Chapter Text
Logan trudged impatiently back and forth and looked by turn at the watch and the closed door. He growled when the minute hand hadn't moved, in spite of the feeling that it had been hours since he last looked at it. Maybe the watch was broken? No, he could hear it ticking. Why did it take so long? Why didn't they tell him anything? They had been in there for hours now. Every time he walked past the door he could hear her gasping and half screaming in pain.
Suddenly a heart-rending scream went through the wood the door was made of.
"That's it! I'm going in there!" he said, reaching for the door handle.
"Logan," Professor X said. "Having you breaking in there will only make everything worse for her."
Logan clenched his fist. "This makes me crazy! How long can it take?"
"You could almost believe, that you have never tried this before," Scott grinned. You would rarely see the Wolverine this edgy, and it was actually fun to watch the big guy pacing around in circles like that. It was like watching an animal pacing around its cage.
Logan opened his mouth as the adamantium claws were bared between his fingers.
But before he could wipe off that stupid smirk, for the one-eyed man's face, another scream sounded behind the door. Logan instantly turned his attention back to her, forgetting everything about Scott's stupid comment. He had to grit his teeth and endure, to not break the door down and… and what? What could he possibly do to help her? He hated the idea of being useless!
"Come on, Wolvie, she couldn't possibly be in better hands," Jubilee said. "Beast knows what he is doing and with Storm in there, it just can't go wrong."
"Jubilee is right, Logan. I suggest that you go out and get some air," the Professor said. You didn't need to be psychic to know that Logan was on the edge of cutting something or someone to pieces.
"But what if…?"
"I will let you know as soon as anything new happens. Now go."
Much against his will and instincts he walked down the hall and outside. The need to help her was beating in his heart, and the fact, that he could not it, only made it worse.
It was his fault that she was going through this painful hell, right now. He would give anything, anything at all, to be the one going through the hours of agony instead of her.
Logan ran his hands through his hair and crouched down beside the lake. He had to think of something else. Just something... But his stupid brain kept bringing him back to reason, behind her pain.
He remembered the day he had decided to go back to the mansion when he had realized that visiting the island wouldn't help him get his memory, back - or at least some of it - and hoped that the Professor could help him as he had promised more than three years ago.
o*o*o*
When Logan returned to the mansion, he was greeted by both happy and not-so-happy faces. It didn't take him long to find the Professor, who was in the Cerebro searching for the mutant who had attacked the president, not that long ago.
The Professor explained that he couldn't help him. At least not now for some reason, but he was more than welcome to stay at the mansion, which Logan agreed to. He knew that there wouldn't come anything good from trying to push the old man, even though it really pissed him off. Besides, the Professor found the location of the mutant and left Cerebro to send Storm and Jean after him.
He was on packing his few belongings, in his old room, when someone knocked on his door. "Yeah," he called out.
Storm walked in, closing the door behind her.
"I thought you already left," Logan said. "Weren't you supposed hunt down that new mutant?"
"We're not going to 'hunt him down'" Storm said, patiently. "We're going to talk to him and convince him to come back here and meet the Professor."
"Right," Logan mumbled.
"But I wanted to talk to you, before Jean and I leave."
"Yeah, about what?" Logan asked, crossing his arms.
"You see, I'm a little worried about Rogue," she explained.
Now Logan thought about it, he had actually expected her to be the first to welcome him back, but he hadn't seen her yet. He figured that she was busy with new friends, homework, and other stuff you would do at school.
"She is dating Bobby Drake now, but I'm not sure that it is, that good between them; I have seen her cry plenty of times, despite she is trying to hide it," Storm said.
That immediately set off an alarm in Logan's guts. Just the thought of somebody hurting Marie, made him want to chase down the sucker and make him cry.
"I had hoped that you maybe could talk to her?" Storm said, snapping him out of his little fantasy.
"Me? Now I don't know if you have noticed it but I'm not really the type who does girl-talking."
"I know that, Logan," Storm sighed. "But you two have a special bond together. I was thinking that she would open more up to you."
"Well I can't promise anything, but I'll try."
That seemed to be enough for the weather-witch as she left his room with a nod.
Logan remembered the scared little girl, who he had met at the bar. Sometimes he thought about what would have happened to her if he had just left her on the road? That would have meant that he would never have fought against Sabertooth or had come to the school, and they would never have gotten `their special bond´ as Storm had mentioned.
He decided to pay his little girlfriend a visit. He soon found her sweet scent, which led him to the same room she had got, when they arrived here.
When the door opened, he was surprised to see how much she had changed. She was no longer the little lonely girl he had picked up on the street. She had grown into a young woman. Had he really been gone for so long that she could have managed to evolve that much? She had got shapes and her hair was styled in a ponytail with the two white stripes free.
Her eyes instantly lit up, when she saw him. "Logan! You're back," she smiled and hugged him, making sure that there was no skin contact.
"Missed me, kid?" he chuckled, hugging her back.
"Nah not really."
She invited him inside, and they sat down to talk. "It's so good to see you," she said. "How have you been?"
"I've been okay," he answered. "How about you, how are you doing?"
"Oh, I'm fine," she said quickly.
"No, you're not." He had been able to see it the second he saw her and he could smell the dried-out tears: she had been crying. he might as well skip the small-talk and count right to the chase. "Is this because of this Drake-boy?"
Rogue didn't answer but tried to avoid eye contact.
"What did he do?" Logan asked, suppressing a growl.
"He didn't do anything!" she answered. "But… after we began to date, I have started training to get control of my powers. When I concentrate hard enough, I can actually touch people without hurting them! But not for too long… It depends on how I'm feeling at the time… The more I practice, the better I get, but it's too slow."
"Did he say that?"
"No, not to my face, but I know that he is thinking it. I'm afraid to touch him," she said quietly. "Last week I was holding his hand without a glove... At the first it was fine, but then we started arguing and suddenly he was hyperventilating. If I hadn't let go in time… I kept my gloves on after that. He wanted to try again today. I tried my best, but the same thing happened…"
Logan felt his anger awake again. Most of all he wanted to let the Drake-boy taste the adamantium claws, but he knew that it would just hurt Rogue even more. He wanted to tell her to dump him right away, but he also knew that Bobby pretty much had been the only one, who wasn't scared of her after what happened the first night they were here. "
That wasn't your fault, kid," he said instead. "You were nervous, of course, you couldn't control it." He knew that he probably wasn't the first person to tell her that, but for some reason, it still seemed to wash away, at least some of the guilt painted on her face.
"You really think so?" she asked quietly.
"Yeah. If you just relax, I'm sure you can do it." She did not seem to be convinced, so he reached his hand towards her. "Here. Try."
"No. I don't want to hurt you."
"You won't. Just relax and concentrate."
Rogue hesitated, but then she pulled off her glove, breathed deeply a couple of times, and looked him in the eyes before carefully touching his palm with her index finger. Nothing happened and when she realized that, she smiled and let him grab her hand.
"Told you so, kid." He grinned. They both laughed as they held each other's hands. For the first time, they were able to touch, without Logan getting hurt. It was… nice. he slowly moved his thumb across the back of her hand. He caressed it like he had wanted to do to her cheek, the day he left her here.
"Rogue?" a voice said from the door, which had been opened without they had noticed.
"Bobby!" she gasped.
"Dammit!" Logan gasped as he suddenly felt all of his powers leaving him through his hand.
Rogue quickly let go and he fell down from the chair. "Oh my God, Logan I'm so sorry!" she said as she helped him back to his feet.
"It's okay. I'm fine," He said despite being pretty fuzzy.
Logan looked at Bobby, who looked back at him. The boy obviously tried to look intimidating, but even with the dizziness clouding his vision, Logan could still see right through the facade. "Well, I suppose I should leave you two alone," he mumbled. He turned to Marie. "I'll see you later, darling."
On his way back to his room, he couldn't help thinking that it was weird: the last times he touched her, it had knocked him out cold for hours.
o*o*o*
"I'm really sorry about what happened yesterday," Marie said when he met her in the halls the following day.
"Don't be. I'm fine." He laid a hand on her shoulder to show her that he wasn't scared of her. At first, she stiffened, but then she relaxed under his touch and smiled to him. but Logan only had to look into her eyes for a few seconds, before he saw the sadness in them.
"Marie," he said in a quiet voice, in case she didn't want anyone else to hear her real name. "You will be able to touch."
She just nodded, as small tears, were forming in the corner of her eyes. Logan pulled into the nears room, and sat her down on a couch beside him. he wrapped an arm around her shoulders and let her cry quietly.
She then tould him how mad Bobby had gotten, because she had been holding Logan's hand yesterday, and kept accusing her of losing control on purpose.
"Want me to talk to him?"
"No, it's okay. All couples have their problems, right?" she said. She sounded so full of hope.
"Yes but…" Before he managed to say anymore, Cyclops showed up much to Logan's annoyance. That guy had a habit of showing up at the wrong times.
"Hey Rogue, the training starts in ten minutes."
"Training?" Logan asked.
"Yeah. I'm training to become an X-man. Do you wanna join us?"
He didn't really have anything important to do so he said yes. He was surprised to see how good she had become at defending herself compared to the time he had saved her from Magneto.
For the next couple of days, he and Rogue spend a lot of time together. He would help her with the training and control her powers, and when he was in a bad mood, she could somehow always cheer him up again. He also taught her how to ride a motorcycle, realizing that the girl had a taste for speed.
Some nights, she would even come to his room, and they would watch a movie, of her choice. Mostly she would choose a movie, she believed would fall in Logan's taste, about action and speed, but sometimes she would also show movies from her childhood, which he found surprisingly amusing.
o*o*o*
Logan was on his way to the stairs in the morning when he noticed Rogue's smell and someone else he was pretty sure was Kitty Pryde.
Something in his guts told him to stop when he heard Kitty asking: "Hey, Rogue, got a minute?"
"Well yeah," she answered. "It's about Bobby. I think he has felt a little neglected lately."
"Neglected? What are you talking about?"
"Ever since Logan came back, you have been hanging more out with him, than with your actual boyfriend."
Logan walked closer, to where he was able to see them over the banisters.
"What? What makes you say that?" Rogue asked.
"Bobby. He told me, and asked me to talk to you."
"Why would he come to you?" Rogue asked and crossed her arms. She knew that Bobby and Kitty always had been good friends, but it still didn't seem like something he should be discussing with her.
"Well, I don't know, Rogue, maybe because you are way too busy hanging out with Logan instead of thinking of how your boyfriend feels!"
"But…" It was clear that Rogue hadn't been prepared for this.
How much longer was she going to put up with that ice-cubes tricks?
"I really can't see what should be wrong with being friends with Logan?" Rogue finally said.
"Rogue…" Kitty sighed. "The only reason he is spending time with you is that Storm asked him to."
"What…?" Her voice was so low, that it was almost a whisper, but that was quickly changed: "That's not true!"
"Yes, it is. I overheard their conversation. Well, my point is that if you don't want to give Bobby the attention he deserves, then there are plenty of other girls, who would love…" Before Kitty managed to say anymore, he could hear Rogues footsteps running up the stairs.
"Logan…" she gasped stopping in front of him. "Did you hear…?"
"Yeah…" he admitted.
"So is it true? Did Storm really ask you to keep an eye on me?"
He knew he shouldn't lie to her. "Yeah, she did. She was worried about you, but…"
"I see. Thanks for the concern!" she snapped and ran past him up the stairs.
"Dammit, Rogue, wait!" he tried, but she was already gone.
Dammit! Why did Kitty absolutely have to tell her that? Yes, Storm had asked him to talk to her, but so what? It didn't mean, that he didn't consider her as his friend…
Later that day, he heard that Bobby had been hospitalized after Rogue had lost control. Logan wanted to talk to her, but she was probably with Bobby and he should leave them alone.
But later he walked past her door he could hear her crying.
"Rogue?" he asked as he knocked. She didn't answer but he still grabbed the doorknob, which was cold as ice. He had to push hard to get the door open and quickly grabbed onto the doorframe when he almost sleds on the floor, which was covered in ice.
Rogue was standing by the bed, packing her suitcase.
"Where are you going, kid?" he asked when he had managed to gain his foothold.
"Why? Did Storm tell you to ask me?"
"No… knock that off, would you?"
She didn't answer. Instead, she closed her suitcase.
"Are you gonna tell me where you are going?" he asked again.
She stopped in front of her closet, where only her green jacket was left. "Stop. Just stop. Stop pretending that you care about me."
"Now what's that supposed to mean?" Why was she acting this way? "You know that I care…"
She turned around and gave him a death glare. "Oh really? You left me here for three years, Logan. Three whole years, where I didn't hear a damn thing from you. Then you finally show up and the only reason you are spending time with me is because someone asked you to do it." While she was talking, the ground under her feet was frozen, ice spreading across the floor making the room even colder. "In the time you were gone, I kept telling myself, that you would come back, as you promised. You wouldn't just abandon me. And then, when you finally show up… I thought you were different Logan." Her eyes were getting wet. "But you are just like every other guy; a stupid, selfish, pig…"
He held a straight face, but her words hurt him more than he thought they would do.
She finally started crying for real, covering her face with her hands.
Logan wasn't sure if he was supposed to leave, but then he remembered the day she had tried to run away from the mansion after they almost killed each other, and he walked over and put his arms around her in a hug.
"I'm sorry," she cried against his shoulder. "I'm.. I'm so sorry Logan… I..I didn't mean to…"
"It's okay," he promised. "It's okay."
He let her cry all she needed and when she finally was done, the temperature in the room had risen at least five degrees.
"Now will you tell me what's going on?"
She sighed. "Bobby has been pushing me. A lot actually, more than I have let you know. Today, he wouldn't wait any longer, and suddenly… He said that he wanted me to prove that I really loved him... and then he kissed me. I tried, but couldn't control it and… now he is in a coma." She remembered the feeling of Bobby tightening his grip on her arms, while his powers and memories floated into her. He was out cold when she managed to push him away.
Logan didn't say anything. Even though he knew that this must bring back a lot of awful memories, something told him that it wasn't what made her this upset.
Rogue took a deep breath. "I got his memories and I saw… oh god how could I be so stupid… I knew they were friends… I thought that was all… but… I saw them together last night." She clutched her head, trying to suppress the memory, which kept replaying in her head.
Logan was going to cruch that Ice-prick! But right now he had to take care of his girl. "If he is that stupid he doesn't deserve you."
"Yeah, right." She rolled her eyes and looked away.
"Look at me. Marie, look at me."
Her eyes finally met his.
"Marie, he is the stupid one. You, however, are a great, intelligent, sweet, caring girl, and if Bobby can't see that, then it's his loss."
Red spread across her cheeks, but she tried to ignore it. "Do you really mean that, or are you just saying it to make me feel better?"
"I mean it, Marie. Besides: you deserve much better than him."
"Thank you." She leaned towards him and hugged him.
It felt good that he could finally be there for her and make her happy…
Suddenly it knocked on the door, and Storm came in before they managed to let go of each other.
"Oh, I'm sorry," she said, without seeming that surprised. "I just wanted to make sure, that you were okay, Rogue. But it seems like you are in good hands." She closed the door again with a smile.