Chapter Text
<Rocky miss many Grace birthdays, question?!>
Grace is bent over one of the lab’s workstations tapping away at his laptop, but is jolted out of his tunnel vision as Rocky wails at his feet. He had mentioned one of his early childhood memories of being at a birthday party, which of course prompted a whole line of questioning from Rocky, who then learned the cultural significance of human birthdays… which was a mistake.
Now Grace is trapped in close quarters with his best friend coming to terms with these facts:
a) Birthdays are an important human cultural ritual
b) Grace has missed probably 4-10 birthdays in space
c) Grace missed at LEAST 12-26 birthdays on Earth
e) GRACE INTENTIONALLY DID NOT TELL ROCKY
Grace doesn’t know whether to laugh or groan. He settles for a pained smile as he turns away from his work to face his friend. “Rocky, please, it’s not a big deal!”
Rocky lets out a shriek. <IS BIG DEAL! Grace too stupid idiot to see!>
Grace winces at the shrill sounds. “Rock, you know the whole time-dilation thing makes that complicated. Why would I bother to keep track? Even I don’t really know how old I am.”
This is mostly true. He was 32 when he… left Earth, and made it to Tau Ceti in a little under 4 years. But because the Hail Mary travelled at a constant 1.5g acceleration, time moved much slower for the people back on his home planet. By the time he’d met Rocky and reached Tau Ceti, his middle schoolers would have graduated from college, some maybe having kids of their own. And by the time the beetles made their return to Earth’s atmosphere… Well, they’d be around… 38? That’s pretty close to his age. Actually, some of them might be older than him.
He tries not to think about that too much.
Rocky stamps his feet and lets out a slew of disjointed, aggressive whistles and chirps. Grace feels like he’s being verbally pummeled into jelly.
<Why Grace not tell Rocky, question? Rocky Grace best friend! Rocky want show Grace Rocky care!>
Grace pinches the bridge of his nose. “I know, I know. I’m sorry, Rocky. I know that you care. It’s just,” he sighs, “I never really cared that much about birthdays to begin with, and it’s gotten so hard to tell time up here. It just… didn’t feel important. Especially with everything that’s happened lately.”
Rocky pauses for a moment, considering. Then he hums a low, sonorous note. It sounds a little annoyed, but less angry than before.
<Is important to Rocky. Know humans do not get many many years like Eridians. Rocky want make each one special.>
Grace immediately deflates. “Aw, bud,” Grace feels his eyes prickle with emotion. He kneels down and places a hand on top of his xenonite ball. “I’m sorry for not saying anything. I love you, Rocky.”
Rocky clicks in response and reaches his claw to meet Grace’s palm on the other side of the shell.
<Is okay. Love you too.>
He taps the xenonite twice, tap tap, and Grace returns it. They sit there for a moment in a comfortable silence. Before Grace can stand, Rocky takes advantage of the sweet moment and whistles,
<Grace have birthday party soon. Must make up for lost time.>
“Really, Rock? Do we have to?” He tries to smother his amusement with a scoff, but Rocky ignores him.
<Grace not tell Rocky about importance of birthdays. Is price must pay.>
His friend rolls away before Grace can make a good enough counterargument, the clunk-clunk-clunk of his shell fading quickly as he turns right and heads down the hall to the medical bay.
Grace can’t help but smile. Rocky can be a lot, but he loves his people so fiercely. It’s something Grace deeply admires about his friend, even if it results in his own discomfort sometimes.
Grace eventually lifts himself off of the floor, his joints groaning. He reaches above his head and leans back into a stretch before returning to his laptop. He’s currently researching the possibilities of making his own food, but he hasn’t been very successful so far. The amount of rations on board have been very slowly dwindling away. Soon, it’s going to become a big problem. Being the only human aboard has stretched supplies much further than originally anticipated, but he’s still bound to run out at some point. Better to get a jump on it while he can.
He looks over at the small selection of plants growing in the corner of the lab. They live on a white tower with four shelves, each one carefully labeled. Most of them are still seeds that Grace has kept in stasis, since he doesn’t have enough of a green thumb to keep a bunch alive at once. There aren’t enough of them to be a real sustainable food source– If anything, they’re mostly good for seasoning. And they’re still sprouts, even though he started growing them at least two years ago. He thinks something about the environment out here has stunted them. A bitter voice slithers into Grace’s consciousness, saying, ‘They aren’t so different from yourself. Frozen in time and space. Never changing, never growing. They wouldn’t have lived this long back on Earth. Neither of you are from the same time you used to be. You are forever changed. You can never return.’
Grace shakes his head to clear it. That kind of thinking won’t help. Quit it, he thinks to himself.
Rocky rolls back into the lab a few hours later.
<Make discovery yet, question?>
Grace shakes his head, still hunched over his screen. “Not yet, buddy. It’s pretty slow going.”
<Grace should take break.>
Rocky’s right. He’s stared at his computer for so long that his vision is starting to get hazy. He rubs his eyes and turns around. “Well, what do you suggest we do instead?”
Grace has either learned some of Rocky’s mannerisms, or Rocky has adopted Grace’s behaviors to help them communicate better. Maybe a bit of both. Rocky grows very still and hums a very low note, which Grace realizes is his thinking face. He stays that way for a few seconds until he perks back up.
<Grace want hear stories about Erid?>
Grace always wants to hear stories about Rocky’s home planet, just as much as Rocky wants to hear about Earth. He thinks that anyone would want to learn more about their alien best friend’s culture, but maybe that’s just his science brain.
Grace tries to keep working as they chat, but he eventually pushes his laptop to the side. He listens to Rocky with his head propped up on his hands as his friend talks about Adrian, his mate.
<Adrian very big! So big, almost 3 Rockys!>
He scuttles around the room in excitement as he talks about them, gesturing above him in a way that Grace can only understand as him trying to show just how large his mate is.
<On Erid, size very important. Can help protect others. Bigger Eridian more beautiful.>
Grace giggles. “So what I’m hearing is, Adrian’s way out of your league.”
Rocky stomps his foot.
<Yes. Rocky not worthy of Adrian. Adrian love Rocky very much to choose Eridian so small.>
“Aw, I’m sure they love you for much more than that. You’re pretty great yourself.”
Rocky turns to look at some of the xenonite figures that he’s made. They sit on another worktable as a group: mini Grace, mini Rocky, and his planetary model for Erid’s solar system. Rocky grows quiet for a while. Then, he says,
<...Eridians do not dream. But if Rocky did dream, would dream of Adrian.>
That comment tugs fiercely at Grace’s heart. He wants so badly to reunite his friend with his love, but they still have a while yet to go.
When he taught in San Francisco, he got a lot of students who were from somewhere else, and missed home all the time. He’s reminded now of a tactic he was taught to use when that happened:
“What do you miss about them, Rocky? What would you dream about?”
Rocky thinks for a long time.
<Would dream of their voice. Adrian voice like wind through caves. Long and low. And beautiful. Rocky… ♪♫ for Adrian.>
“That word’s not in your translator. What does it mean?”
<To miss very deep. Want very bad to be near them. Would do anything to see Adrian.>
“Hmm…” Grace crosses over to the computer that runs Rocky’s translator software. “Maybe… yearn? That sounds right.” He types in the new word.
<Yes. Rocky yearn for Adrian.>
Over the next few hours, they laugh and trade stories, and Rocky serenades Grace with his favorite Eridian operas. Throughout it all, Grace can’t help but enjoy himself. He finds himself hoping that once they get to Erid, the rest of his life can be spent like this, in laughter and love and time spent with his best friend. A happy, simple life. That would be wonderful.
Apparently, it is too much to ask for.
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