Chapter Text
The cold light fell across the bathroom, causing a small glare against the mirror. The room was a bright yellow with only small stains from moisture. However, it looked relatively gray under the overcast lighting from outside. He lazily took another puff and hanged his arm over the edge of the bathtub and sunk in a little farther, the water caressing the ends of his soft, brown hair.
How hallow. It made him cold. How hallow. He never took those sappy rom com or tragedies to heart, but it was a literal tear inside himself. He felt like he had whiplash. He had had everything.
Well not everything, he didn’t have a steady 40k job, still in college debt, worrying about finals and what to do with himself. But he had had more than enough. He had loved someone, realized that despite flaws he was loved and that he could love someone too. He had been so perfect, fun and oh so sweet, tasting like cherry syrup. He had felt like it was always yellow, always bright and warm, like nothing could go wrong. But like most shitty romantics narratives, he was gone. It wasn’t a fight where words were thrown like daggers at each other, or an argument where tears burned down your cheeks and closed your throat. It came in like a sickness, one he never saw the symptoms of. It was a quiet sigh and “I can’t keep this up. I don’t feel the same anymore.”
He took another puff.
He wish he had never met him, he hated knowing how it felt to have been in love. And then not to have it . . . He was practically laying fully in the water, calves over the other end of the tub. The water was over his ears. Maybe of he just closed his eyes.
Vvvrrrrrrrrrrrrr
He didn’t move. It stopped and within a few moments it picked back up again. This time he sat up and looked at it for a moment. He was able to force his arm out, setting it down then picking up his phone.
“Lance”
“Yea.”
“Hey man how are –uh how are you isn’t necessarily a good question. But like, better? I know you’re not worst, or at least I hope you aren’t. You’d say- crap. Okay, how are you holding up?”
He didn’t blame them, for stuttering through and sounding unsure. Most of the time Pidge was ten times better with tech than people but they tried and that’s what mattered. His lip twitched up a bit.
“Well enough.”
There was a pregnant silence and Pidge realize he wasn’t going to say more.
“Uhm, okay I.” they sighed. ‘That’s great. Me and Hunk are still on this research trip for another month or so. And we’re just really worried.”
“Pidge, you guys focus on your studies, I’m fine.”
After a beat of silence they asked. “Really? Cause it doesn’t sound like it?”
Another moment of silence. “Yeah. I’m fine.”
“Have you eaten today?”
“Yeah.”
“Have you talked to your mom?”
Silence. “Yeah.”
Doubt. “You did?”
“Yeah.”
They sighed through their nose. “Lance, don’t-ugh. Don’t do this.”
“Pidge.
“No, don’t! Lance you never lie. Don’t lie to me! I got off the phone with your mom earlier, you haven’t called her in days.”
Well.
“I’m fine.”
“No shut up!” There was muffled noise in the back. “You shut up too Hunk! I am not going to baby him!”
“Don’t yell at Hunk, Pidge.’ He sighed. This conversation was starting to exhaust him.
“No, don’t tell me that. Don’t you- I bet you haven’t even eaten!”
“Pidge”
“You haven’t called your mom! I hacked into the system and you didn’t even take your final! Have you done anything except stay in the apartment? Have you gone out at all!?”
“No, alright!” it wasn’t a yell but it was definitely louder than before. “No, is that what you want to hear!? That I don’t even want to go outside! That I’ve been in this bathtub with a joint since who knows when!? Just-ugh look its been a lot but-“
“No don’t. Don’t you dare. Say. Your fine! “ They let out a breathe and just like that Pidge felt the anger go out, their voice significantly softer. “Don’t lie to us, Lance. I’m sorry, I really am but don’t try to lie to us. We just want to help. We’re trying.”
“Pidge, I’m sorry, okay? It’s just . . . its been a lot for me, okay? There I’ll admit it.” The last thing he wanted was to anger Pidge any further.
“Look Hunk and I just want to make sure you’re okay and we want-we want to help. But you got to let us too. That’s what you told me right? To let people in? So, let us help Lance. I know you’re usually the one taking care of people but, just let us?”
On the other side Pidge tried to be patient as they waited for a reply but Lance hardly ever went quiet for so long. It was just more evidence that he wasn’t alright.
“Lance?”
“Yeah, okay Pidge. You can help.”
They sighed in relief. “Okay. So uh, do you remember my friend that knows Matt too? The one out in New York?”
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The spoon scraped the bottom of the carton. The TV muffled out the noise outside but not his thoughts. He twisted up more so he was in more of a slouch position than laying down. Realizing the previous program had changed he reached to the back of the couch for the remote. He meticulously flipped through the TV channels.
He’s not sure how long he went through them but eventually the door of the apartment opened. He glanced up as the older man walked in, gym bag slung across his back. He blinked in surprise. “Hey.”
The other boy pulled the blanket on his lap up a little higher as he glanced to the side. “Yeah, hey”
He seemed to want to say something but opted in setting his bag down. He walked across the room to the other side of the couch to sit. His eyes ran over the TV. “Hhmm, infomercial. Interesting choice.”
“Uh, I was flipping through them.” He mumbled as he began again.
“Keith, if your dropping hints that you really want a 2,000X Bullet Blender for your birthday, consider the message received.” He smiled easily.
“I-uh- no.” After a few moments of silence he sighed “So are you going to say it?”
Shiro looked surprised but then smoothed his expression to one of caution. “Say what?”
He frowned. “How about ‘I told you so’? Or how about ‘What were you thinking leaving for close to a week without calling’? Or even ‘Why do you have a phone if you’re just going to ignor-“
“Keith.” He said firmly as he sat up a bit straighter. “That’s not what I want to say at all.”
Keith tried to swallow down the guilt. “But it’s true.”
Shiro sighed as he ran his fingers through his tuff of white hair. “Look, we can’t change what has happened, okay? Was I pissed that you disappeared on me, yeah. Really pissed off actually. And did I get a bit over reactive when I was texting you or leaving you voicemails, absolutely. Sorry about them, I realize they may have sounded harsh.”
He shook his head but wasn’t looking at him either.
Shiro scooted down the couch further and leaned forward. “But what I want to say more than anything is that I’m happy your back. I’m happy you got back here safe. And that I’m sorry. I’m sorry that happened to you.” He put his arm around the smaller boy.
“But you were right.’ He muttered. “He was a douche. And a jerk, and shithead, and-“
“I know but I really wish I wasn’t. Not about that. No one should go through having someone cheat on them.”
Keith fell against his chest, burying in the warmth as Shiro wrapped his arms around him, the metal one felt just as soothing as the flesh one. “I hate him. It was just supposed to be a fling and I-he just”
“Hey it’s okay. It’s okay to be human.”
After a few moments of silence, in a smaller voice he mumbled. “I’m sorry I ran Shiro. I really am.”
“Don’t worry about it.” He smiled as he put his chin on his head. “But if you do it again I’m going to have Pidge put a tracker on you.”
He laughed. It felt good.
After a moment Shiros phone rang. He took it out of his sweatpants’ pocket and smirked in surprise. “Speak of the Pidge.”
Keith chuckled again.
He slid his finger across the screen and then held it up to his ear. “Hey, what’s up?”
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“Yeah, I know! Don’t worry mom I will call” he shook his head. “Yes, yes I know.”
“Y reza antes de vuolar!”
“Si, ya. Ya se!”
“Cuida te mijo. Y llama, porque si no te voy-”
“Si, vas a venir por mi.” he smiled a bit. “I love you mom.”
“Te quierdo mijo.”
He sighed as he hit the red dot. He pulled his luggage along as he read over the signs. Once past the security check he found his terminal and sat near the windows just as the sun was setting. He couldn’t believe he allowed Pidge to talk him into this but he had agreed to let them help. Heading to another city to stay with a guy he met less than a handful of times and his roommate seemed extremely drastic, even for him.
Once he boarded the plane and was taking off though, he couldn’t help feeling a bit, relieved. Seeing the run way and city shrink down, till it couldn't be seen under the cloud banks, it felt good. He saw the stars begin their journey across the sky as he did his own and smiled. He remembered when he was younger he loved the idea of flying and traveling. Even farther than Earth, to the stars. His mom would joke about how he wouldn’t last long cause he would get lonely, he loved people, and they tended to love him. He argued back that’s why he would have friends up there with him.
It was nice to gather his thoughts among the stars. He slept easier than he thought he would. But once he woke up to the news that they would be landing soon, he began to feel the anxiety he had ignored. What was he doing? What if Shiro didn’t like him, or worse, didn’t even really remember him?! What if his roommate was a creep, or an asshole? Well considering Shiro’s personality and from what Pidge told him he figured that wouldn’t happen. But what if they ended up hating him and regretted doing this? This was probably a mistake, a huge mistake where he’d end up worse than before.
He drummed his fingers on the arm of the chair and glanced outside. Seeing his reflection against the light pink sky he frowned. No, this was going to be fine. He was going to be fine. He was only going to be here till Pidge and Hunk got back then, then he’d make his next move. But till then, he just needed to relax and refresh himself. He glanced down at the city that was around showing swarms of movement. Well New York, take it easy on me , okay?