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  1. Tags
    Summary

    “What did you think of the concert, Phainon?”

    Phainon’s lips quirk up ruefully.

    “It was exhilarating as always. None of your sets ever gets old.”

    “And me?” he asks curiously. His hands clench into fists. “What does it look like while I’m on the stage?”

    The smile fades. Phainon bites his lips. His knuckles are white where they grip the yoke.

    “You look untouchable when you’re on the stage,” he says, the words resigned and sad. “Like a force of nature.”

    (It takes Mydei and Phainon eight plane rides to make their way home.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,502
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    24
    Kudos:
    341
    Bookmarks:
    55
    Hits:
    2,030
  2. Tags
    Summary

    There are a few truths Mydei has learned about Phainon over the years: his habits, his instincts, his hopes, his dreams. He’s learned the best ways to pull him out of a slump, and the worst too. He’s learned of Phainon’s partiality for sweets and antiques, and his dislike of bitterness and cruelty. He’s learned his determination, his hunger to prove, as boundless as his lack thereof of worth in the face of concepts like “fate” and “deliverance.”

    More importantly, he’s learned Phainon always comes when ordered.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,854
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    17
    Kudos:
    348
    Bookmarks:
    43
    Hits:
    3,351
  3. Tags
    Summary

    Phainon wakes to his Phaidei account exploding with notifications, a small war in his comments section, and half the people convinced he’s running the Phaidei account, with the top reply being:

    Deliberber @phaifan33550336
    replying to @phaidei
    Dawg look at my deliverer shipping himself with Mydeimos we’re cooked

    It’s enough for him to click on his Weaver account in a frenzied panic, scroll to the settings, and click “delete”—mashing all the buttons, captchas, and “deletes” until he finally sees the “This account no longer exists” on his page.

    “Oh my god,” he mutters, heart racing. He chucks his teleslate on his bed and flops back down.

    (In which Phainon, an idol, attempts to run a fan account shipping himself with his childhood best friend, Mydeimos—another idol.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,200
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    229
    Kudos:
    1,680
    Bookmarks:
    414
    Hits:
    12,495
  4. Tags
    Summary

    “You smell good,” Mydei murmurs, lips skimming across his skin. Phainon shivers, heat warming him like he’s entering his own rut. Mydei presses closer, his arms wrapping around Phainon’s waist. “Your skin is cold.”

    “You’re just running hot,” Phainon mutters, fingers flexing on Mydei’s waist. He feels high-strung, body coiled tight as he lets Mydei brush his cheek against his skin like a cat.

    Mydei huffs a laugh, and Phainon feels it rumble against him like an earthquake.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,150
    Chapters:
    2/2
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    693
    Bookmarks:
    110
    Hits:
    4,270
  5. Tags
    Summary

    “I didn’t do anything wrong, did I?”

    “You didn’t,” Mydei says, his gaze averting from Phainon. He takes a deep breath, steeling himself. “You did nothing wrong, Phainon.”

    “Then… what do we need to talk about?” He watches Phainon take a hesitant step forward. Mydei curses, frustrated, and jerks his head up.

    “I think we should take a break.”

    (These days, Mydei wonders if he's been living under the shadow of his past self all this time.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    36,671
    Chapters:
    3/3
    Comments:
    218
    Kudos:
    1,658
    Bookmarks:
    421
    Hits:
    20,405
  6. Tags
    Summary

    “Al-Haitham, what—”

    He freezes.

    There is a child in Al-Haitham’s covers, on Al-Haitham’s bed. A child. They can’t be older than two or three from how tiny they are. Their hair is a messy bird’s nest of gray strands, and their hands are small—gripped tight to Al-Haitham’s sheets. The child is drowning in the shirt they have on, the sleeves reaching their elbows and the collar drooping over their chest. For one nonsensical moment, Kaveh thinks, Al-Haitham never told him he had a child.

    (Al-Haitham turns into a kid. It goes about as well as you’d expect.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,408
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    53
    Kudos:
    735
    Bookmarks:
    119
    Hits:
    4,039
  7. Tags
    Summary

    “So you two never, say, fell into the same cot together?”

    He feels a sharp flick to his forehead. Phainon flinches, eyes lifting to meet Mydei’s scowl. Despite the severe expression, there’s a slight flush to his cheeks—his golden eyes shifting from Phainon’s gaze. Something in Phainon sinks like a stone.

    “Have you no propriety, Deliverer?” Mydei asks. “Did no one teach you any manners?”

    Phainon forces out a sheepish laugh, his smile unsteady.

    “My apologies,” he says.

    (Phainon doesn’t think there’s anything more pathetic than being jealous of a dead man.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,714
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    57
    Kudos:
    1,099
    Bookmarks:
    215
    Hits:
    6,700
  8. Tags
    Summary

    “To be honest, Mydeimos,” he says shakily, “I wish I had the courage to say what I wanted to say before you left. I wish I had the… I guess the selfishness to ask for what I want without reservations. I wish for a lot of things regarding you. And I pray for a lot of things from you as well. There are a lot of regrets I hold surrounding you. And I will probably hold them for a long time.”

    Mydei slowly straightens his posture, eyeing Phainon critically.

    “There is nothing stopping you from telling me now,” he says. “This is your prayer, after all.”

    (In which Mydei hears the people’s prayers in the form of dreams.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    7,701
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    41
    Kudos:
    467
    Bookmarks:
    96
    Hits:
    2,867
  9. Tags
    Summary

    For a moment, Kaveh simply stares—eyes trailing up and down Al-Haitham. The scent of mourning flowers weighs down the air—sticking to his throat like a certain kind of ambrosia. His hands are hesitant in their approach—cheeks pink.

    “What is it?” Al-Haitham asks, growing warm under the attention.

    “Nothing—nothing just—” he exhales shakily. And then, Kaveh’s hand suddenly strokes him from base to tip, and Al-Haitham’s breath hitches. “I can’t believe we’re doing this.”

    “We are,” he murmurs, lips quirked.

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,194
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    16
    Kudos:
    445
    Bookmarks:
    45
    Hits:
    5,691
  10. Tags
    Summary

    His first debate with Kaveh, Urchin of Kshahrewar, is a banal one—a topic many Vahumana scholars have argued to death for years.

    “Do you think human nature is inherently selfless or selfish?"

    (On human nature, ideals, and intellectual debate. Co-Authors: Al-Haitham of Haravatat & Kaveh of Kshahrewar)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,009
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    10
    Kudos:
    99
    Bookmarks:
    17
    Hits:
    566
  11. Tags
    Summary

    “You shouldn’t be offering your home so easily to people who aren’t your… your…” he waves his hand helplessly, gripping the blanket like he’s trying to choke it. It’s terrible, he thinks, how much this place smells like Al-Haitham.

    It’s worse still that he loves the scent just as much as he did when he was younger.

    (A home only has enough space for two mates. Kaveh wonders why he’s in Al-Haitham’s.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    3,960
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    2
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    1,003
    Bookmarks:
    132
    Hits:
    6,523
  12. Tags
    Summary

    When Kaveh first agreed to let Nilou set him up on a blind date, he didn’t think it would end up like this.

    Him, sitting in Puspa Cafe, fingers lightly tapping the side of his cup—and Al-Haitham, the Acting Grand Sage of the Akademiya, a decade older than Kaveh remembers and a decade more unfamiliar.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    25,287
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    82
    Kudos:
    700
    Bookmarks:
    199
    Hits:
    6,517
  13. Tags
    Summary

    “Fuck,” Kaveh breathes.

    “What? What happened?” Nilou turns—peeking over his shoulder and letting out a small “oh” before gently patting his back.

    “What’s wrong?” Dehya asks. Kaveh wordlessly hands her his phone and drops his head in his hands.

    “I’m never playing truth or dare again.”

    “Well, I mean. It’s not that bad,” he hears Dehya say, unsure. “You mentioned you were drunk. You’ve done plenty of dumb shit while drunk. You took this dare while drunk.”

    “Most of that dumb shit, Al-Haitham witnessed with his own eyes too,” Tighnari adds.

    Kaveh glares at Tighnari. Tighnari smiles and shrugs.

    (Kaveh confesses. Sort of.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,780
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    72
    Kudos:
    977
    Bookmarks:
    145
    Hits:
    5,554
  14. Tags
    Summary

    But, when he glances down, he finds Kaveh still nestled on his chest, back rising and falling in a steady rhythm.

    His lips quirk in a smile. The air smells of the two of them, and there’s no small amount of contentment in him to know they’ll both smell like each other for the rest of the day and maybe even tomorrow too.

    Selfish. He has never denied that he is selfish.

    (On matters of scenting and ruts.)

    Series
    Language:
    English
    Words:
    11,577
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    66
    Kudos:
    874
    Bookmarks:
    169
    Hits:
    6,031
  15. Tags
    Summary

    “Okay.” Kaveh pauses, just for a moment, to admire the way Al-Haitham’s hair fans out on the pillow, teal eyes staring up at him in earnest—in unending trust. It makes his heart ache. “I am going to touch you now."

    He lifts his hand, watching Al-Haitham stiffen until he’s brushing a single thumb across his cheek.

    Al-Haitham shudders.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,541
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    54
    Kudos:
    563
    Bookmarks:
    58
    Hits:
    5,643
  16. Tags
    Summary

    Neuvillette gives his final verdict. The defendant is found guilty of her crimes. Per protocol, he offers her the chance to fight.

    “I want to duel,” the defendant says, eyes cold and blazing.

    Neuvillette nods.

    “Monsieur Savinien,” he calls out.

    “No.” The girl’s words are curt. Her eyes scan the crowd until they land squarely on her. “I want a duel with Clorinde.”

    (There is never any satisfaction when her duels end in executions.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    4,843
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    32
    Kudos:
    581
    Bookmarks:
    77
    Hits:
    4,441
  17. Tags
    Summary

    Al-Haitham’s hand comes up to hold onto Kaveh’s. Within minutes, his breathing evens out and deepens in his sleep—only broken intermittently by his wheezes in between. Kaveh continues combing through Al-Haitham’s hair, up and down and up again. He slides his fingers through his bangs, rubs away the slight wrinkle near his brow, trails his fingers down the bridge of Al-Haitham’s nose, and traces over the curve of his cheek.

    Al-Haitham shifts, mumbling in his sleep—hand tightening over Kaveh’s wrist.

    Something painfully warm clicks in the softest parts of Kaveh’s heart.

    (Love, in the form of unconditional touch.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    9,924
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    108
    Kudos:
    1,165
    Bookmarks:
    305
    Hits:
    9,820
  18. Tags
    Summary

    Kaveh meets Al-Haitham again in Lambad’s Tavern—homeless, moraless, jobless with a dendro vision cinched to his waist to prove it.

    For lack of better words, Al-Haitham is shorter than he remembers.

    “Archons,” he breathes, looking him up and down. “What happened to you?”

    “I should be asking you that question,” Al-Haitham says, dry.

    “No. No, you really shouldn’t,” Kaveh says, shaking his head.

    Al-Haitham snorts.

    Al-Haitham gives Kaveh an ultimatum he is desperate to change.

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    20,365
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Comments:
    92
    Kudos:
    304
    Bookmarks:
    90
    Hits:
    3,591
  19. Tags
    Summary

    And then, his Akasha terminal lights up with an incoming message.

    Al-Haitham huffs harshly through his nose and opens his eyes. Hand on the terminal, he powers it on and finds both his brows raising.

    It’s a message from Kaveh.

    [3:46 am]
    i think i love him

    (Al-Haitham runs a case study on Kaveh and his love life.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    13,523
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    109
    Kudos:
    2,196
    Bookmarks:
    389
    Hits:
    19,663
  20. Tags
    Summary

    “You have trouble saying, ‘I love you,’” Al-Haitham states. “So, I’ve come up with a solution.”

    “What’s your solution then?”

    “We create a gesture to mean love."

    Al-Haitham taps the small of Kaveh’s back three times. Tap, tap, tap.

    I love you.

    (A translation in love.)

    Language:
    English
    Words:
    2,363
    Chapters:
    1/1
    Collections:
    1
    Comments:
    46
    Kudos:
    1,040
    Bookmarks:
    154
    Hits:
    5,735

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