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When Mel walked in for her shift that day, she already felt off. Her scrubs were irritating her skin, making her want to claw them off.
She was been in a rush this morning and had woken up late. She needed to drop Becca off at the centre by the time she left the house. The meltdown was taking root under her skin.
Soon it would simmer itself up to the surface, and Mel was not planning on anyone seeing that part.
She would keep it under control until the end of her shift.
Which was in twelve hours…
The hospital was busy today, packed with doctors running around to patient to patient, trauma to trauma. Mel walked over to the board to see what patients she would be having today.
A 50 year old male with abdominal pain.
She pulled the curtain opened to show the man. He had short black hair and was in a formal suit. He looked like he came straight from a party or important meeting.
“Hello mr-“ she looked at his chart “-wilson i’m doctor Melissa King you said you were having some abdominal pain?” Mel said moving to the side of the bed to get speak to him.
The man gave her an unsure look. “Yeah,” he said.
“Could you explain more to me how that feels?” The noise of the hospital was becoming unbearable she had only just arrived though she had to push through. Mel wrung her hands together, a stimming habit she did to soothe herself in this busy environment.
“Ugh, I don’t know. It just hurts, I guess.” He shrugged. “How long will this take? I have to get back to work.”
“It won’t take long, I promise,” Mel smiled.
“You look young,” the man eyed her up and down. “Could I not get a serious doctor, not some girl?”
Mel averted her eyes and took a deep breath. “We’re pretty packed today, sir. I apologise.”
Mel was used to patients like this misogynistic men who looked down on women in healthcare.
Mel pulled the man’s shirt to his chest. “I’m just going to feel around our abdominal area. Is that okay?” Mel noticed he kept glancing at her hands. She knew her stimming got her unwanted attention, but Robby told her if it helped her regulate, it’s important and what others think isn’t.
The man mumbled a “yes” in reply, obviously not very happy with his doctor.
Mel felt around his abdomen for any tenderness.
Just as she was about to finish up her exam, she put pressure on a tender spot. The man jerked and flung his arm out before Mel could register what happened.
His arm was muscular and strong. It hit Mel, sending her flying into the wall.
Her head banged off the wall. She collapsed on the floor, dazed.
“What’s wrong with you!” he screamed. “Are you fucking ret-“
Mel’s ears were ringing.
Her head spun.
She let out an involuntary whimper and curled in on herself. Tears rolled down her cheeks.
Everything felt too much.
The man was still shouting at her.
It was like a switch was flipped She felt scared and small. She couldn’t move. Terrified it would provoke him more, all she could do was curl up and cry like a child.
Mel couldn’t hold back the meltdown anymore. She let out a sob, her hands coming up to cover her ears.
The curtain was flung open. Then Frank Langdon standing behind them, along with Santos and Robby.
The commotion had obviously caught their attention, sending them running to her.
Langdon and Robby restrained the man, and Santos came to crouch in front of Mel, checking her for injuries.
“We need security in here!!” Langdon yelled.
“Mel, do you have any injuries?” Santos asked.
She didn’t know.
All she could think about was the fabric of her scrubs, the fluorescent lights that made her head hurt, and the torturous beeping of machines.
Santos put a hand on her cheek, forcing eye contact.
Mel let out a sob and shriek. At that Trinity’s touch felt like sandpaper to her skin. She jerked away like she had been burned.
Everything felt all-consuming.
All she wanted was to go home.
She saw Ahmad push his way in and leave with mr wilson restrained.
She felt she could breathe a little easier. She didn’t completely feel safe, but the air felt less suffocating.
Robby came to stand beside her as Langdon crouched down beside Santos. Langdon’s presence made her want to curl into his chest and block out the world.
She couldn’t.
Because he was just her co worker
And he would never like her like that. She had gotten ahead of herself when he got a divorce, thinking she finally had a shot.
But she never would.
He would never want the autistic girl who curled up on the floor crying instead of defending herself.
“Mel, can you look at me?” Langdon said.
She rocked back and forth, sobbing. She shook her head ‘no’.
Suddenly, all the voices started lapping together.
“He must’ve just hit her into the wall.”
“She could have hit her head.”
“She’s in distress.”
“Robby—we should get her out of here.”
Everything hurt—
it was too many voices, too much noise, too many feelings.
Mel screamed.
Her hands started clawing at her ears.
Her rocking became more violent.
“Hey—hey—Mel, it’s okay, it’s okay.”
Langdon’s soft, calming voice was like a warm blanket leading her out of her overwhelming head.
“Hurts!” she forced out. Her tears came faster.
“It hurts?” Santos asked, her brows furrowing.
“Your ears hurt?” Langdon asked.
Mel nodded. The sounds were all morphing together, making her ears ache that, on top of her head and embarrassment, she was not having a good start to the shift.
“Why do her ears hurt?” Santos turned to Langdon, her eyebrows furrowed.
Langdon sighed. “Her ears ache whenever she’s overstimulated,” he explained.
Langdon had walked in on her sobbing in the break room over the pain one day and held her until she calmed down.
“We should move her to a quiet room.”
Mel felt herself being lifted up and carried to a quiet room.
Her eyes were closed the whole time, but when she opened them, Langdon’s deep blue eyes were staring back at her.
Frank Langdon was carrying her….
Princess style….
In the middle of the ed…
If she wasn’t in the middle of a meltdown, she would be kicking her feet and giggling.
It was exactly like something from the cringe romance books she loves.
When they made it to the room, the door clicked behind them, and she was laid down on the uncomfortable hospital bed.
She had calmed down a lot more since being brought into the room. She took deep breaths with her eyes closed, trying to calm the last of her breathing.
When her eyes blinked open, she winced at the strong, blinding lights. langdon and santos stood beside the bed robby was absent probaly dealing with mr wilson outside.
“Santos, could you dim the lights?” Langdon asked, taking a seat next to the bed, watching over Mel.
Santos and Langdon shared a look across the room before Santos quietly slipped out.
“Mel, could you tell me what the man did to you?” he asked softly. He had his ‘Mel voice on’, as Princess called it. It always made Mel feel floaty, like she could just cuddle up into him and never have adult responsibilities again.
Mel picked at a scab on her hand before starting. “It wasn’t anything bad. He was angry from the moment I went in, probably from the wait. I thought I could handle it, but when I started the exam, I accidentally pushed down on a tender bit. His arm flew out and hit me. Then he called me a-“ Mel took a shuddering breath. “I don’t want to repeat it.”
Mel didn’t have to say it. Langdon knew.
Mel had her fair share of ableist comments, but that word… she could never get used to hearing it.
“Okay, Mel, you did good. I’m proud of you.” Langdon leaned forward to tuck a piece of loose hair from her braid behind her ear. Mel’s heart skipped a beat.
she could never get used to Langdon’s sweet gestures. She knew he was probably like that with all his friends, though.
“I’m really fine Dr Langdon” she used her best puppy eyes. She really couldn’t handle the stress of doctors fussing over her right now.
“No way, Mel, you’re getting checked out, okay, for my sake?” Their hands bumped at the edge of the bed, electricity racing through the touch, but Langdon pulled away just as fast.
Mel let out a dramatic sigh. “Fine.” She pouted.
“That’s my girl.”
His girl?
She could feel her face heating up and instinctively dropped her gaze to her fidgeting hands.
langdon moved to the other side of the bed getting comfortable on the chair.
“Are you having a headache?” Langdon moved on like he hadn’t just almost made her drop dead from his one-liner.
“Hmm, not right now, but I did beforehand.” She chewed the inside of her cheek.
“Okay, what about nausea, dizziness?”
“I don’t think so.” It was hard for her to identify her feelings like others did; autistic people couldn’t regulate like allistics; it was always a problem for her.
When she would be screaming and pulling at her hair, from an unknown feeling in her chest, her mum begging to tell her what was wrong, all she could say was “I don’t know.”
“Alright, what’s your name?”
“Melissa King.”
“No middle name?” Langdon teased.
Mel chuckled. “No.”
“Do you know where you are?”
“The Pitt,” Mel answered.
“Great, now follow my finger.” His finger moved from one end of her face to the other as she followed along.
“Awesome, you probably just took a hit, nothing too serious. The overstimulation probably made it feel worse than it was.” He smiled.
“Sorry,” Mel frowned, she always overreacted, she never understood why she couldn’t function like normal people did.
Before her first day of the Pitt, she sat outside sobbing, coaxing herself to take a step inside, she watched Santos, Whitaker and Javadi all enter, wishing she could be like them, take life in stride, stop overthinking.
Just be normal!
The thing she had wished for every birthday since she was ten.
“Hey! No apologising, okay? You handled it perfectly.” His fingers twitched as if wanting to reach out.
“You don’t think I overreacted? I know I tend to be dramatic and make things worse than they are in my head!” She rambled.
Langdon interrupted her by jumping into the hospital bed; it was a tight fit, but he made it work.
He put an arm over Mel’s shoulder, pulled her in, “Don’t speak about yourself like that, okay?” he whispered in her ear.
All Mel could do was let out a “hm!” in reply, her voice betraying her.
“Just get comfortable, okay the ed can survive without us for a while,” her armour from the day crumpled. Mel was already feeling sleepy, this was exactly what she needed. a safe place in his arms where she didn’t feel judged, too much or felt she needed to perform. This was her safe haven where she could just exist peacefully.
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