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A lot had happened in the past few months. A succession of completely absurd events that Eddie was convinced would require at least two years of therapy just to come to terms with and learn how to live with.
To begin with: Eddie had been stabbed inside a chapel, after which he found himself trapped in an elevator while he was slowly bleeding to death. And, lying on the floor of that elevator, staring at a white light that seemed to be coming towards him, he had his realization.
His Awakening.
Well, actually, his gay awakening.
To be completely honest, though, he’d already had his gay awakening. More or less eight years earlier, when he first set foot in the 118 firehouse and found himself face-to-face with a certain someone whose eyes were as blue as the sea, whose birthmark was super adorable, and whose lips looked like flower buds.
Too bad it had only taken him this long to start making sense of it all.
Better late than never, as they say.
Anyway, yes, Eddie was in love with his best friend. Great. Fantastic. Now he just had to find a way to come out and tell him.
Simple, quick, effective.
Certainly not something that could completely change his life.
No pressure.
——
Months later, the entire team was at the firehouse, on a q-word shift.
Chimney had been singing Jennifer Love Hewitt’s praises for at least five minutes.
“Maddie said she approves of this actress as my free pass. And I’m thrilled to have such an understanding wife.”
“I highly doubt Maddie actually used those words,” Hen commented without even looking up from the TV while playing Mario Kart against Ravi.
Eddie, sitting in the armchair, barely managed to suppress a smile.
That actress looked exactly like Maddie.
But he wisely decided to keep that thought to himself.
“Karen gave me Scarlett Johansson,” Hen added, just as her Yoshi crossed the finish line in first place.
Ravi dropped his Joy-Con onto the coffee table, letting out an exasperated groan.
“This game was rigged,” he muttered, his eyebrows furrowed.
“Sure, Ravi.”
“Anyway,” he continued, “May and I never talked about it, but I’m pretty sure hers would be that Bridgerton actor she’s obsessed with.”
Regé-Jean Page.
Eddie nodded almost imperceptibly.
Excellent choice.
Not that Eddie was a huge fan of that Netflix show, but he knew how to recognize when a man was objectively attractive.
And how he immediately knew which actor Ravi was talking about was absolutely none of anyone’s business.
That observation, too, remained strictly locked inside his head.
“And what would yours be, Ravi?” Buck asked.
He was sitting on the arm of the couch with an open book in his hands. Something about Pompeii, probably. It had been his favorite subject of the week.
Ravi took a few seconds to think about it.
“Anne Hathaway,” he said, and Buck looked up from his book.
“Specifically in The Princess Diaries.”
“The ‘specifically in’ doesn’t work with Anne Hathaway,” Buck immediately countered. “She’s a goddess in every movie she’s in.”
A chorus of approving murmurs rose from the rest of the team.
Eddie, despite being one hundred percent sure he was gay, couldn’t help but agree.
Anne Hathaway was one of those rare people capable of bringing all the peoples of the world together.
“Okay, I accept defeat,” Ravi replied, pointing his Joy-Con at Buck with a faint smile “What about you, Buckley? Who’s your free pass?”
Buck raised an eyebrow, closing his book and placing it on the coffee table.
“Man or woman?”
Ravi stared at him, bewildered.
“Ah-ah. Sorry, Buckley, but you can’t play the bisexuality card. You only get one free pass. You’d better choose wisely.”
Chimney and Hen exchanged an amused look.
Eddie, on the other hand, felt inexplicably nervous. He didn’t know why. After all, despite being hopelessly in love with his best friend, this was just a stupid question about a celebrity crush. A meaningless conversation between friends.
And yet, he desperately needed to hear the answer.
Even though, at the same time, he would have rather thrown himself off a bridge (again) than hear it.
Buck lowered his gaze, deep in thought. He genuinely seemed to be pondering the answer, as if he were facing the most important decision of his life.
Five seconds passed. Then another ten.
But finally, his eyes lit up.
“I’ve got it!” he exclaimed happily, capturing everyone’s attention.
Eddie felt his heart rise into his throat, absentmindedly rubbing his hands along the sides of his pants, inexplicably sweaty.
“You know Step Up?” Buck asked.
Hen furrowed her brow.
“Step Up? That series of movies about dancers?”
Chimney snapped his fingers.
“Oh, yeah. Maddie is obsessed with it.”
“What about Step Up?” Eddie intervened for the first time, trying to sound as indifferent as possible.
Buck shrugged, suddenly nervous.
“The fourth movie. Step Up Revolution. The main character.”
Hen’s eyes widened, completely speechless. And slowly, she turned towards Eddie.
Eddie looked at her.
Why is she staring at me?
“What?” he asked.
Hen didn’t answer, still completely catatonic.
Eddie frowned, then pulled out his phone, deciding to type “Step Up Revolution main actor” into the Google search bar.
The browser took a few seconds to load, while his heart seemed determined to explode inside his chest.
Then the picture appeared.
Eddie froze, finally understanding Hen’s reaction.
Oh.
Wait.
That was—
No. I mean, it wasn’t him.
Obviously, it wasn’t him.
But it was… him.
It was Eddie.
Not Eddie-Eddie, obviously. But definitely Eddie. A version of himself ten years younger.
Some sort of long-lost twin.
A version of Eddie Diaz someone had shipped off to Hollywood to play a sexy dancer.
Eddie stared at the screen, completely unable to process what he was seeing.
And finally, without saying a word, he turned the phone towards the rest of the team.
Immediately, silence fell over the room.
For a few seconds, nobody moved, as if they had all silently agreed, without any prompt, to do the mannequin challenge.
Harry was the one who finally broke the silence.
“Buck.”
Buck looked at him.
Harry pointed at the screen with a slow movement, as if he were trying not to scare away a frightened puppy.
“Do you realize that actor looks practically identical to Eddie, right?”
Buck’s eyes widened, a hint of panic flashing across his blue irises.
“What?!”
“He’s… Eddie,” Harry cautiously tried again.
“No.”
“Buck—”
“It’s not true.”
Hen burst out laughing, unable to hold back anymore.
“Buck, he’s literally Eddie ten years younger with a dancer’s abs.”
Despite his shock, Eddie couldn’t help but mentally point out, rather petulantly, that he was also a dancer.
Thanks a lot.
“No!” Buck exclaimed again.
Chimney leaned forward to get a better look at the phone.
“Oh my God,” he whispered.
Buck straightened his posture.
“He doesn’t look anything like him!” he tried again, this time less convincingly.
Eddie looked at the screen first, then at Buck.
“Buck,” he said cautiously.
“What?!” Buck immediately snapped.
“That’s basically me,” Eddie said. “You chose me.”
He finally gave in to a smile.
“I did not choose you!” Buck yelled desperately this time.
The room erupted into general laughter. Hen had to lean against the table to keep from falling over, while Chimney was laughing so hard he was literally crying.
Ravi pointed back and forth between Buck and Eddie.
“So… Eddie is your free pass?”
Buck didn’t know what to say anymore, completely resigned to his fate.
“Eddie, put the phone next to your face and turn towards Buck.”
The instructions came from Hen, who was still in the throes of hysterical laughter.
Eddie obeyed, letting him and Buck exchange looks. Eddie’s was curious; Buck’s was resigned.
“Eddie… I—” Buck didn’t get the chance to finish, because Eddie grabbed him by the wrist and dragged him out of the firehouse, away from their nosy coworkers.
He could still hear Chimney’s voice as they walked away.
“Fifteen dollars they’re kissing now.”
Eddie rolled his eyes, trying to ignore him and focus on his mission.
He stopped once he was sure they couldn’t hear them from there and let go of Buck’s wrist, positioning himself in front of his best friend.
“Buck, talk to me,” he said in a monotone voice, despite feeling completely ecstatic inside.
Buck shrugged.
“Eddie, I don’t know what you want me to say.”
“The truth, for starters, would be ideal.”
“Eddie…” Buck whined.
“Do you find me— attractive?” Eddie cringed at his own words.
“Even if I did, it wouldn’t matter, because you’re straight,” Buck pointed out.
Eddie raised an eyebrow.
“No, Buck.”
He smiled to himself.
“What—? What do you mean, no?” It was as if Buck’s entire system had gone into forced shutdown.
Eddie let out a little laugh.
“I’m gay, Buck.”
Buck didn’t answer. He remained completely still while the gears in his brain seemed to be turning so quickly that Eddie could almost hear a mechanical sound coming from his head.
For a few moments, they simply stood there, contemplating each other.
“I’m in love with you.”
Buck admitted this truth into the silence, while around them the world seemed to have shifted off its axis.
Eddie didn’t answer. He simply decided to act.
He took one step after another and cupped Buck’s cheeks in his hands.
He closed his eyes and, without hesitation, brought their lips together with force.
Buck initially remained motionless, his eyes wide open, but that reaction didn’t last long. Soon enough, he melted into the kiss.
Eddie hummed contentedly at the difference, while Buck grabbed him by the hips, pulling Eddie’s pelvis against his.
Now they were pressed against each other, just as they should have been from the beginning.
Eddie didn’t believe in fate, but in that moment, he felt as though their bodies had been made to fit together. Like a magnetic force pulling them into each other’s arms.
Slowly, the kiss came to an end, though neither of them was willing to let go of the other.
Buck rested his forehead against Eddie’s, and Eddie smiled, feeling his cheeks grow hot.
“I love you too,” Eddie whispered.
Buck let out a breathy smile.
They kissed again, this time more consciously. No rush, just the slow intention of getting to know each other more deeply.
When they separated, Buck let out a breathy laugh.
“Hi,” he whispered.
Eddie smiled at him, gently brushing his thumbs over his cheekbones.
“Hi,” he replied.
“So…” Buck murmured, letting the sentence trail off.
“So?”
“Are you really gay?”
“Yes.”
“And are you really in love with me?”
Eddie raised an eyebrow, slightly amused.
“No. You know what? I’ve changed my mind. I’m going to confess my incredible homosexual feelings to Ravi.”
Eddie pretended to walk away, but he didn’t make it very far before Buck stopped him, throwing himself at him like a little octopus.
“No! You already said it, you can’t take it back,” he said, with the petulant tone of a child.
Eddie chuckled, pulling himself slightly free from Buck’s hold so he could cover his face in kisses. First his forehead, then his nose, his cheeks, and finally his birthmark.
“I love you, Buck.”
Buck couldn’t hold back little sighs of happiness.
“I love you too.”
But their sweet moment didn’t last long, because they heard loud laughter coming from inside the firehouse.
“We’re going to become their favorite target now, aren’t we?” Buck sighed.
“Definitely.”
Eddie took his boyfriend’s hand, ready to go back inside and face the teasing from their family.
“Ready?”
“Eddie, wait a second.”
Eddie looked at him, confused.
“Who’s your free pass?” Buck murmured.
“Seriously?”
Buck put on an adorable little pout.
“Completely serious.”
Eddie sighed, but his answer came without hesitation.
“You know that ABC show about firefighters?”