Chapter Text
Vaggie stood in front of the full mirror, smoothing out the front of her dress for the third time. A little piece of the laced fabric just wouldn’t stay down. She pressed it down, but it bunched up again.
She groaned, then told herself to take a deep breath. It was barely noticeable. It was going to be fine. Besides, she was marrying Charlie! Today was going to be the best day of her life regardless.
She looked up to the clock mounted on the wall, bit her lip, and began to worry. She couldn’t shake the feeling of the heavy stone of anxiety on her chest or the coil of nausea in her stomach. She knew that had all worked hard on planning and putting together the ceremony, but she couldn’t stop thinking about the possibility of something going wrong.
What if the punch bowl fell over? What if someone got too drunk and threw up everywhere? What if she got her dress torn or dirty? What if she choked up during her vows? What if the guests got too rowdy, and started a fight? They had tried to keep the invitation and talk of the wedding lowkey, only inviting certain friends and acquaintances, but what if word got out? A royal wedding would be right up the people’s alley. What if they crashed it? Started a party? God forbid the media coverage showing up.
She just wanted a perfect, calm, peaceful, and quiet wedding. They deserved it. Just one day. It could almost make up for the chaos that was their lives.
Vaggie nearly jumped at abrupt footsteps running past the room she was currently in, out in the hall. If she concentrated hard enough, she could hear the sounds all around her. The sounds of life, of people arriving for the wedding. The polite murmur of talking, the clinking of cups at the bar, the shuffle of chairs, the soft classical music playing from the piano.
Alastor had materialized a piano in the lobby for the occasion, but Lucifer had insisted on turning it to pure gold. They had bickered like an old married couple for several minutes until Vaggie told them the fucking color of the fucking piano didn’t fucking matter.
Down below, her friends were finishing up everything as guests arrived. Cherri was upstairs, helping them with hair and makeup as needed. Lucifer was to and from, constantly reminding them of the time and announcing who had arrived.
She let out a sigh, and then there was a knock at the door. Speak of the Devil. Literally.
“Thirty minutes until show time!” Lucifer’s voice came from the door, chipper and upbeat. Vaggie wished she had his energy. She had barely slept last night. He knocked again, jiggling the door knob. “Are you decent?”
She raised an eyebrow, turning from where she was seated on the chair in the front of the vanity. “Yes,” she managed.
“Perfect!” Lucifer exclaimed. He opened the door and pushed in, a clipboard in his hands. “Right on schedule.” Of course he made a schedule. “Are you finishing up?”
She watched him through the mirror as he moved into the room, one of the upstairs hotel rooms that had converted into a makeshift dressing room. She squinted, noticing his puffy eyes, red-rimmed. “Are you crying?” She asked.
“What?” Lucifer asked, snapping his head up. “No. Uh, well,” he said, then tilted her head. “Yes. I was just with Charlie, and we got to talking, and the waterworks started. You know how it is. She’s just all grown up, getting married. Wow, I still don’t believe it.”
Vaggie turned back to the vanity, crossing her arms over her abdomen. “Me either.”
“And then I cried, then she started to cry, and Cherri started yelling at me that I’m messing up her eye makeup,” Lucifer continued, rambling. “She told me to leave, so I figured I’d come check on you.” He looked up, catching a glance of her for the first time. He paused, regarding her. “ Whoa. Look at you.”
Vaggie felt her cheeks warm. Her gaze raised, looking at herself in the mirror. She was dressed in the dress he had designed and altered to her liking. It was black, falling above her ankle. The top hugged her torso in a soft m shape, revealing her shoulders and collarbones. Her hair was worn half up and half down. She had ditched her usual pink bow for a black one to tie back her top layer of hair.
Vaggie only sighed, looking back down. She bit her lip. “I don’t like it.”
Lucifer was quiet for a moment. He stepped over to her and reached onto the vanity, where abandoned cosmetics and hair care products laid, half used. She had probably used up two bottles of hair spray to make her hair lie flat. He reached past those and snatched up her veil, a long piece of translucent fabric that sat on the edge of the desk. It was also black, with a top that formed a simple crown that would sit atop her head. Charlie’s veil held a more elaborate motif, as she was the actual princess.
Sometimes Vaggie literally forgot she was marrying the princess. She would be joining the royal family. What would her official title be? Princess? Royal Consort? Gah. That was weird to think about. It didn’t matter much anyway. She was just looking forward to marrying the love of her life.
She watched through her eyelashes as Lucifer carefully picked up the veil and moved to put it on top of her head. She bowed her head to make it easier and he hummed in acknowledgment, cautiously adjusting pieces of her heir around the piece. Then he picked up the soft-bristle hair brush from the center of the vanity and carefully worked through the end strands of her hair, the strands that were hard to reach.
She studied his movements through the mirror. He looked up and met her gaze, beginning to smile. “You know,” he said. “I used to help Charlie with her hair all the time when she was a little girl.”
Vaggie began to smile herself, wrinkling her nose. She imagined Charlie as a little girl with her father.
Lucifer set down the brush and adjusted the veil over the back of her head. It cascaded off her hair like a black waterfall. “There,” he said, taking a step back. “All done.” He placed two hands on her shoulders, studying her reflection alongside her. “You’re beautiful, Vaggie. Charlie sure knows how to pick ‘em, huh?”
Her cheeks went warm, but she chuckled. “Yeah. Sure.”
“Oh, it was only yesterday I was meeting you for the first time,” he suddenly said, starting to sniffle. Wait. Was he going to cry? Again? “And I was calling you Maggie for, like, a month. Fun times, wasn’t it?”
Vaggie narrowed her one good eye. “Very.”
Then Lucifer was sniffling again. She turned to face him, flashing him an exasperated look. They didn’t have time for this. “Lucifer.”
“I’m sorry. All the memories are coming back. I swore just yesterday she could barely walk, toddling along, and now she’s walking down the aisle—“
“Lucifer,” she hissed. “We’re staying here. You’re acting like we’re moving five Rings away. We will stay right here, everyday. You can visit. Hell, Charlie was even talking about you moving in permanently. You already have your own room, and you’re here enough already.”
He perked up. “Really?”
She scowled. “No. We’re not getting rooms with connecting doors. Stop asking.”
“But it would be so fun, Vaggie,” he exclaimed, putting an arm around her. “We could stay up and have those movie nights Charlie likes, and brainstorm ideas for the hotel.”
“Uh huh,” Vaggie replied.
“And when you two have arguments, I’ll be there to offer my advice,” he continued.
She squinted, furrowing her eyebrows. “Relationship advice?” She echoed. “From you?”
He flashed her a look. “Hey. I’ve been around!”
“Mhm. I’m sure.”
“And I'm a very good diplomat, if I do say so myself. I’ve had thousands of years to gather knowledge and wisdom.”
Vaggie frowned. “You still argue with, like, half of the residents.”
He frowned back. “It’s not my fault they’re so incompetent.”
“Whatever,” she said, rolling her eye. “Just remember you can come over and stop acting so distraught. It’s a happy day. Try to play the part.”
“Yes. I will.”
She scowled. “And please stop materializing into the lobby. You scare the shit out of me.”
“ I scare you? You were the one who charged at me with a spear!” He exclaimed. “I saw my life flash before my eyes, and most of it was just sad!”
“I thought you were an intruder,” she said back.
“What kind of intruder pops up in your lobby in a dusting of gold smoke and glitter?” Lucifer asked, eye widening with each word.
Good question.
“Fair point,” she sighed,
He shrugged. “Well, as you were charging at me, I was debating turning you inside out. I guess we’re even.”
She bristled. “What?”
“What?” He echoed.
There was silence for a moment. He looked down and inspected his nails. Vaggie turned to look at him, careful not to twist her dress in the process. He was dressed in a crisp, tailored white suit and pants, with the matching waistcoat and top hot. Aware of her gaze, he looked up.
He just looked back at her again, as if awestruck again, seeing her for the first time. He reached out and brushed a stray strand out of her face. “Don’t you look pretty? Charlie might pass out. I’ll tell Husk to keep some extra ice on standby.”
Vaggie snorted, sensing the sentimental moment was over. “I hope that doesn’t happen. It would be our luck though.”
“Nothing bad will happen. I forbid it,” Lucifer exclaimed quickly. “My little girl will have the best wedding ever, if it’s the last thing I do.” He turned and gave her an awkward pat on the head, then turned back to his clipboard. “And you too, of course,” he added. “You deserve a nice wedding.”
With that, he scribbled something down on his paper. He turned away, starting to whistle. Vaggie thought it was the old tune of Here Comes the Bride. She raised her eyebrows, surprised. “That’s it?”
Lucifer raised his head. “Hm?”
“No scary speech about treating Charlie right before I marry her?” Vaggie asked.
Lucifer paused, squinting. “No. I know Charlie can handle herself, and, if anyone hurt her, you’d probably cut them up into little pieces and deliver the platter to Cannibal Town yourself.”
He said that all with a wide, unwavering smile that didn’t fit those words at all. His smile twitched, then Vaggie caught sight of a brief flash of glowing red eyes and scarlet horns. God, she was never getting used to that. She nearly shrunk back in her seat.
“Just treat her right and we won’t have any problems at all!” He said with a laugh, then checked his wristwatch. “Oh, I better be going. Almost time. Good luck, Vaggie.”
She raised her eyebrows. “With?”
“The ceremony! It’s a bit of a circus down there, but don’t worry. I have it covered. Anyone who messes up your special day will be left to burn in the eternal flames, which I will personally escort them to!” He said, again, way too happily. He reached the door, pulling on the knob. “Toodles! Good talk. Don’t tell anyone— but you’re my favorite daughter-in-law.”
“I’m your only daughter-in-law,” she pointed out.
“And that’s what makes you so special!” He exclaimed. “Well, I’m off to check on Charlie one last time. I’ll try not to cry, but no promises.”
“Wait,” she called out after him. He stopped in the doorway. “How’s Charlie?”
Her cheeks warmed at the thought of her bride, her soon-to-be-wife. She could only imagine how she looked in her dress. She couldn’t wait to see her.
“Why don’t you go see for yourself?” Lucifer asked, wiggling his eyebrows up and down. “She’s been asking about you. Why don’t you just go see her?”
“I can?” She asked, as if the idea didn’t come to her at all. She guess she had thought she stayed in here until it was time for the ceremony to start.
“Of course! Knock yourselves out. But not literally. You crazy kids keep your clothes on, okay?”
“Lucifer,” she hissed again.
“What? Those dresses are hard to get on and off. We don’t have time for any.. shenanigans—“
“Yeah, okay,” Vaggie sputtered. “Get out.”
He raised his eyebrows. “Nothing to be embarrassed about, Vaggie. We all do it.”
“ Get out.”
He blinked. “As you wish.” He moved towards the door, closing it, then briefly paused. “And, Vaggie?”
She nearly groaned, but saw the sincere expression on his face. “What?”
“Charlie is very glad you’re joining our family,” he replied. “As am I.”
With that, she shut the door with a soft click, leaving Vaggie alone with a warm, happy feeling in her chest. She turned back to the vanity and took a deep breath, readying herself to go see her bride, and for the wedding ahead.
———
Angel sat at the bar counter, surveying the crowd around him in the lobby. They were all waiting for the music to start to be rounded into the back courtyard, where the actual ceremony would be held. They had spent the last week decorating it— string lights and flowers, banners and balloons, all the chairs.
Lucifer had been down there regularly to remind them of the time. The wedding was set to start in a half hour, but seeing as things like this usually started late, they had forty minutes tops. Angel lounged in the bar area, sipping his drink. Lucifer had put a two drink limit for all guests attending, but didn’t give a fuck. He knew Husk would serve him, or he would jump the counter and just serve himself.
He was happy for the two broads. Being happy meant getting wasted. Duh.
So, he sat down, downing his drink, looking at the people all around him. There were mostly Hellborns, but some Sinners too. Some of the new hotel residents milled around, happy to get out of a day of redemption exercises. Angel didn’t recognize most of the demons. Probably friends Lucifer invited.
He was brought back to the present as Husk threw a dishrag at him. It landed on his face and he simply snorted, sending it flying down to the floor below. “What?” He snapped.
“Rings,” was all he said, face straight.
“What for?”
“It’s starting soon,” Husk replied. “Lucifer asked us to get Razzle ready.”
Right. The little goat demon was the ring bearer. He wasn’t as adorable as Fat Nuggets, but was a close second.
“Yeah. Alright.” He turned and started digging through his jacket pocket. The first one was empty. Strange. He pulled out (ha). “Um..”
“For God’s sake,” Husk spat. “Don’t tell me you lost it!”
“I didn’t! Don’t get your panties in a pinch, Whiskers.”
“Do you think I wear panties?”
Angel only stopped to send him a wink. “What? Do you want me to think about what’s in your pants?”
“Shut up.”
“Is that yes?” Angel mused.
Husk only scoffed. “Rings,” he said again.
Angel patted down his other pockets, starting to panic a bit internally. “Uh…”
“ Angel! You had one job! Lucifer is gonna kill us!”
“At least we will die together, happy,” Angel teased back.
“I’d rather eat my own pants than die with you,” Husk grumbled
Angel fumbled for a snide reply. Then it came to him. “Oh!” He exclaimed. “I already gave it to Razzle. Nif called me over to help with the chairs, so I gave it to him, told him to keep it safe.”
“Good,” Husk commented, eyes searching the room for a flash of red. “Let’s find him.”
Angel nodded. Finding him wasn’t that hard. He was in a corner with KeeKee, next to the long tables set up for dinner. He was dressed in a small and fancy suit and matching bowtie. It came with a pocket Angel had slipped the rings into, the same pocket Charlie and Vaggie would get their rings out of during the actual wedding.
When he caught sight of them, Razzle flew up to greet them, bleating happily. “Yeah, yeah,” Angel said. “Just checking.”
He slipped his fingers into the pocket. It was empty.
“Fuck,” Angel cursed. “What did you do with it?”
The only response was Razzle swallowing thickly, then letting out a loud burp. Wait. Had the goat just swallowed the wedding rings?
Holy fuck. We’re dead.
Angel pulled away, eyes wide. He turned to Husk, who was at his side. “Okay,” he said. “ Small problem.”
Husk flicked his ear. “What?”
“..the goat might’ve eaten the rings?”
“WHAT?!”