karen were several years away from actually dating, but those girls had been in love long before Cady met them. They loved unlike anyone else Cady had ever met, and she hoped that one day, she would be able to have something like that too. 

After dinner, Gretchen suggests they get some air and walk down the Riverwalk a bit. Karen seems overjoyed at the suggestion, and, well, no one can say no to Karen, so Regina and Cady agree. 

Karen and Gretchen walk ahead, holding hands, smiling, and giggling to one another. Regina and Cady are a good ten feet behind them, keeping a slow and steady pace. They don’t say much, Cady just taking in the gorgeous views of the city and enjoying the company. Cady doesn’t make any moves to take Regina’s hand. She wants to, she really wants to, but something about her feels unsure. Like somehow, someway, this’ll go wrong. It sucks , because the only thing she wants to do right now is hold Regina’s hand, but she can’t bring herself to do it. 

The wind picks up a bit, and Cady finds herself folding her arms across her chest, shivering a bit. She wishes she’d asked to borrow a jacket, too, but neither her nor Regina had expected to be out walking after dinner. 

Regina steps a bit closer as they walk, wrapping an arm around the back of Cady’s shoulders. “This okay?” she asks quietly, rubbing Cady’s right shoulder with her hand. 

Cady smiles at the touch, the question, the warmth . Regina’s arm shouldn’t feel as warm as it does. It’s a bare arm, yet it feels like it warms Cady’s soul . 

“Yeah,” she says, “it’s perfect.”

At one point during their walk, Karen and Gretchen insist on stopping to get some cute pictures. It's a gorgeous spot along the Riverwalk, and while the two of them take a series of selfies and other pictures, Regina and Cady lean up against a railing, looking out over the city. Regina still has one arm wrapped around Cady, leaning on the railing with her other arm. 

“Sorry I didn't think about a jacket,” Regina says as they stare out at the city. “I didn't think we’d be out walking.” 

“I didn't realize it was going to be this chilly,” Cady responds. “So we both missed the mark on that one.” 

“I'll make sure we're better prepared next time.”

“Next time?” Cady asks with a little smirk. 

“Please, you heard Karen. She's so into the idea of a regular Girls’ Night. I wouldn't be shocked if she's got the next four planned already.” 

Cady laughs. “You're so right. I’m in. I love spending time with you guys.” 

Regina smiles. “I'm so glad. I'm happy you're with us again.” 

“Me too. This night has been the most fun I've had in a really long time.”

Regina squeezes Cady's shoulders. “There's plenty more where that came from.”

Cady leans her head against Regina’s shoulder, looking back out at the city. “The mocktails were really fun. I don't think I've ever had one.” 

“A lot more places are doing them now,” Regina tells her. “Sobriety is less taboo than it used to be. I, um, kind of told Karen to try to pick places that had them.” 

Cady laughs lightly. “I knew it!” 

Regina squeezes Cady’s shoulders lightly. “I didn't want you to be left out.” 

“You're always looking out for me. It's so cu- sweet ,” Cady corrects herself. She needs to tread lightly . Be careful . She knows this. 

Regina doesn't acknowledge the slip. “Yeah, well, you know. I care about you. A lot.” 

Cady looks up at her, and her heart skips a beat. Regina has the softest look on her face, the gentlest smile. Cady wants nothing more than to tilt her head up and ki-.

“Hey guys!” Gretchen calls from about twenty feet away. “You ready to head back? Karen’s getting wobbly in her heels.” 

Regina closes her eyes and lets out a low sigh. “Yeah, we’re coming! Don't wait up!” Regina calls back, and the other two start heading back towards the valet their car was parked with. 

“We should follow them,” Cady says, almost robotically. Her face feels warm, hot even, and she hopes Regina thinks it's because of the wind. 

“Yeah,” Regina replies. She adjusts her grip on Cady’s shoulders, and starts leading her back towards the car. The walk is silent, but not empty, the unresolved energy lingering between them. 

Cady texts her mom when they’re close to the car, letting her know she’ll be home soon. She hasn’t stopped smiling since they started walking back, despite the slightly awkward air. The feeling of Regina’s arm around her shoulders, guiding her, makes her feel warm and safe in a way she’s not really used to. It’s not until they get back to the car that Regina finally lets go, and even so, she seems reluctant. 

Regina drops Cady off first, since the other three all live in the same apartment building. Cady wishes them all a good night, Gretchen and Karen drunkenly professing how much they love Cady from the backseat. Cady laughs, says she loves them too, and waves goodnight to Regina. Regina doesn’t drive away until after Cady’s inside the lobby, which she definitely notices. It makes her heart feel warm as she heads up the elevator, and tries very hard to not focus too much on what that means. 

Her joy is short lived, however, when she enters her apartment to find her mother glaring at her from the couch.

“Have you lost your mind?” Dr. Heron asks, standing up, arms crossed. “Are you still taking your meds?”

“What?” Cady replies, stunned. “ What ? Of course I am!” 

“What on Earth were you thinking then?” Dr. Heron looks her up and down. “And what the hell are you wearing?” 

Cady takes a step back. “Okay, first of all, no idea what you’re talking about. Secondly, it’s Regina’s. We went out to a fancier restaurant, so she lent me some clothes.” 

“Oh, I know about the restaurant.” 

“Mom, what are you talking about?”

“I’m talking about this !” Dr. Heron holds up her phone. The screen is showing a post on Instagram from Karen, from earlier tonight. It’s the video of them cheersing their drinks, no audio, posted with an array of other photos from Girls’ Night. “ Drinking ? Seriously ? You know you can’t do that with your medications!” 

“Mom, I had a mocktail . No alcohol .” She makes a disgusted face. “Are you kidding me? Do you think I’m stupid? I know better than to mess with my meds!” 

“I don’t know what to think anymore!” Dr. Heron throws her hands up in the air.

Cady’s jaw drops. Never, in a million years, would she ever expect her mother to reply like that to the question of, Do you think I'm stupid? It stings, Cady hurting in a way she never expected. Her mom has always been her biggest supporter. At least, until recently. 

“Are you serious right now?” Cady asks, furious. “Have you been drinking? Why would I lie about that? Why would I take that risk ? You can look up the damn restaurant yourself and look at the menu. It was a mocktail .” 

Dr. Heron just looks at her daughter. “I wish you would stop seeing her. You haven’t been yourself since Regina waltzed back into your life.”

Cady stares back. “Are you kidding me? You accuse me of drinking the moment I walk through the door, you insinuate you think I’m stupid-.”

“I did no such thing.”

“You absolutely did!” Cady is shaking with anger now. “And then you tell me for the thousandth time that you don’t like Regina, despite me telling you I’m done having this conversation several times-.”

“You may be done, but I’m not .”

“Neither am I! Since you won’t let me finish without cutting me off!” Cady snaps. “And don’t get me started on… I haven’t been myself ? I haven’t been myself in ten and a half years . These last couple of weeks have been the happiest I’ve been in a long time , no thanks to you!” She gestures wildly. “I just had a great night. I had a great meal with my friends and we walked on the Riverwalk for a bit and looked at the gorgeous city. I had a great time. I was happy until the second I walked through this door, because you have decided Regina’s the spawn of Satan or something, and she’s tricking me into fucking up my meds or something!”

“She could be,” Dr. Heron starts, but she’s cut off by her daughter. 

“Oh my God , Mom. Do you hear yourself? Seriously! You sound actually insane . I heard less insane things in the hospital! She is my friend . Did she make mistakes in the past? Yes! Have I moved past those? Also yes! You don’t have to forgive her, but you have got to stop acting like the world’s going to end every time I hang out with her!” 

“I just don’t get it,” Dr. Heron says. “I don’t understand how you could just move on . She ruined your life , Cady. She’s the entire reason you were even in the programs at the hospital!” 

Cady glares at her mother. “That’s not true, and you know it.” 

“You would have been fine after Aaron if she hadn’t done what she did.”

“You don’t know that!” Cady exclaims. “You have no idea what would have happened.” 

“Yes I do! You were getting better . You would have been fine!” 

“Mom, the chances of this happening to me at some point were high . You know that. I know that. Did it end up being Regina that was the catalyst? Yes. Does that mean it wouldn’t have happened at some point without her? No!” 

“You never would have gotten sick if it weren’t for her.” 

“That’s literally not true !” Cady’s whole body is vibrating with anger. “You don’t have half of Dad’s brain. His broken, broken brain. I do.” 

Dr. Heron’s eyes darken. “Do not bring your father into this.” 

Cady balls her hands up into fists. “He’s already here . He’s here in every conversation about this. He’s here in every conversation about my depression. He’s there in every pill, every therapy session, everything . He was sick for so long , Mom. And I have the same exact thing that he does!” 

“No, you don’t,” Dr. Heron insists. “He got sick. You had something terrible happen to you.” 

“I wasn’t in an accident , Mom. I have clinical depression . Which is the exact same thing that Dad had. Which you never acknowledge. It's an illness . You’re a biologist, for crying out loud! You know how this stuff works ! You know I was always at risk for this. Just because there was a specific catalyst doesn’t mean my depression is any different from Dad’s.”

“Don’t say that,” Dr. Heron warns. Her voice is less angry, and more… scared. Cady realized right away what inference her mother drew from that comment.

“I don’t… Mom, I’m not saying that I’m going to kill myself,” Cady sighs. “I’m saying that I could have gotten sick with or without everything that happened in high school. I’m saying I probably would have regardless. I’m trying to move on with my life so I can learn to be happy again.”

“You’ve been happy,” Dr. Heron says quietly. “You’ve been happy for a couple of years.” 

Cady gives her mother a sad look. “I’ve been stable , Mom. That doesn’t mean I’ve been happy . There’s a big difference.” 

“What about this situation makes you happy ?” Dr. Heron asks, desperation in her eyes. 

Cady swallows. In a split second, the words leave her mouth, and she can’t stop them, like word vomit. “I like her. I like Regina. Like, I have feelings for her.” 

Dr. Heron stares blankly at her daughter. Cady just keeps going, fully unable to stop herself. 

“I’ve liked her since the first day of high school. I didn’t know it then. I didn’t understand that I felt that way about girls too. And when she showed up at work, I just… I was so scared, but I was also so excited . And she kept coming back and everything happened and I didn’t know what I was feeling or why but suddenly I find myself smiling every time she looks at me and my heart skips a beat any time she touches my arm or holds my hand.” Cady takes a sharp breath, running out of air from rambling. “And I know you don’t trust her, but I do . She’s done nothing but prove over and over and over again that she’s changed . That she cares . That she genuinely wants something good between us, and honestly, so do I!” 

“Cady…” Dr. Heron’s voice is so soft, it’s a near whisper. “Cady, honey, what are you doing ?” 

There are tears in Cady’s eyes now. “She likes me too, you know. She liked me back then, too. It’s why she did what she did. Which is fucked up, and she knows that. I know that. She’s apologized and proven herself trustworthy. She’s not pushed me into anything I don’t want. I’m taking it slow . She doesn’t even know I have feelings for her right now. Hell, I didn’t even really acknowledge it until just now! She’s happy just being friends, if that’s what I want, and I trust her . So, yeah. That’s why I’m happy. Because I like someone, and they like me back, and I know we have a complicated past, but I’m not still living there. I’m here, right now, and today was incredibly fun and I was so goddamn happy until I walked through that door.” She points at the front door behind her. “And instead of being happy that your daughter is experiencing joy for the first time in ten years, you’ve made me feel like shit .” The tears start falling, and Cady just gestures to her face. “See!” 

“Cady, I-.”

“No,” Cady says, shaking her head, wiping her tears. “I’m done having this conversation. And I mean it . I’m not engaging with you anymore when you tell me I’m making a mistake or this is a bad idea or whatever . I am so goddamn tired of saying the same stuff over and over and over again. You don’t listen . You don’t care about what I have to say about it. You don’t trust me to make my own decisions. You don’t think I’m capable. Newsflash, Mom. I’m fucking capable . These last few weeks have been a rollercoaster, but not because of her . Because of you, and Thalia, and Damian, and Janis. I’m done .” She steps to the side, around her mother. “I’m going to bed , and then tomorrow, I’m going to work , and then, I’m going to go see Regina again. And I’m going to have fun and be happy . And I’m not going to stand here for a single second longer and listen to this.” 

With that, she slams her bedroom door shut, flicking the lock. She leans her back against the door, slowly sliding down to the ground as she begins to sob. She wraps her knees up to her chest, tears running down her face. She hates this. She hates everything about this. Why won’t anyone just listen to her? Why will no one believe her? Why can’t she just be happy ? 

Cady yanks the handbag out of her larger bag, which hadn’t left her shoulder until she got into the bedroom. She opens it and sees the goddamn tube of lipstick. The sight makes her even angrier, but not at Regina. No, she's still angry with her mother. The silly back and forth over the lipstick was supposed to be the biggest “drama” of the night. Now Cady’s crying on her bedroom floor, and it’s so goddamn infuriating . 

She pulls out her phone, opening up the group chat Gretchen had made earlier in the night with the four of them, currently titled Girls’ Night!!!!🤪💃🎉

Cady - 9:56pm

Please block my mother on Instagram and any other social media you can find her on. I believe her username is @DoctorHeron. At least I think it is.

Regina - 9:56pm

What happened? Is everything okay? 

Cady - 9:56pm

We got into a big fight. I don’t really want to go into it. Please just block her. I don’t want her doing this again.

Regina - 9:57pm

Done.

A different notification pops up, in her direct texts with Regina. 

Regina - 9:57pm

Are you okay??

Cady - 9:57pm

Not really.

Cady - 9:57pm

And I’m so tired of talking about it.

Cady - 9:57pm

It’s the same shit as always.

Regina - 9:57pm

I’m so sorry.

Regina - 9:57pm

Is there anything I can do?

Cady hesitates for a moment, and then presses the call button at the top of the screen. Regina picks up on the first ring. 

“Hello?”

“Hi,” Cady replies softly, her voice weak. “I’m sorry, I just… I don’t know.”

“It’s okay,” Regina says. “It’s okay.” 

“Can I, um, can I come to your place after work tomorrow?” Cady asks. “I need to just… be away for a bit. I think.” 

“Of course,” Regina’s voice is soft, calming. “Whatever you need. And if you want to talk about it then, I’m all ears. If not, that’s okay. We can just watch a movie or something.”

“No jumpscares,” Cady says quietly.

Regina laughs, and the sound relaxes Cady instantly. “No jumpscares, I promise.” 

“Thank you.” Cady sits on the floor for a few more moments, staring straight ahead. “Will you stay on the phone with me?”

“Of course.”

“I need to put it down for a minute so I can get changed and stuff.”

“I’ll be right here,” Regina says, and Cady fully trusts her. She shuffles around her room for a minute, fully on autopilot. She carries her phone with her to the bathroom, which she mutes the moment she leaves her bedroom. She goes as quickly as possible, not wanting to run into her mother again. Her mother’s bedroom door is closed, which tells Cady she’s probably gone to bed too. Cady slips back into her own bedroom, locking the door behind her again and flicking off the light. 

When Cady collapses into her bed in her dark room, she unmutes her phone. “Hi,” she says quietly.

“Hi,” Regina replies. “You ready for bed?”

“Yeah. Thank you, by the way.”

“For what?”

“Everything. I don’t know. I had a lot of fun tonight. You let me borrow your clothes. You’re sitting on the phone with me.” 

“You don’t have to thank me,” Regina says. “I’m more than happy to do all those things.” 

“I know,” Cady replies. “I just… don’t wanna be a burden, I guess.”

“You are not a burden.” Regina’s voice is stern, sterner than she’s heard since reconnecting with her. “At all. Ever. Okay?”

“Okay.”

“Say it back to me.”

“I’m not a burden.”

“Good,” Regina says. “Good.” 

Cady sighs. “I need to sleep but my brain won’t stop buzzing. I have work tomorrow.” 

“Same early shift?” Regina asks.

“Same as always,” Cady sighs again. “I just want my brain to shut up.”

“What helps calm you down?”

“It depends. Sometimes I take a sleeping pill, but it’s too late for that if I want to make it to work tomorrow. I’ll be knocked out till noon if I take that now. Sometimes I listen to music or something, but I don’t think that’s gonna do it tonight. It was… it was a lot.” 

“I’m so sorry,” Regina says. “Especially after how much fun we had tonight too.”

“I know.” Cady is quiet for a moment, and then says, “There’s one more thing that’s been calming me down lately.”

“What’s that?”

“Your voice.” The words feel so thick, leaving Cady’s mouth. She doesn’t want to take this too fast or too far, but she needs this. 

“Well, I’m right here.” Regina’s voice is soft and sweet, and Cady feels warmth filling her chest. “I was gonna read a little bit of my book before bed. I could read it out loud, if you want?”

“Yes please,” Cady says instantly, her voice soft and weak. 

“One second,” Regina tells her, and there’s some shuffling in her background. A few moments later, she’s back. “Okay. Do you want context for where I’m at in the story, or no?”

“I don’t think I’m going to be paying close attention,” Cady admits. “I just want to listen to your voice.”

“Okay,” Regina replies. “I’ll just start from where I left off then.”

Cady gets cozy under the blankets, putting the phone on speaker on her pillow. She listens as Regina reads the book to her, not really paying attention to the words, as expected. Her voice is soft and sweet, and it doesn’t take long for Cady to start to doze off.

Regina stops reading when she hears Cady’s soft snoring over the phone. She’s quiet for a few moments, listening to the noise, making sure Cady’s finally asleep. 

Just before hanging up the phone, as soft as she can, she whispers, “I love you.”  

Chapter Text

Dr. Betsy Heron is many things. She’s a researcher, a doctor, a biologist, a professor, but above all, in her mind, she is a mother. 

She’s very proud of her academic accomplishments, don’t get her wrong. She worked very hard over very many years to finally finish her PhD. And her published research? It’s one of her biggest joys in life. 

As proud as she is of her title, of her degrees, it doesn’t hold a candle to how proud she is of her daughter. It’s never been easy for the two of them. Life… Life handed Betsy a pretty empty deck, and left her to fill in the missing pieces. 

There was a time in which Betsy relied so heavily on her family for support. Early on in her adulthood, it was financial support, her father putting her through college and her first round of graduate school, in which she got a Master’s Degree. He was a successful surgeon, and while he always hoped she would want to be one too, she found her love of science in research, not medicine. Even more specifically, she loved animals , of all shapes and sizes. 

Her mother had been a schoolteacher, and instilled a love of learning and curiosity in her from a very young age. Betsy attributed most of her love for science and academia to her parents, and the way that she was raised.

She always knew she wanted to have a family of her own, but her primary focus was on her academics. That was, of course, until she met Chip Heron. They attended the same Master’s program, both in love with biology, zoology, and research. It didn’t take long for them to add each other to that list. 

Chip Heron had been an interesting man. He was tall and lanky, with tiny glasses on his face, but he was always filled with grand ideas. He wanted to travel the world with Betsy, go to exotic places and study the animals that lived there. They talked of the jungles of Southeast Asia, the savannas of Africa, even the frozen wasteland known as Antarctica. Chip had a special love for penguins, visiting them regularly at their local aquarium. 

They made a plan together. They would get married, and then they would apply to international PhD programs that would allow them to travel and study while working on their doctorates. Then, one day, they’d settle down, whether it be in America or elsewhere, and have a family. Two kids, that was always the plan, so the first one would have a friend, no matter where they were in the world. They were both only children themselves, and wanted something for their hypothetical children that they had simply never had.

Everything changed when Betsy’s mother died suddenly from a stroke, just a few short months before the wedding. 

The grief was surmounting to Betsy. She loved her mother, her closest friend, her biggest supporter, the person she could always turn to for advice. They had been so close, they’d spoken the night before she died, despite living on different sides of the country. Betsy was inconsolable for weeks, as Chip did his very best to take care of her. To make sure that she was, or eventually would be, okay . 

In a matter of only two months, Betsy’s father’s health began to fail too. It was a month before their wedding, and it was unclear if he was going to make it that long. He was heartbroken at the loss of his wife, who he had been with for over sixty years.

Betsy and Chip moved their wedding up, getting married in the family home, surrounded by only a few close friends and her father in a home hospital bed. They had no family left now except for him, given that both of Chip’s parents had passed away before he even met Betsy. No cousins, no siblings, no aunts or uncles. 

Betsy’s father passed away exactly eleven weeks after his wife did, to the day. 

His death was hard, but also, somehow easier on Betsy. It brought her comfort to know that her parents were together again, that they had spent such little time apart. The Herons delayed their application processes to mourn and recover, continuing to work in a research lab in Florida, near the Everglades. They would get back on track again soon, once Betsy was fully okay again. 

It was only a few months after the wedding that Betsy found out she was pregnant. At first, she panicked. Yes, they wanted children, but this was early, far too early in their life plan. They hadn’t gotten their PhDs yet. They were supposed to raise their children globally, not in a little house near the Everglades. 

When Betsy told Chip, he had been over the moon with joy. He was so, so excited to have a child. Betsy did her best to put aside her feelings about her career, never having seen her husband so happy in his life. He promised that they would do their PhDs together one day, and he was content on continuing to work in the lab until their child was a little bit older. This put Betsy more at ease, with the firm belief that one day, her and her husband and their two children would travel the world. They would get those doctorates one day. 

Pregnancy was hard on Betsy. She missed her mother, every single day. She wished she was there, able to answer Betsy’s questions and help her through the worst of it. Chip did his best, absolutely, but he was no replacement for her own mother.

When they found out they were having a baby girl, Betsy was the happiest she’d ever been. As badly as she missed her own mother, she would get to build that relationship with her own baby girl. She obsessed over nursery painting, name picking, and every other aspect of parenthood that she needed to prepare for. 

The couple decided on the name Cady for their baby girl, unique, yet, meant something to them both. The name Cady meant a pure, or idyllic place, which is the type of future they envisioned for her: living together, their family, in an idyllic place, surrounded by nature. 

Cady was born, and Betsy had never been happier. She absolutely adored her daughter, and the absolute joy she brought to her life. As her daughter grew from an infant to a toddler, she was immensely proud at every milestone, every moment, every adorable little thing she did. 

While Betsy was obsessed with her daughter, however, she failed to see what was happening to her husband.

Chip wasn’t himself anymore. He loved his daughter and his wife very much, but he struggled to be around them. He spent large spans of time holed up at work, or tucked away in his home office, while his wife was left to take care of the baby on her own, sometimes for days at a time. In a way, Betsy noticed, absolutely, but her concern was not with why he was doing this, rather, that he was doing this at all. 

She was angry with him, often, which seemed to drive him away more. She began to speculate on why , eventually even accusing him of cheating. She couldn’t understand how things had fallen apart so quickly, how he had gone from being so excited about the idea of raising a family to never wanting to be around them. 

One day, when Cady was two, Chip sat Betsy down and told her the truth. He wasn’t okay. He hadn’t been okay since shortly before Cady was born. He wasn’t sure why. He really didn’t understand what happened. He had been so excited to become a dad, and he loved Cady and Betsy more than anything in the world.

But he wasn’t happy. He hadn’t felt happiness in over two years. Not when Cady took her first steps. Not when she said her first word (“Mama!”). Not when little Cady imitated animal noises and danced around the living room with Betsy. Not when he was at home. Not when he was at work. Never. He was just never happy anymore.

He was scared, he told his wife. Scared that he was never going to be able to bounce back from this. Scared that he was never going to be able to be the dad that Cady needed, the husband that Betsy needed. He was scared of what he’d become, and if he would ever make it out of this. 

Betsy listened, with rapt attention, worried for her husband. He was right. He hadn’t been himself in years. She had no idea he’d felt this way, and felt tremendously guilty for thinking the worst of him. Betsy convinced him to go see his doctor, who gave him a referral for a specialist who was supposed to be able to help with these sorts of things.

It took nearly a year of regular visits with a psychologist, but Chip started to spend more time with his family again. He’d play with Cady, smiling and laughing with her as she made animal noises and stomped around the living room. He’d make arrangements for a babysitter so he and his wife could go out on dates. He spent his free time at home with them, not locked away in his office or at work. 

Betsy was hopeful . He was getting better. He was feeling happy. They were happy. All three of them, their little family. Even their research in the Everglades was going well. They were hoping to publish soon! Maybe they could get back on track again, start applying for PhD programs. Little Cady would be in Kindergarten in less than two years, and Betsy wanted her to start out in one place, not move suddenly early on in elementary school. Maybe they’d even be able to get one of those international positions they’d always wanted, and homeschool their little girl. 

It all came crashing to a halt when Betsy picked up Cady from daycare one day, to find a note taped to the front door of the house.

Don’t let Cady in the office. I’m sorry.

That was it. Those were the last words she ever received from her husband. Her worst nightmare had come true. 

He hadn’t gotten better. No, not one bit. He had gotten worse. He was just better at hiding it. 

Betsy had moved like a robot through the weeks that followed. She took Cady to daycare every day, dodging her little girl’s questions about where her father had gone. She came back home, made funeral arrangements, cried, wept, grieved. She got herself together, went to pick Cady up from daycare, and acted like everything was normal in the evenings. They ate dinner together, played games, and read a bedtime story each night. 

It wasn’t until just before the funeral that Betsy explained to her daughter that daddy wasn’t coming home. Something had happened. He had died, and that meant he wasn’t here anymore.

It took Cady a long time to wrap her head around the idea. She’d often ask when her dad was coming home, even after the funeral, and Betsy would always do her best to explain. It wasn’t easy, no, and it took her several more years to truly understand that her father was gone. Each and every time Cady questioned it, it broke Betsy's heart. 

Shortly after the funeral, Betsy threw herself into applications. She couldn’t stay here, in the Everglades, surrounded by reminders of him, of her failures to see just how badly he was hurting. She couldn’t face her work, where his desk sat empty across the room. She couldn’t face that office , where she, and she alone, had found him. 

The applications weren’t for PhD programs, like she had once planned. No, that seemed impossible now. It was her dream, yes, but one that was supposed to happen with Chip at her side. They were supposed to become doctors together. Besides, she now had to raise Cady alone. There was no way to do that while getting her PhD and living abroad. Instead, she applied to research programs that would let her go internationally with just a Master’s and her research experience. 

She landed a position with a zoology program out in Kenya. It was one of the places she’d always wanted to go, to learn, to live . Africa . The vast wildlife, the open sky… It was exactly what she and her little girl needed. 

So less than two months after Chip’s death, Betsy either sold or packed up their belongings, and made the country across the globe with a toddler in tow. 

It wasn’t easy, raising Cady in Kenya. But Betsy did what she does best, and made it work. She found ways to make learning fun, make Cady’s life as happy as she could. It was the least she could do. She carried with the guilt of failing to see the signs for years, never really being able to move past the note she found taped to the door of their home. 

It helped that Kenya was so drastically different from America. Sure, she had to build up new friendships and navigate a culture that wasn’t her own, but she embraced it. This was preferable to staying in that haunted place, with people who knew. People who knew how badly Betsy had failed . People who knew the tragedy of Chip Heron. 

When asked by coworkers or friends Betsy had made in Kenya, she would tell the half truth. Chip had passed away when Cady was very young. Most people simply offered their condolences, and did not bring it up again. Eventually, people stopped asking entirely. She wasn’t sure if she’d just been here long enough that everyone knew, and any new coworkers or Peace Corps members got the rundown of all of the researchers when they arrived. 

Over the years, people came and went. Doctoral students, researchers, Peace Corps members, even a few particularly rich animal lovers. By the time Cady Heron was 13 years old, Betsy was the only one who had stayed for all ten years. 

Kenya was a very special place for Betsy. It offered her the fresh start she needed, the ability to raise her daughter and work in the field she loved. She missed Chip terribly, of course, every single day, but over the years, it got easier and easier to deal with. She no longer felt horribly sad while studying giraffes, which had been Chip’s favorite animal. Instead, she was filled with a sense of warm nostalgia, memories of a time long passed. 

It was a bittersweet reality that Cady didn’t really remember much about Chip. Betsy wanted her to know her father, of course, but it wasn’t that simple. The man Betsy remembered, the man she fell in love with, well, he had been gone before Cady was even born. The few memories Cady did have of Chip were of a man afflicted with an illness he would never recover from. He was never himself again. 

It made things easier, in a way. Betsy didn’t have to explain what happened to Chip for many years, and let Cady grow up in blissful ignorance. She told her daughter plenty of good stories about her father, of course. Tales of their time together in graduate school, and their many trips to the zoo. She told her daughter of late nights under the stars, long days in the lab, and the pure love the two had for each other. 

If Cady did ask about what happened to her father, the answer was always simple. “He got sick.” Betsy wouldn’t elaborate more than that. Cady spent a few years trying to get more information, but eventually, she just… stopped trying. 

That was the case, until Cady was 13 years old, and tragedy struck their social circle.

There was a Peace Corps member who had to leave the Corps early. His brother, back stateside, had taken his own life after the death of his wife, leaving his children behind. The Peace Corps member had flown back to take care of his family, as the only adult left who could care for his niece and nephew. 

Word spread like wildfire around the village and the research site. Locals and researchers alike did what they could to send him letters, cards, and love, back on the other side of the world. Cady, who wore her emotions on her sleeve, had a very difficult time understanding why a person would do such a thing. Why someone would take their own life, especially if they had a family. Children . It was selfish, she had announced to her mother one night in their tent, and Betsy knew she had to tell her the truth.

It was a long and hard conversation. Betsy knew this day would come one day, but a part of her had hoped it never would. She did her very best to help Cady understand that people didn’t just do these things just because. Both her father and that man’s brother had been very sick. Their brains didn’t work correctly, and it made them feel like life wasn’t worth living. Her father’s illness was the reason he wasn’t here anymore, not because he was selfish or a bad father. He loved Cady, more than anything in the world. He just wasn’t able to overcome the illness that had taken him away. 

The conversation had changed Cady, in a way. Betsy couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but she noticed that her daughter walked through life a little differently now. More aware, maybe even too aware, perhaps. She felt that maybe she was too young to know, but that thought was shut down quickly. If Cady was old enough to consider it selfish, she was old enough to know the truth so she didn’t harbor that belief for long enough for it to ruin any memory of her father. 

It was nearly three years later, shortly after Cady turned 16, Betsy actually received an email from someone at Northwestern University’s biology department. They were looking for professors and researchers who had spent time abroad to come back and teach about biology and zoology and do some research. It was unusual for a university to reach out to Betsy, a woman who did not have a PhD, but her nearly thirteen years of experience in the field and plethora of published work from the field apparently made her a desirable candidate. 

Betsy had told Cady about this, in more of a passive way. Betsy had no intentions on returning to the United States. Kenya was so much lighter, freer, happier . She wasn’t constantly reminded of her failures here. She wasn’t constantly reminded of Chip, at least, not anymore.

Cady’s reaction, however, had surprised Betsy. She seemed heartbroken that they wouldn’t be going back to the states. Cady had told her that she loved Kenya, but she felt isolated here. She had no peers, no one her own age. The other children were either too old or too young, and she was lonely. She wanted friends, and to go to a real American high school, like the ones she saw in the handful of movies they had for their portable DVD player. 

Cady didn’t want to live with what ifs, might haves. She wanted the experiences of a normal teenager. 

Cady wanted to go back to America. 

They had gotten into an argument about it, one of their first arguments about something serious. It left Betsy with a lot of questions and much to think about. 

Had she really done a detriment to her daughter by keeping her out here, on the savanna? Was her social and emotional development really that behind? She tried to think long and hard about any friends that Cady had made in Kenya, and well, they were few and far between. For the most part, it had just been the two of them, relying on each other for far more than a typical mother and daughter should.

But she never really questioned it until now. Betsy adored her daughter, and their relationship. It had filled the void left by her own mother, but clearly, it wasn’t enough. 

It was a new form of guilt for Betsy, who realized now that her own inability to face her failures and her past had left Cady in a difficult situation. She called the people at Northwestern back, and she took the job. 

Betsy and Cady were going back to America.

Evanston, Illinois was very different from both Kenya and the Everglades. It had been a very long time since Betsy Heron had lived in suburbia. There was a whole routine she had to find her way back into, a whole social hierarchy she needed to find. Neighbors, friends, coworkers, all of it. She’d grown so accustomed to being the longest standing person, she struggled in her new roles, both as a professor at Northwestern and as a citizen in Evanston. 

The first few months were, generally speaking, very peaceful. Cady made friends at school, much to Betsy’s relief. There was Janis and Damian, two funny and kind teenagers who were incredibly creative and sweet to her daughter. They came around often, and Cady spent plenty of time with them, especially in the first month. Betsy was so relieved that her daughter had settled into a social circle, so she could focus more on settling into her own new dynamics. 

But once again, Betsy failed to see what was happening around her. She failed to notice the way Cady had begun to change, and some of the other friends that she had begun hanging around. It wasn’t until several weeks after Cady had befriended a group of three girls that Betsy even learned their names.

Karen Shetty, Gretchen Wieners, and Regina George . 

Betsy only met the three of them once, but she got an unsettling feeling from all three of them. They were clearly very rich, and definitely out of touch. They spoke and acted in ways that reminded Betsy of the popular girls at her own high school, who had bullied Betsy and the other nerds many years ago. She worried for her daughter, who insisted that they were all friends, but Betsy didn’t trust them. 

Cady explained that they were teaching her about high school and “girl world”, whatever that was supposed to mean. It worried her, but she decided she would let Cady continue to explore these friendships, and just be there to catch and support her if it went wrong.

She had no idea just how wrong it would go.

Aaron Samuels’s death was a true tragedy. It shook the whole community, but it shook Betsy to her core. 

Watching her daughter grieve this boy reminded her far too much of herself. Her mini-me wasn’t supposed to go through the same things she did, and certainly not this young. Sure, this was just a crush, not a marriage, but her daughter had always worn her heart on her sleeve. Cady always felt her emotions to their extremes, and this was no exception. 

Betsy did her best to support Cady in the immediate aftermath of Aaron’s death. She was relieved to find Damian and Janis constantly there, willing to help. The absent look in Cady’s eyes, the constant sobbing, the shell of a person she was now… it reminded Betsy far too much of Chip. Cady had always looked very similar to her mother, but now more than ever, Betsy could see the resemblance. 

It terrified Betsy. Cady couldn’t end up like her father. She couldn’t. Betsy Heron had buried far too many people in her life. She had buried both of her parents and her husband. She refused to bury her daughter.

Aaron’s funeral had changed things. Regina George had shifted from someone who Betsy vaguely distrusted around her daughter to public enemy number one. Some days, it felt silly to Betsy, having such an intense hatred for a 16 year old. But the more she saw her daughter deteriorate, turn into a carbon copy of her father, the larger that hatred grew. 

Betsy blamed herself for what happened to Chip. She blamed herself for not seeing the signs, for not getting him help sooner. She blamed herself for blaming him, for assuming the worst. She blamed herself for not being able to change things before it was too late. 

Betsy did not blame herself for what happened to Cady, nor did she blame Aaron. She blamed Regina George, and Regina George alone . Cady would have healed and been fine if not for Regina George. Sure, it would have taken time, but she would have gotten there .

Instead, she watched helplessly as her daughter slipped away from her, further and further into depression. She watched as her daughter was forced to drop out of high school. Her smart, incredibly intelligent daughter, who had been doing advanced math problems as early as 12 years old. Her beautiful, smart, kind, caring, gentle daughter was gone. Betsy recognized the person who remained, but not as her daughter. She saw a carbon copy of her husband in the years leading up to his death.

When Betsy found Regina George sitting outside their house, it had been the final straw. They couldn’t stay here, in this haunted town, just like they couldn’t stay in the Everglades. She thought about trying to go back to Kenya, but she knew that wasn’t feasible. Cady needed help, real, serious professional help, and she certainly couldn’t get that in the savanna. 

Betsy did what she does best: research. She learned about programs they could access in Chicago, but Cady would need to be a resident of Chicago to qualify for some of them. Some, the more mental health specific ones, could be accessed by any resident of Illinois, but others, like ones that focused on post-drop out services, she would need to live in Chicago to get into. Betsy applied for jobs at every single university in Chicago, with the knowledge that she could commute to Northwestern for work if she couldn’t find a job, but she wanted out of Evanston. She wanted away from this dark, haunted place. The place where she’d lost her daughter. 

With incredible luck, she found an open position at the University of Chicago. Within a week of Cady dropping out, their home had been sold, and they had moved into a small apartment just off campus. It wasn’t as big of a change as Kenya had been, but it was enough that Betsy was convinced that Cady would get the chance she needed to heal . 

Cady did start to heal, of course, but it took time, as everything does. The first few years were terrifying. Betsy never let Cady be alone. In the earliest years, she wasn’t even allowed to fully close the bathroom or bedroom doors. Despite the immense amount of people now working to help Cady, she never rose to the level of needing to be fully hospitalized, even though she had passive suicidal thoughts. 

When Cady had first admitted this during a family therapy session, Betsy cried for thirty straight minutes. She was convinced, convinced , that this was the beginning of the end. That Cady was going to go the same way her father had. The mental health professionals around them tried to explain that Cady wasn’t in danger, as she repeatedly stated over and over again that even though the thoughts were there, she didn’t actually want to die. She wanted to get better. She didn’t want to give up . 

But Betsy couldn’t believe that. How could she? She’d watched her husband “get better” in the months leading up to his death. Any progress was just as scary as no progress at all, because Betsy simply couldn’t trust that her daughter would actually be there if she ever left her alone. It took several years for Betsy to get to that point, and it wasn’t until Cady had left the partial hospitalization programs for the last time that she began to trust Cady to fully close doors. 

When her time with the hospitals were over, she began to access post-drop out services that had been put on hold while she was working on her mental health. Betsy had found an excellent program that had set Cady up with a case manager, a mentor, and a lot of connections around Chicago. The program even had some resources for parents, including a support group she began attending weekly for parents of teenagers with severe mental illness. 

For the first time since Chip’s death, she didn’t feel alone. 

Cady began to get better, and in a way, so did Betsy. She was finally able to watch her daughter get better and believe it, as the months turned to years. Cady got into a GED program, and at long last, completed her high school education at the age of 20. 

The day Cady got her GED certificate was the proudest day of Betsy Heron’s life. 

They still had a long way to go, but for the first time in years, Betsy began to feel like her daughter would be okay.

Shortly after Cady got her GED, Betsy finally began her PhD program. UChicago offered her a great deal, allowing her to do the program while still teaching under her other qualifications. She was certainly older than the other students in her program, but she didn’t feel bad about that anymore. 

She was finally doing it. She was finally accomplishing the dream she’d set out with her husband, all those years ago. 

After getting her GED, Cady’s program got her into some job training, and soon, she was matched with a coffee shop close to both the UChicago campus and the Heron apartment. It was perfect for her. It gave her structure, stability, and experiences that she desperately needed. 

Things were stable. It took an incredibly long time, but they were finally stable. 

Shortly before Cady’s 26th birthday, Betsy Heron defended her thesis, and finally received her PhD. Dr. Betsy Heron . Her dream had finally come true. 

For the first time since her parents had died, Betsy felt like her life had finally come together. Her and her daughter were stable and happy, and she was finally achieving her dreams. She began the new school year as a doctor , and she felt like things could only go up from there. 

Everything once again changed when, in May of that school year, she received a phone call from Cady’s number while she was at work. Cady never called her while she was at work, and Betsy immediately knew something had gone terribly wrong. Dread filled her, but she had no idea what horror she was about to answer the phone to.

Regina George was on the other line. 

Before she knew it, Regina George had waltzed back into her daughter’s life. Perhaps she had helped Cady that day in the coffee shop, sure , but the more Betsy learned about Regina George’s new involvement in Cady’s life, the angrier she got. 

This was the girl who had stolen her daughter from her, who had turned her daughter into a terrifyingly similar copy of her father. This was the girl that had completely derailed their lives. This was the girl who Betsy Heron had never stopped hating , despite all the time that had passed. 

Betsy tried to get Cady to stop. She tried, and tried, and tried, but Cady just wouldn’t listen . They argued in the weeks following the initial incident, frequently , and despite it all, Cady let Regina George back into her life. Their lives. Every time Cady said her name, Betsy felt her throat seize up and her heart skip a beat. Every time Cady spent time with her, Betsy couldn’t breathe, couldn’t move, couldn’t exist without immense fear and dread. She would wait until her daughter got back home, unmoving on the couch, staring at her shared location on her phone. 

Betsy couldn’t stop Cady, as badly as she wanted to. Cady was an adult now, she knew that. But Cady was still her little girl. She always would be that little girl who stomped around the living room in the Everglades, making animal noises and laughing and dancing with her. She’d always be the little girl running around the savanna, wide eyed as she watched and interacted with the animals. She’d always be the little girl who did advanced math problems for fun, who was always up for a challenge. She’d always be the little girl who begged her mom to let her have a “normal high school experience”.

She’d always be the little girl that Betsy watched waste away, helpless to stop it. She’d always be the little girl she was terrified she’d have to bury too, alongside everyone else. 

Cady would always be Betsy’s little girl.

When Betsy found out Cady was spending time with not only Regina George, but also Gretchen Wieners and Karen Shetty again, she began stalking all three of them on social media whenever Cady was with them. That’s how she found the video of the girls cheersing, and Betsy’s worst fears were confirmed. 

She’d spiraled on the couch, waiting for her daughter to come home, so she could confront her and finally put a stop to this madness. It had to end. This had to be over, before it was too late. 

Instead, they fought, again . 

Betsy watches as her daughter storms off into her bedroom, slamming the door and flicking the lock. Betsy’s heart sinks. Cady might have been allowed to close the door for years now, but they’d always had a rule about her locking the door. If the landlord had allowed it, Betsy would have taken the lock out as soon as they moved in, for her own peace of mind. Instead, it had gone untouched for ten years, until tonight. 

Cady locked her out. 

Betsy stands up from her spot on the couch, angrily walking towards Cady’s bedroom door. She stops outside of it, ready to knock and demand she unlock the door, when she hears Cady sobbing softly on the other side. 

Betsy’s heart shatters. She can’t do this. She can’t keep yelling at Cady. She can’t keep fighting her about this. Cady has been doing so well these last few years. Aside from big anniversaries, Cady hasn’t cried like this in a long time.

And now Cady was sobbing in her bedroom, because of her. 

The noise sobers Betsy up real quick. She drops her hand to her side, walking robotically into her own bedroom. She gently closes the door behind her, sliding her back down until she’s sitting on the ground, leaning against the back of the door. 

She sits there, as silent as possible, listening to her daughter cry. She listens to her stop, and then there’s silence for a few minutes. She almost gets up to check on her, but then she hears Cady talking softly on the phone. She can’t make out the words that are being said, but she can tell Cady is talking, and she knows exactly to who.

There’s not a doubt in Betsy’s mind that her daughter has called Regina George. 

She hears the lock click again, and the bedroom door open. She can hear the bathroom door close, and she lets out a breath she hadn’t realized she’d been holding. 

She sits there, listening to Cady go about her nighttime routine, like she had so many times in the early years of living in Chicago. It had taken her so long to stop doing this, to stop worrying that Cady was going to follow in her father’s footsteps at the first opportunity. Betsy hasn’t done this in years, yet, now, she feels like she absolutely must do this.

Cady eventually returns to her bedroom, and shuts the door. The lock clicks again, and Betsy can hear her start to talk softly again. Betsy drops her head between her knees, silently sobbing. 

She’d done this. She’d driven her daughter so far away from her that she’d locked her out. For the first time in her life, Cady wasn’t seeking her mother for comfort. She was looking to get away from her. 

Betsy stays on the floor all night, thinking about everything . She thinks about her own mother, their relationship, her father, Chip, Cady, Kenya, Evanston, Chicago, everything . She longs for people no longer here, and a life that is no longer hers. She longs for her daughter back, the happy girl who loves animals and math and never met Regina George. 

It’s not until Betsy hears Cady’s alarm and her bedroom door open that she realizes she’s been sitting there all night. She looks at the window to see the sunlight starting to peek in, dawn arriving. 

A new day , she tells herself, a new chance to make this right . 

Chapter Text

Cady wakes up the next morning to her alarm and a text from Regina.

Regina - 10:38pm

Goodnight, I’ll see you tomorrow. Let me know if you need anything. ❤️

She smiles at the text, just before the mixture of emotions at the memory of the previous night set in. She lugs herself out of bed, starting her morning routine. She wants to get out of the house as quickly as possible, even though the chances of her mother being awake at the crack of dawn were slim to none. 

Once she’s in the elevator, heading to work, she finally responds to Regina’s text.

Cady - 4:39am

Thank you for last night <3 It helped a lot.

Cady - 4:39am

And good morning, whenever you see this. <3

She hesitates to add the heart for a moment, but gives in as the elevator doors open. It’s a split second impulse, but she takes it. 

Everything about last night runs through her mind as she walks to work. Getting ready with Regina, Regina’s influence over the restaurant choice to make sure Cady could be included, walking with Regina, their little moment on the Riverwalk, falling asleep listening to Regina read over the phone…

God, she really is in deep, isn’t she? 

She does her best not to think about her mom on her way to work. Thinking too hard about that conversation is just going to send her spiraling, and she does not need that right before work. She lets her thoughts wander back to Regina instead, and the moment they shared on the Riverwalk. 

It’s clear to Cady that, yes, she does have feelings for Regina. (She’d even admitted it to her mother last night, but she’s trying not to think about that.) Just because she now understands her feelings doesn’t mean that they don’t scare her any less. She knows what she wants now, but that doesn’t mean the possibility of either actually getting that or things going terribly wrong isn’t terrifying . 

She tries to brush that away too, trying to stay focused on the happy thoughts and feelings. She’s definitely not well rested, and she needs all the positive energy she can get to make it through this shift. 

The walk is faster than normal, and she gets to work just as her manager does to open. They’re the only two scheduled for the first half hour, but over the course of the morning, a few more employees trickle in for their shifts.

Saturdays are slow compared to Cady’s other shifts. There’s definitely still a steady stream of folks, especially later in the morning, but the huge rush of office workers at around 8:30 and steady rushes before each of UChicago’s morning class time slots only happen on weekdays. Cady normally doesn’t mind the Saturday morning shifts, but today, she’s exhausted . She uses her once-per-shift meal pass to get herself a coffee and a muffin, which she nibbles on occasionally throughout the morning. The coffee helps, but she’s still wiped. 

A couple hours into her shift, one of Cady’s coworkers, Lola, arrives at work, a huge grin on her face.

“Cady freaking Heron,” Lola says as she enters the area behind the counter. “You’ve been holding out on us!” 

Cady gives Lola a look. “What?” 

“You told us you weren’t dating anybody!” Lola exclaims.

“I’m… not?” 

The only other barista currently working, Jake, looks at them. “Lola, what are you talking about?” he asks as Lola pulls out her phone. 

“She’s all over Instagram as Regina George’s secret fling!” Lola turns her phone to show everyone an Instagram post from an account called InfluencerNews . The photo is a paparazzi style shot of the pair on the Riverwalk last night, Cady leaning her head against Regina and Regina with her arm around Cady’s shoulders. The caption reads, Regina George spotted with mystery woman on the Chicago Riverwalk! Who could this elusive suitor be?

“Wait, wait, wait,” Jake says, grabbing Lola’s phone, and then looking up at Cady in shock. “Our regular is Regina George ? Is that why she said her name was Rachel for so long?” 

Cady holds up her hands in defense. “First off, we are not dating. We’re just friends. We were out with our other friends last night and it was cold . That’s all. Secondly, yes , that is Regina George.” 

“How the hell did you become friends with Regina George?” Lola asks, taking her phone back from Jake. 

“It’s a very long story,” Cady sighs. “I guess the very short version is that we went to high school together.” 

“Wait,” Jake tilts his head, “I thought you lived in Kenya?”

“I did ,” Cady says. “I did do one year of high school after moving to the states, but that is a very long story that I am not getting into right now. We reconnected recently and our old friend group has been catching me up.” Her three co-workers are still staring at her in shock. “Go look at Karen Shetty’s account.” 

“ Karen Shetty and Regina George are your friends ?” Lola nearly screams. Cady is grateful there’s no customers right now. 

“And Gretchen Wieners,” Cady adds, figuring it’s best to just rip off the bandaid now. 

Both of them start freaking out, and Cady is immediately overwhelmed. “Okay, okay,” she says. “I know, it’s wild, but I knew them before they were Insta-influencers or whatever.”

“Just influencers,” Lola corrects. They’re all used to Cady being out-of-date with lingo. They typically attribute it to her being old , in their words. 

“Right, well, point is, they’re regular people under all that influence or whatever. I get that it’s cool, but this is a lot .” She gestures to the two of them. “I don’t really know how no one recognized her over the last, like, six months, but I would appreciate it if you kept treating her like you normally do when she comes in here.” 

“I mean, she looked familiar, but I never expected Regina George to be a regular,” Jake admits. “I figured it was just someone who looked like her, even after she switched the name she was using. I thought she might be trying to pretend to be her or something.” 

Cady gives him a weird look. She opens her mouth to say something, but a couple comes in, and she’s suddenly at the register, her best customer service smile on her face. She’s so relieved to escape from the conversation. There’s a somewhat steady flow that follows, a handful of customers trickling in, preventing the two college students from pestering Cady for more information about her Instagram famous friends. 

Normally, Cady loves the slow Saturday shifts, but today is so draining. She's so tired, and wants to go home, but she’s stuck here, praying that enough people come in to not only pass the time, but also keep her nosy coworkers at bay. They slip in questions whenever there's a lull in customers, most of which Cady dodges. Half of them, she doesn't even understand , mostly because it seems that they're talking about social media things that Cady has never used or interacted with before. 

“It's so crazy that you don't know any of this stuff,” Lola says. “I mean, I know we call you old and stuff all the time, but you're friends with three huge influencers.”

Cady shrugs. “I’ve never been into social media. It's just not really my thing.”

“Well, it should be,” Jake chimes in. “With connections like that, you could get a hundred thousand followers in an hour, easily . You could be doing brand deals and stuff.”

Cady makes a face. “No thanks. I like to keep my life private.”

“We could tell,” remarks Jasmine. “Considering we don't really know much about you.”

“No offense, guys, but I come here to work, not really to make friends,” Cady tells them. “You guys are nice and all, but you're also college students with lives and homework and friends and parties and all of that. I’m not.”

“Cady!” the manager calls from the door to the back of the shop. “You're up for your break!” 

“On that note,” Cady says, before anyone else can say anything, “I’m on break. And no , I will not be answering questions in the break room.”

Cady slips into the back of the shop, beelining for the break room. She pulls her big, chunky headphones out of her bag; the ones she wears when she wants people to leave her alone . She pulls them out, syncs them with her phone, and collapses onto one of the small cushioned chairs in the room.

She's already got a couple messages from Regina, which she opens right away. 

Regina - 8:27am

Good morning! You were up at 4:30??? I didn't realize you were opening today oh my God I wouldn't have let us stay out so late!

Regina - 8:42am

Hey, so, I don't want you to worry or anything but when you can, we need to talk

Cady’s heart is in her throat. Yes , she knows that logically , this is probably about the pictures that leaked. Yes , she knows that logically , everything is going to be okay. That doesn't mean she doesn't immediately start to freak out a little about it. 

Cady - 9:01am

Is it about the photos of us from last night?

Cady - 9:01am

Also hi! I'm on break for the next fourteen minutes.

Regina - 9:01am

Hi!!! Yeah, it is. How’d you already find out?

Regina - 9:01am

I'm sorry, by the way. I was hoping I’d be able to talk to you before you found out.

Cady - 9:02am

My coworkers basically cornered me about it as soon as they got here. They were freaking out about it. I did my best to deflect them and stuff but they have been extremely persistent.

Cady - 9:02am

I'm literally hiding out in the break room with my big headphones on praying none of them come looking for me.

Regina - 9:03am

Shit, Cady, I'm so sorry. I should have been more careful about being in public and stuff. I haven't really dealt with much of this in Chicago. It happened a lot in New York. It got out at some point that I’ve dated women and suddenly every friend I’m spotted with is secretly my girlfriend!

Regina - 9:03am

There was even one outlet back in NYC that was running a whole conspiracy thing that I’m actually in a throuple with Gretchen and Karen. That one was a lot.

Cady - 9:04am

I'm not upset or anything, no need to be sorry. I just didn't realize this was something that could possibly happen. I don't think I'd care at all if it weren't for my damn coworkers. They suddenly think I'm the most interesting person in the world.

Regina - 9:04am

…Isn't that a good thing?

Cady - 9:04am

Not with these guys. They're only asking these questions because I'm connected to you. They're, like, polite to me, and stuff, but they don't care about me or my life. They're always talking about college stuff. I'm just the old full-timer who doesn't have a social life.

Regina - 9:05am

Again, you're not old, and you do have a social life now. 

Cady - 9:05am

They think I'm old is what I mean. And yeah, I know that, but they now only care about that because it's you and Gretchen and Karen specifically. It's because you're influencers.

Cady - 9:05am

Also I have no idea how this is going to play out the next time you come in. I hope they'll be normal about it but it entirely depends on who I'm on shift with, I guess.

Regina - 9:06am

Don't worry about me, I'm very used to stuff like that.

Regina - 9:06am

They'll get over themselves, because it's not like I'm vanishing just because they figured out who I am.

Regina - 9:06am

I'm kind of shocked it took them this long though if they seem to all be fans?

Cady - 9:06am

God the idea of fans is crazy to me.

Cady - 9:07am

But yeah, me too. One of them said they thought you looked familiar but never would have thought the Regina George would be a regular here.

Regina - 9:07am

Okay fair enough, I guess. 

Regina - 9:07am

What time do you get off shift today, by the way?

Cady - 9:07am

Noon. All my shifts are 5am-12pm.

Regina - 9:07am

Jesus that's early.

Regina - 9:07am

How’re you doing energy wise?

Cady - 9:08am

Honestly? Exhausted. I had so much fun last night but I don't think I can do that on a Friday again.

Cady - 9:08am

I think if I'd been able to just to go bed after I got home, I might have been fine though. Arguing with my mom kinda made that worse.

Regina - 9:08am

I thought it might, but I wasn't sure if I should bring it up while you were still at work. 

Cady - 9:09am

I have been trying to avoid thinking about it, so, good instinct.

Cady - 9:09am

As a rule, I prefer to not spiral at work at all, but especially not today while my coworkers are paying close attention to me for once.

Regina - 9:10am

Of course. We can talk about it more later if you want. 

Cady - 9:10am

Yeah, we probably should. It'll probably help to get it out of my head even though I am SO tired of talking about this over and over.

Regina - 9:10am

Don't worry about it right now. We’ll figure it out later. 

Regina - 9:10am

Anything else you wanna do this afternoon?

Cady - 9:11am

I'm not opposed to the movie idea after we do talk about it. But still no jumpscares.

Regina - 9:11am

I promise, no jumpscares.

Regina - 9:11am

We can pick something out together later. 

Regina - 9:11am

Do you want me to pick you up after your shift? 

Cady - 9:12am

Yes please. Last I saw, it looked like it was gonna rain.

Regina - 9:12am

Wait really? 

Cady - 9:12am

Yeah have you not looked outside yet?

Regina - 9:13am

I haven't really gotten out of bed yet. I've just been texting you 😅

Regina - 9:13am

Well, I woke up around 8:30, but I knew you'd be taking your break soon, and I didn't want to miss the chance to chat, so I just stayed in bed on my phone. 

Cady’s heart flutters as she smiles softly at her phone. She still cannot believe just how sweet Regina was to her. Not because she didn't trust her kindness, but because she wasn't used to anyone treating her this way. 

She spends far too long trying to figure out how to put that into words without immediately blurting out That’s so adorable, please be my girlfriend , and her alarm on her phone goes off, letting her know her break is up. 

She groans, pulling off the headphones (Which she never even put music on. Too distracted by Regina.) and shoving them back into her bag. She heads over to the timecard machine as she responds. 

Cady - 9:15am

1. That is super sweet and made me smile a lot.

2. I have to go, my break is up :( I'll see you at noon!!!

Regina - 9:15am

Have a great rest of your shift!! See you soon! 😊

Cady tucks her phone back into her pocket, takes a deep breath, and heads on out of the break room. 

Time to face the overly excited college students. 

Regina rolls over in bed, grinning to herself from ear to ear. Cady’s last text had made her heart soar and butterflies fill her stomach. God, she’s in so deep, but there’s no getting out of this. 

She knows that she promised multiple people, including Cady, that she’d be okay if Cady decided she just wanted to be friends. Regina knows that she would be, eventually, but the deeper she gets in this, the more that possibility would hurt. 

She keeps telling herself that these little moments they share, these glimpses of flirting… they're not one sided. At least, they don't feel like they are. Cady would shut her down if she felt uncomfortable, right? Cady has been very clear about all of her thoughts and feelings, not just the ones that relate to Regina. She would tell her, right ?

Regina steadies herself with a deep breath. She's getting herself worked up over nothing, and she knows it. She trusts Cady, and she trusts herself. Maybe this is what Cady wants, but she just wants to take it slow. Yes, that's probably it. She needs to calm down and not second-guess this stuff. 

Regina sits straight up in bed. She could be putting this anxious energy to better use instead. 

The last three hours of Cady’s shift drag by so unbelievably slowly. Her coworkers eventually give up on asking questions, but some leave and others join, all their shifts being shorter than hers. She’s one of the only full-timers on staff, and they typically only have one full-timer in at a time. The part-timers worked shorter shifts, at less regular times throughout the week. Cady’s schedule was set in stone, but most of her coworkers only found out their schedules every two weeks, with some preferences abided to. 

Cady does not envy the job of the managers. There are two of them, the morning manager and the afternoon manager, who switch off at the same time as the full-timers. The constantly rotating cast of college students (and their schedules changing every few months with classes) keeps the schedule from being too fixed, and of course, led to a litany of drama Cady had witnessed on the sidelines over the last five and a half years. It’s one of the major things the managers have to deal with on a daily basis.

The gossip about Cady and Regina continues to spread throughout the other staff that are arriving for their shifts. They ask Cady questions during the lulls, but Cady gives a lot of non-answers. She’s still pretty confused as to how no one realized that their regular, who looks like Regina George, used a fake name for five months, and now uses Regina when ordering, is actually Regina George. A few of them give a similar answer to Jake’s when she questions it, stating that they just thought she was a lookalike, since there was no way the real Regina George would be at this random coffee shop just off the UChicago campus. 

The whole idea of Regina being an influencer is still hard for Cady to wrap her mind around, in a way. Sure, Regina’s always been a very popular person, and, yes , it does make sense that it would carry on into her career, but she’s hardly heard Regina talk about social media in the time they’ve been speaking again. When Regina talks about work, she’s talking about her company. Having a couple million followers on Instagram appears to just be her side gig. 

The idea makes Cady’s head swim with a flurry of emotions. 

Cady is so lost in her own thoughts that she doesn’t notice right away when a new customer comes in and walks up to the counter. It’s only when she’s greeted with a familiar “Hey,” that she jumps, turning to face the customer, wide eyed. 

Her heartbeat calms back down when she realizes Regina is the one standing on the other side of the counter. 

“Oh, hi!” Cady replies, a smile growing on her face. “What are you doing here?”

Regina smiles back at her. “Figured I’d come get a coffee and chill for a bit before you get out of work.” 

Cady frowns. “Wait, what time is it?” She looks down at the screen on the register, which informs her that it’s a little after 11am. “I still don’t get off for another hour.”

“I know,” Regina shrugs. “But I was bored, so, here I am!” 

Cady laughs, shaking her head as she inputs Regina’s regular medium flat white with oat milk. “Any food today?”

“Hmm,” Regina says, peering up at the food menu. “What’s your favorite panini here?”

Cady shrugs. “I usually eat a muffin or something on my break, just as a snack.”

“Ah.” Regina mulls over her options for a few more moments. “I’ll do a turkey cheddar panini.”

“You got it!” Cady grins. “So, that’s $7.45 for the drink and $8.65 for the sandwich… after tax your total is $16.36!”

Regina visually watches as Cady punches the sandwich into the register, the total popping up several seconds after Cady reads it aloud. “Did you… did you just do that in your head?”

Cady blushes a bit. “Um, yeah, I mean, I’ve memorized most of the prices here.”

“But you did the tax, in like, a half a second.” 

Cady shrugs, hoping the way her cheeks pink isn’t too apparent. “I guess so.” 

Regina smiles lightly, tapping her phone against the payment pad. “You’ve still got it, Heron,” she winks, before tucking her phone back into her pocket and heading to the pickup area. 

Cady picks up the cup to write down the order and Regina’s name. She adds a little smiley face next to her name, before handing it off to another barista.

Her coworker looks at the cup and then smirks at her. 

“Sure, Cady,” they whisper, so only she can hear, “ just friends .” 

The last hour of Cady’s shift goes by much faster. There’s something about catching Regina sitting there, at her usual table, sneaking glances at her and pretending that she’s just on her phone, that makes the time fly. Noon finally rolls around, and Cady’s instantly in the back, clocking out and grabbing her bag, stuffing her apron inside before heading back into the dining area.

“Hi,” Cady says as she approaches Regina’s table. 

Regina looks up and smiles. “You ready?”

“Yep!” Cady rolls back on her heels, gripping the straps of her backpack. 

Regina’s smile gets even wider as she stands up, bringing her garbage over to the trash area. Just outside of the restaurant, Regina opens her umbrella, which is just big enough to fit both of them. Cady has a small umbrella tucked into her bag for emergencies, but she doesn’t even consider taking it out. It’s an excuse to walk right up against each other, lightly touching, but not holding hands.

“I actually managed to find some street parking,” Regina tells her as they head towards her car. “I guess because it’s Saturday.” 

“Oh, definitely because it’s Saturday,” Cady says with a nod. “There’s zero parking near campus on the weekdays. I hear them complain about it constantly .” Cady jerks her head back towards the coffee shop. 

“I’m sure they do,” Regina laughs. They reach the car, and Regina opens the passenger side door for Cady, so she can stay dry under the umbrella. Cady smiles at her as she gets in, tucking her backpack at her feet. Regina scurries around the other side with her umbrella, tucking it into the backseat as soon as she’s in the car. 

“Do you mind if I take a shower when I get to your place before we talk about stuff?” Cady asks meekly after Regina pulls out of the spot. “I always feel so gross after work. And I smell.”

Regina shrugs. “Sure, not a problem.” She’s quiet for a second, and then adds, “For the record, I think you smell great.”

Cady laughs. “G, I smell like coffee and sweat.”

“Maybe I like the smell of coffee,” Regina retorts, not missing a beat. 

“I also smell like sweat.” 

Regina laughs. “You don’t smell like sweat to me.”

“Oh? What do I smell like then?”

Regina pulls up to a stoplight, turning to face Cady. “Come here,” she says, and Cady looks at her, confused. Regina sighs. “Lean towards me so I can smell you, dork.” 

Cady blushes, but she leans across the space between them, trying very hard to ignore how badly she wants to kiss Regina right now. They’re so close, and those big, beautiful blue eyes are looking at her, taking her in. 

Regina’s nose flares, and she inhales the scent. She smirks, and Cady leans back, cheeks still pink. “Coffee,” Regina states, “You mostly smell like coffee. But you also smell like honeysuckle and vanilla.” 

Cady blinks. “Really? That’s the shampoo I use, but I haven’t showered since after work yesterday. I wouldn’t think it would linger for that long.”

“You always kinda smell like honeysuckle and vanilla,” Regina admits. “Even back in high school.”

Cady looks at her in disbelief. “You… remember what I smelled like in high school?” 

Regina nods, but a honk interrupts her. The light turned green, and she didn’t even notice. She pulls forward, continuing the short drive home. “Yeah, I um, I do. Yeah. I hope that’s not, um, not too much.” 

Cady stares at her for a long moment, Regina’s cheeks turning redder as her eyes don’t leave the road. “It’s not,” Cady says at last. “It’s really sweet, actually.” 

Regina lets out a sigh of relief. “Oh, thank God .” 

Cady giggles. “You’re not too much, Regina. Seriously. I’m just… I’m just still figuring stuff out, you know?”

Regina nods. “I know. I just don’t want you to feel pressured or anything.”

“I don’t,” Cady assures her. “You’re literally constantly checking with me. It’s really sweet.” 

Regina pulls into her garage. “Um, can I ask where you are on, like, figuring things out?”

“I think that’s a conversation we should have upstairs,” Cady tells her. “After I’ve showered.”

Regina chuckles. “Yes, after you’ve showered.” It doesn’t take long for Regina to pull into her spot in the garage, and the pair get out. Once they’re on the same side of the car, Regina extends a hand towards Cady, who takes it immediately. Regina squeezes once, and leads her inside. 

The shower is incredibly complicated, despite Regina’s best attempts to explain it to Cady. There’s multiple different temperature and pressure options, and eventually, Cady just gives up trying to remember what Regina explained to her and goes with whatever flows out of the showerhead. It’s decently warm, so she’ll take it. 

Using Regina’s toiletries gives Cady a little bit of a thrill , in a way. When she pops open the bottle of shampoo and smells the familiar strawberry scent she’s always associated with Regina, her heart beats faster and her stomach flips all at once. 

A part of her wants to just tell Regina, tell Regina everything she told her mother. The other part of her… well, she’s scared. She’s understandably very, very scared of what this means. Change has never been particularly easy for Cady, and she’s gotten comfortable in their current dynamic. 

But it’s not a sustainable dynamic, and Cady knows that. They can’t flirt and dance around their feelings forever. Something is going to have to change, one way or another. 

Cady can only hope she’s making the right decision. 

Chapter Text

Regina paces around the living room while Cady showers. She has so much built up anxious energy, and she has no idea what to do with it all. They have to talk, about a lot of things, and Regina is terrified that it’s going to go poorly. She still doesn’t know exactly what happened between Cady and her mom last night, but she has a general idea.

Dr. Heron hates her. She knows this. She understands why. She doesn’t exactly blame Dr. Heron for hating her. But somehow, she thought she would be able to continue to reconnect with Cady without this becoming a huge issue. 

Clearly, that was not the case. 

Whatever had been said, it had been enough for Cady to need Regina to stay on the phone with her until she fell asleep. On one hand, the fact Cady had called her made her heart swell with so much warmth. On the other, the fact Cady had needed that in order to fall asleep was a sign of just how bad it had been. 

Regina paces, fidgeting with her fingers as she walks. She hates feeling helpless. Almost everything she’s ever done in her life up until this point has been strategically planned to make sure she never feels helpless. 

She’s always had one weakness, and her name is Cady Heron. 

Back then, she’d felt helpless when Cady wanted Aaron, not her. She felt helpless when Cady looked so heartbroken , and she couldn’t do anything about it. She felt helpless when the things she did do made everything infinitely worse. She felt helpless when Gretchen told her she’d heard through the rumor mill that Cady was going to drop out. She felt helpless when she couldn’t bring herself to go to school on Cady’s 17th birthday. She felt helpless when she saw the Sold! sign on the old Heron house. 

She felt helpless when she saw that boy, the one who looked identical to Aaron. She felt helpless when Dr. Heron was yelling at her in Cady’s apartment. She felt helpless when Cady cried in her arms, and all Regina wanted to do was make everything bad in the world go away for her. 

Right now, she feels more helpless than she ever has, waiting for the inevitable to happen. Waiting to find out just how bad it all is. 

Cady comes out of the bathroom after a good forty-five minutes, hair still damp, in clean casual clothes. She finds Regina pacing in the living room, looking incredibly nervous.

“Hi,” Cady says softly, causing Regina to jump. “Sorry,” she adds quickly.

“No, no, you’re fine. I was just in my head,” Regina assures her. She gestures over to the couch. “Do you wanna sit?”

Cady nods, tucking her backpack against the side of the couch and taking a seat. Regina sits down next to her, looking unsure. “Yes, G, you can sit next to me,” Cady tells her, a tiny smile on her face. “It’s not too much.” 

Regina smiles back sheepishly, before relaxing a bit more into the spot. Cautiously, she wraps an arm around Cady’s shoulders. Instantly, Cady leans into the touch, resting her head against Regina’s shoulder and pulling her legs up onto the couch, so she could tuck herself in neatly against Regina.

Regina smiles softly, rubbing Cady’s shoulder lightly. “You comfortable?”

“Absolutely,” Cady tells her, before taking a deep breath. “This is gonna suck.” 

“I’m right here,” Regina says. “And if you need to stop, we can.” 

“I know, but I just need to get this over with. I’m so tired of talking about it,” Cady sighs. “But my mother…” She closes her eyes, taking another deep breath before starting. “When I got home last night, my mom was up waiting for me. She immediately accused me of drinking, showing me Karen’s post as proof. I told her that it was a mocktail, but she didn’t believe me.” 

Cady looks down at her hands, which are awkwardly sitting in her lap. “She said a bunch of really awful stuff. She suggested that maybe you were trying to mess with my meds. She also implied she thinks I’m stupid. The rest of it was all the same argument as always, that you’re no good, I shouldn’t talk to you, all of that. But I was so angry about the drinking thing, the fact she wouldn’t believe me, all of it. I took it to another level.”

Regina squeezes Cady’s shoulders lightly. “What happened?” 

“I brought up my dad.”

Regina frowns slightly. “I don’t think I know anything about your dad.” 

Cady sighs. “Yeah, I don’t really talk about him with anyone, ever. I’m… trying to figure out how to say it.”

“Well, and, by no means, am I trying to compare anything, but you know I’m a part of the shitty dads club, so…”

Cady shakes her head. “He wasn’t a shitty dad. He had… he had really bad depression. He did some treatments and stuff, but it didn’t really work for him. My mom spent a lot of time taking care of him. It started right before I was born.”

Regina frowns. She doesn't like where this is going, but waits for Cady to continue. 

Cady is staring across the room now, not really wanting to look directly at Regina. “He lost the battle when I was three. It’s one of the several reasons my mom is the way that she is.” 

“I’m sorry, I… I want to make sure I’m understanding.” Regina pauses, looking at Cady, who’s still staring at the far wall. “Did your father…?”

“Kill himself, yeah,” Cady confirms, looking back down at her hands. “My mom, she couldn’t… she couldn’t stay where we were. Her way of grieving is running away. So that’s what we did. As soon as the funeral was over, she started applying to different international research positions. That’s how we ended up in Kenya.” Cady frowns. “I don’t really remember him. A couple things, here and there, but not a lot. The color of his hair, his little glasses… He was a biologist too, like my mom. They met in graduate school, in Denver. Pretty much everything I know about him comes from my mom. I didn’t know what happened for a really long time. I just knew that he died.” 

“I was thirteen when I found out,” Cady says quietly. “There was a Peace Corps guy who’s brother back home took his own life while he was stationed out in Kenya. I didn’t… I didn’t understand how a person could do that to their family, their friends. I was really upset about it. My mom had to sit me down and explain things to me. Had to explain my dad to me. It… it was pretty life changing.”

“Thirteen seems so young to learn about that,” Regina comments, but she immediately regrets it. “I’m sorry, I mean, I don’t-.”

“It’s okay,” Cady cuts her off. “You’re right. It was young. But I’m glad she did. It helped me understand what happened when I was 16.” Cady starts rubbing her left forearm with her right hand absentmindedly. “I was always more likely to end up with depression. It probably would have come a bit later in life, like my dad’s did, but that’s not really based on any research or anything. I just… I feel like it would have. I don’t know. Maybe not. Aaron’s death jumpstarted it. My mother is convinced that if things hadn’t happened with you the way they did, that it wouldn’t have happened. That I wouldn’t have gotten depressed.” Cady lets out a little laugh. “She doesn’t like to acknowledge that my father had clinical depression. They didn’t call it that back then. I don’t know what they called it, but I know the names have changed. Technically, what I have is Major Depressive Disorder, but it’s also just clinical depression. Anyways ,” Cady sighs, “the family therapists used to bring it up and stuff, but it was the one thing my mom never really worked on the way she should have. She doesn’t want us to have the same thing. I’m pretty sure she’s convinced herself that if I have the same thing my dad did, that means I’m going to kill myself one day too.”

Regina’s grip on Cady reflexively tightens, her posture straightening. 

“I won’t be doing that,” Cady assures her, putting a hand on Regina’s knee. “I have gotten through the worst of it. I know that. Even when I was at my worst, I was never planning to do anything. It was passive at best.”

Regina feels her heart drop into her stomach. “Passive?”

Cady bites her lip. Maybe she shouldn’t have said that. It’s too late now, though. She’s already mentioned it. “I have passive suicidal ideation,” Cady says softly. 

Regina’s grip tightens even more. “Cady,” she says quietly, her voice alarmed, “what does that mean?” 

Cady swallows. “It means I have had suicidal thoughts before,” she says, as clinically as possible, “but I’ve never acted on them or had the intent to act on them.” 

Regina is silent for a long moment. “Was… was that because of me?” she finally asks, her voice in a near whisper. 

Cady stares at her hands. She doesn’t want to tell her the truth. She doesn’t want to hurt Regina. But she knows lying is a bad idea. “It started after the funeral,” she says, very, very quietly. “But they were at their worst after I dropped out. The first summer in Chicago… It was hard. Really hard.” 

Cady can feel Regina shaking now. Cady turns, wrapping an arm around Regina’s middle and burying her face into Regina’s shoulder. “I’m okay now,” she says quietly. “I promise, I’m okay.”

Regina wraps both arms around Cady, pulling her in close. She’s still shaking, and her breathing is rapid and shallow. Her throat feels like it’s starting to close up, and she’s starting to panic.

“Regina?” Cady says softly, looking up. “Please say something.”

Regina’s not looking back at her. She’s staring off into space, with a horrified, guilty look on her face. Her breathing isn’t right, and she’s shaking like a leaf. Cady scoots into a sitting position, reaching up and grabbing both sides of Regina’s face. 

“Regina, look at me,” she says, pulling Regina’s face down towards her. “I’m okay. I promise you, I’m okay. It’s okay.” 

“It’s not okay,” Regina says quietly, tears welling up in her eyes. “Cady… I…” 

“Shh,” Cady says, pressing her forehead against Regina’s. “Close your eyes, and breathe with me. Please?” 

Regina closes her eyes, and Cady counts them through a few deep breaths. Cady strokes the side of Regina’s face gently, trying to soothe her. It’s only when Regina’s shaking subsides that Cady tries to actually talk again. 

“Regina,” she says softly, and the other girl’s eyes are open at once, “the reason I tell you this isn’t because I blame you or I want you to blame yourself.”

“But it’s my fau-.”

“It is not your fault,” Cady insists. “Regina, did you hear what I said before? My father had the same thing I do. This stuff is genetic , on some level. My chances of ending up with similar symptoms and a similar diagnosis have always been extremely high . I don’t blame you . My brain isn’t wired correctly. It doesn’t know how to function properly. I’m on a lot of meds and in a lot of therapy to help it do its job. And it does now. I am okay . In fact, I’m more than okay. These last couple of weeks, I’ve been happier than I’ve been in a long time.” 

Regina’s eyes search Cady’s. “I never wanted to hurt you,” she says, so softly, it hardly comes out. “I’m so sorry.” 

“I know,” Cady says. “Regina, I forgive you .”

Regina blinks. “You… forgive me ?”

“I do,” Cady replies, nodding gently. She strokes Regina’s cheek again. “Remember how we’re going to be honest with each other now?”

Regina nods.

“This is as honest as I can be. What happened, happened. I got sick after, but the fact I have depression at all is not your fault . It would have happened anyway, at some point. My brain doesn’t function the way it’s supposed to, but it never has . And I forgive you for what happened. Okay?”

Regina nods again, carefully. “Okay,” she says quietly.

Cady pulls her forehead away from Regina’s, stroking her face one more time before curling up against her again. This time, she doesn’t hide her face from Regina. She sits right up against her, wrapping an arm around Regina’s middle. “Are you okay for me to talk about my mom again?”

“Am I okay?” Regina asks, almost laughing a little. “I’m sorry. You shouldn’t have to ask me that. I’m… I should be better.” She wipes a couple tears out of her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

“G, you don’t have to be sorry for having emotions,” Cady tells her. “I knew this was going to suck . I knew it was going to be a lot . And I know some of this stuff is really intense. It’s something I’m used to talking about now. I’ve talked about it for hours on end in therapy. But if it’s not something you’re used to, it can be a lot at once. And I want to make sure you’re okay, because your feelings matter too.” 

Regina takes a deep breath, trying to calm herself down. Cady’s right, and she knows it. “I’m okay,” Regina says with a little nod. “I’m okay.”

“Okay,” Cady nods. “So, my mom, she doesn’t see all of this the same way I do. She doesn’t like to acknowledge the genetic link between my dad and I, despite being a biologist. It’s come up a couple times in therapy before, but she always shuts it down. And then last night… She was so all over the place. She was angry with me and upset with me and said all those awful things and it was just too much . And I brought up my dad and she was not happy about it.” Cady frowns, looking down at her lap again. “She didn’t believe me when I said I’m happier now than I have been in years. Which, I mean, I guess comparatively, yeah, I’ve been happier the last few years than I was before that. But I was like, actively in programs and all that before. The bar was really low. That didn’t mean I was happy .”

Cady shakes her head. “I know why she saw it that way. She wants to believe, so desperately, that I’m completely better. That my depression is just gone . But it’s not. I still have episodes. I will for the rest of my life. It doesn’t just go away entirely.” 

“Episodes like what happened that day at the coffee shop?” Regina asks. “With that boy?”

Cady shakes her head. “No, nothing like that in years. A couple times a year, I go through a rough patch. Same times of the year, like clockwork. November, around Aaron’s anniversary, and June, around my birthday. I take a couple weeks off work and just focus on self care and stuff. There’s days around those times that I’m just… Overwhelmed with memories and emotions and guilt and regret and I just don’t get out of bed. But I have extra therapy around that time, and I do what I need to do to be okay. And then it passes, because it always does, and I’m stable again.” 

Regina looks down at her lap. “I’m sorry.”

“Not your fault,” Cady reminds her gently, before continuing. “Last night, my mom asked me why I’ve been so happy lately. She couldn’t understand… she couldn’t understand why you make me happy.” 

Regina looks up. “I do?”

Cady smiles gently. “Of course you do. What did you think I’ve been talking about every time I say I’ve been happier lately?”

Regina shrugs lightly. “I guess just… having friends nearby again. Like, not just me. Gretchen and Karen too.”

“Being around Gretchen and Karen again does also make me happy,” Cady admits, “but they don’t hold a candle to you.” 

Regina’s chest swells. Tears start to form in her eyes again. “I’m sorry,” she says quietly, moving her hand to wipe them away, but Cady beats her to it. Her fingers are soft and gentle, and the touch makes Regina melt. 

“You're always saying you've got me,” Cady tells her, “but I've got you too, you know.”

Regina nods slightly, bringing up a hand to cup Cady’s hand on her cheek. She nuzzles into it gently, bringing a smile to Cady’s face. 

“My mother asked me why I’m happy now,” Cady says softly, her eyes not leaving Regina's. “And I told her. This is why.” 

She leans in, gently capturing Regina’s lips with hers. Regina gasps lightly at the contact, before kissing her back almost immediately. Regina wraps her arms tightly around Cady, who’s holding her face with both hands again. It's a soft kiss, gentle and loving, every ounce of care and affection spilling out between them. 

It's everything either of them has ever wanted. 

Cady pulls back, coming up for air. She presses her forehead against Regina’s, moving her arms to behind Regina’s neck after tucking a piece of loose hair behind Regina’s ear. 

“You, um, I, uh,” Regina stumbled through her words, her eyes searching back and forth in Cady's.

Cady smiles and laughs lightly. “I figured out what I want.”

Regina leans back in, kissing Cady harder, more passionately. Cady meets her energy, thinking about just how soft Regina’s lips are and how perfectly they fit together.

“It's you,” Cady manages to get out in-between kisses. “It's always been you.”

When they finally break apart again, Cady’s practically sitting on Regina’s lap, Regina cradling her in her arms. They can't stop staring at each other, wide eyed, as they try to catch their breath. 

“Is it okay if I finish my story?” Cady asks quietly. “Before we talk about what this means?”

“Of course,” Regina says with a little nod. She rubs Cady’s back lightly, her arms wrapped around her. 

Cady leans her head against Regina’s shoulder. “I told my mom I liked you, and that you liked me back. It was the first time I really admitted to myself my feelings. I knew earlier last night though, on the Riverwalk.”

Regina smiles, pressing a gentle kiss to the top of Cady's head, the only spot she can reach from Cady’s current angle. “I felt it last night. I wanted to so bad, but I was worried I was misreading things.”

“No,” Cady smiles, melting a little bit at the soft kiss. “You were right. I think I might have if we weren't interrupted. I was so genuinely happy in that moment.” 

Regina tightens her grip on her. “Good.”

“So, my mom freaked out a little bit more. I ended up just like… word vomiting all my feelings out and it was the first time I was acknowledging pretty much all of them at all.” She smiles softly at the memory, but then it vanishes. “She just wanted to keep berating me and if anything, I think it just freaked her out even more. Then I started crying and I fully snapped on her like I did with Damian and Janis the other day.” 

“You stood up for yourself,” Regina corrects. 

“I did,” Cady admits. “I stood up for myself and then I locked myself in my room and called you.” She frowns lightly. “I never checked to see if Gretchen or Karen responded to the group chat.” 

“They did earlier, while you were at work,” Regina tells her. “In between your break and when I showed up. Gretchen asked me in private what happened and I told her you got into a big fight but I didn't know the details. They both blocked her, though. I think they just wanna make sure you're okay.”

Cady smiles softly. “I’ll text them a little later and explain about the drinking thing. Not sure about the everything else just yet.” 

Regina nods, reaching up and running her fingers through Cady’s hair. Cady melts into the touch immediately, letting out a tiny sigh of relief. 

“I'm sorry all that happened with your mom,” Regina says quietly. “But I'm very proud of you for standing up for yourself. And for coming out, I think?” 

“I guess so,” Cady lets out a tiny laugh. “I still don't really know if I have, like, a label or anything. Bisexual, I guess? I don't know.”

“You’ve got all the time in the world to figure it out. If you even want a label, anyways,” Regina tells her. 

Cady nods. “I know. But, yeah, I guess it was coming out. She didn't seem to care too much about the woman part of things.”

“She just cares that it's me , specifically.”

“Yeah,” Cady sighs. “I don't really know what I'm gonna say to her when I get home.” Cady tenses up, clinging to Regina more. “I am so tired of having the same fight over and over again and even though I don't regret anything I said, I'm afraid I made things worse.”

Regina rubs her back again, gently and soothingly. “I know, baby.” She feels the way Cady relaxes against her at the pet name, and smiles softly. “We’ll figure it out, okay?” 

“Okay,” Cady replies with a little nod. She adjusts herself lightly in Regina’s lap, getting more comfortable. Regina smiles, adjusting her grip so Cady can snuggle in closer. “I guess we should talk about what just happened,” Cady says quietly once she's settled in again. 

“We should,” Regina agrees. “I, um, really wasn't expecting you to do that, but I'm really glad you did.”

Cady smiles softly, looking up at Regina. “I wasn't expecting to do it either, if I'm being honest. I told myself I was going to just tell you about my feelings and figure out how to take it slow from there.” She lets out a tiny laugh. “So much for that.”

“We can still take things at whatever pace you want,” Regina tells her, rubbing her back. “That’s still the pace I want to go. Your pace.”

“I’d like that,” Cady says. “To still take things slow, I mean. I just…” She trails off, lost in thought.

“You don't have to explain yourself. I get it.”

“No, but I want to,” Cady insists. “There's two parts to it, I think. For one, I've never been in a relationship before. Like at all. So that's a little scary. But then there's also, like, the part of me that's still having the… the trauma response to the past.” Cady says the last few words very quietly, as if it might ruin everything between them. 

Regina, to her credit, just nods and keeps rubbing Cady’s back. “That's okay. I know it's going to take longer than a few weeks to fully get past that stuff. Even if you have forgiven me.”

“Which I have,” Cady reminds her. 

“Which you have,” Regina says with a little smile. “Like I said, I'm more than happy to go at whatever pace you want. And, really, I like the idea of taking it slow. I don't wanna mess this up. You're too special to me.”

Cady blushes, pressing herself against Regina’s shoulder. 

“No, come back,” Regina says softly, a smile still on her face. “You're so cute when you blush.”

Cady buries her face further at the compliment. Regina kisses the top of her head again, which gets Cady to peek up. 

“There she is,” Regina says with a smile. “ Adorable .” 

Cady blushes again, but she doesn't hide this time. She leans her head up, and kisses Regina again. It's not a particularly long kiss, because they're at a pretty awkward angle, but it settles all the emotions swirling around inside her. 

After they pull back, Cady leans against Regina’s shoulder again. They sit in a comfortable silence for a few seconds, before Regina speaks again. 

“If there's anything I do that's too much too quickly, I want you to tell me, okay? I won't be mad or anything, I promise.”

“Okay,” Cady replies with a nod. “I’m not sure that this will happen, but the same goes for your okay?”

Regina smiles. “Okay, baby.” 

Cady nuzzles in closer at the name. “I like that,” she says softly. 

Regina laughs lightly. “I can tell.” 

Cady is quiet for a moment, and then sighs. “What am I gonna tell my mom?” 

“Well,” Regina begins, rubbing Cady's back again, “I don't think lying to her is going to get us very far. She already doesn't trust me as it is.”

“Yeah,” Cady sighs. “I mean, it's not like she can stop me from seeing you. I'm 26 years old. And she's certainly not going to kick me out or anything.”

“I would hope not, but God forbid, if something like that does happen, I've got you.” Regina tightens her grip on Cady. “I promise, I've got you.”

“I know you do,” Cady says with a little smile. “But that's not going to happen. She’s probably just going to try to fight me about it, like, twenty-four seven.” Her smile vanishes.

“If that's the case, I'll get you out of there as often as I can,” Regina promises. “Whatever happens, we’ll figure it out.”

“Yeah,” Cady smiles again. “We will.” 

“I guess there's one more thing we need to talk about,” Regina says, almost hesitant. “The picture that leaked last night.”

Cady laughs. “Oh, yeah. I forgot about that, to be honest.” 

Regina smiles. “Me too, kind of. But I'm imagining your mother spotting that on Instagram and how that would go. It's not like we can convince every wannabe paparazzi to block her Instagram too.” 

“Does stuff like this happen often?” Cady asks her. 

Regina shrugs. “I haven't been on one of those sites since coming to Chicago. It used to happen a lot more in New York, but there’s also a bigger influencer scene there. Nowhere near as bad as L.A., though.” She laughs lightly. “It's funny, because I didn't come out to anyone until the other week, but I've been caught on dates in public with women before. Between that and my proximity to Gretchen and Karen, there's been a lot of speculation about my sexuality. There's even a whole subsection of our fans who are convinced we’re in a throuple.”

Cady can't help but laugh at that. “You mentioned that earlier, but I didn't really acknowledge it. I mean, really ?”

“Really,” Regina confirms with a nod. “But, yeah. I can't say for sure how often it'll happen in Chicago. You aren't on social media or anything, so I expect they'll move on pretty quickly. But it could happen again, until we’ve publicly acknowledged it in some way. Which, of course, we won't do unless you want to and until you're ready.”

“I want to,” Cady tells her, “just… not right away.” 

Regina smiles. “We’ll figure it out as we go. We might get photographed like that again, though. I don't have a lot of control over that.” 

“That's okay,” Cady says. “I don't want to like… not hold your hand and stuff in public because of it. But maybe no kissing in public?” 

“That sounds great to me.” Regina runs her fingers through Cady’s hair, who hums and snuggles closer to her. 

“That feels good,” Cady murmurs, tucking her head against the crook of Regina’s neck. 

“Your hair is so soft,” Regina replies quietly. “I like playing with it.” 

Cady hums again, letting herself soak up the gentle attention. “I'm really glad I listened to my gut and kissed you.” 

Regina chuckles lightly, twirling Cady’s hair in her fingers. “I'm really glad you kissed me too.” 

After their long talk, Regina insists on making them both something to eat. It's the late afternoon, and Regina realizes that Cady hasn't eaten anything other than a muffin that day. 

“I think it was only maybe half the muffin,” Cady admits. “I don't think I finished it.” 

That does it. Regina untangles herself from Cady and insists on making them a late lunch/early dinner. 

Cady tries to protest at first, but Regina gives her a look. 

“Cady,” Regina says quietly, “I know your meds mess with your appetite, but you still need to eat.” 

Cady sighs. “I know. I just kinda forget sometimes.”

Regina takes Cady’s hand, leading her into the kitchen. Cady sits at the table while Regina moves around the kitchen, making them some food. “What do you usually eat in a day?” 

Cady shifts in her chair nervously. “Um, if I'm working, usually I'll have a muffin at some point during the morning. Typically on my break. I don't usually finish all of it, but I usually eat more than half. I forget about lunch a lot, but sometimes I'll have like, half a Kalteen bar if I'm hungry. And then dinner is just whatever my mom and I are doing that night.” 

“Which are usually smaller portions, right?” 

Cady nods sheepishly. “Um, yeah, I guess. My perspective of it is a little skewed I think. It feels like a normal amount to me, but I guess not.” 

Regina hums. “When you order takeout, how long do your leftovers usually last?”

“Three days at a minimum,” Cady replies. “Sometimes four. Depends on the food. Usually some of it ends up going bad before I get to eat it.” 

Regina stops where she is, taking a deep breath. She walks over to the table, and sits down next to Cady, taking her hands. “I don’t want you to think that what I’m about to say is a comment about your body,” she begins, “because I very purposefully do not comment on other people’s bodies.” 

Cady’s shoulders slump. “I know I don’t eat enough. I know . I just…” She looks down at her lap. “This is a lot better than it used to be.” 

Regina just nods carefully, squeezing Cady’s hands slightly. “I bet it is. We still have a ways to go, though, right?”

“You sound like my nutritionist,” Cady says with a little laugh.

“You have a nutritionist?” 

Cady nods. “The office where I have therapy has this whole comprehensive thing. It’s a community health center. I have my therapist, my psychiatrist, my PCP, my nutritionist, my dentist, my eye doctor, and my pharmacist all under one roof.” She shrugs. “I got set up in a special program there after I was discharged from the hospital program.” 

Regina squeezes Cady’s hands. “What’s your nutritionist’s plan?” 

“Well, for a long time, it was just getting me to eat more than just Kalteen bars every day,” Cady admits. “I’ve been doing pretty good at having at least one meal for like, I don’t know, four or five months now? I don’t think I’ve only had Kalteen bars since then. Well, except for those two weeks after… well, you know.” 

Regina nods. “Do you know what the next steps are?”

“Two consistent meals a day,” Cady tells her. “Sometimes I do. I just forget a lot when I’m home after work, because I don’t get hungry.” 

“I can work with that,” Regina nods again. “I can remind you to eat, if it’ll help.” 

Cady smiles softly. “That’s very sweet, but I don’t want you to feel, like, responsible for me like that.” 

Regina gives her a look. “Cady.” 

“Yeah?”

“Did we not just establish the whole… whatever this is turning into, over on the couch?”

“We did.” 

“Have I not told you enough that I care about you? Like, a lot? Because I do.”

Cady blushes. “Regina…”

“I don’t feel responsible for you, but I do care about you, and how little you eat does worry me,” Regina tells her. “So I’m going to start checking in and reminding you to eat. If that’s okay with you,” she tacks on at the end. She rubs circles on the back of Cady’s hands with her thumbs, which soothes her. 

“Okay,” Cady sighs. “I’m okay with that.” 

“Good,” Regina says, bringing Cady’s hand to her mouth and kissing her knuckles. She watches the way Cady smiles at the contact, before lowering Cady’s hand back to the table. Regina stands up, heading back towards the kitchen. “Anything in particular you hungry for?” 

Cady shakes her head. “Pretty sure we just established I rarely get hungry. I’m down for whatever. I just don’t know how much of it I’ll eat.” 

Regina hums. She thinks about the fact that every time she’s eaten with Cady, Cady has eaten everything in front of her. She decides not to say anything about it, not wanting to break the potentially subconscious chain that had begun. She’s going to ride this phenomenon for as long as she can, whether or not Cady realizes what’s happening. 

Admittedly, her fridge is fairly empty, but she has some leftover potato leek soup from the other night. She makes two small bowls of the soup, heating them up in the microwave one by one, while she sorts through the minimal ingredients she has to see what else she can add. She finds a pack of turkey bacon, and some leftover lettuce and tomato. 

She moves quickly, the BLTs being simple enough to make. She knows Cady is watching her, with those soft, gentle eyes, and Regina has to do everything she can to keep herself focused on the task. It was harder than the last time she’d cooked for Cady, as even though that meal had been much more complicated, Cady was still pretty upset that night, and mostly just stared into space from the kitchen table. Today, however, she was smiling softly at Regina, and any amount of eye contact would stop Regina in her tracks. 

They had kissed . They both want a relationship, and goddammit, they're going to get there, even if Cady wants to take it slow. The thing Regina has wanted since the very first day she met Cady is finally happening. 

To Regina’s smug delight, Cady eats the whole meal, again . She does her best to not show it outwardly, but she’s damn proud of both Cady and herself for somehow being consistent at this. 

Cady helps Regina with the dishes, despite Regina’s protests. 

“If you’re going to make me food, the least I can do is help clean up,” Cady tells her. “Besides, you have a dishwasher. It’s not like it’s hard.” 

“Yeah, but-.”

Regina is cut off by a kiss from Cady, which she melts right into. She drops her hands to Cady’s waist, pulling her in close. 

Cady smiles against Regina’s lips. “I love this new trick.” 

“Hey,” Regina smirks back, “no fair.” 

“Oh, I’m sure you’ll use it on me plenty too,” Cady laughs. She presses her lips against Regina’s again, and they get lost in each other for a little while. It’s so soft and simple, Cady feels like she could do it forever. Never in a million years did she imagine she’d be kissing Regina George in her kitchen, but she couldn’t be happier to be here. 

Regina leads Cady out of the kitchen, towards the living room. Cady doesn’t realize right away that Regina is tricking her away from cleaning up, until Regina gently lowers her onto the couch. She leans over Cady, kissing her again passionately, before quickly pulling away.

“Be right back,” Regina says with a grin, scurrying off to the kitchen.

Cady’s brain is foggy as she blinks, realizing what Regina had done. “Hey!” she calls, starting to stand up from the couch.

“Stay there!” Regina calls back. “Just one second!” 

Cady huffs, crossing her arms as she leans back in her seat. She hears the sink running, the clacking of the dishes slotting into the dishwasher, and then it being shut. She gives Regina a look as she returns to the living room. “That wasn’t fair.” 

“Baby, when have I ever played fair?” Regina asks, a mischievous grin on her face. She plops down on the couch next to Cady. “So, wanna watch that movie?”

Cady’s eyes drift down to Regina’s lips. “I mean, we could… but I also have something better.” 

Regina raises an eyebrow. “And what might that be?”

Cady smirks, moving to swing a leg over Regina’s lap. Regina’s arms quickly go to stabilize Cady, supporting her back as she settles in. Cady pushes her hair behind one ear and looks down at Regina from this angle, grinning. 

“This,” Cady says, as she leans in, kissing Regina with every ounce of fire and passion she could manage. Regina gasped, returning the kiss and gripping hard onto Cady on top of her.

Yeah, Cady was right. This was better than a movie.

Chapter Text

Cady stands outside the front door to her apartment, rubbing her arm with her hand. She’s been standing there for several minutes now, not wanting to put her key in the door and turn the lock. 

Today had been such a rollercoaster of emotions for Cady. Work had been incredibly draining, and she was already running on less sleep than she normally got. But then Regina had shown up an hour early, and it made her whole day better.

Regina . 

The entire afternoon was such a constant battle between highs and lows. She had been cuddling on the couch with Regina, telling her about the awful fight with her mom, and then Regina had started to panic when Cady told her about the passive suicidal thoughts. 

There was a part of her, a part that didn’t want to hurt Regina, that berated Cady for making that mistake. The other part of her, the part that had won out, was the part that knew it had been the right thing to do. 

Honesty needs to be a cornerstone of this… well, whatever it is, if it’s going to work. Cady knows that, and she’s pretty sure Regina does too. 

But Cady had succeeded at calming Regina down and kissed her . Cady had kissed Regina! The simple memory makes Cady’s heart flutter. 

They talked more, ate lunch, kissed a lot more, before Regina ordered take-out dinner for both of them. They weren’t super hungry, with the late lunch, so they ended up splitting a pizza. It had been such a simple thing, but it had made Cady so unbelievably happy.

But then Regina had to take her home. They both wanted Cady to stay, but they knew Betsy was waiting for her. They knew if Regina didn’t bring Cady home, all hell would break loose. 

So, against every wish and every fiber of her being, Cady finds herself standing outside her apartment door, staring at the inevitable. She doesn’t want to do it. She doesn’t want to fight with her mom again. She doesn’t want to tell her what an incredible day she had, because she knows it’s going to create an even bigger fight. 

God, when did this all get so complicated?

Cady took a deep breath, closing her eyes. She can’t stand out here forever, despite how badly she wants to. She slips her key into the lock, and opens the front door. 

Betsy sits on the couch, looking up immediately, as soon as Cady walks in. She looks awful . She’s got bags under her eyes, and she’s… wearing the same clothes as she did last night. That’s highly unusual for her mother. She has a blanket wrapped around her shoulders, and looks so genuinely relieved to see her daughter walk through the door. 

“Cady,” she says softly, “I’m so glad you’re home.”

Cady stares at her for a moment. “Are you okay?” 

“Come sit,” Betsy says quietly, patting the spot next to her. 

Cautiously, Cady puts her bag down near the entrance, and walks over to the couch. She sits down next to her mom, who takes her hand. 

“I’m sorry about last night,” Betsy begins. “I wasn’t fair to you. I… I decided that the worst was happening again, and I panicked, and I spiraled, and it wasn’t okay.” 

Cady looks at her mom and smiles. “Thank you. I really appreciate that.” 

Betsy nods lightly. “I… did a lot of thinking. Last night and today. Like, a lot of thinking.” She sighs. “You’re right about a lot of things. I just never really wanted to admit them.” 

Cady squeezes her mom’s hand. “Mom, it’s okay.”

“No, it’s not,” Betsy shakes her head. “The things that you said about your father…” She looks down at her lap. “I never really let myself admit those things. I always worried about you ending up like him, but I never really acknowledged that you were likely to have similar problems. I spent so long trying to prevent the worst, that I lost focus on what actually makes you different from him.” Tears are beginning to well up in Betsy’s eyes now, threatening to spill over. 

Cady wraps her arms around her mother, pulling her into a tight hug. As soon as they connect, Betsy begins to cry. Cady holds her close, rubbing her back and not saying a word. Her mom needs this. Cady knows that. She lets her let it out, like she’s done for Cady so many times before. 

“I just want you to be happy,” Betsy croaks between sobs. “I’ve been doing a terrible job.”

“No, no you have not ,” Cady tells her, holding her close. “You have done an incredible job, Mom. I’m here . I’m alive . And you know what, Mom? I am happy. I’m happier now than I have been in a long time.” She squeezes her mother tight. “You always did everything you could for me. You and I both know that it hasn’t always been easy.” 

Betsy lets out a small chuckle, wiping the tears from her eyes. “That’s one way to put it.”

Cady smiles softly, pulling back from the hug. “But you’ve done a really good job, Mom. Things are just changing. And I know that it’s scary, but I can’t stay like this forever. You know that, right?”

Betsy sighs, closing her eyes and nodding. “I know that. There’s just this part of me… this part of me that’s so scared that if things change, they’re going to go back to the way things were.” She opened her eyes again, looking up at the ceiling and trying to blink the tears away. “I don’t know that we can go through all of that again.”

“Mom,” Cady says lightly, taking her mother’s hand in her own, “even if things don’t go perfectly, I’m better . I’m so much better than I was back then. I have medications and coping skills and a lot of experience turning things around. I’ll be okay. That was rock bottom. I’m out of that, and I’m never going back.” 

“But what if you do?” Betsy whispers.

“That’s not going to happen,” Cady insists. “But either way, I can’t live my life in fear of going back there. If I do, I’m never going to take risks.” She gestures around them. “I love you, Mom, but we both know I can’t stay here forever. I can’t work as a barista until the end of time.” She sighs. “And one day, hopefully far, far in the future from now, you won’t be around anymore, and I’m going to have to navigate things by myself.” She gives her mother the saddest smile. “I know when that day comes, I’ll be okay, but I have to be able to take the risks so I know what to do. So I know how to live .” 

Betsy’s shoulders slump, but she nods. “I know,” she says quietly. “I know. I did a lot of thinking today, about my mom, and how my relationship with her was so different from ours. She loved me and supported me, always, but she always encouraged me to chase my dreams.” She smiles softly at Cady. “I’ve wanted a PhD since I was in high school. I finally did it, all these years later. And I wanted a family.” She squeezes Cady’s hand. “That one came a lot sooner, but I don’t regret any of it. What I do regret is not letting you take those same risks.” 

“It was kinda important that you didn’t let me, for a little while,” Cady tells her with a little smile. “But that time is over now.” 

“I know,” Betsy sighs. “I just… I know that Regina ,” she makes a big effort to not sneer at the name, “is a part of your life now, and I’m still trying to get used to that.” She takes a deep breath. “I still don’t trust her, but I know you do. And I’m trying, I really am trying, to be okay with that. It’s just going to take me some time.” 

Cady nods and smiles. “Thank you, Mom. I know it’s not going to be instant. But I do need you to stop telling me you think it’s a bad idea every time I see her.” 

Betsy closes her eyes and nods. “I know. I’m going to try very hard to stop doing that.” 

Cady squeezes her hand again. “Thank you.” She looks down at her lap. “There is something you should know, though.”

Betsy’s eyes shoot open, looking at her daughter. “What?”

Cady bites her lip. This was going so well, so much better than she possibly could have expected. She doesn’t want to ruin this, but she can’t hide this. Not from her mother. She tilts her head slightly, looking up at the ceiling. “I kind of… sort of… kissed her today?” she says quietly and quickly, fearful of what comes next. 

Betsy stares at her daughter for a long moment. She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. “Tell me about her.”

“What?” Cady stares back at her mother, a confused look on her face. 

“Tell me about Regina.” Betsy opens her eyes again, looking at her daughter. “The only things I know about her are from when you were both in high school. Clearly , stuff has changed. I am trying very hard to… not be…” She waves her free hand. “Tell me about her, Cady. Help me understand how we got here.” 

Cady nods, thinking for just a moment. It all starts to bubble out of her, the excitement and giddiness of having such strong feelings for a person all coming out at once. 

“She’s incredibly sweet,” is how Cady begins, “like, genuinely one of the nicest people I know. Which isn’t like her from high school at all . She’s constantly asking me if things are okay and checking in about any physical contact or anything. When that boy came into the shop and I froze up, she just… jumped in and helped me. Got me out of there. Made sure I was okay, that I had you with me. She’s just been so honest about everything, even the stuff that’s hard to talk about. Like the past.” 

Cady shakes her head. “She texts me every morning when she gets up, tells me she hopes I have a good day. I don’t usually see it until my break, which, if it’s a day she comes to visit me, she gets there just before my break, so I just talk to her then. If not, I text her on my break. Sometimes, if she can, she sets aside time during my break to talk to me. She did that today, actually. She woke up but didn’t get out of bed because it was right before my break and she didn’t want to miss any of it.” Cady smiles softly. “She just… is constantly looking out for me. She made sure we went somewhere with mocktails when we went out, so I wouldn’t be left out, because Karen and Gretchen wanted to drink. And she didn’t drink that night either. She volunteered to stay sober to drive everyone home, which she apparently normally protests being that person. She volunteered . Because she didn’t want to leave me out.” 

“While she’s super kind, she also doesn’t treat me like I’m made of glass. She’s careful about certain topics, obviously, but she doesn’t hide away details of her life. She tells me all about work and all the stuff going on. I feel like I know more than Gretchen and Karen sometimes,” Cady laughs lightly. “And she’s always interested in hearing about stuff that happens at my work too, even though it’s like, night and day from the stuff she does.” 

“She notices things and remembers things. I think I told her maybe once that physical touch grounds me, and any time I start to get overwhelmed by something, she’s right there, taking my hand or touching my arm and trying to ground me. And she’s always asking if it’s okay to touch me,” Cady’s smile grows wider. “She gets flustered sometimes and just starts rambling about things. It’s adorable. She’s just… so genuine with me.” 

“That doesn’t sound like the Regina George I remember at all,” Betsy says, a bit suspicious. 

Cady shrugs. “There are parts of that person that are still there, but they’re never directed at me. She gets road rage at other drivers, but she always apologizes for yelling right after. The way she talks about work sometimes reminds me of how she talked about other people back then, but it’s also… different. She’s blunt about people at work, but she’s not harsh , I guess. Not to her own employees, anyways. She’s a lot harsher with social media stuff. She has a lot of opinions about other influencers she knows, but it’s not about their looks or anything like it was back then. It’s about their personalities and her interactions with them. That Regina George is still there, but she’s different. More grown up.” 

Betsy hums. “I guess that makes sense.” 

Cady squeezes her mom’s hand. “You know, she was just a kid too, back then. Trying to figure out how to deal with loss. Did she make mistakes? Absolutely. She’ll be the first person to admit that. But she’s not an evil or bad person, Mom. What she did isn’t okay, we all know that, and she takes full responsibility for it, but… I don’t hold the actions of teenage Regina against adult Regina. I hope, one day, you won’t either.” 

Betsy looks at her daughter for a long moment. “So, you kissed her.” 

“I did,” Cady nods. “I was telling her about our fight, and some of the stuff I said. When I blurted out my feelings about her last night… It was the first time I’d really admitted it to myself. Then today, I just… I did what felt right. I kissed her. And she kissed me back. Then we talked about it, what it means, all of that. It was good. It was really, really good.”

“What does it mean, exactly?” 

“Well, we’re still going to take things slow,” Cady tells her. “Neither of us wants to mess this up. She's very adamant that she's happy to let me set the pace.” 

Betsy closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay,” Betsy repeats. “I don't… I am trying . I'm still not thrilled about it. But it does sound like she's changed. And it sounds like she cares an awful lot about you, and she makes you happy.” She takes another deep breath. “And that's what matters.” 

Cady grabs her mom, embracing her in a big hug. “I love you, Mom. I wouldn't lie to you about this, about any of this.”

Betsy hugs her back. “I know. I'm sorry I accused you of lying last night. You… You’ve never given me any reason to believe you’re lying to me. I'm sorry.”

“It's okay. I forgive you,” Cady says, releasing her mom from the hug. “You know, and it doesn't have to be right away, but I think it might help if you sat down and had a conversation with her. Maybe dinner or something. Let her show you how she's changed.” 

Betsy looks at her daughter and nods. “I think that's a good idea. It's going to have to wait until after my conference, though.” 

Cady sighs, closing her eyes. “Shoot, that's right. When is that again?” 

“Not this upcoming week, but the week after,” Betsy reminds her. She bites her lip. “It's not too late for me to cancel, you know.”

Cady opens her eyes and shakes her head. “No, absolutely not. I'll be fine.”

“But the timing…”

Cady puts a hand on her mom’s knee. “I will be fine. I was confident I'd be fine months ago, and now I also have Regina if I need her.” 

Betsy tilts her head and nods. “Yeah, I guess you do. I just wish they hadn't changed the dates.”

“Me too,” Cady sighs. “But you're going to go, you're going to have fun, and I'm going to be just fine.” She smiles softly at her mom. “Gotta let me take the risks sometimes, remember?”

“Right,” Betsy smiles back. “Does she know about the conference yet?” 

“Not yet,” Cady shakes her head. “I forgot about it. I'll tell her tomorrow.” 

Betsy nods. “Good. Let me know if for whatever reason, she can't help, okay?” 

“I will, but I highly, highly doubt that'll happen.” Cady lets out a big yawn. “I’m sorry. I didn't get a lot of sleep last night.”

Betsy waves her off. “It's late, you should go to bed.” 

“Feeling better?” Cady asks softly. 

“Much,” Betsy confirms with a small smile. She wraps her daughter up in another hug. “I love you. Even if I’m not always the best at showing it.”

“I love you too, Mom. And I know where you were coming from. I just needed you to listen to what I had to say too.” 

Betsy squeezes, lets go, then nods towards Cady’s bedroom. “Go get some rest.” 

Cady gets up, first heading to the bathroom. Betsy stays on the couch, listening as Cady goes about her nighttime routine. This time, she doesn't listen out of fear. She listens out of comfort. 

When Cady does finally enter her bedroom, she doesn't lock the door. 

Cady collapses into bed, her phone already out. She's got a message from Regina already waiting for her, which brings a smile to her lips. 

Regina - 9:07pm

Made it back home! Let me know how things go with your mom and if you need anything ❤️

Cady - 9:56pm

It went really, really, really well. Better than I could have imagined.

Cady - 9:56pm

She apologized for everything last night and heard me out. It was just a really good talk.

Regina - 9:56pm

I'm so glad!

Cady - 9:57pm

She's also trying very hard not to hate you anymore, so there's that.

Cady - 9:57pm

She had me tell her all the things I liked about you and everything you've done for me lately and finally agreed that you're not the same person anymore.

Regina - 9:58pm

Wow. I mean, I'm glad, but I didn't expect that so quickly.

Regina - 9:58pm

That's also cute as hell and you definitely have to tell me what you said 😊

Cady - 9:59pm

Tomorrow, I'm too tired tonight :(

Cady - 9:59pm

But yeah, I didn't expect it so soon either, but I'm really, really glad she's trying.

Regina - 10:00pm

I didn't realize how late it was. Baby, you should go to sleep. We can talk more in the morning.

Cady - 10:00pm

I'm going to, I just wanted to tell you how it went.

Cady - 10:00pm

Also, are you doing anything tomorrow?

Regina - 10:01pm

I have this fundraiser brunch in the morning for the non-profit we partner with. If I had a plus one, I'd invite you 😞

Cady - 10:01pm

That's okay, I need to sleep in tomorrow anyways. Is your afternoon open?

Regina - 10:02pm

That it is! 😁

Cady - 10:02pm

Would you mind if I came over?

Regina - 10:02pm

I would not mind one bit. 

Regina - 10:03pm

Actually. 

Regina - 10:03pm

How would you feel about going on a proper first date?

Cady - 10:03pm

I would like that a lot :)

Regina - 10:04pm

Great!!! I’ll come up with an idea and tell you what to dress for tomorrow, okay? It won't be fancy or anything, promise.

Cady - 10:04pm

Sounds good to me :)

Regina - 10:04pm

It's a date 😁

Regina - 10:04pm

You should go to bed, baby. I'll talk to you in the morning. 

Cady - 10:05pm

Okay <3 Goodnight!! <3

Regina - 10:05pm

Goodnight! Sweet dreams ❤️

Cady smiles at her phone, staring at the last message for a full minute. She finally locks her phone, plugging it in, and curls up under the covers. She falls asleep thinking about Regina, a warm feeling filling her chest. 

When Cady wakes up the next day, the warm feeling hasn’t left. She dreamt of Regina last night, of her soft smile and gentle lips, of her beautiful face and comforting hugs. The dream had been one of the most pleasant dreams she’s had in a very, very long time.

Cady rolls over in bed, grabbing her phone off her nightstand. She sees the time and a notification already waiting for her.

Regina - 7:30am

Good morning ❤️

Regina - 7:31am

I figured out where we’re going on our date later, but it’s going to be a bit of a surprise, if that’s okay with you. I think you’re gonna really like it!

Regina - 7:31am

Dress code is casual, but comfortable for walking. I’ll pick you up at 2.

Cady - 8:28am

Good morning! <3 

Cady - 8:28am

I’m good with a surprise! I’m excited! :D

Regina - 8:29am

You’re up early! I thought you were sleeping in today?

Cady - 8:29am

This is me sleeping in. I wake up at 4 five days a week to go to work. I don’t know the last time I slept past 9.

Regina - 8:30am

That makes sense. Still, damn. Did you sleep well?

Cady - 8:30am

I did :) I had some really good dreams too.

Regina - 8:30am

About what?

Cady - 8:31am

You <3

Cady - 8:31am

There wasn’t, like, a plot or anything. I just dreamed about you and woke up all warm and happy. 

Regina - 8:32am

That’s literally the cutest thing I’ve ever heard.

Regina - 8:32am

The fact I can’t kiss you right now is criminal.

Cady - 8:32am

Oh, there will be plenty of time for that later today :P

Regina - 8:33am

Oh really? What makes you so sure about that?

Cady - 8:33am

Pretty sure we’re both going to combust if we go too long without kissing each other at this point.

Regina - 8:33am

Okay, got me there 😏

Regina - 8:33am

What’re you up to this morning?

Cady - 8:34am

Not much. Might spend some time with my mom just watching TV or something. We’re behind on a couple of our shows.

Regina - 8:34am

I’m so glad she’s changed her mind, by the way. I know I said that last night too, but still.

Cady - 8:34am

It’s such a relief. Now half the people who have been begging me not to talk to you have been convinced. 

Cady - 8:34am

All that’s left is Thalia and Janis.

Cady - 8:34am

Thalia is my therapist by the way. I think I’ve mentioned that before? I’m not sure.

Regina - 8:35am

I think you did at some point. 

Regina - 8:35am

Obviously I want you to be able to still have a relationship with your friend, but I don’t know that Janis is ever going to come around after she finds out we’re dating? I know we haven’t called it anything specific yet but that’s the best word I can figure.

Cady - 8:36am

Yes, you dork. We’re dating. :P

Cady - 8:36am

I would hope she’d be able to be mature enough to move past it but we’ll see, I guess.

Regina - 8:37am

I don’t know how much she and Damian told you about what happened in middle school, but she’s got every right to be furious with me. I know it was a long, long time ago, but, well, from what you’ve told me, she hasn’t really moved on from it.

Regina - 8:37am

I’m afraid this will just add more fuel to the fire.

Regina - 8:37am

Not saying you shouldn’t try, just saying you should be prepared that it might not go well.

Cady - 8:38am

I know that you outed her and stuff, and the whole thing with the stuffed animal and the Bunsen burner, but it was, like, years ago when they told me. Like, before Aaron died. I might be misremembering some stuff. 

Regina - 8:38am

Do you remember if she told you why I did all of that?

Cady - 8:39am

Something about a game of spin the bottle I think? It’s a little fuzzy.

Regina - 8:39am

Yes and no. That was part of it. We kissed at that party and I realized I liked it way more than I liked kissing boys. And I lashed out instead of being able to confront that, like I did again in high school. 

Regina - 8:40am

I made the mistake of telling her later that I thought I liked her. She was super mad at me, obviously. Then I started carrying around that stupid stuffed animal and well, you know the rest. 

Regina - 8:40am

So news that I’ve finally been able to accept my sexuality and have started dating you… well, it might set her off. 

Cady - 8:41am

Jesus, yeah, that’s a lot more than they explained back in the day.

Cady - 8:41am

Maybe I’ll give Damian a heads up before I try Janis.

Regina - 8:41am

Probably a good idea.

Regina - 8:42am

I have to start driving to this brunch, but I’ll talk to you later, okay?

Cady - 8:42am

Okay! Drive safe! Have fun!! <3

Regina - 8:42am

❤️

Cady backs out of the conversation in the texting app, hovering her finger over the last message she got from Damian. She hesitates, thinking about what Regina had just told her.

Regina had liked Janis back in middle school and sent her into her first gay panic. Regina had a pattern of lashing out at girls she liked because she couldn’t handle the fact that she liked them. Despite all the evidence that Regina has changed over the years, this knowledge makes Cady’s stomach twist and turn. 

She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. Regina has changed. The fact she’s even willing to admit the full truth to Cady is evidence of that, let alone everything else. She opens her eyes, clicking her messages with Damian.

Cady - 8:45am

Hey! Are you around for a quick call? Only if Janis isn’t around right now, though.

Damian - 8:47am

Hey girl! Yeah, it’s just me and Matt at home right now. Call me whenever!

Cady presses the call button at the top of the screen, bringing the phone up to her ear.

“Hey, Damian,” Cady says as soon as he answers the call.

“Hey, girlie!” She can almost hear the grin on his face. “What’s up?”

“Well, I have a couple of updates for you,” Cady tells him.

“Updates? About Regina?”

“Yes, actually.” Cady takes a deep breath. “So, we’re kind of dating now?”

Damian honest-to-god shrieks . Cady has to pull the phone a couple inches away, laughing and waiting for his excitement to subside.

“Tell me everything ,” Damian says, and so Cady does. She launches into the story of the last few days: Girls’ Night, the fight with her mom, the leaked photo, the talk at Regina’s, kissing Regina (with a lot more detail than she gave her mother), the talk with her mom last night, and the date they were going on later today. Damian peppers the story with little comments about how cute things were, or relief that Cady’s mother is trying to let go of the grudge she holds against Regina. 

“So, yeah,” Cady finishes. “All of that happened.” 

“I am so happy for you both,” Damian says. “It sounds like you figured things out a lot faster than you thought you would.”

Cady shrugs. “I kinda blurted out my feelings for Regina to my mom when we had our fight. It was the first time I acknowledged them to myself, even. So I just… did what felt right.” 

“That’s adorable and extremely gay,” Damian laughs. “Any idea where she’s taking you today?”

“Nope,” Cady tells him. “Complete surprise. I’ve been told to dress casual, but comfortable for walking.” 

Damian hums. “Could be anything, then. You’ll have to update me later.”

“I will,” Cady laughs. “There’s something else I wanted to talk to you about, though.”

“What’s up?”

“I’m going to try to reach out to Janis,” Cady says. “I don’t know if it’ll go well, but I don’t want to hide this from her, or for her to find out about Regina and I from someone else. I wanted to give you a heads up, just in case.”

Damian sighs. “You’re right, it’s best she hears it from you, but goddamn , do I not want to do this.”

“Me neither.” Cady pauses for a moment. “How’s she been?”

“Less blind rage, more seething contempt,” Damian explains. “She’s made a lot of angry artwork lately.”

“That tracks. Do you know if she’s doing anything this morning? I was going to try and reach out after this call, but if you know she’s busy…”

“Nope, last I heard, she’s just working in her studio today,” Damian tells her. “So you should be good to call.” 

“Alright. I’ll text her after we hang up.”

“After you talk to her, shoot me a text and let me know how it went, and if I need to go do some damage control.”

“Will do,” Cady replies.

“Good luck, Cady.”

“Thanks, I’ll need it.”

The pair exchange their goodbyes, and Cady hangs up the call. She navigates over to her text messages with Janis. The two of them haven’t exchanged a private text in months , as both Janis and Damian primarily talked to Cady through their group chat. Still, it wasn’t like Cady had to dig deep into her messages to get to them. Janis was still on the first page of conversations. It wasn’t like Cady texted many people. 

Cady - 9:05am

Hey Janis, I hope you’re doing alright. I wanted to reach out and see if you’d be down for a phone call? Let me know!

Cady closes the app, not expecting a response right away. She rolls over in bed, debating whether or not she should start her morning routine, or if she should just say in bed a bit longer and watch some videos on YouTube. 

A different notification pops up on her screen.

Regina - 9:07am

If there’s one thing I did not miss about Chicago, it’s the goddamn wind.

Regina - 9:07am

Regina - 9:07am

I spent so much time doing my hair this morning and for what???

A huge smile stretches across Cady’s face at the picture. She rapidly types a response.

Cady - 9:08am

Number one, you’re so cute, holy cow.

Cady - 9:08am

Number two, your hair always looks good. 

Cady - 9:08am

Number three, the wind is my mortal enemy, so I’m with you there. I can’t tell you the amount of times I’ve gotten nearly blown into the street walking to work.

Regina - 9:09am

That is moderately concerning.

Regina - 9:09am

Thank you, though. 😊

Just then, an incoming call appears at the top of her screen.

Cady - 9:09am

Janis calling, ttyl

Cady presses accept on the call, and brings the phone up to her ear. 

“Hey. Jan,” Cady answers. 

“Hello,” Janis replies coldly. “You wanted to talk?”

“I did,” Cady sighs. “I understand you’re angry, but I was hoping you’d be willing to hear me out.”

“You’re not going to convince me to like Regina George, Caddy.” 

“I’m not trying to,” Cady replies. “I just don’t want there to be this whole thing between us because of it.” 

“Pretty sure there already is,” Janis retorts. 

Cady sighs. “I… Janis, we’re dating. Regina and I are dating.” 

Janis is silent for a long moment. “How long?”

“Yesterday.”

“ Really ?” 

“Really,” Cady repeats. “We kissed for the first time yesterday.” 

“Caddy… what are you doing ?” 

“She’s not the same person she was, Janis,” Cady tells her. “Not by a longshot. And I know she did a lot of horrible things in the past. So does she. She told me earlier today about the other part of what happened in middle school.” 

Janis is quiet again. “And?”

“And she feels really bad about it,” Cady says. “She told me she’s wanted to try to reach out and apologize a few times over the years, but you have her blocked everywhere. She figured it was just best to let you be.”

“I have no interest in a fake apology, and frankly, neither should you.”

“None of us are the same people we were in high school, Jan. Not you, not me, not Damian, and not Regina. Even Gretchen and Karen are all grown up too. I’m not saying you have to forgive her. I just want you to consider that maybe people can change.” 

“Does your mother know about this?” Janis asks.

“She does,” Cady tells her. “She asked me to tell her about Regina, so I did. I told her all of the reasons I know she’s changed and the reasons I like her. She’s agreed to try to move past it.”

“That’s… not what I expected,” Janis admits. “I was pretty sure your mother might be the only person in the world who could beat me in a hating-Regina-George contest.” 

Cady shakes her head and sighs. “Until last night, maybe. We had a huge fight the other day about it. It’s what led to all of this.” 

“I just don’t understand why you trust her, Caddy,” Janis says. “She’s Regina George. She’s a scum sucking life ruiner. You know this.”

“Maybe she used to be, but she isn’t anymore. Every single thing Regina’s done for me these last few weeks has been nothing short of incredibly kind and caring.”

“Those words do not belong in the same sentence as Regina’s name,” Janis snaps back.

Cady sighs. This is harder than she thought it would be. She pauses for a moment, remembering how her mother had changed her tune last night. She bites the bullet and launches into rambling about Regina again, and everything that’s happened between them these last few weeks. She ignores every single one of Janis’s angry quips back, trying to stay on track. Eventually, Janis stops making comments, and just listens as Cady tells her about all the sweet and kind things Regina does, and the ways she makes Cady happy.

When Cady is done, Janis sighs. 

“Goddammit, Caddy,” she says. “She really makes you happy, doesn’t she?”

“She does,” Cady replies. “I’m not saying you have to like her. I’m not saying you have to forgive her. But I… I don’t want you to hate me for being with her. She’s not the same person. And you don’t ever have to talk to her if you don’t want to. I just don’t want to lose you as a friend because of this.” 

“I don’t hate you, Caddy,” Janis tells her. “I may not understand it, but it’s not you I’m angry with. I’m angry with her. I probably always will be angry with her. But I can… try to tone it down, when I’m talking to you.” 

“I would appreciate that a lot,” Cady says with a small smile. “You know, Damian and I talked the other day. He got me all caught up on him and Matt.”

“He told me,” Janis confirms. “I’m sorry we haven’t been honest with you, Caddy. I know Damian already did the whole spiel, but I am sorry about that too.”

“It’s okay, as long as you actually tell me things about your life,” Cady laughs lightly. “Any budding relationships for you? Or secret year-long ones?”

Janis laughs back, and Cady is so relieved that she’s actually laughing, and not just angry. “Not at the moment, no. There was a girl about six months ago, but it didn’t work out.” 

“That’s a bummer, I’m sorry.” 

“Eh, it’s fine. I broke things off with her. I’ve been meaning to get back into the dating scene, but… I don’t know. Just been focused on my art for now, I guess.” 

“Well, whenever you do, you gotta keep me updated, okay?” 

“I will, Caddy, I promise. Listen, I have to go, but we’ll talk again soon, okay?”

“Sounds good. Take care, Janis.”

“You too, Caddy. And make sure Regina knows that if she hurts you again, I will end her.” 

Cady laughs lightly. “That’s as good as it’s gonna get, isn’t it?”

“For now,” Janis replies. “I mean it, though.”

“I’ll let her know,” Cady says. “Talk to you soon, Jan.”

“Bye, Caddy.”

Cady hangs up the call and immediately opens her texts with Regina. There’s a message waiting for her. 

Regina - 9:10am

Hope it goes well! I’m almost at brunch so I might not respond right away when you’re back.

Cady - 9:36am

That went a lot better than I expected. She’s still mad, but she’s not full of hatred anymore, I guess? I don’t know. It’s hard to tell with her. 

Cady - 9:37am

I did basically the same thing I did with my mom and just told her everything sweet you’ve ever done to show her you’ve changed. She was a lot less angry by the end of the call, and promised we weren’t gonna stop being friends or anything. So that’s good, I think.

Cady - 9:38am
She did demand I tell you that if you hurt me again, she’d end you, but that’s a step up from just straight up threatening physical violence in the present, I guess.

Cady backs out of her conversation with Regina, sending a quick text to Damian letting him know the talk went well, and Janis seems to be in a better mood. He shoots back with a heart and a thumbs up, but their conversation ends there.

Cady gets out of bed, starting to get ready with her morning routine. She still has several hours before she needs to get ready for her date, but she decides to take her time this morning. She greets her mother, who is out in the living room, sipping on coffee and doing something on her laptop, before heading into the bathroom for a long shower. 

It’s a while before she gets a response from Regina, but it does finally come as Cady is back in her bedroom, trying to decide what to wear on their date.

Regina - 11:02am

Sorry, that was way more involved than I thought. I’ve still got another hour of this, but I’ve finally got a moment. 

Regina - 11:02am

I’m glad it went well, and I can’t say I’m surprised about the threat. Not that it’s going to be an issue, so she doesn’t have to worry about it. Doubt she’ll believe that, though.

Cady - 11:03am

I doubt it either. Still, I’ll take it.

Regina - 11:03am

Three down, one to go. How does one go about winning over someone’s therapist?

Cady - 11:04am

:P Leave that to me. 

Cady - 11:04am

Are you having fun at your brunch?

Regina - 11:04am

Eh, these things aren’t typically the most fun thing in the world. It’s a fundraiser for this non-profit my company supports. So everyone’s just trying to schmooze and get me to write bigger checks.

Regina - 11:05am

I’ve been to a lot of these types of things in New York before, but I don’t know. This one’s different. I can’t quite put my finger on it, but something feels off.

Regina - 11:05am

They seem to be a bit more aggressive in the ways they ask for money, I think. It’s not as tactful as it was in New York. Don’t know if that’s just this particular non-profit or not, though.

Cady - 11:05am

Which non-profit is it?

Regina - 11:06am

Chicago Future Fashion. It’s a non-profit that helps inner city kids that are interested in fashion. 

Regina - 11:06am

There was a similar one in New York that I really liked, so when we moved here and had to pick a non-profit for philanthropic stuff, I went with this one.

Regina - 11:06am

I went to one of their other events a few months ago and I felt like it was weird, but I thought it was just because I still wasn’t used to being here yet.

Regina - 11:06am

I don’t know how else to describe it. Just a weird vibe.

Cady - 11:07am

Weird. Can’t say I know much about the arts based non-profits, but if you’re ever looking for a new one, I’ve got a whole list of ones that helped me. 

Regina - 11:07am

I will keep that in mind.

Regina - 11:07am

Ah, I gotta go. They’re about to do another speech. I’ll text you when I’m done.

Cady - 11:07am

Good luck! <3

Regina - 11:07am

❤️

Cady puts her phone away and sighs, looking at her closet again. Casual, yet comfortable to walk in, yet nice enough for Cady to feel happy about going on a date with Regina wearing it. 

This was going to be a challenge. 

Chapter Text

Cady spends the rest of her morning and the early afternoon getting ready for her date. She’s already showered, but she spends a long time picking out her outfit and doing her hair and makeup. She goes back and forth with it several times, but in the end, settles on an outfit she thinks Regina will think is cute , yet still her own style. 

She’s realized she’s run out of her contacts, which she should have noticed at least a few days ago, but she’s been a little preoccupied. Her meds are running low too. She decides she should make a trip to the pharmacy before her date today, so she doesn’t forget. 

She tells her mom about the contacts, who says she’ll order more. She asks if Betsy needs anything while she’s at the pharmacy, and her mother gives her a small list. 

Cady heads out, taking a small messenger bag with her as opposed to her work backpack. While waiting for the elevator, she spots herself in the mirror in the hallway. She looks good . She thinks about that adorable selfie Regina sent her earlier, and decides to return the favor. 

Cady - 1:03pm

Cady - 1:03pm

Think this’ll work for our date? :P

She smirks to herself as she gets on the elevator. By the time the doors close, she’s already got a response.

Regina - 1:04pm

HELLO??????????

Regina - 1:04pm

What the hell, Cady. You’re gonna kill me.

Regina - 1:04pm

The outfit? The pigtails? The glasses?

Regina - 1:04pm

You wear glasses???

Regina - 1:04pm

You’ve killed me. I’m dying. I’ve died.

Cady - 1:05pm

Still a drama queen, I see :P

Cady - 1:05pm

I wear contacts most of the time but I ran out. Lost track of how long it’s been since I last ordered them. These are just backups.

Regina - 1:05pm

You should wear them more often. They look so good on you.

Regina - 1:05pm

The pigtails??? You’re so cute, Cady. What the hell.

Cady - 1:06pm

:) Thank you

Cady - 1:06pm

And now you can see what it was like to get that picture from you earlier.

Regina - 1:07pm

What??? These aren’t even comparable. You’re all dolled up looking cute as hell and I literally had my hair flying off my head.

Cady - 1:07pm

And the cutest little grumpy look on your face.

Regina - 1:08pm

I literally haven’t stopped staring at my phone since you sent that.

Regina - 1:08pm

You totally distracted me from getting ready!

Cady - 1:08pm

Oops! :)

Cady - 1:08pm

I’ll let you go get ready, I’m headed to the pharmacy to pick up my meds. I’ll see you at 2! :) <3

Regina - 1:09pm

I made that picture your new contact photo but I am demanding to take some of us together later because oh my god you’re so cute I want to immortalize it forever.

Regina - 1:09pm

See you at 2 cutie! ❤️ 😊

Regina stared down at her phone, stunned. Cady Heron had always been really pretty. She’d also always struggled a little bit when it came to fashion. But everything about that picture made Regina want to scream . She was so goddamn cute, Regina’s brain couldn’t handle it.

They were going on a date , she had to remind herself. In less than an hour, she’d have that adorable little redhead in her car, taking her on the first date of many. That, she was certain of. 

She puts her phone back down and looks at herself in the mirror. It’s time to focus .

Like clockwork, Regina arrives at Cady’s apartment at 2pm on the dot. Cady is already downstairs waiting, looking just like she did in the selfie, but without the messenger bag. She slips into the passenger seat of Regina’s car, and takes Regina in. 

She's gorgeous , as always. Her outfit is definitely on the casual side, but everything is still designer. It makes sense. Regina George wouldn't be caught out in public in anything short of a stunning outfit. 

Her sunglasses are perched atop her head, allowing Cady a good look at her immaculate makeup. Cady is stunned for several seconds at how absolutely gorgeous she is. 

Regina smiles at the dumbfounded look on Cady’s face. She leans across the console, meeting Cady’s lips in a gentle kiss. It's enough to bring Cady back to Earth, who closes her eyes and kisses back, a smile on her face. 

“Hi,” Cady says softly when they pull apart. 

“Hi, cutie,” Regina replies with a smile. “You look so adorable. I can't handle it.”

“You're literally so gorgeous, I think my brain is short circuiting.”

Regina laughs. “God, we're hopeless, aren't we?” 

Cady giggles. “We totally are.”

“As much as I'd love to sit here and compliment you and kiss you all afternoon, we do actually have a schedule to keep,” Regina says, pulling out of the spot in front of the apartment building that she’d briefly paused in. 

“Do I get to know where we’re going yet?” Cady asks. 

“Nope, not yet,” Regina replies. Her eyes flash to her phone, which is mounted on the dashboard, maps app open. “And no looking up the address that's on there. That's cheating.”

Cady holds up her hands in surrender. “I wasn't gonna.”

“Good,” Regina smirks. “Did you eat lunch yet?” 

“My mom made a big breakfast, and we had it kinda late,” Cady tells her. “Pancakes and eggs and bacon. And I ate a little bit more than I usually would, because I knew you were gonna ask.”

“That's my girl,” Regina smiles, and Cady feels warmth filling her chest. “We’ve got dinner plans later, but I was fully prepared to get you some lunch if you hadn't eaten.” 

“How'd the rest of your brunch go?” Cady asks, a little desperate to get off the topic. She kows Regina is coming from a very good place, and she doesn't mind the reminders, but she really doesn't want to talk about food forever. 

“It was still really weird ,” Regina frowns. “I still don't know what it is about that place. I think it's the executive director. He gives me weird vibes.” 

“What about him is weird?” 

Regina hesitates for a moment. “He's just, like, a sleazeball. He reminds me too much of a used car salesman, I think. Like, a really bad one. Except instead of trying to sell someone a lemon, he's trying to guilt trip you into giving way more money than you planned to for the kids.” Regina shakes her head. “I get it. A fundraiser is a fundraiser. You always wanna try to get as much as you can. But something about that man is off .”

“Maybe it wouldn't hurt to look into some of the other non-profits anyways,” Cady suggests. 

Regina shakes her head and sighs. “Maybe, but it’s a whole process, since it's not just me involved. It's my company. I have to get approval from senior leadership to add a non-profit to our philanthropy efforts, and if I wanted to remove that one, I'd have to get permission for that too. There's a lot of stuff I have final say over, but unfortunately, this isn't one of them.” 

“Dang. That's a lot more complicated than I thought.” 

“These things tend to be overly complicated, but that's neither here nor there. How was the rest of your morning?”

“Good!” Cady says with a smile. “It was nice to take my time getting ready and stuff, and the walk to the pharmacy was lovely. It's so beautiful out today.”

“It is,” Regina replies with a smile of her own. “How far is your pharmacy?”

“A couple of blocks,” Cady shrugs. “I like to go myself when the weather is warm enough. Gives me a chance to go to another part of my neighborhood, aside from work.” 

Regina nods. “I get that. I still haven't explored too much of the area. I planned to try out different coffee shops and stuff when I moved here, but…” She steals a glance at Cady. “Only one of them has you, so…”

Cady blushes. “You're such a big softie.”

“Only for you,” Regina replies immediately. 

Cady can't wipe the giant grin off her face. “My point still stands.” 

As if on cue, someone cuts Regina off in traffic. She lays on the horn. “Oh, come on!” she yells. “Fuck you!” 

Cady just laughs at the road rage. “Yeah, definitely only for me.” 

Regina grins sheepishly. “Sorry. I shouldn't yell.” 

Cady waves it off. “Honestly? The road rage doesn't scare me anymore.”

“ Anymore ?”

“G, can you imagine why maybe yelling, especially you yelling, puts me on edge?” Cady gives her a look. “Maybe a certain bench incident?” 

Regina winces. “Oh, fuck. I somehow completely forgot about that.” Her face falls, and she steals a nervous glance at Cady before putting her eyes back on the road. “I didn't hurt you that day, did I? Like, physically, I mean. Obviously I hurt you other ways, I just mean… I'm gonna stop talking now.”

Cady shakes her head. “No, I was physically fine. Just a bruise from where I fell, I think. I don't really remember all the details. It's kinda hazy.” She takes a deep breath. “Speaking of this stuff, and I only say this now, because I want to keep the rest of the date light, my birthday is coming up soon.”

Regina stiffens lightly. “That it is. A couple of weeks, right?”

“Right,” Cady nods. “Not next week, but the week after.” 

“You mentioned the other day that you tend to have episodes around your birthday,” Regina comments. “I assume that's what this is about?”

“Yes and no,” Cady tells her. “It's a bit more complicated than that this year.”

“What do you mean?”

Cady takes a deep breath. “Okay, so, every year, my mom goes to this conference in July for biology and zoology,” she begins. “It's like, a huge deal in her field. It lasts a full week. Some years I've gone with her, especially early on in my recovery, but other years, like more recently, I've stayed home alone. This year, she's being featured on a keynote panel on women in the field, and it's like, a very big deal. This year, they also changed the dates.”

Regina’s heart sinks. “Let me guess. It's on your birthday?” 

“Close,” Cady replies. “It's next week. So the week before my birthday. Which is usually when the episode starts.” 

“Shit,” Regina mutters. 

“Yeah. So, my mom wanted to bail like, months ago, as soon as she found out the new dates, but I convinced her not to. I convinced her I'd be fine and I needed to try to do this on my own anyways. I already have extra therapy sessions booked and there's been all kinds of planning going into this. I'll admit, with everything that's happened in the last couple of weeks, I completely forgot it was coming up.” 

“Well, I will certainly be here if you need literally anything at all.”

“I know,” Cady smiles gently. “I just needed to make sure I actually told you it was happening.” 

“Got it,” Regina nods. “When does she leave?” 

“A week from today, Sunday afternoon,” Cady tells her. “And she gets back the following Sunday.” 

“And remind me, what day is your birthday again?” 

“The Wednesday after she gets back.” 

Regina nods again. “Okay, got it. I'll take that day off work.”

“You don't have to-.”

“Cady,” Regina cuts her off, “I know I don't have to, but I want to. And I'll do whatever you want that day, even if it's literally just laying in bed and cuddling. But I'm going to be there, okay?” 

Cady nods sheepishly. “Okay. That'll be nice, I think.” 

Regina reaches one hand over, taking one of Cady's hands. “You're not doing this alone anymore, baby. And, I know you've had your mom and stuff, obviously. But now I'm here too. And we’ll get through the episodes together, okay?” 

“Okay.” Cady gently squeezes Regina’s hand, who squeezes back. 

Regina doesn't let go of Cady's hand the rest of the drive. They make some more small talk, steering clear of topics like the past or birthdays. Regina is trying her very best to stay in the present, to not ruminate on things like birthdays and benches and bruises.

God, did she really bruise Cady? She hates 16 year old Regina. She wishes she could go back and shake some sense into her. Maybe punch her. Yeah, Regina would punch her 16 year old self. What an absolute idiot . A selfish, selfish idiot. 

Regina takes a sharp breath, trying to refocus herself on the present. She's felt guilty about her past self for years . Being all moody about it on her first date with Cady isn't going to do anything but make it miserable for the both of them. 

Cady forgives you , she reminds herself. You should forgive yourself too . 

Maybe one day, but definitely not today. 

When they get closer to their destination, Cady’s eyes are trained out the window, trying to figure it out. She's guessed no more than four different restaurants she’s seen, a movie theater, and even just the park they're driving past. Regina smiles and just says “Nope!” to every single guess. 

Suddenly, Cady’s eyes land on a sign indicating what they were driving towards. “The aquarium?” Cady asks, some shock in her voice. 

“You finally got it,” Regina replies with a little laugh. 

Cady’s face lights up. “Wait, really?” When Regina nods, Cady adds, “I love the aquarium!” 

A huge grin spreads across Regina’s face. “I know. It was either between this or the zoo, but I managed to get us tickets to something special here. That's an extra secret though.” 

“Oh, is it one of their sea lion shows?” Cady asks, bouncing up and down slightly in her seat. 

“I'm not answering that,” Regina tells her. “You'll see when it's time!” 

Cady huffs, crossing her arms, but she can't stop smiling. 

Regina just chuckles at the other girl as they approach the parking lot. “Don’t pout. It’ll be worth the wait.”

“I'm not pouting,” Cady retorts. 

“ Sure ,” Regina teases as they pull into a parking spot. It's relatively empty, for a Sunday afternoon. Regina supposes she doesn't know much about aquarium attendance rates, so maybe this is typical for this time. 

When they get out of the car, Cady’s practically vibrating with excitement. 

“Oh my gosh,” she says, “This is gonna be so much fun !”

Regina smiles. “I knew you’d like it.” She takes Cady's hand, rubbing circles on the back of it with her thumb. “Come on, baby. Let's go in.”

Cady blushes and honestly giggles with excitement. Regina just about dies at the sound. She would move heaven and hell just to hear Cady make that sound again, and to know that she was the one to make her do it. 

Regina leads Cady into the aquarium, a big dopey grin on her face. She brings them over to the admissions counter, and shows her reservation number. 

“Don't spoil the surprise out loud,” Regina tells the employee. “She doesn't know exactly what we’re doing today.” She jerks her head towards Cady, who’s still standing at Regina’s side, grinning from ear to ear. 

The aquarium employee smiles. “You got it. Your reservation is for 4:30, but please head over to the designated area by 4:15. It's on the first floor of the main building, near the exhibit.” The employee slides two pamphlets under the glass.

Regina flashes one of her million-dollar smiles. “Thanks!” She takes the pamphlets, giving them a quick glance. Maps. She hands one to Cady, before leading her into the entrance. 

“ Reservation ?” Cady asks, raising an eyebrow as she scans the map. 

“I think he was just being vague to keep it a secret,” Regina tells her. “I’ll keep us on schedule. What do you want to see first?” 

The pair enter through the main doors, and Cady needs a second to take it all in. There's an absolutely massive fish tank, several stories tall, in the center of the main lobby. There's a long spiral ramp going up all the way around it, with various signs for other exhibits scattered about. 

“ Woah ,” Cady murmurs. “That's so cool !”

“Have you not been here before?” Regina asks. 

Cady shakes her head. “No, only the zoo. Not the aquarium.” She grins up at the giant tank. “ Definitely want to start with that!” 

Regina smiles as Cady leads her over to the start of the ramp. She's feeling very proud of herself. She’s definitely surprised that Cady hasn't been here before, but then again, when would she have come? Regina hasn't been to this aquarium since she was a child, on a school field trip. She can say the same about the zoo, which Cady apparently has been to in the last ten years. 

It makes sense. Cady loves animals. She always has. Going to the zoo is likely to bring her a sense of nostalgia for her childhood in Kenya. Of course she would have gone at some point, especially given her mother’s work. She was certain the zoologist had done regular work with the local zoo. 

Regina keeps her hand linked with Cady’s, a strong and firm grip keeping the other girl from running off. Cady gets as close to the glass as she can (which, admittedly, is still several feet away, with the way the ramp wraps around the giant tank), pointing out different colorful fish. Regina gets her to slow down a bit, head up the ramp more slowly, by pointing out different fish to her as well. 

When they reach the second floor, there's a big sign for a sea otter exhibit. Cady is too distracted by the tank to notice it, but Regina points it out. Cady actually squeals with excitement and drags Regina towards it, and Regina thinks she might actually die from how cute Cady is. 

Cady is absolutely losing her mind over how cute the sea otters are. One of them dives under water and comes back up with a tiny rock, before rolling onto its back on the surface of the water and polishing it in its hands. Cady starts basically vibrating with excitement, and Regina releases her hand momentarily to wrap an arm around her shoulders instead. 

“Oh my God !” Cady squeals as a second otter swims up to the first, before turning on its side and taking the first otter’s hand. “They're so cute !” 

Regina looks directly at Cady. “They sure are.”

Slowly, the pair continue to make their way through the aquarium. They head up the ramp, pointing out colorful and interesting fish to each other in the giant tank, and occasionally head to some of the other exhibits on each floor. Cady doesn't stop smiling the entire time, and Regina finds it contagious.

A little after 4:00, Regina leads Cady back down the ramp, towards the “designated area”. They've seen almost everything at this point, so Cady's pretty confused as to what she could possibly be missing. 

Regina keeps her distracted on the first floor by staying by the massive tank until just before 4:15. Then, right on time, Regina follows a sign down a hallway, leading a still confused Cady by the hand. 

At last, Cady sees the sign outside a door. 

Penguin Encounters Lobby

“Oh. My. God,” Cady gasps. She looks at Regina. “You didn't .”

Regina grins. “I did.” 

Cady crashes into Regina, wrapping her up in a huge hug. “Oh my God ! This is so awesome! Thank you, thank you, thank you!”

Regina laughs, returning the hug. “You're very welcome, baby. Come on, let's go inside. We’ve got 4:30.” 

Cady sits in the room, vibrating with excitement in her seat. Regina wraps an arm around her shoulders, unable to stop smiling at Cady. They're the only guests here, which Cady finds a little odd. There's definitely enough seats on the bench that wraps around the entire room for way more than just the two of them. 

They’ve just listened to a whole speech by one of the caretakers about the penguins at the aquarium. Cady, being the animal lover she is, has about a hundred questions for him. The caretaker seems genuinely thrilled that Cady is so interested in learning more about them. Regina just sits there, watching Cady gush about animals and absorbing every piece of information the caretaker tells her about the penguins. 

The caretaker heads into a back room, and a few minutes later, two penguins come waddling out with him. 

Cady immediately makes the cutest noise Regina’s ever heard. Regina squeezes Cady’s shoulders gently, hoping to relax her a bit from the overwhelming excited energy she’s exuding. 

The two penguins, who the caretaker introduces as Skipper and Walter, wander around the room, playing with toys and exploring the space. Walter walks right up to the pair, looking up at Cady, who's just about ready to explode with excitement. 

“Would you like to pet him?” the caretaker asks. 

“Oh my God, yes !” Cady squeals. 

The caretaker laughs, kneeling down next to Walter. He holds Walter lightly, so his back is facing Cady. 

“Only pet downwards,” he tells her. “So it doesn't mess up his feathers.”

Cady reaches down, stroking Walter’s back ever so gently. Her eyes go wide at the touch. “ Woah . They're so thick.” 

“His feathers are very dense,” the caretaker agrees. “It helps them to glide through the water when they swim.” 

“That's so cool.” Cady is in genuine awe as she keeps stroking the penguin. 

The caretaker looks at Regina. “Would you like to pet him?”

“I’d love to,” Regina says, removing her arm from Cady’s shoulders and leaning forward a bit. Cady puts her hands back in her lap, grinning from ear to ear as Regina reaches down and pets the penguin. She gasps at the feeling of the thick, slick feathers beneath her fingers. “ Wow .” 

“You wouldn't expect them to feel like that, right?” the caretaker asks. 

“Definitely not,” Regina agrees. 

Cady is grinning ear to ear. “There's so many animals that feel way different than you'd expect. Like, giraffe fur feels like hair , not fur. It's a weird sensation.”

The caretaker blinks at Cady. “You’ve touched a giraffe?” 

Cady nods sheepishly. “My mom is a research zoologist. I spent basically my whole childhood in Kenya, surrounded by animals.” 

“ Woah ,” the caretaker says. “That's awesome.” Walter gets a little impatient, so the caretaker lets him go. Regina wraps her arm back around Cady's shoulders, a big smile on her face. “Is this your first time with penguins?” 

Cady nods again, more confident this time. “I had no idea we were doing this today.” She looks at Regina, a smile so big on her face, her eyes crinkle. “She surprised me with this.” 

“That I did,” Regina smirks. “Think I'm getting a second date?” 

The caretaker almost looks horrified for a second, but Cady laughs, playfully hitting Regina’s arm. “You dork. Duh .” 

Skipper wanders over, looking expectantly at the caretaker. He looks down at the penguin and smiles. “They know it's snack time. Would you ladies like to give them some fish?”

“ Yes ,” Cady answers immediately, on the edge of her seat again. The caretaker hands them each a couple of fish, and Walter and Skipper waddle right over to them. 

The caretaker shows them exactly where to hold the fish, and Cady feeds one to each penguin. She's so thrilled, grinning and shimmying in her seat. She looks over at Regina, who looks visibly uncomfortable with the raw fish in her hands. “You sure they won't bite?”

“You've got this,” Cady encourages her. “They're used to being fed by people all the time!” 

“She’s right,” the caretaker nods. “We’ve been feeding these guys since they were babies. They only grab the heads, you just have to dangle by the tails.” 

Regina carefully dangles a fish in each hand, lowering them so the penguins can get them. They snatch the fish away from Regina, who flinches slightly and immediately drops the fish into their mouths. 

“You did it!” Cady exclaims, wrapping an arm around Regina's middle. 

Regina smiles, a little pained. “I think I prefer to keep my fingers away from animal mouths.” 

The caretaker laughs, handing them a small bottle of hand sanitizer. Regina takes some immediately, before handing it to Cady. “These guys are definitely some of our more gentle penguins. We’ve got quite a few who aren't allowed to do the penguin encounters because they try to bite fingers.” 

“Well, I'm glad we got the gentle ones,” Regina remarks. 

“Skipper and Walter are two of my favorites,” the caretaker tells them. “They're actually one of our mated pairs here.”

Cady's eyes light up. “I didn't know Chicago had gay penguins!” 

Regina blinks. “...gay penguins?” 

The caretaker laughs, petting Skipper’s back. “Penguins have been known to create long term mating bonds, in some cases, for life, regardless of sex, in both the wild and in captivity. We’re hoping to be able to provide Walter and Skipper with an egg to raise within the next few years.” 

“Oh my gosh, we’re gonna have to come back!” Cady tells Regina excitedly. “We have to check in on the gay penguin dads!”

Regina smiles, wrapping her arm around Cady’s shoulders again. She's absolutely delighted at the fact that Cady is immediately convinced that they're going to be together long enough to watch these apparently gay penguins become parents. “You got it, baby.” 

They spend a bit longer in the penguin encounter, taking pictures with the penguins and getting to pet them a bit more. Regina has to take some alone, as she reveals to Cady that part of the way she got them this private encounter was by flexing her influencer muscles a bit. 

“I still paid for the private session and all,” Regina admits to her as they’re leaving the room, the penguins already being brought back to the main exhibit. “But the fact I was able to book it on such short notice was because I offered to post about it and encourage people to donate.” 

“G, how much did a private penguin encounter cost?”

“I plead the fifth.”

“ Regina ! You're not allowed to spend so much money on me!”

Regina stops Cady in her tracks, tucking them to the side of the mostly deserted hallway. “And why not, baby? I have the money,” she plays with the end of one of Cady’s pigtails, “and you're very special to me. I want you to feel special.” 

“I do feel special,” Cady tells her, blushing lightly. “But I also don't want you spending a ton of money on me!”

“Why not?”

Cady glances down. “Because I can't do the same for you.”

“Baby,” Regina says softly, cupping Cady’s cheek, tilting her head up so they're making eye contact again, “I don't ever expect anything like that. Ever . I like being able to spoil you, and I have the means to. Your face today when you were petting that penguin? It was worth every penny. Getting to see you that excited is worth more to me than any gift.” 

Cady blushes bright red. “I…” 

“I'm going to keep spoiling you,” Regina tells her, “but it's because I want to, okay? Not because I think either of us has to spoil the other.”

“I'm still gonna tell you not to,” Cady huffs. 

“And I'm going to keep ignoring you and do it anyways,” Regina smiles. “Deal?”

Cady raises an eyebrow. “Doesn't sound like much of a deal to me.”

Regina strokes Cady’s cheek with her thumb again. “Do you wanna go see the rest of the penguin exhibit?”

“...yes.”

Regina smirks, glancing down the hall. No one is around, so she leans in and gives Cady a quick and gentle kiss before taking Cady’s hand. “Come on, this is our last stop.”

The pair make it back to the exhibit just in time to see Walter and Skipper reenter through a small enclosure door. They watch as the penguin pair mingle with some of the others, but Walter ends up cuddling up next to Skipper. 

Cady leans on the railing overlooking the enclosure, Regina standing behind her with her arms wrapped around Cady’s waist. They watch the penguins in relative silence, giving a brief wave to the caretaker when he appears in the enclosure to feed the rest of the penguins. 

“This was so much fun,” Cady says quietly. “Even if I'm still protesting the amount you spent.”

“I'm glad you enjoyed it,” Regina smirks. “We technically have one more stop, actually.”

Cady looks over her shoulder. “What's that?” 

“The gift shop!” 

Cady is very pointedly not trying to claim she likes anything, and Regina is very adamantly trying to buy her something . The debate between them is still mostly playful. Cady isn't actually mad, but she is having a hard time wrapping her brain around dating someone super rich. 

It was already a little much sometimes when Regina gave her gifts, like that stupidly expensive lipstick that was still in Cady’s possession from the other night. And that was before they were dating. Cady’s pretty sure she’ll get over it eventually, but right now, it's breaking her brain a little. 

She keeps up the front until she spots a section of stuffed penguins, and her eyes go wide. There's a giant one that looks just like Walter, and Regina sees the twinkle in Cady’s eye. She grabs the giant penguin off the shelf, despite Cady's protests, and buys it. Cady walks out of the shop with it in her arms, pouting slightly. 

“Come on, it looks like Walter!” Regina says as they head back towards the parking lot. 

“He does,” Cady replies, “but he's so big, I can't hold your hand.”

Regina smiles, wrapping an arm around Cady's shoulders. “There, how's that?”

Cady smiles brightly back at her. “Much better.”

God , Regina thinks, could she get any cuter?

Cady insists on buckling “Walter Jr” into the backseat, which Regina just grins at. When they both side back into the front seats, Regina turns to look at Cady. 

“I didn't actually upset you, right?”

“No, G, you didn't,” Cady assures her. “It… it is a lot to wrap my head around. And there will be times I do draw the line. But I know I'm not going to be able to stop you completely.” 

Regina grins. “That's fair. Besides,” she reaches across, twirling one of Cady’s pigtails in her fingers, “I like making you happy. And the way you looked today, with those penguins? Worth every single penny.” 

Cady blushes. “It was really fun. Thank you, for all of it.” She points a thumb to the backseat. “And thank you for Walter Jr.”

Regina laughs lightly, before leaning in and kissing Cady. Cady returns the kiss eagerly, having wanting to do more of this all day. Still, she's acutely aware that it's still light out, and they are kissing in a car in public. Regina's very expensive and somewhat flashy car. She pulls back, grinning softly at Regina. “We are still in public,” Cady points out. 

Regina nods, pulling back fully and starting the car. “We do still have one more stop on our date?”

“This is your third one more stop ,” Cady teases. 

“One was aquarium exhibits , one was stops in the aquarium, and this is the last one of our date,” Regina clarifies. “And you do get to know this one.”

“Oh? What is it?”

“Dinner!” 

Cady grins. “G, I already knew that.”

“Yeah, but you don't know where I'm taking you.”

“Where?” 

Thirty minutes later, Cady is practically bouncing with excitement at an Ethiopian restaurant, waiting for their food to come. 

“I didn't know you liked Ethiopian food!” Cady says, impressed by how easily Regina navigated the menu. It's a clear sign to Cady that Regina has actually had it before. 

“Karen has got Gretchen and I to try a lot of new things over the years,” Regina tells her. “There was a little spot we went to back in New York at least once every couple of months. It's delicious . ” 

Cady grins. “It's pretty much my favorite. Well, of course, Kenyan dishes always have a special place in my heart, but the only Kenyan restaurant in Chicago closed a few years ago. It was so sad,” Cady sighs. “I can make a few good dishes though, my mom and I try to do it at least a few times a month. We’ll have to have you over for some!”

“I'd love that,” Regina smiles. “I’ve never had Kenyan food before.”

“It's so good. But I know I'm biased. It's what I grew up on.”

“Hey, I grew up on Midwestern casseroles, and I can't stand them.” Regina makes a face. “My mom made her crunchy tuna surprise, like, once a week.”

“...what's the surprise?” 

Regina just looks at her and shrugs. “Food poisoning?” 

Cady bursts out laughing, and Regina grins back at her. 

“Look, I never said my mother was a good cook.”

Cady just laughs harder, taking Regina’s hand and squeezing it. This, right here, right now, is the only place she wants to be.

“ Regina George! ” 

Gretchen has a finger pointed directly in Regina’s face. Regina gently pushes the finger away, smirking back at her, pleased with herself. 

“Yes?”

“You went on a date without consulting with us?” 

Regina leans back in her chair and crosses her arms. She’s just gotten back to her apartment complex after dropping Cady off at home. The rest of their dinner had been so much fun. They'd talked and ate and laughed. Cady ate all of her food again, which was extra impressive, since this time, the portions really were huge (unlike the first dinner she’d had with the former Plastics, which had really just been regular sized). 

Once Regina got back to her own complex, she decided to pay Gretchen and Karen a visit, knowing she needs to get them caught up on the latest developments.

She hadn't even told them about the kiss yet. 

“I did,” Regina replies, smug grin on her face. 

“With who ?” Gretchen demands. “How did you meet them?” 

Regina places a hand over her heart, feigning offense. “Oh, Gretchen, you have such little faith! What did we just talk about the other day?” 

Gretchen stares at her friend, face blank and confused. Karen’s eyes go wide with realization, the pieces clicking together. 

“Oh my God, you went on a date with Cady,” Karen gasps.

Regina grins and nods. “Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner!” 

Gretchen leans forward in her chair, elbows on the table. “Tell. Me. Everything .” 

Regina launches into the story, starting with a vague description of the fight Cady had with her mother about the video on Karen’s Instagram. Karen immediately starts apologizing, but Regina dismisses her apology with a hand wave. 

“It's not your fault she overreacted,” Regina tells her. “Don't apologize for things that aren't your fault.”

She keeps going, telling them about the long talk at Regina’s apartment and the kiss . Well, the multiple kisses they shared that day. Then she tells them about the date today, sparing no detail, and showing the pictures they got at the penguin encounter. 

“Oh! I have to make the post!” Regina takes her phone back, quickly drafting a caption for her solo picture with the penguin, thanking the aquarium for a great day and encouraging her followers to either visit or donate to help them in their conservation efforts. 

She even threw in a quick line for a soft launch. 

And thank you to Walter and Skipper, the penguins who made my date VERY happy today!

She screenshots the draft caption, sending it to Cady.

Regina - 7:43pm

Would it be okay with you if I posted this caption with one of the solo penguin pictures? I figured we could tease a soft launch.

Regina looks back up at her friends. “Sorry. You know how it is.”

Gretchen waves her off. “Don't worry about it. G, that's so cute! I can't believe you guys are already dating!” 

Karen nods. “It sounded like you were going to take things slow the other day.”

“We’re going at her pace,” Regina reminds them. “She kissed me , so, still at her pace.” 

Regina’s phone buzzes in her hand. She looks down, checking the new message. 

Cady - 7:45pm

Soft launch?

Regina - 7:45pm

It's when you tease a new relationship on social media without revealing exactly who it is. That's a hard launch.

Regina - 7:45pm

People will probably guess because of that leaked photo, but it's still up to you.

Cady - 7:46pm

You're the social media expert, I trust you on this. 

Cady - 7:46pm

Do whatever feels good. 

Regina grins. She goes back to her Instagram app and posts it. “Speaking of her pace, just got the approval for a soft launch.” 

“Oooh!” Gretchen snatches her own phone off the table, opening up Instagram. “Do you want us to add fuel to the fire?”

“Nah,” Regina shrugs. “I mean, comment if you want, but not on the sentence about the date.”

“Oh, that kind of soft launch?” Karen tilts her head. “I figured it’d be a vague picture or something.”

Regina shrugs again. “I mean, there's pictures of us already out there, between your posts and that leaked photo. This feels like the next step.” 

“That photo was really cute, by the way,” Gretchen says. “Of you two on the Riverwalk.” 

“Thanks,” Regina grins. “I thought so too. Just wish it hadn't leaked.” 

“Does this mean our Girls’ Nights are double dates now?” Karen asks. 

“Maybe. We should talk about it in the group chat.” Regina taps on her phone. “There, posted.” She pauses for a second, and then adds, “By the way, we have to do Saturdays for Girls’ Nights instead of Fridays. Cady works Saturday mornings, and I didn't realize her shift starts at 5am .”

Gretchen blinks. “ Jesus , that's early. Why didn't she say anything?” 

Regina shrugs. “No idea. But she was so exhausted Saturday. Definitely no more late Friday nights.”

Karen nods. “Got it! I can change our reservations for this week.” She looks down, tapping on her phone.

“You're the best, Kare,” Regina grins. 

“Oh, that penguin picture is so cute,” Gretchen says, looking at her phone. “It sounds like you two had a lot of fun.”

Regina smiles wider. “We really did. She was so excited. It was so cute.” She sighs, leaning back in her seat. 

“G, you are down bad ,” Gretchen laughs. 

Regina laughs along with her. “Oh, trust me. I know .”

Chapter Text

Cady’s week is starting out strong. 

She’s had an incredible date with Regina on Sunday, and comes home with the giant stuffed body of Walter Jr tucked in her arms. Betsy finds the stuffed animal both hilarious and adorable, and seems very charmed by the incredible date Regina had taken her on as Cady gushes about the whole thing. 

Cady relays this to Regina that night, of course. Regina considers it a point towards winning Dr. Heron’s trust back. Not that she ever really had it in the first place, but, hey, she's trying. 

Cady falls asleep texting Regina, curled up around Walter Jr. When she wakes up, she's excited to get to work, so she can see Regina again. 

That's how most of the start of the week goes. Cady goes to work, sees Regina (at least, on Monday and Wednesday), and then heads home after to shower. Regina texts her periodically throughout the day, and offers to have Cady over for a home cooked dinner and a movie most nights. 

Cady takes her up on the offer on Monday and Tuesday, but the two don't end up watching much of the movies they put on. By the time dinner is done, they usually end up making out on the couch until a timer goes off, letting them both know Regina needs to get Cady home so she can get enough sleep for work. 

They haven't gotten past making out. There's a couple moments where Cady pulls back, needing to separate and calm down. She's nervous, all things considered, about what comes beyond make-out sessions. Regina is calming and patient with her, as always, but she does feel bad for holding things up. 

“I just… I've never…” Cady stammers on Tuesday night, after she's physically pried herself off of Regina’s lap.

“Baby, it's okay,” Regina says, reaching over and cupping her cheek. “Whenever you're ready, I'll be here. I promise, I don't mind waiting for you.”

Cady blushes, leaning into the soft and gentle contact. “Are you sure?” 

“Of course I'm sure. Your pace, remember?”

“But what if my pace is too slow?”

“Baby,” Regina cups Cady’s other cheek, holding her face in both hands, “I promise you. I don't mind. I understand, okay? I don't want to rush you.”

Regina looks at her with such soft, caring eyes, Cady can't help but melt back into Regina’s arms. “Okay,” she says at last, cradled against Regina. “Thank you.”

Regina plants a gentle kiss on the top of Cady's head. “I've got you, baby. I've got you.”

Wednesday afternoon, Cady politely turns down Regina’s offer. 

Cady - 4:23pm

As much as I'd love to hang out again, I think I should get some time with my mom in before she leaves for her conference. 

Cady - 4:23pm

We were going to catch up on some of our shows tonight. 

Cady - 4:23pm

I'm sorry :(

Regina - 4:24pm

Baby, don't be sorry. It's totally okay. 

Regina - 4:24pm

What shows are you guys gonna watch?

Cady - 4:25pm

We’re behind on Grey’s Anatomy and SVU , so probably those two. 

Regina - 4:26pm

God, I cannot believe they're still making those shows. 

Cady - 4:26pm

I know, right? 

Cady - 4:26pm

You're not mad, right?

Regina - 4:27pm

Baby, I'm never going to be mad at you for wanting to spend time with your mom. 

Regina - 4:27pm

I promise you that. 

Cady - 4:28pm

Okay. Sorry for being so weird about it.

Regina - 4:28pm

Baby.

Regina - 4:28pm

Don’t apologize for things that aren’t your fault.

Regina - 4:28pm

Maybe we hang out Thursday or Friday?

Cady - 4:29pm

Thursday is a solid maybe. Depends on how therapy goes. I’m definitely good for Friday, though.

Regina - 4:29pm

I don’t mean this in any kind of rude way or anything, but, if you’ve had a good week, wouldn’t that mean therapy would be good?

Cady - 4:31pm

Sometimes when I have really good weeks is when therapy is the hardest.

Cady - 4:31pm

Sometimes it’s just, like, a reminder of what things could have been, I guess?

Cady - 4:31pm

I don’t know. It’s hard to explain.

Cady - 4:31pm

I'll definitely let you know though.

Regina - 4:35pm

Oh, okay.

Cady slumps back against the couch. She hates this part of it. Balancing her own mental health with Regina’s guilt. Probably another thing she needs to bring up in therapy. 

On Thursday morning, Cady sits in the waiting room of her therapist’s office, fidgeting with the bottom of her shirt. She's nervous, which she hasn't really been about therapy in a long time. 

“Cady?” 

Cady looks up to see Thalia standing in the doorway, a gentle smile on her face. Cady stands up, smiles back, and follows Thalia down the hallway to her office. 

Cady had been seeing Thalia for just under ten years. She’d had one therapist back in Evanston, however, when she and her mother moved to Chicago, they got Cady into a partial hospitalization program as soon as they could. Thalia had initially been Cady’s therapist at the first partial hospitalization program she’d done, and Cady had quickly bonded to her. After Cady left that program, Thalia had offered her a spot in her limited private practice, and she’d taken it immediately. She’d since transitioned to fill time private practice, leaving the hospital program a few years back. She’d started her career there, and Cady was one of her very first clients. They’d both grown a lot over the years, but their work together was far from over. Cady’s pretty sure she’ll be in therapy for the rest of her life. The only thing about that idea that makes her nervous is for when the inevitable day comes that Thalia retires.

Thalia really isn’t that much older than Cady, all things considered, about six years older. She supposes she has a long, long time before retirement comes. 

Thalia opens the door to her office, gesturing for Cady to go in. Cady heads right into the familiar space, curling up into a ball on the comfortable couch she knew so well. 

Thalia raises an eyebrow as she shuts the office door. “That's not a particularly promising sign.”

Cady sighs. “It's been… a good week.”

Thalia sits down in the chair across from the couch. “A too good week?” 

Cady nods. “Exactly. Well, kinda. It's been a rollercoaster.” The great thing about seeing the same therapist for ten years is that some things don't have to be explained over and over. Thalia immediately knows why a too good week is a bad thing for Cady, as opposed to another clinician, who would be extremely confused as to why Cady was upset about a great week. 

“Before we start, you know the drill,” Thalia says, to which Cady nods. “Have you had any thoughts of hurting yourself this week?”

“Nope,” Cady replies. She gets this question at the start of every single therapy session. If the answer is yes, there's more questions that dig into all the specifics to assess her risk factor. It's been a decently long while since she's had to answer more than one question, which Cady is fully aware of (and quite proud of).

Thalia ticks something down on her notepad, and then nods. “Let's start with whatever happened first after our last session, and work forward from there. I might stop you to dig into some stuff, but I'll try to let you finish first.”

“Well, I guess it started on Friday. Damian texted me, and we had a long phone call. He apologized for basically everything we talked about last week. About the way he’s treated me, about hiding Matt, all of it. He was willing to hear me out about Regina and wasn't so vehemently against it anymore.”

Thalia nods. “That's a good start. What about Janis?”

“At that point, she was still really mad,” Cady sighs. “Damian and I agreed that I should wait a little longer before trying her again. Damian and I had a good conversation, though. He told me all about Matt and stuff. They seem really good for each other.”

Thalia smiles. “That's good! I’m glad. I know Damian means a lot to you.”

Cady nods. “Yeah, I was definitely glad to hear it. So, later that night, I had the first official ‘Girls’ Night’ with Regina, Gretchen, and Karen.” Cady puts up air quotes around “Girls’ Night”. “Karen is super excited about us doing dinners out together, and she's turned it into this whole thing .”

“Good thing or bad thing?”

“Good thing,” Cady confirms. “It's just a lot more than I’m used to, at this point. But I had a ton of fun. We went to this super trendy place down by the Riverwalk, which, I mean, the food was decent, but the price tag was insane . Regina bought my food again, which, I mean, hey, I'll take it.”

“Very nice of her,” Thalia comments.

“I don't think I'd be able to go if she didn't,” Cady admits. “The places they like to go to… well, all three of them grew up rich, and they still are all rich. They have expensive tastes.” She shrugs. “So I'm not particularly shocked that they like these very expensive restaurants.” A soft smile spreads across Cady’s face. “But buying my food was nothing compared to what else Regina did.”

“Which was…?”

“She specifically made sure Karen picked a place with mocktails, because she knew Gretchen and Karen wanted to get drunk, but she didn't want me to feel left out with a glass of water again.” Her smile widens at the memory. “She also volunteered to stay sober to drive us, which, according to Gretchen and Karen, she never does. She usually protests being the… what’d they call it…”

“The designated driver?” Thalia offers. 

Cady snaps her fingers. “Yes, that's it. They kept calling it the DD.”

Thalia nods. “So she stayed sober for you?”

“She did,” Cady confirms, “even though I didn't ask her to or anything. We had mocktails together. It was a really nice gesture. And then, after dinner, Gretchen and Karen wanted to walk the Riverwalk a bit, so we did. They're super coupley, so Regina and I hung back a little bit. It was really cold, and neither of us had a jacket, but Regina wrapped her arm around my shoulder while we walked, and it helped. And it was also really cute.” Cady blushes for a second, before shaking her head. “There was this moment where we, like, almost kissed. We were looking out at the city and I was pressed up against her and we just looked at each other and… I was sure we were about to do it. And then Gretchen called us over because Karen was stumbling too much in her heels and we needed to go back.”

Thalia raises an eyebrow. “That… brings us to a very different place than we left off last week. You weren't sure what you felt last week.”

Cady nods. “Yeah. It all came together kind of quickly. I didn't realize it until that moment, I think. Just how much I liked her.” She sighs. “It turned into a rollercoaster of a weekend when I got home. Karen had posted a video of us cheersing our drinks on Instagram, and my mother saw it. She was convinced it was alcohol, and either I’d purposely drank, knowing what it would do to my medications, or Regina had tricked me into drinking.” 

Thalia stiffened up in her seat, motioning for Cady to go on. 

“We fought about… well, a lot. For, like, an hour. Some of it was the same stuff we've been hashing out for weeks. Regina, mostly. But I've gotten so tired of having the same conversations and fights over and over again and something in me just… snapped.”

“What do you mean?”

“I yelled at my mom, Thalia.” Cady curls her knees up to her chest. “I don't know the last time I did that. But I was just so tired of the same argument and I was honestly really upset that she kept insinuating that I was lying about the mocktails and I just… I brought up my dad.”

Thalia’s expression is neutral, but Cady has done enough therapy with her to catch her little tells. Her head tilts up ever so slightly, she blinks twice, and her pen drops down a line on her notepad. She’s alarmed. She gives a small nod, indicating for Cady to continue. 

“I brought up my dad and made the argument that what happened to me wasn't entirely Regina’s fault,” Cady explains. “I'm genetically predisposed. We all know this, but she's always refused to accept it.”

Thalia nods grimly. “I remember the old family therapy sessions.”

Cady lets out a tiny laugh, shaking her head. “Yeah. That hasn't changed basically at all since then. She refuses to acknowledge it or talk about it. We fought about that, and about her treating me like I'm made of glass. Not letting me take risks and all of that.”

Thalia stiffens up slightly, but she motions with a hand for Cady to keep going. 

“So we fought and I yelled and she asked me why I was doing all of this. It didn't make sense to her. Which, at that point, the only person who I’d explained the why to was you. And that's when it all just kind of came out. Like word vomit.”

“Regina’s feelings for you came out?” Thalia asks. 

“ My feelings for Regina,” Cady clarifies. “My present feelings for Regina.”

Thalia’s eyes widen. “ Oh .” She shouldn’t be that shocked, given Cady just said they’d almost kissed, but it still seems to surprise her.

“I hadn't realized it until the Riverwalk, but I hadn't put it into words or full thoughts until that argument,” Cady explains. “I didn't even process it until after the words came out of my mouth.” 

Thalia nods. “I've been watching it build more rapidly these last couple of weeks. I had a feeling this was coming sooner rather than later, but I didn't particularly expect the realization to be that .”

“You and me both,” Cady laughs. “So, yeah. I word vomited my feelings, and then got really mad because she just kept… I don't know. It was so dismissive. Treating me like glass again. So I just kind of yelled at her that I was done having this argument, that I was going to bed, and that after work on Saturday I was going to Regina's and she couldn't stop me. That I know she thinks it's a bad idea, but I don't, and I'm tired of listening to the same stuff over and over. I was done with it. Then I stomped off to my room.” 

“Was that the end of the argument?”

Cady nods. 

“Alright, I wanna pause and dig into that a bit before we keep going,” Thalia tells her. “That was a lot.”

“Yeah, it sure was,” Cady grumbles. 

“You said you couldn't remember the last time you yelled at your mother,” Thalia begins, “and at first, neither could I. But then you mentioned something about risks, and it came to me.”

Cady squinted. “I still don't remember.”

“Around… maybe three years ago?” Thalia scratches the side of her head. “I guess the timing doesn't matter too much. But it was when the opportunity came up for you to go from part-time to full-time at work, and she was very much against you doing that.”

Cady straightens up in her seat. “I remember that!” She rubs the side of her head. “ God , that was such a tense few weeks.” 

“It was,” Thalia says with a terse nod. “You were upset for a few more weeks about yelling, but you kept saying you didn't regret what you said. Just that you yelled.”

Cady nods back. “Yeah, I remember. That's what happened here, too. I don't regret saying what I said. I just wish I hadn’t yelled it at her.” 

“You’re a very emotional person, Cady, and that's not a bad thing. You feel your emotions to their extremes, good and bad, and you wear your heart on your sleeve. But in all the years I've known you, the one emotion you almost never express is anger.” Thalia gives her a pointed look. “These two examples might be the only times I've ever seen you get angry with someone you care about. Frustrated? Yes. Annoyed? Yes. But not angry .” 

Cady shrugs. “I'm not a very angry person.”

“That's my observation as well. But I am seeing a connection between these two incidents, and I'm curious if you've spotted it as well.”

Cady blinks at her therapist. She tilts her head, thinking. She remembers her conversation with Regina after the fight, and something Regina had said. 

You stood up for yourself.

“I stood up for myself,” Cady repeats, her legs dropping off the couch, instead of pressed up against her chest. “Both times, I was standing up for myself.”

“That's right,” Thalia smiled. “You were. Both times, you described feeling like she was treating you like you were made of glass, and got angry with her when she wouldn't let up.”

“It's not that,” Cady shakes her head. “It's that she doesn't listen . She gets an idea in her head of how things should go for me, and if I deviate from that, it doesn't matter what I say. She can't be swayed. It’s so frustrating.” 

Thalia nods. “That frustration builds and builds until you hit a breaking point, right?”

Cady nods back. “Yes, exactly !” She slumps back against her seat. “I know where this is going.”

Thalia smirks. “You and I have done this for a long time, Cady. We both know your patterns. What happens when you hold in all your sadness until you reach a breaking point?”

“I go into crisis,” Cady sighs, as if she’s answered that question a thousand times. “Same thing, different emotion.”

Thalia nods. “ Exactly . I want to put a pin in that, work on some strategies for letting out frustration and anger in smaller doses, either later this session or next week. There’s more story to tell, isn’t there?”

Cady nods. “ So much more. So, after I locked myself in my room, I sat on the floor and cried for a little bit. Then I ended up asking Regina, Gretchen, and Karen to block my mom on social media.” She frowns. “Maybe that was too much.” 

Thalia shrugs. “I’m not here to judge the ways in which you want your mom present in your life. Establishing boundaries and some sense of privacy is perfectly healthy.” 

“Yeah, but like, their Instagrams are the opposite of private,” Cady points out. “I knew they were influencers, but I learned this week that Regina has over three million followers , and both Gretch and Kare have over a million each.”

Thalia lets out a low whistle. “How’d you learn this information? Did you reactivate your account?”

Cady shakes her head. “No, I’m still staying off social media. Regina told me.” She frowns. “Anyways, that’s a tangent. So, I’m sitting on the floor, and I sent that message in our group chat. Regina is immediately asking if I’m okay and what happened and reaching out to me over direct texts and stuff. And I made a split second decision and called her.” 

“I didn’t really explain what happened beyond saying we had a bad fight over the usual stuff, and I didn’t want to talk about it at that point,” Cady explains. “I asked her to stay on the phone with me, because I could tell I was on the brink of spiraling.” 

Thalia nods. “Good job recognizing that. You’ve gotten really good at it.” 

Cady smiles softly. “Thanks. So, yeah, she stayed on the phone with me until I fell asleep. I hadn’t told her about my feelings yet, but when she asked what she could do to help… I asked her to just talk to me so I could hear her voice. She ended up reading her book out loud to me until I fell asleep.”

“That’s very sweet. I noticed a very specific word in that sentence, though. You hadn’t told her your feelings yet .”

“We’re getting there,” Cady promises. “So the next morning, I went to work exhausted, because I wasn’t really expecting us to be out that late, since we weren’t expecting to do the Riverwalk, and I wasn’t expecting to fight with my mom for, like, an hour.” She sighs. “Then I get to work and find out from my coworkers that a photo of Regina and I on the Riverwalk leaked on some tabloid account for influencers.”

“I did see that,” Thalia admits. 

“You did?” Cady asks. “You follow influencer tabloids?”

Thalia shakes her head. “My daughter is super into influencers. I try to follow along with stuff she’s saying. She showed me the picture because it was the Riverwalk, and we go there sometimes. Obviously, I didn’t tell her I knew you or anything. It was just a surprise, that's all.”

Cady nods. She’s learned tiny bits and pieces of information about Thalia’s daughter over the last ten years. The girl was in middle school now. Cady had sort of watched her grow up over the years, through small bits of information she obtained through Thalia. It wasn’t like Thalia spoke about her personal life often in sessions, as that would be wildly inappropriate, but there were small moments like this one, where it made sense to disclose certain bits of information. 

“It was a surprise to me too,” Cady admits. “Then all my coworkers were asking me questions all morning and it was such an exhausting day.” She smiles lightly. “Then, an hour before my shift was over, Regina showed up, got coffee, and just hung out nearby until I was ready to go. I told her I was having kind of a rough morning on my break, so she showed up to try to make me feel better.”

“Did it work?”

“It absolutely did,” Cady laughs. “After work, we went back to her place. We talked for a very long time. About a lot of things. Mostly the fight with my mom, at first. I ended up telling her what happened to my dad, because, well, that’s a big part of the context for that fight.” 

Thalia nods. “How’d she take that?”

Cady shifts uncomfortably. “Well, the stuff about my dad, she took that part, like, well, I guess? We moved pretty quickly from talking about my dad to talking about me , once I filled in the context. I told her about my passive SI and she froze up.”

“She froze up?”

“She froze up. She started panicking, I think. She knew what she did back then messed me up, but I guess she didn't realize it had led to that.” Cady sighs. “Which, my whole point of telling her about my father was to demonstrate that I was predisposed to this stuff, and I didn't blame her. In fact, I forgave her.”

Thalia sits up straight. “You forgave her?”

“I did,” Cady nods. “I stand by that. What happened, happened , and yes, it was horrible , but… She’s such a different person now. She’s horrified by what she did and would apologize every single day for the rest of her life if I let her.” Cady gives the tiniest of shrugs. “I’m willing to move on from the past. I want to move on. I don't want us to be hashing this out forever. I forgive her.”

“What happened after she started to panic?” 

“I did what I could to ground her, bring her back down to Earth,” Cady explained. “Did some breathing exercises with her. Talked her through my thought process for forgiving her. She still apologized a few more times, but she calmed down..”

“It sounds like you handled that very well,” Thalia nods. 

Cady grins. “Gotta use that decade of therapy somewhere.”

Thalia laughs, bringing a bigger grin to Cady’s face. Making Thalia laugh in therapy always feels like a win, even though it doesn’t really mean anything. 

“Anyways, after that, I went on this whole little speech about like… my mom and my dad and everything. I told her I still have episodes, which at first, she thought was like that day in the coffee shop. I explained to her what they're actually like, which, we’ll get to more on that later. That's when I told her my mom kept asking why she makes me so happy.” She smiles softly. “And I kissed her.”

Thalia sits up, eyes going wide. “That's… wow.” She squints for a second. “Wait, was that your first kiss?”

Cady shakes her head. “No, I kissed a guy back in Kenya, a million years ago. But it was my first one since , so, sort of, I guess?” She laughs lightly. “We, um, we did a lot of kissing that night.”

Thalia chuckles lightly. “So she responded well to that.”

“ Oh yes,” Cady laughs. She's so much more relaxed now on the couch, her legs tucked to the side. “We eventually finished the conversation about the fight, and then we talked about the kiss. How I realized my feelings. And how I wasn't really expecting to kiss her going into the conversation, but I did what felt right in the moment. We agreed to keep taking things slow. Neither of us want to mess this up, and, well, I've never been in a relationship, as you are very well aware.” 

Thalia nods. They'd talked at length about Cady’s lack of a love life, and her anxieties around dating. Until recently, the only person she’d ever realized she’d really liked died , which had done a number on her developing brain. 

“We talked about the leaked picture a bit, but there wasn't much to say,” Cady shrugs. “It happened. It apparently happened to Regina a lot more back in New York, which, I guess makes sense. We agreed to keep things as private as we could for now, but that it might be public one day.” 

Thalia hums. “How do you feel about the idea of being public?”

Cady shrugs again. “I mean, I still have no intentions of opening any social media accounts. I do not think that'll go well for me. If , and this is a big if, I were to make an account again, it would be private, and I’d only follow my mom and my friends. That's it . But even then, I don't think I want to do that. At least, not right now.”

Thalia nods. “I think that would be very wise. Social media can be very unhealthy for folks in recovery from mental illness.”

“I know how I am about comparing myself to others,” Cady says. “No reason to open myself up to more of that.”

“ God , I wish more of my clients were as self aware as you are,” Thalia chuckles. 

Cady grins. “Only took ten years to get here.”

Thalia laughs again, before asking another question. “So, I want to back up a bit. You kissed Regina! How're you feeling about that?”

“ Incredible ,” Cady sighs. “It just… it makes sense. She's just so… she's so beautiful, and so kind, and just… I feel so cared for and special when I'm with her. Kissing her? Oh my God .” 

“Sounds like you have a lot of big feelings about her.”

“I do,” Cady smiles softly. “They're positive, mostly.”

“Mostly?” Thalia raises an eyebrow. 

“There's… there's a part of me that can't forget, you know? The trauma response part of my brain. It gets smaller and smaller every day, but that little reminder is still there,” Cady frowns. 

Thalia nods. “That makes sense. Have you talked with her about that at all?”

“A bit on Sunday,” Cady tells her. “Which was a whole other thing.”

“Go on, we’ll come back to this.”

“Well, first, we have to go back to Saturday.” Cady sighs. “Regina is… concerned about my eating habits. Which, I get it. They aren't great. It's better than where it was, but it's not great.” 

Thalia nods. “Oh, yes. I'm familiar.”

“Right, well, she didn't like… scold me for not eating or anything. She just… wanted me to help her understand where the issues were.” She frowns slightly. “I know she has had her fair share of body image issues. I don't know how deep it goes, but I remember her counting calories and stuff back in high school, before Aaron died. She also makes a big point out of, like, not talking about other people’s bodies and stuff. So I know there's something more there, but we haven't talked about it yet. Anyways, she wanted to know how she could help.”

“I told her the biggest issue is remembering to eat lunch most days, which is mostly true,” Cady shrugs. “Sometimes I remember but I'm just really not hungry. Because of my meds.”

Thalia nods. “You've spoken with your psychiatrist about this, right?”

“Plenty of times,” Cady confirms. “It's an unfortunate side effect of the only antidepressant cocktail that actually works for me, so it's something I just have to, like, deal with.”

“Just checking. Continue.”

“Right, so, I told her about my nutritionist and stuff. She wants to try to remind me to eat lunch, which, admittedly, she has every day since.” Cady smiles softly. “She even bought me lunch after my shift on Monday before she went back to work.” 

“How’ve you been feeling about that?”

“It's sweet,” Cady tells her. “It's clear she really cares. It's never, like, telling me I need to eat. Just a reminder to eat if I haven't.”

“And have you been eating?” 

“Monday and Tuesday yes, Wednesday, no,” Cady admits. “I just really wasn't hungry Wednesday.”

“Did you tell her you skipped lunch?”

Cady shakes her head. “I'm still trying to figure out… how to navigate that, I guess. Like, obviously, I know I have a big team supporting me and, like, I wouldn't describe myself as independent in a lot of areas, but this is one thing I'm kind of used to just being able to do day-to-day without having to directly explain myself to anybody, you know?”

Thalia nods. “Regardless of everything else you have going on, that's a very normal hesitation in a new relationship, especially when you've been single for a long time. It can be difficult to strike the balance between independence and support, especially at first.”

“Yeah, that sums it up.” Cady sighs. “Okay, there's still so much more to get through. I have to keep going.”

Thalia gestures with her hand. “Go ahead.”

“So, that whole conversation happened at Regina's, and then, Saturday night, I got home, and my mom and I talked for a long time. Honestly, I don't think she really slept much Friday night. She looked terrible when I got home, and she was still in the same clothes.” Cady frowns. “She apologized for everything, and actually heard me out for the first time in weeks, which, oh my God , what a relief that was.”

“I'm a bit surprised she changed her tune that quickly.” 

“You and me both,” Cady sighs. “It went way better than I could have possibly expected. When I told her I kissed Regina, she didn't even, like, get defensive about it. She asked me to tell me about Regina, the new Regina, because all she had was memories of the old Regina.”

“So I rambled to her about Regina for a little while, and she agreed to give her a chance.” Cady smiles softly. “She even agreed to have Regina over for dinner when she gets back from her conference.”

“I want you to keep going, but I also want to note that I do want to talk about the conference before we run out of time,” Thalia says. “Just a reminder.”

“Oh, trust me, so do I,” Cady tells her. “I'm going to try to power through the rest of this stuff. So, yeah, conversation with my mom went really well. She apologized, we hugged, everything's great on that front again. Sunday morning, I talked to Damian, updated him , then called Janis and spoke to her for the first time since that fight.”

“How did that go?”

“A bit better than expected, but she's still pretty mad at Regina. Regina also told me something that shines a little bit of new light on that whole situation.”

Thalia raises an eyebrow. “How so?”

“Apparently, the kiss they had during that spin the bottle game,” Cady gestures, to which Thalia nods, confirming she remembers the story Cady told her after the fight with Damian and Janis had happened, “that was how Regina knew she liked girls, but she couldn't process it at the time, so she lashed out instead.” Cady sighs. “Which made the trauma part of my brain basically start screaming , because, well, that's pretty similar to what she did to me in high school.”

Thalia leans back in her seat. “Do you know if she's done anything similar since?”

Cady squints. “She's mentioned this one ex from college a few times that she's ‘not proud’,” Cady uses air quotes, “of how things ended, but she hasn't really explained what that means , exactly.” 

“I have a feeling we’ll be digging into this more in future sessions.”

“You and me both,” Cady sighs. “Anyways. The conversation with Janis did go better than expected, and we’re okay again. Which brings me to Sunday afternoon, when Regina took me on our first date.” A huge smile spreads across Cady’s face. “She surprised me and took me to the aquarium, which was so much fun. She let me drag her all over the place and ramble nonstop about all the animals. And then , the best part by far , she got us one of those penguin encounter things, where we got to pet some penguins and watch them play and stuff.” Cady pulls out her phone. “I have to show you a picture, because it was literally the cutest thing I've ever done in my life .”

“That sounds perfect for you,” Thalia says, a smile on her face. She briefly takes the phone that Cady extends to her, a photo of Cady and Regina with Walter and Skipper on the screen. “Oh my God , that is so cute.” 

Cady takes her phone back, still grinning. “It was literally so much fun. And then after, she took me out for Ethiopian food, because she knew it was one of my favorites.” She shakes her head, still smiling. “We had a little like… I don't even want to call it an argument , but she wouldn't tell me how much it cost to do the penguin encounter, because it was also a private session. I felt a little weird about that, but, like, at the same time… It was such an incredible date and it was so clear to me that she just pays attention to the things I like and really put it all into play. It just made me feel really special, you know?”

“It sounds like she tried, and succeeded, at wooing you,” Thalia says. “I don't want to brush past the thing about the cost, though.”

“I know, it's just, there's more, and we’re coming up on time soon,” Cady sighs. “That day, I also told her about the conference, and the timing and everything. She's very ready to help however she can, so there's that. I know you wanted to make sure we talked about the conference, too.” 

Thalia nods. “That was one of my big questions, if she knew it was coming up or not. And she knows about the timing of your episodes?”

Cady nods. “She does.”

“And what about your safety plan?” 

Cady bites her lip. “No, I haven't shown her that.” 

“You should, before your mother leaves,” Thalia says with a serious nod. 

Cady shifts uncomfortably. “Well, that's the thing…”

Thalia raises an eyebrow, gesturing for Cady to go on. 

“The start of the week was really good, we saw each other after she got done with work on Monday and Tuesday. We just went to her house, had dinner there, watched movies, kissed, all that,” Cady shrugged. “But then yesterday, I said no to hanging out because I wanted to spend some time with my mom before she left, which was not the problem.” 

“What was the problem then?”

“She asked about today, and I told her I didn't know, it depended on how therapy went.” Cady sighs. “She was like, ‘wait, but it was a good week’, and I had to explain to her that sometimes those are the hardest.” Cady curls up her legs to her chest. “I didn't get too deep into it, but enough for her to start feeling the guilt again. And I just…” 

Cady sighs again. “I can't balance both my own present mental health needs and her guilt of the past. Like, it was fine when we had that conversation the other day and the passive SI got brought up and she panicked, because, well, I was expecting something like that at first. But I… I feel bad when she feels guilty, and she feels guilty when I'm having any kind of mental health problem that could be traced back to her, which, admittedly, a lot of my mental health problems can.” She looks at Thalia. “Do you see where I'm going with this?”

Thalia nods. “Yes, I see where the problem is.” She crosses one knee over the other. “Have you spoken to her about this?”

Cady shakes her head. “We haven't spoken much since yesterday. It's been kind of tense since.” 

“This is a conversation you need to have with her if this is all going to work,” Thalia warns her, “and it needs to be before your mother’s conference. If you have a serious enough episode…”

“I know, I know,” Cady sighs, closing her eyes. “I probably need to talk to her about it today.”

Thalia nods. “I think that would be a very good idea. And you should still show her your safety plan, in case you need it.”

Cady drops her head into her hands. “I hate this. I hate having to plan my life around my next crisis. I had a good fucking week , and the fact I had a good week was a problem. I can't even enjoy that.”

Thalia raises an eyebrow at Cady's swear. It's very rare that she swears, so Thalia knows this one’s been building up. “You can enjoy it, Cady. It sounds like you really have. Life is just like this sometimes. It's very rare for the majority of people to have nothing go wrong over the course of a week.” 

Cady looks up at her therapist. “Yeah, but they aren't planning for the next crisis.”

“Honestly? People who do plan ahead are better off than most,” Thalia shrugs. “Cady, you know how to navigate your episodes and your crises. That's more than can be said for most of the population. That's not a bad thing. It's a strength.”

“Well, it feels like shit.”

Thalia grins slightly. “I’d also guess most people would argue being in crisis feels like shit.” 

That does get a small laugh out of Cady. 

“You're doing great , Cady. Honestly . There's some stuff I still want to process through with you, but I know we’re running out of time this week,” Thalia pauses, glancing at her watch, “so we’ll revisit it next week, pending any crises.”

Cady nods. “We’re still good for Tuesday evening, right?”

Thalia nods back. “We are, and you can always text me if you need an emergency session. But, seriously, Cady, you handled everything this week great. You let yourself enjoy the positives and worked through the negatives. Was it a rollercoaster? Yes. But you stood up for yourself , picked your battles, and, for the first time since I've known you, made it through a session after a good week without crying .”

Cady blinks. “I… I guess I did, huh?” 

“You sure did,” Thalia says with a grin. “I’ll leave you with this to think about: This is the start of a new chapter for you, and there's going to be a lot of opportunities for good weeks in your future. It might be time to start trying to think about them in a different way. You're past the worst of it, Cady, by a longshot. That doesn't mean things are always going to be perfect and there won't be setbacks. But it does mean that you’re at the moving forward part of recovery. Let yourself do that .” 

And with that, the clock ticks over, and their hour is up.

Cady takes a deep breath, and nods. “I’ll think about that one. And I'll talk to Regina and show her the safety plan.”

“Good,” Thalia smiles. “I'll see you on Tuesday, Cady.”

Cady stands up from her seat. “I'll see you Tuesday.”

Regina’s been in a mood since yesterday afternoon. She’d been able to isolate yesterday, but this morning, she’s been on a bit of a tirade. 

She snapped at someone from a different office in the building when they were in the elevator because he was staring at her. She didn't feel bad about that. Men always stared at her in ways she didn't like. 

But then, she was short with the front desk receptionist for her company, dismissive towards Karen, and even testy with Raúl, her personal receptionist. She shut herself in her office for most of the morning, with explicit instructions to Raúl to turn anyone away who came looking for her. 

She knew exactly why she was in a bad mood, and she hated herself for it. Cady had been honest with her, and Regina was feeling guilty. Instead of letting herself be sad about the guilt, she found it morphing into anger. 

It’s an old coping mechanism, probably the oldest one she has, and she's angry with herself for defaulting back to it. She's better than this, dammit! She’s put in so much work in therapy to not be like this. 

Why can't she feel her feelings like a normal person?

Why does her girlfriend have a bad time in therapy after a good week?

Regina knows the answer to the second question. It's her fault. She is to blame for Cady's current mental state. Sure, Cady had given her that long speech the other day about genetic predispositions and everything but at the end of the day, Regina had been the catalyst. 

Cady might have forgiven her, but that doesn't mean that Regina has forgiven herself. 

Regina is pulled out of her spiraling thoughts by the buzzing of her phone on her desk. She snatches it up, relieved to see who the notification is from, as more start to pour in. 

Cady - 11:03am

Hi :) I hope you're having a good day so far!!

Cady - 11:03am

I just got done with therapy, just waiting for my mom to come get me. 

Cady - 11:03am

It went a lot better than I expected, honestly, which I'm really glad about. 

Cady - 11:03am

I do think there's some stuff we should talk about tonight though, if you're still available. If not, we can talk about it tomorrow.

As soon as she reads the messages, Regina's anger is replaced with a sense of relief. Her shoulders slump and she lets out a deep breath. 

There's a bit of anxiety gnawing in her stomach at Cady wanting to talk about something tonight, but she tries to bury it down as she types her response. 

Regina - 11:04am

Hi!! 😊 I’m so glad therapy went well! I’m still available after work. Do you want me to pick you up from your place?

Cady - 11:04am

Nah, I think I'm gonna walk today. It's gorgeous out and I think the fresh air will do me some good.

Cady - 11:04am

What time are you getting out of work?

Regina - 11:04am

My last meeting is supposed to run till 5, but I could probably cut it short if you want.

Cady - 11:05am

No, no, finish your meeting. I'll try to get to your place a little after 5!

Regina drums her fingers on the edge of her desk. She's still feeling anxiety, nausea in her stomach. 

Regina - 11:06am

Can I ask you something?

Cady - 11:06am

Of course.

Regina - 11:06am

This isn't a breakup talk, is it?

Cady - 11:06am

Oh, baby, no.

Cady - 11:06am

It's about stuff with next week. 

Cady - 11:06am

I'm sorry if I worried you.

Regina lets out a very long sigh of relief before typing again. 

Regina - 11:07am

Oh thank god.

Regina - 11:07am

I always read too deep into things, that's not your fault.

Regina - 11:07am

Sorry.

Cady - 11:08am

We have to stop apologizing to each other for having feelings all the time :P

Cady - 11:08am

My mom is taking me out to lunch so I'll talk to you later, okay? And I promise, everything's gonna be okay. 

Regina - 11:08am

Okay, have a good lunch! I'll see you later 😊

Regina - 11:09am

Let me know if you change your mind about wanting a ride.

Cady - 11:09am

Will do!

Regina locks her phone and leans back in her office chair, letting out a low groan. She rubs her temples. She's been so wound up all damn day, over absolutely nothing. Her angry outbursts come back to her, and the all-too-familiar guilt washes over her. 

She stands up from her desk, determined. She doesn't plan on apologizing to the guy who was staring at her, even if she knew who he was or where he worked, but she does plan on apologizing to Karen, Raúl, and the front desk receptionist. 

No use in wallowing in guilt when she could just make things right . 

Cady arrives at Regina’s apartment building just a few minutes after 5:00. She knows she’s a little early, but she’s feeling anxious, and doesn't want to be late. She’s got her smaller messenger bag with her again, tucked against her side. She’s fidgeting with the straps, pacing back and forth outside of the building while she waits for Regina to arrive. 

It’s nearly quarter past five when she spots Regina approaching, walking home from work. Cady straightens up when she sees her approach, a big smile on Cady’s face.

“Hey, you,” Regina says with a smile as she gets closer. She wants to so badly greet Cady with a kiss, but they’re in public. She takes Cady’s hand instead. “I hope you weren’t waiting too long.”

Cady shakes her head. “No, only like, ten minutes,” she shrugs. “But I know I got here early anyways.”

“I tried to wrap up my meeting a little early,” Regina sighs, leading Cady into the lobby of the building, heading past security with a nod. “But everyone had something to say about the project.”

“Don’t worry about it, seriously,” Cady says with a gentle smile. “I wasn’t waiting for too long, really.”

Regina takes a deep breath. “Alright.”

“You okay?” Cady asks softly while they wait for the elevator. 

“Just a weird day,” Regina admits. “I was in kind of a mood this morning, and then I got over it, but I’ve been just… anxious, the last couple of hours.”

Cady nods. “Sorry if… that was because of me.”

Regina waves her free hand. “It’s okay. I know how to handle my anxiety. I’m just glad to be home, and to see you.” 

When they’re in the elevator, and the doors shut behind them, Cady steps closer, leaning up and catching Regina’s lips in a soft and gentle kiss. Regina returns the kiss, her hands finding their home on Cady’s hips. Cady smiles at the touch, grabbing onto Regina’s waist. Regina tugs her in closer, and for the first time all day, everything feels right in Regina’s world. She’s here, with Cady, kissing her. Nothing else matters.

The elevator dings, and they quickly step apart, a bit dazed. They’re on Regina's floor already. Cady giggles and takes Regina’s hand again, the other girl still a bit stunned. 

“Come on,” Cady says softly, guiding Regina off the elevator. “Let’s go talk so we can get back to that.” 

Regina takes a minute to get changed into more casual clothes after getting home. She’s always dressed to perfection for work, which, of course . She’s the CEO of a designer fashion label. She has to look immaculate at work. 

At home, though, at home she can just be Regina , not Regina George . It’s just her and Cady, and God , that feels like heaven. 

When Regina emerges from her bedroom, she finds Cady sitting on her couch, her messenger bag tucked at her feet, and a folder on the table. Regina raises her eyebrow at the folder.

“What’s that?”

“We’ll get to it in a minute,” Cady tells her. She pats the spot next to her, which Regina takes cautiously. “I’m not mad at you, but we have to talk about this.”

Regina nods slightly. “I’ll be real, I’m still not sure what this is.”

“Yesterday,” Cady says. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but you seemed to get kind of… distant, after I explained about good weeks and therapy.”

Regina looks down at her lap, biting her lip. “Yeah, I did. I, um, well, the guilt got to me again.”

Cady nods, taking Regina’s hand. “That’s what I figured.” She takes a deep breath. “I don’t want to tell you how to feel your emotions or how to handle them or anything, but I just… I’m feeling nervous.”

Regina raises an eyebrow, looking up at Cady. “Nervous?”

“I’m worried about having to… I don’t know how to put this,” Cady sighs. “This was so much easier earlier.” 

“Take your time,” Regina says softly. She begins rubbing small circles on the back of Cady’s hand with her thumb.

Cady gives a little smile at the extra contact. God, she just has to say it. She takes a deep breath, and lets the word vomit take over. “I’m worried that if and when I have an episode or other mental health crisis going on, it’s going to trigger your guilt, and then I’m going to be dealing with both my own thing and that at the same time and I know it’s not something that should be one-sided anyways but I just don’t know if I can do that when I’m in crisis and-.”

“Baby,” Regina says softly, taking Cady’s other hand. “Slow down. Take a deep breath for me, please?”

Cady takes another deep breath, closing her eyes for a moment. “Sorry,” she says softly. “I’m just… overwhelmed, I think. Everything’s so real all of a sudden and I don’t know what to do.”

Regina squeezes Cady’s hands lightly. “Can I say something?”

Cady nods, opening her eyes. “Of course.”

“I’m sorry about yesterday,” Regina begins. “It wasn’t fair to you, I know that. I’m… I’m working on the guilt. I really am trying. It’s just going to take some time, and I will get there.” She hesitates for a moment, and then adds, “I know you forgave me, and I'm glad you did, obviously, but I haven't really forgiven myself yet, you know?”

“I know,” Cady nods again. “I just… I'm worried we won't ever be able to move past it, I guess.”

“We will ,” Regina insists, squeezing both of Cady’s hands again. . “I just need a bit more time. And I am going to try my very best to be cautious with my reactions. I just… it… nevermind.”

Cady looks at her. “No, what were you going to say?”

“It sounded too mean in my head,” Regina admits. “I don’t want to.”

“Please, just say it.”

Regina sighs, closing her eyes. “It’s not really fair to me that I’m not allowed to have emotions about these things.” She opens them back up, looking down at her lap. “I know I can’t really compare what we went through, but it's not… it's not like I came out unscathed either, you know? And I don't mean to say that it's like the same or anything, I just-.”

“Baby,” Cady cuts her off, squeezing Regina’s hands. “I know what you mean. You're right. That's not fair to you.” She takes a deep breath. “I think the main thing I need to know is: if and when I do have an episode or a crisis, are you going to be able to put your guilt aside in the moment and be there for me?”

“Of course,” Regina says at once. “Not only will I be able to do that, it is what I will do.” 

Cady looks at her for a long moment, searching her eyes. At last, she gives a single nod, and says, “Okay.”

“Okay?”

“Okay.” Cady takes a deep breath, letting go of one of Regina’s hands and reaching for the folder on the coffee table. “There's one more thing we have to get through, and then we can cuddle on the couch and feel all our feelings together, okay?”

Regina smiles softly. “Sure, baby.”

Cady lets go of the other hand, putting the folder squarely in her lap. She takes a deep breath before opening it. “This is my safety plan,” she says as she flips open the folder. There's a few copies of a piece of paper in there, a filled out document with the answers handwritten. “These are the steps I'm supposed to follow if I start having suicidal thoughts.”

Regina sits up straight, eyes glued to the papers. “Can, I um, can I see?”

Cady nods, handing one of the copies to her. “I made it a few years ago, so some parts of it are a little out of date. I haven't had to use it in a while, but both Thalia and my mom think it's really important you see this before next week.” Cady sighs as she watches Regina’s eyes scan the paper. “And I mean, I agree with them, even if I'm really hoping it doesn't get to this point.”

Regina nods as she reads. The paper is broken down into sections, each one offering a step. The first step is identifying warning signs that a crisis may be developing. Cady has written down spiraling thoughts , dissociation , and excessive crying as her three warning signs. The second step is a list of internal coping strategies. Cady’s answers include changing immediate environment , watching a comfort movie , and deep pressure therapy . 

“What's deep pressure therapy?” Regina asks. 

“Stacking up as much weight on top of me as possible,” Cady explains. “Like, I have two weighted blankets and a couple of weighted stuffed animals. I'll literally just put them on my chest and lay there and breathe. It's soothing.”

Regina nods, eyes not leaving the paper. She's onto the next section now, people and settings that provide distractions. The first answer is, of course, her mother, followed by Damian. Regina noticed that Janis isn't written down, but there's only two spaces for people. The third space and fourth spaces are for settings. Cady has written down the park and my room . 

Number four is people Cady can ask for help. Again, her mom and Damian are listed, as well as Janis this time, their phone numbers all listed next to their names.

The fifth step is a list of professionals Cady can call. Thalia is at the top of the list, followed by the word therapist in parentheses, along with her phone number. Beneath her is the name Jasmine, followed by family therapist and her phone number. 

“How often do you and your mom do family therapy?” Regina asks. 

“We haven't in a couple of years,” Cady shrugs. “It used to be monthly. Things have been stable for a while, well, until recently, but, you know.”

Regina nods again. Beneath the clinicians’ names is the contact information for the local urgent care, followed by the suicide prevention hotline. The hotline is the only answer on this page that's been typed in, not handwritten. 

The sixth and final step is making the environment safe. There's only two answers there, supervision and keeping medicine/sharp objects out of sight . 

Regina swallows, looking back up at Cady. “When you use this, how far do you usually…” She trials off, unable to find the words. 

“I usually only get to step three,” Cady explains. “My mom is pretty much always there when I call. The other stuff I still had to fill out, but I've never used it. I've like, booked emergency sessions with my therapist, but it's not like… immediate. It's a next day kind of thing. And, like, obviously some of this is outdated. You're obviously on the list of people I can call for help and distractions and stuff.”

Regina nods. “I know.” She takes another deep breath. “Can I keep this? I saw multiple copies in there.”

Cady nods back. “That's why I have a few. I’ve never actually given one to someone before, but that's the idea.” She closes the folder, slipping it back into her messenger bag. “Ideally it won't come up at all. I really hope it doesn't, and I'm kinda hopeful that it won't . I've been doing well for a while now, and even though I know I'm probably still going to have an episode around my birthday, I don't know that it's going to escalate to crisis level, you know?” 

“Of course,” Regina replies. She puts the paper face down on the coffee table, taking another steadying breath. “Can… can we cuddle now?”

Cady smiles softly. “Yes, baby. We can cuddle.” 

Regina situates herself so that she’s sitting in the corner of her L shaped couch, legs out on the runner. She opens up her arms wide, and Cady crawls right in, curling up against her chest and sitting in her lap, her legs tucked against Regina.

Regina tightens her grip on Cady, holding her very close. She takes a slow, shaky breath, trying to subside the tears she can feel welling up. 

“Baby, don't hold back,” Cady says softly, reaching up and stroking Regina’s cheek. “Let yourself feel.” 

Regina closed her eyes tight, as the tears began to pool in her eyes. “I’m sorry,” she whispers, near silent.

Cady tucks her forehead against Regina’s cheek, pressing into her. “I forgive you, baby. But let yourself feel. Cry it out if you need to. I'm here. I've got you.”

Regina just nods once, and the tears start to flow. Cady cups one cheek with her hand, keeping her forehead pressed to the other. She strokes soothingly with her thumb, whispering to Regina over and over as she cries it out. 

“I'm sorry,” Regina just keeps saying over and over again. “I'm so, so, so sorry.”

“Can I show you something that helps me, baby?” Cady asks softly, still stroking Regina’s face. 

She can feel Regina nod against her, so Cady reaches down, grabbing one of Regina’s wrists and gently bringing it up. Cady guides Regina’s hand carefully up to her neck. “Two fingers,” she says softly, and Regina complies, tucking all fingers except her pointer and middle finger against her palm. Cady places the remaining fingers against her pulse point, a chill running down her spine at the contact. 

“Do you feel that?” Cady says softly. 

Regina’s eyes shoot open, and she nods. “Your heartbeat.”

“Yes,” Cady confirms, reaching up to put her own fingers of Regina’s pulse point. “It helps me to feel my own heartbeat sometimes. It reminds me that I'm here, I'm alive, and no matter what, it's going to be okay. Because that beat is still gonna be there, today, tomorrow, and the day after that, and the day after that.” She tucks her head against the hollow of Regina’s neck. “I figured it might help both of us to feel each other’s.”

Cady feels Regina’s hand and fingers settle in better near her pulse point. “It does,” Regina tells her, pulling her closer with her other arm. “Thank you, baby.”

“Of course,” Cady replies softly. “We’re in this together now, you know? We’ll help each other, however we can.”

Regina nods, pressing her head against Cady’s. “We sure will.”

Chapter Text

On Friday, Cady finds herself determined to have a good weekend. 

It's not hard at first. Friday starts off with work, and Regina comes into the shop around her usual time, which never fails to bring a smile to Cady’s face. 

They're doing much better, after yesterday. They cried it out for a while on Regina’s couch, before just holding each other for a long time. Cady ended up falling asleep in Regina’s arms for a short nap, which made Regina feel like just about the most special person on Earth as she held her close. 

Today, when Regina comes into the shop, they’re both all smiles. Some things might still be hard, yes, but they're going to get through them. Together. 

After work, Cady heads home, showers, eats (with Regina’s reminder), and basically just waits around for Regina to get off work. She walks over to her house again, not wanting to make Regina wait in traffic just to get a few blocks, and well, it's a gorgeous late May day. She might as well get an extra walk in. 

She's not as early this time, only waiting a couple of minutes before Regina turns the corner, a big smile on her face. 

The elevator isn't empty when they go up this time, so they impatiently wait to start kissing until they make it into Regina’s apartment. 

Regina’s grateful the way into her apartment is with a fob, not an actual key. She just taps the door, dragging Cady in behind her by the hand. 

Cady looks absolutely beautiful today. Regina’s heart pretty much stopped as soon as she rounded the corner of the street downstairs. She's wanted nothing more than to make out with her from the moment she laid eyes on her today. 

Okay, well, she does want more than that, but they're taking things at Cady’s pace, so she's patient. Regina knows how to keep her eye on the prize, and practice self restraint. 

It helps that every night this week, after bringing Cady back home, she's come back to her apartment and masturbated furiously , fantasizing about all the things she wants her and Cady to do together. 

They’ll get there. One day. She knows it. 

Cady’s feeling feisty today, so as soon as they enter the apartment and the door is shut behind them, she's pinning Regina against the wall. It seems a bit silly, given the big height difference between them, especially with Regina in heeled boots, but she’s extremely receptive to anything Cady wants to do. 

Cady leans up, meeting their lips in a passionate kiss. She’s standing on her tiptoes, two hands on Regina’s jacket, pinning her against the wall. Regina immediately meets the kiss back, her hands sliding around Cady’s waist and tugging her closer. 

Cady stumbles slightly, unable to hold herself up for that long. Regina grins, pulling back from the kiss. “Let me take off my shoes, baby,” she murmurs, squeezing Cady's waist lightly. “Then it'll be a bit more of an even field.”

Cady pouts, letting go of Regina’s jacket. “Stop being so tall.”

Regina laughs. “No, you would hate that.” She reaches down, undoing the zipper of one boot and tossing it aside, and then the other. “You like how I tower over you.”

“Maybe…”

Regina responds by grabbing Cady’s waist again, tugging her in close. The shorter girl squeaks, suddenly pressed fully up against Regina’s body. 

“You sure about that?” Regina’s got a smug little smile on her face as she looks down at Cady. 

Cady looks up, wide eyed. “I, um…”

Regina leans down, kissing Cady again. Cady responds eagerly, wrapping her arms around the back of Regina’s neck. She still has to lean up, but not on her tiptoes, which is much more comfortable (and sustainable). 

Regina lets her hands explore Cady’s back, over her shirt. She imagines what the skin-on-skin will feel like, the electricity between them noticable.

Cady pulls her head back slightly, and starts kissing down Regina’s jawline. It's a trick she's picked up from mirroring Regina in past make-out sessions. Regina moans as Cady’s lips make their way to her neck, and she can feel Cady’s mouth grin against her. 

Regina tilts her head back slightly, still pushed up against the wall, trying to give Cady more surface area to work with. She wants Cady’s mouth everywhere, all over her. She wants to feel the way she feels against her p-.

“Regina,” Cady says softly, pulling back slightly. 

Regina blinks, trying to come back down to Earth, out of her fantasies. “Wha-?”

“Regina,” Cady repeats, cupping Regina’s cheek with one of her hands. The soft touch grounds her, brings her back to reality.

“Is something wrong?” Regina asks softly. They've stopped every time they've started, but never this early. 

“I…” Cady looks down. “I want…” 

Regina brings up a hand to mirror Cady, cupping her other cheek. “Tell me, baby. What do you want?” 

“I want… more ,” Cady admits, still not making eye contact. “But I'm nervous.” 

Regina’s heart skips a beat. She almost wants to pinch herself. She's not having another wet dream, is she? This is really happening, right? Cady’s asking for more?

Don't get ahead of yourself , she reminds herself. Cady’s pace .

“We can do whatever you want, baby,” Regina tells her. “We can stop at any time and I won't be mad or upset, I promise.” 

“I just… I don't know what I'm supposed to do ,” Cady admits. “I don't really know how this goes.” 

Regina smiles softly, releasing Cady’s cheek and bringing up her other hand to rest on top of Cady’s. “Let's go talk in the bedroom,” she offers. “We can talk about it and if you still want to do more, we can, but if you don't, I won't be mad. I promise.” 

Cady gives a tiny little nod, anxiety clear on her face. Regina takes Cady’s hand and squeezes it lightly, rubbing small circles on the back of it with her thumb. She leads Cady into the bedroom, but doesn't bring her right over to the bed. 

“I'm gonna get changed really quick,” Regina tells her. “I don't like getting into bed with my work clothes on.”

Cady frowns slightly. “Oh, okay.”

“What's wrong?”

Cady’s cheeks turn pink. “I, um…” 

“Baby,” Regina says, stepping forward and taking both of Cady’s hands. “You can tell me. Please, tell me.”

“I really like the way your ass looks in those pants,” Cady says in a rushed near-whisper. Regina's wearing a pair of tight leather pants today, the ones that make Cady’s head spin if she looks for too long.

It takes Regina half a second to process the words, and then she grins. “I’m gonna do something, baby, but I won't stop you if you pull away.”

Cady gives another nod, so Regina steps closer, bringing Cady’s hands around to her rear. It's awkward, but Regina manages to guide Cady’s hands to her ass. Cady gasps, cupping her hands on Regina’s ass cheeks.

Regina smiles. “You can grab my ass anytime you'd like, baby.” 

Cady tilts her head up, meeting Regina in another kiss. She runs her hands all over the smooth leather, letting herself feel every inch of Regina’s incredible ass. Regina makes a delightful little noise as Cady explores, which gives Cady the confidence to squeeze .

Regina moans directly into Cady’s mouth, sending a chill down Cady’s spine. She grips harder, making Regina gasp. 

“Baby,” Regina murmurs, a hungry look in her eyes. “That’s… I like that.”

Cady smiles, palming Regina’s ass again. “Well, you have an incredible ass.”

“Dork,” Regina smiles back, kissing Cady again. Cady squeezes both sides of Regina’s ass at the same time, and the noise Regina makes is almost feral . 

“Okay, okay,” Regina gasps, gently pulling Cady’s hands away from her ass. “I really like that, but we need to talk before it escalates, and I’m about one squeeze away from escalating.” 

Cady blushes. “Sorry.”

“Baby, do not be sorry.” Regina reaches up, cupping Cady’s cheek. “We’re going to spend a lot of time figuring out what the other likes, don’t you worry. I just wanna make sure you’re okay before we keep going.” 

“Okay. Yeah. Makes sense.” Cady struggles to find her words, her cheeks bright red.

Regina grins. “You’re adorable when you’re flustered.” She presses a gentle kiss to Cady’s forehead, leading her over to the bed and gently sitting her down on the edge. “I’ll be right back, okay?”

Cady nods, and watches as Regina slips into her closet. She sits on the edge of the bed, taking deep breaths and trying to calm herself down while she waits for Regina to return. 

Regina emerges a few minutes later, wearing a loose tank top and short shorts that catch Cady’s breath in her throat. Regina smirks, pointedly walking towards the bed with a little more sway in her hips.

“I know you really liked the leather,” Regina says, sitting down next to Cady, “but they can be a pain to get out of, and I wanted to make this as simple as possible today.” 

Cady nods, her heart pounding. Regina takes her hand, rubbing soothing circles on the back with her thumb.

“Hey,” Regina says quietly, “you okay?”

“Yeah,” Cady manages to get out with another nod. “It’s just… very real. All of a sudden.”

Regina brings Cady’s hand up to her mouth, gently kissing her knuckles. “I know, baby, but we’re going to take it slow, okay? Whatever pace you want, and we can stop at any time.” 

Cady nods again. “I know. I just… I don’t really know what to do. I’ve never done this, like, at all.”

Regina tucks a loose piece of hair behind Cady’s ear. “I know, baby. Have you… have you ever touched yourself before?”

Cady gives her a look. “ Yes , Regina. I’ve masturbated. I’m 26 years old and I’ve been single my entire life.” She pauses. “Well, until now, I guess. Right?”

Regina smiles. “Yes, baby. You’re right.” 

“My point is, that’s the only thing I’ve been doing for years ,” Cady sighs. “So I’m at least kind of familiar with myself. But another person? I don’t… I don’t really know what I’m doing.”

“Well, the good news is, if you know what you like, and I know what I like, we can guide each other to do those things,” Regina tells her. “You aren’t going in blind, baby. We have each other.” She takes Cady’s hands again, rubbing with her thumbs gently. “Tell me what you like, baby.”

Cady blushes. “I, um, well, I pretty much only use my fingers.” 

“Okay,” Regina says with a little nod. “Do you, like, watch porn or something, to get yourself in the mood?”

Cady shakes her head. “No, not really. I’ve tried, but it doesn’t really do much for me.” Cady bites her lip, looking down at her lap. “Honestly, I didn’t really do it that often until the last week or so. I don’t really have a super high sex drive. Another side effect of my meds. It’s never really been a concern before, though.” 

Regina tries to fight the tiny smile that’s spreading across her face. “What did you do before the last week, then, when you were in the mood?”

“It’s… embarrassing.” 

“I am not here to judge,” Regina tells her, squeezing her hands gently. “I’m just trying to figure out what kinds of things I can do to make you feel good.” 

Cady sighs, closing her eyes. “Smut.” 

Regina blinks. “What?”

“I read a lot of smut. Romance books. Written porn. Whatever you want to call it.” Cady opens her eyes, looking at Regina’s stunned expression. “See? I told you it was embarrassing.” 

“No, it’s not, I just-.” Regina takes in a sharp breath, centering herself. “It’s just not what I was expecting. Everyone has their own thing, no judgment here.” She kisses Cady’s knuckles again, trying to calm her down. “Is there anything specific you like to read?”

Cady blushes again. “I, um, I…” She closes her eyes, taking in a deep breath. “I can’t even talk about this without getting overwhelmed. How am I supposed to do this?”

“Baby,” Regina says very softly, squeezing both of Cady’s hands. “Can I give you a hug?”

Cady nods, scooting closer to Regina and letting herself be wrapped up in her arms. Regina plants a gentle kiss on the top of Cady’s head, rubbing her back gently. 

“We don’t have to talk about it you don’t want to,” Regina says quietly, “and I wasn’t asking for, like, your deepest darkest fantasy or anything. I just wanted to know what types of things I could do today to help you relax and feel good, that’s all.” 

“I know,” Cady responds. “This just isn’t something I’ve ever talked about with anyone, ever .” She takes a deep breath, closing her eyes. Maybe she can do this if she isn’t looking at Regina. “A lot of the stuff I read is, like, soft , I guess. Like it’s about the romance part as much as it is about the sex, you know? Like, it’s all very gentle and there’s a big emphasis on taking care of the other person.” 

Regina nods. “I can work with that.” She kisses Cady’s forehead again. “I’ll always take care of you, baby.” 

Cady relaxes more with the gentle kiss. “There’s other stuff too, some rougher stuff, but that’s definitely not a today thing.”

“Definitely not,” Regina agrees, “but good to know.” She holds Cady there for another few moments. “Better?”

“Much,” Cady says, pulling back from Regina’s arms. “Thank you.” 

“Of course, baby.” 

“What about you? What do you like?” Cady asks.

Regina smiles softly. “I wanna focus on you today, baby. I can take care of myself.”

Cady frowns. “But that’s not fair.”

“I want to make you feel good today, baby,” Regina tells her. “I want to make sure you’re comfortable and feel good and feel okay with what we’re doing. I can take care of myself after.” 

“But what if I want to make you feel good too?”

Regina smiles. “I know you do, baby. I just don’t want to overwhelm you or make you worry about what you’re doing.”

Cady’s shoulders slump. Yeah, that is a big part of her hesitations. 

“If I take care of myself this time, and show you the things I like, you might feel more confident next time,” Regina explains, “and it’ll be less overwhelming.” 

“What if… we see where I’m at when it comes time for your turn?” Cady offers. “And maybe I can take a more active role that way. Even if it’s not doing it all myself, maybe I can help.”

Regina smiles. “That sounds like a great idea.” The smile turns into more of a sly grin. “Besides, you already help a lot.”

“Really?” Cady asks, her eyes wide. Regina swears she can see a twinkle in them, and it makes her heart melt. 

“Yes, really,” Regina laughs lightly. “I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind since the moment we first kissed.”

Cady’s cheeks blushed pink again. “ Oh .” 

“Is there anything else I can do to help you feel more comfortable? I could dim the lights, put on some music…” Regina trails off.

“I think the lights would be good, but not the music,” Cady says. “It might be too much.”

“You’ve got it, baby.” Regina dips her head down, planting a quick kiss on Cady’s lips. She calls out a command to the smart lights in her room, and they dim to about halfway. “How’s that?”

“Perfect,” Cady replies with a smile. “So, um, how do we do this?” 

Regina smiles back, pulling Cady back in for more deep kisses. She wraps one arm around Cady’s waist, pulling her in close, and brings the other up to Cady’s head, letting her fingers run through her hair. 

Cady lets out a small noise at the sensation, and Regina knows she’s made her first discovery of the night. She cups the back of Cady’s head, massaging her scalp lightly. This gets a tiny moan out of Cady, and Regina’s thrilled. 

Regina pulls back slightly, smiling at her. “I’m going to move us so we’re laying down. Do you wanna be on top or on bottom?”

“I, um, bottom,” Cady says, blushing. 

Regina kisses her forehead. “Okay, baby. If you need me to move off you or stop anything at any point, just tell me, okay?”

“Okay,” Cady nods. 

Regina crawls deeper into the bed, Cady following her lead. She kneels on the side of the center, patting the area next to her. “Come sit first.”

“Okay,” Cady says, and sits directly in front of Regina, kneeling to mirror her. Regina leans forward again, kissing Cady, letting her hands explore her back over her shirt. Regina lets one hand drift down towards Cady’s ass, cupping it lightly. 

“This okay?” Regina whispers between kisses.

Cady nods, squeaking as Regina lightly squeezes. The blush spreads across her face, and Regina kisses her again. 

“My beautiful girl,” Regina whispers, and she feels the way Cady relaxes at her words. Gently, and slowly, she brings her hand up to Cady’s lower back, and begins leaning forward more and more, until she’s gently lowered Cady onto her back on the bed. They stay kissing the entire time, and Cady’s hands have begun to wander again. She doesn’t even seem to notice that they’re laying down now, Regina on top of her.

One of Cady’s hands wanders back down to Regina’s ass, and Regina moans at the pressure of the squeeze. 

“Baby,” Regina says softly, pulling back slightly, “can I take your shirt off?” 

Cady nods, blushing. Regina smiles, leaning down and pecking Cady on the cheek. She starts at the bottom of Cady’s shirt, tugging up gently and slowly, letting her eyes take in every square inch of Cady’s bare stomach. 

Cady has to push up a little bit, to help Regina get the shirt off, and when she does, Regina pulls it up over her bra. It’s definitely not lingerie, but it’s a cute little purple bra that brings a smile to Regina’s lips.

“Cute bra,” she says gently. 

“I know it’s not, like, sexy, or anything,” Cady starts. “I don’t really have anything like th-.”

Regina cuts her off with a gentle kiss. “Baby, it’s okay. I meant it. It’s cute.” She tugs the shirt up further, Cady putting up her arms so Regina can tug the shirt over her head and toss it aside. 

“Can I take yours off?” Cady asks quietly, to which Regina nods. It’s a lot easier for Cady to get Regina’s off, given it’s a tank top and she isn’t laying down, but she still takes her time taking in Regina’s body. She’s literally so hot. Even the simple black bra she’s wearing stirs something within Cady.

“God,” Cady whispers. “You’re so beautiful.” 

Regina smiles softly. “Thank you, baby. So are you.” She lifts up her arms, helping Cady to get rid of the shirt. She leans back down, peppering kisses along Cady’s chin and neck. She’s slow, gentle, running her hands along Cady’s sides while she moves with her mouth. She catalogs everything about how Cady feels beneath her, and the ways she reacts to every touch, every kiss, everything . 

Cady’s hands are busy exploring too. The feeling of Regina’s skin beneath her hands is electric , and she just can’t get enough of it. She sticks to Regina’s stomach, sides, and back, avoiding her bra. She’s so focused on all the sensations, of Regina touching her, of her touching Regina, that her head is completely swimming. She can’t think about anything else. 

Regina continues peppering kisses down Cady’s collarbone, and Cady feels like her whole body is on fire . She feels a hand come up to one of her breasts, palming it over the bra. 

“Is this okay?” Regina asks softly, pulling up from the kisses to look at Cady.

“ Yes ,” Cady moans, grabbing Regina’s other hand and bringing it to her other breast. 

Regina grins, massaging gently with her fingers. Cady tips her head back against the pillow, closing her eyes and moaning. 

“Good girl,” Regina murmurs, and the effect it has on Cady is immediate. She melts completely beneath Regina’s hands, her cheeks turning bright red as her eyes shoot open. Regina smirks at the display. “Oh, you like that? Being my good girl?”

Cady whimpers as she nods, burying her face into Regina’s shoulder. Regina can feel the heat of Cady’s cheeks on her bare skin, but she lets her ride it out there as she continues to massage Cady’s chest. 

“That’s it, baby, I’ve got you,” Regina whispers. She kisses the side of Cady’s head, the only spot she can reach at the moment. “Can I take your bra off, my sweet girl?”

Cady whimpers at the name, nodding against Regina’s shoulder. 

“Hey,” Regina says softly, pulling her hands away from Cady’s chest, running one through Cady’s hair. “You doing okay?” 

“Yes,” Cady breathes back, “it feels so good…” 

Regina smiles. “Good.” She slips one hand behind Cady’s chest, unclipping her bra. Cady reaches an arm around Regina’s back, hesitating above the clip. 

“Can I?”

“Of course, baby,” Regina says. 

Cady struggles for a few moments, and ends up needing to use both hands. Regina just watches her with such soft, gentle eyes that make Cady feel so, so warm. 

They shrug their bras off, and Cady is completely stunned by the sight of Regina’s bare chest. Cady’s always known Regina has incredible boobs. It was one of the first things she noticed about her. (Which, in hindsight, should have been a clue about herself, but Cady pushed that thought aside quickly.)

“Wow,” Cady says. “They’re so… perfect.” 

Regina blushes slightly, before flipping her hair over one shoulder. “Thank you, baby.” 

Cady’s eyes flash down to her own chest, and she’s suddenly very self conscious. She’s definitely on the smaller end of the spectrum, which has never really mattered to her before this very moment.

“Hey,” Regina says softly, catching the way Cady is looking at herself. “ You’re perfect.” She leans down, placing another kiss on Cady’s collarbone. “If it’s too much, let me know, okay?”

“Okay,” Cady replies, her voice breathy. She runs her hands along Regina’s bare back as Regina begins bringing her kisses lower and lower, until she reaches Cady’s chest.

Cady moans at the feeling of Regina’s lips on her boobs, and the way Regina sucks ever so lightly at her skin. Regina brings a hand up, gently playing with one of Cady’s nipples, getting a gasp out of the redhead. 

“Oh my God , that feels good,” Cady moans, and Regina smiles. She lowers her head slightly more again, gently swirling her tongue around Cady’s other nipple while she plays with the first with her fingers.

The effect is immediate. Cady’s back arches, pushing her chest closer to Regina’s hand and mouth. She whimpers with each little flick of Regina’s tongue or rub of her fingers, unraveling beneath her. 

“Good girl,” Regina murmurs against Cady’s nipple. The extra air from the whisper is gentle, yet, Cady’s nipple is so sensitive, it sends her eyes rolling back into her head. 

“ Regina ,” Cady moans, gripping onto Regina’s head with her hands, fingers laced through Regina’s hair. “Don’t stop, please .” 

Regina lets out a throaty chuckle, before sucking slightly harder on Cady’s nipple. Cady gasps, the sensation sending heat through her whole body. She whimpers as Regina’s lips leave her nipple, but they soon find a new home on the other side of her chest. Regina’s other hand comes up, lightly playing with the wet nipple, as she gets to work with her tongue on the other one. 

“ Regina ,” Cady moans, and it's the most beautiful sound Regina’s ever heard. She sucks harder, Cady’s back arching up against her face, as she tugs on Regina’s hair. It’s not a very hard tug, but it sends heat straight down to Regina’s core. 

Regina pulls back, panting as she looks up at Cady’s face. Cady is catching her breath, her hands still tangled in Regina’s hair, but no longer pulling. She looks up at Regina with half-lidded eyes. 

“You doing okay?” Regina asks softly, caressing Cady’s face with her hand. 

“Okay?” Cady murmurs, her voice turning up as if it were a question. “Baby, I… that was great .”

Regina grins. “Good girl.”

Cady whimpers, biting her lip as she blushes. “I… I like that.”

“I can tell, sweet girl,” Regina says, situating herself further up so she’s eye level with Cady again, who has finally let go of her hair. She leans in, meeting Cady’s lips in a gentle kiss, a brief one. “I want to take your pants off, baby. Is that okay?” 

Cady nods. “ Please .”

Regina rolls off of her, unbuttoning Cady’s jeans and pulling them down. Cady lifts her rear up helpfully, so Regina can get them down over her ass. 

“Good girl,” Regina says softly, pushing one of Cady’s hips back down gently to lower her back onto the bed. “I’m gonna take good care of you, my sweet girl,” she continues, as she gently pulls off each pant leg. Her eyes wander back up to Cady’s underwear, a matching set to her bra. She looks up at Cady and smiles. 

“Cute panties,” Regina tells her, and this time, Cady doesn't try to defend herself. 

“Thanks,” Cady replies, blushing. “Can I, um, can I take your shorts off?” 

“Sure, but only if you want to,” Regina says gently. “I don't want you to feel pressured into reciprocating anything tonight.” 

“I just want to look at you,” Cady admits. “All of you. You're so beautiful.” 

Regina’s heart melts at how genuine Cady is. Regina’s had her fair share of lovers over the years, and a slew of one night stands, back in New York, but she's never had sweet foreplay like this before. It makes her heart swell in such a gentle way, and, somehow, has turned her on completely. 

Maybe that's just because it's Cady , the definition of sweetness and adoration. Maybe it's because it's the girl that Regina has wanted the longest, years of regret replaced with gentle caresses and soft words. 

Regina guides Cady’s hands to her hips, and Cady gently tugs down her shorts. Regina’s underwear doesn't exactly match her bra, but they are both black. The panties are actually lacier, and the sight of Regina in them makes Cady’s breath hitch. 

“ So beautiful ,” Cady murmurs as Regina tugs the shorts off, one leg at a time. She situates herself on top of Cady again, meeting their lips in a gentle, sweet kiss. 

“I'm going to touch you over your panties, okay?” Regina asks, and Cady nods. “I’m gonna go nice and slow, so you let me know when you need more, okay?” Cady nods again. 

Regina dips a hand down, trailing gentle touches along Cady’s hip bones. She lets her fingers dance along the hem of her underwear for a few seconds, watching the way Cady’s breath hitches and her eyes go wide. 

Regina drops her hand lower, trailing two fingers down across Cady's underwear, feeling how soaked they've gotten. 

“You’re so wet,” Regina murmurs, leaning her head in close to Cady’s ear. “You completely soaked through your underwear.” 

Cady whimpers and moans at the slow fingers trailing up and down on top of her underwear. “Y-you feel so good.” 

Regina kisses the side of Cady’s head. “You respond so well to my touch,” Regina praises. “My very good girl, completely soaked through, just for me.”

“ Yes ,” Cady moans. “All for you.” 

Regina pulls her head back, so she can be closer to Cady’s face. She leans in, kissing Cady, as she picks up the pace of her fingers every so slightly, still just trailing on top of the underwear, not going in.

“ Regina ,” Cady moans between kisses. “ Please .”

“Please what, my sweet girl?” 

“ Please. I need it.”

“Use your words, babygirl. Tell me what you need.” 

Cady moans at the pet names and the touches. “I need you to touch me. Please .”

“I am touching you,” Regina says with a little smirk. Sure, they're being gentle and soft, but Regina loves to tease. 

Cady shoots her a look. “Take off my underwear and fuck me. ” 

Regina is momentarily stunned by the language from Cady, but then she smirks again. She pulls her hand back, grabbing the top of Cady’s underwear and pulling them down. Cady kicks her legs, trying to get the infernal clothing off of her. 

“Easy, baby,” Regina says softly. “Let me take care of you.” She slides off of Cady for a moment, carefully removing Cady’s underwear and tossing them aside. Her eyes drift up to Cady’s glistening pussy, and she honestly moans . 

Every fiber of Regina’s being wants to dive in, tongue first, and eat Cady out. But that's probably too much for today. Cady’s been doing so good. She doesn't want to overwhelm her and ruin it now. 

“My good girl,” Regina says, situating herself next to Cady. “So wet for me.”

“Get back on top of me,” Cady whimpers. “Feels good.”

Regina raises an eyebrow, but does what Cady wants. She returns to the position she was in before, her right hand dipped down, trailing over Cady’s exposed pussy.

Cady moans at the featherlight touch, Regina’s fingers gliding over her lips. “ Please ,” Cady moans. “ Please, Regina .”

“Since you asked so nicely, my sweet girl.” Regina slowly inserts her pointer finger, gentle and careful. It's fairly easy, given how completely wet Cady is. She feels the way Cady clenches around her, and sees the way Cady’s whole body reacts. 

“Oh my God ,” Cady moans, and Regina begins to pump. Her movements are deliberate and calculated, testing every stroke and curl to see the ways Cady reacts to each of them. She's a whimpering and moaning mess beneath Regina, and Regina can't help but think she's never looked more beautiful. 

“More,” Cady croaks out, grasping at Regina’s back. 

“You want another finger, babygirl?” Regina asks. 

Cady nods. “ Please .”

“Are you sure?”

“ Please !” Cady moans as Regina curls her single finger inside her. “I-I use two,” she manages to stammer out.

That's enough for Regina, who slips her middle finger inside, hearing the most beautiful moan escape Cady’s lips and feeling Cady clench around her fingers. Regina immediately pumps with both fingers, curling them up to hit the sweet spot that makes Cady’s back arch.

Regina begins to rub Cady’s clit with the palm of her hand, using smooth and deliberate movements. Cady bucks her hips and moans, gasping for air. 

“That's it, my good girl,” Regina says sweetly. “Cum for me, my good girl.” 

Cady can't talk, can't think, can't breathe , but oh God , does it feel so good. Regina’s words swirl around in her brain. Regina’s touch feels like heaven . Regina is in front of her, so beautiful, so perfect, so everything . 

“ Regina! ” Cady cries out, the orgasm rocking through her body as she flies over the edge. Regina keeps pumping, whispering praise over and over, only slowing when the aftershocks begin to slow too. 

Cady is flat against the mattress, head swimming, panting and trying to catch her breath, as Regina carefully and slowly removes her fingers. Regina brings her fingers up to her mouth, making a point to slowly and deliberately suck all of Cady’s juices off her fingers. Cady watches her with half lidded eyes, only able to murmur out, “You're so hot.”

Regina pulls the fingers out of her mouth with a pop , smiling down at Cady. She curls up on Cady's side, pulling Cady in close. Cady immediately finds her place snuggled in Regina’s arms, still struggling to catch her breath. 

“You did so good, baby,” Regina praises, rubbing circles on Cady’s back. “So, so good.”

“Me?” Cady whispers, her voice raspy from the moaning. “You were incredible . That was… wow.”

Regina chuckles, planting a kiss on Cady’s forehead. “Let me go get you some water, babygirl.” 

Cady protests momentarily, trying to cling, but Regina plants another gentle kiss on her forehead and runs her fingers through Cady’s hair. She relaxes at the touch, and as soon as she does, Regina rolls over and climbs off the bed at lightning speed. 

“No fair!” Cady pouts. 

“Be right back!” Regina runs out her bedroom door, ignoring the pouting girl in her bed. She returns a few moments later with a big tumbler of water, one with a lid and a straw. Regina crawls back into bed next to her, water in hand. “Sit up, sweet girl.”

“I don't think my legs work,” Cady replies, her voice still hoarse. 

Regina chuckles, putting the water down on the beside table, and helping Cady to sit up against the headboard next to her. She holds the water cup for Cady, who chugs several big sips through the straw. When she pulls away, she clears her throat, which instantly feels better. 

“Thank you,” Cady says quietly as Regina chugs some of the water before putting it back on the bedside table. 

“Of course, baby,” Regina replies, opening her arms wide. Cady crawls right into them, curling up in Regina’s lap, resting her head against Regina’s bare chest. 

They sit in silence for a few minutes, Cady catching her breath and listening to Regina’s heartbeat. Regina runs her hands up and down Cady’s back soothingly, resting her chin on the top of Cady's head. 

“How’re you feeling, sweet girl?” Regina asks after a few minutes. 

“ Incredible ,” Cady replies, nuzzling into Regina’s chest. “Genuinely, I've never… it's never felt that good. Ever .”

Regina chuckles, pressing a kiss to the top of Cady’s head. “I'm so glad, baby.” 

Cady tilts her head up, looking at Regina as best she can from her current angle. “What about you? What can I do for you?” 

“Baby, you've already done plenty,” Regina assures her. “You’re so incredibly hot.” 

Cady frowns. “But I want to make you feel good too.”

“Let's give it a few more minutes.” Regina tightens her grip on Cady, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “I still don't want to overwhelm you.”

Cady smiles softly. “You're so sweet.” 

“Only for you, my sweet girl.”

“ God , I like that.”

Regina chuckles. “I can tell. I learned a lot about the pet names you like today.” 

Cady nuzzles into Regina’s chest. “Are there any pet names you like?” 

Regina shrugs lightly. “I'm not sure. It usually depends more on the person saying them, which means I'll probably like anything you call me.” 

“Anything, huh? Sure thing, sweet schnookims.” 

Regina pushes Cady off of her, Cady laughing as she rolls over onto the mattress. “Absolutely not ,” Regina says, flopping down next to Cady. 

“You said anything ,” Cady teases. 

“I take it back,” Regina laughs. She looks at Cady, who's still laughing to herself. “God, you go from being so incredibly hot to so impossibly adorable in seconds. How is that possible?” 

“Says literal Aphrodite herself,” Cady retorts. 

Regina blushes. “Baby…” 

“It's true.” Cady reaches up, tucking a piece of hair behind Regina’s ear. “You're the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. You're perfect.”

Regina’s cheeks go from pink to bright red. “That's very sweet, baby, but I’m far from it.”

Cady cups Regina’s cheek. “You’re perfect to me.” 

Regina can feel the tears welling up in her eyes. She blinks rapidly, looking up at the ceiling. She’s determined not to cry right now.

“Baby,” Cady says softly, scooting closer to her. “What’s wrong?”

“I…” Regina sighs, still staring at the ceiling, trying to stop the tears. “I don’t deserve you.”

Cady grabs Regina by the shoulders, pulling her towards her. “Don’t say that,” she says softly, rubbing Regina’s back. “You deserve to be happy.”

Regina blinks, swallowing back a sob. She doesn’t say anything else, just buries herself into Cady’s shoulder, and lets herself focus on the feeling of Cady’s hand on her back. It’s grounding, relaxing. Regina gets it now, why Cady craves physical touch so much. It keeps her here, not spiraling into her own thoughts. 

Regina lets herself absorb the feeling of Cady’s skin against her own, the warmth and safety of being held in her arms. She stays there for several minutes, just focusing on breathing through it. 

“Sorry,” Regina says at last. “I don’t know what came over me there.” 

Cady leans up, kissing Regina gently. “Don’t apologize, baby. It’s okay.” She keeps rubbing Regina’s back, in big, soothing circles. “If you’re still feeling up to it, I’d like to make you feel good.”

Regina smiles softly at Cady. “Thank you, baby, but I don’t think I’m feeling up for it right now.”

“That’s okay,” Cady replies. “If you change your mind, you know where I’ll be.” She smirks lightly. 

Regina smiles back. “Do you mind if we order in instead of going out? I don’t know about you, but I don’t want to put on any more real clothes tonight.”

“Me neither,” Cady replies. “Besides, pretty sure my legs still don’t work.” 

Regina burst out laughing, pulling Cady closer to her, rolling over so she’s on her back, and Cady is laying on top of her. Cady squeaks, but doesn’t fight it, snuggling into Regina’s chest once they’re settled again. 

“Mmm,” Cady hums. “Comfy.”

Regina plants a kiss on the top of Cady’s head. “Good. I don’t know about you, but I need a nap.”

“Me too,” Cady sighs. “You sure you’re okay with me falling asleep on you?”

Regina holds her tighter. “ Duh . You’re, like, a cuddly koala. You’re gonna end up clinging to me anyways, so might as well make it comfy for us both from the start.” 

Cady giggles. “I do tend to cling, don’t I?”

“It’s adorable,” Regina tells her, “and I love it. So don’t you ever stop.” 

Cady settles into her spot, getting comfortable on top of Regina. “Don’t have to tell me twice.” She yawns, her eyelids fluttering. “Hey, Gina?”

“Yes, baby?”

“I meant what I said. You’re perfect to me.”

Regina smiles softly, running a hand through Cady’s hair. “I’m glad you think so baby.”

“Don’t think so,” Cady murmurs, half asleep. “Know so.”

And just like that, she’s out like a light. Regina can hear her breathing even out. As quietly as she can, she calls out a command to her smart light to turn off the lights, and by some odd stroke of luck, the device listens. It takes several minutes, but Regina starts to drift off too, warm and happy, with Cady curled up on her chest.

Chapter Text

Saturday morning rolls around, and Cady is determined to still have a good weekend. 

The night before had been fun. Intense, but incredible . They’d napped for a while, wrapped up in each other’s arms, until it was time for dinner. Regina ordered them some Thai food, which Cady hungrily gobbled down, her energy spent, even after her nap. 

They cuddled on the couch after dinner, watching a couple episodes of a TV show, before Regina brought Cady back home. She headed to bed early, still exhausted from the evening activities. 

Now, Saturday morning, Cady’s back at work, with coworkers who are apparently still mad at her about her little speech last week about not coming here to make friends. She doesn’t really understand why they’re so upset about that. It’s true. She comes here to work, not to make friends. She doesn’t see herself having anything in common with most of her coworkers anyway, so, what’s the point?

She doesn’t let it bother her, really. She just goes about her shift, ignoring the snide comments from the coworkers who took offense, and thinking about the afternoon and evening she has planned. 

When the end of her shift finally rolls around, she hurries home, excited for her afternoon. Her mom is home, packing for her upcoming trip, laundry all over the living room.

“Hey!” Cady greets upon entering the apartment. She shrugs off her bag, leaving it on its hook near the door. 

“Hi! How was work?” Betsy asks, folding a shirt into her suitcase. 

Cady shrugs. “Same old.” She looks at the clothing explosion in their small living room. “How’s packing going?”

“I’ve somehow lost every single item I wanted to bring,” Betsy sighs, “which is why I’m doing it early.” She stuffs the shirt into her bag. “Well, that, and then tomorrow, we can just spend the day together and not worry about it!”

Cady smiles softly. “That’ll be nice. Sorry I can’t stay to help.”

Betsy waves her hand. “Go shower. Do you know where you’re going tonight?”

“Some Italian place downtown that Gretchen really likes. Karen’s very excited for our first double date .” Cady shrugs. “I don't really see how it's that different from last week.”

“Well, I hope you all have fun,” Betsy says. 

“Thanks!” Cady heads off into her room, to get ready for her shower, so she can head to Regina’s to get ready for dinner. 

It's crazy how different today is from just one week ago. Betsy will still occasionally make a face, but she hasn't made one single negative comment about Regina all week. She's even said a few positive things about Regina, here and there. 

If this is Cady’s new normal, she can certainly get used to this.

Cady heads to Regina’s after her shower. Much like last week, she needs an outfit that's appropriate for the venue, and Regina informed her days ago she’d have options for her. 

That was, of course, after requesting all of Cady’s exact clothing sizes. Regina had even taken some measurements earlier in the week. Cady goes along with it under the condition that Regina not spend too much per outfit, although she doesn't exactly set a hard limit. 

Cady knows that no matter what, Regina is going to buy her clothes for these kinds of things. They’ll run out of options in Regina’s closet eventually, especially given how awkwardly most of Regina’s clothes fit her these days. 

Cady walks to Regina’s, wanting to enjoy the warm weather and fresh air, thinking about the evening they had spent with Regina wrapping measuring tape around various parts of Cady's body, and how close they had been. Sure, it was nothing compared to last night, but it felt extremely intimate in a very different way. 

Cady arrives at Regina’s apartment, head swimming in memories. She manages to remember to actually text Regina now that she's here, so she can be let in. 

Regina comes down to get her, even though, realistically, she could just buzz her in. No, that won't do. She greets Cady at the front door with a smile, taking her hand and leading her through the lobby. 

The elevators are empty today, so they’re able to kiss on the way up. Regina pulls Cady in for a tight hug, as Cady wraps her arms around Regina’s middle, feeling so at home in her arms. 

They don't pull away until the elevator reaches Regina’s floor. Regina takes Cady’s hand until they get to her apartment, leading her inside before they start kissing again. 

After several more minutes of just making out in the foyer, Cady pulls back slightly. 

“Hi,” she says breathily.

“Hi, baby,” Regina replies, and it makes Cady’s heart flutter. 

“We should, um, probably get ready,” Cady points out, unable to stop herself from smiling up at Regina. 

Regina sighs dramatically. “I guess . I am excited to see you try on the stuff I have picked out for you.” 

Cady lets herself be led into Regina’s bedroom, where she deposits her bag before heading into the closet. Regina has several options on a rack for her, and is wringing her hands together nervously. 

“In theory, these are options for the next several Girls’ Nights,” Regina tells her. “If there's any you really hate, I can bring them back to work and get something else.”

“Wait, back to work?” Cady asks, raising an eyebrow. She pulls the first item off the rack, and looks at the label. “Regina - did you design these ?” 

“I, um, yeah. I did. I designed them for you.”

Cady gawks at her. “I thought I knew about all the projects you'd been working on lately?” 

“Um, these are a little bit older,” Regina admits, her cheeks flushing pink. 

Cady blinks. “When did you do these?” 

“I'm gonna sound crazy.”

“Please?”

Regina drops her head a little, avoiding eye contact. “Um, would you find it extremely weird to know that a lot of the work I did in the coffee shop during the five months before we talked was on these?”

Cady stares at her for a long moment, before quickly putting the item back on the rack. She surges forward, tackling Regina in a kiss.

Regina stumbles back, catching herself on a shelf behind her. She’s stunned for a moment by the kiss, before kissing back. She's still a bit confused by the reaction, but she’s not complaining. 

“You giant softie,” Cady says when she finally comes up for air. “I can't believe you.”

Regina blushes deeper, moving her head so her hair partially blocks her face. “I, um, still plan on releasing them as products eventually. I just thought they should go on the intended model first. So I had a couple options tailored to your measurements this week.”

Cady pushes Regina’s hair back out of her face, tucking it behind one of Regina’s ears. “Baby,” Cady says softly, “don't hide. This is literally so sweet.”

“I'm glad you think so,” Regina laughs lightly. “I was a little nervous you'd think I'm insane.”

“Oh, you're insane,” Cady replies with a laugh of her own, “but not for this.”

“Hey!”

Cady kisses Regina again, and any complaints cease instantly. After several long seconds, she pulls back, heart pounding, catching her breath, as she looks directly into Regina’s eyes. 

“I love you.”

The words leave her mouth before she processes what they are. Her eyes go wide, just as Regina’s do. 

“I love you too,” Regina replies, a smile on her face. 

Cady can't help but smile back. “So much for going slow.”

“We made it a whole week from the first kiss,” Regina points out. “That's, like, a decade in lesbian time.”

Cady looks at her, confused. “What?” 

“...do you know what a U-Haul lesbian is?” 

Cady blinks. “No…?”

Regina just smiles wider and laughs. “You dork. Start trying on some of these outfits and I'll explain.” 

Cady stays there for an extra moment, before leaning up and giving Regina one more quick kiss. “Okay, now I'm ready.”

It only takes one outfit for Regina to finish explaining her joke. Cady does find it funny that they'd followed the stereotype a bit, even if she's still a bit lost on some parts of it. 

There's a total of four outfits for Cady to try on. She gives her honest feedback in-between each outfit. Two of them, she vetoes entirely. One, she vetoes as soon as she touches the fabric, before she even puts it on. She snatches her hand back as soon as she feels it, as if she's just touched fire. She wipes her hand on her leg, trying to get rid of the sensation left over. 

“Sorry,” Cady says at Regina’s confused look. “I have… a lot of weird stuff with textures. That’s… a very bad texture.”

Regina frowns, feeling the fabric. “I mean, it's silk. It's super smooth.” 

Cady gives a pained look. “I…” She closes her eyes, taking a deep breath. “I know. I just hate silk. It catches on my skin weird and it makes me feel like… I don't know how to describe it. It's just bad .” 

Regina, still puzzled, takes the outfit off the rack. “Okay, no silk. Got it.” 

“Sorry,” Cady says, opening her eyes. “I know you worked really hard on all of these.” 

Regina waves a hand. “Don't apologize. I knew there was a chance they wouldn't all be hits.” 

“Yeah, but…” Cady bites her lip. “Okay, there's something I need to tell you. Something I've been wanting to tell you for a while, but I just… didn't know how you'd take it.” 

Regina blinks. She puts the outfit on a different rack, before stepping up to Cady and taking her hands. “You can tell me anything, baby.” 

“I know,” Cady sighs, avoiding eye contact. “I just… I knew I needed to tell you at some point, I just…” 

“Baby, just tell me.” Regina’s getting nervous now. They've been extremely honest with each other so far. Hell, they even said I love you not twenty minutes ago. What could Cady have possibly been keeping from her?

Cady closes her eyes again, taking another deep breath. “I’m autistic.” 

Regina stares at her, blinking. “What?” 

“I’m autistic,” Cady repeats, opening up her eyes. She's still not looking directly at Regina. “It's why I'm so… specific about certain things. Like textures. And touch. And really bad with social cues and stuff. And if I get too overstimulated, I have meltdowns. I get super excited about certain things, like animals, and will talk about them for hours if people let me. When I get too excited, I have to bounce and shake and give myself stimulation to get it out of my system.” 

“I'm confused,” Regina admits. “Why were you worried about telling me this?”

Cady finally looks at her face. Regina does look genuinely confused, but there's no signs of negativity, as far as Cady can tell. “People can be… weird about autism.” 

“What do you mean?” 

Cady sighs. “I got diagnosed when I was in one of my programs. I got super overstimulated during an experimental therapy session and ended up having a meltdown, which, admittedly, I hadn't had since I was a kid. One of my clinicians noticed some signs after that had been previously dismissed as a result of being homeschooled and what not. They recommended an evaluation, and, well, the hunch was correct.” 

“Wouldn't that be… a good thing? Finding out what's going on?” Regina asks, confused by the look on Cady’s face. 

“In some ways,” Cady agrees with a little nod. “But not all the time. Having that diagnosis has made things… harder, with some professionals. I've got good providers now, but there were a few in one of the programs who treated me like I was never going to be able to take care of myself because of it.” She frowns at the memory. “It was… really bad, for a little while there. One of them wanted my mother to take guardianship over me, even though I was already an adult. He claimed I'd never be able to live on my own or make important decisions for myself.”

Regina makes a face. “What the fuck?” 

Cady lets out a tiny laugh. “Yeah, exactly. Look, I know it shouldn't be a big deal, but for some people in my life, it has been.” She looks down at the ground. “I just… I knew I needed to tell you, eventually, but I was just… I didn't know how you'd react.”

“How did you think I was gonna react?”

Cady gives a half shrug. “I mean, I was hopeful it'd be positive, but I just… I don't know. I don't know how much you knew or what your experiences with it were. Sometimes people hear autism and just start infantilizing.” She looks back down at the ground. “Part of me was worried you wouldn't want to deal with it and be with me anymore.”

Regina grabs Cady’s waist, pulling her in close for a hug. She squeaks as she's tugged forward, but quickly settles into Regina’s arms. 

“Baby,” Regina says softly, “I love you . That means everything about you. And I'll admit. I don't know much about this. But I can learn.” She kisses the top of Cady's head, which is pressed up against her shoulder. “Thank you for telling me.”

“I love you too,” Cady replies, glancing up at Regina. The words ground her, along with the feeling of Regina’s arms around her. “I'm sorry it took me so long to tell you.”

“Don't be sorry.” Another kiss to the top of the head. “I mean, honestly, most of this stuff, I already knew about you. Except for the textures thing. And the meltdowns. But the rest? All stuff I already knew. All parts of you I already fell in love with.” 

“And I know we keep throwing around the love word, and I know we’ve already established that we’re moving a bit faster than we expected,” Regina continues, “but I mean it. I've had a lot of feelings for you, for a very long time. Well before I knew what to do with those feelings. Having you back in my life has been the best thing to happen to me in these ten years.” She squeezes Cady tighter. “I realized I loved you the night you had me read you to sleep. Which is crazy, I know, because that was literally before we even kissed.”

“It's not crazy,” Cady butts in. “I realized on our first date.”

Regina smiles at her. “God, we’re hopeless.”

Cady laughs lightly. “We are.”

“I mean it, though. I fell in love with you , Cady Heron. And that means all parts of you. I fell in love with most of the things you just listed. I just didn't know there was a name for it all. And the stuff I didn't know, I'm glad I know now, so I can help if stuff comes up.” Regina reached up, running a hand through Cady’s hair. “I'm sorry you worried about this.”

“It's not your fault,” Cady sighs, leaning into the touch of fingers in her hair. “Other people have made me cautious about telling people.” 

“Those providers, they aren't working with you anymore, right?” 

Cady shakes her head. “God, no. All my providers now are really good about it.”

Regina plants another kiss on Cady’s head. “Good. I'm glad.” She sighs, breathing in honeysuckle and vanilla. “How's this? You can try on what's left of the outfits, and you can tell me about the textures and fabrics you know you like and which ones you know you don't like, so I can use that for the future.”

Cady looks up at her again. “You're gonna make more designs?” 

Regina smiles. “Of course I am, baby. I have my own personal muse now. I'm constantly thinking about outfits that highlight your beauty.”

Cady blushes, burying her face into Regina’s shoulder. Regina chuckles, rubbing her back soothingly. 

“It's true,” Regina says. “Besides, now I have a fun challenge. I get to make clothes that are stylish and comfortable for you. Well, obviously, comfort is always a factor in design, but it tends to take a backseat once you hit a certain level,” Regina begins to over explain. “Bringing it back to the forefront is going to be a challenge, but one I’m excited for.” 

Cady leans up, meeting Regina's mouth for a kiss. “I love you.”

“I love you too.”

“It's gonna take a long time for me to get tired of saying it.”

Regina smiles softly at her. “I don't think I ever will.” 

The final outfit left ends up being the winner for the evening, and the pair spend the rest of the afternoon getting ready. Regina takes a much more prominent role in pampering Cady this time, which Cady happily accepts. She does Cady’s hair and makeup, meticulous and gentle. She wants to paint Cady’s nails, but Cady has to say no to that. She's not allowed to paint her nails as part of her uniform for her job. 

“It's because the paint could chip into the drinks,” Cady explains. “I do miss it, though.” 

Regina puts the basket of nail polish away. “That makes sense. Maybe one day.”

“Yeah,” Cady sighs. “Maybe one day.”

“Have you… put any thought into what you might want to do next? Like, if you weren't a barista anymore.”

Cady shrugs. “I've thought about it. I don't know, honestly. I feel like I want to try to go back to school, but that's also… very scary.”

“Like, community college?”

Cady nods. “Yeah. I'd start there. Probably get an Associate’s in something , and then if I wanted more, move onto a Bachelor's. That's a lot of time and money I don't really have, though. And I don't even know what I want to do. I just know I don't wanna be a barista forever.”

Regina smiles. “I don't blame you. Well, we’ve got plenty of time to figure it out.”

“Yeah,” Cady sighs again. “I just… I feel like the longer I wait and drag this out, the worse it gets.”

“Baby, there's no rush. Everyone goes at their own pace.” Regina puts a hand on Cady’s. “I'm gonna tell you this with the knowledge that Karen regularly talks about this, so it's not like I'm disclosing a big secret.”

Cady raises an eyebrow. “Uh, okay?”

“It took Karen eight years to finish her Bachelor’s degree,” Regina tells her. “She started as a full time student, with Gretchen and I. By halfway through our sophomore year, she switched to part time. She took it nice and slow after that. She ended up finishing in the last possible semester before her credits started expiring.”

“Really?”

Regina nods. “It took her a little while to figure out her dyslexia. It took even longer for her to figure out what accommodations worked for her. One of those things was doing less classes at a time so she could stay on top of the work better, since it took her a lot longer to get through stuff than it does most people.” 

“We were so proud of her when she finished. She had a lot of shame about it at first, but Gretch and I did a lot to support her and boost her up about it.” Regina sits up a little straighter, proud. “She’s at a point now where she's proud that she powered through and got the degree, and talks openly about it online and stuff. She's all about reducing stigmas.” 

“She's literally the most wholesome person in the world,” Cady smiles. “ I’m proud of her.”

“Everyone should be. And eventually, if you decide to go back, we’ll do whatever we can to support you and cheer you on a long the way, and I’ll be so goddamn proud of you.” 

“I'll think about it. I don't wanna make any big decisions until after my birthday.”

“Of course,” Regina says, squeezing Cady's hand. “Just think about it, you know?” 

“I will,” Cady promises. “I will.”

As soon as Regina finishes Cady's makeup, she gets started on her own. They're a bit behind schedule, so Gretchen and Karen end up coming over while they wait for Regina to finish getting ready. Both of them are ecstatic to see Cady in her new outfit, both having seen earlier versions of the design on paper at work. Cady keeps them occupied with conversation in the living room while Regina finishes getting ready in her bedroom. 

When Regina finally emerges, Gretchen literally gasps. 

“Oh my gosh, stop . You two are too cute, all matching and stuff! I have got to get a picture of you two!” 

“That’s fine, but don’t put it on Insta yet,” Regina tells her. “Trying to hold off a bit longer on the big reveal.”

“Of course!” Gretchen agrees. “Come on, get in close!” Gretchen takes the picture, showing it to Karen first. 

“Oh my god, you guys are so cute !” Karen squeals. 

“Can I see?” Cady asks. Gretchen shows the picture to both Cady and Regina. Cady feels Regina squeeze her side lightly. 

“ Stop , that’s adorable. Text that to both of us,” Regina says, and Gretchen nods, grinning. Cady pulls her phone out of her clutch, just in time to see the message from Gretchen in their group chat pop up.

Gretchen - 5:34pm

“I’m making this my phone background,” Cady announces as she downloads the photo. 

Regina grins. “You’re finally getting rid of the default background?”

“Well, I haven’t had anything worthy of it before,” Cady says. “But I’d say this is pretty much perfect.”

Regina leans down, capturing Cady’s lips in a gentle kiss. 

“D’awww,” Gretchen coos. “They’re so cute!” 

Regina flips her off, getting a laugh from both her and Karen. When she pulls back from Cady, she shoots her friends a look. “You have no idea the kind of payback you’re in for.” 

Karen raises an eyebrow. “Payback?”

“Over four years of you two being the most nauseatingly cute couple on the planet,” Regina clarifies. She wraps an arm tight around Cady’s shoulders. “We’re gonna give you guys a run for your money.” 

“I don’t know,” Gretchen hums. “Cady might. You?” She makes a non-committal hand gesture. “To be determined.”

Regina lets out a dramatic gasp, putting her free hand over her heart. “Gretchen Wieners! E tu, Brute?” 

Cady bursts out laughing, as does Karen. “You’re so dramatic,” Cady giggles, leaning against Regina. 

“I’ve been betrayed!” 

“You can go be betrayed in the Uber,” Cady tells her. “It should be here soon.” She looks to Karen, who recovers from her laughter to nod, glancing at her phone.

“Five minutes out!” Karen announces. 

Gretchen and Karen leave Regina’s apartment first, Regina and Cady a few feet behind. Regina still has an arm wrapped around Cady’s shoulders, and the two walk pressed up against each other. 

“I’ve got your back, Caesar,” Cady says softly, a smile on her face. 

Regina grins back at her. “I know you do.” 

Dinner that night is definitely the fanciest meal they’ve had together so far. Cady doesn’t feel nearly as out of place anymore, although the prices are still enough to give her a heart attack. She knows Regina will still cover her bill, but she still goes out of her way to try to order something on the cheaper end of things. 

Key word being try . 

The restaurant is apparently an Italian steakhouse , which meant that the prices were extremely high. Gretchen launches into a spiel about how good their steak is here, and how Cady has to try some, which makes her nervous. 

The cheapest steak is $40, which is more than Cady has ever spent on any meal, ever . 

Regina takes her hand under the table and squeezes it lightly. “Baby, get whatever you want. I’ve got your bill,” she says softly, while Gretchen and Karen are distracted with a separate conversation. 

Cady squeezes back. “I know,” she replies quietly. “These are just… so expensive.” 

“Don’t worry about it,” Regina assures her. “ Seriously . It’s not a problem.” 

Cady swallows and nods, looking back down at the menu.

Regina’s hand doesn’t leave hers until the food arrives. 

Cady admits that the steak is delicious. She ended up getting the physically smallest steak on the menu, a 6oz filet mignon, which was still over $50. She’s trying very hard not to think too hard about it. 

Aside from the price anxiety, dinner is a great time. The food is delicious, the company is fantastic, and the restaurant even has a non-alcoholic wine option for Cady. The other three are sharing a bottle of wine, but Regina only has two glasses throughout the course of dinner. Still, as the night goes on, Cady keeps catching Regina looking at her with big, loving eyes. Every time, Cady blushes and looks away, but Regina doesn’t. 

Gretchen and Karen are a little too drunk and in love with each other to notice, but Cady certainly does. It’s so sweet, it makes her want to melt into Regina’s arms, right then and there. 

They aren’t particularly close to the Riverwalk, and there isn’t really anywhere nice to walk around nearby, so they decide to Uber home after dinner. Cady is torn between wanting to stay with Regina tonight and wanting to go home, knowing it’s the last night her mother will be in the apartment for a week. Regina encourages her to spend the time with her mom, promising they’ll have plenty of opportunities in the future. 

The Uber drops Cady off first, Regina kissing her goodbye in the middle row of the oversized SUV, getting drunken “ Aww ”s from the peanut gallery in the back row. Once she’s in her building and the Uber heads towards the luxury building the other three live in, Regina leans back in her seat and sighs. 

Gretchen reaches forward, putting a hand on Regina’s shoulder. “You’re really in love with her, aren’t you?”

“I am,” Regina sighs, a smile on her face. “And she’s in love with me too.”

Karen squeals. “Oh, I love love !” 

Regina chuckles at her drunken friends, putting a hand over Gretchen’s and squeezing gently. “You guys are the best. Thanks for being so open to having her around again.”

“G, of course ,” Gretchen squeezes Regina’s shoulder. “I’m so glad things are working out.”

“Me too!” Karen claps her hands together. “Can we be in the wedding?”

“Look I know we moved fast, but we’re not going that fast !” Regina huffs. 

“But when the time comes?”

Regina sighs. “Yes, Karen. You two can be in the wedding. But we better be in yours!” 

Gretchen blushes, but Karen looks at her excitedly. “Oh, we should do that?”

Gretchen blinks. “Get married?” Her face is bright red now. Regina can see it in the rearview mirror.

“Yeah!” 

Regina stares out the window chuckling to herself. “You two should have this conversation sober .” 

Karen frowns. “But where’s the fun in that?”

Cady gets home that night to find her mother in her usual spot, relaxing on the couch, watching TV. Her suitcase is packed up neatly, and the mess of clothes from earlier is gone. Betsy looks up from the couch, taken aback for a moment by her daughter's appearance. 

“Wow,” Betsy says. “You look stunning .”

“Thanks,” Cady smiles. “Regina designed this for me .” She gestures at the outfit, grinning from ear to ear. 

Betsy blinks. “ For you ?”

Cady nods. “And several more outfits.” 

“Well, she's certainly committed.”

“She is,” Cady sighs. “What’re you watching?” 

Betsy shrugs. “Nothing good on, so just some reruns. How was Girls’ Night?” 

“Really fun. Let me go get changed, and then I'll tell you all about it?”

Betsy nods, so Cady scurries off to her room. While in the middle of changing into some sleep clothes, she gets a notification on her phone. She picks it up off the bed, smiling at the image of her and Regina looking back at her from the lock screen. 

Regina - 9:05pm

Made it home! 😊

Cady - 9:06pm

Yay!

Cady - 9:06pm

My mom seemed really impressed that you designed my outfit, by the way.