Chapter Text
Pitt Crew, 12:01 PM
Trinity: lmao Huck just woke up what did you guys do to him yesterday
Dennis: I WAS SLEEPY
Dennis: and SOMEONE wanted to play video games so I didn’t get to bed til like midnight
Dennis: so hows about you shut up
Victoria: I woke up at like 10:30 and went to bed at like 8 pm
Cassie: lucky, I had to wake up to take Harrison to school and couldn’t fall asleep again after
Robby: Good sleep is important.
Dennis: ok dad
Jack: Says the guy working on his day off
Robby: No comment.
Pitt Crew, 4:35 PM
Jack: EVERYONE YOU WILL NEVER BELIEVE WHAT JUST HAPPENED
Robby: Please don’t.
Robby: I will jump off the roof.
Dennis: well now I need to know
Mel: ???
Dana: What did you do this time Mike?
Trinity: I am on the edge of my seat rn
Victoria: omg did he punch someone
Samira: no no he wouldn’t do that during a shift
Samira: maybe he snapped a Gloria again
Cassie: guys it’s something embarrassing not cool
Cassie: maybe he walked into a glass door or something
Frank: maybe Jack should just tell us we don’t have to guess
Jack: I’m actually enjoying you guys theorizing
Mel: nooo tell us!!!
Jack: Okay okay
Jack: So, a patient was talking about her kids
Jack: And she asks Robby is he has any
Robby: I am climbing the stairs to the roof now.
Robby: This is your fault.
Jack: No you’re not I can see you from across the ED
Robby: You are so lucky I won’t attack you.
Frank: enough stalling!!!
Trinity: YEAH
Jack: Sorry
Jack: Robby immediately goes, yeah I have eight
Victoria: EIGHT?!?
Dennis: WHERE ARE YOU HIDING EIGHT KIDS?!?
Dana: What?
Frank: EXCUSE ME
Samira: oh my god
Heather: huh?
Jack: This lady’s eyes went so wide
Jack: Robby started spluttering
Jack: “It feels like. No, I don’t actually have kids I just have protégés.”
Trinity: YOU MEANT US?!?
Mel: awwww
Dana: Oh Robby.
Robby: It slipped out.
Frank: holy fucking shit
Dennis: !!!
Mel: wait
Mel: me, Dennis, Frank, Trinity, Samira, Victoria, Cassie
Mel: that’s 7
Mel: unless you count Heather
Frank: it’s really weird if you count Heather
Robby: What? No!
Robby: Eighth is Jake,
Mel: ohhhhh
Frank: lmao Jake would HATE being looped in as a protege
Trinity: bro adopted us with asking
Dennis: I know right
Cassie: yeah I already have a cool dad I don’t need a lame one 😝
Frank: you do realize you’re the outlier here
Cassie: not my problem
Mateo: you can’t all have shitty dads
Mel: well yeah some of our dads are dead Mateo
Samira: exactly!
Mateo: ok well now I feel bad
Trinity: omg daddy issues sharing circle
Dana: Jesus christ.
Robby: The roof is sounding better and better every minute.
Dennis: what you wanna leave Mel and Samira with two dead dads?
Dennis: the audacity
Robby: Oh my god.
Jack: This is my favorite day ever
Pitt Crew, 6:32 PM
Mel: Becca wants to know if she counts as one of Robby’s kids
Trinity: LMAO
Dennis: yesss omg
Victoria: father of nine. father of nine. father of nine. father of nine.
Robby: What have I gotten myself into?
Mel: give me an answer Robby
Robby: Fuck my life.
Robby: Yes, Becca can count.
Mel: YAYYYY
Pitt Crew, 7:21 PM
Trinity: for research purposes, what’s our straight to gay ratio
Dennis: I TOLD YOU NOT TO FUCKING ASK THAT
Dana: What exactly do you mean by this question?
Samira: ???
Trinity: like how many of us are straight
Trinity: my bet was four
Jack: WHICH FOUR?!
Trinity: I’m not in the business of making my assumptions public
Trinity: also if you’re not straight you don’t actually have to tell me I’m mostly just curious
Dennis: she won’t make her assumptions public but she’ll talk my ear off for like half an hour about this shit
Cassie: this is an insane conversation
Victoria: actually I think this is a great conversation
Victoria: I wanna make pride flag bracelets for everyone
Mel: awww!
Trinity: yeah everyone should just put your flags in emojis
Trinity: 🩷🧡🤍🧡🩷
Mel: 🩷🧡🤍🧡🩷 🖤🩶🤍💜
Samira: 🧡💛🤍🩵💙 🩶🩷🤍🩷🩶
Victoria: 💛🩷💙
Robby: How do I do this?
Jack: Find the emoji hearts and put your flag colors with them
Jack: 🩷💜💙
Dana: What do I do if I’m straight?
Trinity: uhhh
Trinity: just a red heart ig
Dana: ❤️ 😁
Dennis: 💙🩵🤍🩵💙
Mateo: 🩵🩷🤍🩷🩵 🩷💜💙
Collins: ❤️
Robby: 🩷💜💙
Robby: I figured it out!
Cassie: 🩷🧡🤍🧡🩷
Frank: uhhh
Frank: is it ok to say I actually have no fucking clue
Mel: of course!!
Trinity: yeah it’s whatever this is just for fun don’t worry about it
Frank: cool
Frank: I think I’m somewhere in the middle, so I guess count me towards the queer people
Trinity: well fuck my numbers were so off
Trinity: Frank and Samira really threw me off ig
Samira: literally how dare you assume I like anyone
Samira: (kidding)
Trinity: ughhh my mind is still heteronormative
Trinity: I’m better than Dennis tho
Dennis: why am I catching strays?!
Trinity: dude you thought Cassie was straight
Dennis: she has a son!
Cassie: can’t a girl have a late in life sexuality crisis? Smh
Cassie: (sarcasm)
Dennis: listen I didn’t even know that there was more than one way to be queer until four years ago
Victoria: omg you’re a baby gay!
Dennis: YOU ARE A LITERAL BABY
Victoria: I am twenty years old!
Frank: in other words, a baby
Victoria: you have an actual baby!
Frank: so?
Victoria: Mateo is 22! You never call him a baby!
Mateo: everyone knows you become a not baby at 22
Trinity: EW MATEO’S DATING A BABY
Mateo: NO NO
Mateo: I RESCIND MY STATEMENT
Mel: lol
Pitt Crew, 9:32 PM
Frank: has anyone seen Doctor Odyssey
Trinity: ITS ONLY THE CRAZIEST MED DRAMA EVER
Frank: WHY DO THEY HAVE A CT MACHINE ON THE FUCKING BOAT
Dennis: dude wait until you get the the threesome episode
Frank: the WHAT
Cassie: ugh shitty med dramas my beloved
Samira: scrubs is my guilty pleasure
Dennis: Trin introduced me to Greys and I think that ones actually so wild
Heather: yeah! How do they have time for all that?!
Trinity: surgeons are hot :))) gotta make time
Dennis: STOP
Frank: no guys what the FUCK do you mean threesome episode
Trinity: 👀
Dennis: 👀
Pitt Crew, 6:32 AM
Robby: Just got an email from Gloria telling me to not call the ED the Pitt again.
Jack: This is your sign to only refer to it as the Pitt for the entirety of your shift
Trinity: aye aye captains
Frank: 🫡
Cassie: 🫡
Mateo: 🫡
Heather: yes I shall call my clinic The Pitt
Heather: confusing everyone around me
Jack: That’s the spirit
Pitt Crew, 7:37 PM
Robby added Baran Al-Hashimi
Samira: Doctor Al!!!
Trinity: yesss join us
Baran: Hello?
Baran: What is this?
Mel: you have achieved full pitt status
Frank: 🎉🎉
Jack: Welcome madame
Dennis: hiiiii
Cassie: hello stepmother
Trinity: LMAO
Mateo: oh-
Baran: Excuse me?
Robby: What?!
Robby: What would make her your stepmother?!
Cassie: because she’s stepping up while you’re gone
Frank: mother who stepped up!!!
Jack: Lol
Dana: Oh my…
Baran: I am still confused.
Robby: Please ignore the kids, they are being weird.
Heather: I haven’t met you, Dr. Al, but I advise you run while you still can
Samira: nooo don’t leave us you’ll give us mommy issues
Trinity: ha! too late I already have those
Dennis: we can tell
Trinity: you have them too dweeb
Dennis: 😝
Victoria: mommy issues? I know her well
Cassie: jesus christ guys
Dana: This is a group chat with some of the day shift Pitt staff. Robby accidentally called the kids “my kids” and he will never live it down.
Baran: I see.
Baran: Who are Heather and Jack? I don’t recognize the names.
Heather: I’m Dr. Heather Collins, I used to work at the Pitt but I moved to Seattle
Heather: They won’t let me leave
Jack: Dr Jack Abbot, chief night shift attending
Baran: I see.
Baran: I thought this was for day shift?
Jack: I have husband privileges :)
Dennis: night shift dad!
Mel: exactly ^^^
Jack: Awww that’s sweet, love you kiddos
Victoria: daddy issues curing by the second
Baran: Wait, whose husband are you?
Robby: Mine
Jack: Mikey’s
Baran: Oh!
Baran: I understand now.
Dennis: TRINITY STOLE MY SWEATER
Trinity: I am letting you live in my apartment I deserve this sweater
Dennis: that is stupid logic
Frank: nah that logic makes sense
Mel: Frank and Trin agreeing on something?!?
Samira: ikr!!! The world must be ending
Frank: oh sorry
Frank: you’re logic makes sense asshole
Trinity: thanks dickhead
Dennis: 🤯
Baran: You people are so weird.
Jack: Yup
Dana: You will get used to it.
Pitt Crew, 8:01 PM
Victoria: ughhhh can I stay at someones tonight?
Robby: Is everything alright?
Jack: Are you okay?
Trinity: !!! you good?
Victoria: yeah I just need to avoid my parents today
Victoria: I got a “be a surgeon” lecture this morning
Robby: Jake is in his room tonight, but our couch is open.
Trinity: so is ours!
Dennis: Vic do not come to our house Garcia is here
Trinity: oh my god we are NOT that bad
Dennis: FREE ME
Cassie: Harrison has been asking to see you if you wanna come to mine
Victoria: decisions decisions
Victoria: I do miss Har…
Cassie: he just got that new lego game
Victoria: I am so THERE
Victoria: can you come get me from the library tho
Cassie: omw girlie
Mateo: straight up kidnapping my girlfriend :((
Victoria: you are working night shift :(((
Mateo: don’t remind me
Jack: Get back to work Nurse Diaz
Mateo: you’re not my boss 😝
Dana: Get back to work Nurse Diaz.
Mateo: ugh fineeee
Pitt Crew, 8:31 PM
Frank: OK I GOT TO THE THREESOME EPISODE
Baran: Excuse me?!
Trinity: LMAO
Dennis: HA HA
Cassie: oh my god
Frank: that was crazy tonal whiplash
Trinity: oh yeah
Jack: Maybe I should watch this show…
Baran: What are we talking about?
Heather: The tv show Dr Odyssey
Baran: Ah.
Trinity: langdon it gets wilder
Frank: !!
Frank: how?!?
Dennis: you’ll just have to find out 👀
Frank: ffs
Pitt Crew, 9:01 PM
Victoria: I beat Har, Cassie and Cassie’s dad in lego party!!!
Cassie: rigged
Mel: get em vic
Samira: Vic is short for Victory
Trinity: the montreal victoire?!?!?
Dennis: NOT EVERYTHING IS ABOUT HOCKEY
Trinity: not with that attitude it isn’t
Frank: YOU LIKE HOCKEY?!?
Trinity: ya
Trinity: I straight up play on a team my guy
Frank: I love hockey!
Frank: I haven’t played since before my injury but I have penguins season tickets
Trinity: !!!
Trinity: I’m gonna steal those
Frank: I have three seats if you wanna come to a game with me and Yolo
Trinity: …
Trinity: why are you being nice to me
Samira: 🍿🍿🍿
Cassie: 🍿🍿🍿
Frank: I have been working very hard in therapy☝️
Frank: also Yolanda yelled at me :/
Trinity: she’s so hot
Frank: ok don’t push it
Dennis: this is fucking crazy
Baran: Am I missing something?
Jack: You are missing a lot
Baran: I’m not gonna get filled in, am I?
Jack: Nope
Samira: she’s learning!
Pitt Crew, 6:21 AM
Jack: Oh man you guys have some wild cases coming today
Samira: well now I’m scared
Victoria: ok ominous
Trinity: ???
Mel: uh oh
Jack: I can’t wait be done :)
Mateo: Dr Abbot’s been on his leg the whole shift!
Robby: Jonathan Abbot!
Trinity: oooooh you’re in troubleeeee
Dennis: 🍿🍿
Jack: Mateo, what the fuck man?!
Mateo: Dana told us all we need to tell Robby if you pass ten hours with no breaks
Jack: Dana, what the fuck girl?!
Dana: It’s my job to take care of you, you dickhead.
Robby: If you do not get on your crutches or sit down in the next ten seconds I will throw myself off the roof.
Baran: What?!
Jack: Ok ok I will sit and do charting
Robby: Good.
Jack: This is ableism
Dennis: yeah telling you to take care of yourself is ableism
Mel: we should start a “attendings hypocrisy” counter
Trinity: literally
Jack: I’m unadopting you all
Pitt Crew, 2:12 PM
Frank: Donnie is pissed he’s not on the groupchat
Victoria: oh my gods how did we forget him
Mel: why isn’t he on here?
Jack: Oh no! I think we totally forgot about him because this one got made while he was on pat leave
Frank added Donnie
Donnie: I am very disappointed in all of you!
Samira: to be fair, this was originally a doctors chat
Mateo: classic doctors
Donnie: tsk tsk
Baran: Hello Donahue!
Trinity: aren’t you two in chairs? How the fuck do you have time for this conversation
Frank: we’re on break
Cassie: they’re sitting in the staff room showing each other pictures of their kids
Mel: WAIT I WANT TANNER AND PENNY PHOTOS
Samira: you saw them yesterday
Robby: Do your charting Dr King.
Mel: did I just see you walk into the staff room?
Robby: I wanna see pictures of my grandkids.
Jack: Lucky bastard