murdermewithbooks
Fandoms
- 9-1-1 (TV) (9)
- Narcos (TV) (8)
- The Mandalorian (TV) (7)
- Star Wars - All Media Types (3)
- Triple Frontier (2019) (2)
Recent works
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Summary
Eddie tries to ignore the bewildered expressions on his friends' faces as he makes his way onto the small stage. Thoughts like this is dumb, why am I doing this, what the hell am I trying to prove, all run through Eddie's mind. His only comforting thought is at least I can just blame it on the alcohol.
The song he chose might be (definitely is) too revealing, but it's too late to go back and change it as the first notes of the song start to play. He's committed now, so he might as well just go for it…
~~~
or: Eddie pines for his best friend who's already in a relationship with another man, but that doesn't stop him from taking the stage and singing his heart out. consequences be damned. at least, until he walks into Buck's apartment and his heart completely shatters.
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Now, as Buck opens the door looking soft in his sleep-rumpled clothes and unruly curls, all thoughts of what Eddie was going to say flee his mind. All that’s left is the burning need to be close to Buck.
It’s all he wants.
He wants and he wants and he wants. So he lets his instincts take over, hoping he doesn’t completely ruin one of the most amazing friendships he’s ever had with what he’s about to do.
~
OR: buck and eddie get caught under the mistletoe and eddie freaks out, leaving buck to question what he thought was impossible (inspired by the end scene in New Girl when Nick kisses Jess for the first time)
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Summary
"Eddie, I don't-I don't know what to say." Buck is breathless, his lungs screaming for larger intakes of air but his brain refuses to cooperate with basic functional demands. He swallows around nothing, wincing at the dryness suddenly of his throat.
"You don't have to say anything. I just wanted you to know that you're important to me–to Chris–and no matter what happens, we will always be here for you. And you’ll always be my best friend,” Eddie whispers, his eyes glossy. “I don’t expect you to feel the same way, I’ve already come to terms with that. But…I'm gonna love you anyway, and in any way you let me, Buck, because I can't not feel this way about you. Trust me, I've tried," Eddie chuckles wetly, a splash of pink coloring his cheeks. "I just wanted you to know," he says quietly, looking down at his feet and instantly breaking the connection.
~~~
OR: Eddie confesses his feelings and Buck questions what he believed to be just a solid friendship but may actually be something more, something he hadn't allowed himself to want in a long time.
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Today is cause for celebration. Not for Eddie, it’s actually the opposite for Eddie. It’s more so a day of mourning–mourning for what could have been, what is, and what can never be.
See, his best friend–the man he’s entrusted with his son, his very heart and the center of his entire universe–is getting married today. And to Taylor Kelly, no less. What should be one of the happiest days of Buck’s life is actually the most miserable, soul-crushing day of Eddie’s.
Eddie doesn’t know what’s worse–the fact that Buck is marrying her, or the fact that he isn’t marrying Eddie instead. Because as much as he tried to deny it, to force himself to not feel this all-consuming love for one Evan Buckley, Eddie could never truly carve him out of his heart. He is as much a part of Eddie as Eddie’s own flesh and bones are a part of him.
So, yeah, this day definitely calls for a stronger drink or two or twelve.
OR: it's the day of buck's wedding and eddie is...sitting in a bar, trying his hardest to Not think about buck marrying someone who isn't him
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Summary
As he lay there in the bathtub, the liquid surrounding him filled with more blood than water at this point, he can't help but feel an overwhelming sense of disappointment.
Disappointment in knowing he will never see his family again—never make amends for the things he has done—but most of all, in himself for letting this happen. Because once again, it was his own selfish actions that led him here, right to death's door.
~~~
or: post-lawsuit, Buck gets attacked by Chase Mackey in his own home and nearly bleeds to death. Eddie reevaluates his behavior towards Buck and falls apart at the thought of losing one of the two people he can't live without (first 2 chapters are the most graphic/violent, then we get softer as the series goes on)
Recent bookmarks
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The unofficial and unsuccessful almost-proposal of Eddie Diaz by songbvrd
Fandoms: 9-1-1 (TV)
07 Jan 2026
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Summary
“Okay, please say something.” Buck managed, “I was only being weird because I didn’t want to be weird. Which I know sounds counter-intuitive, but I just wanted Christmas to be so perfect for you, because it’s our first Christmas together. I— I don’t know why I thought—”
“It, uh, it isn’t my ring from Shannon.”
Buck, obviously a linguistic mastermind, managed out a quiet ‘huh?’ in response.
“The… ring.” He sounded like he was clearing a brick from his throat. “It isn’t from my first wedding.”
“Abuela?” He asked, a little stupidly.
Eddie, seemingly broken from whatever silent stupor he was trapped in, snorted.
“No. Buck.” He stepped forward, swallowing and visibly forcing a smile onto his face. “It’s… for you. I mean, eventually.”
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Buck finds a ring Eddie was planning to use to 'eventually' propose to him. He is obviously very normal and composed about this information.
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“Hey,” Buck says, nudging Eddie with his elbow. He tips his chin towards the toothbrush in Eddie’s hands. “Gimme that when you’re done.”
Eddie pauses, the circular motions of his brushing coming to a halt. The toothbrush stays wedged between his teeth. His mouth still hangs open. “Uh,” he says, and toothpaste trickles from the corner of his mouth. “My toothbrush?”
Except — it comes out more like muh too bruh?
Buck snorts, chest glowing warm, and nods. “Yeah, what else?”
Eddie’s brow wrinkles, and his nose scrunches. “Uh, no?” He replies. “That’s gross.”
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Buck hovers. Eddie tries to cooks.
Somehow, this leads to Eddie calling Buck pretty and his spiral into finally confronting what he's been feeling for years.
Bookmarked by murdermewithbooks
27 Jan 2026
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“Just don’t expect me to walk you down the aisle,” Phillip laughed, looking around like he expected the rest to agree.
And when no one did, glancing at one another in shock, confusion, and hurt on his behalf... it’d been the last straw:
“I wouldn’t ask you to,” Buck said, as if discussing something as inconsequential as the weather, “I’d ask Bobby.”
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or Buck experiences the unconditional love of a parent for the first time in his life at a five year-old's birthday party.
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Summary
A little 9x08 coda because Buck not crashing out was out of character.