Work Text:
The combination of Ray’s persistence, Patrick’s people pleasing tendencies, and Stevie’s offer to help at the store lead to the current situation: Patrick playing Santa at Ray’s Christmas Tree farm.
Every day, a couple hours before closing, Patrick would head to the back room to don his Santa costume and leave out the back door. On Christmas Eve, David couldn’t resist having a little fun. He quietly pushed through the curtain to find Patrick sitting, turned away from him, adjusting his hat and beard. David snuck closer and lowered himself onto Patrick’s lap while murmuring, “Have I been a naughty boy this year, Santa?”
He leaned in for a kiss, and- “Ohmygod! Clint!” He jumped out of his father-in-law’s lap.
A surprised Clint stood and cleared his throat. “Hello, David.”
“Um, I’m so sorry about that! Where’s Patrick?!”
“I was in the bathroom,” Patrick replied as he joined them. “What’s going on back here?”
David and Clint shared a look before David offered, “N-nothing. Uh, why exactly is your dad wearing this and not you?”
“Because Ray roped Stevie into filling in as an elf. I couldn’t leave you alone to close, so he offered to play Santa since he’s in town. Mom's joining him as Mrs. Claus."
“Yep,” Clint replied. “Just have to find my naughty and nice list, and I’ll be on my way.”
David tried not to immediately die when Clint winked at him.
“Have fun, dad!”
“Clint, can you please get a picture of Stevie? I’m gonna need that for future blackmail!”
“Sure thing. See ya later boys.”
—---
“So, what’d I miss? Did you think it was me back here and make a joke about Santa coming tonight?”
“Worse.”
“What?!”
“I sat on his lap and asked if I was a naughty boy!”
“Oh my god!”