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Kaveh storms into the apartment, slamming the front door. He throws his briefcase onto the floor and huffs angrily.
Alhaitham lowers his book with a sigh. "What have I done now?"
"I talked to Tighnari today," Kaveh says, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Mhmm."
"He told me something interesting."
"Did he?"
Kaveh lets out another huff. "You think you're so clever, don't you?"
"Most of the time," Alhaitham replies. He makes the mistake of looking back down at his book. He was in the middle of a sentence.
Kaveh stomps over, forcibly lowering the book. Alhaitham looks up to his glare, the one that means he's really pissed. Shit.
"Can't you just tell me why you're mad for once instead of making me guess?" he asks.
"You'd like that, wouldn't you?"
Alhaitham exhales through his nose and sets the book down. "Babe-" he starts, but Kaveh immediately cuts him off.
"Don't you 'babe' me!" he returns heatedly. "You know exactly what you did. You've been doing it for three years."
Doing some quick math in his head, Alhaitham says, "So this is from before the wedding?"
"Oh, yes," says Kaveh, his eyes flashing. "About six months before."
He proposed about six months before the wedding. He thinks on it, trying to figure out if there was anything about the proposal Kaveh could possibly be mad about. It suddenly clicks.
"Oh," he says. He crosses his arms, too. "So Cyno ratted me out."
"Yes, he did." Kaveh smiles in that tense, angry way he does sometimes. "Were you ever going to tell me?"
"Why would I do that?"
Kaveh sighs and rolls his eyes. "I don't know why I expected better of you. I thought it was so romantic at the time. What a fool I was."
Alhaitham grabs Kaveh's wrists, pulling him down onto his lap. "C'mon, babe," he says. "I was just being practical."
"No!" says Kaveh, smacking him and standing back up. "You're in trouble right now."
"Are you going to make me sleep on the couch for this?"
"Maybe I should," Kaveh snaps.
Alhaitham surges up and grabs Kaveh by the waist this time, dragging him down onto the sofa. He pins him there and starts mouthing at his neck.
"Alhaitham! Stop!" Kaveh demands, smacking him again.
He doesn't. He sucks a bruise over Kaveh's skin instead, and his husband gasps. He grabs Alhaitham by the hair, pulling him back.
"You're not getting out of this," he says firmly.
"Shut up," Alhaitham replies, pressing a heated, open-mouthed kiss to his lips.
Kaveh continues to protest, but Alhaitham manages to wrangle him into bed. This is how most of their arguments are resolved. In Alhaitham's defense, it's a very effective method.
Afterward, when Alhaitham's spooning him in bed, Kaveh huffs again and mutters, "I can't believe you."
"It's not even that bad."
Kaveh flips around in his arms with an affronted look. "You proposed two days after Valentine's Day just so you could buy discounted chocolates and flowers on the anniversary instead of celebrating the holiday. And then you bragged about it."
"It was a clever tactical decision. It's my right to be proud of that."
His glare softens into something fond. "You're such an idiot. If you hadn't said anything, I never would've known!"
Alhaitham shrugs. "I got cocky. That's my only mistake here."
Kaveh rolls his eyes. He turns back around, settling into Alhaitham's arms. "Asshole," he mumbles.
"Guilty," Alhaitham replies. He presses a kiss to Kaveh's spine and says, "Love you."
With a deep sigh, Kaveh says, "I love you, too." A few minutes later, he adds, "You're still sleeping on the couch."
"No, I'm not."
"Yes, you are."
"No. You'll wake up in the middle of the night and miss me and tell me to come back to bed anyway."
"So?"
Alhaitham chuckles. His tightens his embrace, holding Kaveh close.
He doesn't end up sleeping on the couch.