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Sirius chews the inside of his cheek as he stares down a row of Christmas cards in the shop around the corner for his office and tries not to feel like the world’s biggest arse. He wishes he hadn’t waited to the last minute to do this, but when he pulled Remus Lupin’s name out of the hat for the office-wide Secret Santa exchange he’d panicked.
For one thing, he doesn’t really know Remus all that well. He has no idea what Remus’s hobbies are, if he likes Star Trek or Star Wars, or what his favorite color is. And sure they get along well enough—they exchange pleasantries during coffee breaks and smile and nod at each other whenever they pass in the halls—but it never went beyond that “we are friendly but not actually friends” way people act when they don’t really know each other but see each other on the regular. Something that frustrated Sirius immensely because he could charm the pants off a nun, but for some reason he lost all his cool around Remus and could never work up the courage to actually just ask him out.
Bright colors and words like “joy” and “merry” and “baby Jesus” jump out at him as his eyes leap from card to card, trying to find the one that best says: “I’m sorry I forgot to buy you an actual present, but I’m shit when it comes to these Secret Santa things, and even though I’ve had a bit of a crush on you since we worked together on that sales project over the summer, I had no idea what to get you and now it’s too late so here’s a card with a puppy wearing reindeer antlers. I hope you like it.”
He rubs a palm across his face and grabs the card with the black Labrador and the ridiculous antlers. It’s stupid but he can’t be the only one without something to give for the gift exchange today. He snags a gift card for Starbucks on the way to the counter (because he has definitely seen Remus drink coffee), and as he is waiting in line he sees a small gift-basket full of assorted chocolates that want to look like they’re more expensive than they actually are sitting on a display. It’s definitely the sort of thing you’d give someone you’re actually dating, but Remus keeps a bowl of chocolates and other sweets on his desk and everyone is always welcome to take some. Sirius knows this because he makes a trip every Friday on dress-down days, claiming he has a sweet-tooth when really he just likes to ogle Remus in jeans. But it would definitely add a personal touch so he grabs it before he has time to talk himself out of it.
Five minutes later he’s heading back into the office with his purchases in a small gift bag the counter-lady talked him into buying, having scribbled a hasty “Happy Christmas from your Secret Santa” on the card—which is kind of lame but he didn’t know what else to write. He rounds the corner after the lift and spies a bundle of green leaves and berries hanging over the door that leads to the open office where his desk is, and he rolls his eyes. HR has been removing the mistletoe every day it since someone put it up the first day of December because it’s “Not appropriate for the workplace”, but no matter how many times they take it down it’s usually up again by lunch the next day. Sirius is pretty sure James is the culprit because he’s been flirting with the girl in advertising for ages, but so far all he’s gotten for his trouble is a one-hour harassment session.
He drops the gift on his desk and logs into his computer to check his calendar. He has a tele-conference at two with some buyers but otherwise he’s free. Most people are still out to lunch right now, he ought to go drop the gift off on Remus’ desk in finance and be done with it. He’s about to do just that when it’s snatched off his desk.
“Ho ho ho!” James says as he hops onto Sirius’ desk and begins rummaging through the bag. He gives Sirius a dubious look. “Chocolates? Really?”
Sirius shrugs and takes the bag back, smoothing it out, and says, “Remus likes chocolate.”
James only smirks. “You’ve got it so bad.”
“I do not,” Sirius says, even though he really kind of does. “Anyway you’re one to talk. Evans gone to HR again lately?”
“It was one time,” James says. “And I learned my lesson. Hostile work environment and all that. I just ask her how her day is going I’m not ‘harassing’ her. It’s this new thing people do. Talking to each other, getting to know each other. You might want to try it sometime.”
“I talk,” Sirius grumbles even though the last time he had a conversation with Remus it was about how the microwave in the breakroom was shit and always left things cold or way too hot. Sirius locks his computer and heads towards finance and James falls into step beside him.
“It’s just you’ve been dancing around this guy for months. I’ve seen you score dates with a practically a crook of your finger. What gives?”
"Dunno."
Truly, Sirius has no idea why Remus makes him so stupid in the head. Anytime they manage to have a conversation it’s inane prattle about the weather or something equally boring or awkward. He knows he more charming than that, but Remus Gorgeous Lupin with his brown eyes and his sweater vests gets him all tongue-tied and he forgets for a while that he’s actually clever. He thought they were hitting it off over the summer when they were put on a project together, spending so much time making eye-sex Sirius thought he’d wind up with a harassment violation. But apparently they worked too well together because they wrapped it up quickly and then went back to their separate corners of the building, and now Sirius thinks that he may have lost his chance.
"Maybe you should melt the chocolate down and, y'know, rub it all over your body and offer it to him then? That'd would probably get the idea across."
It's a wonder James is still single. "You're not actually helpful. Just so you know."
"What? Right now all you've go going for you is your looks anyway."
"I don't want to shag him, alright? Well, I do actually," Sirius amends after realizing what he's just said. God this would probably be so much easier if all he wanted to do was get into Remus' pants. "I mean I don't just want to shag him. I like him."
"My baby boy is in love," James says tearfully and Sirius jams an elbow in his ribs to shut him up.
They round the corner to where all the finance people sit and hurry towards Remus’s desk at the end before they all return from lunch. Sirius stops short though when he sees an enormous gift basket by the keyboard on Remus’s desk. It is easily three times the size of the basket Sirius bought, tied up with gold and silver ribbon, and filled with various (actually expensive looking) chocolates.
“Oh, bad luck, mate,” James says when he sees it.
“Awesome,” Sirius deadpans. There’s been a lot of gift exchanging all week what with Christmas being a week away, but he didn’t think someone would buy something this nice. He can’t give his cheap little basket to Remus now. And he doesn’t have time to run out and find something else. There is a note folded over on the top that Sirius is half-tempted to read but he doesn’t. He really doesn’t want to know if it’s from Remus’s girlfriend or boyfriend or whatever.
So instead he pulls the card out of the bag and makes sure the gift card has not slid out before placing it on the other side of the keyboard. He hands the rest back to James. “Here give it to Evans or something.”
James gives him a sympathetic look but he says, “Thanks. You’re going to be the best man at our wedding one day.”
Sirius lets out a huff of laughter, even though he doesn’t quite feel like laughing right now, because he thinks he’s more likely to attend James’ funeral before his wedding to Lily Evans. They turn to go and Sirius tries very hard not to feel too disappointed that he really probably has missed his chance.
oOo
The rest of Sirius’ remains otherwise uneventful. His meeting with the buyers goes well, and he only has to show his cube-mate, a new bloke named Pettigrew, how to set up his outgoing message once before he gets it. His own Secret Santa manages to perform a sneak attack while he takes a restroom break and leaves him a gift which is, ironically, a gift card to Starbucks and a rather nice coffee mug. He packs it up in his bag with his laptop and some files he needs to finish a report when he gets home. He is just swinging his bag onto his shoulder and locking up his desk when he turns and sees someone standing just a few feet away on the other side of his cubicle. Immediately he feels his heart rate speed up and his stomach clench.
“Hello,” he says, after too much silence and staring.
“Hello,” Remus says. His own bag is strapped across his chest but Sirius can still make out the reindeer on the ugly sweater vest he’s wearing today. In his hand Sirius can see the Christmas card with the black Labrador puppy.
“Busy day?” Sirius asks, because he can’t even try to stop the stupid small talk anymore.
Remus shrugs. “A bit. End of the calendar year is always rather hectic and it’s also the end of the month so, you know…”
“Right,” Sirius says, nodding.
“And we had a small party for our boss over in finance. She’s been here ten years today so we all pitched in and got her a gift basket and some cake.”
“Oh.” Oh.
“Anyway, you done for the day?” Remus asks, nodding towards the door.
“Yeah, heading home now.”
“Cool, me too.”
Sirius can practically feel the uncomfortable silence between them as they head towards the lift and is trying to think of something cool and interesting say when Remus says, “I wanted to thank you for the card, by the way.”
Wait what?” Sirius says, stopping to look at him.
Remus’s ears are pink and he’s smiling. He holds up the card with antlered puppy. “You were my Secret Santa, right?”
“I was. How did you know?” Sirius asks, wondering if James gave him away, already plotting ways to make him suffer.
Remus takes a step closer and flips the card open to Sirius’s messy scrawl. “It was the way you wrote your ‘S’s. I remember when we were in that conference room and you were writing notes on the board, I thought they looked funny and I recognized them.”
Sirius has no clue what to say to that because he’s too preoccupied with the thought that Remus Lupin recognized his handwriting from months ago so of course the first thing out of his mouth is, “My ‘S’s don’t look funny.”
Remus gives a quiet laugh and is it Sirius’ imagination or is he leaning in closer? Sirius can practically count the freckles scattered across his nose. “Okay maybe they’re not funny. They’re unique. Better?”
“Much.”
“Hmmm.”
And they are staring for far too long now, Sirius thinks. He should probably look away. It’s lucky the office it mostly empty at this point because people would start talking. He’s about to take a step back when he feels a hand on his wrist and Remus glances up. Sirius follows his gaze and just a few feet above them is the sprig of mistletoe HR had failed to keep down that day. He glances back down at Remus who is smiling at him like a cat that ate the canary.
“Do you know how hard it’s been getting that up there every day without getting caught?” Remus asks.
Sirius feels his mouth drop a little. “You’re the one who’s been putting it up?”
The pink from Remus’s ears spreads to his cheeks. “Well, I wanted something very specific for Christmas this year and this seemed like the only way to get it.”
Sirius’s brain decides to be helpful for the first time this whole conversation as he puts two and two together and oh. Oh hell yes. Sirius closes the distance between them until they’re chest to chest, and lets one of his hands come to rest on Remus’s waist.
“And what did you want, Mr. Lupin?” Sirius asks, and it sounds low and flirty and like he knows exactly what Remus wants.
Remus just rolls his eyes because it’s probably the coolest, sexiest thing Sirius has ever said to him and it still manages to be ridiculous. “Just kiss me already.”
And Sirius does.
The End <3