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“Eject! Eject! Eject!”
Claustrophobia combined with the whirling of the jet echoed in Maverick’s mind. He remembered the sheer terror he felt as the world whizzed past him. It felt like there would never be enough air in the entire universe until the top opened and he ejected out.
A resounding crunch that would haunt him forever filled his ears. It wasn’t until later he would learn that was the sound of Goose’s neck breaking, killing him instantly. He would see the blood in the water, leaking from his mouth and ears as he begged Goose to stay with him. His screams echoed throughout the entire ocean and he feared that he would never be able to close his eyes and see anything else.
A rumbling of thunder momentarily brought Maverick to the here and now. He glanced up from where he had been seated on the bottom step of the porch, staring off into nothingness. The sun had gone down hours ago and the thickness in the air promised rain. There was no telling how long he had been sitting here, yet from the ache in his back, he could tell it had been a while.
Rain drops began to sprinkle down before turning into a steady downpour. A few splashes landed on the top of his head before they traveled the rest of the way down his body. He gave his head a much needed shake to dislodge them, though it did little good as the rain grew more intense. Never did Maverick even consider standing and moving to the center of the porch, or better yet, inside the house.
No, this was something he just had to do.
The screen door behind him swung open, the light screech audible even in the storm. Maverick didn’t need to look over his shoulder to know who was standing there, and the worried look he would be sure was in his eyes. He wasn’t even sure he could handle that look right now.
“Mav?”
Maverick didn’t answer, keeping his gaze firmly forward. Tears began to well in his eyes, and no matter how he attempted to clench his throat and imagine happier things, he couldn’t stop them from rolling down his cheeks. The wariness of his tears mixed with the cool of the rain, giving him a more euphoric feeling than he was expecting. Still, he couldn’t even try to formulate an answer to the man behind him.
“Maverick?”
There wasn’t anything anyone could say to make this better. Even if Maverick poured out his heart, he felt it wouldn’t matter. The pain, the loss was just too much. He not only grieved for what he had lost, but for what he had caused others to lose. A wife had lost her husband and a boy his father. Maverick could never forgive himself for that.
“Pete!”
Maverick flinched at his real name. It was rare for anyone to call him that and he hated hearing it. Normally it was only in times of dire need, which caused Maverick’s heart to ache in a completely new way. Yet, he couldn’t turn or speak, merely stayed where he was, attempting to quiet his sobs as much as possible.
To Maverick’s surprise, the man behind him didn’t leave. In fact, he only came closer behind him until he could smell the familiar cologne.
“Are you going to sit here in the rain the whole night? Because that’s a surefire way to make things better, huh?”
Maverick narrowed his eyes. “What do you care? You left!”
The man in question snorted in amusement. “So dramatic.” When Maverick didn’t answer, he began to pull a well worn hoodie from over his head and began to drape it over Maverick. He maneuvered the man so that he could pull it on fully and drew back to watch him in his plain t-shirt. “That better?”
“Nothing will ever be better.”
“I know, and I’m sorry. If there was any other way, you know I would’ve taken it.”
Tears flowed heavier as Maverick fought to catch his breath. He couldn’t have anyone hear the heartbreak in his voice. “It wasn’t your fault.”
“And it also wasn’t yours. It was never your fault.”
Maverick’s crying turned into keening that left his entire body shaking. Anger bubbled inside of him as he pulled the sweatshirt even closer around him and buried his nose into the collar, pulling all the scent he could muster as the water began to drench through it. He still made no intention to move, only more determined to stay where he was despite whatever was going on around him.
“Maverick!”
This time the voice was sharper, different, and much clearer. Maverick startled as he turned to look back over his shoulder to see a very frightened Ice behind him. He was wearing his pajamas as he eyed Maverick up and down as if he couldn’t believe that the pilot was sitting in the rain on the front porch.
“What the hell are you doing? Is that Goose’s sweatshirt?”
Maverick turned back straight ahead as he let out another gut wrenching scream. It was drowned out by the rumble of thunder, though the sound still reached Maverick’s ears. He grabbed fistfuls of the thick fabric under him, remembering how Goose had worn this sweatshirt so proudly. Maverick felt as though he was swimming in it and could almost hear Goose’s teasing voice about his size in his ear.
Ice drew closer until he was down the stairs with him. He sat on the final step as well, shivering as the cool raindrops sprinkled his skin. “Hey, hey,” he began as he gripped Maverick’s elbow and gave it a tight squeeze. “Talk to me. What’s going on?”
There were too many things that Maverick wanted to say. He knew that he could be honest with Ice, yet he couldn’t formulate any words. Tears were the only thing that Maverick seemed to be able to produce, as well as the cries that shook both of their souls. Ice didn’t care about loud Maverick became, only what had pushed him to this breaking point.
“Mav?”
Maverick truly broke down as he buried his head into his knees. His fists struck his thighs firmly as he trembled with each wail.
Ice didn’t hesitate to wrap his arms around Maverick and pull him close until the pilot’s face was pressed against his chest. Ice rested his chin atop Maverick’s wet hair, the dampness from the sweatshirt already seeping into his own clothes. He couldn’t have cared less, so long as the dark haired pilot was safe in his grasp.
“I know, I know,” Ice whispered in his ear as Maverick weakly attempted to fight him off. He lightly hit at Ice’s own legs, though Ice hardly felt it. If he would’ve grown more agitated and meaningfully in his attempts, Ice would’ve released him. However, he knew that was the last thing Maverick needed right now.
A sudden flash of lightning seemed to illuminate the entire area for a split second. Maverick’s eyes caught it as his breath lodged deep in his throat. He swallowed heavily, the weight of the world seeming to fall on his shoulders.
“Promise me everything is going to be okay,” he begged, voice hardly more than a whisper.
Ice sighed. “You know I can’t promise you that. But, I can promise that as long as I’m alive, you won’t be alone. I’ll be here as long as I can.”
Maverick closed his eyes tightly as he gripped on hard to Ice as if he was his own tether to this world. Nothing either of them did would ever bring back what had been lost, that much Maverick knew. However, to have Ice with him was all that he could ask for after everything that happened.
As the storm raged on, Maverick stayed where he was, unable to do much as even think about moving. Ice didn’t push him, merely stayed with him for as long as it would take. Grief may last a lifetime, and that was a lifetime Maverick wasn’t sure he would ever be able to live through.