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It was strange—to feel like this sometimes.
Kaveh found himself sighing into his third glass of wine that evening, looking around the busy tavern with tired eyes and slouched shoulders that ached with the pains of sitting slouched over his drafting table for several days in a row. Still, those aches felt like minor bruises compared to the hollow gnawing clawing at his chest.
Across from him, Cyno and Tighnari were in the middle of a heated card game—something about Cyno being eager to test out a new deck he’d been working on and looking for an excuse to fight his friends with it. Tighnari had just sighed, rolled his eyes, and pulled out a deck box of his own while they waited for the food to be served. With how busy it was today, as well as their order size, no doubt it would take a while. The next table over, Madam Faruzan was also weighing in on their match, delivering snarky commentary within earshot of Dehya and Candace who’d just arrived and were looking for a table of their own.
It was becoming a proper party, and Kaveh found himself not quite enjoying it as much as he should be.
This was supposed to be a dinner to celebrate another finished project for Sumeru’s ever-expanding help of the desert folk, but of course it had come with too many setbacks to justify properly celebrating. The only reason he was here at all was because Alhaitham had lured him out of his dark corner of a room with the promise of food and drink and all but dragged him here. Naturally, Kaveh had whined and sulked all the way there until it became clear he wasn’t the one who would be footing the bill. How could he? The pay for this project had all gone into repaying his debt. It had taken off quite the sizable chunk, and that was actually something he could crack a small smile about.
Still…
Tired carmine eyes made eye contact with themselves in the reflection of the wine, and the eyebags underneath alone were enough to make him swallow down any joy he must have felt for a fleeting moment.
What would his mother say if she saw him now? The Light of Kshahrewar was supposed to be celebrating another job well done; another major contribution to the betterment of Sumeru finished, and yet here he was sulking into his drink like it might kill him if he waited long enough. What would she think of her son, perfectly fine on the outside, but rotting from within and several organs hastily cut and torn out, only to have them hammered into the foundations and walls of all of his works to make them stronger. Better. He was supposed to be better.
A hand found the covered skin of his shoulder, touching it lightly, and Kaveh found himself jolting just slightly at the foreign touch. His tired eyes landed on the bright pink ones belonging to Collei, who quickly pulled her hand back. Next to her, Layla blinked sleepily over the giant stack of books in her arms.
“Mister Kaveh? You were zoning out there for a bit.”
Kaveh blinked, snapped out of his haze for a moment. Was he really that obvious? The awkward little laugh spilling from his throat came out a tiny bit too fast for his liking, an apologetic look on his face as he waved off Collei’s obvious concern. “Oh, I was? Sorry, I was just thinking.”
“About what?” Faruzan chimed in from where she leaned over the back rest of her booth, cocking an eyebrow in his direction. The game of cards continued, even as one of Tighnari’s large ears also swiveled in his direction. “We’re here to have fun. Don’t tell me Kshahrewar’s top architect is still thinking about work even when it’s already over.”
Kaveh quickly hid his expression in his wineglass, trying to take a sip to avoid having to answer too fast. The alcohol tasted sweet on his tongue—smooth yet tangy in the way he loved so much as it slid down his throat and settled in his stomach with a feeling of cozy warmth. No doubt this was an expensive bottle. Did Alhaitham pay for it? “I can’t help it, okay? I think I can speak for a lot of professionals when I’m still considering what could have been improved even after the project is already over.”
“And it’s very appreciated,” Candace commented with a sweet hum, finally having found a seat nearby. Dehya just settled for sitting on the edge of the table instead as she nodded along with a bright grin.
“Right? You Akademiya folks really know your stuff, even if most of you people are pretentious pricks with no sense of humor.” She glanced just slightly to Kaveh’s left, and her grin grew just slightly crooked. “No offense.”
“None taken,” Alhaitham hummed over the edge of his book, rolling his eyes in classic Alhaitham fashion.
Kaveh found himself snorting in amusement at the sheer boredom dripping from his roommate’s lips, but he was quickly silenced when one of said roommate’s hands landed on his knee and gave it a small, reassuring squeeze. He knew what that meant.
I know you’re not feeling well. I see you. Please stay a while.
It was no surprise then that Kaveh placed his own free hand on top of the other’s, giving it a tiny squeeze of his own.
Thank you. Please stay with me.
Just in time too, because just as Lambad came by with their order, the main doors burst open and a very familiar traveling duo finally arrived at the party. Fashionably late too, as always. Paimon came flying straight in, beelining it to their table as her eyes all but lit up at the sight of so much food. The Traveler just strolled on in right behind her, pace as leisurely as the apologetic smile on their face. Judging by how much dirt and scratches they were covered in, they probably came here straight after a commission or two. That was not very surprising.
What was surprising, however, was the fact that a familiar guy with a large hat came strolling in right behind them, flanked on one side by Sethos and on the other by the Dendro Archon herself.
However lively their celebration had been up until now, it was no match for the sheer spike of energy that flooded through all the patrons at the sight of their very own goddess making time in her day to come join in on the fun. She simply waved to the people she passed, walking along until she finally reached the main table and proceed to squeeze herself onto the bench right next to Kaveh.
“Nahida heard about the party and wanted to join,” was all the explanation Traveler had to offer, and Kaveh found himself sighing in defeat as he shifted just slightly away from her and closer to Alhaitham’s side. No offense.
“None taken,” Nahida hummed, and Kaveh all but jumped out of his skin as sudden laughter rang out between his friends.
“Right. Mind reading.” He found himself rolling his eyes, groaning at his own misfortune as Cyno looked about ready to burst into tears from laughing too hard. No doubt he was getting ready to fire off a pun within the next ten seconds. “I keep forgetting about that.”
“Like you mind gobbling these—” Cyno started, only to get cut off by a swift boot to his shin or three, Tighnari looking a little too proud of himself there.
“Ignore him. He hasn’t realised the fact I’ve already beaten him yet.”
Cyno gasped dramatically, only pausing his theatrics long enough to grab some food, eat it, and swallow. “You did not! The match is still on.”
Tighnari just raised a challenging eyebrow. “Check what card I just played.”
And while Cyno cried out dramatically as if the world was ending, Nahida turned to both roommates with a small laugh and a pita pocket she’d snatched off the table. “But seriously, I don’t take offense to it. I prefer not to read people’s minds at all if I can help it, but some people are just too interesting to ignore.”
“That’s fine, Dendro Archon,” Kaveh managed. “I would never even dare to speak or even think ill of you.”
Nahida simply shook her head, a fond look of exasperation on her face as she took a bite of her pita pocket just in time for a very dismayed Layla to find out her portion went missing. “You don’t have to address me so formally, Kaveh. Just Nahida is fine.”
“Yes, Kaveh, there is no need to be so formal to everyone all the time,” Alhaitham echoed sarcastically, causing Kaveh to snort and roll his eyes in turn. He almost forgot he was supposed to be feeling sad right about now. How strange.
“Right, and you just decided that overthrowing the corrupt government on a random Tuesday morning was a good idea.” He gave Alhaitham a small jab in the rib to the backdrop of several barks of laughter from their friends, and the tiny smile he received in return spoke volumes. “You have no right to lecture me on how I talk to people when you literally tried to rip out Azar’s throat. I’ve heard the stories.”
Paimon perked up at that one, halfway through stuffing a whole roast chicken in her mouth. It almost looked comical in the way the food didn’t quite fit. “Oh yeah! Paimon was super convinced by it even if we knew it was an act! Paimon had to do her super-duper best not to give us away at the time!”
“How about we retell the story, then?” The Traveler offered, and Kaveh didn’t have it in him to argue. A story sounded fantastic right about now.
Not to mention the slightly warm press of a matching set of rings as a familiar hand entwined with his own just under the table and away from everyone’s view.
Yeah. Maybe he didn’t always feel up to par with the rest of his peers—his friends. Maybe he sometimes still felt like he wasn’t enough, or perhaps just too much. Maybe some days he could barely function as a human person at all. But right now, as he looked around Lambad’s and spotted all of his friends talking and laughing and having fun as their well-deserved dinner was served as the main course of the celebration, he couldn’t quite imagine why he felt that way. And, with Alhaitham’s hand holding his, he couldn’t help but lean into the infectious joy as if it was the warmth of the sun itself, helping a tiny flower flourish and show the world the colours it had kept hidden for so long.
Kaveh raised his wine glass with a bright grin on his face, and today didn’t feel quite as daunting anymore. “In that case, cheers everyone! Here’s to a completed project, and several more to come!”