Chapter Text
NEW CONTACT ADDED:
XXXXXXXXXXXX
CONTACT RENAMED TO:
‘Simon🤟’
NEW DIRECT MESSAGING CHAT STARTED WITH: ‘Simon🤟’
Chase:
Got a new phone so I have to re add everyone
Just checking, this you simon,
??*
Simon🤟:
Nope. Think again.
Chase:
???
Simon🤟:
Wrong number.
Chase:
Ohhhhh sorry
————————————————————-
Chase:
Dude
Can you teach me how to backflip??
Please
Simon please
Please
Please
Please
Simon🤟:
Wrong number. Again.
Chase:
Oh wait yeah
Sorry
Can YOU teach me?
Simon🤟:
I wouldn’t even if I could.
Chase:
Rude
Simon🤟:
Deserved.
—————————————————————
Chase:
Sorry, gonna have to cancel on praticr again
I know I know
It’s just
Something came up okay?
Please don’t be mad ☹️
Simon🤟:
I’m not the person you should be worried about.
Wrong number.
Again.
Chase:
That’s the third time now jeez
Really sorry
It’s just cuz I didn’t change your contact info
What’s ur name?
Simon🤟:
Lose my number.
Chase:
Okay buddy
CONTACT INFORMATION CHANGED TO: ‘Buddy🙄’
Chase:
❤️❤️❤️❤️
—————————————————————
Chase:
Hey
How are you?
Oh cool
Im just chilling rn
But im bored
You sleep okay?
Yeah me neither
Too hot
…
Great talk
Buddy🙄:
Do you ever shut up?
Chase:
Oh you’re here!!
Thought youd never respond
Buddy🙄:
So did I.
What part of ‘lose my number’ do you not understand?
Chase:
From lose to my and number
Buddy🙄:
Why do you keep messaging me?
Chase:
Full of questions today huh
Buddy🙄:
Just answer it.
Chase:
Okay fine
Im curious
I wanna get to know you
Buddy🙄:
Curiosity killed the cat.
Chase:
Would it kill *you* to not be a grouch?
Buddy🙄:
I fear this conversation will.
I already told you, stop messaging me.
I have no interest in encouraging you with your meaningless chitchat.
Chase:
Why not
Its harmless
Buddy🙄:
It's wasting my time.
Chase:
Or do you prefer not to have any friends?
Buddy🙄:
I have friends.
Chase:
Just straight up lying
Buddy🙄:
I’d rather have none than befriend you.
Chase:
Fine then
If u really hate me then block me
Buddy🙄:
Just delete me as a contact.
Chase:
No you do it
Buddy🙄:
I asked first.
Chase:
But i dont want to so you do it
Buddy🙄:
You are so childish.
Chase:
Says the one who wont do it even tho it was his idea
Buddy🙄:
I’m not wasting my time on this when you are just as capable of doing it yourself.
Chase:
Oh but you will to text me?
All this about wasting time but you couldve deleted me quicker
Buddy🙄:
Go away.
Chase:
No
Buddy🙄:
Fine.
Chase:
Wait what
Srsly??
Buddy????
??????????????????????????
Buddy🙄:
Don't make me change my mind.
Chase:
HYAY
—————————————————————
Chase:
Buddy how do I take the thorns off of a rose??
My fingers can only hold so many bandages at a time
Buddy🙄:
Why do you think I would know?
Chase:
Because you’re obviously such a romantic, must be handling them every day with how many chicks you get
Buddy🙄:
Well, I don’t.
Chase:
Seriously not? I thought girls dig the mean guy persona
Buddy🙄:
I meant the flowers.
And why exactly do you need to know so badly anyway?
Chase:
I’m trying to cut the thorns off these roses
Buddy🙄:
Yes, I figured.
I mean to say that I’m asking why you have roses in the first place.
Chase:
I’ve been working some extra summer jobs to save up
Now I’m working as a florist
I’m trying to make a bouquet of roses rn and it’s HARD
Buddy🙄:
I see.
I’m shocked they actually accepted your resume, considering you don’t even know how to do something as basic as that.
Chase:
Yup!
Buddy🙄:
Correct me if I’m wrong, but I thought texting on the job wasn’t allowed?
Or are you the ‘breaking the rules’ type of guy?
Chase:
This is important okay
Buddy🙄:
Well, I hope you figure it out.
Chase:
I’m gonna get in so much trouble 😓😓
Buddy🙄:
I might have read a book on this before.
Give me a moment to find it.
.
.
.
Buddy🙄:
You have to use a tool called a ‘Thorn Stripper’. Clamp it at the top of the stem, right under the bloom, and carefully pull the stripper down to the bottom. However, be sure not to apply too much pressure as this can damage the stem.
Chase:
It’s fine now dw
I just searched it up
There’s a tutorial for everything nowadays
Buddy🙄:
So I looked for nothing? Great.
Chase:
Thanks anyways for trying😙
—————————————————————
Chase:
Buddy
Buddy
Buddy
Hey Buddy
Budddyyyyy
Buddy answer me
Buddddyyyyy Buddy Buddy buddy
Buddy🙄:
Don’t message me right now. I’m at work.
Chase:
Ur working right now???
Didn’t know the circus was still hiring
Too busy jumping through rings of fire to talk to me?
Buddy🙄:
Leave me alone.
Chase:
No wait let me guess
You’re a swinging trapeze!
Buddy🙄:
Leave. Me. Alone.
Chase:
No no wait!!!
You’re the ringmaster!
Did I get it right???
Buddy🙄:
Stop. Messaging. Me.
Chase:
You should know this by now
It’s not gonna happen
Not until you tell me what you’re doing
Buddy🙄:
If I tell you, do you promise to stop blowing up my phone?
Chase:
Hmmmmm maybe
Depends
What are you doing?
Buddy🙄:
Fine.
I’m reorganising the nonfiction books into alphabetical order.
Chase:
Well what are you doing that for??
Buddy🙄:
I’m a librarian.
Happy?
Chase:
A librarian? Seriously?
You’re joking right?
Buddy🙄:
If you’re only here to insult my profession then you should know that I am now silencing my phone.
Chase:
No buddy come back I’m sorrryyyy
I swear I’m sorry
I didn’t mean to be rude
Buddy ☹️
Buddy🙄:
It’s fine.
—————————————————————
DIRECTLY MESSAGING: ‘Dorkin🐴’
Chase:
I think I upset Buddy
Dorkin🐴:
Who’s Buddy???
Chase:
I never meant to I was just surprised
But I guess it makes sense considering how much he tells me to shut up
I could see him doing that
Dorkin🐴:
Chase who is buddy??????
Chase:
What should I do now?
He said it was fine but it’s totally not fine
Dorkin🐴:
CHASE
WHO
IS
BUDDY?????
Chase:
Oh right
When I was readding people I accidently messaged the wrong number
I thought Simon was this guy Buddy but he actually wasn’t
We’ve been taking for a few days
His names not actually Buddy, I have no clue what his name is but I just call him that
But that’s doesn’t matter
Dorkin🐴:
I think it does
Chase:
I’ve upset him and I need to fix it before he hates me and never speaks to me again!!!
Dorkin🐴:
Okay well
What did you say?
Chase:
He said he was a librarian
And I said ‘a librarian? Seriously? You’re joking right?’
And then he got upset
Dorkin🐴:
Duh
Of course he did
Chase:
How do I fix it then??!?!?
Dorkin🐴:
Jeez chase
Calm down
Look
Tell him the truth
You didn’t mean it in a rude way, you were just surprised. I mean in all fairness you don’t hear many people our age with jobs like that
Chase:
Oh idk how old he is
Dorkin🐴:
You WHAT
Chase:
But thanks for the help Dorkin!!
Dorkin🐴:
CHASE COMR BACK
WE ARENT FINISHED
CHASE!?
CHASE COME BACK
—————————————————————
DIRECTLY MESSAGING: ‘Buddy🙄’
Chase:
Dude seriously I really am sorry
I didn’t mean it like that
I was just surprised is all
Swear by it
I thought you’d be like
Well I don’t know what I thought but I just wasn’t expecting a librarian
But that’s cool too
I don’t really like books much but my cousin does
I’m sure it’s a great job and all
Buddy??
????
This is the part where you message me back
Please I’m sorry
Oh right ur working
Well
Please respond soon
:(