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teenage dirtbag

Summary:

come with me friday, don't say maybe
'cuz i'm just a teenage dirtbag, baby, like you

"Yeah, so you know how you told me you thought movies sucked and junk?"

Annabeth eyed him dubiously. "Did I say that?"

"No," he said. "But, um, you said you didn't like them. Or that you didn't like Jaws. But there's this movie coming out next month and I thought we could go and watch it together."

Notes:

the show's 8 episode limit makes me so sad so here have a big huge chunk of just meaningless downtime adventures/hangout plus some missing scenes that add stuff to the show either for fluff value or to complement the show with stuff from the books i personally wish the show kept (e.g. the siren scene. you'll see) ANYWAY i'm really excited for s3 to come out and make the main plotline thing completely contradictory to canon lmfao. also i can't wait for s3 in general i think i may die unless someone injects more thalia content directly into my veins. this is set in the show canon but yes as mentioned it does draw on the books for certain elements missing from the show.

also i'm soo sad that the actors are aging way faster than the characters SOB PLEASE imagine the present day characters as more like their s1 versions like before walker's voice dropped this is critical to my artistic vision because they are BABIES. thank you

Work Text:

Percy toyed with the now twin beads around his neck. The two made a fun clicking sound when he tapped them together, and he'd been entertaining himself with that all morning. The new one was painted with the Golden Fleece. Two summers at camp and he'd managed to be a central figure in the 'most important event' of both. He had a feeling that was going to be a pattern.

He'd been sitting here, at the root of Thalia's tree, for a while now, with his bags packed. It was weird to go home without Tyson, but he did miss his bedroom—and his mom. And it would be nice to not have to worry about the fate of the world for a second.

Thinking about being a normal kid made him think of his current plans, the ones that'd had him fidgeting with his camp necklace this whole time. He grimaced. Why was he nervous? He tried to shake it off.

The camp had been abuzz that morning with people saying their goodbyes to the summer, but by now, nearly everyone had gone, so he had no trouble spotting the people he'd been waiting for when they finally appeared at the base of the hill. He stood as the two girls and one satyr approached.

Grover waved. Percy waved back. Thalia was glaring at the tree like it had betrayed her, which was fair enough. The glance she gave Percy wasn't that much kinder. Annabeth's neutral face flickered into something like a smile when she saw Percy. He eagerly returned it.

"Get in touch right away if they do anything, and I mean anything—" Thalia was saying when they reached the top of the hill.

"I know, you already said that," Annabeth said.

"I mean it. I'll come to Virginia, I'll take the Gray Sisters, I don't care."

"I know," Annabeth said emphatically. "I'll be fine. I survived Medusa, I can deal with my stepmom for a couple months."

Thalia nodded uncertainly, and after a beat seized Annabeth in a crushing hug. Annabeth buried herself in Thalia's leather jacket. For all the complicatedness of Thalia's presence, that hug made Percy melt a little inside, just seeing how happy and safe Annabeth looked in it. The whole summer, her and Thalia had been thick as thieves, stuck together like they were afraid that the other would disappear the moment they looked away.

It wasn't like Percy could blame them. Even if he did still feel weird—diplomatically speaking—about Thalia. The feeling seemed to be mutual.

Thalia took a deep breath and blinked hard as they let the hug go. She was still holding Annabeth's shoulders. It was like a mom sending her kid off to college. She cleared her throat and looked toward Percy, nodded a little awkwardly. "And you... stay safe too, kid."

"Thanks," Percy deadpanned, not particularly flattered by her tone of voice. It sounded a little like she was just saying it because she knew she had to say something nice to him.

She gave him another tight-lipped nod, and one for Grover, too, and another for Annabeth—but that one came only after a long moment of looking at her, as if committing her face carefully to memory. Then she gave a two-finger salute and tromped on down towards camp.

"Well," Grover said pretend-excitably. "We've made it this far."

"So far, so good," Percy added, although Thalia's presence had a way of reminding him that the world's existence wasn't a given right then. He reminded himself it wasn't her fault he had the heebie-jeebies about her. Except that it a little bit was.

"Yeah," Annabeth said, eyes a little downcast. "Hey, we'll keep in touch this time, right? More than last year."

"We'll keep in touch," Percy promised. "And we meet here again next year. Renew last year's promise. Right?"

"Right," Grover and Annabeth both confirmed. All three put out their hands and stacked them atop each other between them. They'd never done that before, but it felt right, at least until it didn't.

"Do we do, like, a cheer now?" Percy asked when the moment had gone on a bit long.

"'Go, Camp Halfblood?'" Grover suggested with a crooked grin.

"'Kronos blows'," Percy suggested.

"Y'all are idiots," Annabeth said and withdrew her hand, but she was smiling. She adjusted her backpack. "My dad's probably waiting. So..."

She looked at Percy, and then at Grover, and unspoken all three collapsed into a group hug. That felt much better than the stupid hand thing.

"Go, Camp Halfblood," Percy whispered, and his friends' shoulders shook with laughter.

Before he knew it, he and Annabeth were walking down the hill to where her dad and his mom would be waiting to pick them up. Percy reached up to touch his beads and realised with a start that his window of opportunity was closing.

"Hey, um, Ance?"

Annabeth hummed without turning to look back at him.

"I was thinking if— oh."

At the edge of the trees stood Clarisse with a duffel bag at her feet and a pointy stick in her hands. She gave them a sideways glance.

"Hey," Annabeth said.

"Hmph," Clarisse said.

Percy had known she was a year-rounder because her family lived across the country, so he was briefly confused as to why she was here alone. Maybe she was going to visit someone? Not her family, though. It came to him abruptly that he'd never thought about Clarisse's family before. The idea of her having a mom felt weirdly alien. Like finding out Cyclopes love Frosties cereal.

He cleared his throat before he could start trying to imagine what Clarisse's mom was like. "You alright?"

"I was before you blockheads showed," Clarisse said more out of habit than genuine aggravation.

"That's my ride," Annabeth said gently and nodded to a car parked on the curb. Percy could faintly see the shape of an older man sitting inside, but he couldn't make out the face very well. Percy grit his teeth. The window. Closing. "What was it you wanted to ask?"

He glanced sideward at Clarisse. He wasn't bothered that she was there. Why would he have been bothered about her being there? Annabeth's dad's car was right there and he had to say it now or— "Yeah, so you know how you told me you thought movies sucked and junk?"

Annabeth eyed him dubiously. "Did I say that?"

"No," he said. "But, um, you said you didn't like them. Or that you didn't like Jaws. But there's this movie coming out next month and I thought we could go and watch it together."

He paused for a second to gauge her reaction, but she didn't really have one. Maybe something in her eyes shifted a bit, but that was it.

"It's not a scary movie. It's by this guy Wes Anderson who's done a lot of movies, he's supposed to be really funny and smart, li—" 'Like you?' What?—"Um—I thought you'd maybe like that more. Or maybe the problem was you weren't watching it with friends. So I'd join. It's more fun with friends."

Annabeth nodded, looking soft. "Most things are."

"Yeah," Percy agreed. "So, yeah, I thought if it was okay with your dad, you could come up here for a day sometime, some weekend maybe, and we could go and see it. And if you hate that one, too, then that's fine. We can even dip halfway through, if you want. Sneak out the theatre."

Annabeth studied his face. She had a weird look in her eyes that he remembered seeing a couple times—like in the Arch when the Chimera was chasing them. But she didn't look opposed, as far as he could tell. Carefully, she asked, "Grover's coming too, right?"

Oh, Grover! Percy blinked. Why hadn't he thought about Grover? "Oh, oh yeah, yeah, sure. Yeah. Of course Grover should... Grover should come too. Uh... y'know, if he's not busy."

"Yeah." She nodded. Slowly, her face grew brighter. "...Yeah. I can ask my dad. It'd be nice."

"Yeah? That's great," Percy said. "I— I mean, that's cool. It would be... cool."

"Yeah," Annabeth said. "Late September, right? I'll ask him in the car and Iris-message you when I get home."

"You've got drachmas?"

"Mhm."

"Alright. Great, yeah. I'll talk to Grover. Have a good trip home."

She shot him a smile that was all in her eyes and ducked into her dad's car. Percy stood back to lean against a tree. The Chase car drove off, and she was gone.

"Smooth," Clarisse commented acidically.

"Huh?" Percy turned in time to see her shoot him a vicious side eye, as if saying 'don't play dumb.' He frowned. "What do you mean, 'smooth?'"

Clarisse rolled her eyes and walked off to a shiny blue car that had just rolled up.

"Hey!" Percy called after her. "What do you mean, 'smooth?!'"


"Like this." Annabeth flicked her fingers, and one marble flew across the truck floor and struck the other with a resounding clack. The second one went rolling and bounced off a crate, bouncing from the bumps in the road.

It was late in the night on the road to Vegas. Nobody wanted to sleep yet—it was dark and uncomfortable and it smelled like camel poop. Percy was a little worried about what they'd do if one of the three of them needed to use the bathroom themselves.

Annabeth'd had a bag of marbles in her bag. She'd taken to teaching Percy how to play with them, both kneeling on the truck floor, while Grover debated ethics with a zebra.

"I don't get it," Percy said. Annabeth looked at him like he was dumb.

"It's the trajectory," she said, as if that explained it. She trailed a finger over the path the second marble, currently on its way towards Percy's right shoe, had taken. "It's harder than it looks."

"Okay, let me try." Percy grabbed the wayward marbles and lined them up. How hard could it be?

He flicked the marble with all the force he could. It did an impressive leap over the other one, bounced off a crate edge and smacked him between the eyes. He flailed at the air and managed to knock the marble away so it flew to the side and hit Grover in the shoulder.

"Ahh! Percy!"

Annabeth's whole face scrunched up and she slapped a mouth over her mouth to keep from laughing. Percy grinned joylessly.

"Extra points for that, I assume?" he asked.

"No," Annabeth said.

"Okay," Percy said like this was the most unfair call any referee had ever made. "Maybe it's harder than it looks."

"Yeah," Annabeth said airily. She was looking at him a little weirdly, with her eyes all crinkled with joy. Before he could ask if he had something in his teeth, she scooped up the bag to pour another couple marbles in her palm and asked, "Want to try again?"

"Alright," he said, watching her set up the game again. "This must be how people had fun back when the dinosaurs still roamed the earth."

Annabeth chortled softly. It was almost a kind of whisper. "It's a normal way to have fun, Percy."

"Normal if you grow up at a summer camp without any TVs," he grumbled. "Have you really never seen any movie or even like an episode of a show or anything?"

"Nope. We had a TV, before I ran away, but I... I wasn't allowed to watch anything except really occasionally some cartoons. I saw bits of the news when my dad watched them. But I never really watched it," Annabeth said. In a rare moment of clarity, he realised she sounded self-conscious.

"Well, I mean, that's fine," he said. "I guess lots of people haven't seen things. Like the Amish and stuff."

She looked up at him from under her brows. "Yeah, thanks."

"I love the Amish!" Percy said defensively. "They've got great... hats. And you've got a hat! So you have that in common."

"You're so dumb," she said, smiling. "What are you gonna show me, then?"

It was the best question he'd ever been asked. "Oh my god, so many things. Like, uh, Jaws and Friends, obviously, and—"

"Anything with a name that has two words?"

"What?"

She laughed at her own joke. And it wasn't even funny, he thought, but he was smiling too.


It was early September and Percy was sitting in his room, agonising over a bit of geometry homework, when the air went all fuzzy. The sound of metal wind chimes came, like vibrations on the surface of water, and he turned and—

"Oh, Annabeth!" He was smiling all of a sudden. The Iris message warped her face slightly, like it was passing through a prism, but he could faintly tell she was sitting in bed with a poster of the Parthenon behind her. "Hi."

"Hi," Annabeth said. Her voice was low and breathy, the way you'd talk if you were nervous to be overheard.

"Weekend after next, right?" As if he hadn't been counting down the days. Grover had been hyped when Percy'd asked him to join. It would be so fun. They'd be like a proper friend group.

"Yeah. Listen," Annabeth said. The apprehension on her face finally registered to Percy.

"Is everything okay?" he asked, chair creaking beneath him as he shifted. "Why are you whispering?"

"I'm not," she said. He gave her the same dubious face as she always gave him and she relented. "I don't want to bother my— my family. Just listen, okay?"

"I'm listening," Percy said. Maybe it was serious, a monster attack, or even Luke...

"Can we invite Thalia to the movies with us?" she asked.

Okay, no monsters. Worse. He squeezed his eyes shut before he could help it. Come on.

"Don't be dramatic, Percy," Annabeth said. "She was a tree for a long time, and on the run before that. She's probably got less movie experience than me."

"But she isn't you," he said. "I wanted to show that stuff to you."

"Yeah, and? I'm still gonna be there," she insisted. "I just— I don't know, don't you think she'd like it too?"

"Well, does she have money? Can she pay for a ticket?" Percy asked. Now it was Annabeth's turn to stare questioningly. Which, like, okay, it's not like this had come up with Annabeth herself or even Grover. But Thalia was older and she was...

Yeah, whatever. Percy didn't have a good reason. He tilted his head back and drummed the desk with the butt of his pencil. Annabeth said, "Percy."

He looked at her.

"Imagine how weird it must be to be her," she said very gently. "She had no friends ever except Luke and me, and now I'm way different and he's..."

She didn't finish.

"She barely knows anyone from camp. And you kind of hate her for basically no reason. I don't know. I'd feel bad if I was her. I just think..." Even through the rainbow crystallisation of the IM, he saw her wring her hands. "We have the chance to do something nice for her. And she's my friend. So I'd like to."

She looked at him pleadingly. At length, he blew out a breath. "Yeah, sure. She can come. More the merrier, right? Should I get in touch with camp?"

"I was going to do that anyway," Annabeth said. "See how my cabin is doing without me. I'll ask her at the same time."

That was a relief. Bringing Thalia along was Annabeth's idea, so Percy was glad she was taking initiative on it. And when didn't she? Taking initiative was basically all Annabeth did. That's what made her so cool. He nodded. "Sounds good. Tell her my mom and I can pick her and Grover up at the same time."

"I'll say that," Annabeth agreed.

A brief beat of silence passed, before Percy hurried to break it with, "How's Virginia?"

Annabeth looked around, as if appraising Virginia, and shrugged. "It's alright."

"Is it?" he asked. "Better than camp?"

"Don't act stupid," she sait flatly, making him laugh. She settled on her bed with her knees folded up tight and her arms and head nestled atop them. "It's... it's fine. The twins are dumb and annoying in a little kid way, but they're fine. They're kinda like my siblings at camp, so... they're the only part that makes sense to me. How's your mom?"

"She's good," Percy said. "Yeah, she's good."

"Okay," Annabeth said. "Cool."

"Yeah."

"School?"

"School's fine. Haven't blown it up yet. But I'll get my chance sooner or later, I'm sure."

She smiled. "Don't get too excited. You'll burst something."

"No, I'm thrilled. I dream about it every day," he said, drawing a soft laugh from her. A little tiny one. Her trying to keep it down made it come out all warm and low. "How's school for you?"

"It's alright," she said with a little shrug, before frowning. "Well. It's still boring. I guess this year's been a little better. But I don't get how people don't already know half the stuff we cover in history class and things."

"Not everyone remembers everything they've ever heard," Percy said.

"Yeah, yeah. But I do like being the smartest in class, though. The teachers like me."

"You said that in one of your letters," Percy said fondly and rearranged himself in his chair. His elbow knocked against his homework papers and he blinked, suddenly remembering what he'd been doing when she called. He'd have rather sat there forever talking with her than doing any of this. "Well, wise girl, maybe you can help me with this math."

"Oh, yeah?" Her eyes lit up, though he was sure she'd have been embarrassed if he pointed it out. "What is it?"

"It's—"

"Percy?" A knock and the door was squeaking open and Percy reflexively bounded forward to wave a hand through the IM. He crashed onto the floor as his mom entered the room. "Oh my god, Percy, are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Percy said into the hardwood.

"Who were you talking to?"

"Annabeth," he said reluctantly. He pushed himself back up into the chair.

"Oh, Annabeth! That's nice. Why'd you shut off the video? I would have said hi to her," his mom asked, and Percy found himself messing with his hair nervously.

"I don't know," he said. "I— I panicked, I guess. Dang it, I'm gonna have to explain to her—"

"She was alright, though, right?" she asked. "Movie night's still on?"

"Yeah, yeah. Oh, um, yeah, actually, update about that. She called to ask if..."


They lay in Zadie's boat. Percy's breath was still coming in hard and loud, even though he had been breathing fine underwater. By the sound of it, Annabeth was having an even harder time. Percy sat up and looked over at her. Her face was blank, dark eyes washed out by the gray sky. She stared into it catatonically. He'd never seen her like that.

"Annabeth?" he ventured, climbing over the bench seat to her. She made no response except to blink a few times. Maybe the emptiness in her eyes softened a little. She only looked at him once he grabbed hold of her to help her sit up, and she didn't resist the effort. Unlike him, she was soaked. The red of her jacket had been dyed a deep maroon by the saltwater. "Here, sit here."

Percy helped her rise from the wet ground up onto a bench seat. He looked around for something to help with, and with a little bit of scrambling around retrieved a blanket from the inside of the open cabin door. He brought that to her and wrapped it around her shoulders. She was still staring at nothing.

"This will keep you warm," he said quietly. Something in his tone seemed to wake her, because she finally met his eyes. He smiled. He didn't get one back, but she did nod a little and wrap the blanket tighter around herself. He hesitated. "Hey, uh. So. We got away. So, just so you know. We're safe now. From the sirens. ...Yeah."

He smiled again. It was worse than the first one, but she nodded again. The tiller was right beside her, so she grabbed that. Okay. Manning the tiller, that's a task that a person might do. She was making great progress. He stood, blew out a breath, did a little turn around. Ocean as far as the eye could see, in every direction. Well, except behind. Behind was still Circe's island, receding into the horizon.

Percy gnawed the inside of his mouth and figured maybe—

A choked breath; a sob.

Percy spun on his heels and found Annabeth with her face buried into the elbow of her jacket. She let out another sob, swallowed, like it didn't want to be heard. "Annabeth—"

"I'm not!" she said quickly and wetly. "It's just the water got in my nose, okay?"

Percy didn't reply. He watched her sit there, breath held like that would keep the feeling at bay, shoulders shaking and frame tense as a drawn bowstring. What was he supposed to say? That it was okay? That she shouldn't be ashamed? Or should he just leave? Nothing seemed right. She was just there, obviously crying, and he was just this bozo standing here like—

He dove in and hugged her. Tight. So tight that he squeezed the breath from her and she made a gross little snort into his toga.

"Sorry," he mumbled into her hair.

She cried. She cried really hard. Muffled sounds and warm wetness poured into the fabric against his chest, and he let it come. It was weird, it was like, he was glad she was getting it out, because this must have been better than her just pushing it down, but then also maybe it should have been awkward? But it wasn't awkward, Percy realised. It wasn't awkward. Not for him. He would have sat there for hours if she needed it.

Still, it didn't take that long at all—maybe a minute or two—before Annabeth was sniffling like 'snooort' and pointedly shoving Percy away. He could how purposeful and matter-of-fact it was. There was this very Annabethian 'alright, well, now that that's over with' quality to it. He leaned back to examine her puffy face as she wiped it, and she met his eyes, and right away they both turned to look away in opposite directions. It felt wrong to look at her when she was like that. Not because she was gross or anything like that, but because he knew she wouldn't have wanted him to. It was like walking in on her changing. So now it was Operation Back Up.

Percy stood and brushed off the front of his toga, which was covered in snot. That left his hand wet and sticky. He reached over to rinse it off in the water, and then felt dumb again, because doing that might have made her feel bad or stupid or repulsive or something, and he didn't want...

"I'll, um," he announced deliberately, shaking off his hand and staring at his own toes. "I'll go get changed. Be right back. Okay?"

In his peripheral vision, Annabeth nodded. He turned and clambered across the boat and into the cabin.


Before the movie, they got milkshakes from a spot a block down from the theatre. It was themed like an old-timey '50s diner, which was a little weird in the middle of Manhattan, but sure. The floors were black-and-white checkerboard tile and the booths bright pink fake leather. The flavours were named stuff like Vivacious Vanilla and Rainbow Funfetti Surprise.

"It is too vegan," Grover insisted in-between earsplittingly loud sluuuuuurps of his Magnificent Mango. "I know. I've asked. They don't mind people taking the honey, despite what that one dumb movie might have you believe."

"But it's an animal product," Annabeth said. "By definition not vegan. It's a different question if or not it's ethical to eat."

"None of us are vegan," Thalia put in. "And Grover's not even a real vegetarian. So why does it matter?"

"Because it's false advertising," Percy said in his best Annabeth impression, which was a lot too nasally and lispy. He smiled at her well-natured glare. "It's a compliment, Ance. I'm clearly the only one paying attention."

"You're rude, is what you are." Annabeth poked his arm. "But essentially, yeah. If honey's not vegan, and they use honey as a sweetener, then they shouldn't say it's vegan. And if they don't use real honey, then they shouldn't call it 'Bee-nana Split.'"

"So what should they call it?" Percy asked. "What should the name 'bee?'"

"To Bee or Not To Bee," Grover suggested lightly.

"That is the question," Annabeth immediately added. Like an activated sleeper agent, the previous topic appeared to wipe itself from her mind utterly. "Whether 'tis nobler in the mind to suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous fortune, or to—"

"What is that? What?" Percy said exasperatedly. "Shakespeare?"

"Yeah!" Annabeth exclaimed. "Hamlet! It's great."

He shook his head. He couldn't believe it—or rather, he could. "You think Jaws is boring, but you love Shakespeare?"

"Well," she amended, "I actually prefer Ovid."

Percy slammed his forehead into the table to a raucous chorus of laughter from Grover and Thalia. Thalia yelled, "No, hold on, what about the Bee-nana Split?"

"No, because here's the thing," Annabeth said, ignoring her completely. Her voice was full of that fierce passion of being convinced she was completely correct, and this was apparently far more important than honey-based false advertising. "Reading Ovid and Homer and them isn't just poetry, it's useful, practical knowledge for us. They're like bestiaries. Shakespeare is great with words, but he's not going to be helpful in a fight."

"You could argue it's another kind of education," offered Grover. "Emotional and interpersonal wisdom is really just a different kind of..."

As he talked, Thalia did a mocking face and soundlessly flapped her mouth like 'blah blah, look at me, I'm Grover and I care about emotional wisdom,' and Percy couldn't help but laugh.

"What time do we have to be at the theatre?" asked Annabeth with a glance at her watch. "It starts at 5:45, right? Should we go already? Will we have time to get tickets?"

"It's gonna be fine, it's like a five-minute walk," Percy said. "If we go now, we'll just have to wait ages when we get there."

"This is why you're chronically late," she needled.

"And this is why you're chronically early. Let me finish my milkshake, at least."

"I'm with sea boy on this," Thalia said. "The satyr agrees with us."

"What?" said Grover through a magnificent mango mouthful.

"Fine!" Annabeth announced, throwing up her hands. "But if we miss the dumb movie starting, it's on you guys!"

Percy cleared his throat. "Oh, golly—"

Grover and Annabeth both burst out into overlapping yells of the 'don't you dare even start' variety, and Percy laughed, and then the two of them laughed too, loud and infectious and belly-deep, the kind of laugh that never seems to end and bothers everyone else at the milkshake joint.

"Okay, hold on, I'm going to the bathroom before we leave," Annabeth said, clambering over Thalia to get out of the booth.

"We're not leaving yet!" Percy called out after her. "Let's put something gross in her milkshake. Don't these places usually have salt and pepper on the tables? Why's there no salt and pepper?"

"Percy!" Grover bleated.

"What? She's not going to drink the rest of it, anyway," Percy argued, not fighting back at all against Grover's grasp on his arm, stopping him from seizing Annabeth's half-drunk Yeti's Favourite Salted Caramel Frozen Yoghurt. Oh, yeah, she'd got a salt drink for some reason. Salt and frozen yoghurt. Guess there would be no point adding more salt into it. Nothing Percy could put in there would make it a worse choice at a milkshake bar, anyway. Grover pulled him back into the sofa, so he gave up.

Thalia was eyeing him. Him catching her in the act didn't seem to shake her. She just met his gaze steadily, and Percy couldn't decide if he was being approved of or if she was planning to snatch him up in her talons and eat him for lunch. (He really should have known what the latter looked like, by now.)

But then, finally, she said, "I've never seen her laugh like that."

"Okay," said Percy. He'd heard Annabeth laugh a lot. Guess Thalia didn't know her that well.

Thalia stared at him for a few more pointed moments before Grover announced, "I'm also going to the bathroom. Don't kill each other while I'm gone."

"No promises," Percy replied. When Grover was out of sight, he toasted Thalia with his milkshake, and she did the same back, and then they didn't say anything until Annabeth returned.

"Where's Grover?" was the first question.

"Bathroom," Percy said. "Wanna put something gross in his drink?"

"Hell yes," Thalia said.

"Absolutely not!" Annabeth said.


"But that doesn't make any sense," Percy objected.

"It's grammar, grammar never makes any sense," Annabeth said without looking up from her book. This was the third time she was reading that very one since they got back from the Sea of Monsters a month or so ago. Reading the same book three times in a row—so that's how she'd survived 5 years at camp with no games or TV. "Or rather, it's perfectly logical, if you ignore the exceptions."

"Doesn't sound like something you enjoy doing," he said.

"I don't!" Her announcement was paired by the book snapping shut. She rolled over onto her stomach and looked down at him, lying on the floor of the Poseidon cabin. She had naturally claimed the bed. Grover was noodling on the panpipes in the corner. "I don't like exceptions when they make no sense. When they're completely random. But actually, in this case, it makes total sense. Because sometimes exceptions are just extensions to the rules."

"Oh, god," Percy muttered.

"It's oh, gods," Annabeth corrected. "Technically, since there are several."

Technically, technically, technically. Annabeth loved technicallies. Percy only liked them when Annabeth was using them to outsmart them out of some problem. He gave her a wry smile. "You don't think any of them would do my Greek worksheet for me? They all speak it, wouldn't be hard for them."

"Then you wouldn't learn anything and there wouldn't be a point," Annabeth said in the exact cadence of every homeroom teacher Percy had ever had. He rolled his eyes.

"You could at least help me."

"I am helping you."

"Help more," Percy said. "I saved your life with the Fleece. It's the least you could do."

"You saved my life so I could do your homework for you," Annabeth said flatly. "Gee, thanks. I had started to think we were friends."

Percy chortled. From the corner of his eye, he saw Grover pause his playing and shoot a knowing at him. "Don't look at me like that, G-man."

"Like what?" Grover asked innocently and dooted a C. Or an F. Percy had no idea.

"Like you know something I don't," Percy pressed.

"We both know lots of things you don't," Annabeth said helpfully.

"I was just looking 'cause I know you know you didn't save her for the homework," Grover said. "I saw you in that cave."

Percy frowned. "Yeah, man, I was joking."

"You saved her because you care about her," Grover said in between little ditties. "Like you care about all of us."

Annabeth hummed. It sounded a little sad.

"Well, yeah, but also I saved her 'cuz I'm messed up in the head," Percy said lamentfully. "That's what Circe said, at least."

"Circe was a B-I-C-T-H," Annabeth muttered, whispering the letters like she was afraid Chiron would appear out of thin air to scold her. Percy didn't have time to process what word she'd been trying to spell before she added, "But I think she and Grover are right about something. You really do care about me. Don't you?"

"Of course I do," Percy said with an awkward chuckle.

"And you'd do that for any of your friends," Annabeth kind of said and kind of asked, still with that strange, subtle melancholy. "Me, but also Grover and Tyson. Beckendorf. Clarisse."

He made a face at her, because, well, Clarisse. She chuckled, but it didn't come up to her eyes. He said, "But no, yeah. I would. ...Yeah. I would."

She hummed triumphantly as he returned his attention to the exercise. But she was still staring at him, he could tell, and her brows were furrowed, like something was bothering her. She was probably thinking really hard about something. That was normal for Annabeth. But he watched, pretending that he was focusing on the translation exercise, and after a few moments her face loosened like she'd come to some realisation. Some realisation about him.

She smiled, but in that reluctant way she always did when she thought he'd spiced his funny with too much stupid. He looked up at her. "Okay, what?"

Annabeth shook her head like 'oh, you' and looked away. The light from the open door glinted against her eyes.

"What?" Percy insisted with a smile. "What'd I do?"

"Be you," she sighed cryptically and settled her chin back on her hands. She glanced at the worksheet. "You forgot to put the ékhō in the subjunctive mood."

"Oh," said Percy. "Gaméo tó."

"Percy!" Annabeth chided, slapping his shoulder.

"Hey, you called Circe a— !"

"Shut up!"


The movie theatre was lodged in between two boring gray office buildings, in a place that really felt like there shouldn't be a movie theatre there. But there was, and it made no effort to pretend it was anything else: The front wall was full glass, with rows of screens playing teasers for the stuff currently running, and there was a big neon logo above that Percy didn't bother to read. It was so out of place that it felt like something the Mist was supposed to hide.

The lobby was tight and small, little more than a few rows of candy stands and a tickets counter. It was mostly empty, except for a woman with a kid about eight or nine shopping for snacks and two employees in highlighter yellow shirts manning the counter, chatting amicably. A Taylor Swift song blared from the speakers.

One of the people behind the counter, a girl about seventeenish, gave Percy et al. a sideways look as they entered. Percy heard her say, "You go in the back. I'll handle it out here for a bit."

"You sure?" the other guy, also a teen, replied. "Call me over if you need me."

"Yeah, yeah. I'll be fine, thanks." She waved the guy off into the other room just as Percy and his friends came up to the counter.

The girl was goth, like full, heavy goth. She had makeup out the wazoo, eyeshadow out to here and pitch lipstick to match. Her bangs were long and black and cut straight across her brow like a freshly mowed lawn. She had two shiny silver spike piercings beneath her lower lip. She wore fishnet gloves and a charcoal gray longsleeve under the aggressively highlighter yellow theatre employee tee. She looked a lot like someone Thalia would get along with. Attached to her tee was a name tag that said Cory.

"Hi, how can I help you?" She directed the question at Thalia, probably because she was the oldest of the group. They must have looked like she was babysitting her sister and her friends. The thought made Percy's jaw clench. Cory the Movie Goth had a very croaky voice, exactly the kind of voice you'd expect a goth to have and then some. Like a broken blender. But it wasn't drawly, it was peppy. Like really happy broken blender.

"Can we get four tickets for the Atlantis Book Club at 5:45, please?" Percy butted in before Thalia could respond. It was his mom's money, he should at least be the one to spend it. Cory looked at him with a really weird look, like an 'okay, I respect your chutzpah, little man' sort of expression, which didn't actually help Percy's mood at all. She had pitch-black, intelligent eyes. They reminded him of Annabeth's.

"Sure," she said, tapping on the screen behind the counter. She had long black acrylic nails that came to such sharp points that Percy wondered how they hadn't snapped yet. The twin of her screen, the one facing out, shifted to show a top-down view of the theatre. "Pick your seats."

"You have to go row 5," Percy advised Annabeth. "Middle of row 5, if you can get it. That's the best spot. 4 or 6 if you can't help it."

"I've been to a movie theatre before, Percy," Annabeth said flatly. Cory was eyeing her, too, Percy realised. And not in a good way. She kind of looked like she wanted to tear Annabeth's throat out.

"We'll take those four," said Thalia, pointing at the screen. "In the middle on row 7."

"What?" Percy swung around, train of thought shattered. "Row 7?"

"It's basically the same," Thalia said like she was really not in the mood to argue about it. "Plus, look, the middle seats on 5 are already taken. Do you wanna sit slightly off-center and next to some stranger?"

"Four, so that's 69 and sixty cents," Cory the Movie Goth said. Annabeth elbowed Percy before he could get out a word. The word would have been 'nice,' by the way. He shot her an offended look, hand in his pocket grazing Riptide as he pulled out the spare wallet his mom had given him. Inside were four crisp 20-dollar bills and two drachmas just in case.

Things went wrong when he handed over the cash.

"Thanks," Cory said as she reached to take it. She smiled, making her long eyeshadow crinkle up into devilish lines. "Enjoy the show."

She didn't grab the cash. She grabbed Percy's wrist. And suddenly her acrylics were curved, razor-sharp talons, black and gleaming as onyx, digging into his wrist. Percy grabbed for Riptide with his free hand, but he couldn't make it there before Thalia was already shouting out and thrusting a spear past his head with a brilliant metallic shing!

Cory the Goth Theatre Monster yelled out as she stumbled behind the counter, and Percy likewise fell backwards on his ass. Grover bleated out and pulled him quickly to his feet. His wrist was bleeding. "Percy!"

With a shriek, a giant bird emerged from behind the counter where Cory had just been. It was at least the size of a hang glider, with black feathers and a silver beak. The forceful flaps of its wings forced Thalia back, letting the bird climb onto the counter and slash out wildly with its talons—not at Thalia, but at Annabeth. She barely parried the strike with her dagger.

"Suffer, Child of Athena!" Cory cawed, still with that same blender voice. Okay. Giant talking crow. Sure.

"Annabeth, watch out!" Percy shouted, knocking his sword against the crow's pointy chrome feet. Thalia let out a battle cry and engaged, forcing Cory into a battle of spear on beak and talon. Someone screamed—the mom with the kid. Percy and Annabeth looked over at them, then at Grover, who fumbled for a second before grabbing his pan flute.

"I'll handle it," he announced, already playing a tune by the time he was out of Percy's line of sight. Just as quick, his vision filled with feathers as Cory leapt over Thalia and bowled over him and Annabeth.

"I'll be glad to watch you die, backstabber's daughter," she squawked. Percy wondered if this was what it was like to be a chicken egg with an abusive mother. The thought was interrupted by a sick crack and an ear-piercing shriek as Thalia's spear sunk into Cory's neck.

"Get back, Annabeth! Percy, help her!" Thalia shouted.

"If we could—" Annabeth tried, pulling Percy from under Cory's feathery belly. She was interrupted by the flapping of huge wings, knocking her on her back.

"Annabeth!" Percy yelled and dove under the wings, pulling Annabeth out of the fray. They slid across the tiled stone floor and hit the front of the tickets counter. Thalia was busy trying to poke the crow's eye out. Their combined flailing sent candy bags flying from the snack shelves, while Grover's music struggled to keep the mortals shielded from harm. Before he could know it, Percy was stumbling to his feet with Riptide in his hand.

"Percy!" Annabeth warned.

"There's four of us and only one of her!" Percy said. "Let's just—"

Cory crowed louder than any crow had any right to, and the glass doors of the movie theatre burst. Shattered glass flew everywhere, and with it came crows, a cacophonous chorus of cooing and cawing. Thalia yelled as they crashed like a wave into her and filled the space of the lobby. Annabeth screamed. "Why would you say that?"

Percy stammered for a response, but before he could say get anything out, Annabeth grabbed him by the arm and pulled him over the counter. Percy's hip hit the marble edge, which hurt like Hades, and he fell into a heap beside a crouching Annabeth. A wave of crows hit the wall above them, squawking wildly and knocking the computer off the counter.

"Are you hurt?" Annabeth asked. She seemed unaware that she had a big red claw mark on her shoulder, and it was bleeding through her jacket.

"Do you think we could try Mariah Carey again?" Percy asked, grabbing at his hip. Annabeth didn't look like she thought that was funny.

Thalia shouted out in pain on the other side of the counter. The sound made Annabeth's eyes go wide. Just then, the Employees Only (is what Percy assumed it said) door beside them started to open. Annabeth dove into it and shoved it closed with her whole weight. From the other side, Cory's coworker said, "Hey! What the hell is happening out there?"

"We need a plan!" Annabeth said.

"Do you know what that thing is?" Percy asked. The crows above them started trying dive attacks and he whacked at them with Riptide. Annabeth scampered to be closer to him, like she was trying to shelder under the shade of the Riptumbrella.

"Corone," she breathed. "It must be Corone."

"Corone?" Hours of Ancient Greek lessons tick-tocked through Percy's head. "Like a... crow? Oh. Well, that's on the nose. Why does it want you dead specifically?"

"It's—" The explanation was interrupted by Corone's virulent screech, half of a candy shelf crashing over the countertop and almost squashing them both like bugs. Grover's pan flute playing was getting pretty frantic. Annabeth said, "You have to get her wings. Focus on her wings, okay?"

"Okay? What— Annabeth!" And then she was vaulting over the counter and out of Percy's line of sight. "Annabeth!"

The other movie theatre employee stumbled out from the break room so hard he doubled over over the counter, hit his face on the marble and groaned out in pain. He collapsed on the floor next to Percy, and they exchanged flabbergasted looks. The guy's nose was bloody and maybe broken.

"Hey, Corone! Come and get me!" Annabeth's voice shouted.

"Annabeth, what the fuck are you doing?" Thalia's said. "Hey, no, birdbrain, over here! Annabeth, stop it!"

"Stay here," Percy told the movie theatre guy and scrambled over the counter, knocking crows out of the air as he went. They dove and nipped and clawed at him, leaving bloody stripes on his arms and head. He was shielding his face as best he could.

The lobby was a mess. The floor was covered in gumballs and overturned popcorn buckets. One of the screens running trailers had fallen off the wall and was now a pile of black plastic on the ground. Percy watched Annabeth race towards the upward stairs, Corone a giant shrieking black shape right on her tail. The regular-sized crows kept a little distance so they didn't collide with the mama—that must have been intentional on Annabeth's part. She leapt up the stairs two at a time. The stairwell was narrow enough that Corone couldn't quite extend her wings all the way.

"She said to get the wings!" Percy told Thalia as she rushed past, chasing Annabeth and Corone. She looked rough. Her jeans had a new rip down the thigh that was bleeding pretty badly and her curls were a total mess.

"What?"

Annabeth swung around on the stairs and did something very strange: as Corone bit for her, she put her foot on the top of the giant beak and jumped. It looked like she was going to jump over Corone, which would have landed her right in the oncoming avalanche of bird, but instead she scrambled and slipped on Corone's back feathers, spun around and threw her arms around Corone's neck. Corone let out an ear-piercing sound and flapped backwards. Crows pecked at Annabeth's back, but she hid her face in Corone to guard it.

Corone floundered, stumbling out of the stairwell while Annabeth hold on for dear life like the world's weirdest rodeo. As soon as Corone had wheeled out of the stairwell, she did a barrel roll and slammed into the lobby floor, crushing Annabeth under her. Annabeth yelled.

"Annabeth!" Over the squawking of the crows, Percy knew at least one other voice had said it at the same time as him.

"The wings! At the base!" Annabeth screamed. She had Corone in a chokehold. Crows tried to come in to claw her hands off, but Corone's huge wings and legs flailed wildly, keeping the raging birdnado above them.

Percy dove in and buried Riptide at the base of Corone's left wing. The floor cracked under the force. Countless little talons grabbed at his hair and clothes. Thalia was less than a second behind him on the right side, spear driven into the ground. Corone let out a final horrific squawk and began to disintegrate. The crows around them dispersed too.

Annabeth coughed monster dust. She looked really bad. Percy and Thalia were on their knees on either side of her before Percy had even registered the monster was dead. Grover was there too. He looked mostly free of crow scars. Thalia dug through her bag and pulled out a plastic water bottle full of nectar.

"Drink," she commanded and poured some into Annabeth's mouth before Annabeth could bat her away.

"You need it more than me," she insisted, though her voice went from barely audible to normal word by word, like the nectae was kicking in. Thalia took a swig and then offered it to Percy. She helped Annabeth up as he sipped it. Altogether, the three of them had gone through about half of the bottle.

"You have to believe me!" said a voice from near the destroyed candy stands. It was the kid, tugging at her mother's sleeve as the mom went for the destroyed glass doors, apparently intent on leaving rather than calling the cops or something. The mom was muttering no, no, no. "Mommy, she turned into a big bird! Please believe me!"

Percy looked at Grover. So did Annabeth and Thalia. Severely, Grover said, "I'll look into that."

He rushed off after the mom and the kid. Behind the counter, the other employee groaned as he stood, rubbing his head. But the fight was over. Percy looked down at the pile of ash that used to be Cory the Movie Theatre Goth.

"She could have at least given us our change," he joked hollowly.

Thalia grabbed Annabeth's forearm and tugged her towards the exit. "We have to get out of here."

"Wait, what about the movie?" Percy asked.

"Who gives a shit about the movie?" Thalia snapped. "When the cops get here, you want to explain to them what happened?"

Percy stammered for a response, but couldn't find one. He looked to Grover first for support, and then to Annabeth. They both averted their gazes as if embarrassed that Thalia was right. Annabeth's shattered face hurt a lot more to see. Percy shook his head. "Alright, fine."

As they went for the door and made their great escape (which amounted to rushing down the street and down a side alley), Annabeth said, "That other employee will be able to give descriptions of us."

"We saved his hide," Percy said. "What does he have to snitch on us for?"

"We don't know what the Mist showed him," Thalia said. "He might've thought we attacked Corone first, or that it was all somehow our fault. We don't know. That much damage... It's hard to tell what's going to come of it."

"Guys!" Grover panted as he trotted up to them.

"The kid?" Thalia asked immediately.

"Not a demigod," Grover said, shaking his head. "Didn't smell like one, anyway. She's probably just clear-sighted. But I asked some really nice rats and they said she lives nearby and that they'll look out for her. They'll let me know if anything comes up."

"Rats?" Annabeth asked, eyebrows high. "The rats will look out for her?"

"NYC's blessing of the wild," Percy said.

"We're way too close to the cinema still," Thalia butted in. "We need to go. Let's go back to camp."

"Wait, hold on," Percy said. "Could we at least, like, stop by my place? Y'know, eat something, I don't know... watch something off Netflix instead?"

"Is she going to be mad that we lost the money?" Annabeth asked. "You never got it back from Corone. 80 bucks is a lot."

Percy pursed his lips, but then decided, "No, I don't think she'll be that mad. I mean, maybe, but... I think she'll just be glad we're alright."

"You have some mom," Thalia commented as doubtfully as if Percy had just said he'd been raised by a humanoid swarm of bees.

"I sure do," said Percy.

"I think that's a good idea," Grover said. "Sally's really nice."

"Let's go, then," Annabeth said. They'd got maybe half a block down before Percy spoke.

"Alright, so, can someone tell me who this Corone was? Why do we keep meeting monsters that have beef with your mom?" He bapped Annabeth's arm gently. She didn't quite smile, but at least she seemed to try to.

"Corone used to be my mom's best friend."

"What?"

"Before she met her owl, Nyctimene, Athena's closest companion was a crow, Corone," Annabeth explained softly. "Then I guess they drifted apart. The little owl became Athena's new sacred animal and Corone got embittered by it."

Percy wasn't sure what the owl's size had to do with it, but he nodded. Ancient Greek girl drama. "Okay."

"And see, this is why you should read Ovid. He wrote about Corone in Metamorphoses."

"Oh, yeah. Leave it to Annabeth to make being a demigod about homework," Percy snarked. Thalia and Annabeth both whirled around, but Annabeth's punch on his arm landed first. Thank the gods, because that slightly quelled whatever surely far worse punishment was visibly brewing behind Thalia's eyes. Instead, it was Annabeth who said:

"You call it homework, I call it survival! You being all like 'oh, I know Greek myths, my mom read me the graphic novel,' but then when I study up, I'm being an egghead? The obscure stories matter too, for people like us. As evidenced by the fact that one of them just tried to kill us and almost succeeded!"

"...Sorry," Percy said, rubbing his arm. Annabeth looked pleased enough with the apology, and when Percy shot Thalia a grudging look like 'happy?', her smug responding expression replied, 'yeah, pretty much.' A successful sacrifice of his dignity at the altar of Lady Thalia, goddess of girls showing guys who's boss.

Grover gave him a pat on the back as they headed up the street.


At Percy's place, they talked over several episodes of Friends. Thalia had already seen them, so she wouldn't shut up, Annabeth made contemptuous faces at the jokes instead of laughing and Grover was too focused on eating to be much of a conversationalist. Percy's mom made them blue mac'n'cheese for dinner and then they gorged on the movie snacks they'd been intending to sneak into the theater in their backpacks.

It was weird, but everyone stayed the night. Grover, Thalia, Annabeth. Thalia took the couch—she said something about being used to those that made Percy's mom frown—and Annabeth and Grover got spare mattresses, Grover's on the floor of Percy's room and Annabeth's by the couch. The tiny apartment wasn't exactly made to host a group sleepover.

Percy's dreams were weird, but the normal kind of weird instead of the scary kind. He woke up at 2 AM once. Grover was out cold. Percy went back to sleep.

In the morning, they ate breakfast before Percy's mom went to drive Thalia and Grover back to camp. Annabeth had tickets to a Greyhound to take her back home, but that wasn't until the afternoon, so for now they were just sitting on the couch playing cards. It was just as if they were back at camp. Except they were in his living room.

"Sorry the movie was a bust," Percy said. His voice squeaked a little bit.

"It's okay." Annabeth shrugged, her attention on the cards in her hands. "It was a good learning experience. I think it's valuable to know how mortal kids do things."

"Oh, that's good. Thanks for the rave reviews," Percy joked hollowly, warm at the tips of his ears.

"Well, I also had fun," she said.

"Really?" That made her look up at him with arched brows. Percy stammered. "You— you had fun?"

She didn't roll her eyes, but she looked away a second as though she was rolling them mentally. "Yes, seaweed brain."

"Even though we didn't actually see a movie and instead almost got killed by a big crow?" He laughed nervously. "I personally didn't think that was so fun."

"Yeah, not that part," Annabeth said quietly. "But the rest of it. So I guess you were right."

She had this faint smile on her face, like the one on the last day at camp, one that was all eyes.

"It's more fun when you're with friends."

Percy felt his face split in a grin too, doubtless a billion times doofier than hers. "Yeah. I'm— I'm glad."

Annabeth hummed her Annabeth hum, the high and clipped one that sounds like 'isn't it interesting how I already knew that.' She rifled through her cards for a long moment before she said, "Y'know, I'd be down for a do-over."

"What?" Percy asked in a normal way, because he genuinely had no idea what she'd just said, and once he figured it out it felt better to pretend he hadn't.

"To go to the movies again," Annabeth said, also in a normal way. She quickly glanced up at him from beneath her brows. "I probably can't convince my dad to let me come back for a while, and your mom might not want to buy tickets for us, but... I don't know. Sometime?"

"Really?" Percy asked, but pivoted quickly to, "Yeah! That would be so cool. Just name the time and place."

"Yeah." Her face was bright. "Yeah, I will."