1 - 20 of 31 Bookmarks by Assumare
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“Would a more kinaesthetic approach suffice, then?”
“A-are you suggesting grabbing my arse?”
“I’m suggesting, that since this seems to be a topic of great interest to you, Snow, I can charitably offer you a lesson in the basics.”
Snow unleashes an agitated groan. Merlin, I don’t know how the boy can manage to keep up such a froth for so long. (Though I’ve somehow managed to keep up an erection for this long, so I’m not one to speak on the matter of indecorous stamina.)
“You’ve never offered to tutor me in anything before!” he yammers.
“Precisely.” I curl my lip at him. “So don’t expect me to ever be so generous with my offers of elucidation ever again.”
Baz gets caught with a dildo up his arse, which results in an awkward conversation about the benefits of anal stimulation.
Simon is admittedly curious, and, well, so long as it's something straight blokes can enjoy too, there's no reason not to let Baz show him the ropes...right?- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 54,686
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 361
- Kudos:
- 2,967
- Bookmarks:
- 537
- Hits:
- 63,194
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
11 Aug 2024
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In which Baz finds he rather likes having Simon walk in on him 'taking care of himself' and starts redirecting his plotting towards making it happen again.
(Formerly: 5 Times Simon Walked In On Baz Wanking and 1 Time He Told Him To, literally nothing else has changed, this is the exact same fic. It just needed a title that wasn't shite. Also it ended up only vaguely a 5+1 so...)
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 25,470
- Chapters:
- 6/6
- Comments:
- 243
- Kudos:
- 3,644
- Bookmarks:
- 486
- Hits:
- 59,798
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
11 Aug 2024
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Heatwave by Fletcher_is_a_fangirl
Fandoms: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell, Fangirl - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow series - Gemma T. Leslie
29 May 2016
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Set a few months after the end of Carry On. Baz is sneakily working Simon's hormones up - but just because Simon doesn't go off magically anymore doesn't mean he won't crack under pressure...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 6,151
- Chapters:
- 3/3
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 111
- Kudos:
- 4,259
- Bookmarks:
- 452
- Hits:
- 63,017
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
11 Aug 2024
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Simon and Baz aren't enemies anymore – they aren't together either, but they're friends. The best of friends.
They definitely aren't engaged, but that's not what Simon told his grandmother and his uncle in a moment of panic ...
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 47,489
- Chapters:
- 5/5
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 392
- Kudos:
- 860
- Bookmarks:
- 179
- Hits:
- 15,113
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
11 Aug 2024
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Restoration Ecology by aralias for SHARKMARTINI
Fandoms: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
19 Feb 2022
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Simon has never forgiven Baz for ruining his life at the start of eighth year. He’d hoped never to see Baz again. Ever. But when Baz applies for a position on the Coven, it’s impossible not to hire him. So – now, they’re working together. And as much as Simon wants to continue hating Baz, the dead spots between them are starting to heal …
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 51,073
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Comments:
- 629
- Kudos:
- 1,007
- Bookmarks:
- 262
- Hits:
- 20,126
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
11 Aug 2024
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There's No Place Like Home by annabellelux
Fandoms: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell, Simon Snow & Related Fandoms
03 Jan 2020
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Summary
Simon got away from the Humdrum at the end of 7th year by teleporting back to Watford—which Simon thought was all well and good, until he started teleporting to Baz over the summer at the most awkward possible times.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 15,650
- Chapters:
- 2/2
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 213
- Kudos:
- 3,450
- Bookmarks:
- 526
- Hits:
- 31,287
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
01 Jul 2024
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There is nothing Simon Snow loves more in life than football. And there's really nothing in Baz Pitch's life other than football.
Baz Pitch is the star player of Mummers United FC, a low tier club he's singled-handedly put on the maps, along with the tiny northern town of Watford-on-Mummers. Simon Snow is a footie fanatic, founder of the MumU supporter section, and owner of the Sun and Goat pub. He's built a living out of watching Baz play, and it doesn't even matter that they haven't spoken since they were kids. Simon knows, no matter what, Baz Pitch is going to be the greatest player England has ever seen.
So why is Baz Pitch living in a middle terrace in the middle of nowhere, day drinking and doing (bad) yoga?
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 56,800
- Chapters:
- 18/18
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 1,320
- Kudos:
- 4,532
- Bookmarks:
- 1,026
- Hits:
- 60,829
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
01 Jul 2024
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Baz Pitch is set to take over Grimm's Real Estates one day - but he's not even sure if that's what he wants to do in life. Before he can decide, however, his Father falls in a dispute with Watford Institute for the Conservation of Nature over building plans in a protected area. As the heir of the company, Baz gets dragged into the fight, but he finds himself siding more with the conservation ecologist Simon Snow rather than with his Father.
This is a story about capitalist scum, ridiculously fit ornithologists and saving the Mummer's moor.Series
- Part 1 of Arrival of the birds
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
20 Mar 2024
Bookmarker's Notes
Simon's an ornithologist! Very cozy vibes
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keep your brittle heart warm by aalstroemeria
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
20 Aug 2023
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For every excruciating minute he was gone, all I could see every time I closed my eyes was some variation of this: Baz, my Baz, in pain – the harsh lines of his face contorted, his eyes squeezed shut, his fangs filling his mouth, and no one to help him.
Baz gets kidnapped. It doesn’t take Simon 6 weeks.
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
08 Sep 2023
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Stress Management by whogaveyoupermission
Fandoms: Simon Snow & Related Fandoms, Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
22 Dec 2022
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Summary
It's been ten years since Watford graduation, a whole decade since Simon last saw Baz, his boarding school roommate. And yeah--he thinks about Baz a lot. He's the reason Simon realised he's queer, after all. So accidentally stumbling into Baz's barre class? Sure. It affects him. Of fucking course it does.
Baz, on the other hand, is absolutely unaffected, thank you very much, and yes--of course that's an all-out falsehood because fuck. How could he look at those moles and those curls and that horrifying coordination and remain unmoved? He's not a fucking robot, for fuck's sake. I mean, really--have you seen Snow is 5-inch inseams? Have you?
This is the story of Baz and Simon. Of slutty athletic wear and supreme thirsting. Of social work and barre classes. Of friendship and accidental dating. Of risotto and sofa snuggles. Of two people who used to know each other, who are learning each other anew.
This is the story of two people who find someone to hold their hand in the darkness.
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
17 Jun 2023
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Someone Wicked by artsyunderstudy
Fandoms: Carry On | Simon Snow Series - Rainbow Rowell
04 Sep 2023
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Summary
Baz Pitch has spent his entire life repressing who he is and what he wants, but everyone has a breaking point. He hires an escort for a single night. One night of touches, and kisses, and pushing everything else to the back of his mind. One night to just give in. At least, that was the plan.
The problem is ... he never could have anticipated Simon Snow.
And Simon definitely didn't anticipate him.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 60,317
- Chapters:
- 9/9
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 1,083
- Kudos:
- 1,567
- Bookmarks:
- 369
- Hits:
- 37,463
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
16 May 2023
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London Loves Us Only by imjusthereforthefreefood
Fandoms: Carry On Series - Rainbow Rowell
21 Jun 2022
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Summary
Simon moves to London to start new, only to find it paralyzingly large and lonely. Enter Baz Pitch.
An ode to dining solo, the London underground, and finding connection when you need it most.
Bookmarked by Scribble_tier (Assumare)
07 Mar 2023
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Summary
Baz Pitch loves his job. He’s a junior editor in his mother’s publishing company, and life would be perfect if it weren’t for two things: his boss, Davy Mage, and Sir Scone.
Sir Scone is the bane of Baz’s life. Trite children’s fantasy with a golden hero and ferocious dragons and intrepid princesses. They’re wildly popular, and Baz hates editing them almost as much as he hates the man who writes them: Simon Salisbury, Mage’s pet project author, and also maybe, possibly, the most handsome man Baz has ever met.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 33,778
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Collections:
- 2
- Comments:
- 1,040
- Kudos:
- 4,830
- Bookmarks:
- 959
- Hits:
- 40,649
Bookmarked by Assumare
11 Sep 2021
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Summary
“You told your dad. You have a boyfriend. To get under his skin. And it completely backfired?”
“Correct.” It looks like it pains Baz to admit it. Good.
“And now you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend at your house for a week?”
Or: Baz trying to find a way to hide the fact that he's in love with Simon Snow from Simon Snow whilst also pretending that he's pretending to be in love with Simon Snow.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 55,160
- Chapters:
- 14/14
- Comments:
- 268
- Kudos:
- 1,707
- Bookmarks:
- 256
- Hits:
- 29,592
Bookmarked by Assumare
08 Sep 2021
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Summary
Karkat Vantas has never had a peaceful life. His time on Alternia was full of fear of being culled and fighting to survive. During the rebellion, he never knew if he'd wake up alive or find a knife slipped between his ribs. As a council member for Empress Feferi, he assumed that he had put his life of fighting and survival behind him. Lucky for him, it doesn't and he gets to meet the crew of the Rogue of Void.
- Words:
- 108,748
- Works:
- 3
- Bookmarks:
- 17
Bookmarked by Assumare
13 Jan 2016
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Summary
Karkat Vantas is his village’s sacrifice to the royal family of the Humans, raised to be abstinent until the day he is given over to be part of a royal harem. On the day of his eighth wriggling day, the Humans arrive to take him.
Bookmarked by Assumare
08 Dec 2015
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Summary
Dave's job is pretty simple. All he has to do is make sure no one destroys the communications relay - the only reason humans and trolls are living together on this planet in the first place. And no one has tried to do that the entire time he's lived there.
So maybe this blind date his friend Kanaya has set him up with will be a nice change of pace. And maybe, eventually, his date won't be too attracted to him to consistently form complete sentences.
Bookmarked by Assumare
10 Oct 2015
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Summary
Dave Strider is shit out of luck and unable to afford his apartment. Karkat Vantas just needs a place to stay. Though the two are complete strangers, they will find that they have more in common than they ever thought possible.
EVERYONE IS QUEER AS FUCK AND NO ONE IS WHITE
Bookmarked by Assumare
17 Jul 2015
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dave and karkat are college roommates and that's literally it that's the whole fic by elliptical
Fandoms: Homestuck
22 Jul 2015
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Summary
Dave Strider and Karkat Vantas spend their first year of college as roommates, making a competition out of getting on each other's nerves and thanking every god in existence that they understand each other's neuroses. And maybe making out a little.
Bookmarked by Assumare
17 Jul 2015
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Summary
Dave is dead, and his soul is attached to his old phone. Karkat is hella broke and saved up to buy a phone, and just happened to want Dave's old phone. Now Dave is basically forced to follow Karkat around everywhere, and he doesn't actually mind. Karkat just wants to know if it's weird to be in love with the ghost guy who used to own his phone. That's pretty much it.
Bookmarked by Assumare
26 Jun 2015