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The Control and Regulation of Allocated Partners team at the ministry has assigned Dolores Umbridge to Severus Snape. Unless he comes up with an alternative he will be married to her within the month, which is more than inconvenient considering he's gay.
He goes to his friend, Harry Potter, to brainstorm solutions over a bottle of Firewhiskey.Series
- Part 1 of Whiskey weddings
Bookmarked by Divalee
25 Dec 2023
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It’s the Dumbledore’s Army Reunion Holiday, and Harry’s found himself in hot water with his friends once again, after telling them he has a boyfriend he definitely does not have. In an attempt to fix things, he’s made it his colleague on Level Nine, Draco Malfoy’s problem too. Featuring a ski chalet in Switzerland, a pair of bunk beds, and an agreement that should’ve been simple, were it not for all the bloody feelings getting in the way.
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- English
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- 29,987
- Chapters:
- 4/4
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- 1
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- 216
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Bookmarked by Divalee
21 Dec 2023
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Their magic thinks Harry and Severus are married. Severus tries to fight it because Harry is his student. Hijinks ensue!
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 11,075
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 19
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- 1,610
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- 263
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- 21,474
Bookmarked by Divalee
14 Dec 2023
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“Scientists have calculated that the chances of something so patently absurd actually existing are millions to one. But magicians have calculated that million-to-one chances crop up nine times out of ten.” - Terry Pratchett, Mort
or
Severus takes liquid luck and does, in fact, get lucky.
Bookmarked by Divalee
14 Dec 2023
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Through his time as a professor, Severus Snape offered Remedial Potions. The brewing was never really the point, though.
CW for depictions of suicidal ideation and societal stigmatisation of issues surrounding suicide. These issues are explored fairly deeply for such a short story, so please mind the tags in that regard, and note that there is character death, though only of OCs.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 7,685
- Chapters:
- 1/1
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- 1
- Comments:
- 62
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Bookmarked by Divalee
09 Dec 2023
