Chapter Text
“Adora, how do we get out?”
Catra hated this. She just wanted to leave and get away from everything. She had suffered enough from a war she didn’t even know how it started. She was done with all of it.
“You have to stay here Catra, you can’t come out” Adora said.
“What do you even mean, where are we even?!”
Catra said, hands shaking in anger.
“We’re in your head Catra calm down, everything is okay.” She tried to put her hand on Catra’s shoulder only for the girl to throw it down.
“Literally nothing is okay right now Adora!” She yelled out. “I’ve had to relive the worst day of my life for star’s know how long only to get out to find out I WAS REPLACED.” Adora took a step back away from Catra. For fear that she would strike out. “I found out I got replaced not one but twice because I was never enough! Not for you! For shadow weaver! NOT EVEN MY OWN PARENTS!” Tears were pouring down her fuzzy cheeks.
Adora saw that she was gradually getting calmer. Catra needed this. She needed to get all of this off her shoulder. Adora wanted to help her, to hold her and tell her everything is okay. But in some ways Catra is right, not everything is okay right now. Catra has had to suffer so much because of Shadow Weaver.
Catra stopped yelling and crumbled. “I don’t want to stay here,” she whispered. She fell to her knees, bending over sobbing.
“I’m so sorry Catra, I’m so sorry” Adora said over and over as she knelt down to Catra. She just held her while she cried, whispering into her ears that she was here, that she was sorry.
After what seemed like lifetimes Catra had fallen asleep in Adora’s arms. Adora held her but felt something was wrong. Her foot began glowing, it wasn’t a She-Ra glow but it was still a bright flash from her foot. It spread like a disease but it didn’t hurt.
“Catra wake up.” She said to Catra, shaking her.
“It’s time” Catra woke up immediately at those words.
“You can’t leave me Adora, please.” Adora cupped her face looking deeply into mismatched eyes, both equally as beautiful.
“I’m not leaving you Catra, never again. Once I get back out we’ll be able to do stuff in the real world. I’ll do anything and everything I can to protect you Catra, I promise.”
Those words that Catra once cursed now meant the world to her. She watched as the rest of Adora’s body was enveloped in a glow that spread to the rest of the white abyss.
-*-*-*-*-*-*-*
The two woke up at the same time, one in shackles and the other next to her. As soon as Catra registered that she couldn’t move her hands or legs her obsidian black claws slid out in an attempt to free herself.
Adora practicaly lept to Catra’s aid and held her chained wrists.
“Where are we, where am I?!” Catra yelled in a panic, her hands shaking.
“Catra calm down you’re in our camp you’re okay” Adora said trying to calm her down. Catra’s eyes were pinpricks as she tried to slow her breathing, her heart felt as if her heart was about to beat out of her chest.
“Nonononono” Catra didn't want to be here, this is the last place she wanted to be right now. The last place she remembered where she physically was was Shadow Weaver’s chamber now she was in a tent in the middle of who knows where with the enemy(?) surrounding her.
Needless to say this was a change in scenery, after all she has only been outside the fright zone a handful of times and even then she came out as a soldier, a force captain, an invader.
Her breath became less shallow as she took in her surroundings, there were two cots and a small side table in between. The metal shackles around her wrists were cold and a bit tight. Adora’s blue eyes were duler than she remembered but it had been a while since she saw them without She-Ra, not to mention that it’s been a while since she saw them.
Her hair was loose in her signature ponytail, a few blonde hairs cascading down her face.
She couldn't do this. Catra couldn’t be around Adora. Adora’s hands felt too familiar, too comforting a presence, Adora knew her too well.
“Catra, I’m going to take off your cuffs, just give me a second.” Adora spoke softly, her voice wavering slightly. Adora’s hands felt soothing against her wrists as she took a key that Catra didn't even know she had, to unlock her cuffs. Catra quickly withdrew her hands form Adora’s grasp as she rubbed her wrists, there were small dents in her fur and light bruising around the rims from where the cuffs were.
“Catra, are you okay? Are you alright?” Adora asked her. Catra felt anger and hate bubble up in her chest. The urge to yell and scream at Adora was more that prevelent. Of course she wasn’t okay, she had been stuck in her head with no concept of time for who knows how long. It was hard to control her body as well as she used to. Her fingers occasionally twitched or her tail lashed in a way she couldn’t control. She hated it but Adora hadn’t noticed and yet she was asking her if she was okay.
“I want to be alone right now.” She replied meekly. Catra couldn’t find a valid reason to really dig into Adora. It wouldn’t do anything of value other than insult the only person that seemed to have her back or was willing to help her.
Adora looked disappointed but she didn't protest. She turned to leave as Catra watched her.
As soon as Adora left she started to sob. Catra didnt even know why she was crying, was it sadness?
Remorse?
Greif?
Maybe she was just overwhelmed.
Maybe she didn't have to know why.
Maybe she needed this.
Needed to cry.
She felt so overwhelmed. So many memories were flooding her head all at once. The screams, the cries of pain and agony, so many disembodied voices begging for mercy. She had done it all.
She had killed so many people and caused so much pain and couldn't even ask for forgiveness. She shouldn't be forgiven. Not after all this.
After what she’d done to so many innocents.
She deserved to die.
As the memories continued to return in bits and pieces, she remembers a little vial filled with a singular black pill. Quickly she patted down her pockets, hoping it was still there, hoping the pain would end.
Then she remembered. They took it from her.
“DAMNIT!” she screamed at herself.
“Damnit” Catra repeated softly.
She should have learned a long time ago that nothing, nothing, ever goes her way.