Chapter Text
Growing up, Toya knew he wasn't exactly... part of the royal family.
It was obvious, his hair was nowhere near the same as his 'siblings', and his birthday was just weeks after the youngest daughter, which was physically impossible if he came from the same mother.
However, they treated him like one of them. For as long as he could remember, he'd been a Tenma.
But... as he got older, he started remembering things from before he got taken in.
Right.
He was only three when the eldest sibling found him abandoned in front of their home; crying and afraid.
He was taught that children of that age often forget events as they grow, but it was the opposite for him— he suddenly remembered everything as he hit his early teens.
He remembers taking a walk with his father in the rain after angering him.
He remembers being too afraid to ask the frustrated man where they were going.
He remembers being told to stay put in front of a large stone building as his father walked away, never to come back for him.
He remembers the heavy wooden door slowly opening and a blond child not much older than him looking around in a panic, grabbing his arm and dragging him into the building.
Since then, that boy became his brother Tsukasa. He had a sister named Saki, too. Those two were absolutely inseparable and quickly let Toya join in with their fun.
For a while, he accepted it.
But... as he got older, he started to feel an overwhelming sense of loneliness.
He wasn't alone, he knew that. But, just recalling the moment his own father left him behind only made the hole in his heart grow.
He shut himself out from everyone and everything, he stopped speaking to people, he simply... tried to disappear from the family entirely.
He wasn't really a part of it, why should it matter if he appears at royal events or stands with the king for family photos?
He even took back his old last name that he managed to remember during a particularly dark time, Aoyagi.
The Tenmas were upset about his choice, but they respected his individuality regardless.
Reading became his only vice, the only thing he could use to escape when he needed a break from reality. Reading is not inherently bad or anything, but it definitely caused a rift in his sleep schedule. He was constantly tired going into his teen years, but it was better than pretending to be something he isn't.
As he was headed to the library one afternoon, the king spots him just before he could open the door.
"Oh, Toya." He smiles as the boy. "Back to the library I see."
Toya simply nods and pushes the door open, entering silently.
He puts his old books back where they belong and leaves the room to return to his own. However, the king seemed to have waited for him outside the door.
"Toya," the man starts, "how... are you feeling today?" He speaks carefully, like one wrong word could make it worse.
They try to get Toya to express himself often despite knowing that they likely won't get anywhere. It's not that Toya was emotionless, he just doesn't know what he's feeling nor how to show it.
"Fine," he replies in the same low, monotone voice as always. "Excuse me." He turns and heads in the direction of his room.
"Ah— Toya, w-wait..!" The king panics. "I— I was looking for you, actually. I wanted to ask you something."
"You already did," Toya states blankly, turning back to the man. "Is there something else?"
"Yes..." The king sighs at Toyas blatantness that he should've honestly expected. "There's someone I'd like you to meet; the son of a family of sorcerers that moved here yesterday."
"Why?" Toya questions, glancing at the floor.
"Because his family be working close with us, it'd be nice if my children could befriend him." Toya opens his mouth to speak, "—all of my children, you included." The king concludes.
Toya shuts his mouth with a sigh. "Do... I have to?"
"I would certainly appreciate it." The king smiles. "But... if you are really against it... you may go back to your room."
Toya stands there for a few agonizingly long seconds, hands balled into fists at his sides. It isn't often the king asks Toya to join things like that— mainly because he knows Toya wouldn't want to go in the first place.
"I..." he starts, furrowing his brows in frustration. "...okay," he mumbles.
"Y-you'll come with me?" The king questions, suprise evident in his tone.
Toya hesitantly nods. "I... I will. Now?" He looks up at the man, avoiding eye contact as usual.
He sees the king straighten himself up and clear his throat. "Yes. I was just headed there."
"Do I... need to change?"
"No, what you're wearing now is fine." The king smiles down at him. "Well then... let's go."
Toya nods and anxiously follows the king to the throne room where the other Tenmas were already waiting.
"Oh, Toya..?" Tsukasa was the first to mention him. "You're joining us today?"
"...yes." Toya nods and stands beside him with his hands behind his back, teething at his cheek.
"It's good to see you, Toya~" Saki hums from her spot and Toya could hear her smile.
All Toya could do was nod. He was already regretting agreeing to this, he wasn't supposed to be here with them... why do they keep letting him do this?
"As I mentioned," the kings voice rings through the hollow room to break the silence, "there is a new sorcerer family that has joined us. Tsukasa, Saki, you've met the parents already, yes?"
The siblings both give a simultaneous 'yes, father', and the man nods.
"Well, they have a young son as well. He was unable to join the initial meeting due to some... personal matters." He sighs. "But, he agreed to meet you all on his own today!" The king beams, getting small gasps from the teens.
"A son?! How old?!" Tsukasa eagerly questions.
"Your age, actually. You're just ome month older than him."
Tsukasa tries to hold back his audible excitement as he quietly taps his fingers together in response.
"Well..." the king settles his son. "Go on, let him in." He gestures to the door where a knight nods and grabs the handle.
The door opens and in walks a young sorcerer with long, bright purple hair tied back in a small ponytail. He wore a monocle and an assortment of shiny earrings to match his dark cloak that flowed behind.
Toya could tell that he was anxious. Anyone his age would be. He watched the sorcerers eyes fly across the throne room in awe, admiring the architecture.
"Kamishiro Rui," the king starts, "I'm glad you were able to join us today."
The teen jolted slightly as his eyes flew to the king. "O-oh, yes." He bows deeply. "It's... a pleasure, really."
When Rui stands, he looks over to the three teens on his right with a small tilt of the head.
"These are my children. Tsukasa, Saki, and Toya." The king gestures to the others, urging them to greet him back.
The blonds give him shining smiles and happy waves, while Toya... simply gave him a small nod while refusing to look at him any further than necessary.
Toya could feel the sorcerers eyes heavy on him. Not judgmental, but curious— interested.
As the kings voice started again, the pressure disappeared as Ruis focus shifted.
"I look forward to having you and your family in this village." He gives Rui a bow of his own. "I do hope you all find your place here."
"Thank you, your majesty." Rui bows one final time and the king grants them all permission to talk and get acquainted.
Immediately, Tsukasa and Saki rush up and interrogate him on his magic while Toya turns and leaves the room without another word. As always, he heads straight to his bedroom until dinner.
A week goes by without any interaction between him and the sorcerer— not that he really cared. The sorcerer was just another person to him, nothing special. Sure, he's is quite literally magical, and that's admirable in it's own way, but Toya has absolutely zero intention of getting close with him.
Friendships are too much for him. Too much responsibility and possibility of losing them. Who would put themselves through something like that by choice?
He chooses not to think about it.
As always, he was in the library once again searching for something to read.
He's read all types of books. Books on animals, the human body, even music— the one thing he learned he is relatively skilled at and will utilize at events if a piano is present.
He could always reread those, but he was wanting something different today. So, he journeys to the further shelves to look for a genre he typically wouldn't read about.
As he scanning the shelves with his finger, the library door opens and shuts. It was nothing unusual, anyone associated with the royal family is allowed in that room— family members, knights, chefs, even the maids.
He assumed it was likely a maid on her break and continued his search. As he turns the corner of one of the shelves, he learns who the mystery guest was.
The same purple hair, the same monocle, the same cloak.
"Oh, good morning your highness." The same voice.
Toya eyes the sorcerer in confusion.
"You... don't talk much, do you?" Rui chuckles softly. "Before you question me, the king granted my family permission to use this library as well. I am not breaking in, I promise."
Ah... that makes sense. The king did say the Kamishiros would be working closely with them.
So, Toya nods, looks away, and goes to the opposite side of the room. Again, Ruis eyes were on him with every step until Toya hid himself behind a shelf.
He resumes his search in silence before a loud crash and panicked yelp snapped him from his peaceful thoughts.
He flinches and cautiously peeks around the corner to find a shelf completely diagonal with books hovering motionless in the air. Shifting his eyes down, he sees Rui kneeling on the ground with his hands above his head, a faint red mist covering his palms.
Toyas eyes go completely wide at the sight. He knew Rui could do magic, but such... strong magic like levitating heavy objects?! He thought only adult sorcerers were able to do that!
"U-uh, your highness?" Ruis voice breaks his shock, words strained. "A— a little help, please?" Rui winces, making the bookshelf tilt slightly more forward toward him.
Toya jolts and rushes up to him, pulling him out from under the danger when Ruis magic officially gives out and the items fall... along with Rui; he falls to his knees with heaving breaths, completely drained.
"Thank you..." Rui breathes.
Before Toya could even think of replying, the door swings open and multiple knights and staff rushes in.
"What happened?!" One knight— one with short purple hair— questions.
"Ah... Sir Asahina..." Rui chuckles weakly. "It seems the bookshelf has broken... my apologies..."
The knights sighs. "Are you two alright?"
They both nod in response; Rui with a heavy breath of exhaustion as he rubs his hands.
The other knights investigate the damage, finding the source to be one of the legs of the bookshelf to have snapped under pressure.
"We'll bring someone in to fix this... please be careful walking around, your highness."
Toya looks away with a small nod. "...you too," he mutters in Ruis direction, noticing how they seemed to ignore him.
Rui looks up at him from the ground with a small smile. "Thank you." He whispers a reply and stands up.
For the time being, the teens were told to exit the library and spend their time somewhere else until the shelf was fixed.
As they walk in silence around the castle for a while, Rui speaks up. "So... your highness—"
"Aoyagi," Toya cuts him off.
Rui blinks. "Sorry?"
"I... would prefer if you called me Aoyagi." Toya specifies.
"Aoyagi..?" Rui echoes. "I... don't understand."
With a sigh, Toya lowered his head. "It's my name."
"But, I thought you were Ten—"
"I'm not."
Rui flinched. Toyas tone had shifted from somewhat monotone to something akin to anger. "O-oh..." he swallowed his nerves. "I... see. I apologize."
They go quiet and continue the awkward walk to the castles courtyard.
Toya wasn't sure why Rui was still there. He never asked to join him, he never said he was going to the same place... why was Rui following him? Can't he see that Toya wants to be alone?
He pushed his frustrations away and simply took a seat by the large fountain in the center of the courtyard, pulling out the book he managed to grab before leaving the library. He wasn't exactly paying attention to what the picked up, and to his surprise... it was a book about magic.
He's read a book like that once and hasn't touched them since. They simply weren't his thing. But... it's the only book he has at the moment, so he decided to give it a chance.
He flips it open and begins reading. It was specifically about potions and spells, something he didn't actually know much about, so at least he's got that going for him.
As he read in silence, Rui was over to the side looking around at the flowers and agriculture.
"This place truly is lovely." Rui sighs in contentment, sitting beside Toya who seemed unfazed by his words.
Taking notice of the princes desire to be on his own, Rui goes silent once again, kicking his ankles against the marble fountain.
Eventually, Toya reaches a page about telekinetic abilities. According to the information he reads, most sorcerers or magic bearing individuals can only master that ability in adulthood.
He glances at Rui from the corner of his eye who was toying with a small fallen flower petal. He was definitely curious about how powerful Rui was given the fact that he was able to do such magic.
"Oh~? You're reading about magic?"
Toya flinches and looks up at the teens face whose eyes were now locked on Toyas book, leaning over to read as well. The prince backed away slightly, Rui did as well.
"Oh, my apologies." Rui apologizes. "But... if you're curious about magic... you could always just ask me," he offers with a warm smile.
Toya cautiously eyes the sorcerer, looking around at all of the accessories littering his outfit. Soon, they reach his hand, hesitant to speak before looking away. "You..." he starts in a quiet voice, "you held the shelf up."
"I did, yes."
"...how?" Toya fidgets with the page of his book. "You... are only a teen."
"My parents always said I was a bit stronger than others." Rui returns to swinging his legs. "I learned many spells years before others could, telekinesis included. Well, it is not mastered yet, but I'm working on it." He lifts his finger and points towards Toys book before the red mist from before appears and the book was lifting up into his hand. "Fun, right?"
Toya watches in awe before turning away. "I... suppose so."
"Aoyagi... may I ask you a question?"
The princes tenses up before nodding.
"You... don't like associating with the rest of the royal family. Why so? They seem to enjoy having you around like a family member... no?"
Toya lowers his head. "I..." he sighs. "I am not part of this family, no matter how much they say that I am. At the end of the day... I'm just some abandoned kid they took in ten years ago."
"I... I see." Ruis head lowers as well. "However... family is not always blood."
"What do you mean?" Toya furrows his brows.
"I mean, family is simply... people you feel safe around." Rui smiles. "They're people or a person you trust more than anything. You don't need to be related to them to be family."
"...trust?" Toya whispers to himself. Sure, he trusts the Tenmas, but... was that really all it took? He would love to be their family, but does he really deserve that title?
"Aoyagi," Rui softly gets his attention.
Toya flinches and looks over at him, finding Rui giving him a small, warm smile. "Y-yes?"
"I hope you find your reason one day."
Toyas shoulders fall with a heavy exhale. "What..?"
"Rui~! It's time to go home!"
Rui swings his head back to see his mother waving him over. "Oh! I need to go now." He hands Toya the book and stands up. "I shall see you another day, Prince Aoyagi." He waves as he rushes off to his mother and disappears.
The prince blinks as he's suddenly left alone and... very confused. His eyes fall to the book, only to see the page it was open to.
The study of reanimation.
Why would it be open to that? Was Rui planning on raising the dead or something?
No, maybe he was just flipping through and it just so happened to land on that one.
Such a strange person Rui is. First he is suddenly freakishly talented for a fourteen year old, and now he seems to be attempting to... what, befriend Toya? Why?
He isn't anyone worth befriending.
With a sigh, Toya collects the book and returns to his room until dinner.
For the next week or so, Toya would occasionally run into Rui as the sorcerer was working with the Tenmas. Whether it was discussing potions, plants, even magic gems, he was there.
He was always there.
If Toya didn't know any better, he'd think Rui was following him.
He did a decent job at avoiding him, until he returned to the library one afternoon. The bookshelf was fixed and it was finally safe to enter. Of course, he took the chance as soon as he got it.
Just as he thought, though... Rui was there first.
He simply sighs and walks past him to another shelf without acknowledging him.
Rui reaches up with the same red mist from before and grabs a couple books of his own and skims through them, groaning when they don't seem to be the ones he was looking for.
Then... he starts walking towards Toya.
"Aoyagi..?"
Toya flinches and hesitantly looks at him. "Yes?"
"Have you any idea where the books on biology would be..?" Rui pouts. "I can't seem to find them..."
Blinking, Toya turns back to his shelf.
Of course.
Right in front of him... was the biology section.
He takes a large step back. "Here."
"Oh! You can grab yours!" Rui holds his hands out. "You were here first, after all." He gives that same feline like smile Toya saw the first day he arrived.
"...thank you." Toya reaches out to grab his book, immediately turning around and writing it on the log for the librarian.
He chose a book about the heart. The concept of the heart harboring emotions always confused him. Feelings are in the mind, aren't they?
As he shuts by the window and cracks it open, Rui places himself but to far away... reading about the brain.
First reanimation, now the brain? What is he getting at?
The teens read in silence for a while before Rui suddenly speaks up. "Aoyagi... may I ask you a question?"
Toya nods with his eyes still glued to his page.
"Why do you think people have a hard time understanding emotions?"
Toyas eye twitches. Was that a targeted question or something? "What do you mean?"
"I mean, the human brain works in such curious ways. It tells the rest of our body what to do and how to do it flawlessly... so where is the disconnect when it comes to feelings? Why do we not understand those as well as everything else?" Rui taps his fingers along his page. "Does it send the emotions to the heart—" he points at Toyas book, small sparkles surrounding it as a small line moves in his direction, "—but they get lost along the way?" The magic thread he created knots in the center, cutting off half of the thread from reaching Toyas book and the sparkles vanish.
"And, what makes even less sense is why emotions are different for each person." He sighs. "While one may react excitedly towards something, another may be afraid of it... I can only wonder why that is. Unlike books, we cannot read our own emotions, much less someone elses."
Toya stares down at the magical thread between them. "Why are you asking me? I wouldn't know."
"Because I cannot read you, Aoyagi." Rui replies without missing a beat, making Toya shudder.
"...what?" Toya looks up at him.
"Unlike your siblings, you're a closed book." Rui shuts his own book for emphasis. "You don't speak, you keep all your contents to yourself under lock and key..." a small, glowing lock appears on top of the leather book, prohibiting it from opening. "I wish to read you, as well... but I cannot."
"Me?" Toya furrows his brows. "Why?"
"Every book deserves a chance, no?"
For some reason... that really frustrated Toya. Who does Rui think he is, interrogating him like this?
Toya stands, grabs his book, and turns around. "Maybe not every book wishes to be read." He takes one step before Rui replies.
"But why, Aoyagi?"
"Because maybe their contents aren't important enough to be learned about." Toya huffs, his tone much harsher than usual.
He could almost feel the way Ruis shoulders fell, his playful personality disappearing within seconds.
"You... think you are unimportant?" The sorcerer carefully questions. His voice had shifted. The typical sly, curious tone completely replaced with a soft, gentle concern.
Toya bites his inner cheek, regretting speaking up in the first place. He takes a deep breath and continues walking towards the exit without responding, leaving Rui alone.
He immediately goes to his bedroom, locking it and hiding away like always. This time, though... he couldn't force his cries down any longer.
He curls up against his door and quietly sobs into his knees.
He doesn't even know why he was crying.
Was he sad? Frustrated? He had no idea.
All he knows is that everything Rui said stuck with him and will probably never go away no matter how hard he tries to drown it out.
Rui was dangerous.
Toya doesn't like feeling things, he's perfectly content how he is.
If Rui plans on coaxing those feelings out... Toya needed to avoid him at all costs.
The only person that needs to know about them is Toya and nobody else.
They shouldn't matter to anyone else.
As his cries die down, his eyes shift to the forgotten book by his feet.
That stupid, unless heart on the cover stares back at him through his tears— taunting him for his own heart being so fragile.
He lets out a weak, shuddering breath and forces himself off the floor to place the book on his desk before sitting on the edge of his bed. His shoulders falling to a slouch and his head lowered as he stared down at the floor.
Ridiculous.
He felt ridiculous.
Crying over someone saying they want to understand him? Who does that?
Why couldn't he just accept Ruis words like Tsukasa or Saki could have— would have? Why did he have to be so stubborn and run away like a child?
...why didn't he run away back then, too?
If he did, maybe he wouldn't feel like this. If he just ran away and lived on the streets instead... maybe he'd at least know how to feel things properly.
He would understand the value of his own emotions.
But no... he selfishly took the help and love this family gave him and what happened? He never learned how to give it back.
He went dull.
But Rui... what was his goal? To siphon the emotions from Toyas heart and run away with them? To pick him apart and leave him to fend for himself?
Nothing good comes from expressing himself, so he's learned.
But maybe Rui was being honest. Maybe he really just wanted to understand Toya better.
Even so... Toya can't let himself succumb to that kindness, not again.
He doesn't want to be broken any more than he already is.
With a heavy sigh, he flops backwards until his head hit the stiff mattress and his gaze landed on the ceiling. "Stupid," he mutters to himself— about himself.
He remained there until dinner, only to once again fail to sleep until the sun had already begun to rise the next morning.
That's how it's always been, and that's how it will stay.
For better or for worse, he'll stick to himself.