Archive of Our Own ^beta

Chapter Text

“Of course it’s happening in your head.
Why should that mean it’s not real?”

-Albus Dumbledore

--

When Naruto first met Sasuke, he thought that he had imagined him.

To be fair, it wasn’t the only time that’s happened to him and most certainly wouldn’t be the last. Though he did have his doubts about this particular illusion. For one, he wasn’t sure his mind was even capable of creating someone like that. Sasuke was out of his league by a long shot and there was nothing odd about him- nothing that warranted any fear of drawing too close.

Naruto’s hallucinations didn’t work that way.

He has watched men with devilish eyes control the crows flocked outside his window. He’s known beings that held a closer resemblance to serpents than humans, with forked tongues and a piercing reptilian stare. He’s seen masks embedded in gnarled trees, one glowing red eye peering out at him from between the cracks. And while it was often jarring, none of it was really all that surprising anymore. He came to expect the unexpected, to anticipate the sudden appearance of a fearsome stranger.

Before he wound up in this place it happened so frequently that he found it far more startling not to see some nightmarish form.

No. That wasn’t entirely fair. Yes, their features could often be quite monstrous, but there was just as much about them that could be perceived as rather striking. And Naruto had been fooled by it before. He had seen a friend where there hadn’t even been a person- all with the belief that their uniqueness wasn’t all that different from anyone else’s.

Yeah.. he’s definitely been wrong before.

Which is why it was safer to just assume that everything he saw was a fabrication, a fantasy. An unrealistic illusion in an unbalanced mind.

Things that Naruto knew better than to believe in- people he couldn’t count on, that he couldn’t..

love.

And that same thought occurred to him then too, when he spotted a new face on the far side of the room. 

The person Naruto couldn’t help but notice that day was tall, lean, mysterious as hell, and undeniably beautiful. His long inky black hair feathered out like raven’s wings perched around a perfect porcelain face. His jaw was chiseled, masculine, but there was femininity in his full bottom lip.. a hint of softness that he was easily distracted by.

No, striking didn’t even come close.

And yet none of those attributes quite compared to the man’s eyes.

Naruto has always been captivated by people’s eyes- the real and the imagined. It just so happened that most of his experiences were with the ones that weren’t actually there.

The people Naruto’s broken mind conjured up were unique, to say the least, and their eyes were no exception. Their sudden unwarranted appearance would intrigue him, torment him, and yet everytime he couldn’t help but stare. And while Naruto did enjoy doing so, the novelty could only go so far.

When those unyielding gazes darkened, or their eyes flashed the color of blood and forced their way deep into his mind, Naruto’s stomach would tangle like vines and crawl up the back of his throat. He wouldn’t be able to move when it happened, couldn’t stop himself from spewing terrified nonsense as his meager hold on reality completely fell. All fascination and curiosity would instantly deteriorate with it- like dead leaves against a cruel Autumn wind.

But when the debris cleared, his fears finally settled, it would start all over again. And once more, Naruto would lose himself to another spellbinding stare. And inevitably regret it.

Sasuke’s dark eyes drew him in instantly, just like all the others’, but this time Naruto couldn’t exactly explain why. It wasn’t like there was anything inherently exceptional about them. The set seemed to be nothing more than two deep pools of impenetrable darkness- a void that was probably better left avoided. And yet Naruto couldn’t seem to look away. He was convinced that there was life somewhere inside that hollow stare, and he had the sudden inexplicable urge to find it.

He was so sure that it wasn’t real…

Naruto wouldn’t typically question his sanity like this. Well, not since he had been admitted into the psychiatric facility. His hallucinations had been torn away from him the moment he was admitted- drowned in the chemicals of every little capsule they forced down his throat. His world hadn’t been the same since. It was now shaded in predictability, shrouded in what others have so easily deemed normalcy, leaving him with little to stare at.

Life was excruciatingly stagnant when he was mentally sound, and he had soon come to resent it.

‘Normal’ had never been this way for Naruto. For him, it was only natural to question your reality- to find yourself startled by the things it threw at you and wonder over it as it dug its claws into your life. And, truth be told, he missed it.

Naruto’s schizophrenia shaped his reality a long time ago. For as long as he could remember his world had been colorful and sporadic- a place of abrupt chaos, blurs of beauty and horror meshed into one. Everyone else’s temperate reality had only been a part of his life for a little over a year. It shouldn’t shock anyone that he would crave it-

his normal.

That he would struggle to adapt to something that didn’t feel like it truly belonged in his mind. But that wasn’t what people wanted to hear, so Naruto had quickly learned to keep those feelings to himself. He knew he’d be stuck here a lot longer if he didn’t.

Naruto’s foster parents had signed him over to the institution without a second thought, eager to be rid of him, and the state was all too happy to side with them on it. And why wouldn’t they? Naruto’s rights as an adult didn’t seem to matter. Not when he was causing problems all over town, “disturbing the peace” and its citizens’ rigid lifestyles.

It was blatant to everyone that Naruto didn’t have a place in it, that he didn’t belong. So, they decided to find one for him. And none of his ranting about it being against his will, about his rights and how he had never done any actual harm, made a bit of difference.

So, he foolishly gave up.

Naruto had naively assumed that he could just reject their treatments. That he could still carve out his own path from behind their concrete walls. He was twenty years old, for fucks sake! Why wouldn’t he be the one in control of his own life? Unfortunately, no one else saw it that way. He was quickly deemed “not mentally stable enough to make that decision on his own”. A load of bullshit, but he was powerless to overturn it.

So now he was stuck in Konoha’s mental institution- a prison for people with the audacity to see the world differently from the masses. And it didn’t look like he would be released from it any time soon.

To make his forced stay a little more bearable, Naruto decided to hold tight to the only thing he had left, a glimmer of his truth, his reality, and he refused to relent his grasp on it. He knew his morphed reality wasn’t healthy but it was familiar, and he couldn’t just fully abandon it. So from time to time, when he found the opportunity, Naruto would sneak off to flush his meds down the toilet and welcome back his erratic hallucinations with open arms. He wasn’t able to get away with it often but there were a few occasions when everything lined up just right. When the orderlies were just a little too overworked, when they became a bit careless when they otherwise wouldn’t have been. Naruto noticed these rare opportunities immediately, and he was always quick to take advantage of them.

And it just so happened that the day Sasuke was admitted was one of those days.

--

Sasuke was unaware of Naruto’s interest in him at first.

He read his blank stare as one of judgement and hostility, though his own paranoia could be partially to blame for that. Later he would come to find out that it was just another unique characteristic found in people with schizophrenia, but at the time he didn’t understand that. And he didn’t bother to hide his displeasure when he saw it.

It was his first day in the asylum, and his nerves were already pretty frazzled as it is. His privacy was nonexistent, his freedom revoked, and his anger was escalating fast. The orderlies were unbothered by his outrage, which only pissed him off more. Sasuke was eager to find someone else to direct it at- someone who would react to it.

And that is when he met Naruto.

Sasuke had just been rather forcefully led into the community room, where he was expected to interact with the other unwanteds and “find a creative outlet”. He had no interest in doing anything of the sort, but of course his protests fell on deaf ears. Usually that would be enough to make him fucking implode, but the bastards had managed to take even that away from him. The meds they had practically shoved down his throat took the edge off his ever-persistent rage, though he could already tell the dosage wasn’t strong enough.

A little factoid he was more than happy to keep to himself.

Sasuke snarled at the two men as they dragged him further into the shared community space, anger flaring through him at their every move, but the orderlies’ apathy was rock solid. The Uchiha made a vow to himself then and there that he would be sure to find a way to elicit fear in those two during his forced stay in this hellhole, even if just for a moment. Their penance for brushing him off like he was no threat at all to them.

They would pay for their blatant disregard.

The two men finally came to a stop and loosened their hold, and Sasuke was quick to shake them off the rest of the way. He jerked back and turned to glare daggers at the duo. They gave him an unimpressed look then moved over to the far side of the room to take their post.

“Fucking pricks.”

Sasuke brushed off his dark t-shirt, smoothing out the wrinkles made by those assholes’ meaty paws, then wiped his palms on his black sweats. Because, of course, no one of sane mind could wear anything else, right?! It definitely didn’t have anything to do with them seeing him as a goddamn threat when he wasn’t wearing fucking pajamas all day!

Sasuke gritted his teeth together, salvaging some semblance of control before turning to survey the rest of the room.

It was far too bright for his liking- a wall of windows relentlessly luminous in the open space. Unfortunately, there were no blinds or curtains to block out the incessant day, otherwise that would have been Sasuke’s preferred ‘community room activity’.

The rest of the patients seemed to have found something more productive to do than simply glare at everything in sight, more or less. There were a few self-proclaimed artists curled up with sketchbooks, a brunette making an acrylic monstrosity on a large canvas closer to the windows. Sasuke rolled his eyes and continued his silent judgement as he observed people knitting and crocheting away their worries, a pair arguing over a game of chess, a few writers and poets mumbling synonyms to themselves as they gnawed on their pencils.

Sasuke’s gaze flitted past all of them, disinterested, wondering if there was anyone here that he could entertain himself with. He was starting to think that he was wrong to assume there could be in the first place when he saw him.

Sasuke was drawn to Naruto instantly. Hell, how could he not be? He was practically a beacon- a lone bulb in a dark suffocating room. Despite the wall of windows, the aggravatingly bright light flooding the place, everything still felt so bleak here- perpetually grey.

But not him.

His hair was long, disarrayed, and the color of a soft summer glow. His features were almost feminine, his body obviously lean under the baggie sweats. And his eyes- they were huge, innocent almost, and a shade of blue reminiscent of the lake Sasuke often waded into as a kid. There was life in those eyes- life that he had not seen in any of the other patients when they turned to look his way.

He wanted to be near him.

He wanted to destroy him.

And the longer those cerulean pools stared at him, the stronger that feeling became.

A feeling he had no interest in ignoring.

Sasuke clenched his jaw tight and made his way over to the blonde, never taking his eyes off of his face. They shifted momentarily to the scars on his cheeks, but didn’t stay there for long. It was his eyes that had Sasuke’s full attention, and his own shot back fast to find them.

Naruto rose to his feet at his approach, and Sasuke stepped close, towering over him. “What the fuck are you staring at?” he growled, choosing to ignore the fact that he was doing the exact same thing.

Naruto tilted his head, considering him. “I’m staring at you.”

Sasuke’s eyes visibly widened. What the hell is with this guy, he thought. What do I even say to that?

“Yeah, well, don’t” he spat, his eyes flashing with annoyance.

The blonde continued to stare despite his command and, just like before, felt no need to hide it. “Does it bother you?” he said quietly.

“That should be obvious.”

Naruto’s gaze seemed to soften, confusing the hostile raven even more.

“I’m just surprised..” Naruto murmured.

His hand reached up slowly and, in his curiosity, Sasuke just stood there and watched as it drew closer. He wondered what the blonde would do, and whether or not it would give him the perfect excuse to publicly tear him apart.

The cruel impulse faded and Sasuke’s shock grew as Naruto brought his hand to his face. His fingers gently slid down his cheek before falling back into his hair, teasing the silky strands by his neck- a sensation he wouldn’t soon forget.

Sasuke was temporarily at a loss for words. His heart seized in his chest and all he could do was hold his breath and stare back as the blonde studied him. As those lithe fingers made his whole body shudder.

“None of you have ever looked like this before..” Naruto said wistfully, his hand moving back to cradle the smooth porcelain face.

Sasuke’s brows furrowed, his confusion palpable. “What are you talking about?”

“Your eyes” Naruto murmured, his thumb lightly brushing beneath one as he spoke. “They’re.. they’re not like the others.”

Neither are yours.

The thought was abrupt and almost as shocking as the person caressing his face. Sasuke didn’t appreciate either one. He didn’t like that the person he was, the person he has always been, had inexplicably fallen to the wayside the moment this random stranger interacted with him. Sasuke wasn’t one to change- for anyone.

He wasn’t about to start now.

Sasuke roughly grabbed the blonde’s wrist and tore it away from his face, his grip firm and unyielding. “What makes you think you can touch me?” he snarled.

“Feels so real..” Naruto muttered to himself, his gaze shifting to the hand bruising his wrist. He looked up. “I wish it was.”

Sasuke blinked. “Are you fucking insane?!”

“Yes.”

He said it without hesitation, without embarrassment, as if he truly meant it and had wholly accepted it a long time ago. Sasuke nearly laughed at his candid response, another unfamiliar reaction- one that surprised and angered him further.

“Hey! What are you doing over there?!”

Sasuke turned his head to find two orderlies rushing towards them. His grip on the blonde tightened and he could see him wince from the corner of his eye.

He smirked.

Finally, a reaction he was used to.

“Fuck off” Sasuke shot back, knowing they wouldn’t but refusing to make it easier for them.

Someone grabbed him by the shoulder, and Sasuke released the blonde to spin around and throw his fist in their face. The man managed to dodge his attack and someone else grabbed the offending arm and wrenched it back.

Sasuke screamed in his fury, his eyes wild. “Get off me you bastard! Don’t touch me!!”

He kicked back and was immensely satisfied when his foot connected with the man’s shin. The guy groaned in pain, and a third orderly stepped up to assist the others.

Sasuke futilely lashed out, furious as they overpowered him and forced him to the ground. A man knelt beside him, a syringe in hand, and Sasuke’s rage burned through him.

“I’ll fucking kill you!” he screamed. “I will fucking kill all of you!!”

But of course, they ignored his threats.

Without a word the orderlies shoved his head to the side and sank the needle deep into his neck. They pushed down on the plunger, filling his veins with some concoction meant to sedate and tame him. He was revolted by the thought, and furious that it had come to this.

Sasuke jerked his head back to glare up at the blonde quietly observing all of it. “You’ll pay for this” he growled. “If you think this is over you are dead wrong.”

“I know it isn’t over” Naruto said, his voice faded and getting further and further away.

Sasuke wasn’t sure if it was the drug coursing through him that made the blonde sound that way, or if that truly was how he spoke. He opened his mouth, prepared to throw another threat his way, but the room was spinning and he quickly closed it to keep his breakfast in place. Sasuke breathed through the sudden nausea as the blonde’s voice floated over him once more. Just as soft, just as puzzling.

“They always come back.”

They..?

Sasuke’s thoughts stilled, his eyes rolled, and before he could process any of it, he fell back into a dark yawning abyss.

Naruto stared down at the man at his feet. He was disappointed to see heavy lids shut away those eyes he had been so enthralled by. He was tempted to drop down beside him and force them back to find them again, but he couldn’t seem to move. He was locked in place, silently watching as a team of orderlies lifted the raven off the floor and carried him out of the room.

Naruto just stood there- stock still, wishing he could break free of his paralysis and feeling powerless to even try. At least at first. But his trance melted away fast as a hand dropped onto his shoulder and reality shifted back into place. Naruto’s gaze slid from the orderlies’ retreating form to the fellow patient by his side.

Naruto never really got too close to anyone here before, but he recognized this one. He had seen him many times, and they had exchanged enough pleasantries and quiet nods to consider each other approachable. It was the closest thing to a friend that Naruto ever had.

Well.. if you only included the ones everyone else saw.

Naruto eyed the guy casually leaning against him, curious about his sudden appearance. He was about his same age, maybe a little younger. They were nearly the same height, though the other guy’s frame was noticeably more muscular than his own. His hair was just as wild and unruly as Naruto’s, the color a deep walnut brown- nearly the same shade as his eyes. He had red paint on his face and was either unaware of it or happy to become one with his latest art project. Knowing Kiba, both were entirely possible.

The brunette stared after the retreating orderlies, just as curious. “The new guy seems fun, huh.”

A split second later his words clicked.

Naruto spun around fast, unintentionally knocking away his hand in the process. He stared up at the brunette, a combination of shock and hope flashing in his huge blue eyes. “Wait, you can see him too?”

Kiba raised his brow, a grin tugging at his stained cheeks. “Wow. You really do belong in here.”

Naruto shrugged. Maybe, he thought.

But suddenly that didn’t seem like such a bad thing.

Chapter Text

“Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming..”

-Edgar Allan Poe

--

Kiba wandered off shortly after that and Naruto easily fell into the background once more, off the orderlies' radar. It didn’t last long.

He knew it wouldn’t.

Getting caught was always inevitable, but that just wasn’t enough of a hindrance to keep him from doing it in the first place. It didn’t matter how long it lasted, just as long as it happened.

When he skipped his meds, Naruto felt like he could finally breathe again. His mind filled with that familiar chaos he hated to be without, and he fully immersed himself in it. For as long as he could.

And the best way to do that was to slink off to the coziest corner he could find, tuck himself into it, and wait for the world to upend. Which is exactly what he did. Naruto watched the brunette skip over to a cart of art supplies, looked back down the now empty hall where the raven-haired stranger had been carried off, then turned to face the same chair that he has claimed everyday for the past year.

Naruto wasn’t a fan of this place, he was sure that was pretty apparent by now, but it did make his chest feel lighter everytime he saw his safe space unoccupied and untouched. The armchair was old and frail- a frayed, hunched over thing with lumpy cushions and a footrest that only came up about halfway. It was probably a vibrant shade of orange in its youth, but that brilliance had faded and darkened over time. Naruto liked the color. One that was reminiscent of corrosive rust, of an aged dying forest. It was oddly nostalgic for him. Comforting, even.

How strange, he thought, that something with that particular color would be my one bit of sanctuary. That death’s gnawing sienna would be the one place I’d go to reclaim life.

There was poetry in that, and Naruto quickly wrote it down before it managed to escape him.

Apart from occasionally rejecting his pills, writing was his one true pass time in the institution. It hadn’t always been. Naruto had started journaling on a whim, looking for something to pass the time, and he’s been doing so ever since. He found that it helped him cope with his newfound mental stability. It was the one place he could truly be his truest, darkest self, and he wholly embraced it.

He doubted that anyone else would find his scrawlings all that interesting, and he absolutely had no intention of sharing any of it, but it felt good to have it all the same. To have a place to tuck all of his unique thoughts into and know that it wouldn’t fade to nothingness. That he didn’t have to fully lose himself.

He had quite a few journals at this point, and never parted with his latest one. He reread it often, and everytime he did it felt new- like he was reading the private thoughts of a complete stranger. One he agreed with wholeheartedly. It made him feel less alone in this place, less alone in his head. The same way his illusions did, just with a little more control.

Knowing it’s value, its importance, Naruto always made sure to have a pen on hand and he wrote in it often. Consistency wasn’t something that he was typically great at, but it was strongly encouraged here and pretty thoroughly enforced. So the orderlies and psychiatrists never pried, never questioned his obsession. He supposed that was at least one good thing about living here.

Maybe the only one.

At least, until the raven-haired man showed up.

Naruto tucked his pen back into his spiral notebook and walked the rest of the way to his spot in the opposite corner of the room. He quickly took a seat, tucked the journal between the cushions for safe keeping, and pulled his legs up to join him. He wrapped his arms around his shins and did what he did best- he stared. And as he did, a new reality slowly began to unfurl.

It wasn’t all at once, and honestly it wasn’t all that disconcerting. At least, not at first.

Naruto never had any say in what appeared- what he heard or who manifested before him. Sadly, those things weren’t in his control. He would have loved to conjure up towering spruce trees all around himself, his very own forest with thick patches of grass to bury his feet into and crows for his imagined friend to tame. There’d be paint dripping from wildflowers that would have been a dream come true for Kiba, and music that required no instrument, no musician- just something in the wind that filled the senses and soothed his soul.

Yes, Naruto would’ve loved to create his own reality, but unfortunately it just didn’t work that way.

So instead of a beautiful serene forest, Naruto saw shadows. They danced against the walls, along the floor, pairing up like wisps of couples clinging to an echo of their past life. He was mesmerized by them, entranced. But his heart raced as they moved faster, panic setting in even before things took a turn for the worst. Like his body knew it would even before his mind did.

Naruto watched with growing fear as those shadows drew closer before merging into one, each pair finding the next, losing themselves in each other. Their forms twisted, elongated, and dark tendrils curled out from under them. They followed along the length of the floor, slowly moving towards him, intent on closing the distance. On consuming him next. 

Naruto held his breath, hoping to go unnoticed, knowing he wouldn’t. Whispers filled his head, quiet at first but rising fast until a cacophony of angry voices shrieked in his mind. Their anger and pain jolted through him, making him tremble and he couldn’t seem to stop.

Naruto buried his hands in his hair, gripping fistfuls of it, holding on for dear life as they screamed over and over. A fearsome roar cut through their cries as the beastly shadows closed in and Naruto’s own screams joined them. He closed his eyes and threw his head back as his terror ripped through his chest and tore from his throat. The others forced out more of them; he couldn’t stop.

He could feel hands grabbing him, pinning him down and he lashed out, fighting to get away. Naruto opened his eyes and found the shadows engulfing the orderlies, twisting their faces into inhuman masks without them knowing. Naruto shrank back from them, his screams lodging in the back of his throat, his overwhelming fear silencing him.

They shoved his head to the side, keeping him still, and his desperation broke through.

“Pl-please..”

Something shoved into his neck, invading his body. The shadows- they were being forced into him. Naruto fought harder, but he couldn’t stop them. They were inside. Dark splotches took over his sight, blinding him. The shadows drowned his thoughts, pulled him deeper inside, and he was too weak to stop it.

“Don’t let them take me” he gasped, his voice fading with the rest of him. “Please.. please don’t.. let them...”

His eyes rolled and he fell back into nothingness.

Just as the shadows intended.

--

Naruto woke up to the feel of unfamiliar hands on his body and immediately thought it was the shadows trying to find their way back inside. His eyes shot open fast. Orderlies hovered over him, their human faces back in place, only a hint of shadow beneath the surface. They were fastening thick leather straps to his wrists and ankles, binding him to a hospital cot. He could feel the starch sheet beneath him and cold hands above. Both made him flinch with discomfort.

“D-don’t..” he choked.

The men ignored him as they tightened the straps. They straightened before him and turned to each other.

“That sedative wasn’t strong enough” one murmured to the other. “I’ll grab a syringe- you keep an eye on him.”

“Sure thing.”

One man stepped out of the room and another stayed behind. His eyes dropped to the blonde and Naruto noticed something inside them that fueled his fear. There was something.. off about that look, and he immediately knew he wasn’t safe being alone with him. He couldn’t remember ever seeing this person before and briefly wondered if he was really there. If this person that clearly meant him harm only existed in his head.

Naruto closed his eyes, hoping to force him out of existence, but they quickly shot back open when he felt the cot dip down beside him.

The stranger sat next to him, reached for him. Naruto tried to shrink away from his touch, but his restraints only let him go so far. A hand slipped beneath his shirt, pushing the material up, exposing his torso and the shadows swirling above. Naruto stared down at both of them, equally horrified.

“N-no..”

Those long fingers slid along the waistband of his sweatpants, slowly finding their way inside. “Wait.. wait, wait, wa-”

“Alright, I think this will do the trick.”

The orderly hurriedly pulled his hand out of Naruto’s pants and yanked his shirt back down. His expression changed from malice to disinterest, a lie, as he pushed Naruto’s head to the side, exposing his neck. The other man didn’t question any of it. He simply walked over, pushed the needle inside, and sedated his patient once more.

“H-help..” Naruto said weakly.

The orderly slowly pulled the syringe free and patted the blonde on the shoulder. “Don’t worry kid, you’ll feel better in no time.”

No.. Naruto thought as another wave of darkness crashed over him. He looked over at the monster beside him and shuddered as he stared back.

I don’t think I will.

--

Naruto was locked in his room, which was more like a prison cell than anything else, for three days after that. His punishment for not taking his meds and for upsetting the other patients with his manic outburst. They let him out for bathroom breaks but escorted him to and from and always kept a firm grip on his arm.

Naruto had not seen the other orderly so far, but he had a feeling his luck wouldn’t last forever. He knew what that man wanted, and Naruto wasn’t sure he’d be able to stop him.

He considered asking for help, reporting what had happened, but he doubted that anyone would believe him. And even if they did, would they actually side with him over one of their own? For all he knew the rest of them were just like that, but had found other patients to target instead. He wondered if Kiba had also been put through this.

If the raven-haired patient had faced it.  

What would he say if he asked him? He had been so angry when Naruto stared at him, when he touched him. Would he help him?

Would he join in..?

The voices were gone, the hallucinations forced back to the far recesses of his mind, and Naruto felt more alone than ever. He wished he had someone to turn to, someone he could count on.

A friend.

The loneliness was closing in on him, swallowing him whole, and he silently pleaded for it to stop. For someone, anyone, to save him from this isolation.

He wished he hadn’t.

When they came in to bring him food, that man stepped into his cell, and Naruto’s panic got the best of him. He grabbed the fork beside his plate and lunged at him, the feeble plastic clenched tight in his fist. He would stab out those eyes that cut through him, that devoured him. A look he couldn’t stomach.

Eyes he couldn’t face for another second.

He managed to catch him off guard and knock him to the ground. The prongs were closing in fast, but the other orderly moved faster. He grabbed Naruto’s wrist and wrenched it back with brute force.

Naruto gasped as the man pulled him away, as he forced his arms behind his back. He bucked against him, snarling, feral in his rage, but the hold on him refused to relent. The man he despised rose to his feet and a hint of a smile flickered in his eyes as he faced off against the savage blonde.

“Let’s get him on the cot” he said with authority. “Looks like we’ll have to sedate him again.”

It didn’t take much to force him on his back and tie him down, and once again Naruto was in the same position he was before. The other orderly suggested staying with him, but the man insisted he’d stand guard and finally the other took the hint and went off in search of a syringe.

“That was a nice try, Naruto” the man whispered, “but it wasn’t enough.”

He palmed the blonde’s lap, eliciting a whimper in response. He seemed pleased by his reaction. But he clearly wanted more. A lot more. His hand slipped into his pants, under his boxers, and grabbed his length. Naruto froze, eyes wide and unblinking as he squeezed hard.

A cruel smile pulled at the man’s face, making him seem far less human than Naruto’s worst hallucinations. Naruto trembled as that sadistic grin drew closer, as the hand roughly jerked against him.

“You’ll be mine soon enough.”

--

Naruto jolted against his restraints as the lock on his door shifted with an audible click. He swallowed hard, willing his heart to stay in his chest as someone slipped into his room. He held his breath as the person turned the lock, sealing them both inside. Naruto wanted so badly for him to be a hallucination, for all of this to just stem from some demented part of his head, but the pills have been back in his system for days.

Everything about this was real.

Naruto opened his mouth, prepared to plead for mercy, struggling to find the right words to go in the right order, when he finally turned around to face him.

And it wasn’t the man he had been expecting.

A million questions flooded his mind all at once, and he was paralyzed under the onslaught. When he did finally find his voice, he settled on a question that was far less important than the rest.

“How did you get in here..?” 

The raven found his eyes and a smile pulled at his own. “I’d say you have bigger concerns” he said smoothly, taking a step forward. “Like, what am I going to do to you.” 

All the blood drained from Naruto’s face. He watched the raven who wasn’t an illusion move closer and despite his curiosity he couldn’t help but try to pull back from him- from that dark smile and the sharp glint in his eyes. Naruto knew that look, and hallucination or not it had always terrified him.

For good reason.

The raven stepped over to his cot and Naruto pulled closer to the wall. The clink of his restraints brought Sasuke’s attention to them and Naruto floundered for the right words, hoping to say something before his helplessness encouraged anything else.

“I-I’m sorry” he said weakly. “I really didn’t know..”

Dark eyes shot up and narrowed on his pallid face. “Didn’t know what?” he grated out.

“That you’re real.”

Sasuke stared at him, studying everything he could see and wondering over the things he couldn’t. “And what made you so sure that I wasn’t?” 

Naruto felt uncomfortable admitting it, but it didn’t look like he had a choice. The only way out of this was by being honest. He could, he would, but it was a hell of a lot easier to do when he wasn’t in his right mind.

“Well, the most interesting ones never are.”

“And what makes me so interesting.”

“Your eyes” Naruto said automatically.

Something dark slid over the raven’s features, warning Naruto to proceed with caution.

Sasuke’s lips curled as he spoke, but there was no humor behind it. “Because my eyes are so cold and unfeeling. Yes, I’ve heard this one before.”

Naruto shook his head. “No” he replied. “It’s their.. depth, I think. I was curious to know what’s inside.”

Obsidian pools hardened. “There’s nothing inside.”

“I don’t think that’s true.”

Sasuke stormed over, grabbed a fistful of the blonde’s shirt and yanked him up, forcing their faces close. Naruto gasped as Sasuke’s hold on him tested the restraints around his wrists, pulling him taut between the two of them.

“W-wait-”

“You want truth?” Sasuke snapped. “Here’s some truth- it’s your fault that I was locked in my fucking room for the last three days.”

His lips pulled back, revealing sharp canines and his serrated wrath- one that promised pain.

“And I’m going to make sure you regret it.”

Naruto tried to turn away from those dark vengeful eyes bearing down on him, but Sasuke grabbed his jaw fast and forced him back.

It was too late for him to look away now. 

“Don’t think you’re getting out of this one. I have you right where I want you.” 

Naruto swallowed, mind scrambling to find something to say, a way to calm his fury. “You were mad before I touched you” he pointed out. “Why?” 

“You were the one staring, asshole.”

“I told you- I thought you weren’t real.”

“Sure.”

“I’m schizophrenic!” Naruto shouted in his panic, seeing no way around it. “That’s not- its not uncommon for me, ok? I didn’t mean any offense by it.” 

The raven paused, seemingly taken aback by the admission. “You’re on meds.” 

“Only when I take them.”

Sasuke arched a brow. “Aren’t you the devious one..”

“Not everyone wants to be here” he said quietly. 

“And you think I do?” 

“I don’t know. Like I said, I just found out that you’re real.”

Sasuke leaned closer, his hair teasing the blonde’s face. “And what if I decide to punish you anyways?” 

Cerulean eyes widened, but the rest of his expression remained flat- his emotions trapped somewhere inside. 

“I can’t stop you.”

“No, you can’t.”

“But I.. I don’t want you to hurt me.”

Something tightened in Sasuke’s gut, something akin to guilt. He didn’t like it, but it did affect him nonetheless.

His hold on the blonde loosened and he simply watched as he slipped from his grasp and dropped back onto the cot. Naruto winced, shutting his eyes long enough to break their trance on the raven. Sasuke slid his gaze lower, shifting to the scars.

“Did someone do those to you?” he said quietly. “Or did you do them to yourself?” 

Naruto’s brows furrowed. He slowly opened his eyes, but kept them downcast, avoiding the raven’s penetrating stare and all the things he didn’t want to see inside.

“Does it matter?” he murmured.

Sasuke glared at him, irritated that he kept those eyes hidden- that he refused to look at him, to answer him. He wouldn’t tolerate that from anyone.

The blonde was no exception.

Sasuke grabbed his jaw hard and jerked his head up, forcing their eyes to meet. He saw fear in those cerulean pools and pushed down the fresh guilt it elicited.

“Answer me” he growled. “Who was it that cut your face like that- you or someone else?”

Naruto gave him a pained look. “Both.”

Sasuke sat back, his hand slipping from his face. He didn’t know what to say to that so he said nothing, but that didn’t keep him from wondering about it. He wanted to know what he meant, but he wasn’t willing to push further. He didn’t want him to think that he cared. In fact, he didn’t want to care at all.

Sasuke dragged his fingers through his hair, forcing back long ebony strands and swirling thoughts. He sighed then glanced back down at the bound blonde before him. “I don’t even know your name..” he muttered.

“It’s Naruto.”

“I never said I wanted to know it.”

Naruto dropped his gaze, and Sasuke took the moment of reprieve to study his face. “I didn’t expect to see you like this” he said slowly.

His eyes slipped lower, finding their way to the cot Naruto was forced down on, the straps cinched tight around his wrists and ankles. On closer inspection he could see deep bruises circling beneath each band. Like Naruto had fought like hell to be free of them.

His eyes narrowed.

“How long have you been like this?”

“Schizophrenic? Or locked up in an asylum?”

A vein in Sasuke’s jaw clicked. “I meant how long have you been restrained to this cot?”

Those blue eyes shot up and landed on his furrowed brows, his inky-black stare, the tightness around his mouth as he clenched his jaw, but he didn’t speak. How could he? Naruto had never seen that kind of concern- from anyone. It was so foreign to him he barely recognized it.

“Answer me” Sasuke growled, irritated that he had to keep demanding for him to do so every time he asked a question.

“I.. don’t know” Naruto admitted. “A while, I guess.”

“You guess.”

“Well, they didn’t exactly leave a clock.”

Sasuke looked less than amused.

The more the raven thought about all of this the more pissed off he became. And while it didn’t take much to send the Uchiha into a downward spiral, he felt like he could justify it this time. Those bruises- they spoke volumes. Something wasn’t right here, and he intended on finding out what.  

“Why would they leave you like this?”

“I tried to stab someone’s eyes out” Naruto replied, choosing to be honest and to finally answer his questions without further prompting.

Sasuke arched a brow. “With what?”

“A fork.”

“What made you decide to do that?” Sasuke asked.

“You don’t seem surprised” Naruto said instead, avoiding the subject.

“Aren’t schizophrenics usually violent?”

Naruto glared at him, annoyed by the assumption. “Then what’s your excuse?”

Sasuke looked amused by his sudden fire. And more than that, he seemed to approve of it. “Is there a reason you’re avoiding telling me?”

Naruto’s unabashed, unblinking stare made a full return- a habit he has never been able to shake. Sasuke’s heart hammered violently against his chest in response but he couldn’t exactly explain why. Something about it just..

It got to him.

He wasn’t sure how to put it into words, but it came with a rush of new feelings- emotions he wasn’t sure he was ready to face.

“Yes” Naruto finally replied.

Sasuke gave him a curious look. “Are you going to tell me that reason?”

“I’m not sure.”

“Why’s that?”

Naruto gnawed at his lip, and now Sasuke was the one who couldn’t look away. He found himself unconsciously licking his own as Naruto’s teeth worried at his bottom lip. When he realized what he was doing he quickly pulled his tongue back inside and looked away.

“I don’t think you’d care” Naruto said, his voice low, dejected, drawing the raven back to him.

“You’re right” Sasuke said, his voice sharper than he meant for it to be. “I don’t care. About anything.”

“I would tell you if you weren’t real..” Naruto said almost wistfully.

“Is that so..”

The blonde nodded, his eyes still locked on the person who wasn’t a hallucination, and yet still felt far from real.

“And why’s that?” Sasuke pressed.

“They listen.”

The raven grated his teeth together, eyes flashing. “And what am I doing right now?” he snapped.

“You came in here to hurt me” Naruto pointed out.

“And your illusions never want to hurt you?”

Naruto couldn’t deny that he had a point. “But they..”

“They what?”

“They always come back.”

“And that’s a good thing?”

Naruto’s brows furrowed over his never-ending stare, pain flickering in their depths. “Sometimes.”

Sasuke felt his anger slip to the wayside, which was a pretty rare occurrence for him. Without a word he carefully unbuckled the straps around Naruto’s wrists and ankles, freeing him from the cot he never should have been tied down to in the first place. One he was clearly desperate to escape.

He watched Naruto slowly sit up, rubbing circulation back into his hands, wincing as he pressed down on the deep purple splotches marring his wrists.

“You were afraid of something” Sasuke said, another thought he hadn’t meant to say out loud.

“Yes.”

It still surprised Sasuke how honest Naruto was, how utterly unfiltered his replies were. If he asked the right questions he was sure he really would tell him everything. What a wonderful, dangerous thing to be. He decided to push those boundaries, to test that theory even further.

“Of someone.”

Sasuke could have almost sworn that he saw tears but Naruto must have blinked them away before he could get a better look. It already answered his question, but the truthful blonde once again forced down his walls and answered him.

“Yes.”

“You know what, Naruto.”

The blonde tilted his head, his focus still wholly on the raven perched on his bed. He looked so hopeful, so innocent, and it clawed at Sasuke like nothing else ever had. His eyes hardened, and with it his newfound resolve.

“I think I just found a new target.”

“Instead of me” Naruto said, filling in the gaps.

Something dangerous flitted across those dark pools, a flash of malice. Naruto was relieved to not be on the receiving end of it.

“I think it’s about time I got my hands on a fork.”

Chapter Text

"We’re all mad here. I’m mad. You’re mad.”
“How do you know I’m mad?” said Alice.
“You must be,” said the Cat, “or you wouldn’t have come here.”

-Alice in Wonderland

--

Sasuke slipped out of Naruto’s room just as soundlessly as he had entered it, making sure to lock the door behind him as he left. Naruto continued to stare well after he was already gone, absolutely confounded after his visit. Even more so than he was when he first discovered that the raven-haired stranger wasn’t a hallucination.

It just didn’t make sense.

The guy had been so angry with him before, practically ready to tear him apart. He had even snuck into his room with the sole intention of hurting him, and yet the way he left..

The raven was still angry, that much was clear, but it was different now. His fury wasn’t directed at Naruto. Rather he seemed angry for him. Like he wanted to protect him.

But why..?

Why would he suddenly care what happens to me?

It didn’t make sense and no matter how much it swirled around in his brain he just couldn’t find any reason behind it. Or maybe he didn’t want to..

Maybe he was afraid to.

Naruto let out a deep sigh and turned onto his side, facing away from the door and the echo of the raven that had just left it. His eyes slowly closed, lids falling with the weight of the heavy feelings that had pummeled into him over the course of the day. His anxiety still gnawed at a corner of his mind, but exhaustion had it beat and soon he was sinking into a new darkness- one he welcomed with open arms. And in it he found reprieve from all that had tormented him while he was awake. The nightmares stayed buried, lost somewhere thankfully out of reach, and instead all he saw were two obsidian eyes filled with warmth.

Naruto smiled as he plunged headfirst into oblivion.

--

Naruto was startled awake by the abrupt slam of his door and the sudden gruff voice of a rugged-looking orderly. His eyes narrowed on the blonde, before shooting over to the men standing beside him.

“How the hell did he get out of his restraints?” he snapped.

The others shuffled their feet, but they didn’t answer him. It only served to piss him off more.

“Are you two listening?!” he shouted. “Who the fuck authorized this?!”

“I’m- I’m not sure” one of them finally answered. “Someone from the night crew must have-”

“Find out who did it and have them fired” the burly orderly snarled.

His cohort paled. “Asuma, you know I don’t have the authority to do that.”

“You do now” he growled. “Go. Both of you.”

The two seemed eager to obey that order at least. Without a word or second glance they rushed from Naruto’s room and disappeared down the hall.

The man, Asuma, turned back to the blonde, his eyes brimming with rage. Naruto slowly sat up, his eyes locked on those fiery orbs, unable to look away.

“Did you do this?" Asuma forced out between clenched teeth.

Naruto shook his head, his stare as persistent as his silence.

The man looked doubtful but didn’t comment on it. He gave a heavy sigh and dragged hand down his face, already exasperated with the day. He checked his watch. And it’s only eight AM.

Fantastic.

Asuma eyed the blonde for a few more seconds before finally giving in. He came here to collect him anyways, and it didn’t look like he was out of control or anything. There was no point in restraining him, let alone locking him away again.

Fuck it.

His mind made up, Asuma walked over to the small blonde. He unceremoniously grabbed him by the arm and easily hefted him to his feet. Panic flitted across Naruto’s stare, but otherwise he didn’t respond to his forcefulness. The orderly stepped back across the room and out the door, dragging the patient with him.

“W-where are you taking me?” Naruto finally managed to say.

The orderly glanced over his shoulder briefly before turning back to the long corridor before them. “Bathroom” he muttered. “Then the community room.”

Naruto’s heart sped up. “I can leave my room?”

“For now.”

Then maybe I’ll be able to see him again.

Naruto silently promised himself he’d find out his name when he did. There were only so many times he could think of him as the raven-haired stranger. If he was supposed to see him as a real person, he needed to know his real name.

Naruto freshened up quickly, eager to get to the community space. His chair was there, his journal hopefully still tucked inside, and there was someone he was inexplicably excited to see.

Naruto wondered if he felt the same way as him and decided there was definitely a possibility of that. While there was still a chance that the raven was angry at him all over again, there was also a distinct possibility that he was still feeling protective of him. Meaning he’d want to get close.

Maybe even be his friend.

Naruto didn’t want to get his hopes up, but for some reason the thought of being friends with the raven filled him with a rush of new feelings. They weren’t unpleasant necessarily, but they were definitely unfamiliar, and he didn’t really know what to make of it. He had not considered being friends with any of the other patients before, not even Kiba even though he was someone he got along with fairly well. He just couldn’t help but keep his distance from them. All of them. And yet with this man it was different. He couldn’t explain it, but he felt some sort of compulsion to be near him, a desire stronger than anything he’s felt in a very long time.

And he didn’t want to ignore it.

--

When Naruto finally made it back to the main room, he was disappointed to find that there was no sign of his potential friend. He had unknowingly built-up hope of seeing him and now was left feeling hollow.

Naruto tried not to think about that as he padded across the expansive room and over to his chair. He dropped down on it and ran his hand down between the cushions. He breathed an audible sigh of relief when his fingertips skimmed across the top of his notebook. He didn’t know what he would have done if it went missing.

Naruto pulled the journal free from his lumpy orange companion and settled back against the chair as he pulled his pen free and flipped to a fresh page. He tapped the pen against his chin, considering what he wanted to say, then brought it to paper and let his mind unravel all over it.

He was so focused on his manic ramblings that he didn’t hear footsteps approaching. And he failed to notice the person hovering beside him. At first. When he did finally notice, it startled him immensely. Naruto flinched and his eyes shot up fast to find two curious dark orbs staring down at him.

“Naruto.”

Naruto snapped his notebook closed, his face flush with sudden inexplicable embarrassment.

The raven quirked a brow at his reaction. “Got something to hide?”

“Doesn’t everyone?”

Sasuke couldn’t help but smirk at that, and decided to let the blonde keep his secrets.

For now.

He sat on the arm of the chair beside him without invitation, settling in as the blonde continued to stare at him. “Was there something you wanted to say?” the raven inquired.

As a matter of fact, there was. And Naruto had been looking for the perfect opening to do just that. “Yes” he said quickly. “What’s your name?”

Sasuke studied him for a moment before answering. “Why?”

Naruto stared up at him, those wide blues just as captivating as they were the first time he saw them. Sasuke narrowed his eyes, refusing to let himself get pulled in, refusing to acknowledge that it was a battle that he was not going to win.

“Real people have names” Naruto said simply.

Sasuke couldn’t help but laugh at that- a reaction he was not very familiar with. “Still think I’m a hallucination?”

“Maybe a little.”

The raven leaned back against the chair, laying his head against the soft backing as he turned his eyes up to the overarching ceiling above. “Sasuke” he said quietly. “My name is Sasuke.”

“Sasuke..” Naruto repeated, familiarizing himself with the syllables, the feel of it on his tongue. “Thank you, Sasuke.”

Dark orbs found him once more, brows drawn in puzzlement. “For what?”

Naruto glanced around, making sure there were no orderlies within earshot before whispering, “for untying me last night”.

“I’m sure you would have done the same for me” he said sarcastically.

“I would.”

Sasuke propped his elbow against the chair, his head against his hand as he turned to face the blonde. “You know, you’re surprisingly honest.”

Naruto tilted his head, the question written all over his face before he even asked it. “Why is that surprising?”

“It seems like you have a lot to hide.”

“Does it?”

“Unless you just go around telling the whole world that you’re schizophrenic and played a part in cutting up your face.”

Naruto flinched back and gave him a horrified look, like Sasuke had struck him.

Like he had hurt him.

Fuck.

“Naruto, look, I-”

“How could you say that to me?”

Sasuke sat up, his heavy sigh filled with regret. “Because I’m an asshole.”

Naruto rose to his feet, his notebook clasped close to his chest, anchoring him. He knew his face was a blank emotionless slate, but their were so many feelings rolling through him, forceful and relentless, and he didn’t know how to handle them. He had faced so much hate, so much criticism for who he is, things beyond his control. But this was someone he had hoped would be his friend.

“I thought you were different” he said sadly, still unable to look away. But he wanted to.

For the first time since he met Sasuke, he didn’t want to look at him at all.

"I guess you really are real."

Sasuke got to his feet at that and took a step towards the blonde, but Naruto shyed away from him. He scrambled back to keep even more distance between them and Sasuke’s steps faltered. He was surprised by the pain he saw, and more so by his reaction to it. How seeing Naruto like that seemed to tear a gaping hole through his chest.

He wanted to take it back, to fix what he had broken, but Naruto clearly didn’t want him to. Sasuke felt stuck. He considered closing the space between them anyways, ignoring what he wanted, but he didn’t want to scare Naruto. Sasuke was aggressive, impatient, constantly angry, but there were still times when he regretted being so rash and abrasive.

This was definitely one of those times.

“Naruto-”

The blonde just shook his head and finally managed to turn away from him, and Sasuke let him. The remorseful raven watched as the person he had so callously hurt walked to the far side of the room over to a small alcove. The blonde tucked himself inside, curled up tight. He wrapped his arms around himself and buried his head in his arms- unable to do much else to escape him.

Guilt seized the raven, and he didn’t know what to do with it. So for a while he just stood there, staring after him.

Just like Naruto always did.

And he couldn’t help but wish that he would raise his head and do it all over again.

--

Sasuke lasted all of about twenty minutes until he just couldn’t stand it for another second.

He wasn’t one to beg for attention or to apologize for shit, no matter how badly he fucked up. And yet here he was, prepared to do just that.

So far, he was not a fan.

He didn’t know what to say, how to make his face look apologetic instead of royally pissed, and he didn’t know how to get the blonde to look up at him without just reaching out and forcing him to. Just stay calm, Sasuke reminded himself. You’re the asshole here, not him. Be patient. Be calm.

Self-talk had never been all that useful in the past, but he figured it was worth a shot considering all the other new things he was trying.

And for what? Some fucking blonde I don’t even know? A guy in a fucking insane asylum?

He’s no one to me.

No one.

Even as he thought it, Sasuke knew he didn’t mean it. Naruto had already managed to crawl his way under his skin and burrow in his mind, like a fucking louse. He couldn’t just look the other way. For any of it.

Sasuke slowly approached the despondent blonde, reminding his face to stop scowling as he moved closer. He could see Naruto stiffen as he stopped in front of him, but he didn’t try to get away. In fact, aside from the tension in his body he didn’t do anything. Sasuke wasn’t so sure that that was a good sign, but at least it made him easier to approach.

He took a knee in front of him and slowly reached out. Sasuke paused, his hand poised over his arm, waiting. “Naruto” he said quietly.

The blonde scooted further back, pressing himself firmly against the wall. He didn’t look up.

Sasuke let his hand fall back to his side.

“I’m sorry” he murmured. “I shouldn’t have said that.”

He waited, growing impatient with every passing second, and finally Naruto lifted his head. His eyes were dark, heavy with the weight of everything in his mind. Sasuke hated knowing that he put it there.

“I thought you said you found a new target.”

The raven clenched his jaw hard, forcing back the sudden burst of anger flaring up inside of him. “And I meant it” he grated out.

Naruto stared at him, noticing the anger and his crumbling control over it.

“Are you always angry?”

“Yes.”

Naruto bit his lip, considering him as he searched for the words still scrambled in his thoughts. “Can you.. direct it towards someone else..?”

It took everything in Sasuke not to implode on the spot. Somehow he managed to regain enough control to force out a relatively calm response. “I’ll.. try.”

Naruto nodded and Sasuke, eager to take his rage out on something, asked, “have you seen him? The guy who hurt you?”

Those captivating blues widened. “I never told you he hurt me.”

“It wasn’t hard to guess.”

Something lodged in the back of Naruto’s throat, and he did his best to shove it back down. “I.. I haven’t seen him” he choked.

Sasuke noticed immediately, but he didn’t say anything about it. Instead, he rose to his feet and held out his hand. “Come on” he said, as gently as he could.

Naruto eyed his hand suspiciously. “Where?”

“Back to your favorite spot.”

Naruto studied him, his curiosity peaked once more. “And how do you know it’s my favorite spot?”

“I just do.”

Naruto considered him a moment longer before finally placing his hand in Sasuke’s, letting him pull him to his feet. “Where will you be sitting?” Naruto asked.

His looked down. Sasuke had yet to release his hand.

When he looked back up he found a smile waiting for him.

“With you, obviously.”

Naruto blinked. “Is it obvious?”

Sasuke slowly reeled him in, watching his eyes find his again, flickering between them, desperately trying to read them as he drew closer.

“It should be" he breathed.

“Are you.. trying to be my friend?” Naruto asked, surprised that he found the nerve to say it.

Friend, huh.

“And if I was?” Sasuke asked.

“I.. don’t really know how to do that” Naruto admitted.

Something sinister flashed in the raven’s eyes, just for a moment, before disappearing entirely. But Naruto had definitely seen it. And he wasn’t sure what to make of it.

“Don’t worry, Naruto” he said slyly.

“I’ll teach you.”

Chapter Text

“I’m thinking of a queer feeling I sometimes get..”

-Brave New World

--

(Pun intended.)

--

“Sasuke..”

“Hm?”

“Do you.. umm.. have to be this close?”

The raven internally smirked, thoroughly enjoying how easy it was to toy with the naïve blonde. In fact, he was quite curious to see just how much he could get away with. Of course, he wasn’t stupid enough to show it.

That would spoil all the fun.

Sasuke made sure to keep his face neutral, willed his eyes to be less transparent, and turned to give his little friend an indecipherable look.

“I thought you wanted to be friends” he said innocently.

Those brilliant blues widened a couple notches, and Sasuke knew he had him.

“I- I do!”

“Then what’s the problem?”

Sasuke turned towards the blonde with some degree of difficulty. He was intent on looking at him as they spoke further, but the space they had left between them was.. minimal to say the least. Naruto’s favorite spot was a pretty tight one, and Sasuke had a feeling his would be as well.

He barely managed to keep the impish grin from his face at the thought, but a flash of his internal wickedness flickered in his eyes and he knew Naruto had seen it. The blonde never looked away from his face- it was hard to keep him from seeing a lot of things.

Naruto knitted his brows, his confusion apparent. “What does that mean?” he wondered aloud.

“What does what mean?” Sasuke said, leaning in to invade his territory even more.

Naruto’s eyes flitted between his own, attempting to decode the truth buried inside. “Why do you look at me like that..?”

“This is just how friends look at each other.”

Sasuke lifted a hand to Naruto’s hair, fingering its soft ends. He watched him closely, craving a reaction. The blonde beside him seemed to be a little perplexed by it, but that wasn’t what Sasuke was looking for. He pushed his hand deeper, tangling his fingers in heavy blonde strands, and Naruto shivered against him.

That’s more like it.

“Do I make you nervous?” Sasuke murmured, trying not to sound thrilled by the prospect.

Naruto’s throat constricted, but he managed to force out his answer.

“Yes.”

Sasuke smiled.

Good.

--

“Doctor, we weren’t expecting you.”

Said doctor slid his dark gaze over to the two orderlies who had been slouching back against the wall, gossiping over their coffee and completely unaware of their surroundings. A third was approaching and quickened his pace at the sight of him, alarmed to find him there first.

Clearly, he thought.

“Always appreciate a warm welcome” he said instead, humor in his eyes and a feigned lightness in his voice.

His staff laughed along with him, their relief apparent, which instantly annoyed him. But, as usual, he kept it to himself. Because Kakashi Hatake knew how to maintain his composure, especially when it benefited those around him.

Unlike a certain someone.

Speaking of which, where is our newest patient..

Onyx eyes slipped over an assortment of individuals, seeking out his latest case. When he did finally spot him, he was surprised to find him sitting comfortably with one of his other patients. It was an odd site, especially considering who he was sitting with.

“Care to explain what’s happening over there?” Kakashi asked the trio before him, nodding to the two tucked cozily into a ragged orange chair at the far end of the room.

One of the orderlies- Mizuki, a man with similar hair color but far colder eyes- stepped forward and joined him. He looked over at the pair as he answered. “Ah, yeah, those two. We were as surprised as you are-”

I doubt that.

“You wouldn’t know it by looking at them now,” Mizuki went on, “but there was a fight between them just a few days ago.”

Kakashi raised a brow as he continued to study the pair. “Really..”

“Yep. Had to sedate the new kid- he’s one hell of a spitfire.”

“I see.” Kakashi rubbed his chin, his curiosity peaked. “And when did this start happening?” he said, referring to the two practically joined at the the hip.

“This morning. They’ve been in that chair together for the better part of an hour.”

“And you didn’t think to separate them?”

Mizuki shrugged. “There haven’t been any problems. And it’s just two guys, we didn’t really see a need to split them up.”

The orderly paused and turned to look up at his boss like he just realized who he had been so casually talking to. “Wait, do you think we should?”

Kakashi pondered that for a moment. There were definitely a few reasons to be wary of those two getting too close. Mainly because Sasuke’s condition, if not closely monitored and controlled, could put Naruto at risk. And because of Naruto’s condition, he may not realize it until it had already gotten out of hand.

The Uchiha was a rather interesting case, to say the least, which is what brought Kakashi out here in the first place. He had just finished looking over his paperwork, and was curious to see him for himself, to observe his behavior in person. The papers he had been reading over noted the Uchiha to be highly aggressive, manipulative, and easily agitated. There were several reports of him lashing out in a violent rage, including occasions that didn’t seem to have any cause for such a response. He has been accused of coercion, extreme possessiveness, and it was emphasized that his temper was consistently explosive.

Kakashi also noticed that this was not Sasuke’s first time in an institution. In fact, he had been sent here because the last one couldn’t handle him. Nor the one before that. Which is exactly what sparked Kakashi’s interest in him in the first place. What can he say- he’s a sucker for those deemed ‘a lost cause’.

But what really made Kakashi curious about this particular patient wasn’t his volatile nature, his rage, no. It was another note he had found in his file- one he had never, in all his years, come across before.

People, medical professionals included, seemed to be under the impression that Sasuke Uchiha did not have a conscience at all.

It wasn’t everyday you opened your doors to a patient like that.

At first Kakashi waved away the accusation, deciding that such a diagnosis was a bit overzealous for his taste. But the more he read into him, the more he wondered if he had been too hasty to disregard it.

Sasuke Uchiha had, on numerous occasions, manipulated people around him into doing things they clearly were not comfortable with- crimes they didn’t want to commit, deeds they otherwise wouldn’t have done. Apparently, he could be quite persuasive. And when that didn’t work his violent outbursts more than made up for it. These were warning signs for sure, but the part that really concerned anyone who got close enough to see it was that Sasuke always did these things with a smile- a cold, calculating smile.

Kakashi narrowed his eyes, watching closely as the raven sank his hand into his companion’s hair, pulling him close to murmur something in his ear. Even from where he stood, Kakashi could see Naruto’s discomfort and he unconsciously took a step towards them, prepared to save him from it. But his next step faltered as Sasuke leaned back and a small smile pulled at those scarred cheeks.

Emotions were something that Naruto Uzumaki felt just as strongly as anyone else, but it was a constant uphill battle for him when it came to expressing them. His eyes revealed plenty if you knew what to look for, but his expressions were typically flat, his responses seemingly cold. And yet..

He smiled at him.

Sasuke, the patient that might not have a conscience to speak of, had somehow managed to bring a smile to Naruto’s face. One that Kakashi had never seen there before.

“Now that is interesting..”

He turned to his attending staff. “Leave them be for now” he instructed, “but keep an eye on them. If things seem like they’re getting out of hand, separate them immediately.”

The orderly beside him quirked a brow at that, clearly trying to read between the lines as he spoke, but Kakashi wasn’t inclined to explain any further.

“Have Sasuke Uchiha brought to my office in an hour.”

The three nodded and with one last look at his patients, Kakashi turned and strode off.

The trio glanced over at each other, each as confused as the last. “What do you think that was about?”

Mizuki gestured to the boys in question. They were still pressed close in the chair they were determined to share, but he couldn’t seem to find anything suspicious about it. Maybe he was missing something?

“Do you think we should actually be worried about that? I mean, if they’re not fighting does it really matter? Guys can be like that sometimes.”

One of the other orderlies cleared his throat, and the other two immediately turned to look at him. The brunette blushed at their sudden attention, a soft pink that streaked across the freckles on his cheeks, the scar across the bridge of his nose.

“It might not be as innocent as it looks” he said, feeling awkward saying it out loud.

The boisterous orderly arched a brow. “Meaning what, Iruka?”

Iruka glanced over at the patients again, noting their never-ending eye contact, the hand confidently pressed down on the blonde’s thigh.

“Well.. I’d say Sasuke Uchiha is far more interested in Naruto than we thought.”

“You mean he’s gay?!” Mizuki spat, his disgust apparent.

Iruka clenched his jaw hard, forcing back the impulse to strangle the homophobe. “Is there a problem with that?”

Mizuki must have caught the anger in his voice and was slowly putting together why it might be there to begin with. He looked away, but the revulsion on his face never left. “Not at all” he said, though he did take a step back from Iruka, and it was easy to see why.

The third orderly, clearly uncomfortable with the sudden tension between them, interjected before it could get worse. “I think we should make a few rounds, hm?”  

He clapped Iruka on the shoulder, a gesture of solidarity.

“Kakashi said to leave them be for now, and I think that’s what we should do.”

Iruka and Mizuki both nodded in agreement, though they avoided looking at each other and were quick to walk in opposite directions as they moved through the community room.

Fucking bastard, Iruka thought, his nerves still vibrating with pent-up fury. Who the hell is he to judge?!

He waved at a few patients, trying his best not to look aggravated as he did. He walked on, still too emmersed in his thoughts to interact any further than that.

Bet he wouldn’t act all high and mighty if he knew about Kakashi.

It wasn’t his place, and Iruka would never out someone even if it was, but that didn’t mean it didn’t bring him great joy to imagine that prick walking in on their boss cock deep in some other guy.

Iruka’s amusement slipped, and suddenly a whole new focus came to mind.

Kakashi.

The thought of walking into Kakashi’s office with the bastard he hated suddenly consumed him. Of seeing his boss with his pants down around his ankles, a guy shoved face down on his desk in front of him, crying out as Kakashi thrust into his hole from the back. Over and over, his pace vicious, relentless..

He could imagine Kakashi moaning in ecstasy, the sound of it deep and guttural, primal, as he gripped the desk for leverage and fucked his partner harder.

The abrupt fantasy changed and instead of merely watching as a shocked bystander, Iruka pictured himself forced down on that desk. He imagined Kakashi’s bare thighs trapping him against it, his powerful hands gripping his hips as he drilled into him without abandon.

Iruka’s mouth suddenly went bone dry, and he quickly rushed off to the bathroom before things got any worse. There was no way in hell he’d be able to justify getting an erection while he was surrounded by patients.

Iruka kept his clipboard over his lap as he weaved his way to the bathrooms and hurriedly stumbled inside. Hands trembling, he quickly locked the door, relieved that all of their bathrooms were single stall. He unfastened his pants and shoved them down his shaky thighs, then turned on the sink.

His cock throbbed as that same image echoed through him. He could almost feel it- it was just so real. Kakashi’s fist wrapped around his hair, his hips slamming him against the desk, his thick length buried deep inside, filling him. Crying out in pain and passion as Kakashi thrust into him over and over, fucking him harder, making his screams shrill.

Iruka closed his eyes tight and jerked his hand up and down his cock as he fell deep into his fantasy. He breathed Kakashi’s name as his climax tore through him and shot his release into the sink, then slowly opened his eyes.

Iruka froze. He stared down at his hand, sticky with cum, then looked up at his reflection.

“What the hell is wrong with you?”

He wasn’t a patient here, so his reflection didn’t have any answers to give. It just stared back at him with that same flushed face.

Shame curdled in his gut and climbed up the back of his throat, bringing tears to his eyes. Iruka forced all of it back down then dropped his head.

“God, what the fuck am I doing..”

--

Naruto’s chest squeezed tight and all of the butterflies fluttering inside were instantly crushed. His hand lurched out and he grabbed Sasuke’s wrist hard, forcing his wandering hand to still on his upper thigh.

“Wh-what are you doing?”

The tips of Sasuke’s fingers climbed higher, testing their restraint while the raven completely abandoned his own.

“It’s ok, Naruto” he murmured, “Friends can be playful with each other like this.”

He lowered his face, bringing his mouth close to the blonde’s neck, his breath sliding down its length, slipping beneath his loose shirt. Sasuke eyed Naruto’s exposed collarbone before lifting his gaze to his face once more, a mischievous grin pulling at his own.

“Can’t they?”

He was tempted- to lick a trail along the base of Naruto’s neck, to bite down hard on his throat and draw blood. To throw him down and savagely dominate him in front of everyone.

Anger and desire swirled into one, and Sasuke’s control over all of it was wavering fast.

How long until Naruto realized what he was really up to? What he was tempted to do to him? It might not matter. Sasuke wasn’t sure he could hold out for much longer.

“How about you let me play a little more, hm?”

Sasuke shoved his hand higher up Naruto’s leg, his fingers moving to his inner thigh.

“D-don’t” Naruto gasped, “don’t do what he-”

Sasuke’s head shot up fast. “He?! Who the fuck is he?”

Naruto shrank back from his anger, surprised to see it. “The one who..”

“Hurt you” Sasuke filled in for him. Then everything clicked and his anger skyrocketed. “Did he fucking touch you?!”

Huge blue eyes stared up at him, brimming with horror. “Sasuke-”

The raven leapt to his feet and roughly grabbed the blonde to force him to his own. He yanked Naruto close, teeth bared, rage seething. “Did he touch you?! Answer me!!”

Sasuke jerked him to the side and slammed him up against the wall. Naruto winced then quickly opened his eyes to find Sasuke’s again. He couldn’t speak. The words were disjointed, half buried in his mind, and he couldn’t find the ones he needed.

But Sasuke wasn’t willing to wait.

He pulled Naruto towards him then slammed him into the wall again as a savage scream tore through him. “Tell me what the fuck he did to you!!”

Several hands wrapped around the raven and forced him back, separating him from the stunned blonde. His blonde. And Sasuke couldn’t accept that.

“Get off me! Get the fuck off of me! Don’t touch him! He’s mine! He’s mine- don’t touch him!!”

The orderlies struggled to gain control and ended up shoving him face down against the tile floor, pinning him to it as they scrambled to ready an injection. Sasuke screamed, his eyes wild as they sought out the blonde again.

“He won’t touch you” he growled up at him. “I won’t fucking let him.”

Naruto stood frozen in place, staring down at the raven at his feet. He had never seen him like this. Sasuke had been angry when they first met, but this- this was something else. The things he was saying.. they overwhelmed him.

Scared him.

Naruto had never seen this Sasuke before, and he was having a hard time understanding him now that he did. “Sasuke..?”

Some hint of clarity flickered in those dark eyes, but it didn’t last long. The beast manifesting behind them fell back into place, feral in its wrath. The orderlies shoved a needle in his arm, but Sasuke didn’t even react to it. His focus was on Naruto. And only Naruto.

“You are mine” Sasuke growled.

Naruto flinched.

“I won’t let him touch.. what’s.. mine…”

Sasuke’s body went limp, and his head dropped to the floor with a resounding thump.

Naruto swallowed hard as those words echoed in his head over and over. But they weren’t the only ones. Someone else’s words slid inside and once they were there, he couldn’t get them out. No matter how badly he wanted to.

You’ll be mine soon enough.

Naruto recoiled from that voice, colliding with the wall behind him. He sank down to the floor and grabbed his head, his nails digging into his scalp. The pressure in his skull, the voices, it was too much.

Too much.

Too much.

He rocked back and forth, trying to soothe himself as he fought to gain control of the voices, but they just kept getting louder. A sob tangled in his throat, making it hard to breathe. He could feel the room, the world, closing in on him and he couldn’t stop it.

“Naruto.”

Make it stop. Just please make it stop.

“Naruto, look at me.”

No more. No more. No-

A hand on his face startled him, and he jolted back as it forced his chin up.

“Naruto, do you recognize me?”

The blonde trembled. He tried to compartmentalize all the different sounds happening at once, but it was too much. He couldn’t pull them apart. The voices, the memories, the screams- they all merged into one and everything else was quickly consumed by it.

He shook his head, his hands gripping his hair. He just wanted to pull all of the voices out of his fucking head. He needed them out.

“Take them out.. please, please, just get them out..”

“Naruto, look at me. What is my name?”

A broken sob tore through his chest and shot out of him, but it left the voices behind. Still trapped inside. He could hear the other one trying to join in, but he couldn’t handle anything else.

“No more. Pl-please, no more..”

The hand on his face, gentle and warm, lifted his head. “Naruto, what is my name?”

Naruto stared at him, trying to focus on him and only him. “K-Kakashi.”

“That’s right” he said softly. “And who am I?”

“The.. d-doctor..”

“Good. Now I need you to breathe, ok? That’s right, nice and slow. Just look at me. What do you see?”

“Dark eyes” Naruto forced out, trying not to throw up as his panic clawed into him. “Your hair.. it’s.. it’s grey, but you look young. So maybe s-silver?”

Kakashi released his face but stayed close and kept his eyes locked onto him- his stare just as unyielding as Naruto’s.

“Good” he said softly, “what else?”

“Your shirt is.. it’s bl-black. There’s a wrinkle on your collar.”

Kakashi couldn’t help but smile at that.

“I appreciate you telling me. What else do you see?”

“I- I- I don’t.. I don’t..”

“It’s ok, deep breaths. That’s it. Breathe in” Kakashi inhaled deeply, “and breathe out” he released a long exhale.

Naruto timed his own breathing to match Kakashi’s, focusing on his eyes as he forced air back into his lungs, distracting his mind from everything else. He noticed three freckles under one set of lashes. The other side didn’t have a matching set.

He briefly wondered if it bothered Kakashi that his eyes didn’t match.  

“You’re doing great, Naruto.”

Kakashi patiently waited for the blonde’s breathing to stabilize. He stayed down on the floor before him, unbothered by the curious stares directed their way, the hard tile against his legs. He watched the blonde, gently encouraging him as he slowly pulled himself back from his panic.

When Naruto slowly closed his eyes, grounding himself further, Kakashi shifted his gaze lower. His eyes narrowed on the deep purple bruises around his wrists before lifting back up again. He made sure to keep his expression light and friendly when Naruto opened his eyes again, and the blonde didn’t appear to suspect anything else.

“How about you come with me, hm? We’ll have some tea in my office.”

Naruto nodded numbly, only half hearing him, but Kakashi didn’t wait for more. He clambered to his feet and gently took hold of his patient, steadying him as he found his own. A few orderlies rushed forward, prepared to help, but Kakashi held out his hand and shook his head. They retreated, stepping back as their boss moved past them with his patient in tow, careful not to get in their way.

Naruto didn’t want to see anything, anyone, so he kept his eyes on his feet as they moved forward, as Kakashi pulled him down the hall and over to his office. He had been there numerous times over the past year- he knew it well. He didn’t have to look up to know that that’s where he was bringing him, and he didn’t bother looking up as Kakashi guided him over to the chair across from his desk.

Naruto took a seat without prompting and Kakashi stepped across the room to start his electric tea kettle.

“Earl Grey or Constant Comment?”

After a long pause Naruto finally muttered, “isn’t that the same thing?”

He peered up and found a thoroughly offended Kakashi looking back at him. Which did seem to cheer him up a bit.

“Not all black teas are alike, Naruto.”

“If you say so..”

“They say so” Kakashi insisted. “I’m just their dedicated spokesperson.”

Naruto rolled his eyes at the doc’s attempt to jest and decided to save the man from future dad jokes and, in turn, embarrassment. “Fine. Earl Grey.”

“Great choice.”

“I’m sure you say that about the other one too.”

Kakashi shrugged. “I guess you’ll just have to find out next time.”

“Next time..”

Because there would be plenty more.

Naruto wasn’t going anywhere any time soon- not after his latest episodes.

It wasn’t like he had anything against the man. Naruto liked Doctor Kakashi. He was gentle, he listened almost as well as Naruto’s kindest illusions, and he never looked at him with judgment or ridicule. His eyes, as dark and impenetrable as they were, were sincere. They didn’t reel him in the way that Sasuke’s did, didn’t make him wonder about their depths or crave the chance to explore them, but he couldn’t deny that he was curious about him.

Kakashi never shared anything personal, but that didn’t stop Naruto from noticing what was already there. There was something sad about the man. And while he didn’t know what it was, every time Naruto looked at Kakashi he felt his chest swell with empathy for him.

He wanted to hate Kakashi- for studying him like a lab rat, for helping his foster parents keep him in here, but he couldn’t find it in himself to blame him for that. Kakashi was just doing his job, and he clearly cared about his patients. It wasn’t his fault that Naruto wound up here. He knew he wasn’t trying to imprison him- he was trying to treat him.

Naruto understood that, but he couldn’t help but harbor a little resentment towards him anyways.

“What happened to your wrists, Naruto?”

The blonde flinched, violently. The question threw him off and he jolted against the suddenness of it. And as it seeped into his mind, as he fully processed what he was really asking, Naruto realized that he didn’t know how to answer it. He wasn’t sure what he should say, what he was allowed to say.

What Kakashi would believe.

Words were always hard to find and place in the right order, but it was so much worse when he wasn’t sure if he should speak at all. In the end he chose to say as little as possible and see how Kakashi responded to it.

“Restraints” he said quietly, his head bowed as he waited for him to reply.

“Yes, I can see that.”

Naruto peered up at him warily, not sure what to make of that. Kakashi didn’t push for more, but he didn’t seem satisfied with his answer either. Naruto chewed at his bottom lip as he watched Kakashi prepare their tea, his eyes occasionally flitting back to find him. He slowly poured the hot water over little bags lying in porcelain cups, his movements unhurried.

Fragile things that he handled with such care..

“I was afraid.”

Kakashi nodded. He carefully brought the two cups of tea to his desk, placing them to the side to cool before letting Naruto have access to his own. Once he was able to finally free up his hands, he folded them beneath his chin and locked eyes with his patient.

“What were you afraid of?”

“Who” Naruto said quietly.

Kakashi raised a brow. “Pardon?”

“Not what” Naruto explained, “who.”

The blonde was trying to proceed with caution, to test the doctor’s reactions before giving away too much. If Kakashi seemed defensive, angry, quick to excuse away someone hurting him, then Naruto would keep the truth sealed away with everything else that tormented him. And on the off chance that he would keep an open mind, that he would want to know who hurt his patient, that he’d want to stop someone like that, he’d tell him.

He’d trust him.

“Another patient?” Kakashi asked.

Naruto bit his lip hard and shook his head.

“I see.”

The blonde kept his head down, afraid of what he’d see if he looked up. Kakashi kept quiet for a moment, a long terrifying moment, before he finally spoke once more.

“Naruto, is there someone here who has hurt you?”

He nodded.

“Does that someone work here?”

Another nod, though he hesitated before doing it. He still wasn’t so sure that this was a good idea.

“Hurt you how?” Kakashi prodded, hoping to get more than a few gestures from him.

Naruto swallowed hard, then slowly looked up. His stare locked onto the eyes across from him, and he couldn’t seem to look away.

“He.. he touched me” he forced himself to say. “He said he.. that he…”

“Touched you where?” Kakashi asked, his voice gentle but firm. He wouldn’t make assumptions- Naruto would have to tell him everything if he was going to move forward with this.

“Under my.. clothes.” Naruto’s eyes filled with shame, but he knew he had to keep going if he was ever going to make it stop. “H-he grabbed my..”

A tear slid down his face, surprising the silver-haired man across from him.

Naruto had always struggled to show the emotions trapped inside of him. Tears have been practically nonexistent, and they most certainly never fell.

Kakashi felt the weight of his pain, his fear, crashing down on him, and the feeling surprised him further. His patients were important to him, of course they were, but he couldn’t do his job well if he was affected by them like this. And yet..

“He s-said, ‘you’ll be mine soon enough’.” Panic filled those cerulean eyes once more, another attack sitting on a precipice, ready to fall. “He’s going to.. to…”

“No, Naruto. He isn’t.”

The blonde stared at him, waiting with bated breath to see what he meant by that.

“I will personally make sure that that man never touches you again.”

Naruto was shocked to hear that same anger he had heard in Sasuke’s voice when he first released him from his restraints, when he saw the bruises.

He wants to protect me.

“Why..?” he wondered aloud.

“I’m sorry that you feel like you have to even ask that, Naruto. If someone hurts you, violates you, people should help you. They should want to make it stop.”

Kakashi gave him a pained look.

“It saddens me to know that it hasn’t been like that for you.”

Naruto slipped his fingers down his face, across the scars.

“Thank you, Kakashi.”

“Save the thanks, I haven’t done anything yet.”

Kakashi grabbed a pen and clicked down on it as he slid his notepad over. He raised his head to look at his distraught patient, dark eyes filled with determination and the remnants of an anger he wasn’t quite ready to let pass.

“But that’s about to change.”

Chapter Text

“I’m tryna be headstrong but it feels like I slept on my neck wrong.”

- Eminem

--

Kakashi called in a few orderlies to escort Naruto back to the community room, ensuring that he got there safely. He watched them leave, staring after the sad blonde for a moment as he thought over his next steps. Then he stepped back around his desk, fell into his chair, and pulled out his staff records.

It had taken quite a bit of prodding on his part, and two strong cups of tea, but Kakashi finally managed to get Naruto to tell him about the man who attacked him. His description sounded faintly familiar, but Kakashi couldn’t recall his face. He assumed that wouldn’t be much of a problem once he started looking though.

The orange hair would be a dead giveaway.

After going through a dozen papers, Kakashi finally spotted the autumn hair and cold eyes of the man Naruto had described. Kakashi narrowed his eyes on his face, engraving it to memory. His gaze lowered as he read his information. “Deva Pain..”

Seems fitting, he thought bitterly. He does seem to cause a lot of it.

Kakashi slid his chair along the length of his desk to the schedule he kept posted on the wall and slid his fingers down the list of staff working each day. Looks like he doesn’t come in again for a couple days.

Kakashi wasn’t about to let that happen.

He grabbed his work phone, shifted back to the center of his desk, and typed in the number he had on file. As it rang, Kakashi decided he’d just make up an excuse to have him come in early. Then he would confront him at the front entrance, away from his patients, and have security remove Deva from his sight when he was done with him.

Kakashi wanted to see the guilt in his eyes before he threw his fist between them.

It wasn’t exactly the most professional way to handle this situation, but Kakashi was known to, let’s say, bend the rules from time to time. Always for the greater good, of course. He didn’t necessarily condone or excuse it away, but that didn’t change the fact that sometimes a bit of extra assertiveness was necessary.  

After what Naruto told him, Kakashi decided that this was one of the times when it was pretty fucking necessary.

After several unanswered rings, the call was directed to voicemail. Kakashi willed his voice to sound friendly as he quickly let Deva know who he was and what he wanted. He made up some bullshit about there being staff changes, and that he would like to arrange a time for him to come in and discuss his new schedule. He figured that was a believable enough excuse. Then he hung up and leaned back in his chair with an exasperated sigh.

“How the hell did a guy like that get in here in the first place..”

Truth be told, he didn’t remember hiring him. The name didn’t even ring a bell, and it should have. Even if Deva hadn’t dyed his hair until after he was hired, with a last name like that he would have stood out.

“Meaning I wasn’t the one who hired him.”

The realization hit a nerve.

In fact, it hit several.

“That dumb cow.”

Kakashi’s fist clenched tight around the bastard’s smug face, wishing it was his neck in place of his bullshit file.

I never would have hired this asshole.

“I should have fired Tsunade a hell of a lot sooner.”

--

Naruto groaned as he blinked heavy sleep from his eyes, slowly getting his bearings to come back. The dark was insistent, but he wasn’t letting up either. He didn’t know what it was that woke him, but he had a crawling suspicion that he needed to.

Naruto looked up at the alabaster ceiling overhead. The small night-light they permitted him illuminated its nothingness. He narrowed his cloudy eyes at it. Naruto never trusted a blank canvas, but his illusions loved nothing more.

The meds appeared to be working, because there was no sign of them. The shadows didn’t start crawling towards him, there were no mysterious eyes he couldn’t help but stare back at, no beings shoving their way through the drywall. Ok, he had no reason to fear anything above him. But that might not be the same for everywhere else.

Naruto lazily dropped his head to the side, still weighed down with exhaustion and chemicals. He blinked, puzzled by what he saw at first, wondering if he really was hallucinating. Then reality hit him- like a fucking grenade.

Naruto’s heart lunged up his throat and he bolted upright in bed, his eyes wide with panic. He shot back, hitting the wall in his haste.

“Wh-what are you doing here?!”

A hand pressed against his mouth, relatively gentle but firm enough to keep him silent.

“Shh, they’ll hear you.”

Part of Naruto wanted them to, but his curiosity got the better of him- as usual.

Naruto pulled the hand away and willed his heart to settle back in his chest as he met those deep dark eyes.

“Why are you here, Sasuke?”

The raven dropped his head, his remorse genuine. “I’m sorry. I know, I’ve said that to you a lot lately, but I do mean it. I just.. I lost it when I thought about someone touching you and-”

“That doesn’t make it ok.”

Sasuke grimaced. “I know that.”

“And you went too far before that.”

Sasuke sighed and looked up, prepared to face the truth that Naruto would inevitably tell. “I know that too.”

“I might not know much about friends” Naruto went on, “but I know they don’t do that.”

“Maybe I don’t want to be just your friend.”

Naruto swallowed hard.

”Sasuke, I.. I’m still trying to wrap my mind around the fact that you’re real. And that you still want to be around me. This place.. I’m going to be here for a while, and I-”

He could feel himself rambling, but he didn’t know how to stop. How to make his feelings and thoughts concise instead of a mixing bowl of nonsense and panic. He wasn’t used to saying a whole lot of anything to anyone- not anyone real at least.

And he definitely wasn’t used to having someone want to…

Naruto shook his head. “The only thing I need in here is a friend, Sasuke.”

Sasuke looked annoyed, but he tried his best not to be. He didn’t want to take his anger out on Naruto again, but he didn’t want to have to just drop it and move on either.

“You won’t even give me a chance?” he said between clenched teeth.

“I’m not sure I even want to talk to you” Naruto shot back, surprised by the feelings bursting out of him. “You attacked me, Sasuke!”

“And I already told you that I’m fucking sorry for it!”

“But how do I know it won’t happen again?”

“I’m not trying to hurt you” Sasuke said, his eyes pleading with him to believe him, to hear him, and to ignore the perpetual anger that still swirled alongside it.

Naruto could see the sincerity despite the ever-present rage. He did believe that Sasuke regretted lashing out at him, but he wasn’t sure that was enough. He didn’t know anything about this man aside from the fact that he’s also living in a mental institution and that he is always angry. It didn’t exactly make him want to let his guard down with the guy.

Not to mention the fact that this was now the second time he has inexplicably been able to sneak into his room in the middle of the night.

He would be a fool to trust him.

“You should go, Sasuke.”

Those impenetrable eyes seemed to get even darker. “I don’t want to.”

The intensity in his voice drew goosebumps to Naruto’s arms. The nervous blonde pulled himself further away on the bed, pressing his back firmly against the wall.

“Sasuke, I.. I can’t give you what you want.”

“You don’t know what that even is” he argued.

“I think I do.”

Sasuke’s eyes flashed. “I’ll prove you don’t.”

He dropped back on the bed and without warning grabbed the blonde and yanked him down with him. Naruto yelped in surprise but the rest of his protests stayed trapped in his throat, silenced by his fear. He tried to scoot away, but Sasuke’s arms tightened around him and pulled him close to his side.

“W-wait-”

“This is all I want, Naruto.”

The blonde paused and looked up as Sasuke tilted his head enough to meet his stare.

“I just don’t want to be alone.”

Naruto’s heart seized in his chest. He knew that feeling. He understood what it was like to hate solitude, to be irrationally afraid of it. To be willing to do anything to escape it. There was a reason Naruto had yet to fully shut out the creatures in his head.

He didn’t want to be alone either.

“You.. really just want this?”

Sasuke stared down at him without amusement or jest, without anger. Naruto wasn’t sure he had ever seen him look so serious without a secondary emotion tacked on along with it. He wasn’t sure if that look was reassuring..

or terrifying.

“Sasuke..?”

“Just let me hold you” he said quietly. “I’ll leave before shift change.”

“What if someone checks?”

“No one’s going to check.”

He seemed pretty confident about that. Naruto decided that at some point he’d have to get Sasuke to explain how in the world he was sneaking out of his cell at night, seemingly without a care in the world. But now didn’t need to be that time.

Naruto gave the raven’s face one last searching look before finally resigning himself to a comfort he had never known. He dropped his head and let strong arms circle around him, pulling him into Sasuke’s intoxicating scent and undeniable warmth.

Anyone who claimed that this man was cold was dead fucking wrong. Naruto felt heat inside and out and all of that was because of the rather mysterious, but very real, Sasuke Uchiha. Naruto knew what it was to be touched by someone cold and cruel.. better than most. Sasuke wasn’t one of them.

“Why would you want to do this with me..” Naruto breathed, an inside thought that had somehow found its way out.

“I want to do this because it’s you” Sasuke murmured, suddenly unabashed in his own honesty.

Naruto gave an incredulous laugh. “You don’t even know me.”

“Maybe. But I know enough to know I want to know more than I know.”

“That sounds like nonsense.”

“Not in my head.”

Naruto’s mouth snapped shut. He had never heard a more relatable sentiment.

Sasuke took his silence as approval, and settled in. He buried his face in lush blonde hair and inhaled deeply, his eyes rolling as Naruto’s scent invaded his senses and drilled deep in his mind. He nuzzled his cheek against it and slowly closed his eyes, relishing in the absurd amount of comfort it offered.

“I wish you liked this the way that I do.”

There was a long, excruciating pause before Naruto finally answered. His voice was low, shy. It made Sasuke’s heart skip a beat.

“I never said I didn’t like it.”

Dark eyes shot open. Sasuke slipped his hand up and raised the blonde’s face with it, prepared to do something about their shared feelings. He wanted to kiss him, taste him. Devour him.

Sasuke stopped.

Naruto’s eyes were huge and vibrant and so.. so fucking trusting. Sasuke was used to provoking people- eliciting chaos, rousing fear and outrage- forcing any kind of reaction he could get. He was angry and inconsolable and he needed the whole world to be unable to turn a blind eye to it. But Naruto never had. He didn’t look away when things were ugly and raw- his stare was unwavering. Even when he was afraid, even when Sasuke fucked everything up, he never stopped looking at him.

He didn’t want to do something that would suddenly make that stop.

With more control than he had ever exhibited before, Sasuke leaned down and kissed Naruto lightly on the cheek. He didn’t say anything after, but he made sure to hold Naruto’s gaze- to show him that he wasn’t backing down and he wasn’t embarrassed by how he felt.

Naruto didn’t say anything either. He didn’t berate him, or question him. He didn’t push him away, and he didn’t kiss him back. He didn’t give him any sign of how he felt.

But he didn’t look away either.

--

Kakashi was getting pretty goddamn impatient. So much so that he had even gone to the bastard’s house, and still nothing. He wondered if Deva was suspicious of him and had bailed to avoid getting caught.

Kakashi was fine with the idea of him never showing his face in his facility again, but Deva simply disappearing wasn’t enough. If he really had violated Naruto, which Kakashi was inclined to believe, it was highly likely that he had done so to other patients as well. And who knows how far he had gone. He wanted more than for Deva to just lose his job. He wanted to make sure he paid for the crimes he committed. And he couldn’t very well do that if he couldn’t find the asshole!

He had already tried to involve the police, but they were pretty fucking useless. It was clear from their exchanged glances and lack of questioning that they didn’t believe him. The second that Kakashi said it was one of his patients who reported it they lost interest. They didn’t say as much, but their expressions were plenty transparent. To them, Naruto wasn’t of sound enough mind to know what happened. If there were times when he saw things that weren’t real, that must mean everything wasn’t- right?

The thought sent a wave of fury crashing over him. Naruto’s schizophrenia wasn’t the cause of this. Those bruises, the terror in his voice, the tears that he couldn’t hold back- Naruto was a victim.

And it pissed Kakashi off to no end that they refused to see it.

Fuck ‘em- he wasn’t giving up. Kakashi would be taking matters into his own hands, and the useless police force could pick up the pieces when he was done.

That is if he ever fucking found him!

At this rate he’s going to show up for work before I have the chance to confront him.

Which meant he’d have to intercept him before he could get access to his patients.

To Naruto.

He’s already hurt him, and I failed to see it. To stop it.

Kakashi clenched his jaw hard, forcing a vein to the surface.

It won’t happen again.

--

Naruto had to admit, it was lonely without Sasuke. He didn’t think it would be that bad- just the same usual loneliness he always felt. He’s been here for over a year, after all. This wasn’t his first time spending the day alone in the community room. So why did it feel so much worse now?

Sasuke’s latest outburst had earned him five days in solitary- five days that Naruto had to spend without him. Well.. except for that first night, when Sasuke had snuck into his room.

Naruto still had yet to find out exactly how he did that, but if he had to guess it probably had something to do with flirting his way to freedom with one of the night staff. Sasuke was alluring, to be sure- it wouldn’t take much. Especially if the orderly in question felt like no one would be the wiser for it. If Sasuke’s night escapades were simply about stretching his legs for a bit.

During the day, on the other hand, there were plenty of staff and patients milling about- it would be pretty difficult to get away with something like that now. A thought that Naruto was surprised to find filled him with immense disappointment. Especially since he hasn’t seen him at all since that first night. He didn’t come back any of the following ones, and Naruto was oddly saddened by that.

Maybe he’s lost interest in being around me..

It could just as easily be that the staff was on rotation and the one in charge the last couple nights wasn’t willing to look the other way for him, but Naruto was inclined to assume the worst. He had learned a long time ago not to get his hopes up- about anything. It seemed foolish to do so now.

So, he was even more surprised when he walked into the community room that morning to find Sasuke already waiting for him in his chair- two days sooner than expected. A warm feeling spread through him, and while he couldn’t seem to get his face to respond he could feel the smile in his eyes and hoped that the raven could see it.

Naruto stared as he walked over to him, trying not to seem too eager as he went, and Sasuke easily met it. And held it. Somewhere along the way, Sasuke seemed to have gotten used to Naruto’s habit and even went as far as to return the gesture. Naruto felt the corner of his mouth tilt up slightly, his smile fighting its way to the surface.

He stopped in front of the chair, suddenly feeling nervous. “Hey” he said quietly.

Sasuke smiled. “Hey.” He patted the chair, smile locked in place. “Come sit with me.”

Naruto bit his lip, and Sasuke watched with the utmost focus. Naruto quickly released it, his cheeks reddening.

“There’s.. not a lot of room.”

Sasuke’s grin widened. “I’m ok with that.”

Before the blonde could protest further, Sasuke grabbed hold of his wrist and yanked him down beside him. Naruto yelped in surprise, but somehow the orderlies had missed it. They were still yawning over their coffees, preoccupied by the horde of patients still making their way into the room.

Sasuke quirked his brow at the startled blonde. “This can’t keep surprising you, Naruto.”

“You’re lucky no one saw that.”

Sasuke shrugged. “Felt worth it to me.”

Naruto seemed prepared to continue arguing his point, but Sasuke wasn’t interested in carrying it out any further.

“So, did you miss me?” he asked, mostly kidding though a part of him wanted the candid blonde to tell him. To reassure him.

Naruto couldn’t help but stare, and he couldn’t stop himself from answering truthfully.

“Yes.”

Sasuke’s smile softened. He lowered his gaze and lightly traced the top of Naruto’s hand with his fingertips.

“I missed you too.”

Naruto couldn’t seem to find the words. His tongue froze in his mouth, his thoughts trapped inside. But Sasuke appeared to be unbothered by it.

“You’re not mad at me for sneaking in the other night?”

Naruto quickly looked around to make sure no one else overhead that.

“It’s fine” Sasuke said, already knowing what he wanted to say. “No one heard.”

Naruto relented, but his concern brought another one to the forefront of his mind and he couldn’t shake it. Sasuke noticed the look on his face and had a feeling he knew why it was there. He didn’t want to acknowledge it, didn’t want to deal with it, but he knew he couldn’t ignore it forever. Might as well get it over with.

“Say what you want to say” he said, his voice sharper than he had intended for it to be.

Naruto flinched, and Sasuke immediately hated himself for it.

“I’m sorry.” He sighed. “I’m not trying to be a dick. I can tell there’s something you want to say, so you might as well say it.” When Naruto continued to stay quiet, he added, “I’ll listen.”

The blonde nodded, searched for the words, and pushed down the anxiety that kept them scattered. “I, umm, I don’t know how to..”

“Don’t worry about how it sounds” Sasuke cut in. “Just say what’s on your mind.”

Naruto knew that Sasuke’s anger was quick and unpredictable, so it worried him to do that. But it looked like that was exactly what he was going to have to do.

“I was scared” he said, unable to be anything but honest.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes. “Of?”

Naruto swallowed but couldn’t look away. And he couldn’t help but answer.

“You.”

He could see his jaw click, and knew he was already tredding on thin ice.

“Why?” Sasuke said between his teeth, unable to hold back his anger enough to get out anything else.

“You were so mad” Naruto whispered. “I.. didn’t know what you were going to do to me.”

Naruto could feel the heat from the inferno in Sasuke’s eyes burning straight through him.

“Were you afraid the other night?”

Naruto paused, thinking back. “Only at first” he admitted.

That seemed to cool Sasuke’s temper a bit. Just enough to keep his composure mostly in place.

“So we’re talking about what happened in here.”

Naruto nodded, but Sasuke could see there was something else he wanted to say. The real reason he was bringing this up now. The reason he had been so scared during his last outburst.

Sasuke wanted to ask gently, but he was having a hard time keeping his anger in check. “Was there something else?” he snapped.

“You.. said I was yours.”

“Because you are.”

Naruto gave him a pained look. “Sasuke-”

“I’m not taking it back” the raven growled. “Don’t ask me to.”

“I just want to be your friend” Naruto said weakly.

“Friend” Sasuke repeated, something akin to disgust in his voice. “You think friends lay in bed together?”

“It wasn’t like that!”

“I held you!” Sasuke snapped, his voice rising fast. “And you fucking let me!”

“Sasuke, please.”

Naruto reached towards him to take hold of his arm, to try to ground him, but his hand froze. He wasn’t sure that he should touch him- not when he was accusing those touches of being less than innocent.

“If you do this, they’re going to drag you away again.”

“What the hell does that matter?!” Sasuke shot back. 

Naruto gave him a sad look, one that made his anger falter. “I don’t want to be alone again.”

The raven dropped back, his rage successfully doused by his blonde’s truth.

“Ok” he breathed. “Ok. Fine, I’m sorry.”

He was tired of saying sorry.

“You still haven’t told me what that asshole did to you.”

Naruto looked sickened by the thought. “I don’t want to make you mad again.”

“I thought we covered this” Sasuke said, “I’m always mad.”

Naruto gnawed at his bottom lip, still not convinced that he should keep testing Sasuke’s self-control like this. “He.. touched me” Naruto forced himself to say.

After multiple attempts, he finally managed to drop his gaze. He stared at his hands as his fingers tangled together on his lap. The silence between them made him incredibly nervous, but he didn’t want to look up yet.

“Down.. there” he added. “He said that I’ll be” his face contorted, “his soon.”

“When you were tied down to your bed” Sasuke grated out, hating the images that flashed in his head at the thought.

“Yes.”

So that’s why he doesn’t like when I say he’s mine. That fucker did the same thing.

Sasuke ground his teeth together.

But Naruto really IS mine. And that bastard won’t take him from me.

NO ONE will.

Not even Naruto.

“I’m not him.”

Naruto’s head shot up at that, eyes wide as they locked onto him. “I know that.”

“Do you?!”

“Sasuke-”

“I’m trying, alright! But I am fucking mad. What else would I be?! You’re acting like I did the same thing!”

“No, I know you didn’t. I’m just telling you that I was scared-.”

“That I would” Sasuke finished for him.

“I don’t know what you’ll do. That’s why I’m scared!”

“You don’t know what your hallucinations will do” Sasuke argued. “Are you afraid of them?”

“Yes.”

That quieted him.

“You.. said you preferred them.”

Naruto shook his head slightly. “I just.. never had anyone else.”

“Well, you do now. So stop pushing me away.”

“I just-”

Naruto’s words snagged in his throat.

It had been just a glimpse, something he noticed out of the corner of his eye for maybe a second, but it had been enough. Naruto recognized that color- a shade of orange that was practically burned into his brain. It wasn’t something he could easily forget.

He hoped he was wrong, that he was just being paranoid. That it was merely a hallucination brought on by stress. He wanted so badly to write it off as something that was just in his head, something he could erase with the right combination of meds, but he already knew it wasn’t.

It had been real then, and it was real now.

Naruto forced himself to look over and all of the blood instantly drained from his face.

It’s him.

Those eyes found him and locked on, excitement and cruelty flickering inside.

Naruto’s whole body trembled under that look, which only made it worse. His stomach twisted and tangled, a sensation that moved up and constricted his throat- leaving him breathless. He wanted to run, but he couldn’t move, couldn’t think. Terror seized his limbs, his voice, his mind, and refused to let him go.

Sasuke noticed his sudden fear and followed Naruto’s gaze to the orderly that had just walked into the room. His eyes shot back to Naruto before finding the guy staring at him again.

“Is that him?”

Sasuke tensed, ready to spring out of his chair the second Naruto confirmed his suspicions. The trembling got worse, which was answer enough, but he still wanted to hear him say it. He was on the verge of repeating the question, when Naruto finally said one word that got Sasuke out of that chair faster than he thought possible. One word that echoed in his head over and over, driving every step forward.

“Y-yes.”

Sasuke walked with purpose, but he didn’t sprint at the bastard the way he wanted to. He didn’t want to draw attention to himself, on what he intended on doing. Sasuke was going to make damn sure that there wouldn’t be a single person there to stop him.

His dark stare never left the man’s face, but he wasn’t looking back at him-

he was still looking at Naruto.

Sasuke marched past the breakfast line, snagging a fork along the way, never dropping his eyes. He wished that the thing was metal instead of cheap plastic, but he’d make it work. 

Sasuke tighened his fist around the fork so hard that it snapped in half. He let the useless end fall to the floor and adjusted his hold, sliding his fingers down to the prongs, leaving the jagged part exposed. A malignant smile twisted his features, a promise of pain in his eyes.

When he got close enough the man finally turned to face Sasuke, his brows furrowed in confusion. “Something I can do for you?” he asked, having yet to notice the murder in his eyes and the opportunity in his hand.

“Yeah. There is.”

Sasuke’s smile widened, a malevolent sneer that stretched his skin taut and never failed to instill fear.

“You can fucking die!!”

Sasuke suddenly launched himself at the orderly, knocking him to the ground. Deva’s head smacked into the hard tile floor with a sickening crack. His eyes closed against the pain as darkness crept in, threatening to pull him inside. But being under a violent patient wasn’t the time to lose consciousness.

Deva opened his eyes fast, and they shot up- giving Sasuke two perfect targets.

Sasuke spun the fork in his lithe fingers, eyes gleaming with intent as his fist closed around his makeshift weapon.

Deva saw his arm raise, saw the broken plastic in his hand, and those perfect targets widened.

“Stop!”

And just like when Naruto had pleaded for the exact same thing from this bastard,

he didn’t.

Chapter Text

“There is always some madness in love, but there is also always some reason in madness.”

- Friedrich Nietzsche

--

Deva just managed to turn away, saving his sight, but it wasn’t enough to leave him unscathed. The sharp plastic in Sasuke’s determined hand viciously tore through the meat of his face. Blood rose to the surface and slid down his cheek, and the pain was quick to follow. Deva opened his mouth to scream but Sasuke’s savage ones completely drowned him out.

The raven howled with rage as he drove the jagged end of the fork down over and over, carving thick gashes into Deva’s face and splattering his own with fresh blood. Deva tried to grab his arms to stop him, but Sasuke wrenched them free and stabbed the hands attempting to fend him off.

Deva’s pained gasps filled Sasuke’s ears, and excitement bloomed somewhere inside his wrath. The other patients seemed to pick up on it too because their manic shrieks soon joined his own, creating a macabre cacophony that filled the psych ward.

His very own anthem.

The orderlies sprinted over to them, their frantic calls only adding to the chaos. They managed to pull Sasuke off of their colleague, but not fast enough to stop him from exacting at least some of the revenge he was after. The bastard still had his eyes, which Sasuke was not happy about, but he was pleased to see that his face was now a mangled mess. It was marked- letting everyone know that he was nothing but a monster in human skin.

Sasuke still fought like hell when they forced him back, when they pried the makeshift knife out of his clenched fist. He wanted to kill the bastard responsible for Naruto trembling every time he touched him. The one who took advantage of his blonde when he was tied down and helpless.

This just wasn’t enough for him.

“Get off of me, you fuckers! Let go!! I’m not done with him!”

Said fuckers chose not to engage, knowing it would likely only aggravate their patient more. Instead they remained silent as they took control of the situation, trying their best not to let their own emotions get the best of them.

It wasn’t an easy feat.

Seeing one of their own brutalized like that.. they were just as tempted to seek out their own revenge. But as a collective they forced down the impulse and did what they could to manage the situation.

“He deserves to die!! Goddamnit, get off of me! Get off!”

Several hands locked onto Sasuke and he was abruptly shoved to his knees, the impact jarring. He just had enough time to shout his dismay when they yanked his arms behind his back and slammed him face first onto the floor.

Ok, so maybe that impulse wasn’t completely in check.

“Dammit..”

Sasuke hated being controlled like this- feeling helpless. Useless. Naruto’s assailant shouldn’t be left with just a few superficial wounds. He wanted to ruin him- permanently. And he couldn’t stand the fact that these men were keeping him from it.

It’s not like it’s for my benefit, he thought angrily. I’m not just attacking him for no reason. I’m protecting Naruto!

Shit. Naruto..

Where is he?

Sasuke turned his head and found his blonde standing just behind the horde of orderlies all around him. Those cerulean eyes were huge, flickering back and forth between Sasuke’s wild stare and Deva’s mess of a face.

“Naruto-”

Someone pressed hard against his skull, pinning him firmly to the ground. Sasuke groaned under the immense pressure, alarming the blonde he had called out to.

“No! Don’t- don’t hurt him!”

Sasuke peeled his eyes open and found Naruto again. He had taken several steps towards him, those blues brimming with panic.

“It’s ok, Naruto” Sasuke said between clenched teeth, trying not to let pain and anger get the best of him. “I’m fine.”

Naruto shook his head. “Please don’t” he choked. “Sasuke was just protecting me!”

Sasuke was momentarily distracted, his focus pulled away from his worried blonde. He could hear quick footsteps approaching behind him, strong and purposeful, and wondered what he was about to face next. He couldn’t turn his head to look. Naruto, however, did and he seemed to be relieved by what he saw.

“Doctor Kakashi, please help Sasuke. He didn’t do anything wrong!”

The silver-haired physician glanced over at the concerned blonde before switching his gaze to the chaos at his feet. Several men were attending to Deva, several others manhandling Sasuke, and a handful on standby waiting for the chance to tag in if needed.

Kakashi sighed. What a fucking mess.

“Go easy on Uchiha” he instructed. “While his actions were.. excessive, he is not completely in the wrong.”

The orderlies stared at their boss, their shock palpable. “You’re kidding, right? Did you see Deva’s face?!”

“Are you questioning my judgment?” Kakashi said, his voice low- a warning his staff would do well to heed.

“N-no sir.”

“Good. Call an ambulance for Mr. Pain and escort him out of the building. He is not to be permitted into this facility again.”

The room fell silent. Even the patients were stilled by it. Their hysteria seemed to pause, their eyes fixed onto their doctor as they listened carefully to his every word. No one had ever seen Kakashi turn on one of his staff like this. Especially one who had been so brutally attacked by a patient.

Kakashi took a knee beside Deva, apathy clear on his face. “And you. I know what you’ve done to my patients, and I won’t tolerate it.”

The doctor leaned closer, his eyes razor sharp as he forced Pain to meet his gaze. “And know this- I would have bloodied your smug face if Sasuke hadn’t beat me to it.”

His focus was on Deva, his words meant for him and him alone, but it didn’t stop the entire room from hearing it. While the rest of the staff didn’t understand what Kakashi was referring to, they quickly realized that they had sympathized with the wrong person. Looks of concern turned to ones of disdain almost instantly.

No one was objecting Deva’s banishment now.

Several orderlies stepped up to remove the man from the building and the others went back to wrangling the Uchiha or calming their over-stimulated patients. A syringe was once again prepared for the raven, and his hair was pushed back to reveal the vein in his neck.

Sasuke was pissed that he was being sedated yet again, but he wasn’t surprised by it. He knew what the consequence would be, but it didn’t matter. He would happily face any punishment if it meant keeping his blonde safe from the bastard who assaulted him.

“Sasuke..”

Sasuke slid his eyes up to Naruto’s as an orderly pushed the needle into his neck. He winced, but didn’t break eye contact. He simply stared and waited, sinking into the depths of those ocean blues as Naruto searched for the words that always seemed to be difficult for him to find. Sasuke didn’t mind waiting, but the meds pumping into his bloodstream didn’t exactly feel the same way. His consciousness was slipping fast, and he was worried that he would fade into that abyss before Naruto said what he clearly wanted to say.

Hurry, he thought. I don’t have.. much longer…

Naruto gave him a small, strained smile- one that Sasuke felt to his core. He wanted to return the gesture, but he couldn’t get his face to work. So instead he watched closely as those full lips parted, and forced back the impending dark as Naruto spoke.

“Thank you.”

Sasuke’s chest ached with the weight of those two words, and the pain in Naruto’s eyes as he said them. He wanted to respond- to tell Naruto that he didn’t need to thank him for protecting him. That he would have done anything to take away the fear he saw. That he wouldn’t let anyone else ever hurt him again. Unfortunately, while Naruto had been able to find his voice Sasuke had no such luck. It seemed to have been swallowed up by the darkness creeping through him, and it didn’t take long for everything else to follow.

Before Sasuke could utter a single word, he was out.

--

Word spread that Sasuke was the asylum vigilante, and the patients practically worshipped him for it. To the point where no one was angered or confused when they saw him free from isolation only a day later. In fact, the general consensus seemed to be that it should have happened sooner.

Rumors had spread about what Deva had done, whispers that alarmed patients and staff alike. Which was great for Sasuke. Because not only had they released him early, but his supervision was now far more lenient than it had been before.

Sasuke was happy about it, but Naruto was a bit concerned. He had already made it clear that he was drawn to Sasuke, that he didn’t exactly hate being close to him, but he was still new to things like.. like what Sasuke wanted. And he had yet to figure out how he even felt about him.

Less supervision meant a handsier Sasuke, which meant time for pondering over all of this was up. Naruto needed to figure out if he was going to push the raven away, maintaining boundaries of friendship and only friendship, or if he was going to let things move past that. If he was actually going to let himself get swept away by this real, and yet seemingly unreal, person in his life.

Naruto knew he was attracted to men- that wasn’t the problem. After all, his first love had been another boy. A boy who broke his heart and practically tore it out of his chest. Though.. that’s to be expected when you realize the first person you have ever dared to love, and who had inexplicably loved you back, wasn’t real.

It’s not the same, he told himself.

Sasuke isn’t Sai. You know he’s real. And he obviously likes you. Or at least is attracted to you.

Would it really be so bad to just.. try?

“Hey, Naruto?”

The blonde blinked. His thoughts faded like wisps of smoke as he turned to meet Sasuke’s gaze. He briefly wondered how many times he had tried to get his attention. How long he had been so deep in thought that he had sat in absolute silence. He wondered, but he was far too embarrassed to ask. So, he settled with the simplest reply.

“Hm?”

“Will you come with me?”

Naruto tilted his head, puzzled. “What do you mean?”

“Breakfast” Sasuke explained. “I skipped it earlier and I.. don’t want to eat alone.”

There was something about his voice that seemed odd, but Naruto couldn’t quite place it. In the end he decided he was just being paranoid and chose to ignore whatever misgivings he had started to have.

He nodded his head and rose to his feet. “Sure.”

Sasuke’s dark eyes gleamed with delight, but Naruto once again chose not to think anything of it. He let the Uchiha take hold of his hand and guide him across the community room, their pace casual and unhurried.

Patients weren’t usually permitted to touch someone like this, but Sasuke had won over the staff’s favor and managed to earn a few perks along the way. So no one blinked an eye at them as they walked, hand in hand, across the room. They moved towards the small line for food, had in fact almost joined it, when Sasuke suddenly changed course.

Naruto glanced over, confused. “Um, Sasuke? Where are we going?”

The raven didn’t reply, leaving Naruto even more confused. He was about to ask him again when Sasuke suddenly yanked him off to the side, tucking both of them into the corridor entrance.

How did we even get here without being spotted? Naruto wondered.

Shouldn’t at least someone have seen us sneak off?

Naruto’s questions fell to the wayside as Sasuke abruptly pulled him across the hall and shoved him into a bathroom. Naruto yelped as he stumbled over his feet, and Sasuke moved fast to silence him. He clapped a hand over the blonde’s mouth and shoved him back against the wall as he pushed the door closed beside them.

Huge blue eyes darted up, and desperate hands were quick to follow. Naruto yanked at his wrist, trying to pull his hand away, but Sasuke doubled down, keeping it in place.

“Mnnph!”

“Shhh.. don’t worry, Naruto. I’m not going to hurt you.”

That didn’t seem to lessen his panic in the slightest.

Sasuke sighed and stepped close, trapping Naruto’s body against the wall with his own. His hand finally fell from his lips, but he was prepared to put it back if he had to. He watched his blonde closely and spoke before he had the chance.

“I want to try something.”

Somehow those huge blues widened even further. “S-Sasuke, we can’t..” he breathed, not knowing how the sound of it reverberated through Sasuke’s entire being.

How it only made him want him more.

“Just one thing. I won’t go too far, I promise.”

“Sasuke-”

But the raven wasn’t interested in Naruto’s protests or insecurities. And he wasn’t willing to hear him out. Impatient and pulsing with desire, Sasuke buried his hand in Naruto’s hair, jerked him forward,

and kissed him.

And everything else, real and imagined, disappeared.

Chapter Text

“How can you have any pudding if you don’t eat your meat?”

- Pink Floyd

--

Naruto had never been kissed before, so he wasn’t completely confident in what he was doing, but he’d have to be crazy not to kiss Sasuke back. Those soft lips moving against him, the sure grip tucked in his hair and around his waist..

Sasuke’s kiss didn’t just sweep him off his feet. It threw him into a completely different reality.

The feeling was so new and enticing.. if he didn’t know any better, he would have thought he’d imagined it. It couldn’t be real- things that were this good never were. And yet, when he nervously slipped his own fingers into Sasuke’s long hair, when he pushed closer and felt the heat radiating off of him, he knew just how real it was.

“Mmnhnn..”

Naruto moaned against his lips and parted his own, welcoming Sasuke inside. He still wasn’t sure that he was doing it right, but it felt good to be invaded by him. Consumed by him. Everything was slick and hot, and he instantly forgot himself and his troubles as he sank deeper.

The hands around him tightened as Sasuke rolled his hips, and things just as quickly became a lot more intense. Naruto could feel how hard he was, how badly he wanted him, and he couldn’t help but feel panicked by it. Things were moving fast, and he just wasn’t ready for it to go that far. Not yet at least.

The anxious blonde pushed against Sasuke’s chest and wrenched his face away, forcing some much-needed space between them.

“W-wait” he breathed.

Sasuke’s eyes burned with desire, a hint of anger flickering in their dark depths.

“I don’t want to.”

Before Naruto could protest further, Sasuke’s lips captured his own once more. They were forceful, determined, and left him utterly breathless. Sasuke yanked the blonde closer, moving against him with the ferocity of his pent-up desires, and Naruto’s anxiety spiked. He whimpered as he struggled to break free and after another searing second, Sasuke finally relented.

He pulled back and scanned Naruto’s face, his dark gaze heavy with longing as he studied every inch of him. Naruto shivered under that look, but Sasuke refused to let it stray.

“Why push me away when I know you like it” he growled.

Naruto felt his face flush and knew Sasuke could see it. That stare hadn’t faltered. It moved from his eyes down to his reddening cheeks- noting his embarrassment, wondering over it.

The blonde cleared his throat as he searched for the words that always seemed to be just out of reach.

“I’ve.. never done this before” he said, feeling awkward admitting it. And a little ashamed, to be honest. He hated to appear so inexperienced, but it was the truth, and he was never very good at hiding that.

“Never what- made out in an asylum bathroom?” Sasuke jested, eyes flickering with amusement.

Naruto wilted under the look, now even more embarrassed to admit the truth.

“Kissed..”

Sasuke’s eyes widened, his shock apparent. “Wait. You’ve never been kissed before?”

Naruto bit his lip and after a brief pause shook his head.

The mirth in those eyes melted away, leaving soft obsidian pools in their wake, and now it was Naruto’s turn to be surprised. He had never seen Sasuke look at him so gently, and he wondered what it meant. What he would say. How he’d feel about Naruto being so new to all of this- with him being so innocent despite being twenty-two years old. He wondered if his inexperience would be a turn off for him. If Sasuke would be impatient with it.

“Does it bother you that I-”

Naruto cleared his throat.

“I mean, are you.. disappointed?”

Sasuke sighed, a long breathy exhale. He dropped his head and pressed their foreheads together, a small smile pulling at his face. Naruto stared at it as he waited for his answer.

“Naruto” Sasuke whispered, his voice eliciting another shiver, “that’s the last thing I feel.”

The blonde leaned back, wanting to see those eyes he always seemed to lose himself in. “Really..?”

Sasuke’s smiled. “I like being your only.”

Naruto blanched at that, but it wasn’t enough to completely relieve him of his concerns. “But I.. don’t really know what I’m doing” he pointed out. “What if I’m not very good at it?”

Something sly, almost cruel, flashed in Sasuke’s eyes but it disappeared before Naruto could get a good look at it.

“That’s impossible” he said smoothly, confidently.

Naruto chewed at his bottom lip and Sasuke’s desire flared to life all over again.

“Naruto.”

He licked his lips.

“I don’t think you know just how much I’m going to enjoy this.”

--

Sasuke managed to snag another kiss, equally as passionate as the first, but once again Naruto put a stop to it. And Sasuke let him. Because he wanted to make sure he’d be able to do it again.

He wanted Naruto, fuck yeah he wanted him- especially after finding out that no one else has had him. How could he not? Naruto’s warm, beautiful, odd enough to not be afraid of his erratic tendencies, strong despite his undeniable innocence. He’s honest to a fault, far too humble for anyone that attractive, and he doesn’t look away when things get ugly.

Everything about Naruto made him want him.

Sasuke thought he had destroyed all traces of his sentimental side a long time ago, but Naruto was quick to prove him wrong. The little schizophrenic in his psych ward, a guy he barely even knew, had somehow taken root under his skin and burrowed his way into his heart.

Sasuke was so enraptured by him that it hurt. He didn’t want to be away from Naruto for a second. In fact, it was almost unbearable. And even when he was with him it didn’t feel like enough. He wanted to be even closer, to bury himself deep inside of him and never find his way back out, but Sasuke had enough sense and reason left not to make that move.

Thank fucking god.

Because he needed his future uke to know that he wasn’t like that bastard who tried to take advantage of him. Sasuke might be impulsive, spiteful, but he refused to be like that with Naruto.

Things would be different with him.

They had to be.

Sasuke gave his blonde one last heated look before stepping back. He turned to adjust his erection, tucking it into the waistband of his pants, assuming that Naruto was probably doing the same thing behind him. When he turned back he held out his hand, hoping that he hadn’t just ruin everything between them, and was thoroughly relieved when Naruto took it.

I guess that’s a good sign.

He tangled their fingers together then turned to unlock the door and peak out into the corridor. He was surprised to find it empty but wasn’t about to tempt fate any further. He stepped out of the bathroom, pulling his blonde after him as he hurriedly crossed the hall and headed back to the community room. They paused at the corner and waited until there were enough distractions before slipping in to join the others.

Naruto started to head back towards the chair they spent most of their time in, assuming that’s where they were headed, but Sasuke had a different idea. He veered away from it and instead pulled him over to a collection of tables and chairs in the center of the room.

Naruto gave him a curious look. “What are you doing?”

Sasuke glanced over at his companion, then abruptly yanked his arm forward, bringing him close to his side. Naruto squeaked in surprise and Sasuke couldn’t help but smirk.

“I’m craving something sweet” he said quietly, “and since I can’t have what I really want I’ll have to settle for the next best thing.”

Naruto’s cheeks flushed an adorable pink and it took everything in Sasuke not to drag his tongue across it for a taste.

God, how is he so fucking cute..

And how has no one kissed him? How could anyone resist?

Naruto, unaware of the raven’s spiraling thoughts, was surprised by the sudden spark of jealousy he felt. He wasn’t sure what ‘next best thing’ Sasuke was referring to, but the words made him feel small. Insignificant.

He didn’t want to be so easy to replace.

Sasuke must have noticed something on his face, because he gave his hand a reassuring squeeze and quickly answered his question before he could ask.

“Like I said, Naruto, I’m craving something sweet. So tell me-” his grin widened, “what pairs well with neuroleptics?”

Naruto laughed, humor and relief colliding into one, surprising both of them. He quickly coughed back the remnants of the unexpected sound, though Sasuke would have preferred to hear it for a bit longer. It was a side of Naruto he hadn’t seen before. A side he liked.

“Pudding” Naruto answered. “Pills and pudding are the perfect combination.”

“That does sound perfect” Sasuke murmured, “but I can think of a pair that’s even better.”

He stepped in front of the blonde, hand in hand as he met his gaze. He shifted closer and slowly brought his hand up to his face, not wanting to startle him. Azure pools stared up at him as Sasuke lightly dragged his thumb across Naruto’s bottom lip. Those lips parted for him and a flare of unsettled desire stirred in Sasuke’s groin.

Sasuke bit his lip. “And tastes better too..”

Naruto licked his lips, his tongue skimming across Sasuke’s thumb, tempting him even more. His composure was wavering fast. If they weren’t careful Sasuke was going to mount him in front of a room full of people.

“You know, I think I’m starting to crave something sweet too” Naruto murmured.

Sasuke let his hand fall to his side, but the grin stayed locked in place. “Is that right..”

His eyes sparkled with mischief.

“We are still talking about pudding right?”

“Right” Naruto replied. His voice lowered, but he held his gaze as he added, “for now.”

“Jesus Christ, Naruto..”

The blonde tilted his head, those innocent eyes blinking up at him. “Hm?”

“You’re lucky I don’t have you in that bathroom.”

The heat in his face came back with a vengeance, but before he could respond to that someone else did it for him.

“Hey you two!”

Naruto jumped and jerked back as an orderly approached. Sasuke looked pissed by the interruption, but he managed to hold his tongue.

“Hands off- you know the rules.”

Sasuke’s glare was not the least bit effective, but the man’s stern voice was. Naruto quickly pulled his hand away, aggravating the raven even more.

The orderly gave them one more authoritative stare before finally stepping away. They watched him station himself along the perimeter closest to them. His eyes stayed locked on the two, clearly anticipating having to step in again. And while Sasuke was fine testing those boundaries, unfortunately Naruto wasn’t.

Goddamnit.

Sasuke glared at the orderly, followed by all of the others surrounding and controlling their every move. He grated his teeth.

Fucking cock block.

--

Days passed and Naruto, well, he was feeling more anxious by the second. Not because Sasuke was handsy and impatient. On the contrary, it was because Sasuke wasn’t attempting anything.

Nothing.

It’s not like Naruto had suddenly become comfortable with all of this. In fact, the idea of going any further with Sasuke was nothing short of terrifying. He knew he wasn’t ready for any of it- hell, he wasn’t even completely sure he was ready to be kissed again. The sheer force of it made his head spin.

He shouldn’t mislead him. It wasn’t fair to lead Sasuke on only to reject him when he acted on it, when he wanted more. But now Naruto felt like the one rejected. He wasn’t brazen enough to make a move but it did bother him that Sasuke hasn’t. Since that time in the bathroom, he hasn’t so much as touched him. And Naruto couldn’t figure out why.

There had to be some kind of explanation, and maybe it was a simple one, but he couldn’t shake the feeling that it was something he did. He could feel his insecurities getting the best of him, and with each passing moment those feelings grew stronger.

Maybe he doesn’t want me anymore, he thought.

Maybe he realized he could do better.

Maybe he’s not attracted to me now.

… Maybe he never was.

Naruto’s anxiety surged as one particular thought took root- a constant concern in his life.

Maybe I just imagined the whole thing.

Naruto didn’t want to believe that, and he was determined not to. He even started trying to earn back Sasuke’s attention, his affection. He was now spending more time in front of the mirror each morning, futzing with his hair, his clothes- wondering what he could do to look more desirable. In the end it always looked unruly, his clothes permanently bedridden, and his confidence slipped even lower.

Sasuke seemed to notice the change in him, though he didn’t understand it. He gave him a few curious looks, asked him if he was ok, and for once Naruto managed to keep his truth to himself. Sasuke accepted it at first, this dejected silent blonde of his, but it didn’t sit right with him. He couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong, and his patience with it was deteriorating fast.

After several disquieting days, Sasuke had finally had enough. He strode into the community room that morning, his steps fast and sure. He spotted his blonde grabbing a pen from one of the art carts and quickened his pace to join him.

Naruto looked up at the sound of his approach and those cerulean eyes widened as he drew closer. Naruto took a step back, which only pissed the raven off more.

“Sasuke..?”

The raven ground his teeth together.

He couldn’t stand seeing the fear in his eyes.

“So that’s how it’s going to be..”

Sasuke grabbed the blonde by the arm and jerked him close, baring his teeth. “Tell me what’s going on with you.”

Naruto stared at him, his brows furrowed. “I- I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes you do” he growled. “And you’re going to tell me what it is. Right now.”

A gruff voice cut between them, irking the raven further. Sasuke could hear two orderlies stepping up to them and it took everything in him not to lunge at the assholes and bash their faces in for interrupting.

“Hey! I already told you two before. Step away from eachother.”  

Sasuke gave the blonde another dark look before turning his sharp gaze to the men storming their way. “Do you mind?” he snapped. “I’m trying to have a fucking conversation.”

“Use your words instead of your hands, Uchiha.”

Sasuke smirked. “I think we both know that’s not what he wants.”

Naruto flinched, and all humor fled from Sasuke’s face. He quickly turned back to look at the blonde, his hand falling to the wayside as he spoke. “Naruto, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”

The orderly was stunned to see him suddenly so apologetic. This wasn’t a side they were used to seeing from him, and for a while all they could do was stand there and stare. But when Sasuke went to touch the blonde again, they sprang into action. One orderly slipped between the two of them, hands forcing them apart, and another grabbed hold of Sasuke’s arm to pull him back another step.

“Alright, Romeo. Why don’t you give him space, hm?”

“I’m not leaving him.”

“Sasuke-” Naruto tried.

“No! I’m not leaving you!” He tried to wrench his arm free, but the orderly’s grip didn’t budge.

“Relax, alright. Just take a minute to breathe, get some breakfast, you can see him again later.”

“Fuck you!!”

Sasuke jerked back and immediately slammed his fist into the man’s face. The orderly dropped heavily to his knees and Sasuke lunged for the other, fully intending on doing it all over again, but this one was ready for him. He dodged his attack and grabbed his wrist. Before Sasuke could do more, his feet were kicked out from under him and he crashed to the floor.

“Wait! It isn’t what you think. Sasuke wasn’t bothering me.”

Sasuke glanced up and found Naruto’s worried eyes locked onto his face. He shifted his gaze and found the distrustful eyes of the orderly he had knocked down.

“Yeah, well, he’s bothering us.”

“It was just a misunderstanding” Naruto tried. “Please, it won’t happen again.”

The orderlies exchanged a look, and Naruto was almost certain they were going to listen to him. But they seemed to change their mind last second.

“Fine, but he’s not staying in here.”

“But he-”

“Uchiha’s going to talk this out with the doc. And you-”

Eyes shot over to Naruto, narrowing.

“-stay out of trouble while he’s gone.”

Naruto wanted to object further, but it was clear that they weren’t willing to listen. Naruto was just another delusional patient, and so many of the orderlies have become numb to their protests. They had no intention of changing their minds now.

The two worked together to heft the raven back to his feet and drag him out of sight. And Naruto stood perfectly still, staring after their retreating forms, left with guilt and the suffocating silence that came with it. He didn’t know why Sasuke was so mad at him. He wasn’t used to him being like that with him. But his anger this morning, his physical distance the last couple of days, it had to mean something.

He regrets it.

He thinks it’s my fault. That I tricked him into liking me.

And now..

Now he doesn’t want me.

Naruto gripped his chest, wincing at the sudden ache deep inside as those words echoed through him- over and over.

He doesn’t want me.

He doesn’t want me.

… No one does.

Chapter Text

“Somewhere, something incredible is waiting to be known.”

- Sharon Begley

--

Sasuke didn’t come back for the rest of the day, and with each passing moment Naruto’s guilt festered. He was still confused by the raven’s anger, the distance that inexplicably grew between them, but he was also well aware that Sasuke’s aggressive removal was his fault.

Sasuke didn’t do anything wrong- he just wanted Naruto to explain himself. And he just.. couldn’t. It was too terrifying to be that vulnerable, so his words stayed trapped- lost in a sea of insecurities. Naruto was certain that as soon as he put voice to those concerns it was all over, that he would lose Sasuke completely. And he just couldn’t handle losing anything else.

Naruto paced across the community room as these thoughts rustled around in his head and soon his anxiety rose to a full-blown panic attack. He could feel his heart pounding relentlessly against his chest, his body trembling uncontrollably. The room was closing in, and his throat was constricting just as fast. Tears fell down his face, one after the other, but he couldn’t feel them. The pain in his chest, in his skull, took over everything else.

Naruto backed into a wall and slid down it, crouching on the floor as everything collapsed around him. He buried his hands in his hair and clenched tight fists, trying to get a grip on reality with it.

“He doesn’t want me..” he choked. “He doesn’t want me, doesn’t want me, doesn’t-”

Naruto’s voice hitched in his throat, stifling him. A pitiful sound fell from his lips in its place before he could stop it, and the orderlies closed in fast. He tried to shove them back, too overwhelmed to accept their help, but they weren’t taking no for an answer. Before he knew it, he was medicated and dragged off to his room, a handful of reassuring words uselessly tossed out along the way.

The orderlies decided that they didn’t need to restrain him, that it would in fact only worsen his panic attack. Besides, the meds would be kicking in any second now. He’d be out of it soon enough. So they brought him to his room, deposited him inside, and left.

Naruto continued his pacing until the meds kicked in and when they finally did, they hit him like a sledgehammer. He stumbled over to his bed and his knees gave out. He dropped heavily onto the mattress and his eyes flickered like a light switch- on and off, on and off. His thoughts were dazed, fading with each passing second as his consciousness slowly slipped away.

Why..? he thought sadly.

Why is it so hard to.. find someone to..

love..

me.

--

Naruto woke up to the soft clink of metal and instantly knew what it meant.

It wasn’t the first time he’s heard it.

He pushed himself up and sleepily looked across the room, his mind still half lost in a drug-induced fog. He could see a figure encased in shadows slowly closing his door before turning to face him. Dark impenetrable eyes locked onto him, tore through him, and Naruto shifted further away, not sure how to read that look.

Sasuke’s mouth tensed into a terse line as he watched the blonde retreat further from him. It wasn’t the reaction he was hoping for. He soundlessly padded over to the bed and sat down, his eyes still locked on the blonde’s unwavering gaze.

“Why?” he whispered, fighting to keep the anger from his voice as he spoke. “Why are you acting like this? What changed?”

Naruto blinked, now feeling even more confused. “You did.”

Sasuke furrowed his brows, echoing that same confusion. “What are you talking about?”

“You changed.”

“Yes, I heard that part” Sasuke grated out. “I’m asking you what the hell you mean by that.”

“You.. you haven’t..”

Naruto felt heat creeping up his neck. The words were harder to find in his embarrassment, but it was clear from the look on Sasuke’s face that he wasn’t about to let him off easy. He swallowed.

“You haven’t touched me since…”

Sasuke’s eyes widened. “You wanted me to?”

“Yes.”

The raven smiled. “Honest as always, I see.” He shook his head as he dragged his fingers through his hair. “Naruto, you’re the one who told me to stop.”

“That- that was because it was moving so fast. I didn’t mean stop forever.” He bit his lip. “I thought.. you didn’t want me anymore.”

“Didn’t- are you insane?!” He saw that he was about to answer and quickly cut him off. “Don’t answer that. Naruto-”

Sasuke shifted forward, slowly closing the distance between them.

“I want you so bad it fucking hurts.”

“…really?”

Sasuke nodded. “I just don’t want to scare you off.”

“But you weren’t like this before” Naruto pointed out.

He was still having a hard time believing all of this. He hasn’t known Sasuke for very long, but as far as he could see he wasn’t the type to wait things out like this. Sasuke took what he wanted, when he wanted it. He snuck into Naruto’s room because he could. He cozied up with him on his chair without waiting for an invitation. He dragged him off into a bathroom to kiss him because he saw an opportunity and went for it.

Sasuke acted first and thought on it second.

None of what he was saying made any sense.

“Sasuke.. I- I don’t believe you.”

The raven’s eyes burned straight through him, his rage palpable. “You don’t believe me..”

His lips curled into a feral snarl- Naruto’s only warning.

Before he could even begin to process what was happening, Sasuke grabbed him and threw him down on the bed. Naruto gasped as he leaned over him, his hands pressed firmly down on the mattress to either side of his face. His heart seized in his chest as he stared up at the irate raven- a mix between trepidation, fear, and anticipation swirling in his gut.

“Fine” Sasuke growled. “Then I guess I’ll just have to show you.”

“Sasuke-”

The raven roughly grabbed his jaw and held it tight as he lowered his face. Naruto’s eyes widened as Sasuke slammed their lips together, anger and lust pressed firmly between them.

Naruto had wanted Sasuke to kiss him again, he couldn’t deny that, but not like this. Alarmed he pushed against Sasuke’s chest but he wasn’t willing to listen. To stop. Sasuke lowered himself on top of him, forcing himself between Naruto’s trembling legs, and his desperation grew.

“Mnnph!”

He shoved harder until finally Sasuke pulled back and allowed him to catch his breath.

“Sasuke, stop.”

“You said that before, but clearly you didn’t mean it.”

“I did mean it!” Naruto said hurriedly as Sasuke moved to capture his lips once more. “I don’t want it to be like this.”

“Like what?!” Sasuke snapped.

“Please” Naruto choked, “don’t be mad at me.”

Sasuke froze and whatever anger he felt before immediately fled.

“Shit.”

He pushed himself off of the shaky blonde and dropped down beside him. He covered his face with his hands, unable to meet those huge eyes that looked at him with so much innocence- too much trust.

“I’m sorry” he murmured between his fingers. “Fuck, this is why I tried to back off. I’m always like this.. I ruin everything I touch.”

Naruto turned on his side and eyed the dejected raven beside him for a moment before slowly reaching out. He grabbed his wrist and pulled his hand away from his face, and Sasuke let him. He turned and met his gaze, expecting to see blatant rejection but all he saw was that same softness he knew he didn’t deserve.

“You didn’t ruin anything” Naruto said quietly. “Not with me.”

Sasuke shook his head. “Why would you want this?”

“I could ask you the same thing” Naruto muttered.

“You’re kidding, right?”

“I’m not kidding.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. “That was rhetorical. Naruto- do you have any idea how beautiful you are? How sweet and ridiculously forgiving you are?”

Naruto’s eyes widened. “Is that.. rhetorical too?”

Sasuke turned and propped himself up on an elbow to get a better look at the bewildered blonde beside him. He gently smoothed back his hair, his heart clenched into a tight fist as those brilliant blues stared up at him. “I don’t deserve you.”

“No one wants to be with someone who’s schizophrenic, Sasuke. I understand if that’s how you feel too. You don’t have to make excuses.”

A flicker of that familiar anger flashed across his face, but Sasuke forced it back. “Why is it so hard for you to believe that I want to be with you?”

“I told you” Naruto said simply. “I’m-”

“Schizophrenic, yeah, I know. So what? You’ve seen what I’m like- do you want me?”

“Yes.”

Sasuke smiled. “It’s not just for my looks, is it?”

He said it mostly joking, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’t want to hear an actual answer from him. And with Naruto’s constant candidness he knew he’d get one.

Unlike Naruto, Sasuke knew what he looked like. He was well aware that he was attractive, and he often used it to his advantage. He constantly flirted with the night staff to get access to Naruto’s room, and had used similar tactics get away with a lot of things in his life. His alluring face drew in plenty of people, but inevitably his temper drove them away. And for the most part he was fine with that. But he didn’t want it to be the same with Naruto.

He wanted things to be different with him.

So, part of him was actually afraid to hear his answer. But he couldn’t resist asking. He wanted to know the truth.

It was better to know before he let himself fall any deeper.

“No” Naruto replied, pulling him from his spiraling thoughts. “It’s not just your looks.”

Sasuke tilted his head, an impish grin pulling at his face. “And I’m supposed to believe that?”

“Yes.”

God, his honesty is fun.

“So, what else do you like about me?”

“I feel shy saying it” Naruto admitted.

“But you will anyways.”

“Yes.”

Sasuke waited, knowing that Naruto needed the time to find the right words.

“I like your eyes, and that you look at mine when you talk to me” Naruto finally said. His face was flush but his voice kept steady and sure. “I like that you stand your ground” he added, “that you’re not afraid to say how you feel. I like your smile and the sound of your voice. I.. I even like how angry you get for me. When you protect me.”

“Ok, ok, you don’t need to say more” Sasuke murmured, all of his bravado drowning in embarrassment. “You like me. And I like you.”

He leaned in, his voice soft as desire bloomed in his dark eyes. “A lot.”

Naruto licked his lips and Sasuke watched with the utmost focus.

“Can I kiss you?”

“You’re asking for permission?”

Sasuke smirked. “No.”

Then he captured his lips, and this time there was no anger behind the act, no aggression. Only an unmistakable fire, a passion that burned down to his core and quickly ignited Naruto’s own.

Sasuke groaned and pulled the blonde closer, and Naruto echoed the same sound back. His mouth slipped open without prompting and their tongues tangled, fighting for dominance. Sasuke’s hips rolled and this time Naruto didn’t shy away from it. He arched into his touch, pressing his core firmly against Sasuke’s.

Another groan fell from Sasuke’s mouth and into Naruto’s, and he rolled on top of the blonde, finding his way between his legs once more.

Sasuke ground his painfully stiff erection between his legs, their thin pajama pants leaving little to the imagination. Thoroughly ravaging his mouth, keeping his blonde preoccupied, Sasuke reached between them and shoved his pants down his thighs. And, after a moment of hesitation, he did the same to Naruto’s. He left their boxers alone, for now, but he could still feel him stiffen beneath him, his protest on the tip of his entangled tongue. Sasuke lowered himself back down and thrust against him, finding a rhythm that silenced whatever Naruto might have said to stop him.

Naruto was tempted to resist but he couldn’t deny how good it felt. And the faster Sasuke thrust against him, the more he craved. Naruto wrapped his arms around him as he rolled his hips, aching for a release, but Sasuke stopped before he could find it.

“W-wait..” he pleaded. “Don’t.. don’t stop..”

Sasuke had no intention of stopping.

“Do you have any lotion?” he breathed.

Naruto stared up at him with lust and confusion, but answered him nonetheless. “In my drawer.”

Sasuke kicked off his pajama pants and wrenched open the drawer. He pulled out a bottle of scentless lotion and moved fast, hoping to act before Naruto’s desire faded and coherent thoughts found their way back. He yanked Naruto’s pajama pants off, followed by his shirt and, before he could utter a word about it, he did the same with their boxers.

Naruto gasped, fear flickering in those wide blues. “S-Sasuke.. I-”

The raven leaned in, his lips lightly brushing against his blonde’s. “Shhh. It’s ok, Naruto. I won’t go all the way. I just want to try one thing.”

“But I-”

Sasuke squeezed lotion into his hand as he delivered another searing kiss, sealing his concerns between them. He grabbed Naruto’s length as he busied his mouth and felt him flinch against him.

“Mmnnn!”

Sasuke pulled back but kept his mouth close, ready to silence him again if he needed to. “Trust me, Naruto.”

“Ahhh.. S-Sasuke..”

Sasuke’s eyes rolled. “God.. don’t say my name like that” he groaned. “It’s hard enough controlling myself as it is.”

Naruto’s mouth slammed shut.

Sasuke coated Naruto’s cock in the creamy liquid, careful not to rub too much. He didn’t want to make him cum- not yet.

Once he was slick with the stuff he did the same to his own, then pressed their lengths firmly together and wrapped one powerful hand around both of them.

Another sharp gasp tore through Naruto at the sudden contact, and Sasuke quickly silenced him. He licked his way back into his mouth as he slowly moved his hand up and down their straining wants, agonizingly slow at first. Naruto moaned heavily against him, practically begging him for it, and Sasuke’s hand moved faster.

Naruto wrenched his mouth free, gasping for air as Sasuke found a rhythm that made his toes curl and his vision flash white. Naruto thrust desperately into his hand as he clung to him, words spewing from his lips, pleas for more, for his hand to keep going.

“Pl-please.. mnhnn, please Sa.. ‘ske.. ahhh, d-don’t stop..”

“Naruto..” he breathed, “fuck, you feel so good..”

The two thrust against each other as their climax built, their moans getting harder to contain. Naruto threw his head back and Sasuke slammed his hand over mouth to stifle his scream as a shattering climax tore through him. With one last thrust, Sasuke’s own release broke free and shot across Naruto’s stomach.

The two stared at each other, their breaths merging into one. Sasuke studied the blonde’s face as his thoughts cleared, as he realized how far he took things. As he remembered how new all of this was for him.

“Are you ok?” he breathed.

Naruto’s mouth was dry, his voice raspy as he answered. “That felt so…”

“So…?”

“Good.”

Sasuke smiled. He leaned in and kissed one of his whiskered cheeks. “I knew you’d like it.”

He sat up and pulled his shirt over his head, tousling his hair in a way that made the blonde’s heart flutter. Naruto’s heated gaze slipped lower, past those dark eyes he loved losing himself in, down his chiseled face, his muscular torso. When he saw Sasuke’s thick length his eyes shot back up again, much to the raven’s amusement.

“Find something you like?”

“Yes.”

Sasuke laughed lightly as he used his shirt to wipe the now slightly-less-innocent blonde clean. He quickly cleaned himself off after, then dropped back down on the mattress beside him. He pulled Naruto into his arms and was pleasantly surprised when he resigned himself to it. Naruto laid his head down on his chest and Sasuke lowered his face in his hair, breathing in his scent.

“How are you able to do this?” Naruto asked, his voice heavy with exerted lust and thick exhaustion.

“Well, when two boys like each other very much..”

Naruto rolled his tired eyes. “Not that” he murmured, “I mean sneaking into my room at night.”

“You don’t really expect me to reveal all of my secrets already, do you?”

Naruto would have answered honestly, just as he always did, but sleep had already claimed him. And soon after, it did the same for Sasuke.

--

When Naruto woke up the first thing he noticed was that Sasuke had already left.

The second was that it bothered him immensely.

He knew it wasn’t realistic for him to stay considering where they lived, but he wished he could have. He wanted to wake up and find Sasuke smiling down at him, his arms still wrapped securely around his waist. Waking up alone instead felt so.. cold.

Which brought him to his third realization, which was that he was completely naked. And he definitely didn’t want the orderlies coming in while he was like that.

Deva was the only orderly who ever did anything to him, but it didn’t mean he wanted to be that vulnerable around the others. He didn’t trust that they weren’t tempted, especially now that he’d been hurt by one of them.

Naruto quickly pulled his clothes on and dropped back down on the bed, a relieved sigh slipping free when no one showed up. He didn’t have any windows in his room, but he assumed it must be pretty early still. He didn’t hear anyone in the hall yet, no patients being pulled from their slumber, and figured that meant he had more time to fall back into his own.

Naruto closed his eyes, willed his pulse to slow, his mind to go blank, and he sank back into a peaceful dreamless oblivion.

--

“Alright, kid, time to get up.”

Naruto groaned and reluctantly blinked open one bloodshot eye. Asuma, the large burly orderly he had grown accustomed to seeing in the morning, was towering over him, just as impatient as always.

“Mm-mm.”

Naruto flipped over onto his side, ignoring the orderlies request in favor of more sleep. Unfortunately, that’s not how things worked around here.

“Nice try.”

Naruto was easily hefted from his bed and forced to his feet. With his eyes still half shut he was half-guided half-dragged out of his room, down the hall, and into the bathroom. A change of clothes were shoved into his hands along with his small container of toiletries.

“Clean yourself up, get dressed. Time for meds soon.”

The blonde rolled his eyes. “Oh goodie.”

Asuma raised a brow at that. “Well, aren’t you the spirited one this morning.”

Sasuke must be rubbing off on me.

Naruto blushed as he suddenly recalled another way he had been rubbing off on him.

He hurriedly turned away from the curious orderly, not wanting his face to reveal too much, and set off to get ready for the day. Last night came back full force while he was in the shower, scrubbing off the remnants of their passion that was still somewhat caked on his chest. He felt his groin stir but didn’t engage. He didn’t want the orderly to overhear him.. acting on it.

Naruto shoved down the unwanted rush of desire, forcing his mind to focus on something else as he finished washing up. He completed the rest of his morning routine shortly after and spent the rest of the time futzing with his hair, just as he had been doing the last couple of days. But this time it wasn’t because Sasuke suddenly seemed indifferent towards him. No, this time was the complete opposite.

He felt shy. He wasn’t sure how to act around Sasuke after everything that happened last night, and couldn’t help but drag his feet a bit. He was excited to be with him again, eager in fact, but he wasn’t sure what he was supposed to do. The orderlies wouldn’t let them get too close. Was he supposed to hug him? Would he want him to smile at him? Naruto tried a few practice ones in the mirror, but they looked wrong. Disingenuine. Some were even downright scary. Maybe it didn’t look as bad when they were real? He hoped that was the case- because if that was the smile that Sasuke saw from him, he would do his best not to make one at all.

In the end Naruto still hadn’t made up his mind on how he should act around Sasuke before the orderly finally lost his patience with him. Asuma stormed in, grabbed hold of his arm, and pulled him back into the corridor.

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen you spend so much time staring at yourself in the mirror” he muttered. “Getting all dolled up for someone special, are we?”

“Yes.”

Asuma shook his head. “You are something else, kid.”

Asuma didn’t release the blonde until they were well into the community room. He closely supervised as he took his meds, checked to make sure he had actually swallowed them this time, and then went off to collect the next patient on his roster list.

Naruto looked around, scanning the sea of faces for one in particular, but Sasuke wasn’t out yet. Naruto felt a little disappointed, but he knew it wouldn’t be long. He decided to wait for him at their usual spot and headed over to the frayed orange chair in the far corner of the room. He snagged a fresh pen on the way over, prepared to jot a few things in his journal as he waited. As soon as he sat down he fished his hand between the cracks of the chair to take it out.

But it wasn’t there.

Naruto’s heart slammed against his chest as panic surged through him.

“No… no, no, no.. where is it?”

“Looking for this?”

Naruto jerked back, startled by the unexpected voice, and found someone standing over him- someone he had never seen before. Shaggy crimson hair hung low over a deathly pale face. Hollow jade eyes peered between the cracks, and a devilish smile pulled his skin taut. Naruto shrank back from that look- that is until he noticed what the stranger held in his hands.

Naruto leapt to his feet and lunged towards it, but the redhead jerked his hand up, pulling the journal out of reach. He was quite a bit taller than Naruto, his build more masculine- it was clear that Naruto wasn’t getting that journal back unless he wanted him to.

But that didn’t mean that Naruto would just accept that quietly. There were too many personal things in those pages, and it horrified him to see it in someone else’s hands. Who knew how much of it he had already read, how many secrets and tormented memories had already been exposed. The mere thought of that made his stomach twist into sickeningly tight knots.

“Give it back” he snarled.

The redhead smiled down at him, clearly enjoying the sound of his panic, his desperation. This was exactly what he was looking for. Someone to toy with. To dominate. He craved the chance to pull those twisted emotions out of people, to see the hate in their eyes- hate that he forced to the surface.

Hate he could control.

“You seem upset, Blondie.” Gaara smirked and opened a page at random. “You don’t like people knowing your private thoughts, do you.”

“Stop! Just give it back!”

Gaara’s cold eyes found those wide horrified blues before turning his focus back to the pages once more.

“I still remember the feel of his knife against my face” he read. “I didn’t understand why he wanted to hurt me at first. But I understand now..”

A gutteral cry tore from Naruto’s throat and he threw himself at the redhead, knocking him to the ground. Naruto slammed his fist into his face before he had the chance to block him and lurched forward, scrambling to retrieve his journal. Gaara tossed it away from them, sending it sliding across the linoleum, then threw his body to the side and landed on top of the blonde.

Naruto screamed as he pinned his arms to the floor, fear rushing in to replace his rage. Before he could say anything, do anything, a dark blur shot across the room and slammed into the redhead, sending him flying. Sasuke managed to get in one solid punch before an orderly grabbed his arm and wrenched him back.

“Break it up! Break it up!!” Iruka shouted.

He expected Mizuki to be with him still, to have his back, but the orderly was standing off to the side, leaving him to fend for himself. Iruka gave him a confused look before an elbow slammed into his face. He dropped back and hit the ground hard. His skull hit the linoleum with a sickening crack, leaving him stunned. Iruka’s ears were ringing, a deafening shriek that pulsed in his temple, one he couldn’t shake even as he managed to blink back the light blinding him. When his vision finally cleared, he sought out the man who should be helping him and saw something akin to pleasure gleaming in his eyes.

Fucking homophobe, Iruka thought.

He wanted this to happen.

Luckily several other orderlies picked up the slack and the Uchiha was pulled off of the new kid before he could do too much damage. Naruto had kicked an orderly away and scrambled across the floor, but they managed to detain him as well. Iruka could hear him screaming about a journal, but it looked like Sasuke managed to get his hands on it when Naruto failed to.

Iruka knew there were plenty of people on the scene now, but he couldn’t just lay there and do nothing. Especially after such an epic failure. He should have handled this situation better, and it was a rookie mistake to succumb to such a simple attack like this. He was embarrassed by the fact, and eager to redeem himself before anyone else noticed.

Iruka tried to push himself up, but dark splotches consumed his sight and nausea swept through him. His eyes rolled and he crashed back down onto the floor, the jarring impact the only thing keeping him conscious.

“Nnghn..”

Iruka groined in pain as his head collided with the unforgiving linoleum yet again, aggravating whatever damage he had already done. He could feel something hot against his scalp and reached back. He gently prodded the spot, and his fingers came back sticky with blood.

“Dammit..”

He tried to sit up again, but this time it was a hand on his shoulder that stopped him. “Just stay there. Don’t try to move.”

Iruka’s heart skipped a beat.

He knew that voice.

Kakashi.

He blinked back the darkness that had been steadily closing in on him and stared up at the silver fox he worked for- the constant source of his deepest desires. At first he was awestruck, dazzled by his crush’s flawless features, but his infatuation fizzled and shame quickly took its place. He didn’t want Kakashi to think that he was so incompetent, but it was pretty difficult to deny when he was just laying here like this- utterly useless. He was ashamed that he had failed so miserably right in front of him, and that he continued to look so fucking pitiful afterward.

“I’m sorry” Iruka said quietly. His voice sounded strange to him, and he realized he didn’t have as strong a grip on his consciousness as he thought he did.

Don’t pass out, he told himself. Don’t make this any worse.

Kakashi raised a brow, his eyes filled with nothing but concern and confusion. Which definitely made it worse.

“You have nothing to apologize for Iruka.”

My name.

It sounds so much better coming from him.

Then darkness bloomed in his eyes once more, and this time he was far too weak to fight it. His hands fell limply to his side and the sound of Kakashi’s worried voice guided him into a deep, consuming abyss.

“Dammit- I need a medic over here!”

Kakashi looked around the chaos, seeking out someone more experienced in this area than he was. He knew some basic first aid, but he wasn’t willing to deal with head trauma- at least not the physical kind.

Unfortunately, his staff was pretty preoccupied at the moment.

Two had Uzumaki pinned down as a third was forcing a sedative into his arm, while several more were attempting to do the same with Sabaku and Uchiha. The two seemed pretty hellbent on finishing what they started, and Kakashi’s team was just as determined to stop them. Sasuke kept a firm grip on the journal Naruto had been fighting to get back and his glare met Gaara’s head on.

They continued to spit threats at each other- mainly Sasuke, who made it very clear that he had every intention of disemboweling Gaara as soon as he got the chance. The redhead didn’t seem in the least bit concerned by this, which only aggravated the raven more. Instead Gaara’s focus returned to the journal he had used to start this mess in the first place.

“Your boyfriend has something to hide” he taunted, “don’t you want to know what it is?”

Sasuke’s eyes darkened.

“I know he does.”

His gaze slipped over to Naruto’s. Those scared blues stared back at him, flickering between his eyes and the journal then back again. He was clearly terrified to see it in his hands, desperate to keep his secrets. Sasuke was tempted- of course he was tempted- but he wouldn’t do that to him.

Before Naruto was completely sedated, before he could wonder what he would do, Sasuke slid the journal over to him.

Sasuke watched it move with perfect precision into Naruto’s outstretched hand, saw the relief fill his eyes just before they rolled back in his head, and knew he made the right call. He could feel his own sedative taking over, pulling him away from the mayhem he had literally leapt into, and this time he chose not to fight it. If Naruto was out, and that red-headed bastard was out, he might as well be too.

With the three finally unconscious, the orderlies were finally free to attend to other matters, which is exactly what they did. Two immediately moved from the trio and ran over to Iruka. They carefully checked his injury as a third dropped down beside them, a first aid kit in hand.

Kakashi glanced over at his staff as they prepared to move his sedated patients. “Bring them to their rooms” he ordered. “They don’t need to be restrained.”

He paused for a moment then added, “and put that notebook in Uzumaki’s room.”

The orderlies nodded and tended to the three and Kakashi turned his focus back to the brunette beside him. He gently brushed his hair back to get a better look at his face. A bruise was forming on his cheek where he had been struck by Sasuke’s elbow, the deep purple shade a stark contrast against his paled skin.

Is that from blood loss or shock? he wondered.

Kakashi shifted his gaze to the orderlies treating him. They either didn’t notice the tenderness their boss was showing to their colleague or simply pretended not to. Either way it was appreciated.

“How is he?” he asked.

“He might need stitches. We’ll need to clean up the wound more to know for sure.”

“Can he be moved?”

“We’ve got the area bandaged up. We need to keep his neck stable while we get him on a gurney.”

Kakashi volunteered to help, and they took him up on his offer. A gurney was brought out and they carefully lifted Iruka onto it before shifting him to a cot. As soon as he was in place, they carted him off to the medical ward. Kakashi barked a few more orders to ensure that the other patients were seen to, then rushed off to join them.

He would stay by Iruka’s side.

And when he woke up, there were a few things he needed to tell him. Things that, after seeing Iruka bleed out on the floor like that, Kakashi realized he could no longer wait to say.

Chapter Text

“You must know.. surely, you must know...”

- Mr. Darcy

--

Kakashi flipped another page, fully immersed in his favorite book. Ok, maybe not fully immersed. He did glance up every few minutes to see if Iruka was awake yet, but so far no such luck.

He was feeling horribly restless, but he didn’t want to leave until Iruka regained consciousness. Meaning that he was stuck for who knows how long, waiting it out in the infirmary he usually went out of his way to avoid. Not that Kakashi had any issues with that particular facility. The staff all seemed to have excellent bedside manner, they were plenty competent in their field, and his patients were never unnecessarily brought here. Their standards were high, their procedures well executed- none of that was the issue. No, Kakashi’s reasons for being so uneasy in this place- in all hospitals for that matter- ran much deeper than that.

Kakashi might help people move past their pain, but that didn’t necessarily mean he’s found a way to get over his own. And hospitals just so happened to lie at the center of a lot of it.

Doesn’t matter, he reminded himself. I’m not leaving Iruka’s side until I get to say what I need to say.

After what might very well have been his hundredth time checking over his thoroughly worn copy of Icha Icha Paradise, Kakashi finally found those warm chestnut eyes opening up for him.

“Iruka..” he breathed, far more intimately than he had intended to.

He hurriedly cleared his throat, hoping to ease the intensity of it, but the damage was already done. He watched Iruka’s eyes shoot wide open, his shock plenty apparent.

“Kakashi?”

Now it was Kakashi’s turn to show his surprise. He wasn’t sure he had ever heard the man address him so informally before. At least not to his face. Iruka seemed just as aware of that fact, and just as eager to amend it.

“I mean, sir.. what are you doing here?”

The silver fox gave him a delicate smile, one that Iruka felt penetrate his skin and instantly warm every fiber of his being. It was almost unbearable. He couldn’t help but fidget under that look and the longer it lasted the worse it got.

It was wrong to accept a smile like that so easily. Iruka had ulterior motivates, and therefore misplaced hope. How would he ever be able to let go of his crush if he smiled at him like that?

“You.. you don’t need to be here” Iruka went on, needing to say something, to cut through the tension accumulating between them. “I know that you’re busy, sir, and I’m fine. I.. I made a mistake, but it won’t happen again.”

“Don’t do that.”

Iruka blinked, caught off guard by the seriousness in his voice, the heaviness in his gaze. “Do what?”

Kakashi closed his book without marking it, his eyes never leaving Iruka’s. He rose to his feet and slowly approached, every step sending a shiver down Iruka’s spine and anticipation shooting through his core.

Kakashi placed his hands on the cot and leaned in, bringing their faces level, keeping their eyes locked.

“Don’t pretend you don’t know.”

Iruka stared at him, more confused than ever. “What are you talking about?”

He watched those dark eyes search his face before slowly, noticeably, falling to his lips. Iruka couldn’t help but nervously lick them under that watchful stare and was sure he saw something ignite in them as he did.

What is he-

But Kakashi’s voice cut off his thoughts immediately. The sound of it, husky and low like that- Iruka had never heard it before. And he was shocked to hear it now.

“I find that actions speak louder than words” Kakashi said smoothly. His eyes gleamed with mischief as he sought out those curious chestnut eyes once more. “Wouldn’t you agree, Iruka?”

The way he said his name.. It echoed in his thoughts and reverberated down his spine, forcing him to shudder once more. Iruka watched Kakashi shift closer, saw his hand move towards his face, and still couldn’t make sense of what was happening. It couldn’t be what it looked like- that was impossible. But what else could it be?

“Sir..? What are you-”

Kakashi tangled his fingers in his hair, careful to avoid the bandages. He lightly fingered the loose ponytail before tightening his grip around it and giving it a sharp dominating jerk. Iruka couldn’t stop himself from gasping, though the sound was filled with far more pleasure than surprise. He was instantly mortified, but Kakashi looked nothing short of pleased.

“I was hoping you’d say that.”

Iruka still couldn’t tell if he was mocking him or flirting with him, or if this was something else entirely.

Kakashi wasn’t willing to wait for him to figure it out. He pulled the brunette towards him and pressed his smile against those soft lips, finally claiming them for himself. The way he’s wanted to for months. And, as it turns out, the real thing was by far better than he had imagined.

Iruka stiffened, utterly frozen in shock, but it didn’t last long. The heat of Kakashi’s embrace, the fire that’s been burning through him for so long, thawed his icy demeanor and melted away his inhibitions with it. Iruka scooted closer and wrapped his hand around the back of Kakashi’s neck, yanking him closer, moaning as their mouths pressed harder. He tilted his head, eager to deepen the kiss, and when Kakashi licked along his bottom lip he immediately granted him access.

“Mmnhnn.. nnhnn..”

Iruka couldn’t stop moaning in ecstasy. And he couldn’t get himself to care. This was everything he’s ever wanted- everything he’s been desperately, pitifully, pining after. He wanted Kakashi to devour him, ravish him. He didn’t want him to ever stop.

And the feeling appeared to be pretty mutual because it didn’t take much to convince that silver fox to crawl into bed with him.

Keeping their lips together, their tongues entangled, Kakashi climbed on top of him and gently pushed him back against the cot. Their bodies moved as one, puppets to their driving passion, and Iruka sank deeper. He slipped a hand under Kakashi’s shirt, sliding his palm up his back as he pulled him closer, wanting to feel every inch of his firm body pressed tight against his own. There was so much power in those taut muscles, his huge hands. Iruka wanted to know what it was like to be thrown down by them, dominated by them. He wondered how gentle those fingers could be when they were shoved deep inside, how rough they could be as they grabbed his waist.

Iruka’s cock pulsed with need, and he raised his core to rub it against Kakashi’s- wanting him to know just how willing he was. Unfortunately, that was enough to break whatever lustful spell he had been under. That they were both under.

Kakashi pulled back and propped himself up on his forearms, and reality slammed into Iruka like a freight train.

“Oh my god..” he breathed. “I- I’m so sorry. I don’t know what came over me.”

He tried to scoot back but Kakashi just shoved him back down with an exasperated sigh. “Iru-darling. You don’t really think this was all one-sided, do you?”

“Iru-what? Did you just-”

“Yes. I did.”

Kakashi lowered his face, bringing his mouth to Iruka’s ear. “And I meant it” he murmured. “Same as I meant this-”

He kissed his ear.

“And this-”

Then his neck.

“And this.”

He ground his hips against the brunette, smirking against his throat as he mewled beneath him.

Kakashi sat up once more, desire and amusement battling in his eyes. “But this isn’t exactly the perfect place for it.”

“Uhh.. yeah, yeah- sorry, I’m still trying to process what just happened..”

Kakashi sat up, adjusting his very obvious erection as he moved off of his equally enticed brunette. He sat on the edge of the cot and helped Iruka sit up to do the same, knowing he’d be able to think more clearly if he wasn’t trembling beneath him.

“You look confused” Kakashi remarked.

“Yeah, you could say that.”

Iruka shoved loose strands out of his face, shaking his head in disbelief. “Am I dreaming..?”

“Have you been dreaming about me, Iruka?”

“Of-of course not!”

“You’re a terrible liar, darling.”

Iruka’s face reddened. “What makes you say that?”

“It’s written all over your face.”

Iruka struggled to find the words to refute that, but Kakashi beat him to it.

“In fact, it has been. For a while now.”

Iruka felt something lodge in the back of his throat and cloud his eyes. He blinked it back, but his words came out disjointed and heavy on the way out.

“You’re.. making fun of me..”

All humor fell from Kakashi’s face. “Iruka. I’m being sincere.”

The brunette shook his head. Even after their whole passionate display he simply could not believe that someone like Kakashi would be interested in someone like him. 

“Kakashi.. I mean, sir, I don’t need your sympathy. You don’t need to force yourself to-”

The silver fox gave him an incredulous look. “You can’t seriously think I would do all of that out of pity.”

“You’re saying it isn’t?”

It was such a preposterous accusation that Kakashi didn’t even know where to start. “You don’t plan on making this easy for me, do you.”

Iruka tilted his head, brows furrowed in blatant confusion. “What?”

Kakashi shook his head, still flabbergasted by the brunette’s relentless denial. “Let’s talk about this more at dinner, hm? Tonight. I’ll pick you up at seven.”

“Dinner?” 

“Well.. to start.” Kakashi gave him an impish look, not bothering to hide his deviousness. “We’ll see where it goes from there.”

Iruka stared at him- his boss, his longtime crush, and by far the sexiest man he had ever seen- in absolute bewilderment. He couldn’t help but wonder if this place had finally rubbed off on him and he had completely gone insane.

Hell, maybe they both have.

“This is real, right?”

“I enjoy having you here, Iruka, but you’re not a patient of mine. That would be entirely inappropriate.”

“And being my boss isn’t?”

“Not unless you want it to be.”

Kakashi noticed the heat in his gaze, one that Iruka was terrible at hiding. He grinned. “In that case, maybe we should have.. dinner at my place instead?”

Iruka blinked- once, twice, three times- but Kakashi was still sitting there, still flirting with him, completely unabashed to show his interest. His mouth was still swollen from the passionate embrace and his cock still strained with triggered and pent-up desire. It was implausible, impossible, and yet unmistakably real.

Iruka rubbed his hand down his face, an incredulous laugh falling from his lips.

“I think I hit my head harder than I thought..”

--

Gaara wasn’t exactly sure how he pulled it off, maybe they just gave a lesser sentence to the new guy here, but some how he had been released from his room before the two he had antagonized.

Not that he was complaining. He had no interest in staying locked up in a padded cell for some indefinite length of time, but with the others gone he was back to square one. The blonde had been so easy to rile up, and his boyfriend’s response to it was just as interesting. Gaara had been hoping to play with those two a bit more, but it looked like that wouldn’t be happening for a while.

Which just meant that in the meantime he’d have to find a new toy to play with.

Gaara tucked his hands in his sweatpants pockets as he strolled around the room, searching every face along the way. He never knew what he was looking for necessarily- only that he’d recognize it the second he saw it.

Maybe it was a sort of innocence that he sought after- the kind of person he could thoroughly taint, that he could leave his mark with. Someone who wouldn’t be able to easily forget him- who wouldn’t be able to abandon their memories of him no matter how badly they wanted to.

Maybe there were certain features he was after. Gaara couldn’t deny that he was attracted to his playthings, on one level or another. Sometimes to the point where he would make a move, try to push for more.. for a lot more. Sometimes just enough to tease them a bit, or simply because he enjoyed the sight of them while he made them squirm.

Yes, Gaara would know it when he saw it. And when he did, when he found the perfect toy, he would hold on tight.

And he wouldn’t let go.

The thought occurred to him at the exact moment that he spotted his next target.

Gaara smiled.

He’s perfect.

The redhead walked with newfound purpose, his eyes locked on the tempting new toy sitting by the window. He was alone and so far completely unaware of his presence, which was even better. Gaara grabbed a chair on his way over and dropped it down in front of him. The brunette turned to look at him in surprise, but he didn’t seem scared.

Not yet.

Gaara sat down across from him and without a word bent forward and reached between his legs. He watched him flinch, but he wasn’t fast enough. Gaara grabbed hold of the chair under him and roughly jerked him closer. Huge brown eyes stared at him and a slight yelp fell from his lips as he was jostled forward.

“No reason to be scared” Gaara said slyly. “I don’t bite.”

The brunette quickly regained his composure and even went so far as to give him a pointed look.

“I have a hard time believing that.”

Gaara’s grin widened. “What’s your name?”

“I’ll tell you if you let go of my chair.”

Gaara tilted his head, eyeing his new toy and thoroughly enjoying the view. He leaned in, invading more of that oh so coveted space.

“I have a hard time believing that” he echoed back.

He watched the brunette swallow hard, his brave facade slowly beginning to crack.

Just as he had hoped it would.

Gaara licked his lips. “Your name” he said firmly. “Let’s hear it.”

He could see him trying to figure out a way out of this. Those nervous cinnamon eyes shot over towards the orderlies, but they weren’t looking their way. And even if they happened to, Gaara had him angled just right- they would never know that he needed their help. Not unless he shouted out for it. And this one didn’t seem like the type to do that- at least, not right away.

Left with little alternative, and already wary of how close Gaara continued to get, the brunette finally gave in.

“Kiba” he said quietly.

“My name.. is Kiba.”

Chapter Text

“We are but wayward leaves, scattered to the air by an indifferent wind.”

- Over the Garden Wall

--

https://drive.google.com/uc?id=1rK1ZCdoKdzD6kSIPzunzFUmjS49Y2y8g

This gorgeous work of art was drawn by the wonderfully talented Mia, also known on here as nyarutoo.

I have never had anyone create fanart for one of my stories before and I am still in awe. Thank you, Mia- it’s beautiful and I am truly honored.

You lovely readers will soon find that Mia’s artwork goes perfectly with this chapter. Sasuke and Naruto will be returning to their favorite chair, a very special journal in hand.

And now that I have you sufficiently curious… shall we continue?

--

Kakashi glanced down, smoothed a wrinkle from his black button up, and reached back to adjust his collar. He left his sleeves rolled partially up his forearms, knowing how much Iruka enjoyed the sight- especially when he gave them a good flex. Kakashi noticed his wandering eye quite some time ago, and still got a kick out of how oblivious Iruka was when he did the same thing back. You would think that someone with that face, that lean tight body, would be a bit more aware of how alluring he was, but his little brunette didn’t seem to see any of it.

Not to worry, Kakashi thought. I’ll be showing Iru-darling a lot of things tonight.

Feeling confident, cocky even, Kakashi bounded up the front steps and gave the door a gentle knock. He could hear approaching footsteps on the other side and used the time he had left to tousle his hair a bit, knowing it would entice his little brunette even more. At the sound of the lock clicking he dropped his hand and as the door opened, Kakashi offered his most dazzling smile.

One look and Iruka all but melted into a simpering starry-eyed puddle across the threshold.

Christ. If the mere sight of the guy was enough to make him completely lose his composure, how the hell was he ever going to get through a date?

“Hi..” Iruka breathed, his brain and tongue still struggling to find something worth saying.  

Kakashi took a step towards him and Iruka was just as tempted to fall into his arms as he was to stumble away from him. In the end he chose to stay frozen in place, waiting to see what he would do next instead.

Kakashi didn’t appear to be bothered by his apprehension in the slightest. Rather, he seemed unusually comfortable with him. The unabashed silver fox simply stepped inside, wrapped an arm around Iruka’s waist, and pulled him in for a light kiss. It was gentle, but still managed to slam through Iruka with exceptional force, leaving his knees weak and his pulse erratic.

Kakashi pulled back and met his eyes sooner than Iruka would have liked, his hand still lingering at his hip.

“Hi” he answered back, his voice just as soft as his touch.

“Wow..”

Kakashi grinned and Iruka’s face reddened.

“No, I mean, umm.. are we.. going, uhh, somewhere?”

Iruka’s flush deepened as he stumbled all over his words like a damned fool. He silently chided himself for being so awkward and hoped it would wear off as the night continued.

“Well, that depends.”

Iruka raised a brow. “On?”

“Two things, really.” Kakashi’s fingers moved across his waist, his touch hot as he kneaded against him suggestively. “Whether you want to start with dessert” he murmured. “And just how long you can wait to have it.”

Iruka’s lips parted, his breath caught, and Kakashi was suddenly tempted to make the decision for him.

“Do you.. want an honest answer?” his soon-to-be uke finally managed to ask.

Kakashi slid a hand behind Iruka’s neck, his long fingers teasing his hair. “Of course.”

“I think dinner can wait.”

Desire bloomed in those dark eyes and despite its incredible heat, Iruka shivered under that stare.

“You know, I couldn’t agree more.”

Kakashi’s grip on his waist tightened as he dragged him closer, one final question on the tip of his tongue before he put the thing to far better use.

“My place or yours?”

--

“It’s Gaara, right?”

“I don’t recall telling you my name, Kiba.”

The brunette shrugged. “I heard the orderlies talking about you.”

“And you just couldn’t help yourself, could you.”

“I guess not.”

Gaara gave the brunette an amused look, which Kiba chose to ignore. It only made him want to antagonize him more.

Gaara draped an arm around his shoulders and steered him away from others. “No need to be shy, Kiba. You can just admit that you were thinking about me.”

“Is that what you think?”

Gaara was surprised by Kiba’s answer, his confidence, and his own faltered for a moment. He was quick to collect himself, however, and chose to assume that the brunette failed to notice.

“I think you’re enjoying my attention.”

Kiba pushed his arm off his shoulder and took a step back. “You don’t know me, Gaara.”

Once again, he was taken aback by him and had to move fast to recover. “A few days just isn’t enough for you, is it? Then, how about you let me get to know you a little better, hm?”

Gaara stepped close and slowly ran his hand up the brunette’s thigh, making his intentions clear. “Wanna see how far we can go before they make me stop?”

The brunette took a quick step back, hitting the wall behind him. “Stop” he breathed, just as surprised by the wall’s presence as he was the redhead’s brazenness.

Gaara grinned. Now this he was familiar with.

“Sorry, doesn’t count unless you’re one of them.”

Gaara nodded his head towards a group of white-clad orderlies that were currently preoccupied talking down several heightened patients. He slid a hand up to Kiba’s hip and dug his fingers into it with bruising force, adrenaline humming under his skin, making him jittery with excitement. He couldn’t believe how much he was getting away with here. How little the orderlies had seen so far.

“How many fingers do you think I can get inside of you before they notice?”

Kiba gave him a sad look, which was not the one he had expected to find. And absolutely not what he wanted. Gaara’s eyes hardened, but he forced his voice to stay casual, his smile devilish and playful despite the two cold pits above.

“If you were going to say three, I’m gonna be honest- I think I could do more.”

“Do you push people away on purpose?”

Gaara’s grip on the brunette slackened in his surprise and his arm fell back to his side as the words traveled through him, as they left their mark.

“What..?”

“Do you really want to do those things with me” Kiba pressed, “or are you just trying to scare me off before you get too close?”

Gaara stared at him, suddenly at a loss for words.

“I see” Kiba said quietly. “So, it’s both. Then maybe I’ll give you a taste of both.”

While Gaara’s brain was still struggling to catch up Kiba leaned in, quickly checked that they weren’t being watched, and kissed him on the corner of his mouth. And then, just as quickly, he walked away.

Reality finally kicked in, but by then it didn’t matter. Kiba had already told an orderly that he had made another patient uncomfortable and asked to be put in his room so he could ‘reflect on his actions’- leaving him completely out of reach. And Gaara was left even more stunned than he was before.

He had never seen anything like it.

This particular toy of his was proving to be far more unpredictable than most. Gaara had expected those wide innocent eyes of his to belong to someone who would be easy to intimidate, to manipulate, but this one definitely didn’t make things that simple. Kiba was attractive in a way that stood out from most, naïve enough to keep Gaara interested, but he was also one to push back and call him on his bullshit. And Gaara was surprised to find that he actually didn’t hate it.

Usually when his little companions pushed back hard enough, he’d either lose interest, his temper, or both. He’d lash out, lose them one way or another, then move onto a new challenge without a second thought. But for some reason it was different with Kiba. Gaara had never been so drawn to someone like this before, and he couldn’t make up his mind on how he wanted to handle it.

Part of him just wanted to bend him over and claim him without abandon, to taste every inch of him and watch his eyes roll in ecstasy and forget about everything else. Another part of him simply wanted to tear him apart- slowly, cruelly, until there was nothing left but fear and resentment.

Gaara wanted to earn his affection just as badly as he wanted to inspire his hate, and yet neither seemed completely feasible. He knew he had managed to make Kiba anxious, that he was nervous when he invaded his space, and yet he didn’t avoid him. Kiba didn’t run when he approached, but he never came to him on his own accord either. He tried to move past him when he cornered him, but eventually backed down and just talked to him when he couldn’t escape.

Was he just placating him, trying to keep it seem casual to avoid harm? Or was the guy truly unbothered by his presence once he accepted that he wasn’t going anywhere?

And why was Gaara so fucking hellbent on figuring him out? The blonde from before- with his secrets and that feral boyfriend- they were entertainment. That’s what he was really after. A way to pass the time, to keep himself sufficiently amused and everyone else at arm’s reach. That was what he wanted. But those two were still locked up in isolation and Gaara had no choice but to settle for this new toy instead.

Kiba was nothing but a quick fix to a temporary problem. One that would be replaced just as quickly. He meant nothing to him. Just a means to an end.

That’s definitely all this was.

As soon as Blondie and the raven-haired bastard were back out in the open, Kiba would fall to the wayside. He would have served his purpose and wouldn’t need to do so again until those two were inevitably locked up once more. This infatuation that Gaara felt, the desperation that made him want to cling to Kiba and refuse to let him out of his sight- it was temporary. He wanted to taunt him, to break everything that mattered to him, because that’s what he always did.

Everything with Kiba was the same as it’s always been with everyone before him, and with all of the ones that would come after.

…Right?

Gaara had almost had himself half-convinced of that truth- the one he’s always known, always clung to- but it slipped when he saw Kiba again. Just as it had everytime he’s tried to talk down his feelings for the last three days.

Gaara couldn’t figure it out, but somehow that little brunette had found a way to tear his sense of self to fucking shreds.

And what was even more bewildering-

he didn’t want him to stop.

So despite the whirlwind of emotions tangling his insides and clawing their way through him, Gaara made his way straight for Kiba that morning- the same as he had every morning. The brunette no longer seemed surprised by this, and he didn’t need to look up to know who was so eagerly approaching. So this time he didn’t. Kiba continued to ponder his canvas, a brush in hand and a smear of red paint across his cheek. Gaara eyed it, wondering if it was on purpose or just a bizarre coincidence that he always managed to get the same color on his face, before turning his focus back to the rest of him. He gave his best impish smile and raised a hand to finger the ends of his shaggy auburn hair.

“Fancy finding you here..”

Cinnamon eyes, flat and utterly unimpressed, slid his way. Kiba eyed him briefly before shifting his attention back to his art. “How about doing something constructive for a change, hm?”

Gaara blinked, surprised by the mouthy brunette yet again. But he wouldn’t let him have the last word- not this time. “Did you have something in mind?” he said suggestively.

Kiba either didn’t hear it or didn’t care to acknowledge it. Either way it irritated him. Gaara was about to make those feelings clear when the brunette finally spoke.

“Do you like art?”

“Life drawing” Gaara replied smoothly. He stepped close, forcing the brunette to look at him again. Just as he had hoped. Gaara shifted closer and this time Kiba matched his progress with one quick step back.

Much better.

Gaara closed in, easily backing him into a corner. Before Kiba could do anything to stop him, Gaara took hold of his wrist and shoved it to the side, keeping his paintbrush away as he slipped his fingers along the waistband of his sweats. The brunette trembled under his touch, and Gaara’s smile widened.

 “How about we take these off. You can model for me.”

“Are you like this with everyone?” Kiba said quietly.

“And if I said yes?”

Kiba pulled his wandering hand away, but Gaara had yet to free his wrist. He glanced at it briefly before returning his gaze back to those cold jade eyes.

“I’d ask why I never see it.”

Gaara’s grip on him tightened as a rush of anger slammed through him. “You think you’re special?” he growled.

“Not at all.”

“Good.”

Gaara said it with a sneer, but it curdled the second the word fell from his lips. He didn’t mean it, couldn’t even stand the feel of the word in his mouth, and Kiba knew it. He didn’t know how, but it was clear that he did.

“What the hell is it going to take for you to hate me?” Gaara muttered, a thought he immediately wished he had kept to himself.

Kiba raised a brow. “Is it easier for you that way, Gaara?”

Gaara’s fist flew before he had time to think about what he was doing. Those words, that truth, it twisted his gut, his mind, and he couldn’t stand it. He punched Kiba across the face, hard, and watched as he crumpled to the ground.

Usually it would leave him with a sense of victory, at least some semblance of satisfaction, but this time he only felt regret. It left a bitter taste on his tongue and made his chest ache. He wanted to take it back, to fix what he had undoubtedly broken, but he couldn’t undo what was already done.

It was the first time in ten years that he wished he could.

He knelt beside the brunette, watching him struggle to sit up. “Kiba, I-”

Gaara wasn’t sure if he would have apologized to him or not. It wasn’t something he was accustomed to doing, but it had felt like something he may have done if he hadn’t been tackled to the ground at that exact moment. He struggled to look up at him, trying to find those dark eyes as the orderlies manhandled and restrained him, but Kiba went out of his way to avoid seeing him. Gaara called out to him, refusing to give up, but Kiba wouldn’t respond.

As the orderlies pulled him out of the room, Gaara couldn’t stop wondering why it hurt so bad to see him turn away.

--

Both Naruto and Sasuke were forced to stay in their rooms for four days after the latest incident. Sasuke probably would have been locked away longer if it weren’t for the swooning nurses and his deceiving flirtation.

Truthfully he was relieved that he didn’t have to act on it- he wasn’t sure that he could. Sasuke usually wasn’t above feeling up a few dresses for favors, tasting a few clueless lips as he swindled his way out of trouble, but things were different now. His sights were set on one person and one person only, and while he wasn’t usually the loyal type, this time was different.

Naruto had already guessed that that was what Sasuke was up to, but he still didn’t understand how he managed to get away with so much because of it. Nevertheless, he was grateful for it. He wasn’t sure that he was ready to face that new guy again without him, and was relieved that he wouldn’t have to. Initially, that is.

The more he thought about it though, the more he wondered if it was the better choice. Naruto didn’t know how much the redhead knew about him, how much of his journal he managed to read before he showed up. How much would he reveal to Sasuke? What if he said something to him the next time they came face to face?

Having his own past shoved in his face was already horrifying enough, but at least it was nothing he didn’t already know. Naruto couldn’t stand the thought of Sasuke finding out things about him like that. Especially the kind of things he kept in his journals.

Maybe I should be doing this alone.

But that chance disappeared the morning he was escorted back into the community room. Because as soon as he stepped into it, Sasuke was already rushing to his side. Luckily, the redhead he dreaded seeing again was nowhere in sight, so his worries dwindled. There was always a chance that he would come in later, but at least for now he was safe. And his secrets left unexposed.

Naruto let Sasuke take hold of his hand, which the orderlies continued to let him get away with for some reason, and pull him over to their chair. The raven made a detour along the way to grab a notebook and pen without commenting on either, before settling in his spot and pulling his blonde down with him.

Naruto eyed the supplies in his hands momentarily before finding his eyes, his wide almost expressionless gaze locked in place. Sasuke smiled at the familiar look, that unblinking stare that initially drew him towards the blonde in a fit of rage and somewhere along the way became a source of his unending infatuation.

“Why did you..” Naruto let the fractured question hover between them, knowing he didn’t need to bother finishing it.

Sasuke handed the notebook and pen over. “For you.”

Naruto gave him a curious look. “I already have a journal” he pointed out.

“Yes, I’m aware of that.”

“Then why..?”

“This one’s different.”

“Because it’s blank?”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. “Christ, Naruto. No- it’s different because this is one you can share with me.”

When Naruto still looked hopelessly confused, Sasuke decided to clarify further- though admittedly his patience was fading pretty fast.

“You don’t want anyone reading your other ones, right?”

“Right.”

“So, I won’t” Sasuke said simply. “But that doesn’t mean I want you to keep everything from me. I figure this journal could be ours. One that you’re willing to let me read.”

Those cerulean pools grew, understanding flickering in their depths. “I.. I’ve never done that before.”

The raven gave him a crooked grin, one that made his heart skip a beat.

“We’ll have a lot of firsts together, Naruto. I thought you knew that by now.”

The blonde blushed, which Sasuke thoroughly enjoyed.

“So.. is that a yes?”

Naruto tilted his head. “A yes to what?”

The raven grated his teeth together, barely able to contain the countless angry things he was tempted to spew all over him. “Naruto. Will you write in this fucking journal with me.”

Ok, fine. It didn’t come out exactly as he had planned, but in his defense he could only handle repeating himself so many times. As far as Sasuke was concerned, that was a pretty tame reaction to it. And Naruto didn’t seem too bothered by his short response, so he decided not to worry about it.

“Yes. I’ll use the journal” he finally agreed. “But.. I’m not sure what to put in it.”

“Well, when you can’t find the right words to say, you can just write them down” Sasuke said, knowing that it was a constant issue for the blonde. “And you know.. maybe you can start sharing some things about yourself.”

“Like what?”

“I don’t know. Your past?”

Naruto flinched.

“Your family?”

His face paled.

“What kind of illusions you’ve seen..?”

Naruto looked like he was going to be physically sick.

“Ok, why don’t we start simple.”

Sasuke took the pen from his horrified blonde, and the notebook, and opened to the second page, choosing to leave the first one blank.

Just in case.

He drew a line down the center of the page and wrote his name on one side, and Naruto’s on the other. He saw his blonde give him another curious look, but he didn’t ask yet and Sasuke didn’t explain. Instead, he added a title across the top then handed the notebook back to Naruto. The blonde had a difficult time tearing his gaze away from Sasuke, as he always did, but he managed to force himself to look down and read what he wrote.

Favorites.

“Favorite what?”

“Exactly. That’s what we’ll start with.”

Naruto’s stare returned and Sasuke took the notebook back.

“Hmm.. let’s start simple. How about… favorite food.”

He wrote ‘food’ on each side of the divide and handed it back to Naruto.

“Write your answer on your side, and I’ll write my answer on mine.”

For some reason Naruto continued to look confused and Sasuke was already regretting starting this.

“Can you try not making this difficult?”

“I just don’t understand why you care what my favorite food is.”

Sasuke sighed, his exasperation palpable. “Stop trying to understand and just answer the damn question.”

Naruto thought for a moment before scrawling something down, then returned the notebook. Sasuke glanced at his answer and raised a brow.

“Ramen? Your favorite food is ramen.”

“Is that bad?”

“Isn’t that just what they give like everyday here?”

Naruto shrugged. “Isn’t that kind of the point? We get to have it every day.”

“Opposed to?”

“Not having food every day.”

Sasuke paused at that and something heavy settled in his chest. He eyed that sweet honest face, the scars he had yet to explain, and suddenly wanted to know everything there was to know about him.

“Naruto.. did you not have food everyday before you lived here?”

The blonde tilted his head, genuinely puzzled by the question. “Did you?”

“Yes” Sasuke said automatically, like the answer should be incredibly obvious. Like it shouldn’t even be a question. “I did. And you should have too.”

“I guess that’s true..”

“But you didn’t” Sasuke went on, knowing Naruto would answer honestly.

“No.”

Sasuke dropped his eyes to the notebook once more. Suddenly this game wasn’t as fun as he thought it’d be.

But at least I’m getting some answers, right?

“Aren’t you supposed to write yours too?”

Sasuke sighed, wrote his answer and handed it back. Naruto read it and a hint of a smile flickered on his face, easing some of the tension that had found its way between them.

“Tomatoes?”

“What’s wrong with tomatoes?”

Naruto shrugged. “Nothing, I guess. They just aren’t very exciting.”

“And ramen is?”

“It’s filling. You would need a lot of tomatoes to feel full.”

Sasuke rubbed the bridge of his nose. “I don’t think you understand how favorite things work.”

Naruto didn’t respond, and for once Sasuke was actually relieved by his silence. He decided it was best to move on to another category, which hopefully would be a little more painless than the last.

“Ok, how about favorite animal.”

Naruto grabbed the pen immediately and jotted his answer without hesitation.

“Well that was fast. What’d you put?” Sasuke took the journal and looked down. “A fox.” His eyes lifted to his blonde and he couldn’t help but smile. “Seems fitting.”

“What’s yours?”

“Crow” Sasuke said as he wrote it down.

“I know someone who controls them” Naruto blurted out without thinking. “Funny.. you kind of look like him too.”

Sasuke gave him a bewildered look and Naruto quickly realized his mistake. He tried to figure out how to take it back, how to change what he said, but it was too late. Sasuke had locked onto it, and he wasn’t letting it go that easily.

“Someone who controls them.”

“No, I mean.. I just meant-”

Those dark eyes widened. “An illusion.”

Naruto’s mouth snapped shut which made Sasuke all the more curious.

“Why are you so afraid to talk about them?”

“I’m not afraid.”

“Then why won’t you tell me?” Sasuke pressed.

“I don’t want you to realize how crazy I am.”

“I know why you’re in here, Naruto. I know you hallucinate. Did you seriously forget how we met? You thought I was one of your illusions.”

Naruto bit his lip. “I know.”

Sasuke studied his face for a moment, trying to read what was always so perfectly hidden. “You can trust me with this, Naruto.”

“… I know.”

“But you won’t.”

Sasuke didn’t realize how much that bothered him until he said it out loud. But once he put voice to it, he couldn’t shake that feeling. Like fuel to an ever-present flame, it ignited the rage inside of him, and Sasuke couldn’t hide it. He shot to his feet, the notebook clenched tight in his fist, eyes burning as he glared at his silent watchful blonde.

“You see me at my worst every fucking day” he snapped. “But you won’t let me see this side of you? Why the fuck do you feel the need to hide from me?!”

Naruto wanted to respond, but he didn’t know how. He could see that his silence was only making things worse, but he was sure that his words would do the same and the fear of that kept them lodged deep in his throat. He could see a few orderlies take a step towards them, already preparing to intervene.

But I just got him back.

“S-Sasuke. Please, let’s just talk, ok? They’ll take you away again if you-”

“Do you even want me here?”

“Yes” Naruto all but shouted. “I don’t want you to go.”

Sasuke glared at him a moment longer before finally sitting beside him once more. His anger was far from over, but he seemed to have convinced the staff that he had regained his composure. For now, at least.

“Tell me about the man I look like. The one that controls the crows.”

“It’ll sound crazy to you..”

“Does it look like I fucking care?”

“No.”

Naruto sighed, then took the notebook and pen from Sasuke and flipped to a new page. His hand moved fast as his mind flickered back to the man he used to always see outside his window. He could see him clear as day, in his head at least. That long ebony hair that hung in thick curtains around a pale angular face. His eyes were dark like Sasuke’s but sometimes the light caught them in a way that made them seem almost red- a drop of blood in spilled ink.

He had scars on his face too. They carved a path down from the corners of his eyes and followed the curve of his cheek- paving a perfect path for future tears to follow. A long cloak hung heavy on his shoulders, almost like he had his own set of wings. Just another dark omen among crows.

Naruto sketched all of it, his hand darting across the page without pause- like he had drawn it a hundred times before. Crows fluttered around the man and a murder of them rose above his head, spiraling until they were out of sight. Until there wasn’t enough paper to follow their trail.

Sasuke watched in silence as Naruto’s art, his illusion, unraveled before him. He didn’t even know he was capable of drawing, and at first he was simply impressed by the masterpiece he created. But as more details brought the image to life, his mind was pulled in a completely different direction.

“You saw him a lot?” he said quietly.

Naruto nodded. “He was always outside my window. I.. actually kind of miss seeing him.” Something pained flickered in Naruto’s eyes as he looked back up at him, surprising Sasuke.

“He was one of the nice ones.”

“Did he.. talk to you?”

Naruto’s stare was back and Sasuke made sure to meet it, to show him that he wasn’t shying away from this. That hearing about his hallucination didn’t make him want him any less.

“No. He only talked to the crows.”

“Is that what made him so nice?”

Sasuke could have sworn he saw a hint of a smile, but if he did it didn’t stay.

“Maybe.”

“What made you like having him around?” Sasuke asked, not ready to let the subject drop just yet. This was the most Naruto had ever revealed about himself- he didn’t want to ruin the chance to know more.

“The crows felt like.. protection, I think. Like they kept me safe. He was the one who put them there. And..”

“And?”

“He has scars too.”

Sasuke glanced down at the drawing, only now noticing the deep grooves in the man’s face. “You felt like you could relate to him.”

“A little.”

Sasuke eyed the drawing a bit longer before meeting those heavy blues again. “He looks sad.”

“He does.”

“Does he always look like that?”

“Yes.”

Sasuke paused, searching for the right words before he spoke. “Are you always sad, Naruto?”

The blonde was quiet at first, and Sasuke stomach dropped. Thankfully, he didn’t let the silence last too long. “I used to be.”

“And now..?”

“Now..” he said slowly, “now it seems like I’m only sad when you’re gone.”

Sasuke took his hand and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Then I’ll try my best to stay.”

Naruto felt a smile pulling at his face once more, one that he hoped looked far less alarming than the many he had practiced unsuccessfully in the mirror. And while Sasuke’s beautiful dark eyes always beckoned him in, and it was incredibly difficult to pull away from them once he started, Naruto could feel something else pulling him away this time.

It was like an itch in the far recesses of his mind- one that he couldn’t ignore. The sensation gnawed on his nerve. He bit his tongue hard, trying to force back the feeling, but its presence was getting stronger. He bounced his leg to ease the feeling, but his anxiety spiked with its pace and he quickly changed tactics. Dr. Kakashi had taught him a way to self-manage rising panic attacks and manic outbursts- at least, before they got too strong. Naruto tapped his feet one at a time- left, right, left, right- forcing his mind to file the chaos back into order.

Sasuke placed a hand on his knee and only then did Naruto realize that he had been calling for him, his voice getting louder as his concern went unanswered.

“Naruto? Hey, talk to me- are you ok?”

The blonde blinked. He was surprised to find that he wasn’t staring into Sasuke’s eyes as he usually was- which was probably just as surprising to Sasuke. No, his gaze had been lost in someone else’s.

Naruto furrowed his brows before finally tearing his distracted blues away from the eyes he had drawn to the ones staring back at him.

The real ones.

“Yeah” he said, “yeah, I’m ok.”

Sauske was shocked.

Not because it was the strangest thing for someone to say, not because he had any particularly alarming look on his face. It wasn’t even necessarily because he had lost Naruto’s attention for a moment there when he was staring down at his own drawing.

No, Sasuke was completely thrown off guard because Naruto was lying.

And they both knew it.

Chapter Text

“I’m inside your grapefruit.”

- Supernatural

--

Naruto couldn’t ignore it.

He wanted to, he really did, but it was quite literally driving him insane at this point. What had started as a slight craving had quickly manifested into a full-blown obsession- one that burned in his brain, branding him. His skin crawl with need, the feeling festering until it made him feel physically ill. He trembled violently, like an addict without a fix- a persistent itch he couldn’t scratch lodged deep in his head.

After a while he could even see it. Thoughts merged with delusions and now there were bumps raising up, moving in his skin, just under the surface. They shifted up his arms, his neck, scurrying across his chest and slowly burrowed deeper. He scratched at them, but every time he did they just multiplied. The itching grew to desperate clawing as he fought to get them out, and soon panicky shrieks were tearing from his throat. Several orderlies rushed into his room and grabbed his hands, forcing him to stop, but it only made it worse. There was nothing to keep those things from invading the rest of his body, moving deeper inside, and it terrified him.

Naruto threw his head back and screamed, his voice cracking under the weight of his terror. He pleaded for them to cut them out- the nameless things writhing under his skin- but no one else could see what he saw.

More drugs were forced into his veins, feeding what was already inside. They were getting bigger, but the orderlies still couldn’t see what they had done to him. Naruto’s screams grew more frantic, and still they cruelly refused to help him. He cursed them for their callousness and called out to the one person who actually did care about him, hating that Sasuke was too far to hear it.

Then the meds took over- clouding his vision and clearing his mind. And suddenly he could see all of this for what it really was. The things under his skin were nothing more than a manifestation, an explanation he had conjured up in his head- a way to make sense of that sharp desire he felt.

When he had drawn the man who controls crows, he had unknowingly pulled the illusion back into his life. And Naruto was suddenly desperate to have it back. He missed his unbalanced mind- the hallucinations, the comfort of a chaos he knew. He wanted it back. Needed it back.

Naruto was embarrassed to show that side of himself to Sasuke, but he couldn’t deny it to himself. It didn’t have to be everyday- the people here would never allow that- but it couldn’t be none. It just couldn’t.

Before Naruto’s consciousness completely faded away, he made a decision. Tomorrow he would skip the meds. By then whatever the orderlies had shot into his veins should dwindle to nothing, and then he’d be free. Free to be himself again.

I’m sorry Sasuke, I just can’t stand another second without them.

Then his eyes and awareness rolled back, lost somewhere in his head, and he was pulled into the endless comfort of a familiar darkness- the same color as Sasuke’s eyes.

The color of crows.

--

Sasuke chewed at his thumb nail, worrying it down to next to nothing as he anxiously paced his room. Something’s wrong. Something’s wrong and he isn’t telling me. Why wouldn’t he tell me?

Why would he lie to me?

Of all of the things he’s admitted to me, how many times he’s been so ridiculously open and honest, why would this be what he lies about?

It didn’t make any sense, which only bothered him more.

Sasuke stormed over to his door, and knocked on it hard, his fist slamming against the stubborn slab with bruising force. “Hey!! Nurse! Come here- I need to talk to you!”

He waited impatiently, his frustration growing with every silent second, until finally someone showed up. The small panel in his door slid back, revealing a face he recognized. Just not one he was hoping for.

Goddamnit.

“Not you” he snarled. “Send a different nurse.”

Mizuki gave him an annoyed look, unmistakable disgust flickering in his judgmental gaze. “I’m not a nurse, Uchiha, I’m an orderly. And I don’t work for you.”

“Did I fucking stutter?” Sasuke snapped. “Bring me someone else!”

The man glared at him, his own anger rising. “You going to behave yourself? Or am I going to need to restrain you to your cot?”

“If you touch me, I’ll break your fucking hand” he growled back.

Sasuke despised this bastard, far more than the rest. He’s seen the hate in his eyes, the disapproving looks. You could practically smell the stench of homophobia wafting off of him. And what’s more, he hated that he directed it at Naruto too. Sasuke could handle it- in fact he always welcomed a reason to beat the shit out of some dirtbag. But that didn’t mean he was ok with someone subjecting his blonde to it. He didn’t want anyone or anything to give Naruto a reason to question their relationship.

Mizuki sneered at him, weighing the pros and cons of stepping into that room. While he would love nothing more than to tie the Uchiha down and teach him a valuable lesson, he was definitely not interested in getting himself in a position where he would have to fend him off. In the end, he decided it just wasn’t worth the risk.

“I’ll pretend I didn’t hear that” he muttered. “Do yourself a favor and go to sleep, will ya?”

When Sasuke continued to look unconvinced, he added, “Wouldn’t want to be locked away tomorrow instead of seeing your little boy toy, now would you?”

A feral cry tore from Sasuke’s throat and he launched himself at the door. Mizuki quickly slammed the panel closed before Sasuke could get his fingers through it, which only pissed him off more.

“You fucking bastard!! Get back here, asshole! Get the fuck back here!!”

Mizuki shook his head at what he decided was the Uchiha’s unreasonable outrage and made his way back down the hall, choosing to ignore it. A few orderlies rushed over to him, having heard the shouting from their own posts, but Mizuki quickly talked down their concerns.

“He’ll tire himself out” he assured them.

The others didn’t look all that convinced, but they didn’t challenge him on it which he supposed was the best he could ask for.

Sasuke’s screaming went on for far longer than expected, but eventually he exhausted himself and it faded down to nothing. Just as he knew it would.  

Mizuki’s ears were still ringing, phantom echoes of the Uchiha’s irate cries still floating around in his head in the resounding silence. But after a while Mizuki was relieved to find that they too were gone.

He uttered a few hateful slurs under his breath as he made his way back to his desk, plenty irritated himself. Then he settled back in his chair, turned on some music, and let his mind wander back to the events that took place earlier this week. He could still see the look on Iruka’s face when he realized he had left him to fend for himself. The moment when Sasuke’s elbow slammed into that face, and the satisfaction Mizuki felt seeing him fall back.

A smile pulled at his own as the image replayed for him. And, just as all the other times before, Mizuki chose to disregard the sudden heat in his groin as he pictured Iruka lying there- dazed and helpless on the floor.

A heat that was slowly becoming more difficult to ignore.

--

“Hey, Sasuke?”

“Hmm?”

“Would you grab me a water?”

The raven gave the blonde a curious look. It wasn’t a ridiculous request, but it felt out of place. In fact, he couldn’t shake the suspicion that Naruto was just trying to get him to leave. He just didn’t understand why.

You’re being paranoid, he told himself. Which, truth be told, was pretty likely- it was one of Sasuke’s wonderful character flaws after all.

In the end he couldn’t justify not getting him one and rose to his feet to do just that. “Yeah.. sure, Naruto.”

He reluctantly stepped away as Naruto fitzed around with the supplies on the art cart- his immediate destination when he came into the community room. He had yet to make a decision, rather he was just obsessively touching every thing that the cart had to offer.

Like he hasn’t seen the exact one every day for a fucking year.

One of the orderlies even had to bring his meds over to it since Naruto ignored his calls to meet him by the-

Sasuke stopped.

Son of a bitch.

He knew exactly what he was doing.

The raven spun around fast and went to rush over to his deceitful blonde, but he wasn’t where he left him. In fact, he was no where in sight.

“Fuck.”

Sasuke whipped his head around, seeking him out. When he didn’t spot that mess of blonde hair he ran across the room and over towards the corridor. He must have snuck off to the bathroom.

Sasuke skidded around the corner, ignoring the orderly commanding him to come back, and nearly collided with the blonde in question. Naruto’s huge blue eyes widened even more as Sasuke came to an abrupt stop directly in front of him, his breath catching in his throat in his surprise.

Sasuke grabbed him roughly by the arms and jerked him forward, bringing him even closer. “You spat them out, didn’t you.”

Naruto looked nervous as he met his accusatory gaze, and he had his answer. But Sasuke wasn’t satisfied with that- he wanted him to say it. He wanted an explanation.

“I-”

“What?” Sasuke snarled, “Do you plan on lying to me again?”

Naruto bit his lip. “I’m sorry.”

“For spitting them out or for lying to me?”

“For lying to you.”

The grip on his arms tightened and Naruto flinched. “Sasuke-”

“I thought you said I make you happy.”

Naruto blinked, thrown off by the comment. “You do.”

“Then why did you do this? Why can’t you just be satisfied with me? Why do you need them?”

Naruto knew he meant the hallucinations. Sasuke wasn’t stupid- he knew what Naruto was doing. The only reason he would choose to skip out on his meds was to get his illusions to return. And it was clear that Sasuke wasn’t happy about it.

“You don’t understand” Naruto said quietly.

“Then fucking make me understand!”

But before he could get anything more out of him an orderly stepped in behind him. His timing sucked, but Sasuke wasn’t surprised to see him. It was the same guy who told him to come back when he headed this way in the first place. He never expected him to just sit back and ignore that.

“Come on, break it up you two. You shouldn’t be back here.”

Sasuke ignored the orderly until a hand dropped down on his wrist and gave it a firm squeeze. He glared at it, tempted to snap it in half like a fucking twig, but he forced back the urge. He didn’t want to leave Naruto alone- not when he was about to lose his fucking mind.

“Fine.”

He released the blonde, much to the orderly’s surprise, and took a step back.

“Ok.. ok, now let’s get you two back to the community room.”

Once again, Sasuke left the orderly completely stunned when he allowed himself to be led back into the main room without any resistance. Naruto did the same, but he seemed a lot more reluctant to. The man took that more as a sign that he was uncomfortable with the Uchiha instead of that he had some aversion about going back, and paused to ask him about it before leaving the two be.

“Uzumaki, would you like some time to yourself for a while?” He gave the blonde a pointed look, but Naruto just shook his head.

“No, it’s alright.”

The orderly, clearly not familiar with Naruto’s candid ways, gave him a disbelieving look but chose to leave it alone for now. “Well, let me know if you find you need some space. Ok?”

Naruto nodded and with one last look at the two the man walked off to take his post elsewhere. Sasuke watched him walk away for a moment, still tempted to bust his face in, then turned back to his newest concern.

“You haven’t answered my question.”

Naruto tilted his head slightly. “What was the question?”

Sasuke narrowed his eyes and took a step towards him. “Why am I not enough for you?”

Those huge blue eyes just stared at him, sincere and unblinking. “Sasuke, that’s not what this is.”

The raven grated his teeth together, fresh rage clenched between them. “Then what the fuck is it” he snapped.

“I just.. miss them.”

The truth. But it did little to make Sasuke’s anger dissipate. “Why the hell would you even want them back? You said you were afraid of them.”

“Some of them.”

“And you’d still let this happen.”

Naruto gave him a pained look. “Are you mad at me?”

“I would think that’d be pretty fucking obvious at this point.”

“I.. don’t want you to be mad at me.”

“And I don’t want you to torture yourself. Guess neither of us get what we want” Sasuke snarled back.

He roughly dragged his fingers through his hair and shifted his gaze to the side as dark strands slowly fell back into place.

Naruto noticed the look and his stomach twisted into a tight knot. He felt sick.

He felt desperate.

“Are you going to tell them?”

Those midnight eyes shot back to him, the fire inside now a raging inferno. “Shouldn’t I?”

Naruto swallowed. “Please, Sasuke. Just one day.”

“Yeah? And why should I, hm? Give me one reason why I should just ignore this.”

“Because.. you care about me. Don’t you?”

Sasuke’s eyes darkened. “That’s not fair.”

“But it’s true..?”

“Of course it’s fucking true” he snapped. “That doesn’t mean you should use it against me!”

“What do you want in return?”

Sasuke faltered at that. The thought of Naruto owing him one- he couldn’t deny that it was a tempting offer. “You want to exchange favors for this.”

“Favor” Naruto emphasized. “Just one.”

Sasuke had one in particular that sprang to mind first- along with a beautiful image of his blonde on all fours, his back arched and his ass primed. The request was on the tip of his tongue, but he knew he wouldn’t ask for it. He didn’t want that to be the reason why Naruto let him go all the way. He craved the chance, obviously, but he wanted Naruto to want it just as badly as he did. Coercion was not how he planned on doing that.

So, with that out of the question, another idea slipped in to take its place.

“Fine. You want me to let you do this, then I expect you to let me do it with you.”

Naruto’s brows furrowed. “What does that mean?”

“It means that you are going to tell me everything. Every illusion you see, every feeling you’re having- all of it.”

Naruto stared at him, shock and confusion flickering beneath the surface of those cool ocean blues. “Why would you want that?”

“Because I fucking do!” Sasuke snapped. “So do we have a deal or not?”

Naruto wasn’t thrilled by the prospect, but he wasn’t sure he had much of a choice. Sasuke had him in a bind, and they both knew it. If at any point he told the orderlies what he had done, they would immediately force the meds into him and ruin any chance he might have of seeing his long-lost companions. And if that happened, the orderlies would definitely step up their game and keep a much closer eye on him. It would take quite some time to find another opportunity to do this if that were the case.

“I guess I don’t really have a choice..” he muttered.

“No, you don’t.”

Naruto nodded. “Ok. I’ll do it.”

“Fine. But if things get out of hand you’re taking those fucking meds. And you’re not going to give me shit about it.”

He nodded again.

“Good.”

Sasuke grabbed his hand and tangled their fingers together, tightening his grasp, ensuring he couldn’t break away. “Now, let’s go get that water you claimed you wanted. Then we’ll go to our spot and see what happens.”

Naruto considered his words as he was dragged off to grab a bottle of water before turning to answer him. “Actually, can we sit by the window today?”

“Any particular reason?” Sasuke asked, though he had a feeling he already knew.

The corner of Naruto’s mouth lifted ever so slightly before falling back to its neutral position.

“Just hoping to see an old friend.”

As the two headed to Naruto’s requested spot, Sasuke was surprised to find that he was actually pretty fucking jealous of the man who supposedly controlled birds.

A man who didn’t exist.

“Christ” he muttered under his breath. “Maybe I really am crazy..”

Luckily, Naruto didn’t hear him.

Though Sasuke had a feeling that if he had, he wouldn’t disagree with him.

Chapter Text

“He wondered to himself if there were things worse than crucifixion. It turned out there were.

There were teeth.”

- Stephen King

--

Iruka sighed over his cup of coffee, his hazulnut stare locked onto its murky contents. He was far too exhausted to deal with the guy who suddenly seemed hellbent on pestering him. Which was pretty ironic considering how fast he had bailed on him when Iruka actually needed him to be there.

Mizuki’s sudden disappearance was the very reason Iruka had been knocked out by a patient last week. So why was he bothering him now? The guy had made it quite clear that he didn’t approve of Iruka. He had his petty little revenge when Iruka dared to be outspoken about who he was, and the bastard had gotten away with it. You would think that’d mean he’d be done with him and move on, but he hasn’t.

If anything, it was getting worse.

Iruka tried ignoring him, but the guy refused to leave. When that didn’t work, he even got to the point where he told Mizuki to go fuck off. And yet, here he was.

Again.

What the hell is it going to take for him to leave me alone?

Tired brown eyes slid over to his unwanted guest, noting the guy’s casual stance, his unending stare. Iruka shivered. There was something about that look that made him feel sick. He tried not to put too much thought towards it, ignoring the rush of warning signs flashing in his head as he shifted his eyes back to his bitter drink, resigning himself to an equally bitter morning.

Iruka let out another heavy sigh. “What do you want, Mizuki?”

He could feel those dark eyes on him still and his discomfort grew.

“Who said I wanted anything?”

“Then why don’t you go make yourself useful somewhere else.”

Mizuki ignored his request and pushed off from the wall to take a step towards him instead. Iruka noticeably stiffened, unintentionally peaking Mizuki’s interest, drawing him closer. Iruka clenched his teeth as he waited, wondering why the guy was acting so strangely all of a sudden.

What changed?

He was jerked from his musings when a hand suddenly lurched out and grabbed his jaw. Iruka breathed in a sharp inhale as his face was wrenched to the side, his eyes forced to meet those dark pools gleaming with excitement.

One hand was still preoccupied with his coffee mug, but Iruka quickly used the other to try to shove him back. Mizuki simply tightened his grip- refusing to let go.

“Nnnhn! What the hell are you doing?!”

Mizuki rubbed his thumb against the bruise on his cheek, and smirked when he winced in pain. Iruka glared at him and grabbed his wrist, fighting hard to pry it away from his face.

“Let go” he growled, anger masking most of his fear.

He didn’t like the look he saw on Mizuki’s face- it made his skin crawl. And he was suddenly desperate to get as far away from it as possible. But Mizuki wasn’t letting him go that easily. He kept a firm grip on him as he shifted closer.

Iruka’s breath snagged in his throat.

“S-stop..”

Mizuki’s grin widened, but before he could do anything else another hand grabbed his arm- and this one had a lot more power to it. Mizuki turned to tell off the person who had dared to interrupt him and found a pair of angry dark orbs glaring back.

“I suggest you let him go.”

Iruka’s eyes filled with relief as Kakashi forced Mizuki’s hand away, freeing him at last. The silver fox pushed his brunette back and stepped between them- facing off against the orderly in his place.

“I don’t want to ever see that again. Do you understand me?”

Mizuki grated his teeth together but chose not to answer. Kakashi was displeased by his lack of response and decided to give him another chance to fix it.

“I said, I don’t want to see that again” he snarled. “Got it?” 

“Yeah, I get it.”

That wandering gaze made its way back to the brunette behind him, which only pissed Kakashi off more. He scooted to the side, blocking the guy’s view, ensuring he got a good look at him instead and the rage he didn’t bother hiding.

“Stay away from Iruka” Kakashi growled. “That’s an order.”

Mizuki finally met his eyes, his own brimming with suspicion and fury.

“What’s it to you if I don’t?”

“It’s my problem” Kakashi shot back. “And I have a feeling you won’t like how I solve it.”

Mizuki eyed the two a moment longer before finally giving in and retreating. But the anger he felt, the inexplainable jealousy, that remained. And it didn’t look like it was going anywhere anytime soon.

I’m not done with you yet, Iruka.

His mouth curled into a venomous, inhuman smile.

Not by a long shot.

--

Kakashi stared after the orderly as he walked away, pondering over the look he had seen on his face. It didn’t bode well with him. Especially knowing that Iruka had been on the receiving end of it.

Speaking of which..

Kakashi turned around and placed a hand on his shoulder. “Iruka? Are you ok?”

The brunette nodded, but he kept his head down, his expression obscured by loose strands of hair. Kakashi reached out and slid a finger under his chin. He slowly raised it up, seeking out those beautiful brown eyes.

“Are you ok?” he repeated, knowing he’d be able to see the truth in them.

Iruka didn’t answer, didn’t even hint at one, which he supposed was answer enough. Kakashi studied his face, noting how pale he was. He watched his teeth find his bottom lip, worrying at it without abandon.

“I’m just.. confused” he finally murmured.

Kakashi considered him a moment longer before responding. “Is that the orderly who was supposed to step in and help you when Sabaku and Uchiha were fighting?”

Iruka nodded.

Kakashi’s jaw clenched, a vein snapping to the surface with his sudden anger. “It was on purpose.”

He wasn’t asking. He had seen cruelty in those eyes. And something else. He thought about the way he grabbed Iruka, how he saw him closing in on him, smiling when he tried to push him away.

“Has he always been like that with you?” Kakashi asked. He let his hand fall back to his side, not wanting to make his brunette feel trapped all over again.

Iruka shook his head. “No. Mizuki is.. he’s homophobic. I thought he left because he wanted to see me get hurt, but this…”

Iruka let his voice fade out, not exactly sure what else to say. It was crazy- they were talking about someone who openly hated gay people. How could he think that the same guy was suddenly attracted to him?

But that look in his eyes..

Iruka shivered.

“I want you to stay away from him” Kakashi growled. “I’ll change his schedule right now. And I’m writing him up for sexual harassment.”

“Kakashi, it’s.. there’s no way it’s what you think it is. I told you, he hates-”

“Yeah, I heard what you said” he cut in. “But I know what I saw.” He eyed his brunette closely then added, “and you do too.”

Iruka’s mouth snapped shut.

“If he tries anything, I want you to tell me right away.”

He nodded but continued to stay quiet.

“And Iruka?”

He glanced up.

“Stay close to me. I’ll keep you safe.”

Iruka gave him an almost pained look, tears floating to the surface. Kakashi smoothed back his loose strands of hair, his touch lingering as their eyes held tight, refusing to let go.

“I mean it, Iruka.”

“I know” he whispered. “I’ll stay close.”

Kakashi looked past him, found Mizuki, then dropped his focus back to his brunette. “Good. Then come with me.”

“To..?”

“My office.”

Iruka gave him a confused look. “Why?”

“Because I can’t kiss you here.”

--

“Wow. Some friend you are.”

Naruto flinched and spun around in his chair, seeking out the source. A face, monochromatic and surrounded by something like a thick leafy maw, was slowly pushing its way through the wall. His mouth was set in a deep frown, golden eyes brimming with blatant disappointment. Naruto stared at him, his alarm growing as the illusion stretched out past the restraints of the drywall, clearly dead set on reaching him.

“What do you mean?” Naruto finally forced himself to say.

The figure, equal parts human and plant, black and white, fixed him with a sharp look. “Haven’t you noticed Kiba’s face?”

Naruto was surprised to hear that name and for a second he couldn’t place it. Then he realized that the man wasn’t talking about another illusion- he was talking about a patient. The brunette who had been somewhat of a friend to him. That is until Sasuke came along and pretty much took his place.

“What’s wrong with Kiba’s face..?”

Sasuke, annoyed that Naruto was already failing to hold up his end of the deal, grabbed the blonde and spun him back to face him. “Who are you talking to?”

Naruto was nervous to answer him, but he did. He told him all of it. His stomach sank into a deep consuming pit when he saw the shock in those dark eyes.

“Who’s Kiba?”

Naruto blinked. That’s the part he’s confused by..?

“Oh, he’s another patient. Mmm..”

Naruto glanced around the room until he finally spotted him.

He pointed. “There.”

His hand slowly fell as he finally noticed what the hallucination had been talking about. There was a bruise on Kiba’s cheek- large enough for him to see even from where he was sitting. An angry mark the color of a darkening sky.

“What happened to him..?”

“Do you want to ask him?”

Naruto glanced back at the raven. “Should I?”

“I don’t know” Sasuke snapped, what was left of his patience dwindling. “Why don’t you ask your friend?”

Naruto flinched back from the cruelty in his voice, and Sasuke immediately regretted it.

“This is why I didn’t want you to know.”

The raven sighed. “I’m sorry, alright. I didn’t mean anything by that. If you want to ask Kiba what happened, then ask. And if you want me to go with you, I will.”

He paused, but couldn’t stop himself from adding, “and tell your plant friend to hang back. You don’t need his help for this.”

“You sound jealous.”

“Yeah, well, maybe I am.”

Naruto blinked. “Sasuke, he isn’t real.”

“He is to you.”

Naruto couldn’t exactly refute that, so he let the subject drop. He rose to his feet and ignored the man in the wall in favor of the one standing before him. Sasuke held out his hand, but Naruto didn’t take it at first. Which bothered him immensely.

“Naruto-” he growled between clenched teeth.

“Do you think we should wait on that?” Naruto asked.

Sasuke looked down at his empty hand, then narrowed his eyes on his uncertain blonde.

“You have a problem holding my hand?”

“No! I just think that.. maybe we shouldn’t rub it in Kiba’s face.”

“Right.”

“Sasuke..”

“No, it’s fine. It’s great actually. Just pretend I’m not here.”

“Jesus Christ.”

The raven raised a brow as his blonde not only uttered an angry retort like he would have, but also grabbed his hand and jerked it over to him in matching fashion.

“Well, this is surprising.”

“Because..?”

Sasuke grinned. “Because you sound like me.”

“Is that a problem?”

“Not at all” Sasuke’s mischievous smile widened. “I like being a bad influence on you.”

“Whatever. Let’s just go.”

Sasuke was thoroughly amused as the blonde pulled him away from the window and over to his dejected friend, but he forced the smile down and kept his face impassive as they closed the distance. Kiba looked up when they were only a few feet away and his eyes widened at the sight of them. He stared at their clasped hands for a moment before turning to Naruto, though his eyes flickered back to Sasuke several times as he waited for them to speak.

Naruto swallowed as he scoured his mind for the right words. In the end, he decided to just throw it out there. It didn’t help any of them to pretend he hadn’t noticed.

“Kiba.. are you ok? What happened to you?”

The brunette brought his hand up to cover his cheek, though it was pointless to do so now. “Oh, this. Yeah.. I guess it’s hard not to notice, right?”

“Doesn’t really answer his question.”

Naruto jabbed his elbow into Sasuke’s side, another surprisingly Uchiha-like thing for him to do.

“It’s just.. I was away for a while” Naruto interjected. “You know, after..” A image of the redhead came to mind but he quickly shook it from head. That wasn’t what was important here. “Kiba, who was it? Who hurt you?”  

“It doesn’t matter.”

“Of course it matters!”

Naruto’s head shot to the side, acknowledging a presence only he could see, before turning back to the mulish brunette. Sasuke gave him a curious look but didn’t comment on it as he readjusted his focus on the issue at hand. 

“I don’t want anyone to hurt you” Naruto said quietly. 

“Why?” Kiba asked, genuinely curious.

“Well, because you’re my friend.”

Kiba tilted his head to the side, his curious eyes on the blonde’s sincere face. “Am I?”

“I think so.”

The two looked at each other, both clearly uncertain. Sasuke rolled his eyes.

“You don’t have to have slumber parties and fucking braid each other’s hair to be friends, you know. Naruto gives a shit about you- isn’t that proof enough?”

Kiba tilted his head the opposite way, considering the blonde further as the raven spoke. “I suppose that’s true.”

“Great. Now, how about you tell us who’s responsible for this. And before you say anything else- you’ve got nothing to worry about” Sasuke said. “I’ll make sure the bastard never does it again.”

“I don’t want you to hurt him.”

Sasuke’s eyes darkened. “Don’t piss me off” he growled.

“Kiba, Sasuke’s just trying to help.”

“I don’t need his help” Kiba said matter of factly. 

“Oh, yeah, looks like you’ve got this all figured out” Sasuke spat, not bothering to sugarcoat his sarcasm. “The guy fucking decked you. At the very least he should have someone punch him back for it.”

Kiba thought that over before meeting those angry dark eyes, his expression unreadable. “You think so?”

“Yeah. I fucking do.”

“Hmm..”

Naruto and Sasuke watched as his gaze slipped away from them. It locked onto something to the far side of the room for a moment before finding its way back. But when he finally looked at them again, they noticed there was something different about him.

Something had changed.

“You know what” Kiba muttered, “I think you’re right.”

The brunette reached over to his art set, took his paintbrush, and lightly dipped it in red. He used the brush to paint something on his cheek, obscuring some of the bruise beneath it.

“Tribal paint” Kiba explained, as he darkened the triangular mark on his face. “And these- these are the markings of a warrior.”

Kiba painted the other side of his face, inexplicably creating the exact same mark in the exact same spot with absolute precision.

“And do you know what my people have discovered?”

The two saw something flash in those cinnamon eyes, a beastly look. Naruto’s mouth went dry, his adrenaline spiking at the mere sight of it- a biological response to a dangerous predator in their midst.

“What.. did they discover..” he said quietly, though he wasn’t sure he should ask.

Kiba smiled, a dark humorless thing that made Naruto’s throat constrict.

“That our spirits are connected to our ancestors” Kiba answered. “Our true ancestors.”

His grin pulled taut across his painted face, eyes gleaming with malice as he uttered one final word.

“Wolves.”

Sasuke’s eyes widened as Kiba’s mouth suddenly stretched wide. He watched him bare his unusually sharp canines, saw his eyes flicker with a deep resonanting rage, and felt his feet unconsciously shift back.

What the hell..?

Kiba’s head ticked to the side, sudden enough to make his neck crack. His arms did the same, their movements sharp and jarring- like a broken doll roughly reconfigured by rushed senseless hands.

Sasuke took another step back, pulling his dazed blonde with him. They watched in awe and horror as Kiba dropped down onto his hands, the tips of his toes digging against the floor, bracing himself. A feral cry savagely ripped from his throat, their only warning before he sprang into action.

“Kiba, wait!”

Naruto tried to reach for him, but it was too late. His friend moved impossibly fast on all fours, dodging legs- human and furniture alike- as he closed in on his target. Naruto pulled his gaze away from his beastly form and immediately knew who he was after.

The redhead- the guy who had taken his journal and taunted him with it. The one who had pinned him down when Naruto attacked him, who Sasuke tackled and punched across the face, had just walked into the room. And he didn’t see Kiba coming.

Not until it was too late.

Kiba leapt up onto the couch between them and launched himself off of it, another inhuman cry spilling from his throat. Gaara had just enough time to feel surprised before the feral brunette slammed into him. He fell back against the floor, his elbows crashing into the linoleum, shooting pain up his arms.

It distracted him a moment too long.

Gaara looked up and saw Kiba tilt his head. Then, with a deep guttural growl, he buried his teeth into the side of his neck.

Gaara cried out and tried to shove him off of him, but Kiba just bore down harder.

Kiba could feel the skin break, could taste the sharp tang of metal as blood filled his mouth, coating his tongue and staining his teeth. He jerked his head to the side, tearing deeper into his throat. and Gaara screamed.

Several orderlies tried to pull him off, but they couldn’t pry his mouth away without making things worse. They moved fast to fill a syringe and shoved it into the brunette’s neck as they continued to fight to force him away from the bloodied redhead beneath him. When it did finally work, the sedative hit him hard. Kiba’s jaw slackened, and they were finally able to pull him away.

Gaara brought his hand up fast and slammed it down on his neck, doing his best to staunch off the bleeding. He could feel the hot sticky mess all over his palm, running between his fingers and down the collar of his shirt. Gaara choked back the pain, the fear, as he sought out someone to help him. He opened his mouth, prepared to set aside his pride and beg if he had to, but the orderlies moved before he uttered a single sound. A towel was pressed firmly against his neck, his hands were pulled away, and he could feel fingers on his arms, searching for a vein.

“I…”

Gaara’s fading eyes shot around the room before finally landing on the blonde. He hadn’t seen him approach, but there he was- hand in hand with that same raven-haired fiend he had with him before.

Gaara locked onto the two and opened his mouth, forcing the words to the surface even as his mind slipped further away.

“I-”

Gaara took a shaky breath, and the tears finally began to fall.

“hurt him..

first...”

And then he was out.

Chapter Text

“I’m right where I should be.”

-Adventure Time

--

Sasuke dragged a hand through his hair before letting it fall limply to his side. “Holy shit” he breathed. “That was.. something.”

“You know, I’m not even sure that Kiba’s Native American.”

Sasuke gave him an incredulous look. “After everything that just happened that’s what you find odd about this.”

“I never said it was the only thing.”

Sasuke shook his head. “You are something else.” Then a thought occurred to him. “You’ve been here for like a year, right?”

Naruto nodded.

“So, have you seen Kiba do that before?”

“I mean, I’ve seen the wolf transformation thing that he does, but most of it was during a full moon. Wait- is it a full moon?”

Sasuke pinched the bridge of his nose. “It’s the middle of the day, Naruto.”

“Hmm. Well, then that’s definitely surprising.”

“And the ‘pretending to turn into a wolf’ thing- that didn’t strike you as odd?”

“We live in an insane asylum” Naruto pointed out. “We’re all odd.”

“Plant guy isn’t looking too bad right about now..” Sasuke muttered under his breath.

Naruto tilted his head and looked up at him with those wide blue eyes, far too naïve for his own good. “Does that mean you want to go hangout with him again? He’s still by the window if you-”

“Absolutely not.”

“Hmph” Naruto grumbled, his lips pouty. Sasuke stared at his mouth with the utmost focus and Naruto quickly pressed his lips together, hiding the temptation. “Fine” he muttered, “but I want to talk to that one.”

He gestured to an empty corner of the room- to a being only he could see.

“Ah, yes, that’s very helpful Naruto. Now I understand perfectly.”

The blonde rolled his eyes, another very Uchiha-like thing to do.

Sasuke grinned. “I like seeing you act like me.”

Naruto’s lips lifted slightly, a trace of his own cocky smile. “Can’t wait to see you do the same.”

“I’m not sure this place could handle two of you, Naruto.”

The comment earned him another jab to the ribs, but Sasuke didn’t seem to be the least bit bothered by it.

Naruto narrowed his eyes at the far too amused raven beside him. “Shut up…

Teme.”

--

Kakashi gripped Iruka’s hips and jerked him forward, pulling his ass off the edge of his desk as he buried his cock between his legs.

“Mmnhghn.. fuck.”

His eyes rolled as Iruka’s hole clenched tight around his length. His tip pulsed with need, already craving a release that he was trying very hard not to give into. Kakashi dropped his forehead against the brunette’s, a long exhale cooling his brow.

“Baby, I need you to breathe. You’re so.. nnhgn.. fucking tight. You’re going to make me cum.”

Iruka trembled, his eyes wide as he stared up at him. “I- I’m trying..” he choked. “It’s so big, ‘Kashi..”

“Shhh, just breathe.”

Kakashi pulled back to get a better look at his face, but kept his want fully sheathed inside, unwilling to part with him now.

“Breathe for me, baby.”

Kakashi took in a deep breath and watched Iruka echo it. He exhaled, a long slow exhale, and Iruka did the same.

“Good. That’s right. Again. In-”

He breathed deep and pulled his hips back a little.

“And out.”

And as Iruka exhaled, Kakashi slowly pushed himself back inside. Iruka gasped but Kakashi insisted he keep going, breathing slowly for him- in and out, in and out, as he pulsed his hips, matching Iruka’s agonizingly slow pace.

“God, you feel s-so good” he moaned, his voice trembling with the effort it took to keep himself in control.

Iruka couldn’t speak. He could barely manage to breathe. But every time he stopped Kakashi pushed him to keep going, just like he showed him. He could feel strong fingers dig into his hips as Kakashi gradually started to move faster. Iruka gripped him hard, his legs trembling violently as Kakashi thrust into him over and over and over..

His eyes rolled and passion soon replaced pain. Iruka wrapped his legs tighter around Kakashi’s hips and lifted himself up to meet each thrust, impaling himself even deeper. Kakashi groaned and rolled his hips, stretching out his hole more, and then he stopped holding back. He shoved his little brunette flat on his back, jerked his hips close, then fucked him hard- ramming his cock into him with all the force of his relentless desire.

Iruka screamed and Kakashi quickly slammed his hand over his mouth, stifling his passionate cries as he fucked him harder. Iruka dug his nails into the desk, holding on for dear life as Kakashi drilled him into it. He closed his eyes tight, overcome by the feel of him, until he couldn’t hold out any longer. Iruka moved his hand between them and grabbed his own length, pumping in time to match Kakashi’s pace, but Kakashi quickly shoved his hand to the side and grabbed his cock for him. Iruka shuddered at the jarring intimacy of it, the new sensation that rolled in his core as Kakashi’s hand moved up and down faster and faster..

“Mmmnphh!” Iruka screamed behind Kakashi’s hand as his climax abruptly shot through him, thick cum spraying across his stomach. Kakashi went to pull out of him to do the same, but Iruka just tightened his legs around him and forced him deeper.

Kakashi’s hand fell from his lips in time to hear Iruka breathe the sexiest thing he’s ever said to him.

“I want you to cum inside of me.”

“Oh my fucking- mmnhn..”

Kakashi’s hips went still and a sudden warmth flooded through his little brunette, saturating that place that belonged to him and him alone. Kakashi leaned forward, his cock still buried deep inside, and captured Iruka’s lips. He slipped his tongue between them, and fresh desire flared in his core. The taste of him, filling both his enticing holes at once..

It was enough to drive a man to madness.

Iruka pulled back with a shaky breath and gave the silver fox an incredulous look. “You have got to be kidding me.”

Kakashi gave his uke his most charming smile as he lightly pulsed his hips. “Just one more time.”

“Kakashi!”

“Are you really going to pretend you don’t want it?” he said, a mischievous smirk pulling at his chiseled face.

Iruka gave his boss a pouty look, though it was far from convincing. “Maybe..”

“I’ll be gentle?” Kakashi tried.

Iruka rolled his eyes. “No, you won’t.”

“Ok, I won’t. But I’ll make sure you like it.”

Iruka sighed. “Fine. But after that you should probably let me go do my job.”

“And eventually I will.”

Kakashi stared at his perfect uke, desire slamming into him with every flinch, every pained gasp that fell from Iruka’s kiss-swollen lips.

He smiled.

“Just not yet.”

--

Kakashi received the news of what happened in the community room later than he probably should have, but in his defense he was a bit.. preoccupied.

Luckily he had the foresight to tell his secretary that he had an important meeting and should not be interrupted under any circumstance. Arguably, this was probably one occasion that she should have made an exception for, but it was a little late to point that out now. Plus it meant he wouldn’t have to try to figure out how to explain away their violent and highly inappropriate lovemaking. Was it unprofessional? Yes. Was he going to lose any sleep over it?

Probably not.

After their second round of passion, Iruka was quick to shut down a third and the two made their way into Kakashi’s private bathroom to wash off the remnants. They adjusted their wrinkled clothes, smoothed back disheveled hair, and then unexpectedly walked out into absolute chaos.

“Kakashi! Fuck, thank god!” The frantic orderly paled, instantly horrified. “Shit. I mean, sorry, I’m sorry sir, it’s just- it’s been insane.”

“That doesn’t surprise me” Kakashi replied, a hint of a smile on his lips. “Why don’t you just tell me what’s going on.”

It didn’t take long for the news to tumble out of the orderly’s mouth, and when it did all humor dissipated. Kakashi immediately went into boss mode and Iruka quickly ran off to tend to what he could.

He raced through the halls and came to an abrupt stop at the end of the corridor- his eyes darting around the main room, taking account of all of the patients and their present conditions. The staff seemed to have managed their panic well, by the looks of it. The blood had already been scrubbed away, furniture put right-side up, and the few that weren’t handling it as well as the rest had a team of people talking them through it.

Iruka considered his next move for a moment before finally making a decision. He would usually have to get permission for what he had in mind, but he didn’t want to wait that long. Besides, Kakashi would likely say yes- so why bother with semantics?

Iruka knew Kiba’s case well and he was sure that he could make himself useful. Kiba was usually one of the patients on his morning rounds and Iruka had gotten to know him a bit because of it. And, on multiple occasions, Iruka had been able to calm him down when this wolf-like persona of his came through.

Granted, he’s never seen Kiba this out of control before. But he wasn’t going into it with the misconception that this would be an easy feat. Iruka was well aware that the likelihood of facing a feral patient and leaving unscathed was pretty low, but he was still willing to try. And he had a feeling that not every orderly could say the same. He couldn’t exactly blame them for being hesitant, though.

Not everyone was willing to get bit twice.

Iruka rubbed at his wrist, tracing the scar Kiba had left last time.

It’s fine, he told himself. He’s probably already sedated and restrained.

At the very least, he’s probably back to himself again. And if that’s the case, you have nothing to worry about.

When Kiba wasn’t embracing his inner wolf, he was a kind and rather sensible person. There were many times when Iruka had seen him talking other patients through their problems, counseling them better than half the orderlies who worked here. Watch the kid long enough, and it was easy to forget why he was in here in the first place.

Kiba usually had such a calm demeanor. He was composed, thoughtful- he understood people. He looked past their walls, through the anger and pain- he saw what was really there. Patients were drawn to him, and very rarely was that a problem. He’d howl at a full moon, snarl when someone pestered a helpless patient, but nothing like this. Iruka wasn’t sure what was different this time, why he went after Gaara so savagely, but he fully intended on finding out.

For both of their sakes.

Iruka quietly padded his way down the hall, avoiding conversation with the other orderlies along the way. This time he wasn’t looking for any help. In fact, he’d prefer to handle this patient alone.

He rounded a corner and continued walking until he was about halfway down the corridor. He paused before a door, took a deep breath, then slid back the small panel to take a look. Kiba had been restrained to his cot, which wasn’t surprising. What did surprise him though was that the sedatives had failed to knock him out.

Must be the adrenaline rush, Iruka thought. They didn’t give him enough to account for it.

He mentally took note of that, storing it away for future reference.

Maybe he’s built up a bit of a tolerance to the meds, he thought further.

Or maybe he’s always had one.. and we just never noticed before.

Whatever the case, even with Kiba awake he clearly wouldn’t be putting himself in danger by joining him. Iruka gently slid the panel back into place, then unlocked the door and stepped inside. He made sure to close the door as quietly as possible, then turned to face his semi-conscious patient.

“Hi Kiba.”

After a brief pause Kiba slowly let his head fall to the side to meet his gaze. Disheveled walnut-colored hair spilled lightly across his face but managed to stay clear of his eyes. Those cinnamon depths peered through, brimming with curiosity. His brows furrowed over them as Iruka approached, clearly not sure if he should trust it.

It saddened Iruka to know that he didn’t.

“Why.. are you… here?” Kiba murmured, his voice heavy, faded- like lost words scrawled across aged parchment.

Iruka gave him a small smile, hoping to ease any discomfort his presence might give him. “I just wanted to check on you” he answered softly, “make sure you’re ok.”

Kiba gave him a pained look before sliding his eyes away from him. “I’m.. not the one that… you should be.. checking on.”

Iruka pulled a chair over to the cot and took a seat, settling in beside his despondent patient. “I heard what happened” he admitted. “Want to tell me about it?”

Kiba swallowed. “I hurt him…”

“He said he hurt you first.”

Kiba looked up. “I thought.. it was right” he forced out, fighting the drugs incessantly rushing through him. “But now.. now I’m not so.. sure.”

Iruka paused, searching for the right words. He knew he’d have to proceed with caution if he was going to get any answers from him and avoid setting him off again. “What made you think it was right to begin with?”

“An eye… for an eye.”

Iruka gave the brunette a sad look. “Then why does it seem like you regret it?”

Kiba’s eyes faded, the light inside steadily growing dim, but not enough to hide the guilt flickering inside.

“Because I do” he said quietly.

“So then tell me” Iruka pressed, “how would you like to make it right?”

Kiba thought on that for a moment before responding. When he finally did his voice was just as weak but there was a resolution to his words, as if his mind was made up and utterly incapable of changing.

“I need to.. see him.”

Iruka sighed. “Kiba-”

“Please. I need to.. make it… right.”

Iruka could see that he was sincere, but after such a vicious attack the likelihood of that happening was pretty slim. Protocol called for those two to stay separated for a while before allowing any sort of interaction. And even then, it would have to be closely monitored. Iruka just couldn’t imagine that anyone would make an exception for Kiba now, no matter how guilty he felt.

“I’m sorry, Kiba, but I don’t think that will be allowed for quite some time.”

“Can I talk to.. Dr. Kakashi..? I just.. want a chance to… to…”

His eyes rolled and for a second Iruka thought he’d passed out. But Kiba managed to force it back somehow.

“We were.. supposed to… just be even” he choked. “But I.. took it too far.”

Now there’s an understatement, Iruka thought dryly- though he kept the comment to himself. It wouldn’t pay to rub it in. Kiba clearly regretted his actions and was determined to fix it. Iruka saw no reason to make him feel any worse than he already did.

“I’ll see what I can do” he replied. “But Kiba- I can’t make any promises.”

“I know.”

The light in Kiba’s eyes went out again and this time he closed them, resigning himself to it.

“Thank.. you” he breathed.

Then he fell limply against his restraints, completely unconscious.

Iruka studied the brunette a moment longer before rising to his feet. He put the chair back where he found it and stepped across the room. Before he left, Iruka gave his patient one final look, wondering over his words. He hadn’t expected to already find him this calm. Usually getting Kiba back to this state took far more effort on everyone’s part. And yet this time he had managed to find himself again on his own, and it seemed to happen faster than it ever had before.

I wonder why that is.

Iruka didn’t have to ponder that for long. The answer occurred to him pretty quickly once he thought about what was different this time.

Gaara Sabaku.

Looks like he’s managed to get under Kiba’s skin.

Iruka smiled.

Good.

It’s about time someone did.

--

“I still can’t believe you agreed to this.”

Kakashi quirked a brow at his boyfriend. “Isn’t this what you wanted?”

“It’s what I asked for” Iruka corrected, “but I didn’t really expect you to say yes.”

Kakashi gave his boyfriend his most dazzling smile and watched him swoon beneath it. It took everything in him not to shove him down on his desk again.

“I’m full of surprises, darling. I’d have thought you’d know that by now.”

Iruka blushed. “I.. yes, I can see that. I just assumed.. ahem, nevermind.”

“Assumed what, my little Iru, hmm? That I was only unpredictable with you?”

“I didn’t say that.”

Kakashi rose to his feet and slowly sauntered across the room, his smile widening as Iruka stared back at him nervously.

“Kashi, they’re going to be here any minute..”

“Have you forgotten?”

Kakashi closed the distance between them and placed his hand against the wall, trapping Iruka against it. Those hazelnut eyes blinked up at him and he could hear his breath catch in his throat. Kakashi leaned in, bringing his lips against his ear, and watched out of the corner of his eye as Iruka shivered against him.

He smiled. “I can do a lot of things in a couple minutes.”

“Kashi-”

A light tap on the door made him practically jump out of his skin. Iruka shoved his boyfriend back fast, eyes wide with panic.

“Sir?” a voice called out from the hall, “the patients you wanted to see are here now.”

Kakashi sighed. So much for a few minutes.

He eyed his anxious brunette.

Actually..

“Give me a minute, Shizune.”

Iruka threw his hand out, his head already shaking before Kakashi could take another step. “Don’t even think about it” he whispered.

“Fine. I won’t.”

Then Kakashi grabbed hold of his wrist and yanked it towards him. Iruka yelped in surprise as he fell right into his boss’ arms. He managed to regain his footing, but he wasn’t fast enough to break free. Kakashi wrapped a powerful hand behind his neck and silenced him with an equally forceful embrace.

“Mnnhn!”

Kakashi snaked an arm around his waist and held him close, his body pulsing with desire. And despite Iruka’s attempt at resistance, he found himself melting against him. He buried his hand in hair the color of starlight and tilted his head to deepen their kiss, resigning himself to the man he couldn’t possibly refuse.

After their minute of passion was up, Kakashi reluctantly pulled back and stared lovingly into Iruka’s face. He wished he could do more, a lot more, but he also knew that now wasn’t the time for that.

“Let’s pick this up again tonight” he murmured, “my place.”

“What makes you think I’ll just agree everytime?” Iruka muttered.

“Because so far you have.”

“That-! That’s besides the point.”

Kakashi grinned and kissed his uke’s cheek before turning back to his desk. “You may want to sit down, Iru-darling. It might be awkward for you if our patients see that.”

Iruka’s face reddened and his hands quickly covered his rather pronounced erection.

“And who’s fault is that in the first place” he grumbled as he moved over to a chair in the corner of the office.

“Mine, of course. Who’s else would it be?”

Iruka stuck out his tongue and the humor in those eyes shifted to something entirely different.

“Don’t tempt me, Iru. I have a lot of things I want to do with your mouth.”

Iruka quickly pulled his tongue back inside. “God, Kakashi- will you just calm down already?”

“I’m trying” he argued, “but you’re making it extremely difficult.”

“Fine. I’m sorry. Just- stop looking at me.”

“You know that’s impossible.”

Iruka rolled his eyes. “Shizune, you can let them in now!”

“You can’t tell my secretary what to do.”

Iruka grinned. “And yet..”

He waved his hands dramatically as the door opened before dropping them back to his lap to hide his fading.. problem. Several orderlies stepped inside, their hands tightly wrapped around the arms of two highly unpredictable yet equally disheartened patients.

Kakashi gestured to the chairs he had already placed before his desk and his staff led them to it. He had situated each chair so that his patients would be sitting across from each other at a slight angle, ensuring that they would be able to look back at him as needed while spending a majority of their shared visit looking at each other. There was definitely a chance that chaos would erupt once they faced each other like this, but it was a risk he would have to take.

This was a chance for them to make amends, after all. One that they had both requested through Iruka. How could Kakashi possibly deny such a request?

Besides, it’s been a few days. Maybe whatever hostility they felt before was out of their system now. It was definitely possible, though just as likely that he’d have to pull the two apart. But Iruka knew those risks just as well as he did, and he had still asked despite them.

Kakashi was willing to go out on a limb if Iruka was already out there waiting for him on it. And he was pretty sure Iruka had figured that out by now.

The patients were shoved down onto their chairs before the orderlies finally released them. When they did they all turned to Kakashi, ready to receive further orders.

“You are free to go” Kakashi instructed.

The men looked at each other, their shock palpable. “Umm.. sir? Is that really such a good idea?”

Kakashi raised a brow. “Are you saying that I’m wrong?”

Asuma raised a hand in defense. “Not at all, sir. That’s not what I meant.”

“Good. Then I’ll say it again- you are all free to leave.”

The orderlies still seemed hesitant to do so, but all of them knew better than to refuse Kakashi’s orders twice. The team filed out without a word and closed the door behind them with a resounding click. Of course, they couldn’t help but notice that Iruka had stayed behind when the rest of them couldn’t, but they wouldn’t speak of it yet. At least, not this close to Kakashi’s office. If they were going to gossip about the two, they weren’t stupid enough to do it within earshot. Their many theories could wait a bit longer.

A hush fell among the team as they stepped away from Kakashi’s office and moved down the hall. One that had also made its way deep inside of Kakashi’s office. A deafening silence that settled between them, and stressed Iruka out to no end. He worried at his bottom lip, wondering if it would have been better if he had left with the others. There was no way they hadn’t noticed that he stayed, and he was sure they were all wondering why.

So much for not drawing attention to ourselves..

But it was a little late to act on that now. Besides, it wasn’t like he could just leave Kakashi alone with these two. The man was highly capable but it wouldn’t take much for things to fall apart in here. So, he stayed. And, like his patients, he waited for Kakashi to start.

“Don’t make me regret doing that” Kakashi said, gesturing to the door the majority of his staff had just walked out of. “I’d hate to have to tell them that they were right.”

Neither patient looked at him. In fact, they weren’t looking at anything apart from their own clasped hands. Kakashi sighed.

“Kiba. Gaara. You’re here to reconcile. That is what you wanted, isn’t it?”

Kiba’s head shot up fast, but Gaara spoke first. “Yes” he said firmly. “I want to reconcile.”

Kiba turned his surprised stare to the redhead across from him. “But I’m the one who hurt you” he pointed out.

Gaara finally looked up, and the haunted look in his eyes only made Kiba feel more confused. “I hurt you first” he said resolutely.

Kiba shook his head. “Not like this.”

“Kiba-”

“No. I know what I did, Gaara. Don’t lie for me.”

“I’m not lying!” Gaara shot back. “What made you want to attack me in the first place, huh? Just because you felt like it? No. You were getting back at me for what I did to you.”

“You were just trying to push me away” Kiba insisted, though it was a flimsy argument and they both knew it.

“I didn’t push you, I fucking punched you!”

“Because I was getting too close.”

“I was the one who wouldn’t back off, Kiba. You never went near me!”

“That’s not what I mean, and you know it” Kiba shot back, meeting each of Gaara’s quick comebacks with one of his own.

Kakashi’s dark eyes flitted back and forth between the two, watching the exchange with the uninterrupted focus of a tennis enthusiast. When the two finally paused to catch their breath and reset for the next match, he decided to step in.

“Gaara, did you hurt Kiba with the intention of scaring him off?”

The redhead grated his teeth, his eyes sharp as they shot towards him. “That’s no excuse.”

“Hmm..” Kakashi folded his hands under his chin and leaned forward. “So you don’t want an excuse for your actions, but you’d like to give one for Kiba’s?”

Kakashi watched Gaara clench his fists, but the redhead managed to keep his anger under control. For the time being, at least. Kakashi could see Iruka tense when he noticed the same thing, but one look from him seemed to settle his nerves.

“That’s not what this is” Gaara finally said.

Kakashi tilted his head slightly, his focus unrelenting as he studied his patient once more. “Is that so.. then what is it?”

“I deserved it!” Gaara shouted back. “He doesn’t!”

“And why do you feel like you deserve it?”

“This is stupid.”

Gaara stood up and Iruka shot to his feet with him.

“Sit down, Sabaku.”

“Fuck you!”

“Gaara!” Kakashi stood up fast, his own temper flaring. “You will not talk to him like that. Iruka is the one who organized this get together in the first place. You owe him your gratitude.”

The anger in Gaara’s eyes seemed to soften at that. He turned to look closer at the orderly. “Why..?”

“Because both of you asked me to” Iruka answered gently. “And I can see that you two need to talk this out.”

Gaara gave him another curious look before finally finding his seat once more. He looked over at the brunette he hurt and watched those sad eyes slowly lift to meet his. “Kiba.. why did you want to see me again?”

“Because my people were wrong” he murmured.

“Your people?”

Kiba bit his lip and for some reason the gesture worried Gaara. He couldn’t help but remember those inexplicably sharp canines sink into his neck, tearing at his throat. He didn’t want to see Kiba hurt himself.

Gaara shifted forward, his hand raised, intending on stopping him, but another grabbed his wrist halting him instead. Gaara gave a displeased look to the orderly who turned out to be a hell of a lot faster than he looks.

“Don’t push your luck” Iruka said firmly. “Hands to yourself.”

Gaara glared at him but let his hand fall back all the same. “Fine. Then tell him not to bite his lip like that.”

Kiba blinked. “What?”

Gaara shifted his focus back to him. “I said, don’t bite your fucking lip like that.”

“Why?”

“Because I don’t want you to hurt yourself!”

Iruka looked between the two then over to Kakashi to find that he seemed just as surprised by the redhead’s concern as he was.

“You seem to care a great deal for him” Kakashi said slowly, taking a seat before his patients once more.

Gaara ignored the comment, his focus wholly on his brunette. “Why did you say your people are wrong?” he asked, refusing to let the comment fall between the cracks.

Kiba met his gaze as he finally answered him. “An eye for an eye. I thought I was doing the right thing, but... I wasn’t.” Kiba gave him a heavy look- one that bothered Gaara immensely. He had no desire to see him look so sad, so.. lost.

“I never should have attacked you, Gaara.”

“Your people weren’t wrong.”

“Gaara-”

“No, shut up. Don’t let pity come between you and your beliefs. I hurt you first, and you hurt me back. We’re even.”

Kiba gave an incredulous laugh but there was no humor in it. No teasing in his voice or spark in his eyes- only that same flash of pain that’s been there ever since the orderlies dragged him away, when the meds finally hit along with the reality of what he had done.

Gaara wouldn’t change his mind about this- none of them would.

“Even..” he repeated. “Gaara, I tried to tear your throat out.”

“I deserved it.”

Kiba grimaced at that. “You’re only saying that because you expect people to hate you.”

“Maybe they have good reason to.”

“You give them reasons to, Gaara. The same as you tried to give me one. And I did exactly what you thought I would, what they all do, didn’t I.” Kiba shook his head. “All I did was prove you right..”

“Because I am right!”

Gaara shot to his feet again, but Iruka pushed him back down onto his chair. He had expected another reaction and knew better than to leave his side now. In fact, he wasn’t going anywhere until all of this was over.

Gaara shook off his hand, but Iruka stayed close- a fact he would just have to accept for now.

“Alright, I get it.” Gaara growled at him. He looked back over at the stubborn brunette. “Kiba, stop. Just.. stop. I don’t want your pity or your fucking apologies or whatever else you planned on doing. And you know what? I’m glad you did it.”

Kiba dropped back in his chair, another incredulous sound falling without any semblance of amusement behind it. “And I’m supposed to believe that?”

“Yes” Gaara grated out. “You are.”

“You tried to stop me.”

“Because it fucking hurt” Gaara argued, “not because I didn’t deserve it.”

Kiba tore his eyes away from the mulish redhead and instead tried his luck with the doctor- a man of reason. “Dr. Kakashi, will you please explain to him-”

“Don’t drag him into this” Gaara snapped. “He’s not going to change my mind.”

Kakashi slid his gaze over to the exasperated brunette, his chin perched on his hands as he studied him. “Does that bother you, Kiba?”

“Of course it bothers me. It would bother anyone.”

“Gaara doesn’t seem to agree.”

The redhead rolled his eyes, but Kakashi chose to ignore the gesture.

“Kiba, why do you think Gaara doesn’t want an apology from you?”

“Because he expects people to hate him.”

“But you don’t” Kakashi pressed.

Kiba looked at him briefly before returning his weighted gaze to the man in question. “No” he said softly. “I don’t.”

“And why do you think that is?”

“Because he shouldn’t have been hated in the first place.”

Gaara laughed though the sound came out mangled and insincere. Broken- revealing far more than he would have liked it to.

“You don’t know anything about me” he growled, wanting the anger to stay. Hating how much pain he could hear in his own voice, knowing that Kiba could hear it too.

“Do you.. hate me?” Kiba asked quietly.

Gaara leapt to his feet again, and again Iruka forced him back to his chair. “Alright, alright! Get off of me, dammit.” He shot his eyes back to Kiba. “And no! I don’t hate you. Don’t even say something so fucking-”

“Stupid? Is it stupid?”

“Yes, it is!”

“Gaara, you saw me.. like that. I changed. I attacked you.” Kiba swallowed hard. “You could have died.”

Gaara scoffed at the thought. “Don’t be dramatic. I wasn’t going to die.”

“Why don’t you hate me for hurting you?”

“Goddamnit- I already told you! I deserved it! But you didn’t!”

“Gaara, Kiba regrets his actions” Kakashi interjected, seeing that the two weren’t getting very far on their own. “Why are you unwilling to hear him out?”

“I don’t want his fucking pity, that’s why.”

“Do you want his forgiveness?”

“I-” Gaara paused. He looked over and found those wide brown eyes, and all the fight seemed to slip away from him. “I don’t know..” he murmured.

“You seem to think you don’t deserve it” Kakashi pointed out.

“Because I don’t.”

“But that’s not the same as wanting it.”

“I want a lot of things I shouldn’t...”

Kiba was surprised by the sheer longing he heard in Gaara’s voice. In fact, they all were. Kakashi wasn’t sure that he should pry any further, but the question was out before he could think on it more.

“What is it that you want, Gaara?”

Gaara’s heart heaved in his chest, a sensation that sent goosebumps down his arms. He could feel tears gather in the back of his throat, and heat rise to his face with the shame that followed.

“I…”

He looked over at the brunette sitting across from him. The man he had teased and hurt. The guy who went feral on his ass and nearly tore his throat out in the process. The person he couldn’t stop thinking about.

That he didn’t want to stop thinking about.

“I want him” he said quietly.

Gaara cleared his throat, forcing back the emotions lodged inside, then met those warm eyes and said what he knew he didn’t have the right to say.

“I want you, Kiba.”

Iruka’s eyes shot over to Kakashi’s, his shock blatantly apparent. Kakashi seemed to be just as surprised by the admission as he was.

“Gaara..” he said slowly, “I understand that you feel a connection to Kiba, and that can-”

“You don’t understand anything” Gaara snarled over him. “I have never wanted anything more in my life.”

He looked over at the shocked brunette again. “Kiba, I know I don’t deserve you. And I’m not asking you for anything in return. I just.. I needed you to know.”

“I knew.”

Gaara blinked. “You did..?”

Kiba nodded. “I mean, you already told me, remember? You wanted me to take my clothes off and-”

“He said what?!” Iruka grabbed the redhead, pulling his focus away. “Did you do something to him?!”

“Iruka.”

Kakashi’s voice cut through his bout of panic and Iruka quickly released the patient. “I’m sorry” he muttered.

“Gaara” Kakashi said calmly, “did you do anything inappropriate to Kiba?”

“No” he eyed the brunette across from him, his gaze heavy, penetrating. “But I wanted to.”

“I must remind you that actions like that are not permitted in my hospital.”

Iruka nearly rolled his eyes at that considering what the two of them had done in Kakashi’s office three days ago, but he managed to maintain his professionalism. He could jest about it with his boyfriend later- preferably not in front of their patients.

“I know that” Gaara growled.

“And I expect you to follow those rules” Kakashi said firmly. “I want you to stay, Gaara, but if you can’t do that I will have to have you brought to a different facility.”

Both patients turned to look at him fast.

“No, please” Kiba said, “Gaara doesn’t need to be sent away.”

“I understand that you feel guilty, Kiba, but I cannot allow relations between my patients. If that does happen, I do expect you to report it.”

Kiba glanced over at the redhead and something flashed between them. Some shared understanding that made Kakashi feel on edge.

“I understand.”

Gaara nodded, though his eyes never left Kiba’s face. “So do I.”

Kakashi gave the two a disbelieving look, but neither saw it. He shook his head. Shit, this isn’t going the way I thought it would.

Let’s see if we can get this back on track.

“If forgiveness is out of the question right now, maybe the two of you can settle for mutual understanding. Your actions hurt someone else, and neither of you are proud of that. Would you agree?”

They nodded, their eyes still locked on each other.

“And neither of you hate the other.”

Another nod. Another uninterrupted look.

Kakashi glanced over at Iruka. “I think that’s as good a start as any. Gaara, you are free to go to the community room during the day now. Kiba, you still have a few more days before you’ll be permitted to return.”

“What?!”

Gaara shot to his feet again, but this time Iruka’s hand wasn’t enough to make him stop.

“No! Don’t touch me! That’s not fair- I told you it was my goddamn fault! He doesn’t need to be punished for this!”

Kakashi leapt to his feet and came around his desk to help Iruka regain control, but Gaara dodged both of them. He rushed over to Kiba and pulled him into his arms.

“I won’t let them do this to you” he breathed in his hair, arms tightening around his waist. “They can’t.”

“Gaara, it’s ok.”

“No! It’s not fucking ok!”

Iruka grabbed one arm and Kakashi grabbed the other and the two wrenched him away from the startled brunette. Gaara screamed, desperation writhing under his skin and tearing from his throat as they pulled him further away.

“Stop!! Stop! Don’t take him! Please! Don’t take him!”

“Gaara, you need to calm down. Kiba will be back soon.”

They pulled him back another step and tightened their hold as Gaara struggled to break free. He threw his head back and howled with rage, and Kiba took a fast step towards him.

Kakashi threw a hand out, his eyes as sharp as his voice. “Kiba. That won’t help.”

“He’s upset.”

“Yes, I can see that. But your actions are going to make him more upset if you’re in your room longer, right?”

Kiba paused as he considered the doctor and his threats. “There are other patients who have gotten close, Dr. Kakashi. Is it really so wrong for Gaara and I to do the same?”

An image of Naruto and Sasuke, tucked close on that dingy orange chair, came to mind and Kakashi couldn’t deny that he had a point. Maybe I’ve been too lenient with them..

“You’ll see Gaara in two days” Kakashi said. “Unless you give me a reason to keep you two separated longer.”

Kiba looked over at the restrained redhead. Gaara was livid, clearly desperate to be with him, and it would only make things worse if Kiba did the same.

“I understand.”

He took a step back and Gaara lurched against the men holding onto him, anxious to see Kiba pulling away. “No, wait!”

Kiba gave him a soft smile and another step back. “See” he said quietly. “You don’t really want to be hated, Gaara.

You never have.”

A strained sound fell from Gaara’s lips as the brunette continued to move further and further away from him. Kakashi looked alarmed when he grabbed the door handle, but he had no need to be.

“Asuma, sir, I’m ready to go back to my room.”

The orderly on the other side of the door looked surprised, and suddenly sheepish when he caught his boss’ eyes. “I’m sorry, sir. I just thought you could use some back up..”

Kakashi waved away his concerns. “It’s fine, Asuma. You can escort Kiba back to his room.”

“No!! Wait! Just let me talk to him!”

Asuma gestured to the irate redhead between them. “Want any help with him?”

“Iruka and I will escort Gaara to his own room once you’re gone.”

Asuma nodded then grabbed hold of Kiba’s arm and guided him down the hall. Gaara’s distressed cries followed after them, but Kiba didn’t look back. He knew it was better for Gaara if he didn’t.

Kakashi had made it perfectly clear. The only way they would be able to get closer was if the people around here thought they’d grown further apart. That was probably what Sasuke and Naruto had figured out, and the exact reason they were able to be so close now.

The less attention they drew, the more they could get away with.

Kiba smiled to himself, careful to let his long unruly hair hide it from the man beside him. A plan was forming in his mind, one that he would make sure to keep to himself.

Don’t worry, Gaara. I’m not going anywhere.

And neither are you.

Chapter Text

“Ughh! Why am I so bad at being good?!”

-Prince Zuko

--

Sasuke smoothed back disheveled blonde locks as he gazed down at Naruto’s face- all of his affection, his longing, made perfectly apparent. Those big blue eyes peered up at him, a look that sent heat spiraling to his core. There was so much acceptance in it, so much innocence.

It made him want to defile every inch of his body.

The raven ran his tongue along his bottom lip then slowly dragged his teeth across it, aching to taste the blonde in its place. Naruto shivered under that penetrating gaze, but his trepidation only made Sasuke want him more. He shifted closer on the bed, his entire being vibrating with anticipation as that ocean stare widened. He saw Naruto’s full lips press tight, watched them hesitate before uttering his name, and his chest swelled with a longing sharper than any he had ever known.

He watched attentively as his lips stayed parted, like they weren’t ready to shut him out just yet. Sasuke didn’t respond- fuck, he couldn’t respond- so Naruto said it all over again.

The second time was just as sweet and enticing as the first.

“S-Sasuke..?”

Fuck.

Hearing his name in that voice, breathed between those lips- it was enough to drive a man to madness.

Sasuke barely suppressed a moan as he pressed his waist close, his groin closer, not in the least bit subtle about what he wanted. What he was tempted to just reach out and take. Too many nights kept apart from each other, too many needs unmet. He just wasn’t sure he could hold out much longer.

Sasuke wanted things to be different with Naruto, truly- he did. But..

Fuck, I mean, he’s right here, practically begging for it.

Sasuke found his blonde’s unwavering stare once more and held it as he closed what little distance lay between them.

I’ve waited long enough.

Smooth raven strands fell forward to caresses the blonde’s whiskered cheek as long lithe fingers reached out to do the same. Naruto’s breath caught, goosebumps raising on chilled skin at the sudden intimacy. This wasn’t his first night with Sasuke like this, and yet every moment with him felt like it was. He wasn’t sure he would ever get used to this.

He almost said exactly that, finding it difficult to contain the rush of emotions inside, but Sasuke spoke before he got the chance.

“I want you” he breathed, desire bursting in his chest as Naruto continued to shiver against him. “God, Naruto.. I want you so fucking bad.”

“I-” Naruto’s throat clicked. “I… don’t know if I’m ready to…”

Sasuke clenched his jaw hard as he struggled to force back his rage. He hated himself for getting pissed off at a time like this, but it was so hard holding back. And Naruto clearly didn’t get it.

He has no idea, he thought angrily. No fucking clue how many times I’ve stopped myself. How many times I have denied who I really am for him. But I just..

I can’t.

Not anymore.

With a feral growl, Sasuke shoved the nervous blonde flat against the mattress and rolled on top of him. He watched those blue eyes widen even more, saw Naruto’s lips open further as he gasped in surprise, and his desire, his pent-up frustrations, skyrocketed.

“Sa-”

Sasuke slammed a hand over his mouth, pinning one arm down with his forearm in the process. When Naruto went to push him back with the other, he grabbed his wrist and shoved it back down- pressing it firmly against the bed and leaving the blonde completely immobile. Those cerulean pools stared up at him, a flash of fear flickering inside, and all Sasuke could do was stare back.

You shouldn’t be doing this, he chided himself. You know you shouldn’t.

But Sasuke chose to ignore the voice of reason in his head. He knew full well he’d come to regret it, but it just wasn’t enough to make him stop.

Not this time.

He pushed his way between Naruto’s legs, forcing them further apart to make room for everything he intended on doing. He could feel Naruto’s muffled protest reverberate against his palm, a plea to bring back the Sasuke he knew- the Sasuke he had been trying so hard to become. The person he wanted so badly to be for Naruto.

This isn’t you, Sasuke thought. You KNOW this isn’t you. You’re not this person anymore- this monster who hurts people, who torments the ones who try to care.

You know this is wrong.

“I don’t care” he muttered to himself. “I never cared before- why the fuck should I care now? Why do I have to be the one to change.”

Naruto flinched violently, having caught every word and not sure what to make of any of it. He had seen Sasuke become unhinged numerous times, but nothing like this. Sasuke had a lot of rage in him, and constantly struggled controlling it, but Naruto had never questioned his humanity before. But now, after what he just heard, he was starting to wonder if he should.

Sasuke didn’t register the panic stirring beneath him, or just simply didn’t care to. He was wholly consumed by his desperate desire, and didn’t bother to consider the rest.

As Naruto trembled beneath him Sasuke slipped a hand down his side, searching for the waistband of his pants. Naruto tried to grab his wandering hand, to stop him, but Sasuke easily overpowered his every attempt. His fingers traced along the top of Naruto’s sweats, then slid behind him. He abruptly shoved down the thin material, exposing his backside, then moved his hand lower to join it.

“Mmnnph!!”

Naruto screamed into his palm as he bucked wildly against him- fighting the restraint pinning him down, the hand forcibly undressing him, and finally it got through. That cruel faraway look in Sasuke’s eyes cleared, and when their gazes met again Naruto finally saw someone he recognized.

Sasuke noticed his unshed tears, the flash of relief in his eyes. He swallowed hard, trying to force down the lump gathering in the back of his throat, but it seemed pretty deadset on staying. And he couldn’t blame it. It was too soon to shake off the guilt for what he had done- what he had intended on doing. He would need to sit with that shame for some time.

The remorseful raven slowly pulled his hand away then propped himself up, freeing Naruto’s silenced lips. He watched them part as he fought to catch his breath, and his guilt doubled.

What the fuck have I done..

“Naruto.. I-”

“W-why..” Naruto said quietly, his voice still trembling with the remnants of fear and adrenaline, “why did you.. do this?”

Sasuke felt every word cut through his twisted heart, and knew nothing he could say would fix it.

“Naruto.. I’m trying. I really am.”

Those huge blue eyes continued to stare up at him, brimming with the fear and confusion he had caused. “Are you going to hurt me?” Naruto said quietly.

Whatever jagged pieces were left of Sasuke’s heart practically ground to dust.

“Fuck- no. No, Naruto, I’m not going to hurt you.”

Naruto turned his head, his eyes landing on the hand that was once again wrapped firmly around his wrist.

“Will you let me go?”

Sasuke looked at it with him and found that he was wondering the exact same thing. “I don’t know” he finally answered. “I don’t want to.”

Naruto slowly turned his head, finding Sasuke’s penetrating gaze once more. “Why are you doing this?”

“Because-”

Because what? Am I really going to say it’s because I want to fuck him so bad it hurts?

That I don’t know how to keep myself from being a monster? That the Sasuke he knows isn’t real- he’s just someone I’m trying to be for his sake?

How can I fucking say that?!

“Sasuke?”

The raven looked down and was surprised to find that familiar blank look when he did. Whatever fear he’d seen there before, it was already gone. Almost like-

Like he isn’t afraid, he thought. Like he’s already back to trusting me again.

But he shouldn’t.

Sasuke clenched his jaw hard, grinding his teeth together as he jerked against the idiot blonde beneath him- reminding him of the position he was in, of what Sasuke had done to him. What he had almost done.

What he was still tempted to do.

“How can you be so calm when I have you pinned down like this?” he snarled, anger rising in his voice and burning in his veins all over again. “Don’t you understand what I could do to you? What I want to do to you?!”

“I’ve never.. I’ve never even kissed anyone before you, Sasuke” Naruto said quietly. “Do you really think I’ve ever slept with someone?”

The raven paused at that, but the anger had yet to subside. Naruto could see that, but he didn’t flinch away from it this time. He just kept staring at him.

Like he always did.

“Are you..” Naruto bit his lip as he struggled to find the right words. “Are you really not going to wait?”

“Dammit” Sasuke snapped. “God. Fucking. Dammit!!”

He finally released Naruto’s wrist, but he didn’t move away from him. Instead he reached between them and shoved his pants down, displaying his massive erection. Naruto’s eyes left his face to stare down at it, then at the hand that was making quick work of his own boxers.

“Sa- ahhhh!”

Naruto threw his head back and slammed his eyes shut as Sasuke wrapped his hand around both of their cocks, forcing them close as he roughly pumped their lengths. Sasuke moved desperately against him, thrusting into his hand without abandon, ignoring the voice in his head screaming at him to stop.

He rolled his hips, aching to feel more, and nearly lost all composure when Naruto started meeting every thrust with one of his own. He jerked against Sasuke’s hand, his back arched, his moans getting louder. Sasuke kissed him hard, their tongues wet and hot as they rode out their climaxes with matching desperation. Sasuke kept his eyes open, watching Naruto’s roll as he stilled beneath him. He shoved his tongue deeper and seconds later their shared releases sprayed between them.

Sasuke pulled out of Naruto’s mouth, out of his own hand, and a heaviness soon followed- one that he readily succumbed to. He let his body fall limply against Naruto’s as he finally relinquished his hold on him. He was afraid to meet his eyes, so he buried his face in the crook of Naruto’s neck- breathing in his scent and embracing the moment for as long as he could.

After a while though the guilt, the silence- it became unbearable. Sasuke sighed against his blonde and slowly pushed himself up to see him. To face him.

“Naruto, fuck, I’m sorry” he said, knowing it wasn’t enough but not sure what else to say.

The blonde furrowed his brows, his unblinking stare locked on tight. “For what?”

Now Sasuke was confused.

“For this! Christ, Naruto, come on! I took advantage of you. I forced myself on you. The least you can do is be pissed off about it!”

“You didn’t force me.”

Sasuke gave him an incredulous look. “Are you kidding me?”

“I like doing that with you” Naruto said simply.

“I held you down!”

“Because you wanted to force me” Naruto pointed out. “But you didn’t.”

Sasuke could not be more bewildered. “Naruto, you can’t- you can’t just explain this away.”

“Why?”

“Because I fucking assaulted you! Do you think that’s ok?”

“Is it assault if I like it?”

“Do you even hear yourself right now?! Yes! It is!”

Naruto seemed to consider his words, but it was clear that Sasuke wasn’t getting through to him. He was about to say more, but Naruto spoke before he could.

“I’m confused. Do you want me to be mad at you?”

Yes.

“It doesn’t matter what I want” Sasuke argued.

“It matters to me.”

The raven gave the blonde a pained look. “Naruto, how do you still not see it?”

Another sigh flew from Sasuke’s lips, grazing his blonde’s flush cheeks. His jaw tightened. “I’m not… good. I hurt people. I hurt you. I’m angry, all the time, and I take it out on you. How could you want anything with me?”

“I thought you said you want me..” Naruto murmured, his voice horribly defeated.

“I do want you” Sasuke said quickly. “That’s the fucking problem.”

“Why is that a problem?”

“Because I’m not good, Naruto! Fuck, I’m trying to show you someone better, but what’s really in here-”

Sasuke stabbed at his chest, at the sorry excuse for a heart inside.

“-it isn’t someone you should like.”

Naruto tilted his head as he considered the flustered raven above him, the anger resonating off him. He could hear the pain buried beneath that anger, and something else. Something that felt.. desperate, scared even. A truth he could relate to, even if Sasuke couldn’t see it himself.

“I can’t change how I feel” Naruto said bluntly, “and I don’t want to. Do you want to change how you feel about me?”

Sasuke couldn’t help but smile a little at that, though he felt incredibly guilty for it when he did. “No, I don’t. I should” he admitted, “but I don’t.”

Sasuke lowered his face, once more finding the crook of Naruto’s neck.

“Does that make me a bad person?” he whispered across his skin, sending goosebumps to rise to the surface.

Naruto tilted his head slightly, trying to get a look at the raven pressed close against him. “I thought you said you already are a bad person.”

Sasuke smirked at first, always amused by Naruto’s candidness, but the smile faltered as those words seeped in. It was something he’d normally be lighthearted about- the way he usually was when he said things like that to Naruto. But it was different now.

Naruto might downplay it, but Sasuke couldn’t. What he did to him, what he tried to do- it wasn’t right. And Naruto’s quick forgiveness only made it worse.

 “That’s right, Naruto” he said quietly.

“I am a bad person.”

--

Sasuke assumed things would be weird between them after that, and once again Naruto proved him wrong.

The next morning was just like any other. Naruto was waiting for him at what now felt like their chair, their shared journal already on his lap, and the hint of a smile blooming in his eyes as he watched him approach. Sasuke couldn’t deny that he felt a sense of relief seeing him so undaunted by his presence, but he couldn’t shake the shame that came with it.

This isn’t right.

The thought echoed through Sasuke relentlessly and continued even as he took his spot beside him.

“Naruto-”

He wanted to scream at him that he was wrong to forgive him, to grab him and shake him violently until he understood how fucked up all of this was. But a better part of him knew not to go that route with it. So, he decided to try a different approach. When Naruto turned to give him a questioning look, Sasuke simply took his pen and the journal and flipped to a fresh page. He could feel Naruto’s eyes on him as he wrote, but he didn’t interrupt. He just waited and, in usual Naruto-fashion, he quietly stared.

Sasuke scribbled down what he hoped didn’t read as just a bunch of angry nonsense, gave it a quick once-over, then handed the notebook back to the blonde. Naruto gave the raven a curious look before dropping his gaze to the words scrawled across the page.

First, I need you to understand that I don’t want to be away from you. Ever. But that doesn’t mean that you should just let me get away with shit like that. I need you to care more about yourself, Naruto. Because it fucking bothers me to see you so forgiving.

I’m an asshole and if you really do want to be with me, you can't be afraid to stand up for yourself. You should be mad at me for this.

In fact, I would understand if you hated me.

I deserve it.

Naruto’s eyes lingered on the last two sentences in Sasuke’s note, even as the letters blurred into one indistinguishable blot in the middle of the page. He couldn’t unsee it, couldn’t focus on anything else.

I would understand if you hated me.

I deserve it.

Naruto’s throat click and his eyes finally broke free of the journal to find Sasuke’s pained stare.

“Sasuke..” he breathed, but nothing else came out with it. He wasn’t sure where to even start. He just wanted to take away what he saw- printed on the page and flashing in his eyes.

But Sasuke wasn’t interested in waiting for him try or hearing him out. In fact, he didn’t want to hear his response at all. The raven just shook his head and held out the pen, his gesture insistent. When Naruto hesitated, when his lips parted to speak anyways, Sasuke quickly interjected to stop him.

“Just write it, Naruto.” He paused, then added, “please”.

The blonde was still reluctant to stay quiet on the matter, but he also knew he was never all that great with words. Maybe it would be better to put it on paper instead.

Naruto begrudgingly took the pen from Sasuke’s hand, clicked life into it, and lowered it to the page a few lines beneath Sasuke’s entry. He thought it would be difficult, finding the words to all of the thoughts swirling around inside, but it turned out to be a far easier feat than expected. Apparently journaling his experiences over the last year here had paid off. The words flowed on their own and it wasn’t long before he was checking his response and handing the journal back to Sasuke.

He felt confident about what he had to say at first, at the very least fine with it, but that changed the second the notebook left his hands. As soon as Sasuke took it, anxiety hit Naruto like a freight train. He found himself reaching out, suddenly desperate to take it back, but Sasuke captured his hand and gently pulled it back down.

“Relax, Naruto. It’s ok. You have nothing to worry about.”

The blonde stared openly at him, wondering how he could understand him in this moment so easily while simultaneously misunderstanding so many others. Of course, that thought remained trapped inside with the rest and he was left to gnaw at his bottom lip as Sasuke carefully read over his response.

Naruto was sure he was going to be sick but Sasuke gave his hand a gentle squeeze, and he managed to keep his breakfast at bay for the time being. He watched Sasuke grab the pen from his hand, saw him press the edge to his lip as he reread his reply. Naruto leaned closer to his shoulder to do the same, wondering if seeing it again would soothe his anxiety or simply make it ten-times worse.

He figured it was at least worth a shot.

Especially since Sasuke was reading it again.

He went back to attacking his bottom lip as he pulled his stare away from the raven and dropped it once more to the notebook between them.

I don’t hate you, Sasuke, and I’m surprised that you think I should. I admit that it scared me, but you stopped. I get the feeling that you want me to be mad at you, but that’s not how I feel. Are you really just worried about what happened, or are you trying to push me away?

If there’s more to this, will you tell me?

Also, you said it bothers you when I’m so forgiving. Well, it bothers me when you expect to be hated.

You don’t deserve it.

Sasuke stared at the page for a while, then wrote a quick reply and handed the journal back.

You don’t know me as well as you think you do, Naruto.

Naruto’s brows furrowed and he thought on that a moment before writing his own short response.

Then maybe you should change that, Sasuke.

The raven couldn’t help but smile. He grabbed the pen, wrote in the notebook, then handed it back to his blonde. Naruto met his gaze and held it for a moment before slipping it back to the collection of messages between them.

Are you sure you won’t regret it?

Naruto held out his hand, palm up, waiting expectantly. When Sasuke dropped the pen in his hand he wrote one word and gave the journal back.

No.

Sasuke rolled his eyes.

Thanks, Naruto, that’s very reassuring.

Naruto took the pen again and quickly scrawled another note.

I don’t know how I’ll feel in the future, but I know how I feel now.

He handed their notebook back, expecting another written response, but Sasuke took his hand instead, letting the rest fall to his lap.

“I still don’t think I deserve you..” he murmured.

“I know” Naruto answered honestly, “but that doesn’t make it true.”

“Says the guy who thought I wasn’t real.”

“That only happened one time.”

Sasuke couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re so.. so-”

“Schizophrenic?”

“Ridiculous.”

Naruto tilted his head, a curious look shining in his brilliant blues. “Is that bad?”

Sasuke reached out and gently tucked a blonde strand behind his ear, his fingers lingering, that familiar longing stirring in his gut all over again.

“No, Naruto” he said softly. “Nothing about you is bad.”

Sasuke meant that, wholeheartedly. He truly could not find a single thing to dislike about Naruto.

He only wished he could say the same about himself.

Chapter Text

“If sweetness can win, and it can, then I’ll be here tomorrow, to high-five you yesterday, my friend.”

-The Royal Tart Toter

--

Sasuke and Naruto had just settled back in their chair, content with the peaceful silence and afternoon laziness that fell between them, when a certain redhead made a sudden appearance.

And an unwelcome one at that.

Sasuke had just so happened to open his eyes to take another look at his beautiful blonde when he spotted the guy moseying his way into the room. A rush of fury instantly shot through him at the sight of the bastard- one he couldn’t ignore. Sasuke didn’t care that he looked drained, that the bandage around his neck immediately reminded him of teeth burying into it. None of that mattered. This was the guy who had antagonized Naruto, who had pinned him down when he fought to get his notebook back. Sasuke could still see him pressed down on top of his blonde, a cruel smile stretched across his face, and it made his blood boil.

Hell, it practically burst into flames.

Naruto felt Sasuke stiffen next to him, and turned to see what had caused it. It didn’t take long to figure out what had the raven so furious. And Naruto couldn’t completely blame him for it. He understood why Sasuke felt that way, he did, but he honestly didn’t share the sentiment. After the savage attack he saw the redhead suffer at Kiba’s hands, or teeth rather, he felt nothing but pity for the man. Naruto couldn’t help but remember the guy’s reaction to Kiba’s vicious attack- how the redhead had tried to explain why he deserved it, how Kiba wasn’t at fault.

I hurt him first.

He may have been a bit of a jerk at first, and he clearly enjoyed getting a rise out of people, but Naruto didn’t feel any animosity towards him. And he’d prefer if Sasuke didn’t either.

Naruto’s eyes flickered back to the indignant raven beside him- noting the fire in his eyes, the tension in his shoulders. He was clearly on the verge of springing from the chair and launching himself at the redhead, and Naruto felt the sudden urge to stop him before he could.

He placed a hand on Sasuke’s knee and pressed down hard, watching with something akin to caution and fascination as Sasuke’s conviction faltered. He had not expected his meager protest to have any affect on the raven honestly, not in the slightest, and was surprised to see that it had. Though, he wasn’t sure how long it would last. You never really knew when it came to Sasuke.

Self-control wasn’t always his strong suit.

“Sasuke, don’t.”

Obsidian eyes hardened. “He doesn’t deserve your forgiveness, Naruto.”

“I’m not mad at him, Sasuke. And I don’t want you to hurt him.”

“So, what- you want to be his friend?!” he spat, the mere thought making his pulse race, his stomach tighten. 

Naruto sighed. “He just wanted to get a rise out of me. He didn’t hurt me. So I don’t want to hurt him.”

It was a reasonable deduction, but Sasuke still wasn’t pleased.

“You don’t have to hurt him” he growled. “I’ll do it for you.”

“I’d rather you didn’t.”

Sasuke pinched the bridge of his nose, doing his best to dial back his anger. “Dammit, Naruto. Why can’t you just-”

“Please, Sasuke? You saw what Kiba did to him. And I know you heard what he said.”

The raven sighed. “Yeah.. I heard.”

Naruto eyed him for a moment longer before slipping his gaze over to the dejected redhead at the far end of the room. He watched him fidget with his hands, staring down at tangled fingers before lifting his gaze to absolutely nothing. Naruto studied his pale green eyes, noting how hollow they seemed to look. Empty.

He looks so lonely, he thought. So.. lost.

He knew the feeling.

Naruto’s chest clenched tight. “I don’t think he’s a bad person.”

It infuriated Sasuke for Naruto to say it. Not only because he didn’t think the bastard deserved his forgiveness, but also because Sasuke felt like a terrible person himself. If that guy wasn’t, that meant that he was better than Sasuke. And therefore more deserving of someone like Naruto.

The thought sickened him.

Sasuke couldn’t fathom losing Naruto to someone like that, and he couldn’t stomach the thought that he was worse in his blonde’s eyes. He didn’t want to compare himself to someone who had nothing to do with either of them, but he just couldn’t help it. His insecurities had floundered their way back to the surface and were becoming increasingly more difficult to ignore.

Especially after last night.

It would be easy to take all of his frustrations out on the bastard across the room, but it wouldn’t be right. At least, not in Naruto’s eyes- and that was enough to change Sasuke’s mind. He’s messed up plenty with Naruto. He had no desire to make things any worse between them.

So, if Naruto really wanted him to back off the guy, he supposed he really didn’t have a choice.

“Fine” the Uchiha finally growled. “But if he oversteps again, I’ll be the one to put him in his place.”

“Ok” Naruto said simply.

Then he rose to his feet and, without explanation nor hesitation, made his way over to the redhead. Sasuke gave the back of Naruto’s head an incredulous look but sprang into action soon after. He leapt to his feet and rushed over to the overtly determined blonde, eyes blazing when he just continued to walk on anyways.

Sasuke quickly checked to make sure the orderlies weren’t paying attention to them then grabbed Naruto’s arm. He jerked him back a step and roughly spun him around. “What do you think you’re doing?” he snarled.

Naruto glanced over at him, his face expressionless, eyes wide and sincere. “I’m going to say hello.”

“And why the hell would you do that?”

“Because he looks sad.”

Sasuke gave the blonde an exasperated look. “So what! Let him be sad.”

“It gets lonely here” Naruto said quietly. “I remember being sad like that too.”

Sasuke paused at that. He looked closely at his blonde, seeing past that blank look of his- finding the pain that still lingered underneath.

Naruto wanted to do the right thing, Sasuke knew that, but it still frustrated him. He wanted to drag him away from the damn ginger-bastard, but it wasn’t his call. He knew it, and it was plenty apparent that Naruto did too.

Sasuke sighed again. “You really know how to drive a guy crazy, you know that?”

“I didn’t, but I guess it’s possible.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. “Fine. Go. But I’m coming with you.”

Naruto didn’t comment. He simply pulled his arm free and continued his steady pace across the room. When they were only a few feet away the redhead finally turned his gaze over to them. It was obvious by his widening eyes that he was surprised to see them standing there, but that quickly turned to wariness- one that neither could blame him for having. They watched the redhead tense, preparing himself for the worst.

“What do you two want..?” Gaara muttered, assuming he already knew the answer but asking anyways.

Might as well get this over with.

Naruto’s focus shifted to the large bandage plastered onto the side of his neck before locking onto those wary jade eyes once more. It took him a moment to figure out what he wanted to say, but oddly enough Gaara waited patiently while he sought out the best words to start with.

“How.. are you feeling?” he finally asked.

Gaara quirked a brow. “What do you care?”

“You look sad” Naruto said frankly. “Is it because you’re in pain? Or because you’re feeling lonely?”

Gaara gave the blonde another curious look, wondering over what seemed to be genuine concern, but he quickly masked his interest with hostility. He just wasn’t ready to accept something like that. Especially from these two.

“Fuck off” he spat. “I don’t need your pity.”

Naruto thought on that for a moment before calmly responding. “Do you need a friend?”

“How’s that any different?”

“Friends stay” Naruto said matter-of-factly. “Pity doesn’t.”

Gaara barked a humorless laugh. “Why the hell would you want to be my friend?” His gaze shifted to the raven standing quietly to his side. “And let’s be honest- you definitely don’t want to.”

“Was it that obvious?”

Naruto nudged his mouthy raven in the ribs. “Sasuke.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.”

Gaara looked between the two, still utterly confounded to find them in front of him like this. He watched them exchange a few murmurings, then dropped his gaze to his lap.

The last thing I need is more people trying to push their way into my life.

Gaara dragged long pale fingers through blood-red hair, a heavy sigh tumbling from his lips. “Look, this has been fun and all but how about you two get lost, hm? Just.. leave me alone.”

Naruto chose to take his words as more of a suggestion than an order and therefore found them easy to reject. So, instead of leaving the redhead to mope by himself, he pulled over a chair and took a seat directly in front of him.

Gaara gave the obstinate blonde a flabbergasted look. “What the hell- I said get lost!”

Sasuke reluctantly pulled a chair over for himself and sat beside his blonde, making himself comfortable despite the redhead’s continued protests.

“Hey! Are you two even listening to me?!”

Naruto tilted his head to the side, his resolute stare locked on Gaara’s reddening face. “Yes” he said easily. “I’m listening.”

Gaara’s eyes flashed with rage. “Then. Fuck. Off.”

Naruto didn’t even flinch. In fact, he ignored his anger altogether. “Do you want to try doing an activity together?”

“Jesus Christ- I said leave!”

Gaara leapt up, his fists clenched tight, trembling with unwavering wrath and razor-sharp adrenaline. He took a fast step towards them but Sasuke jolted to his feet, stopping him before he could get very far. He moved to stand in front of his blonde, eyes dark with murderous intent.

“Don’t even think about it” he growled, the promise of pain tucked between every syllable.

Gaara looked like he had a retort locked and loaded, but another voice cut in before he could say it.

“Sabaku! Uchiha! Do we have a problem here?”

Sasuke briefly glanced at the approaching orderly before returning his focus to the fuming redhead. “No” he lied between his teeth. “We were just getting to know each other.”

The man gave him a disbelieving look. “Yeah, well, I’m sure you can do that just fine sitting down. And maybe try a smile while you’re at it, hm?”

Neither were amused by the remark, so they chose to ignore it. And the orderly altogether, for that matter. Sasuke just continued to glare at the redhead, waiting for him to stand down first, refusing to admit fault. Which he felt was accurate. He hasn’t so much as touched the guy, and none of his threats were explicitly stated. All he was really doing was protecting Naruto, and he wasn’t going to feel bad about that. So even with Naruto tugging at his shirt and the orderly barking his demands, Sasuke didn’t back down.

On the other hand, seeing Sasuke’s resolve seemed to weaken Gaara’s. A heartbeat later the redhead finally relented and stepped back to his chair. He dropped down onto it- anger still flashing in his eyes, though it seemed to have cooled several degrees at this point. Sasuke waited a moment longer before doing the same, though he wouldn’t be letting his guard down anytime soon. He didn’t trust the guy. Wouldn’t trust the guy.

Not after how he treated Naruto before.

The orderly gave the three another scrutinizing look before relaying more demands. “I don’t want to see any bickering from you three. Play nice or I’ll have to send all of you back to your rooms. Got it?”

They all nodded, which wasn’t exactly the ‘yes, sir’ he had been hoping for, but he figured it would have to do. With one last warning look, the orderly stepped away from the group to continue his rounds and a silence fell between them. It might have lasted longer, but when Gaara glanced over at the two he noticed Naruto’s relentless stare, and he couldn’t help but comment on it.

“Why are you staring at me?”

Naruto tilted his head. “Does it bother you?”

“How about you just answer my question.”

“Watch your tone” Sasuke snapped.

“Right, like you’re one to talk” Gaara shot back.

Sasuke clenched his hands into tight fists all over again, but Naruto covered one with his hand, quickly dousing some of the fire rising inside.

“It’s ok, Sasuke.” He turned to look at the redhead again. “I’m sorry for staring. It’s.. kind of a habit.”

Gaara narrowed his eyes, meeting that constant stare despite his obvious discomfort with it. “Something to do with why you’re in here?” he guessed.

“Sort of.”

Gaara rubbed the back of his neck, suddenly exhausted. “If I tell you I’m fine, will you leave me alone?”

“No.”

Gaara raised a brow then shifted his gaze to the raven instead. “Is he always this honest?”

“Is that any of your business?”

“Christ. Whatever. You know, this whole thing has been just thrilling but I’m really not in the mood to deal with Jekyll and Hyde right now. I don’t know how else I can possibly say it. I want to be left the fuck alone. So what is it going to take for you to do that?”

“Have you talked to Kiba?”

Gaara froze. Just the sound of his name was enough to send his heart racing- a rush of guilt, shame, and longing flooding through his entire body. And something else with it.

He was suddenly, inexplicably, angry for him.

He wanted to protect Kiba- from harm, from scrutiny, from judgment. He would not allow anyone to spew hate when it came to that little brunette.

No one.

Gaara’s eyes hardened. “Watch what you say about him.”

Naruto furrowed his brows, puzzled by the new anger he saw on his face. “Kiba’s my friend. I won’t say anything bad.”

Gaara’s eyes shot over to the blonde fast and all anger immediately fell to the wayside. “Your friend? Really?”

Naruto nodded.

“For how long?” Gaara asked, his words rushed, the desperation in his voice impossible to ignore.

Naruto was surprised to hear it, but he didn’t ask about it. “I don’t know” he answered honestly, “but he’s been here as long as I have. I think we’ve been friends for most of that year, but it’s hard to tell so I’m not sure.”

Sasuke rolled his eyes. Those two are ridiculous. Why are they so awkward about that? How hard is it to admit that you’re friends?

Though he figured he shouldn’t be all that surprised. Two very unbalanced minds missing a few obvious signs- this probably wasn’t anything new for either of them. And if he knew Naruto, it definitely wouldn’t be the last.

Gaara leaned forward in his chair, his focus still wholly locked on Naruto. “What do you know about him?” he asked eagerly. “What does he like? Is he close to anyone else here? Does he ever have any visitors? Where is he from?”

Before Naruto could speak Sasuke threw an arm out to silence him. “Why do you want to know?” he asked suspiciously. “Planning your revenge?”

“No!” Gaara all but screamed, pissed that he would even suggest such a thing. “I won’t hurt him. Never again.”

Sasuke was surprised by the conviction in his voice, the sincerity in his once hollow eyes. “Have a change of heart?” he said, his voice brimming with sarcasm though he did wonder on the reality of that.

“Yes. I have.”

The look Gaara gave him lacked any hint of mirth. He meant what he said, wholeheartedly. Naruto read the look just as clearly as Sasuke did and was just as surprised by it. At first. But he made sense of it pretty quick, and he couldn’t keep his revelation to himself.

“You like him.”

It wasn’t a question, but Gaara replied to it all the same.

“There a problem with that?”

Naruto thought it over, then shook his head. “No, I don’t think so. Though.. he might not like you back. He was pretty angry before.”

“He isn’t angry anymore.”

Naruto’s eyes widened at that. “So you did talk to him.”

It wasn’t an unreasonable deduction, but it did seem to snap Gaara out of whatever spell Naruto had him under.

Why the hell did I tell him all of that?

“If you’re not going to tell me about Kiba then leave” Gaara snapped. “I’m done talking.”

Once again, the blonde didn’t seem to be the least bit offended by his abrasiveness. Gaara couldn’t exactly explain why, but it irked him. He preferred getting a reaction out of people, but so far the only thing that seemed to do that for the blonde was having his notebook taken. Gaara didn’t really have any interest in doing that again, but that didn’t mean he was all that satisfied with their current interaction. He was about to tell the emotionless blonde to get lost for the hundredth time, but Naruto spoke before he got the chance. And what he had to say made Gaara rethink what he had intended to.

“I know a few things about Kiba. They’re not really a secret, so it’s probably ok to tell you.”

Obviously Gaara would have liked to hear some of the juicier details about the brunette who had managed to capture his interest, but he was happy to hear anything at this point. He just wanted to know him. To get close to him.

He figured this was as good a start as any.

“I’m listening.”

“Well, he likes to paint” Naruto started- a fact that Gaara was already plenty aware of, though he didn’t say as much. He didn’t want to ruin his chance of hearing more. “The symbol he paints on his face represents being a warrior in his tribe. He repaints it everyday. He told me he doesn’t want to forget where he comes from.”

Gaara’s eyes softened as he thought about the brunette being homesick. It sent a pang through his chest, but he kept quiet about it. There was still so much more he wanted to know about him, that he needed to know. Luckily, Naruto continued.

“He says that wolves are his people’s original ancestors, and that they are connected to them. He calls that part of himself Aka-something. Akamaru, I think? It comes out during full moons or..” Naruto glanced at the bandage on Gaara’s neck, “when he’s really mad.”

Once again, Gaara chose not to comment. And once more, it didn’t hinder Naruto from sharing.

“He’s very kind. When some of the people here get upset, Kiba tries to talk to them- to help them. He’s helped me before too..”

Naruto paused as a collection of memories flashed through his mind. Of Kiba talking him through his panic, dropping a calming hand on his shoulder when the hallucinations overwhelmed him or when the loneliness became unbearable.

He felt guilty for not doing the same in return.

“I’m not good at that” Naruto admitted. “I should have helped Kiba too.”

Gaara understood the feeling.

“He seems happy when we get beef for dinner- I think it’s his favorite food. He’s never told me, but he smiles when we do.”

A minor detail, but Gaara made sure to file it away in his head for safe keeping. It may turn out to be useful at some point.

“Anything else?” he pressed.

“I don’t think he likes cooked carrots” Naruto added. “He picks them out.”

Gaara nodded. “Ok. Ok, that’s.. thanks. If you learn anything else about him, will you tell me?”

“Maybe.”

“Maybe?” Gaara repeated, his voice sharp with irritation.

Naruto didn’t seem bothered by the tone, though his boyfriend looked plenty pissed about it.

“If it’s something Kiba doesn’t want you to know, then I won’t.”

Gaara couldn’t deny that it was a fair answer, though he still wasn’t happy to hear it. “Fine.” He dropped back in his chair and once again fixed a dismissive look on the two across from him. “We talked. Are we done here?”

“Does Kiba like you back?” Naruto suddenly asked.

Gaara was momentarily caught off guard by the question, and at first he wasn’t sure how to answer it. Or if he even should, for that matter. Kiba wasn’t there to speak for himself, and he wasn’t convinced that it was his place to do so for him. But in the end Gaara saw no reason to lie about it. He’d made it plenty public in Kakashi’s office- would Kiba really care if other people knew too?

“Yeah. I think he does.” He paused before adding, “he shouldn’t, but he does.”

Sasuke’s eyes widened. He was surprised to hear those familiar words coming from Gaara when he had literally said the same thing about himself to Naruto mere hours ago.

Sasuke glanced over at said blonde and saw something shift in his eyes. He thought it too, he realized. I wonder what else he’s thinking.

Naruto anxiously chewed at his bottom lip, which Sasuke assumed was a response to what they had talked about earlier this morning. But, as it turned out, that wasn’t the case. No, Naruto wasn’t rehashing Sasuke’s same insecurities.

He was planning something.

After a while he finally released his bottom lip and reclaimed his voice. “Do you.. do you think Kiba would want to see you?”

Gaara sat up straight, his eyes fixed on the blonde, anticipation crawling up his throat. “Are you saying you can do that?”

“I can’t, but-”

“Naruto!” Sasuke tried to cut him off, but the blonde didn’t take the hint.

“-Sasuke can.”

Gaara’s eyes shot over to him, wide and filled with hope. “Is that true?”

“No. It’s not.”

“Sasuke-”

The raven turned to his hasty blonde, eyes narrowed. “You don’t know that that’s what Kiba wants” he snapped. “I’m not going to put him at this guy’s mercy based off a fucking guess.”

“It’s not a guess” Gaara said hurriedly. “We met in Kakashi’s office. He said he wants to be close, like how you two are. He wants the same thing. With me.”

Ok, so he didn’t exactly say it like that, Gaara admitted to himself. But it was easy to read between the lines.

Sasuke clearly didn’t believe a word he said, but Naruto seemed to. And if anyone could convince the mulish raven to back down, it was him.

“I’m not lying” Gaara went on, “and I won’t hurt him. I just want to see him.” He dropped his head. “It’s my fault he’s locked up in that room. I tried to convince them to let him leave, but they wouldn’t listen. I.. don’t like the thought of him being alone for this long.”

Dammit. Sasuke looked over at Naruto and immediately knew that Gaara had managed to sway him. And that he wasn’t about to let this go anytime soon.

“If I do this for them there’s a higher chance of us getting caught, Naruto” Sasuke said quietly, careful so that the orderlies wouldn’t overhear. “And if that happens, I won’t be able to see you like that anymore. Is it really worth it?”

Naruto hesitated, and they all saw it. He didn’t want to lose his private time with Sasuke, but he did want to do something for Kiba- to make up for all the times he had failed to be there for him before.

“I want to help them, Sasuke.”

The raven sighed, then turned his dark gaze back to Gaara. “Don’t get excited. I’m not doing this all the time for you two. One night- and you better not fuck it up. If you ruin my chances of meeting up with Naruto, I will kill you.”

“Sasuke!”

“I mean it” he said firmly. He narrowed his eyes at the redhead. “You know I mean it.”

Gaara raised a hand, a peace offering.

“I get it- I won’t fuck it up.” He glanced around, made sure the coast was clear, then whispered, “but can you really get me in to see him?”

“Possibly.”

“Tonight?”

“Maybe.” At the look on Naruto’s face he added, “it depends on who’s on duty.”

Sasuke wasn’t thrilled to check in his favor to help someone else, especially this asshole, but Naruto seemed deadset on exactly that. And he owed him one.

“What room are you in?”

“126.”

Sasuke nodded. “I can’t make any promises, but I’ll see what I can do. Any idea what room Kiba’s in?”

“I’ve seen him come out in the morning before. I think it’s 119.”

Naruto knew Sasuke wasn’t thrilled about doing this, especially since it would interfere with their time together, but he was happy that he was willing to do it anyways. And he wanted him to know that.

“Thank you, Sasuke” he said quietly.

“Don’t thank me yet” he muttered. “I still might change my mind.”

Naruto and Gaara fell silent at that, neither wanting to push him into backing out by saying the wrong thing.

Sasuke took that as a good sign that their conversation was finally over. He didn’t wait for the others to say as much. He simply rose to his feet, pulled Naruto up to join him, and shoved their chairs out of the way. Naruto looked like he wanted to protest, but Sasuke had no intention of giving him the chance. When he started to pull him away from the redhead, Naruto gave in and let him without a fight. At first. That is until something came to mind- something he should have thought to ask before.

“Wait!” Naruto dug his heels into the floor, forcing Sasuke to stop. He glanced over his shoulder and locked onto the redhead’s face. “What’s your name?”

At first it looked like he wasn’t going to answer. Naruto was about to ask again when he finally muttered his reply. “It’s Gaara.”

“Gaara” Naruto repeated. “I’m Naruto.” He gestured to the raven beside him. “And this is Sasuke.”

Gaara nodded but felt no need to repeat the names back the way Naruto did. Which was fine because Sasuke wasn’t interested in dragging this out any longer. He tightened his hold on his blonde and proceeded to pull him to the other side of the community room, back to where their chair patiently awaited their return.

“Bye Gaara” Naruto shouted back. “See you later.”

“..You’re not the one I hope to see later” Gaara said under his breath.

He stared after the two considering everything they had talked about, all that they disclosed. The chance that Naruto had dropped in his lap, the offer that Sasuke made- albeit reluctant as he was to do so. He couldn’t believe that those two had a way for him to get into Kiba’s room. And not just to see him, but to be completely alone with him.

It was more than he could have ever hoped for.

And it was all thanks to the two he had initially been so eager to get rid of. The ones who seemed so determined to invade his space, his privacy.

Truthfully, Gaara wasn’t a fan of it. He enjoyed making people feel uneasy, alarming them- seeing uncertainty turn to fear, watching how people who were once close would fade to the background, desperate to stay away from him. He liked being the cause of all of it- having control over it. There wasn’t room for much else in his life. At least, that’s how it used to be before a certain brunette changed everything. When he stole his attention, his affection.

His heart.

And now Gaara was willing to do anything to be with Kiba.

Anything.

Even if it meant making a couple of friends along the way.

Chapter Text

“Touch me. Remind me who I am.”

-Stanley Kunitz

--

Sasuke sighed as he ambled down the hall, a ring of keys silenced in his fist.

“This is fucking stupid” he muttered under his breath. “I should be with Naruto right now, but instead I’m out here with this asshole.”

Suffice to say, Sasuke was not pleased.

He didn’t bother to share his displeasure with the redhead walking along side him, but he was sure he was aware of it all the same. And that he probably heard his many complaints along the way.

Gaara didn’t comment. He knew better than to press his luck with the guy who clearly still despised him, the one he had no choice but to depend on. Truth be told, he wasn’t thrilled with their situation either, but he would do anything to see Kiba again.

And, as luck would have it, Naruto was on his side. He knew that that was the only reason Sasuke continued to lead them down the barren hall towards room 119, and he was truly grateful for it. So Gaara chose to keep his own irritation to himself- unwilling to risk having the temperamental raven change his mind.

Which Sasuke was very tempted to do.

But when he had slipped into Naruto’s room earlier his blonde had been adamant about him reuniting Gaara and Kiba, and he wasn’t in a position to refuse him. Sasuke had attempted to argue his point at first, had in fact gotten pretty heated about it, but the look on Naruto’s face changed that pretty quickly.

He couldn’t be selfish about this.

Not this time.

Naruto would never say as much, but Sasuke knew that he had already let him down countless times. Hell, he had failed him mere moments before seeing him tonight. Not to mention the fact that he was constantly aggressive with his blonde, often to the point of being all out hostile. And while he did regret it, he couldn’t completely guarantee that it wouldn’t happen again. He wanted to- and he tried, he really did- but Sasuke knew who he was. What he’s done.

What he was capable of doing again.

Naruto refused to give up on him, and Sasuke was desperate to keep him close, but he was bound to fuck things up again. He owed Naruto. And he knew he should act on it while he still had a stable enough mind to do so.

Ergo his trip to Gaara’s room.

And now, their short journey to Kiba’s.

“Even though the bastard doesn’t deserve it” he muttered.

Which Gaara continued to ignore.

Obsidian eyes hardened.

It’s his fucking fault that I was put in that situation in the first place…

--

It had happened maybe an hour ago. Possibly less. Before Sasuke had slipped through the shadows to get to room 126, and before he had found his way to his blonde’s room, he had been busy talking his way out of his own.

And then some.

The platinum blonde girl in charge of the patients tonight was one of the few he was ever able to persuade. It usually took a bit of flirting- though it always made him utterly nauseous to do it- a sly smile, a finger twirling the end of her long ponytail, and Ino was pudding in his palm.

At least, that’s usually how things went. And how it had started off this time too.

At first.

It didn’t take much to convince her to release him from his confinement tonight. In fact, she came to him- clearly eager for his attention. He gave her a charming, devilish smile when his door unlocked and made sure to brush against her as he stepped out- undoubtedly igniting her desire, enticing her fantasies. He didn’t want to think too much about that, but he couldn’t deny that it worked to his benefit. He knew that he would never be able to have his private, intimate moments with Naruto if it weren’t for this simpering skank. He supposed he did owe her his gratitude.

Sasuke breathed a thank you in her ear, promised that he would repay the favor- which he had absolutely no intention of ever doing- and reminded her that he preferred to be alone and unmonitored on his nightly strolls before turning to do just that.

Usually that was all it took, but tonight the girl was a bit more daring- much to Sasuke’s obvious irritation and displeasure. Or at least, obvious to him. Ino, on the otherhand, seemed to be utterly oblivious to it- too caught up in her own fantasies to see otherwise.

She rushed forward and grabbed hold of Sasuke’s wrist before he could get very far, halting his retreat. Sasuke turned his head to glare at the offending hand, then raised his dark eyes to the girl’s reddening face.

“I.. well, I just..”

She cleared her throat, struggling to find the nerve to say more.

Sasuke narrowed his eyes.

Ino tucked a bleached blonde strand behind her ear and lifted her pale blue eyes, gazing at him beneath long fluttering lashes. Hopelessly unaware of the lack of effect it had on him.

“I was hoping.. maybe we could…”

She let her voice trail off, sure that her message was plenty clear, far too embarrassed to say the rest. Especially with her crushes attention on her like this, his dark penetrating eyes cutting right through her. Her heart leapt in her chest, her bossom heaving from the sheer force of it. She bit her lip, desperate to entice him, hopeful to find his eyes trailing lower but far too nervous to meet them.

Sasuke clenched his jaw hard, forcing a vein to the surface. He didn’t want to have to do anything with any of these people, but he couldn’t lose his access to Naruto either.

Goddamnit.

Sasuke tried his best to hide his revulsion as he lifted the girl’s chin. He forced another wicked smile, though he was sure it didn’t reach his icy stare.

“Feeling impatient, are we?”

Ino’s blush deepened. “It’s hard not to when you look so…”

Her voice faded once more. Her eyes slid away in time to miss the flash of anger in Sasuke’s.

“Right..”

He leaned down and brought his lips close to her ear, his breath sending shivers through her entire body.

“But I like teasing you” he murmured.

Then he grasped her lobe between his teeth and bit down. Hard.

The girl gasped, equal parts startled, pained, and turned on by the gesture. She leaned in, pressing her voluptuous chest against him, hoping to entice more out of the mysterious raven-haired patient. Sasuke slipped a hand down her side and gripped her hip hard.

She winced and he couldn’t help but smirk.

He was tempted to hurt her more. To make her pay for putting him in this position in the first place. To hear her cry out, begging for him to show mercy that he was rarely inclined to give.

He wanted to break her- just not in the way she hoped.

Sasuke wrapped his arm around her waist and pulled her closer, letting her dream as he forced back the bile rising in the back of his throat. He grabbed a fistful of her ponytail and roughly jerked it back, sickened by the breathy moan falling from her lips.

He gave her a dark look, one that she completely misread.

“When I come for you, I promise- you won’t be expecting it.”

Ino inhaled sharply, and Sasuke knew he wouldn’t have to go much further. He found that a few aggressive touches, breathy growls, and a handful of lustful threats could get him pretty far with women. Luckily that applied to this one as well.

“S-Sasuke…”

He inwardly cringed.

“Don’t tempt me” he growled. “Or next time I’ll have to bend you over and take what I want.”

“Mmnn.. y-yes..”

Fucking whore.

Sasuke suddenly spun her around and roughly shoved her up against the wall. She yelped as he yanked her hair back again and stiffened as he stepped up close behind her.

“When I leave, I want you to go in the bathroom and touch yourself” he whispered. “And while your fingers are thrusting in and out over and over-”

Sasuke pressed closer. He could feel her shudder against him, and the way his body didn’t respond to any of it.

“-think of me.”

Then he stepped back and, without another word or second glance, he walked away.

And this time Ino let him.

When she was finally able to catch her breath and collect herself, Ino pushed herself off the wall. She readjusted her clothes and walked the opposite direction on unsteady legs, suddenly desperate to find the nearest bathroom.

To do as she was told.

--

Sasuke dragged his fingers through his hair, trying to compose himself before entering Naruto’s room. He usually didn’t have to go that far with the orderlies to get keys, and it bothered him immensely that he had to this time.

He felt.. dirty, truly repulsed by his actions. And he was terrified that Naruto would feel the same way. That he would be revolted by him. That he would want nothing to do with him after this.

I have to tell him.

He didn’t want to- God, he really didn’t want to- but it was wrong to keep it from him. They never said as much, but Sasuke knew that their relationship was exclusive. And that’s how he wanted it.

He had no intention of ever sharing Naruto with anyone, and he was sure that his blonde felt the same way. He was new to all of this after all, clearly not the promiscuous type. And Sasuke was sure that he expected the same from him.

As he should.

Sasuke knew that if their roles were reversed, if he found out that Naruto was all over some skank for his benefit, he’d be fucking livid. He couldn’t imagine feeling any other way. The last thing he ever wanted to do was upset Naruto like that, and now it was too late to change it.

Fuck..

Sasuke’s anxiety spiked with that realization and stayed put as he unlocked his boyfriend’s door.

Naruto sat up in bed at the sound of the lock turning, his pulse growing rapid at the thought of seeing Sasuke again. He blinked back the sleep from his eyes, his wide blues adjusting to the dim light, as Sasuke stepped inside.

Naruto could feel the corner of his mouth turn up slightly- a hint of a smile. That is until his mind cleared, and he remembered why he hadn’t been expecting him.

“Sasuke?” He tilted his head slightly, a confused look in his eyes. “I thought you’d be with Gaara.”

“I need to talk to you.”

“But-”

Sasuke quietly closed the door behind him and stepped further into the room. “Naruto, please. It’s important.”

Naruto nodded, though he had yet to understand the look on Sasuke’s face, the hint of fear and trepidation in his eyes. He was silent as he waited for him to speak, his stare fixed on his raven as he joined him on the bed.

Sasuke anxiously twisted his hands together, not sure how to begin. He wanted nothing more than to place them on his blonde, but he knew that he couldn’t. He didn’t deserve to. Not after what he had done.

Naruto noticed his restlessness and gently placed a hand over his jittery fingers.

“What’s wrong?”

Sasuke took a deep breath. “I did something….” he said quietly. “Something I shouldn’t have.”

Naruto tilted his head further, hoping to get a better look at Sasuke’s face as he spoke. He could make out his tight frown, his pained eyes, and his own anxiety spiked with it. He had never seen him like this before, and he wasn’t sure what to think now that he did.

“What-” He swallowed. “What did you do?”

Sasuke hardened his nerves, his resolve, and finally turned to face him. To face what he had done.

“I have to flirt with people to get keys to your room” he admitted.

Naruto didn’t look at all surprised by this.

“I.. kind of assumed.”

Sasuke worried at his bottom lip before adding, “and I.. I had to go further with it this time.”

Naruto’s usually expressionless face suddenly looked stricken- a look that sent daggers through Sasuke’s heart.

“How much further?” he forced himself to ask- though honestly he was afraid to hear his answer.

Sasuke told him everything- from biting her ear and grabbing her waist, to pushing her against the wall and pressing close. He even told him what he had said to her before he left, though the truth on his tongue felt nothing short of repugnant.

He had looked away for most of it, unable to face the disgust, the hate, he’d undoubtably find in Naruto’s eyes. He could barely stomach admitting the truth himself, he wasn’t sure he could handle seeing that same disgust reflecting back at him. When he did finally look up again, he found that same signature stare but there was no sign of the hate he expected to find in it.

Sasuke blinked.

“Aren’t you upset with me?”

Naruto took his hand, holding it tightly in his own. “I’m sorry” he said softly, his voice filled with nothing but pity.

Sasuke jerked his hand away from the absurdity of that, anger rushing through him. “You’re sorry?! Are you fucking kidding me?”

Naruto looked at him with the utmost sincerity, with those same saddened blues.

It only made him feel worse.

“You should never have been put in that situation” Naruto said, surprised that he was able to find the words that were usually out of reach- that were often so difficult for him to find. “It makes me feel.. sad for you” he went on. “Because you felt like you didn’t have a choice.”

Sasuke glared at the blonde, rage burning in his charcoal eyes. “I don’t want your pity, Naruto. And I don’t fucking deserve it! You should be angry!”

He realized he was getting too loud and quickly dropped his voice to a harsh whisper instead, unable to keep his own anger at bay. “I touched someone else- how the fuck can you be ok with that?”

Naruto furrowed his brows. “Did you want to?”

“Of course not!” he snapped, irritated that he would ask such a question.

“Then why would I be mad at you?”

“Because it still happened!”

“And I’m sorry it did.”

Sasuke growled, a deep venomous sound- Naruto’s only warning. He suddenly sprang towards him, tackling him to the bed with brute force. Naruto yelped in surprise, which Sasuke ignored, too enraged to care. He dropped a hand to either side of his face, long ebony strands falling towards him as he glared down.

“Do NOT forgive me for this” he snarled.

Sasuke was still pissed, of course he was pissed, but he found himself becoming increasingly more distracted by his face. Being angry didn’t stop him from wanting him- from being turned on seeing him confused and vulnerable like that.

Sasuke dropped down on his forearms, pressing his core firmly against Naruto’s, hearing his breath hitch at the sudden contact, the sudden heat.

Despite his insistence that Naruto should be infuriated with him, he just couldn’t resist going further. He slipped one hand between them and moved it under Naruto’s shirt, dragging calloused fingers across his middle, relishing in the feel of him trembling against his palm.

“I want these hands to touch you.” Sasuke grabbed Naruto’s hip hard and jerked it towards him with bruising force. “Only you.”

“I want that too” Naruto breathed.

“Then fucking act like it! Be pissed off when they’re not!”

Naruto was quiet for a moment, searching for the right words and struggling to put them in the right order. After a while he finally managed to find them, organize them. He studied his raven as he spoke.

“Don’t do something you don’t want to do, Sasuke. Not for me. Not for anyone.”

“And if I can’t get the keys? If these visits stop? Then what?”

“We’ll find another way.”

Sasuke shook his head. “There is no other way.”

Naruto opened his mouth to argue with him, but he never got the chance. Sasuke shoved his lips against his own, sealing every pointless reassurance and groundless promise between them. He devoured his mouth with an insatiable hunger- one that echoed through his entire being and overwhelmed the blonde beneath him.

Sasuke rolled his hips as his hand dipped lower, slipping under Naruto’s clothes. He grabbed his bare ass and squeezed hard.

“Nngh!”

Naruto yelped against his mouth, but Sasuke didn’t stop. He palmed his firm backside, forcing it closer as he ground into him. Naruto soon warmed up to his touch and thrust back against him, moving against his pulsing erection and the hand still latched onto his ass.

Sasuke groaned, sinking his tongue deep inside as he shifted his fingers, tempted to do the same behind him. He brought the tip of one digit to that delicious little hole, the one he constantly craved the chance to explore.

Naruto stiffened, alarmed by his brazenness. He tried to shake his head, but Sasuke grabbed it with his free hand and forced it to stop, ignoring his protest. Cerulean eyes shot open and stared up at him, fear flickering in their depths.

“Mnph!”

After a while Sasuke finally released his lips, but he was far more reluctant to part with his ass.

“We have plenty of lotion, you know.”

Naruto swallowed hard. “I- I’m not ready.”

“I can help with that.”

“You said you would bring Gaara to see Kiba” Naruto said hurriedly.

Sasuke dropped his head and groaned against his shoulder. “Please tell me you’re joking.”

He prodded a little harder against Naruto’s hole, and his blonde violently flinched against him.

“I-I’m not joking.”

“You would rather send me off to help that fucking asshole than be with me.”

Naruto flinched again, alarmed by the anger in his voice, the hand that still had yet to stop. “I.. want to help them.”

“How about helping me first.”

Sasuke thrust against him with more ferocity, anger fueling his lust, driving him to be even more aggressive. He could feel Naruto tense beneath him, but he didn’t want to stop. He didn’t want to ignore his needs to help some bastard who didn’t deserve it. Especially knowing that Naruto had determined that he “wasn’t a bad guy” when Sasuke so clearly was.

Why should he yield their intimate time together so some other prick could get his?

But Naruto had stopped moving with him, and Sasuke didn’t want to do this without him. He wouldn’t scare him, wouldn’t force him, despite that dark itch in the far recesses of his mind that reminded him that he could.

And that for a while it would feel really fucking good if he did.

Sasuke shook his head.

No. That’s not you. Not anymore.

Not with him.

The raven forced himself to stop and brought his head back up to glower down at his perpetual tease.

“Is this you getting back at me for what I did?”

Naruto shook his head, but Sasuke wasn’t convinced. Because he knew this was the least he deserved.

With a heavy dejected sigh Sasuke removed his wandering hand and sat up. He rose to his feet, adjusted his erection, and turned back to face his blonde.

“Fine. But I’m coming back afterwards.”

A hint of mirth flickered through the hostility, gleaming in his obsidian eyes.

“And if you’re asleep when I get back, I’m just going to get started without you.”

Naruto’s brows drew close. “Meaning?”

“I’ll make sure you have something fun to wake up to.”

Naruto gave him a nervous look, one that Sasuke thoroughly enjoyed.

“In fact, Naruto-”

Sasuke gave his innocent blonde an appraising look. He licked his lips.

“-don’t wait up.”

--

Sasuke wasn’t happy to leave, but he was well aware that he didn’t have a choice. Naruto was insistent, and Sasuke’s control was waning fast. If he didn’t get out of there now he would probably end up doing something he’d regret.

It was with that last thought that Sasuke finally left Naruto’s room, locking the door behind him.

He dragged his fingers through his hair, forcing back his irritation along with it. It wasn’t completely effective, but he did manage to regain some of his composure. Enough to get him moving down the corridor once more, making his way to room 126.

When he stopped in front the right door, he made the decision not to make his presence known before entering. If the redhead wasn’t ready for him, that was his problem. In fact, he could use a bit of entertainment after the night he’s had.

A dark part of him hoped to find the guy in an embarrassing state- that he would get to see his face burn with humiliation, horrified to be seen that way. That he would find Gaara doing something he’d be able to cruelly rub his face in whenever he wanted. That the cocky ginger would be flustered, horrified, with his fist in his asshole or something just as equally embarrassing.

But no such luck.

When Sasuke slipped a key in the door, clicked over the lock, and made his way inside he didn’t find Gaara mewling and masturbating- he wasn’t even asleep. He was simply sitting on his bed, his back pressed against the wall, seemingly deep in thought. He didn’t react when his door opened, as if he had always expected it. As if he had nothing to fear from it.

His lack of fear pissed Sasuke off to no end.

“Are you coming or what?” he snapped.

Gaara needed no further invitation.

He quickly rose to his feet, padded across his room, and soundlessly stepped out into the hallway. He didn’t ask questions- in fact, he barely spared the raven a glance. He was wholly focused on the corridor before them, and the destination it’d lead him to. To the person he was desperate to see again.

He could hear Sasuke grumbling angrily under his breath but thought nothing of it. He knew how the guy felt about him and, honestly, he expected nothing less.

Hate me all you want, asshole. As long as you get me to Kiba, I could fucking care a less.

Gaara had no desire to convince the guy to be his friend. He didn’t even need to be cordial to him. All Gaara cared about was that the blonde that Sasuke constantly clung to had managed to persuade him to help. That he was going to see Kiba again.

Privately.

Nothing else mattered to him.

Nothing.

--

Kiba turned his head at the sound of metal shifting- a sound he knew well. Someone was looking in his room through the small panel on the door. He saw a set of dark eyes peering in to look at him before the panel was closed once more.

Kiba pushed himself up in bed, brows furrowed in confusion. He wasn’t certain of the exact time, but he was sure that there were still several hours left before dawn made its appearance. He’s been careful to keep his behavior in check, to do as he was told. In fact, he has been completely silent for days- there shouldn’t be any reason for someone to come to his room. Especially now.

Kiba slowly dropped his feet to the floor, prepared to spring from the bed if he had to. Something about this was off, and he wasn’t one to ignore his instincts. He took a deep breath as the door opened and held it as a figure encased in shadow made his way inside. It took a moment for the small nightlight in the corner of his room to illuminate enough of the man’s features for him to identify him. And when it did, he was even more perplexed.

“Sasuke..?”

The raven pressed a finger to his lips, and Kiba dropped his voice to a barely audible whisper.

“What are you doing here?”

“I brought someone who wants to see you” Sasuke replied. “But first I need to know that you’re ok being alone with him.”

Kiba’s brow lifted higher.

Someone who wants to be alone with me?

Cinnamon eyes widened.

Wait. Is he talking about-

Sasuke shifted to the side and glanced down the barren hall, allowing his fellow deviant to step into the room. Kiba leapt to his feet as soon as he saw that shock of red hair, those pale jade eyes.

“Gaara.”

He rushed over to him without hesitation and immediately threw himself into his arms.

Gaara wrapped his arms around him tight, holding him close as he murmured his name against his neck. He slid a hand up his back and buried it in thick chestnut locks as they embraced, and Kiba leaned into his touch, eager to be closer.

Sasuke eyed the two, momentarily surprised to see Kiba react that way. He had expected to find him horrified by Gaara’s unwarranted visit, to have to drag the redhead out of his room and beat the shit out of him for the sheer audacity of ever stepping into it.

In fact, he had been looking forward to it. But it looked like he wouldn’t have the chance.

“I’ll be back in a few hours” he muttered.

Gaara nodded, acknowledging the raven without interrupting his intimate reunion.

Sasuke turned away from the two and walked out of the room, locking the soon-to-be-lovers inside. Then he headed back to Naruto’s room, hopeful to be just as intimate with his own.

Even if he didn’t deserve to.

Chapter Text

“Every lover is, in his heart, a madman, and, in his head, a minstrel.”

-Neil Gaiman

--

Gaara tucked his fingers in Kiba’s unruly chestnut hair, cradling his face with all the tenderness and love his calloused hands could carry. He wasn’t a gentle man- usually just didn’t care enough to try. But he did this time.

He wouldn’t hurt Kiba.

Nothing would.

Kiba covered his hands with his own and smiled up at him, momentarily losing himself in jade eyes that suddenly held so much warmth. More than he had ever seen there before. He was curious about it- about everything he’s seen change in Gaara- and he was tempted to ask when another thought occurred to him. One that felt far more pressing considering where they were both standing at the moment.

Kiba furrowed his brows in confusion. “I don’t understand” he murmured. “How are you here?”

“I’m guessing Uchiha had a few favors to cash in” Gaara said offhandedly, not bothering to hide his ridicule or disgust towards the guy.

Kiba’s stare widened. “You think he...”

He let his voice fade out, then shook his head. “No, he wouldn’t do that to Naruto.”

Kiba had seen the way those two were with each other. He could see Naruto’s interest in Sasuke by the way he responded to him, in the slight smiles that would light up his otherwise expressionless face and the countless hours that they spent squeezed together in that raggedy orange chair. Naruto was clearly infatuated with the guy, but that was nothing compared to what he saw from Sasuke.

The guy couldn’t keep his hand off of Naruto. And if it went unchecked, Kiba had no doubt that those hands would go a hell of a lot further than they’d ventured already.

Sasuke’s eyes tracked Naruto’s every movement, studied every reaction, and- when Naruto wasn’t looking directly at him- practically devoured every solitary inch of his body. He stared at him with a hunger that Kiba found a bit unnerving, but it didn’t appear to faze Naruto at all. At least, not as far as he could tell.

But there was more to it than that.

Sasuke actually tried with Naruto. He tended to him, fought to control his anger for him, rose to his defense and anticipated his needs. Someone that devoted, that attentive to their person.. he just couldn’t believe that Sasuke would betray him like that.

Besides, Kiba has seen what he’s like with everyone else. Simply put, the guy despised people. Sasuke clearly had no interest in anyone but Naruto. Sure, he may be a bit obsessive, but his loyalty was definitely there- indisputably.

“I can’t see Sasuke doing that to him” Kiba repeated, even more certain now that he thought about it.

Gaara shrugged. “People can surprise you.”

“Yeah.. they can.”

Gaara could see the question in Kiba’s eyes, the desire to understand- to know what had changed, why he had changed- but he didn’t know how to answer.

Honestly, he wasn’t completely sure himself.

He’d originally approached Kiba merely as a means of entertainment. He wanted to startle him. To see fear fill those big brown eyes, to watch him tremble every time he got too close. Gaara had simply wanted a distraction. He wanted to be hated knowing he deserved it. To have control over something he didn’t before.

To put it frankly, he just wanted to fuck with the guy.

But Kiba turned out to be different from what he expected. He called Gaara out on his shit, challenged him even when he managed to spark a bit of fear in him. And, despite all of that, he’d responded to Gaara’s advances. He had kissed the corner of his mouth, revealed his inner most thoughts..

Kiba seemed to understand every move he made - even before Gaara knew it himself. And if that wasn’t surprising enough, there was a gentleness he didn’t expend to find there, one Gaara didn’t feel he deserved. One he couldn’t help but want more of.

Kiba’s soft side intrigued him, kept him coming back. And then seeing his darker side break free and transform him like that…

Hell, it was love at first bite.

“I never intended on feeling this way…” Gaara spoke slowly- the words foreign on his tongue. This was all incredibly new for him. He didn’t want to say the wrong thing.

He dragged a hand through unkempt crimson strands, forcing back his nervousness with it. “Honestly, I’ve never felt this way about anyone before.”

All of his past experiences had been brief, insignificant- just a way to get off and pass the time, nothing more. No one before Kiba had ever meant anything to him.

And he found himself hoping there wouldn’t be anyone after.

“I want something real with you, Kiba. Something that lasts.” He sighed. “I know that I don’t deserve it, but-”

Without warning, Kiba grabbed him by the collar of his shirt and wrenched him forward. Gaara blinked and suddenly his lips were on him, sure and hot and utterly consuming. Gaara immediately wrapped his arms around him and kissed him back, passion and desire burning through his body, his mind. He was eager to do a hell of a lot more, but Kiba pulled away before he could get very far.

Gaara gave him a disappointed look, one that the brunette couldn’t help but smile at.

“Don’t give me that look.”

“You started this” Gaara grumbled.

“To shut you up.”

Gaara frown turned to a sly smile. He tightened his hold on his brunette and pulled, slowly reeling him back in.

“Then how about shutting me up again, hmm?”

Kiba clapped a hand over his smirk, silencing him once more. His expression suddenly grew serious, and Gaara paused to let him speak.

“I don’t like when you talk about yourself like that.” Kiba kept his eyes on him, his hand pressed firmly to his lips. “Because I want something real with you too.”

Gaara grabbed his wrist and forced it down. “Do you really mean that?”

“Isn’t it obvious?”

Gaara looked away. “I feel like I should be pushing you away.” He meant it, he did, and yet he couldn’t help but pull him closer with every word. “But I don’t want to.”

“You don’t need to push me away.”

Cinnamon eyes studied his face then flitted down to the bandage around his neck, stark white against smooth pale skin. He frowned at it and took his bottom lip between his teeth, worrying at the tender flesh.

Much to Gaara’s displeasure.

He reached up and pushed his thumb against Kiba’s lip, freeing it from teeth he knew all too well.

“Don’t do that” he said firmly.

Kiba noticed the look on his face, the concern, and dropped his eyes from it.

“It doesn’t hurt, Gaara.”

“Your ancestors gave you some pretty sharp fangs, Kiba.” His eyes lowered. “And those lips are mine. I won’t let you risk it.”

Kiba shifted his gaze back to Gaara’s neck. “I’m sorry” he said quietly. “I can’t believe I did that to you..”

Gaara’s eyes hardened. “Don’t. I don’t want an apology from you.”

“Gaara-”

“I wouldn’t come to you like this for an apology, Kiba. I don’t need one. And I don’t want one.”

The brunette gave him a searching look. “Then what do you want?”

Gaara gave him a devilish smile, one that brought life to his eyes. Kiba liked seeing it there.

“I’m glad you asked.”

Gaara tangled his fingers in soft brown hair and pulled Kiba closer, gently tilting his head to the side as he drew him in. He paused when there was less than an inch between them.

“If you don’t want me to kiss you” he murmured, “stop me now.”

Kiba’s breath hitched. When he finally did find his voice, it came out as a whisper- one that Gaara felt down to his core. Words that slammed into his heart and echoed through his entire being. Words he would never forget.

“I’m not stopping you.”

Gaara’s expression darkened, just for a moment but it was there. Before Kiba could make sense of it, question it, his mouth was on him and everything else faded to the background.

Gaara leaned down as he wrapped powerful arms around Kiba’s narrow waist then straightened with him pressed close, forcing him to the tips of his toes. The redhead swayed slightly as their kiss deepened, moving to the sound of their hearts beating in synchrony and the soft hum of a memory- an echo of a song he once knew, one that Kiba’s taste, his scent, the feel of him in his arms, instantly brought back. Until Kiba was almost certain that he heard it too. He moved with him, against him, igniting a heat neither of them could ignore.

Gaara stumbled forward, forcing Kiba back until his legs hit the edge of the bed. Gaara kept a firm hand on his back, bracing him as he lowered his brunette onto it, careful not to end their passionate kiss in the process. Kiba clung to him, just as unwilling to let anything force them apart, and just as eager to pull him onto the bed with him.

Gaara smiled against his lips as he shifted between his legs, giving himself better access to every beautiful terrible thing he wanted to do to him. He slipped a hand between them and impatiently shoved their pajama pants down their thighs, leaving nothing but thin boxer briefs between them. Even that felt like too much, but it was a start.

He dragged his fingertips across every part he left exposed feeling the heat radiating off of Kiba, and the way he shivered despite it.

It excited him to no end.

Gaara lowered himself between Kiba’s trembling thighs and roughly thrust against him, making sure that his brunette could feel every swollen inch of his desire. Kiba mewled beneath him and arched his hips, practically begging for more.

And Gaara gave him exactly what he wanted.

He took Kiba’s hips in his large powerful hands and gripped them tight as he rolled against him, groaning as he moved with him. Gaara slipped away from his lips and tasted his way down his jawline, his neck, across his exposed collarbone- eager for Kiba’s enticing scent to coat his tongue. To be completely consumed by it.

Kiba moaned as Gaara explored- a sound that reverberated through his entire body, echoing in his groin and curling in his toes. Gaara shoved his shirt up, revealing more for him to taste as Kiba’s fingers dove into his hair and gripped it hard.

Gaara groaned against his stomach.

“Mnnhn..” He lifted his head and found half-lidded pools staring back at him. Gaara licked his lips.

“Do you have any idea how sexy you look right now?”

He watched Kiba’s lips part, his face redden, and felt his length pulse with want at the sight of it. Kiba tried to speak but his voice came out breathy and disjointed, and he quickly gave up on it. But Gaara couldn’t just leave it be. He loved the sounds he made. Seeing his little brunette breathless and shy like this- he wanted to hear him.

Gaara gripped his waist hard and jerked him down, smirking as Kiba gasped in surprise.

“Don’t hide your voice from me.”

Gaara dragged his tongue up Kiba’s stomach, his chest, then found his lips again, tasting the moan lingering inside.

Their tongues tangled for dominance and Gaara slipped his hand between them again, this time to shove away the rest of their clothes. He could feel Kiba shiver the second he pulled his boxers down, but he didn’t protest any of it. In fact, his hands reached for Gaara’s at the same time.

Gaara pulled away just long enough to discard their clothing completely, then knelt over his brunette to get a good look at him. He slowly dragged his pale jade eyes over Kiba’s blushing face and down his tantalizing frame, drinking in the sight of him.

“You’re staring.”

Gaara quirked a brow. “Can you really blame me?”

Kiba gave him a bashful look. He tried to cover himself, but Gaara was having none of it. He took his wrists in his hands and shoved them down on the bed.

Kiba glanced over at one restrained hand, then up at the man hovering over him. “How far do you want this to go?”

“A lot farther than I should.”

Kiba was quiet for a moment, considering him. Then he took a deep breath and held it until he finally found his frazzled nerve.

“I want you, Gaara.” Those big brown eyes slipped lower, taking in the redhead’s massive erection, before adding, “I want all of you.”

The grip on his wrists tightened, and Gaara’s eyes flashed with a heat that was both exhilarating and terrifying- one that promised both pleasure and pain.

It didn’t make Kiba want him any less.

“Are you sure?”

The brunette leaned in, and the hands on him finally loosened. He tangled his fingers in Gaara’s hair again and brought their lips close.

“I’m sure.”

Kiba pulled him in for another heated embrace, and once again ended it far too quickly. Gaara’s irritation turned to confusion when Kiba pushed him back and abruptly turned away from him.

“Kiba? Are you ok?”

The brunette quietly reached into his bedside drawer, pulled out a bottle, then shoved it into Gaara’s hands.

“I will be.”

Gaara looked down at the bottle of lotion in his hand briefly, then shifted his gaze back to his brunette. He watched as Kiba wordlessly turned around beneath him- dropping down onto his stomach to put his backside on full display.

Gaara dragged his teeth across his bottom lip as he gave Kiba’s ass an appraising look. He palmed one plump cheek and gave it a firm squeeze, barely suppressing a moan when Kiba pushed back against his hand, offering him access to so much more.

Gaara was tempted.

Tempted to wrench Kiba’s hips back and slam into that tight little hole. To force him down and fuck him hard, his thrusts brutal and relentless as Kiba shrieked beneath him.

He was tempted, but he wouldn’t.

At least.. not for their first time.

Gaara grabbed Kiba’s waist and turned him onto his back, his touch sure but gentle.

Wide cinnamon eyes stared up at him, confused. “Why?”

Gaara dropped down on his forearms to once again cradle his soon to be lover’s beautiful face in his hands.

“I want to look at you.”

Kiba felt heat rise up his throat and redden his cheeks all over again. “You do..?”

Gaara smiled. “Yeah.”

He opened the bottle with one hand and carefully coated two fingers as he spoke, keeping Kiba’s eyes locked onto his own.

“I like seeing you like this. So don’t hold back.”

His brows furrowed. “Hold back?”

“Your expressions. Your voice..” Gaara licked his lips. “I want all of it.”

He could tell that he was starting to make Kiba nervous and, honestly, he was enjoying every second of it.

“If we’re too loud someone will come in here” Kiba pointed out.

“I’ll keep you quiet when I need to.”

He gave him a wicked smile.

“Like this.”

Then Gaara kissed him hard and forced a finger deep inside.

--

Sasuke knew something was wrong well before he made it back to Naruto’s room. He could just sense it- a shift in the universe, a flicker of doubt that soon morphed to all out dread.

Something was definitely wrong.

And whatever it was, Naruto was at the center of it.

Sasuke quickened his pace, hoping that he was wrong about this. That he was just being paranoid. That Naruto was fine.

Already knowing in his heart that he wasn’t.

--

Gaara tried to take his time preparing his brunette’s tight hole for what comes next, but his control was waning. If he didn’t do something about it now, he really would get too rough with him- and he couldn’t do that.

He was about to tell him, had the words lined up and ready, but Kiba surprised him yet again and beat him to it.

“G-Gaara, please.. now.”

Gaara wasted no time doing as he was told. He forced Kiba’s leg up, lined up the tip of his cock against his now dripping hole, and slowly pushed his length inside.

A sharp gasp tore out of Kiba as Gaara pushed himself deeper, sheathing himself in his heat.

“Nnnhn.. a-ahh, w-wait..”

Gaara groaned as Kiba clenched down hard around him, his pained pleas filling the meager space between them.

“F-fuck..”

Gaara bit his lip hard and pulsed his hips, his movements slight, ever so slight, but still forcing his thick cock deeper.

Kiba trembled. “G-Gaara..”

God, his voice.. The way he says my name like that.

He groaned. “I’m sorry. I can’t.”

Gaara grabbed him hard and forced the rest of his length inside.

Kiba’s eyes shot open as he cried out, and Gaara quickly slammed a hand over his mouth to keep him quiet.

The redhead clenched his jaw hard, forcing a vein to the surface, as Kiba shuddered against him. The tears in his big brown eyes, the pain and pleasure flashing in their depths, it was driving him mad. He wanted to caress and love him just as badly as he wanted to fucking ruin him.

Gaara kept his hand over his mouth as he pulled his hips back and slammed his cock into him, cutting off another piercing cry.

“Mmnhn!!”

Gaara couldn’t stop.

His mind was being consumed by the feel of Kiba flinching beneath him, his hole twitching around him, his hands on his arm, gripping him tight. All the need and desire flowing through him, it had become too much. He couldn’t hold back.

Gaara rammed into him, over and over and over, losing himself with every thrust, every stifled scream. He had wanted so badly to be gentle with Kiba, to do everything right by him, but now..

He was terrified that he had completely and irrevocably fucked everything up- even as his thrusts became more violent, ruthless. In fact, he was sure that he had. That is until he felt Kiba’s legs wrap around him, felt his waist lift against him, his ass bouncing back to meet every brutal thrust with one of his own.

Tears still streaked down his face, cries still crashed against his palm, shattering in Kiba’s throat, but Gaara saw pleasure there too. Kiba didn’t hate it, didn’t hate him.

Gaara slowly pulled his hand away from his lips to kiss him and was relieved when Kiba grabbed his head and forced it lower.

When he kissed him back.

Gaara pulled back to hear his moans, his throaty gasps when he got a little too rough again. To kiss away his tears and murmur sweet words until they stopped flowing altogether.

To tell him to be a good boy and cum for him.

And to watch with utmost satisfaction as his beautiful little brunette did exactly as he was told.

--

When Sasuke had told Naruto what happened with the orderly, how he had gotten access to his room tonight, Naruto meant what he said. It really did sadden him that Sasuke had been put in that position, and that he felt forced to act on it.

Naruto was honest about his feelings. Truly. But something changed when Sasuke left his room, and Naruto couldn’t explain it.

Initially he just felt something heavy settle over him, something dark- something akin to fear. Doubt. It was like convincing yourself there was nothing in your closet before bed but never actually getting around to checking first. He couldn’t shake the feeling that there was a monster that he was ignoring- a nightmare that still held a way to infect his mind.

And that’s exactly what it did.

It didn’t take long for Naruto’s insecurities to fester into something else entirely, something he could no longer ignore. He could hear them- whispers, harsh and razor sharp, all speaking at once. He didn’t recognize their voices, but he caught most of the the words the collective shot into his head. It ricocheted around his skull, like bullets shot in a sealed safe- what had once been safe.

He doesn’t want you. He wants her. You’re just a cheap replacement. He uses you while he waits. Because you don’t say no.

You’re disgusting.

You’re nothing.

Someone like that could never want someone like you.

You’re nothing.

Nothing.

Naruto shot to his feet and paced his room as the voices continued to assault him, as he murmured quiet pleas for them to stop.

“Please, please just leave me alone.”

You’re nothing.

“S-stop.. please.”

You were never the one he wanted.

“No” he choked, “th-that’s not true.”

You know what kind of people want you.

Naruto touched the scars on his cheek, simultaneously forcing back the memories that threatened to resurface- the people he was desperate to forget.

“That was different..” he said quietly, but the words rang false, and the voices heard it.

Is it? Do you really think someone like Sasuke would want someone like you?

“I-”

He wanted to say that they were wrong, to shout at every insecurity ringing in his skull until the voices nothing more than weak murmurs in the back of his mind, but…

Maybe they’re right.

The voices, those cruel whispers trapped in his head, suddenly poured out of him. Dark, shadowy wisps that fell from his mouth, his tears glands, his pores, billowing out from his body in one violent wave. They spun around the room, but there were too many and they collided with each other, absorbed each other, until they were but one collective mass. A dark entity that he was far too weak to withstand.

Naruto stumbled back and hit the wall hard.

“It isn’t real” he breathed. “It isn’t real.” You know it isn’t real.

The voices heard him.

And they weren’t happy.

Naruto flinched as those swirls of doubt, the poison from his mind, shifted closer. He knew they meant to devour him, to overwhelm him just like they did all the others. Just one more voice to drown in the masses, one more life to snuff out in the dark.

Naruto shuddered as they closed in. His eyes darted around the room, desperate to find an escape, but there was nothing. Nothing but the emptiness and the dark. The voices and his own fleeting pleas.

The shadows towered over him, and suddenly the voices grew several octaves, their screams piercing. Naruto’s huge blue eyes filled with terror and his knees gave out under the onslaught. He slid down the wall, staring up at the monstrosity of his own making. He hit the floor and pulled tight against the wall, and when the shadows, those voices, came for him he screamed.

The shadows screamed louder, a cacophony of angry nameless voices shrieking in his mind over and over.

He doesn’t want you! He could NEVER want you! You’re fucking nothing!!

Naruto gripped fistfuls of his hair, desperate to relieve the pressure in his skull. There were just too many voices slamming back inside. He couldn’t breathe.

“N-no” he whimpered. “That’s not true.”

“Naruto?”

Sasuke slowly stepped across the room, his hand out as he took a knee in front of him. “Naruto, hey, what’s wrong? What happened?”

“Doesn’t want me. Doesn’t want me. Doesn’t want me.” Naruto muttered it over and over, shaking his head as his hands gripped his blonde locks in tight fists.

He turned away, but Sasuke grabbed his chin and forced him to face him. He tried to get him to answer but it was like he didn’t see him at all. Wide blues looked past him, and he-

He looks terrified.

What the hell is going on? What is he talking about?

Sasuke grabbed his shoulder hard and shook him.

“Dammit, Naruto. Come on, look at me. Please, just look at me. Tell me what’s going on with you.”

“No.. no, no, no, no-”

“Naruto-”

The blonde suddenly threw his head back and screamed. Sasuke flinched back, alarmed by his sudden outburst. He quickly forced a hand over his mouth to silence him, but it just made things worse.

Naruto shook violently against him, tears falling down his face as he shrieked against his palm. Sasuke tried to smooth back his hair, to calm him, but Naruto just slapped it away. He bashed his head back against the wall over and over, forcing Sasuke to free his mouth to save his skull.

“Dammit, Naruto. Snap out of it!”

“No, no, no- NO!!”

Sasuke tried to silence him again, but it was too late. He could hear footsteps rushing towards them from the adjacent corridor. The other orderlies- they must have heard him, and they weren’t willing to wait for Ino to call it in.

And they were closing in fast.

Sasuke looked over his shoulder at the door, which was of course unlocked, then back to the hysterical blonde in his grasp.

Goddamnit. What the fuck do I do?

He couldn’t be caught in Naruto’s room like this. They would find out what he’s been doing and have him shipped off to some other asylum. He would never be able to see Naruto again.

He couldn’t let that happen.

I won’t let them separate us. Not now.

Not ever.

The steps were close.

Time was up.

Sasuke quickly jerked Naruto close and pressed a kiss to his temple as he murmured into his hair. “Fuck, Naruto, I’m sorry..”

He reluctantly let his blonde go and crawled under the bed. He ripped his blanket halfway off the bed, letting it drape in front of him and hopefully conceal him from view.

Which meant he couldn’t see out either.

Sasuke could hear Naruto screaming- the sheer terror in his voice, the pain in his broken cries. It tore at him. He wanted to make it stop, to help him. He couldn’t stand how helpless he was to do anything.

I’m sorry.

Sasuke could hear a key hurriedly jammed into the lock, metal scraping against metal. They must have been too distracted by Naruto’s screams to notice that it never clicked over. The door flew open, and orderlies rushed inside- two or three of them by the sounds of it.

Sasuke held his breath as they drew close, knowing it wouldn’t take much for them to discover him. For him to ruin everything.

“Got a syringe ready?” he heard one of them ask.

“Yeah, just hold him down. I can’t get a vein.”

“Ino! Get the fuck in here!”

Sasuke tensed.

And Naruto’s screams grew far worse as she stepped into the room. Sasuke could hear a couple other people join the others, could hear them bark orders at each other, and then he heard them force Naruto to the floor.

It sickened him. And it took everything in him not to lunge out from under the bed and bash in the skull of every bastard who dared to put a hand on him. The raven gripped his fists hard and bit down on his lip, doing his best to force back his impulsive rage.

Naruto’s fearful cries shattered into a heavy sob and Sasuke pressed his forehead against the floor, choking back his own.

Naruto..

It wasn’t long before all of his sounds fell silent. Sasuke heard a thump as his body fell limp to the floor and held his breath as he waited for whatever happens next.

The team collected his blonde off the floor and placed him on the cot. After some deliberation they decided to leave him be.

They blamed his abrupt hysteria on night terrors, which Naruto was apparently already known for having, and unanimously agreed that binding him to the bed would only make matters worse. It only took them a few more moments to collect their things, to move towards the exit. One held back to check Naruto’s vitals, waiting for his breathing to steady, and then he filed out of the room to join the others.

The door closed and something metallic clicked over, the sound deafening in the sudden silence. A sound Sasuke knew.

The lock.

The orderlies had secured the door when they left.

Unknowingly locking Sasuke inside with him.

Chapter Text

“If I left a wound inside you, it is not just your wound but mine as well.”

-Haruki Murakami

--

Naruto stared up at the ceiling, his mind dulling with each passing moment. His eyes kept flickering, the light inside turning on and off, on and off- a burst of consciousness constantly overwhelmed by an impending darkness. The voices were faint whispers now, but their words still sliced straight through him- echoing every insecurity he was helpless to refute. He could feel tears filling his eyes, blurring his vision even more, but they didn’t fall. They almost never did.

Like the voices in his head, the illusions in his mind, when they did show up they were reluctant to part with him.

Shadows swirled above him, looming, an ever-present threat. They didn’t dissipate, but they didn’t descend either. They simply swayed across the ceiling, watching him just as closely as he watched them. Naruto closed his eyes, willing his exhaustion and the chemicals in his veins to take him away from it, from all of it, and they almost did.

Almost.

That is until another sound broke through the fading murmurings in his head. One that seemed far more real than the others. Naruto opened his eyes once more and forced his stare to part with the shadows above him. He let his head fall limply to the side and found Sasuke pushing himself up from the floor.

Naruto’s eyes widened. With all of the chaos, he didn’t even notice Sasuke come back to his room.  

How long has he been here?

How much did he see?

Naruto’s stomach sank as he realized he must have been here for his panic attack.

Which means he probably saw everything.

Naruto didn’t want Sasuke of all people to see him like that. He was already terrified that he would start to avoid him if he saw too much of his condition, if he knew just how unbalanced he really was. And he still couldn’t shake the feeling that he wasn’t the one Sasuke even wanted in the first place. That he had settled for Naruto, but his heart and true desires lie somewhere else.

What if this is the final push he needs to walk away..?

Naruto’s fearful stare locked onto the raven he was suddenly sure he was going to lose.

The one he couldn’t bear to lose.

Sasuke stared back at his anxious blonde, silent as he carefully sought out the right words. He was still trying to figure out how to be comforting and gentle, how to ignore his destructive impulses and calm his ever-present anger. He didn’t want to be that person anymore. Not with Naruto.

Sasuke took a seat beside his blonde and slowly reached out, trying his best not to startle him. His heart clenched tight in his chest when those big blues widened, a flicker of uncertainty flashing in their depths. He hated knowing that Naruto didn’t know if he could trust him.

In fact, it pissed him off.

“You don’t need to be afraid of me” he said, his voice sharper than he had intended.

Naruto didn’t respond. His own voice was trapped somewhere deep inside, sinking in a pool of sedatives. He opened his mouth, trying to find it, and shut it when he failed to do so.

Sasuke smoothed back Naruto’s hair from his face to get a better look at him. He tried to smile, wanting to reassure his anxious blonde, but his eyes refused to go along with it.

Sasuke gave up on the smile pretty quickly. He furrowed his brows as he studied Naruto’s pallid face. “How could you think that I would want anyone else?”

Naruto could feel heat rise up his neck and color his face. He wanted to hide his embarrassment, but he couldn’t look away.

He swallowed hard and finally managed to find his voice. It sounded rough to his ears, as if his throat was coated in sandpaper. “Because you.. shouldn’t want me.”

Sasuke’s fingers tightened in Naruto’s hair, his anger rising. Naruto winced, but it wasn’t enough to get him to loosen them.

“Don’t say shit like that” he growled. “Not to me. Not after everything-”

Sasuke grated his teeth together hard as he fought to reel back the rage rushing through him.

“Goddammit, why don’t you understand?! You are the only person I want, Naruto. I don’t care about anyone else. And you should fucking know that by now.”

Naruto’s lids started to fall, but Sasuke refused to let him slip away. Not yet.

Sasuke slipped his fingers free from Naruto’s hair and roughly grabbed his jaw instead. He jerked his head up and waited for those cloudy blues to find him once more.

“You are everything to me” he said firmly, leaving no room for doubt- for any of those insecurities that likely still plagued his clueless blonde. “Do you hear me, Naruto? You. Are. Everything.”

Naruto’s eyes rolled and his body suddenly went limp in his grasp. Sasuke tried to shake him awake, but it was useless. That looming darkness had finally ensnared him, and it would be a while before it released him.

“Dammit. God. Fucking. Dammit!”

Sasuke carefully released his hold on the blonde, then shot to his feet and angrily paced the length of his room. He was livid. Fucking livid. And he knew full well that he was the only one he could be mad at. It was his fault that Naruto was like this. He put all of those doubts in his head, made him question his loyalty. He was the reason Naruto fell apart like that, and he was the one who failed to fix it. And now..

Who knows how he’ll feel when he wakes up again.

Sasuke roughly dragged his fingers through his hair, loosening dark strands but unable to do a thing about his tangled thoughts.

I fucked up. I fucked up bad.

He looked back over at his blonde and let out a heavy sigh.

How the hell am I supposed to fix this?

He had no answers. Mainly because he had no experience. The person he was before Naruto.. he wasn’t like this. Sasuke always found a way to be charming, but only for his own benefit. He used people, hurt people. He wasn’t used to comforting others, he was used to being the cause of their suffering. He was violent, aggressive- someone to be wary of. The ones who were dumb enough to fall into his trap always came to regret it, and that never mattered to him. But it did now. He couldn’t let Naruto regret trusting him.

“You can fix this” Sasuke muttered to himself as he resumed his pacing. “Just apologize when he wakes up. Tell him he has nothing to worry about. Do whatever it fucking takes. Just fix this.”

You can’t lose him.

The thought brought another one to mind, one that was just as pressing as the others. If not more so.

Sasuke stopped mid-step, and his eyes shot over to the door. The orderlies who responded to Naruto’s screams had, unknowingly, locked him inside with him on their way out. Which he wouldn’t have minded normally, but in an asylum this was a problem. If they found him in here they would never let him stay. Sasuke may have gotten away with sharing that old chair with Naruto, maybe a few harmless touches from time to time, but there was no chance that they would look like other way with something like this.

If they found him, they would send him off to some other asylum.

He would never see Naruto again.

The thought terrified him. Sasuke couldn’t imagine life without Naruto. In fact, continuing on without him was no longer an option for him. Sasuke wouldn’t live without him. There was no reason to. If he lost Naruto..

Then he lost everything.

“So what the fuck do I do about it?”

Sasuke could feel a surge of panic twisting his stomach into knots and rise in his chest, consuming him. He was trapped in here, and he had no idea what he was supposed to do about it.

As luck would have it, he didn’t have to ponder and panic for very long.

That enveloping silence closing in all around him was abruptly, and unexpectedly, broken. He could hear the faint sound of metal bracelets colliding into each other, the sharp click of heels against linoleum, and recognized it immediately.

Ino.

Sasuke didn’t want to have anything to do with the woman, especially after what it just did to Naruto’s fractured psyche, but he couldn’t see any way around it. He had to find a way back to his room, and if anyone was going to release him and look the other way as he snuck back in,

it would be her.

His mind made up, Sasuke rushed over to the door. He silently hoped that she was alone and that no other orderlies were within earshot, then banged his fist against the door. He could hear those cheap heels come to an abrupt halt and let out an audible sigh of relief. It still wasn’t a guarantee that any of this would work, but getting her attention was a good start.

“Hey, Ino” he called out. He made sure to hide the desperation crawling through him, and instead kept his voice smooth, his demeanor icy. It was what she was drawn to after all.

Sasuke banged his fist against the door again, ensuring that she knew which room to find him in.

After a brief pause, he finally heard her footsteps start up again, this time moving quickly towards him. The small panel in the door slid back and a pair of pale blue eyes stared out at him. “Sasuke? What are you doing here? This isn’t your room.”

Jesus Christ.

“I’m aware” he said coldly, struggling to reel in his rising anger. He did his best to force it back down and met her curious gaze. “Look, I need you to open the door.”

The platinum blonde studied his face for a moment before shifting her focus over to the unconscious patient behind him.

“I.. don’t understand” she said slowly. “Have you been sneaking in to visit Naruto?”

Sasuke hesitated.

He was tired of the charade he’s had to play along with, but he didn’t want to risk losing access to Naruto’s room. If he was honest with Ino, the fantasy she had continuously indulged in would shatter. And then what? Would he still be able to win over her favor if she knew that he had absolutely no intention of following through with any of the things he had promised? He didn’t want to risk it, but when he thought about the way Naruto reacted to it, those screams…

He couldn’t keep doing this to him.

“Yes” Sasuke finally answered, “I have.”

Ino’s eyes widened. “Oh.” She gave him a shy smile and slipped her gaze away from his dark penetrating stare, her cheeks reddening.  “I see. I guess you have a thing for blondes..”

Sasuke’s jaw tightened. “I have a thing for Naruto.”

Ino raised her head fast, her shock apparent. “Then, everything between us, that was just..”

“A way for me to get to him” Sasuke finished for her.

He watched her face fall but couldn’t get himself to care, and he refused to apologize. All he did was give her what she wanted. If anything, she should apologize to him. He was the one who had been forced into all of this, and subjected Naruto to it. All because he didn’t feel like he had a choice.

Sasuke watched Ino’s gaze flicker between him and Naruto, and his dark eyes narrowed. He expected to see the disgust he always saw from that homophobe orderly- the one who paid far too much attention to them- and was prepared to defend his blonde as soon as he saw it. So he was especially surprised when not only did she not degrade him for his relationship, she smiled at him for it.

The hell is going on?

Ino’s blush deepened, confusing the raven even more.

“Oh my god” she breathed, “that’s.. that’s really hot.”

Sasuke stared at her, completely bewildered. “What?”

“It’s like a real-life BL..” she murmured, a faraway look in her eyes.

Sasuke furrowed his brows, still unable to process what was happening. “What the hell are you talking about?”

Ino looked around, ensuring that the halls were clear first, then leaned closer. “I’m rooting for you” she whispered.

Sasuke blinked. “…Ok. So, will you open the door now?”

“Oh, right! Of course.”

Ino pulled out an extra set of keys she had snagged from the work room earlier and made short work of the lock. She pulled open the door as quietly as she could, but when Sasuke moved to step over the threshold she stepped in front to stop him.

Sasuke shot her a dark look. “What do you think you’re doing?” he growled.

Ino, somehow now completely unaffected by the raven’s anger, placed her hands on her hips and gave him a stern look. “Aren’t you forgetting something?”

Sasuke grated his teeth.

What kind of game is she playing at?

His eyes narrowed.

Is she really going to force me to do this?

But, as it turned out, Ino had something entirely different in mind.

She nodded to the blonde behind him, an expectant look in her eyes. “You should say goodnight to your lover” she said, a lecherous smile curling her lips.

Sasuke stiffened. “He’s asleep.”

Ino tsked at his stubbornness, another new reaction. Sasuke couldn’t say he was a fan of her sudden brazenness, in fact it was starting to piss him off, but at least she wasn’t trying to coerce him into feeling her up or something. If he wanted to continue avoiding that, he’d probably have to play along with her newest demands.

“Just say what you want” Sasuke snarled, his patience waning fast.

Ino shrugged. “Not much. Maybe just give him a kiss goodnight.”

Sasuke clenched his fists. He was tempted to ram them into her grin and watch her teeth fall to her feet, but he somehow managed to restrain the impulse.

He turned and looked back at his blonde, an exasperated sigh falling from his lips.

“Unbelievable..”

Sasuke walked back to Naruto’s bedside, dropped a hand down beside him, and slowly leaned in. He paused a few inches from his face and turned to look back at their unwelcome guest. Ino’s hands were clasped, pressed tight to her chest, her eyes wide and unblinking, like she didn’t want to miss a single moment.

What the hell is with this girl..

Sasuke turned away from the simpering fangirl and refocused his attention on his unconscious blonde. While he didn’t love that he was doing this in front of Ino, he couldn’t pretend like he didn’t want to kiss him. He always craved the chance to be close to Naruto. If he could, he’d pull him into his arms and spend the night holding him- running his fingers through his hair, tasting his neck, his jawline, his soft lips. Preferably without an audience.

Obviously neither were an option at this point. He would never be able to stay through the night, and Ino clearly had no intention of giving him any privacy.

For now, he would just have to settle for a supervised kiss.

Sasuke lowered his head, using his other hand to cradle his blonde’s face as he drew closer. He murmured Naruto’s name, then gently pressed his lips to his own. He tilted his head to the side and lightly dragged his tongue across his bottom lip, wishing he would wake up and kiss him back, but no such luck. Sasuke kissed him a moment longer then slowly pulled back. He let his fingers fall from his face, tucked a few unruly blonde locks behind his ear, then rose to his feet.

He turned to the woman blocking the doorway, his jaw clenched tight as his initial annoyance returned with a sudden vengeance.

“Satisfied?”

Ino held her face between her hands, that same wide smile pulling at her flushed face. “Yes” she breathed. “Very.”

Sasuke stepped over to the starry-eyed nuisance and leaned down, bringing their faces level, ensuring that his message was received clearly. He watched her lick her lips, somehow still hopeful for his affection despite her overt excitement over what she just saw him do with Naruto. He grimaced at the orderly, his disgust plenty apparent. It did little to sway her interest.

Sasuke glared at her. He was infuriated by the position he found himself in, the attention he didn’t want from the bitch he had already spent far too much time indulging. And he absolutely despised the fact that he still needed her help.

“I expect you to keep quiet about this” he said darkly.

“Sasuke-”

“I mean it” he snarled. “Not. A. Fucking. Word.”

Ino nodded “Don’t worry. Your secret is safe with me.”

Sasuke straightened then pushed past her. He glanced back to make sure she locked the door behind them, then turned and strode down the hall. Or started to. But, just as she did before, Ino grabbed his arm and stopped him from leaving.

Sasuke glowered down at the impudent girl, not bothering to hide his disdain.

“Your room is the other way” she muttered, shrinking under his hateful stare.

“I have something I need to do before I go back.”

Ino’s eyes widened. “Is there.. someone else?” she asked. “Besides Naruto?”

Sasuke wrenched his arm free, fury igniting in his charcoal eyes, burning straight through her. It took everything in him not to punch her across the face.

“There will never be anyone else.”

Ino blinked. “Then why..?”

Goddammit. I don’t have time for this.

“I’ll be quick, alright. Just give me ten minutes, tops.”

“And if I do.. what do I get in return?” Ino asked, suddenly as brazen as she was in Naruto’s room.

Un-fucking-believable.

Sasuke silently cursed the woman’s existence, careful to keep the words off his tongue for the time being. He took a step towards her and reluctantly brought his lips close to her ear, once again playing the part he was expected to. Even if it sickened him to do it.

“The next kiss I let you watch-” he murmured,

“-I’ll make sure Naruto’s awake for it.”

He could hear Ino’s sharp inhale as he pulled back and knew he had her.

Ino didn’t even bother to hide her excitement. As Sasuke took a step back from her she clasped her hands close to her chest, pressing them firmly against her fluttering heart. The thought of Naruto reacting to Sasuke’s advances- kissing him back, maybe even struggling a little before finally giving in to those feelings. Of Sasuke dominating that blonde boy in front of her…

Ino licked her lips. “Really?”

Sasuke truly loathed the idea and was well aware that Naruto would not be the least bit happy with him for it, but he knew he had to give her something. And he was done offering up himself.

“Do we have a deal?” he asked between clenched teeth.

Ino couldn’t agree fast enough.

“Meet me outside my room in ten minutes” Sasuke said firmly.

He didn’t wait for confirmation- he didn’t need to. Ino was always quick to do what she was told. Especially when Sasuke fed into her perverse fantasies. Just as he had no doubt in his mind that she pleasured herself in the bathroom after he told her to, he knew full well that she would be obediently waiting for him when he returned.

God, I fucking hate her.

--

Sasuke padded down the hall, his footsteps muffled by thick socks and careful steps. So far the corridors were empty, but there was no guarantee that they would stay that way. All it took was one patient, one restless orderly..

Sasuke quickened his pace.

Luckily Naruto’s room wasn’t too far from Kiba’s, so it didn’t take him long to get there. He paused once he was in front of it and weighed his options. He could knock, give them enough of a warning to avoid walking in on something he had no interest in seeing, but he didn’t want to risk calling attention to himself. It wasn’t his intention to embarrass Kiba- he’s been a friend to Naruto, and Sasuke didn’t see him as a threat- but honestly he wouldn’t mind seeing Gaara get flustered by his sudden appearance. Maybe Naruto was ready to forgive him, but Sasuke’s hate for the guy had yet to dissipate. He wasn’t sure it ever would.

In fact, after the night he just had, Sasuke was sure that his hatred towards him was stronger than ever. Because while that bastard got to be intimate with his little uke, Sasuke had completely ruined any chance of doing the same with his own.

He couldn’t help but feel like Kiba and Gaara’s perfect night together came at the expense of his own, and he was suddenly eager to ruin it.

Gaara deserved nothing less.

With that thought in mind, Sasuke quickly unlocked the door and threw it open. His eyes shined wickedly in the dim light but his enthusiasm almost immediately faltered, and then stopped altogether. They weren’t alarmed by his presence, embarrassed to be caught doing something sordid. In fact, they had yet to realize he was even there. The two were fast asleep, their bodies tangled and partially covered by a thin sheet, matching smiles locked in place.

It pissed Sasuke off to no end.

He quietly shut the door behind him then stormed over and roughly grabbed Gaara by the shoulder, tearing him away from his perfect undeserved moment.

“Get the fuck up.”

Gaara peeked open one hazy green eye, spotted the irate raven hovering over him, then promptly shut it once more.

Sasuke’s eyes flashed with rage. “Hey, don’t ignore me asshole!”

“Nnhn” Kiba grumbled, just as reluctant to be pulled away from his sleep or his lover. Gaara’s arms tightened around him, and he breathed a content sigh against his temple.

“Fucking ungrateful prick..”

Sasuke grabbed Gaara’s arm with bruising force and roughly tore him out of Kiba’s arms. Gaara started to yell his protests and Sasuke threw him to the ground.

“Nghn. What the hell is your problem?!”

Sasuke dropped down and slammed his hand over his mouth. Gaara’s head smacked against the floor, and he groaned against his palm.

“Keep your fucking mouth shut. We have to go. Now. I don’t have time for your bullshit.”

Gaara glared up at him, too angry to even notice that he was completely naked. He grabbed Sasuke’s wrist, prepared to wrench his hand away, but Sasuke just bore down harder.

“I’m not getting caught because of you, do you understand? You will not ruin this for me.”

Gaara continued to glower up at him, but his muffled curses fell silent. After one final warning look, Sasuke finally released him and rose to his feet. Gaara bit back every vile thing he wanted to shout at the bastard and instead gathered his clothes and quickly slipped them back on. Before Sasuke could drag him away, he dropped down next to his brunette once more, smoothing back his hair and murmuring reassurances. Kiba’s cinnamon eyes stared up at him, practically pleading for him to stay, but Gaara knew he couldn’t. He wanted to, more than anything, but Kakashi’s warning rang in his head- reminding him that if they were caught he would be sent somewhere else.

He wanted to stay with Kiba, but he couldn’t risk losing him.

The redhead met his lover’s big brown eyes. “I’m sorry, Kiba. I have to go.”

“I know.”

Gaara gently cradled his face and couldn’t help but smile when he leaned into his touch.

“I’ll miss you” Kiba whispered against his palm, making Gaara’s chest tighten.

Gaara forced back the lump in the back of his throat and pulled Kiba closer. The two shared a passionate kiss, one that Gaara could have easily sank into. He was reluctant to end it, to leave his lover behind, but Sasuke’s patience was waning fast. He knew he had no intention of giving him that option.

Sasuke barked another crass order, and Gaara knew he couldn’t delay any longer. He reluctantly pulled back, murmured a simple goodnight, and finally rose to his feet.

“Ok, I’m ready.”

“Jesus Christ, finally.”

Sasuke led the way out and, with one final glance over his shoulder, Gaara followed. He watched the door close on his dejected brunette, saw the lock click into place, then the two headed back to his room.

Gaara was quiet at first, knowing that Sasuke wouldn’t willingly talk to him and honestly not all that interested in starting a conversation with him either. But he knew he should say something to show his gratitude, as repugnant as that sounded. He would never have been able to see Kiba without Sasuke’s help, would never have had a night like this. He couldn’t stand the Uchiha, but he wouldn’t trade tonight for the world. And if there was any chance that he could have another one, it was worth swallowing his pride for.

With that thought in mind, Gaara gritted his teeth and forced out the obligatory words.

“Thank you. For doing this. I… appreciate it.”

Sasuke glanced over at the redhead. He was surprised to hear him say anything of the sort, but he couldn’t shake his envy, his hatred. Gaara’s gratitude wasn’t enough to change that.

“Don’t bother” he spat. “This wasn’t my decision.”

Gaara wasn’t the least bit surprised by his hostility- he expected as much. “Fine” he muttered. “Then I’ll just thank Naruto the next time I see him.”

Sasuke immediately stopped. He grabbed the unsuspecting redhead and threw him up against the wall, a fierce snarl pulling his face taut.

“Stay the fuck away from Naruto.”

He had hoped to see fear, but Gaara just gave him an exasperated look. “You’re kidding, right? You saw me with Kiba. I have no interest in anyone else.”

“Then you have no reason to go near him” Sasuke growled.

Gaara could feel his own anger rising, irritated by the assumptions. He wasn’t a fucking threat to them, and he didn’t like being accused otherwise.

“He’s the one who came to me” Gaara snapped, “not the other way around.”

“I don’t fucking care” Sasuke snarled. “I’m telling you right now. Back. Off.”

“Christ, fine, whatever. Just chill out already. I won’t do anything.”

Sasuke grip tightened before he finally released him. He took a step back and watched as Gaara quietly smoothed his rumpled clothing, trying not to feel guilty for his aggressive outburst. Gaara raised his head and gave him a questioning look, but Sasuke merely turned away and continued down the hall.

Gaara shook his head and walked after him. Fucking psycho.

Though, considering where they were, he supposed that was to be expected.

As soon as they got to the right room Sasuke all but shoved the redhead into it, then locked the door and took off towards his own. He knew he was pushing his luck by staying out in the open for this long and was anxious to get back before he really was caught.

He found Ino standing outside his room, obedient as ever. It worked in his favor now, but it still sickened him to think about her reactions to him. And the likelihood that she had done exactly what he told her to in the past. He quickly forced the thought to the far recesses of his mind, where hopefully it would fail to ever resurface. He briskly walked past her, dropping the keys in her hand along the way, and entered his room without a word. Of course, Ino wasn’t willing to let him go that easily.

“Have a good night, Sasuke.”

Sasuke glanced back at the open door and the woman once again standing unwelcome in front of it. He glared at her, his gaze as cold and dark as ever. The girl blushed, somehow even more enthralled by his disinterest.

“Shouldn’t you be leaving?” he snapped, not bothering to hide his impatience.

Ino simply smiled past it, unbothered by his icy demeanor.

“Sweet dreams” she added. “And if they’re not about me.. I hope they’re about Naruto.”

She winked, and Sasuke’s composure snapped. He took an angry step towards her, and Ino finally took the hint. She quickly closed the door and sealed the furious raven inside.

Despite the dangerous glint in his eye, the anger practically spewing from his pores, Ino left with that same smile on her face. She skipped down the hall, heading back to her post feeling happier than ever.

“Things just got a lot more interesting around here.”

Chapter Text

“We are dealing with a madman.”

-Sleepy Hollow

--

Naruto chewed at his bottom lip as he walked into the community room, trying and failing to soothe his worries. His frazzled nerves hummed making him feel jittery, his skin tight. A lot of last night was still a blur in his mind, but what he could recall made him incredibly uneasy.

He knew about Ino- the flirting and teasing Sasuke felt he had no choice but to comply with. It didn’t appear to be much more than that, but Naruto knew it bothered Sasuke immensely.

And, as it turned out, it bothered him too.

At first it was just concern for his raven-haired companion. Sasuke was clearly upset that he was forced to act in a way he didn’t want to, and that saddened Naruto. He told him as much, and he meant it when he said it, but something changed when Sasuke left his room that night.

The reassurances he had given and the truths that Sasuke had shared warped in Naruto’s mind, twisting into something malignant and unrecognizable. There was a darkness inside of him, bitter and cruel, and Sasuke’s absence made it stronger. Gave it voice.

A lot of them, in fact.

They were sharp and callous, relentless and innumerable. Naruto tried to talk them down, to murmur back reassurances just as he had with Sasuke, but they wouldn’t listen. They screamed at him, the voices shrill as they drilled into his skull that he wasn’t wanted. That Sasuke was just using him until he could have the one he was really after.

That Naruto could never be that someone.

Naruto didn’t want to believe them, but the collective was getting harder to ignore, and then finally it just became unbearable.

He could feel them. The manifestations that those voices- his fears- had become. They tore through him, fighting their way out, spilling from his pores, clawing out of his throat. He could faintly remember screaming with them but by then he couldn’t decipher his own voice from theirs.

Naruto’s cries became more desperate when those same forms that had fled from him suddenly tried to burrow their way back inside. Hands were holding him down, and he couldn’t decipher between those either. Everything was fear and chaos, and the terror had completely consumed him.

That part of the night he had definitely not forgotten. Those horrid feelings always seemed to stay with him, latching on for good. Last night was no exception.

No, what he was really struggling to recall was everything else.

Primarily, Sasuke.

Naruto remembered seeing his eyes, that inky black void he so frequently lost himself in. They had been even darker last night- cast in shadow by the furrow of his brow. Or maybe it was what was inside of them that made them seem that way. The flashes of concern lighting up an otherwise consistent black sea of fury.  

The duality in his gaze confused Naruto- more so now that he couldn’t recall anything apart from that look.

Nothing Sasuke had said came to mind. Every syllable remained lost, faded- like wisps of smoke drifting further out of reach. So very faint, and impossible to grasp.

Not knowing made his chest ache.

His stomach clenched tight, crushing the swirl of unsuspecting butterflies inside, and his skin continued to thrum.

Naruto wondered what was worse- the fear of the unknown or the horror of Sasuke’s answers.

Maybe it’s better not to know.

He knew the thought was pointless. Even if he wanted to, he’d never be able to actually avoid Sasuke. They were thrown into the same community space everyday, and Sasuke gained access to his room more nights than not. And, more than that, Naruto just didn’t want to be away from him.

He just wasn’t sure he wanted to hear what he had to say.

You have to confront this, Naruto chided himself.

Putting it off isn’t going to change anything.

You know that.

The troubled blonde took a deep breath, raised his head, and found a pair of dark eyes staring back at him.

Naruto flinched, a sharp inhale lodging somewhere in the back of his throat. He never even heard him walk up.

How long has he been standing there?  

He locked onto those onyx eyes, ones he had not been expecting to see so suddenly, and watched them harden as Sasuke stared back.

He didn’t like how I reacted, Naruto realized. He’s angry again.

Or maybe still.

“Sasuke.. I-”

Naruto could feel the words tangle in his throat and slowly pressed his lips together, defeated. He watched as Sasuke reached out to him and held his breath, wondering what it meant.

Why his eyes still shone with that same concern.

Why anger continued to reside with it.

He was prepared for Sasuke to grab him roughly and jerk him forward, to scream out his frustrations and Naruto’s faults. He expected the rage he never seemed to be without. So when Sasuke’s hands were gentle- his fingers soft on his arm, in his hair- he was even more perplexed.

The anger in those dark eyes turned out to be completely misleading.

Sasuke pulled him close, his grasp firm but careful. Those impenetrable eyes studied the blonde’s face, straying from wide blues to flushed cheeks briefly before quickly darting back.

Naruto stared up at him, still utterly confounded by this version of Sasuke- one he wasn’t as familiar with. Being held by him so gently.. it made his throat click, his mind spin. There were so many things that he wanted to say, questions he needed to ask, but he couldn’t seem to find the words.

Or maybe he didn’t want to.

Maybe he just didn’t want to sour something so sweet.

Naruto liked this feeling. Being held and cared for, knowing it was Sasuke wrapped so tightly around him, and he was tempted to sink into his embrace completely. To accept all of the pleasures that came with it openly, without hesitation. Unfortunately, this was neither the time nor the place for it.

“Sasuke-”

“Shh. Just let me hold you until they make me stop.”

Whatever protest Naruto had been prepared to give disintegrated on the tip of his tongue. He swallowed down its remnants and surrendered himself once more.

They both knew an end to such closeness was inevitable. The orderlies weren’t too keen on letting their patients act intimately in any way. Even with the few exceptions they’d made, the times they chose to look the other way when they would share a chair made for one or the few light touches they would exchange, this definitely wouldn’t be one of those times.

A hug with Sasuke was no mere hug.

It was far too intimate to be considered friendly, too provocative to be deemed even remotely innocent. Sasuke pressed his body so close, forcing their heart to sync and groins to pulse. His fingers were restless, burying in blonde locks, skating across his lower back- drawing ragged breath and strangled mewling sounds that Naruto had not intended on making. At least not publicly.

No, a hug with Sasuke was definitely not innocent. And it didn’t take long before one of orderlies took notice of it.

A voice that neither of them recognized suddenly shot out across the room, slicing through the intimacy steadily building between them. “Hey! That’s enough you two, break it up!”

Sasuke was reluctant to do anything of the sort, but Naruto wasn’t one to just ignore a new presence. He lifted his head and peeked out from Sasuke’s arms. A tall orderly with thick biceps and a feral snarl glared back at him, fuming.

Naruto blinked. “We’re not fighting” he tried, hoping to calm some of the fury he saw there.

Unfortunately, it seemed to have the opposite effect.

The man clenched his teeth hard, brows fixed in a permanent scowl. He narrowed his eyes. “I didn’t ask” he growled. “Now do as you’re fucking told.”

Sasuke jerked his head to the side, eyes ablaze. “Watch your fucking tone with him!”

“What did you just say?!”

The man continued to advance on them, and Sasuke quickly pulled Naruto out of his arms and shoved him behind him. He refused to let someone with that much blatant hostility come anywhere near his blonde. The only exception to that particular rule was himself. And even then, Sasuke knew that there were times when it was necessary for others to intervene- when his anger would completely take hold of him and he’d need someone else to keep Naruto safe from it.

No matter what, protecting Naruto came first.

Simple as that.

Sasuke eyes hardened, teeth bared- he was wholly prepared to act. The orderly was huge, but Sasuke has been vengeful and violent for most of his life. As long as he can catch him off guard, he was sure he could take him down before the guy got anywhere near Naruto.

Sasuke took a fast step towards him, suddenly eager to get started, but a second orderly abruptly stepped between them before he could take things any further.

Iruka threw out his hands fast, hoping to ward off his irate cohort and reactive patient before things really got out of hand.

“Hey, hey, hold on. Just calm down, Kisame.”

Kisame glared back at him, his disdain for the brunette palpable. “Don’t tell me how to do my job.”

Iruka immediately looked alarmed. He could understand how their patients managed to set the guy off, but he didn’t expect to face that same hostility himself.

“Kisame-”

“Shouldn’t you be off with Kakashi” he spat, eyes glinting like knives, slicing straight through him.

All the blood drained from Iruka’s face.

“What are you talking about..?”

Kisame ignored the question and instead shifted his gaze back to the two wordlessly standing behind Iruka. His mocking sneer curdled, twisting his face into a gruesome mask.

“Guess I shouldn’t be surprised that you would let them get away with this. You types just stick together, don’t you.”

All the color that had initially fled from Iruka’s face made an abrupt return. He could feel heat crawling up his neck, reddening his cheeks.  “Excuse me?!” he snapped. “What did you just say to me?!”

Kisame didn’t appear to be the least bit concerned by his outrage. If anything, it seemed to encourage him.

“Whatever” he muttered. “I’m sure Kakashi will just let you do what you want.”

Kisame gave Naruto and Sasuke another disapproving look, shared it with Iruka, and before he could respond turned around and strode off.

Iruka stared after him, utterly bewildered.

His interactions with Kisame were few and far between, and none of them had ever been like this. At most they would exchange a few pleasantries, share a quick note or observation about a patient, but that was really the extent of their relationship. It was odd to be so hated by someone he didn’t even know, and that wasn’t even the strangest thing about that interaction.

How could he possibly know about me and Kakashi?

He’s been so careful not to be seen sneaking off to his office, and they staggered their arrival times to avoid anyone noticing that they had actually come together. He wasn’t intimate with Kakashi anywhere that wasn’t private, and they never ran into other orderlies on their dates. He just didn’t understand it.

At first.

That is until his perplexed stare stumbled across the man watching him from the far side of the room.

Mizuki.

Of course it was Mizuki.

He was the only one who could have guessed at their relationship. And the only one vindicative enough to make it public.

When he had cornered Iruka and refused to release him, Kakashi was the one who had stepped in. The one who had stopped him from taking things any further. And Mizuki hadn’t been too pleased by it. Iruka wanted to believe that it was because the fucking homophobe couldn’t stand his unapologetic preferences, but the look in Mizuki’s eyes, the way he gripped his jaw and refused to let go…

How close he had gotten.

One thing was for sure. Somewhere along the way, that hate had become something far more terrifying.

Iruka narrowed his eyes and watched with displeasure as the orderly he had quickly come to despise smirked at him over the rim of his coffee cup. Mizuki slowly raised it in a silent unwelcome greeting, and Iruka quickly turned away. That amused grin pissed him off, but that wasn’t what made Iruka’s stomach churn.

It was his stare. Cold, piercing, like thick shards of ice against exposed flesh. He could feel his skin tighten under that look and felt the sudden urge to shrink away from it, to find a place where those eyes couldn’t reach.

Iruka shivered as he turned away and returned his focus to the two standing behind him, once again locked in each other’s arms. Their faces were close as they murmured to each other, their hands roaming- gentle and sure. Definitely far too intimate for the setting they were in.

Even Iruka couldn’t deny that.

He wouldn’t deal with it like Kisame had attempted to, but he couldn’t simply look the other way either.

“Alright Uzumaki, Uchiha- you two had your fun. I need you to separate now, hands to yourself.”

Sasuke glared back at him, but Naruto- as the far more reasonable of the two- quickly did as he was told. He unwrapped his arms from Sasuke’s waist and pulled out of his grasp, taking a step back for added measure. Sasuke moved towards him, fully intending on bringing his blonde back, but Naruto held his hand out to ward him off.

He shook his head. “Sasuke, he helped us. It wouldn’t be right to-”

“To what- hug?! Really? I can’t just fucking hug you?!”

Iruka took a step forward, his jaw set. “Sasuke, you’re going to need to reel in your anger if you want to stay in here.”

Sasuke snarled at the brunette, frustrated that the bastard had any say in the matter. That he had convinced Naruto to pull back from him and dared threaten to separate them. He couldn’t stand how little control he had, how domineering everyone was over every little thing he did. He just wanted to live his fucking life- with his blonde at his side, and some goddamn privacy. Was that really so much to ask for?

Sasuke shifted close to Naruto, his anger skyrocketing when he backed further away from him.

“Naruto” he growled, his voice a low warning. “Don’t piss me off.”

He had tried so hard to keep his anger in check, but he couldn’t stand seeing him pull away like this.

Why the fuck is he listening to him instead of me?

Sasuke felt a sudden impulse to spin around and launch himself at the orderly. To tear his throat out and permanently silence him, then drag off his disobedient blonde and remind him where his loyalties should lie. He was feeling violent, destructive- increasingly so. And he was positive that they could see it on his face.

Iruka was steadily drawing closer to him, like a man preparing to dismantle an active explosive, and Naruto wasn’t any better. His expression was still that same neutral look he usually had, but those wide blues gave him away. Sasuke could see how alarmed he was, and while it wasn’t enough to make his anger completely dissipate, it did force his resolve to falter a bit.

That wasn’t the look he wanted to see from him.

Sasuke watched those cerulean eyes shift around the room, noting the many orderlies who had turned to look their way. Each one appeared to be prepared to act, waiting to see if their intervention was necessary. Naruto’s stare returned to him, but still not in the way he was hoping. Sasuke was tempted to tell him as much, but Naruto spoke before he had the chance to share his displeasure.

“Please, Sasuke. If you don’t calm down, they’ll make you leave.”

Sasuke clenched his fists, pulling the skin around his knuckles taut. It took every ounce of control for him to restrain his violent impulses. The rational part of his mind was well aware that Naruto was right, but it was hard to stay reasonable when everything in him was screaming at him to lash out.

Don’t.

Don’t fuck up anything else. You still need to fix things with Naruto, he reminded himself.

If you get dragged away now, he’s going to spend the rest of the fucking day panicking and thinking a bunch of unnecessary things.

Sasuke knew his blonde well enough to know exactly what he would do without him. His mind would plunge into a sea of baseless worries and irrational insecurities, and he would wind up driving himself to madness.

Sasuke couldn’t let that happen.

Not again.

Not when all it took to avoid such overwhelming chaos was his meager presence and a few simple reassurances.

And if that wasn’t enough of a reason to calm his fury, the community room’s newest arrival definitely was.

Sasuke noticed him out of the corner of his eye, his frown deepening with each added step.

Gaara.

He watched with growing distaste as the redhead walked into the room looking as pitiful and lost as ever. Exactly the kind of look that would draw his sensitive little blonde in. And with Kiba still in isolation, Gaara was far more likely to accept his company.

There was no way in hell Sasuke was going to leave Naruto alone with him. He was just too naïve for his own good, and a hell of a lot smaller than that bastard. It wouldn’t take much for him to be overpowered or conned into doing something sordid that he just didn’t understand.

The thought of Gaara putting his hands on Naruto already made Sasuke fucking livid. But if it was his fault- if something happened because he couldn’t control himself and he was dragged off...

Sasuke took a deep breath and forced himself to take a step back, physically and mentally. Naruto seemed to notice both and the concern in his eyes easily faded. Sasuke breathed out again and unclenched his fists, stretching out his fingers, trying to shake off the tension in them.

“Ok” he said quietly.

Iruka looked between the two, surprised to see all of that explosive fire in the Uchiha suddenly flicker out like that. “I’m impressed.”

Sasuke shot him a dark look. “Don’t be. It wasn’t for you.”

Iruka nodded, choosing not to take offense to his abrasive tone. Working in a place like this- that was the least of his concerns.

Which reminded him,

he had someone far worse to deal with.

Iruka sent the two off, reminding them to keep a reasonable distance, suggesting that they find a more appropriate way to spend their day, then turned and strode off. He met the eyes of a few concerned orderlies and gave each of them a small smile and shake of his head in turn. A quiet appreciative gesture while also letting them know that there was no need for it. They nodded their acknowledgment and continued with their own assignments.

Just as Iruka had hoped they would.

He wasn’t interested in being isolated with Mizuki, but he didn’t want to put their interaction on full display either. The whole point of confronting him now was to make sure that more rumors didn’t spread. He needed to shut the guy up, not give him an audience.

Iruka could feel Mizuki’s eyes on him as he drew closer, and his hardened resolve started to crack. He was determined, but that wasn’t enough to ease his trepidation. He decided that he needed a minute to calm the anxiety moths flitting around in his gut and casually veered off to the small alcove that served as their coffee station.

He could still see some of the room, but the area was sectioned off enough to give a bit of privacy and to help keep patients from venturing into it (for the most part). Orderlies typically started their mornings gathered around it and returned to it mid-day for short breaks and necessary refills. Luckily most patients weren’t interested in interrupting that. They usually preferred to stay under their radar, if possible.

The morning crowd had already made their appearance, leaving the alcove completely unoccupied. It was perfect. A little space for him to collect his thoughts before he confronted the monster vexing his nerves and souring his mood.

Starting with some liquid courage.

Iruka glanced at the coffee pot and sighed. Empty already.

He refilled the water, tossed in a generous portion of coffee grounds, and elected for a large pot to be brewed this time around. He fully immersed himself in it as he waited- the sputter of the machine, the coffee’s bitter, earthy scent. It soothed him.

It was exactly what he needed. Just something to take the edge off, to ease the twisted coils in his stomach and settle the panicky fluttering in his chest. A tall glass of wine would have been heavenly, but a steaming mug of something sweet and bitter was a decent alternative.   

Iruka scoured the cabinets in search of his favorite mug as the sputtering grew inconsistent, his brew nearly complete. He gave another annoyed sigh.

Did someone seriously take-

He paused mid thought and smiled.

There.

He spotted the heavy, chipped porcelain monstrosity hanging on a hook next to the top shelf and rose up on the tips of his toes to reach it. His fingers had barely skimmed along the edge of it when something solid suddenly pressed up against him.

It didn’t take much to guess who it was.

“Need a little help, Iruka?”

Iruka flinched. He hated the way he said his name- like there was a secret lying between each syllable and he wanted him to beg for his silence.

Iruka grimaced. “No, Mizuki” he spat, filling his name with venom, “I don’t.”

Iruka dropped his hand and let his feet fall back to the floor, giving up on the mug entirely. He shifted to the side, but Mizuki wasn’t going to let him get away that easily. He quickly snatched Iruka’s wrist and jerked him back to face the counter. He forced his hand flat against the granite and pressed in close from behind.

“And where do you think you’re going?” he murmured, a sinister smile stretching his face taut.

“Let go” Iruka snarled, trying his best to keep the fear out of his voice.

Mizuki wasn’t buying it.

“Are you afraid of me, Iruka?”

“What reason would I have to be afraid of someone like you” he spat.

Mizuki glanced over Iruka’s shoulder, his eyes sliding to the brunette’s face, watching every emotion play out. He enjoyed the panic he saw flickering in those chestnut eyes, the alarm in his tense posture- like he was prepared to spring away as soon as he found an opening.

Mizuki wondered what look he’d find if Iruka knew what more he had planned for him.

His grin widened and Iruka quickly turned away, sickened by the look.

This is bad.

You need to get out of this.

You need to get out of this right NOW.

Iruka clenched his teeth together and jerked his arm back as hard as he could, desperate to break free from his grasp, but it was useless. Mizuki’s strength superseded his own, and he already had him at a disadvantage keeping him pinned over the counter like this.

He tried to claw at the hand around his wrist, but Mizuki dragged it forward, forcing Iruka to release him to keep himself from face-planting. Iruka jammed the tips of his fingers against the countertop, trying his best to keep himself upright- to hold onto some semblance of the dignity that Mizuki seemed so eager to strip him of. Being pinned to the counter with him standing behind him was bad enough already. He couldn’t imagine how much worse Mizuki would be if he had him bent over it.

Iruka forced the thought from his mind and his anger to the forefront once more.

“Fucking prick- I said let go.”

Mizuki didn’t respond, but the grip around his wrist tightened, making Iruka wince. He glanced down and saw Mizuki place his other hand on the edge of the counter, a hairsbreadth from his hip.

He swallowed hard. “We’re not doing this again.”

“What aren’t we doing again, Iruka?”

Iruka recoiled from his breathy whisper, still attempting to force some space between them.

“I have no interest in entertaining you” he snapped.

He refused to play along, to show the fear the snide bastard seemed so hellbent on finding. Guys like Mizuki wanted the chase- the rush of adrenaline, teary gasps and pathetic pleas for mercy. A struggle for dominance and the satisfaction of coming out on top.

Iruka had absolutely no intention of giving him anything of the sort.

Mizuki considered the brunette for a moment then shifted his hand from the edge of the counter to the side of Iruka’s small waist. He felt him flinch under his palm and bore down harder, relishing in the feel.

His grin widened, and something dark flickered in his eyes- a look that Iruka couldn’t see but could absolutely sense. It sent a chill down his spine and made his heart lurch in his chest- suddenly desperate to flee. He stiffened as Mizuki leaned closer, that feral smile brushing against his ear.  

“What if I don’t give you a choice?”

--

Gaara entered the community room with sad jade eyes and a deep frown already locked in place. The night before had been nothing short of paradise, but that only made today feel so much worse.

Kiba was still locked away in his room, despite Gaara’s many objections, which meant that being out in the open like this was fucking pointless.

Gaara had no interest in interacting with anyone else, and even if he wanted to Sasuke had already made it plenty clear that his company was unwelcome. Apart for Kiba and those two, he didn’t know anyone. And he saw no point in changing that.

Gaara had lazily dragged his feet down the hall, his reluctance palpable, until the orderly escorting him finally got impatient and practically threw him into the room. He glared daggers at the man, but by then he’d already turned and walked away to attend to other patients and Gaara wasn’t interested in chasing him down. He settled for flipping off his retreating form, then redirected his attention to the rest of the room.

He surveyed the lifeless bunch with disinterest, still half hoping that he’d spot his little brunette. That the assholes who controlled their lives had managed to find a fucking heart and release him.

No such luck.

He caught Sasuke’s gaze at one point and the two exchanged a dark look before he turned away. He didn’t even bother looking at the blonde. He was obviously standing somewhere beside the irritable raven, and would probably offer a friendlier gesture than his counterpart did, but Gaara wasn’t interested. Kiba would be out tomorrow, and he didn’t want to be locked away when he was because of something as stupid as antagonizing a sociopath. He had read Sasuke’s warning clear as day when their eyes met, and he didn’t care to test his restraint.

With little else to do, Gaara slowly walked the perimeter of the room. His gaze shifted from his feet to the various patients around him as he moved, his expression relatively blank, his apathy blatant. He avoided the chair that Sasuke and Naruto coveted, the journal undoubtedly tucked between its lumpy cushions, and wandered off to the far side of the room where he often saw staff meander over to. Keeping to the far wall, he was able to see part of a small alcove. It hid away a little kitchenette, and he found himself curiously peering inside.

Because of the odd angle of the partially surrounding wall all he saw at first was the back of a man. He was tall, lean- seemingly young despite his long silvery hair. As Gaara moved closer, he noticed that there was someone else standing there- trapped between the kitchen counter and the orderly towering over him.

Gaara tilted his head as he studied the scene, trying to make sense of it.

The fuck is going on here?

He kept his feet quiet, his approach nonchalant, and somehow managed to go unnoticed as he drew closer. The silver-haired orderly leaned in and the brunette in front of him jerked to the side, revealing part of a pale, freckled face.

One that Gaara recognized.

It was the man who had convinced the doctor to let him see Kiba. The one who had arranged for them to meet and continuously shoved him back down onto his chair every time Gaara shot up in a fit of rage. The person who gave him a chance to apologize.

The reason he was able to confess his feelings.

He recalled the doctor calling him by name, rather casually for a boss addressing his subordinate. Iruka.

Why is he-?

Gaara froze midstep. He was close enough now to see his eyes. They were nearly the same color as Kiba’s, and wide with nothing short of terror.

He’s scared.

Iruka was very clearly not Kiba. He would be a fool to confuse the two. And yet.. seeing those big brown eyes hold so much fear, Gaara couldn’t help but react to it. Something in his chest swelled, making his pulse quicken and his temper flare. Without a second thought, with Kiba’s face at the forefront of his mind, Gaara ran over to them.

“Hey!! Get the fuck away from him!”

Mizuki turned, surprised and dismayed to find a patient racing towards them. “What are you-”

It had been just enough of a distraction for Iruka to find his long-awaited opening.

As soon as Mizuki straightened, Iruka clenched his teeth tight and threw his head back. His skull slammed into Mizuki’s jaw, forcing his teeth up and straight through his tongue. The orderly groaned and stumbled back and Iruka hurriedly slipped away from him. He stumbled over unsteady feet, ramming into the counter as he scrambled to put distance between them.

Mizuki spat blood into the sink and cupped his jaw as he glared at the redhead. The patient who had the audacity to show up here and come between them.

Especially when things were just starting to get good.

“What do you think you’re doing here?” he snarled.

“Gaara..?”

Gaara glanced over his shoulder at the shocked brunette, noting his disheveled clothes, his fearful brown eyes. He clenched his jaw and turned his hardened gaze back to the other orderly, watching with some satisfaction as he wiped a trickle of blood away from his chin.

“I could ask you the same question” he growled back.

Mizuki gave him a sharp look.

A dangerous one.

“I don’t know what you thought you saw, Sabaku, but whatever it was I promise it wasn’t real.”

“Is that right..” Gaara said slowly.

“Delusions are not uncommon” Mizuki added, taking a predatory step towards him. “They can even make patients unstable. Violent. And if that’s true, I may have to sedate you.

Be a real shame if you had to stay that way for a few days, don’t you think?”

Gaara’s eyes flared with an anger he knew he couldn’t act on.

And it infuriated him.

There were always people like this- monsters with inflated egos and far too much power. People who tormented anyone weaker than them with a smile on their face. Gaara was deemed a monster ten years ago, and he didn’t do much to prove them wrong, but this.. this was something else. Just one look at the guy told him that this wasn’t just someone who liked getting a rise out of people, who antagonized people simply for a reaction the way that Gaara did.

No. This was something entirely different.

There was something cruel in his eyes, something inhuman. Gaara got the impression that he would torment someone to the brink of death just to see how their fear unfolds. That he would relish in the sound of pained cries, and laugh as a man sobbed beneath him.

Gaara was well aware of his own faults, and he had plenty to be ashamed of, but he was sure it didn’t come close to the kind of shit this guy pulled.

“You’re insane” Gaara murmured.

Mizuki narrowed his eyes. “And you’re in the way.”

He went to step around the redhead, but Gaara moved fast, cutting off his access to Iruka once more.

“Stay away from him.”

He could tell that the man had no intention of doing anything of the sort, and he seemed ready to say as much, but another voice interjected before he could make himself heard.

“Mizuki? Is everything alright in there?”

Gaara glanced over and saw several orderlies closing in, having finally taken notice of the patient hovering just inside their reserved coffee nook. One that he was far from welcome in.

Distracted by the sea of unhappy faces, Gaara didn’t move fast enough to stop Mizuki from finally retaliating. Before he knew it, Gaara was shoved face down on the floor, a knee on his back, his arms roughly yanked behind him.

“Nnghn- let go!”

Mizuki ignored him and instead gave a friendly smile to the few orderlies who had now joined them. “Not to worry. I’ve got everything under control.”

“Uhh! Get this asshole off of me! I didn’t do anything! He’s the one who-”

“Do you mind grabbing a sedative for me?” Mizuki called out, drowning out the sounds of Gaara’s truths and protests.

“Yeah, I think I’ve got one here.”

A man stepped forward but was almost immediately cut off by another. Gaara couldn’t see either of them very clearly from his spot on the floor, but he could definitely hear the confusion in the orderly’s voice.

“Iruka? What’re you doing?”

Iruka didn’t answer- he didn’t even look his way. Instead he walked straight over to Mizuki, shoved him off of Gaara, and as he stumbled to his feet he threw the contents of the entire coffee pot directly in his face.

Gaara looked up and froze, eyes wide with shock. He half expected to hear the man shriek in pain as hot coffee burned through the skin off his face, but Mizuki merely gasped in surprise and stumbled back another step. The coffee was temperate- far from scalding- and he had managed to turn his face away before it had the chance to hit its mark. He wasn’t harmed in the least, but the message was still plenty received.

Iruka was pissed.

And now, everyone knew it.

Mizuki wiped his face against his sleeve, then turned back to face Iruka- to tear him away from all the watchful eyes and teach him a very valuable lesson- but unfortunately by the time he looked up he was already gone.

Several others rushed over to Mizuki- to tend to wounds he didn’t even have and badger him with questions- all the while blocking him from the brunette he wasn’t near done with and the redhead who’d gotten in his way in the first place.

He was far from pleased.

“Mizuki! What happened between you and Iruka?”

Nothing, he thought to himself.

Yet.

But that was about to change.

Kakashi’s little tease could run, but he sure as fuck couldn’t hide from him for long. Mizuki would get his hands on him. And when he did, he’d make sure no one was there to make him stop.