The_Unserious_Classicist
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This is the story of how a cinnamon roll unlocks the inner cinnamon roll in a could-actually-kill-you roll with the power of love, song, and tea. Watch how these two cinnamon rolls compete in a heart-stopping battle to out-cinnamon-roll each other as they play a delicate game of how-close-can-you-get-to-being-a-couple-without-actually-being-a-couple. Expect to see multiple stretches of plotless sappy dialogue, lazily-written side characters that only exist to serve the romance, and such obscene acts of cinnamon-rollery as to put your grandma’s recipe to shame.
Or: a silly little fic that fills in the gaps between “Road to Hell” and “All I’ve Ever Known” with cute, fluffy encounters and deliciously angsty episodes through which our precious little cinnamon rolls fall in love. The burn is painfully slow and rife with a sense of yearning so intense it should be illegal. I regret nothing.
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Kuni thought his story came to a close decades ago. Time has knit his wounds into faded scars, and he no longer bemoans his fate, content to wander about Inazuma aimlessly. But his quiet, solitary life is disrupted when he is summoned by none other than Ei, the god who betrayed him, who offers him a peculiar deal.
Snezhnaya’s Tsaritsa has selected her heir, Prince Ajax, and he requires a wife who is fit to rule by his side. She has devised a unique selection process for the occasion: the Royal Snezhnayan Courtship Trials.
Aware of Inazuma’s isolationist policy and refusal to engage in the Courtship Trials, the Tsaritsa requests only one girl from Inazuma to enter the Trials: Ei’s puppet and daughter, Raiden. But unbeknownst to the Tsaritsa, Ei has no intention of letting Raiden participate.
Thus begins the delicate balancing act Ei must perform to get her way. The plan: send an imposter in Raiden’s stead. But impersonating a divine creation is no easy task. To pull it off, one would have to resemble Ei and also possess divine Electro power. There are only three who fit that description: Ei, who has duties in Inazuma, Raiden, whom Ei refuses to send…
…And Kuni.
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A Zutara Titanic AU where Katara is Jack and Zuko is Rose. Several creative liberties were taken, of course. I wrote a beautiful summary for this work but it’s above the max character count, and I couldn’t bear to trim it down, so I’ll put it in the notes.
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Long ago, disaster struck Teyvat. The Abyss unleashed a devastating war on the Seven Nations, one that threatened to end the reign of humanity...and the divine. In an effort to protect their people, the gods signed a contract, one that would join the Seven Nations together into one single nation, Teyvat. They hoped that as one, unified country, Teyvat stood a better chance against the Abyss. However, as decades passed, the true meaning of the contract was forgotten. Systems were corrupted, and tyrants exploited the circumstances to abuse their power. Now rife with fear and cruelty, this is the world that the orphaned Lumine must navigate through.
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Carry On, Survivor by The_Unserious_Classicist
Fandoms: 原神 | Genshin Impact (Video Game)
23 Mar 2022
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When a devastating incident destroys his hometown, the life of young Ajax is torn to pieces. Numb, traumatized, and with nowhere else to go, he joins a strange but kindhearted girl on her journeys throughout the land. As he slowly attempts to glue his life back together, he is overwhelmed by grief, and as if the universe hasn't already dealt him a poor enough hand, he has to navigate through this difficult time with a permanent curse to grapple with. At first, he handles it remarkably well, and the temporary period of stability allows him to pursue—and deepen—his feelings for his unlikely travel companion. Alas, time and nature are not on his side, and the threat of death looms perpetually over his head unless he finds a way to cope with the quality of his existence...lest it become his undoing.
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After a moment, Eurydice decides he can stand a touch more teasing. “You’re a mess, lover boy.”
Orpheus makes a show of rolling his eyes before slinging an arm around her shoulders and leaning into her. “Yeah, but you’re stuck with me,” he says into the crook of her neck. “No takebacks.”
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Or: Orpheus doesn't turn around. Eurydice is confused.
Series
- Part 1 of Loose Threads
Bookmarked by The_Unserious_Classicist
17 Mar 2026
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"Maybe," Orpheus tries, "we shouldn't drink it."
Eurydice stares at the bottle; it is deceptively small, but filled to the brim with a silvery liquid that seems to glow from within. Behind it, Persephone raises her eyebrows, her smile wide and a little devilish.
"Or," Eurydice counters, "we could drink it dry. Both of us. The whole thing."
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Persephone brings a gift. It makes them see the world a little differently.- Language:
- English
- Words:
- 2,189
- Chapters:
- 1/1
- Collections:
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- Comments:
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- Kudos:
- 72
- Bookmarks:
- 18
- Hits:
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Bookmarked by The_Unserious_Classicist
05 Feb 2026
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As games went, it wasn't very fun. But it was informative.
It taught her that everyone -- everyone would hurt her.
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Orpheus is always gentle. Eurydice plays an old game from her past.Bookmarked by The_Unserious_Classicist
05 Feb 2026
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if i'm gonna bleed let it bleed (from inside) by littlelcvestory
Fandoms: Hadestown - Mitchell
08 Dec 2025
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Orpheus' shoulders ache.
For the first time on this long, long, walk, he takes off his lyre. He cranes his neck around to look at his shoulder and is horrified to find that his shirt is completely soaked through with red.
He looks at the lyre in his lap and runs his hands along the leather strap attached to both ends of it. Then his fingers come across something wet.
When he draws his hand away, his fingers are stained red.
or: after all the time orpheus spent walking through hell with his lyre, wouldn't it have scarred?
Bookmarked by The_Unserious_Classicist
13 Dec 2025
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the path to paradise, and likewise the road to ruin by underneath_stars
Fandoms: Six of Crows Series - Leigh Bardugo, Hadestown - Mitchell, Shadow and Bone (TV)
28 Feb 2026
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Wylan was a waiter and performer at the railroad station outside of Ketterdam. Jesper was a gambler who had been chased out of everywhere he'd ever been by debts and the wind. Kaz was the King of Ketterdam's criminal underworld, collecting souls and making more money than a man could use in a lifetime. Inej was the Wraith every winter and Captain Ghafa during the summer. Nina and Matthias were the owners of the train station, who had been through this song and dance before.
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Six of Crows Hadestown AU because of Jack Wolfe's run as Orpheus on Broadway
Series
- Part 2 of crossovers my beloved
Bookmarked by The_Unserious_Classicist
13 Dec 2025