Squiggles13
Fandoms
Recent works
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Flawed Perfection by Squiggles13
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV), Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
26 Oct 2025
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Summary
Bucky Barnes has a lot to contend with in the 21st century. One difficult task after another is laid out in front of him: managing his new found freedom, attending therapy and working through his trauma. It's a struggle, but recovery is not a straight line, as his therapist so often likes to remind him.
He has to navigate this friendship / relationship / whatever it is with Sam all the while managing his guilt and shame for his years as the Winter Soldier, and his grief over Steve's death. Then of course there’s these new super soldiers that have appeared out of nowhere that have to be dealt with, along with the frustrating inclusion of new faces, like Walker, and the familiar, like Zemo.
And then there is another task, one that sometimes seems to be the most difficult task of all: learning to be kind to his past self.
Rewrite / fix it of TFATWS – you do not need to read the other parts of this series, this works as a standalone. Pre TFATWS to about three months after the series ends. Not just a rehash of the TV series, I like to bounce off canon and do my own thing. I generally update fortnightly.
Series
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The Journey of Our Life by Squiggles13
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV)
13 Nov 2022
Tags
Summary
War creates invisible scars that never go away
This story is part of a series but can be read by itself, it is self-contained.
This is the story of Bucky's experiences from 1943 to 1945, from the Battle of Azzano and Krausberg in 1943 to falling off the train in 1945.
This is a story about friendship, solidarity, brotherhood, secrets, betrayal and trauma.
Bucky went through a lot more in World War 2 than Steve ever knew about, this is the story of what happened. So much trauma, and angst. And blackmail and military homophobia. Please check the tags.
He never would have thought it possible for a person to be held hostage by their own brain, but that’s what it felt like now. Sheer force of will could only get you so far.
He felt a horrible sense of inevitability and impending doom that there was only one way out of the dreadful situation he had managed to get himself into.
And sometimes he felt such a deep desire and such a desperate longing to simply just not exist anymore.
Completed
Series
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Poor Brainwashed Toy Soldier by Squiggles13
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe
02 Jul 2022
Tags
Summary
This is Part three of a series but can absolutely be read as a standalone.
This is a one shot
It has been a year since the failure of Project Insight, and since Bucky visited that museum to see the man who shared his face and read about events he has no memory of. Bucky has been on the run ever since and a lot of people are looking for him - law enforcement, armies, the Avengers, Hydra. He's in Slovenia when he gets found and chased down by Hydra, and comes face to face with the man who owned him for 18 years and was his whole world - Brock Rumlow. There's a history there, and it's hard to shake off.“Poor, brainwashed toy soldier,” Rumlow said as he stroked Bucky’s face. “To see what they did to you. It must be breaking Cap’s heart.”
Series
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My Lack of Control by Squiggles13
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Captain America (Movies), The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV)
25 Jun 2022
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Summary
It is 2023. Four weeks ago Steve lost his life in the battle against Thanos, sacrificing his life, as did many others, in order to save the universe. After the Final battle Bucky gave himself up and was taken to the Raft. A month later Sam breaks in to the prison to try to knock some sense into him, as Bucky really can be his own worst enemy. Bucky meanwhile has a head full of regrets and remorse, and guilt. His memories have been slowly starting to return, and he is beginning to realise that he had kept secrets from Steve all his life. Big ones.
Part two of a series but can be read as a standalone. One shot. Entire series is written, and will be updated weekly
Entire series is eventual Sam / Bucky, but they are still just getting to know each other at this point. And right now Bucky is just so damn frustrating, I’m pretty certain Sam just wants to shake some sense into him, or bash his head against a wall really hard.
Series
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Lost; Then Found by Squiggles13
Fandoms: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
17 Jun 2022
Tags
Summary
It is 2016 and Bucky has been on the run for two years. He has been evading Hydra, evading Steve’s bird friend, and trying to keep a low profile. And one day he finds out he’s supposedly blown up the United Nations and there Steve is, in his apartment. The museum said Steve Rogers was his brother, but he doesn’t remember him at all. But here he is, and pretty soon it all goes to Hell.
Completed
Series
Recent series
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The Trials and Tribulations of James Bucky Barnes by Squiggles13
Fandom Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV)
26 Oct 2025
Summary
This series is focused on telling Bucky's story from his WW2 days to the modern day. This is a story about trauma, betrayal, grief and recovery spanning 100 years, not to mention his horrific Hydra experiences. The series follows the beats of the MCU but it has its own plot points, and is not just a retelling of the films.
There is a lot of focus on mental health, therapy, and what I hope is a realistic depiction of recovery. There is a lot of angst but I promise a happy ending. Bucky is haunted by his misguided feelings of guilt and shame for his actions as the Winter Soldier and the choices he made that led him there.
The series is split into parts because Bucky's significant relationships change throughout his life, - Steve & Bucky, Howard & Bucky during the war, Bucky & Steve during Civil War, and then Sam & Bucky post 2023, and the parts reflect this.
This is a Sam / Bucky story. Steve and Bucky grew up as brothers. This series is not Peggy Carter friendly. Steve died in the final battle against Thanos instead of going back in time.
I intend to continue on with the series to include events of Cap 4 and Thunderbolts when these films release.
- Words:
- 426,119
- Works:
- 5
- Bookmarks:
- 76
Recent bookmarks
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Шпрахенгевир by SkadiLaughedFirst, Wish_I_Had_A_Tail
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV), Marvel Cinematic Universe
05 Dec 2021
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Summary
Hydra’s Winter Soldier Project is still in its infancy when the Red Army takes Berlin. In the chaos, the NKVD get their hands on the Soldier. High hopes for a Soviet superhero are slightly stalled by the fact that brainwashing was not Arnim Zola’s field. And nearly everything about this project is classified – even for the scientists working on it.
It’s really hard to get anything done when – both literally and figuratively - no one is speaking the same language.
Series
- Part 2 of One Fight to Another
Bookmarked by Squiggles13
13 Jun 2021
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In Triplicate by SkadiLaughedFirst, Wish_I_Had_A_Tail
Fandoms: Captain America - All Media Types, Captain America (Movies), The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV)
03 Nov 2025
Tags
Summary
The Winter Soldier Program continues to grow, as do the career aspirations of a young Alexander Pierce. Time passes, technology evolves, wars start and end and start again. Everything changes. Except the Soldier.
An examination of the Winter Soldier Program from 1961-1992.
Series
- Part 3 of One Fight to Another
Bookmarked by Squiggles13
14 Oct 2024
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Tags
Summary
They say that boys go to war, and men come back from it. When Sergeant James Barnes is deployed to the front lines in 1943, he learns that living through war means living in the shadow of death every minute of every day — and that even in the thrall of that dark shadow, hope and love can blossom in the unlikeliest of places.
**Cross-posted from fanfiction.net**
Bookmarked by Squiggles13
02 Mar 2024
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a matter of perspective by Spintwin
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV), The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Marvel, Marvel Cinematic Universe
20 Nov 2021
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Summary
When Bucky Barnes falls from the train, Steve Rogers jumps straight after him. Unfortunately, that doesn’t mean either of them is safe.
Bookmarked by Squiggles13
30 Nov 2021
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What'd I Miss? by SkadiLaughedFirst, Wish_I_Had_A_Tail
Fandoms: Captain America (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Falcon and the Winter Soldier (TV)
23 Oct 2022
Tags
Summary
Rumlow's on his way back from a mission. He's tired and pissed off, and the whole thing was a pain in the ass, especially 'cause it meant he had to be out of the country while Insight was going down. He hopes everything went okay.
Guess he'll find out once he turns his phone back on.
- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 95,382
- Chapters:
- 15/15
- Collections:
- 1
- Comments:
- 573
- Kudos:
- 564
- Bookmarks:
- 154
- Hits:
- 12,561
Bookmarked by Squiggles13
28 Dec 2021